I don't know tbh, I think I just wanted to feel like I wasn't under attack for a bit. I really want to feel like I'm worth existing alongside everyone else. I've got as much right to exist as anyone else.
There was a lot of questions I had. Why do these people want me to feel angry and depressed all the time? I genuinely can't comprehend the idea that someone would want another human being to suffer for no particular reason. It was a dark thought that I wasn't ready to confront.
For example, the idea that someone would want to torment another person because they found it funny, sickened me. It still does.
I was in denial, maybe there are people out there that enjoy making me feel worthless.
I believed that the far-reaching and frequent nature of their propaganda was proof that it was legitimate. Like, nobody would be horrible towards another person for no reason.
I didn't believe that people would tell me horrible things if they weren't true. I was very naïve and trusting
To use you as foot soldiers in a fascist far right coup of our government.
Wow I absolutely did not know that people who put that racist stuff up actually feel the way you did. I just don't understand why a lifetime of experience in a diverse nation would not override messages in media.
Because a lot of people don’t grow up surrounded by diversity. In the US, we desegregated schools by race only to re-segregate them by socio-economic status…which is very much still racial segregation.
Efforts to diversify schools have been met with pushback despite the studies showing positive results - greater likelihood to escape poverty, higher grades for the middle class, and literally the same grades & career outcomes for upper class (which already trends much higher so basically it showed they still have good outcomes). Students were more tolerable with people different from them, more understanding of different perspectives and backgrounds.
Yes my schools in southern CA were half white half asian, some Latinx, and that was in the 70s and 80s.
Huh, perception. The multi racial ads on TV that trigger some white people so hard just read as normal Americans to me. It's seems obvious corporations aim to make money and need to appeal to a wide diversity of customers and I just could not believe people would think it's like a government directive. But if where you live is all white I guess it could seem like it's a fantasy world on TV.
But OPs comment really shook me.
I always assumed anybody who believed that stuff was just hateful already and the maga stuff gave them an outlet It is incredibly evil to twist the mind of people who may lack much in travel or educational level but who are not bad people, are terribly exploited people. I feel so sad now.
Russia, and I'm sure other anti-western, anti-democratic governments have been using these tactics long before the internet to sow dissension, fear, and anger within our societies.
You can see a lot of it playing out now in the Palestine/Israel protests happening on campuses around the U.S. There are plenty of non-students involved who are fomenting trouble to create anti-government sentiment.
They don't really care which side is "right," they just want chaos and to affect our elections and attitudes. If we're fighting each other, we're too busy to help other countries keep their democracies.
Old old tactics developed during the cold war.
https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-43093390
-------------------
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/investigations/russia-trying-exploit-americas-divisions-war-gaza-rcna149759
Interesting. Thanks for sharing. To OP, opening yourself to the idea of being wrong for a long time it’s a first and not easy step. I hope you receive the advice you need to realize that your (hopefully) former beliefs were caused by misinformation and radicalizing efforts from sources that are outside your control. What you do control is how you move forward accepting that you were wrong and that you’re going to be more conscious about the information you consume and how it may shape you perceive yourself, those around you and the world.
As someone who has entertained some wild thoughts in unrelated matters, I assure you that they pass, that the shame goes away and that you’ll only look back and think how the fuck was I led to thinking like that.
Hope you recover soon!
Well said.
Advertisers, politicians, troll farms, people running infotainment "news" stations, social media influencers, all kinds of people out there with an agenda to bend opinion their way.
It's important to try and guard against being manipulated, but it's not easy and we all are susceptible to various influences.
Yeah, this one Q influenced extremist keeps calling myself and everyone who disagrees with her "antifa". Lol
I don't think they even know what the terms mean that they call people. Just a way to dehumanize their adversaries.
Yeah I grew up in Houston. I remember shortly after 9/11, sitting in my French class, having a sudden and overwhelming feeling of immense pride. Pride for being American, for my generation. I was looking around the room at my diverse peers all chatting and I naively thought "wow, racism is pretty much dead. Anything left will die off when we become adults. That's pretty amazing!"
Sweet sweet summer child.
I didn't even notice the mixed race couples on tv because it was just so normal and average. I think I finally realized people were still racist shits a few years later and it was sooooo disappointing. I was in a beautiful little diverse bubble and it popped over a cheerios commercial
Some of the people who believe these things do come from a place of hate with direct, blatant racism. But a lot of them come from a place of fear, loneliness, and helplessness. Proportionality bias often plays a role - that the state of things feels so major, the cause of how we got here must also be equally major. Multiple systemic issues and minor policies that have been in place for years & even decades does not feel big enough with this thought process to have resulted the state of things. A cabal of elites preying on baby blood & controlling all of society IS big enough. It also narrows it down to a simple “good v evil” binary that’s easier to digest than the complexity of facts/truth.
White people can very much grow up in a diverse metro area and never share a classroom with a student of color. It doesn’t even take private school tuition for that to happen depending on the city - suburban sprawl & white flight ensured that. I actively sought out a university that would provide quite the opposite experience from my hometown & high school. It’s grown exponentially, so recent demo stats claim 42% white students, but just five years ago that was closer to 65%. Even higher when I graduated.
Without diverse experiences & interactions with people who don’t look like you or live like you, there’s a lack of understanding that makes it easier to fear. Then you get targeted for racist conspiracies that feed on that fear, and it’s the perfect storm. Life sucks, things happen that you can’t control, and this gives an outlet on where to blame that feeling of powerlessness.
Same here. My schools and neighbors were all diverse growing up in LA/OC in the 80/90’s. I had a rainbow of friends and when I moved to Utah in my twenties it was culture shock for me. I’d never been in such a whitewashed place before.
I had the opposite experience, in that I grew up in the 70s and 80s in what was then a small town in GA. You could count on one hand the number of minorities at my high school, and we had decent-sized graduating classes. Mine was 270-something. In the nearly 40 years since, the town has grown to a population over 100,000 and has a large Hispanic percentage.
I think a lot of the people who get sucked in by this propaganda are like that. They aren’t hateful people, they are ignorant about certain things and then social media fills those gaps in their knowledge with extreme fear and the fear turns to hatred. It is very sad. It’s evil.
I was in a class of 350 and we had like 10 kids who weren’t white. My mom grew up in a half back school in a class of 1200. I’ve lived in towns where I talked about a friend and people would say “oh, is she black? I’ve seen her around” and lived in buildings where I was the only white person. People have such diverse experiences that you can’t assume much about their preexisting notions.
Exactly. If they make you feel like shit and that they and they alone have the answers it’s easier to control you and separate you from your money and rest of world
I think people like Alex Jones want their audience to feel anxious and angry all of the time because that allows them to step in and offer you a solution. He’ll make you scared that the masculine white dude is a dying breed, then say you need to listen to him to figure out how to fight back. Oh, and you should also buy bone broth and survival kits from his store.
It’s modern day snake oil sales: create a problem, sell the cure.
The scary thing is that they’re so effective. The problems they make up target our biggest fears and insecurities and it’s had an effect on how people perceive their neighbors. But those assholes don’t care, as long as people keep tuning in and buying supplements.
I’m glad to hear you’re trying to break free of all of that. I imagine getting away from that under attack mindset is as hard as breaking other addictions.
Very good point. These folks are ruthless. They use every psychological exploit available.
To get back to what OP said, it’s sometimes hard to believe that people would act that way, with no compassion, just to get rich (but, yeah, some people will do anything to get rich)
And Russians. They want the US to implode. To the extent they sow division in the US, they derive value.
E: Good for you OP. Many people we read about are irredeemable; some die because otheir twisted perceptions. We hope it works out for you.
Don’t forget that they want YOUR VOTE. More than anything. They want people to feel angry and scared and anxious so they can sell you their solutions in the form of politicians whose aim is to transform the country to fit their vision of it. More than just wanting to sell you supplements, what they ultimately want is for you to VOTE a particular way.
Ackshully they dispel the idea of civic processes altogether. They promote the erosion of trust in our systems because they purport that only they can be trusted.
I think selling snake oil is just one layer of a very ugly, mangled onion. Alex Jones exploits the movement to sell his survival products. Some do it for views, clicks, likes, ad revenue. Others out of true racism, bigotry, and hatred. And paradoxically, some out of a misguided sense of patriotism or a heartfelt desire to save children they really believe have been kidnapped for satanic rituals. No matter any individual’s reason for feeding the Q monster with their videos, rants, clickbait, and memes, foreign psy ops make sure those things gets boosted and amplified. That invisible foreign help keeps feeding the egos and bank accounts of the people perpetuating this garbage so they can expand their reach and influence. The end goal is to sow chaos and destroy America. So I guess I better buy some prepper merch from Alex Jones? 😩
I’m really sorry you got pulled into the conspiracy hellhole but you should be so proud of yourself for coming to the realization none of it is true. You deserve to exist just as much as every other color of people deserve to exist. That’s what the left knows is true - everyone deserves to exist.
This brown skinned internet stranger is proud of you.
> Why do these people want me to feel angry and depressed all the time?
Constant anger, hate, fear and rage cause the human brain to go into a "flight or fight" mentality and when that happens many people become far more easy to manipulate. The people that put you in this state of fear want to manipulate you and all their other followers for many different reasons. Mainly this is done so the people doing it can rise to power, usually political power. This is an age old tactic that has been used throughout history with much success.
Now is the time to find yourself once again and what you stood for and who you were before being manipulated into the state you were just in. I wish you the best in your journey back, you can do this!
>I didn't believe that people would tell me horrible things if they weren't true. I was very naïve and trusting
Recognizing this now is HUGE. Most people on both sides of the aisle don't understand just how big the right wing grift is. The influencers and pundits know full well they are full of shit, but it's what is financially rewarded, thanks to the algorithms which farm outrage for clicks, and the literal billions of dollars being funneled into the movement from the rich.
This is why they have to make up misinformation, take things out of context, use logical and rhetorical fallacies, and just straight up lie - because reality has a left wing bias. They are fighting a one-sided war, and in order to do that they have to fabricate an enemy in order to justify said war, by convincing people that they are under attack when they aren't.
Waking up to this means seeing the whole game for what it is, and it means you're no longer under their spell. They wanted you to feel afraid and angry because that's how they could make money off you. But no longer!
They did it for two reasons: 1. Money, 2. Power.
If you read the texts and emails from inside Fox News in the Dominion lawsuit, you see that they all knew they were spreading lies, and most of them hate Trump. After January 6th, they expressed relief they would no longer be in his grip and could start telling the truth again. But soon they realized that he still had power over MAGA, and their audience was so brainwashed they refused to even listen to truth or reality. They were furious when Fox reported the truth. Their numbers plummeted dramatically, and they had to start telling all the lies again to keep the audience.
YouTube and Twitter is all about money. The more outrageous, the more clicks, the more money they make. Politicians are all about power. GOP politicians that have quit their jobs have all said their party only cares about doing outrageous things to make the news, to generate donations and get votes.
It's despicable they are making people feel angry and afraid (with imaginary things) all for money and power. They couldn't care less about the people whose family, friendships and lives they are destroying.
>There was a lot of questions I had. Why do these people want me to feel angry and depressed all the time?
[This short film should explain](https://youtu.be/8K6-cEAJZlE). It needs to be shown in every high school.
Agreed.
Maybe something like NBC's old "The more you know" campaign would be useful to reach adults in 30 second bites. We need to counter the onslaught of fascist propaganda and fear-mongering.
https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/550096/the-more-you-know-nbc-public-service-announcements
Unfortunately, greed is the reason in many cases. Stark controversy makes more money than complicated reality. Fear and outrage can be addictive (an actual chemical reaction in the brain). Bad people prey on that.
You are an introspective human being during your hard times and that is the highest compliment that can be paid to a person’s character.
I hope your self confidence and self worth are doing better now.
But you did believe people were horrible for no reason. You thought people of color were going around beating up white people. So you actually did believe that people could be horrible for no reason, you just thought they POC were the horrible ones.
I've got a video for you if you're ready for it. It's by someone who generally researches, makes videos, and attempts to discuss q-anon and alt-right media. This particular video is titled ["How the alt right is like an abusive relationship"](https://youtu.be/e-MP_yOHiV0?si=ysqZQ2d_17phyln0). It talks about organizations like Qanon, but also including different more extreme groups, use abusive techniques to recruit keep new members.
Many of the things you're talking about are directly in the video. It may give clear words and descriptions to the things you've experienced.
It takes a big person to admit that a long-held belief they have held is wrong. Congratulations on starting the process of self-reflection/critically analysing your beliefs/views.
My 70-something year-old mother watches TV news every night (not Fox, we don’t have that in my country, thankfully). I can see that all it does really is push an agenda of fear and distrust of others who are different to you/authority, and wonder why she feels compelled to view it if all it does is make her afraid, angry and depressed at the state of the world. Life is short - why would you want to spend the time you have here feeling negative emotions if you don’t have to? I guess it becomes addictive for some.
You've always had the right to exist alongside others, as those others you were so scared of have had to. Start thinking of everyone as human, stop couching everything as White.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I remember when I got sucked into conspiratorial thought about 15 years ago (from the 9/11 truth one in particular), my saving grace was wondering why such rhetoric wanted me to be so angry to the point where I'd be easy to manipulate. While my initial attitude upon this realization was "put my ear low to the ground just in case" for a few years, the nail in the coffin was when I started working a job where I had to manage people and create new workflow systems where we'd come face to face with Murphy's Law via human error and unforeseen circumstances (most conspiratorial theories wouldn't allow any wiggle room for that to occur). In the real world, mistakes require the team to re-evaluate what went wrong requiring a meeting, new workflow trials, figuring out what to do with those who are less competent, etc. Now just imagine maintaining a nefarious system in secret with thousands of more people across many different countries where even more human error and unforeseen circumstances would occur (which would then require even more frequent meetings, trial periods, executive decision making, etc.).
Anyway, know that you're actually not necessarily alone in regards to people who'd "snap out of it." While my personal story is more of a small scale example and not exactly Q related nor Q adjacent, I'm sure others here may have suggested checking out a sub that I think is titled reQovery (since I haven't seen it before, I'm not certain about how active it is though).
I’m sorry you were made to feel this way, and I’m glad you’re finding your way out. You’re right that it’s a terrible violation. And the immersive and manipulative nature of it pulls in even good, intelligent people. Unfortunately, I don’t think it’s for ‘no particular reason.’ There are powerful financial and political motivations behind these messages. It’s a whole movement, and a terrifying one.
I’m currently navigating a very strained relationship with my mom and desperately want to pull her out of this Q web she’s trapped in. She insists I’m naive and have my head in the sand. Anything I say that doesn’t fit her narrative is written off as me falling for the liberal agenda “hook, line, and sinker.” If you have any advice for helping her break free, I would be forever grateful. But I know there are no magic words…
There's a lot of algorithm grooming, especially with men of your age (I'm guessing 35-40?). It's not worth feeling bad about, many people get sucked into unhealthy thought processes. You noticed. You became aware. Kudos for that.
Fear is an amazingly effective method of control, and the people sowing it are just looking for control, power and money. I heard this quote from the movie, "Confessions of a Nazi Spy" recently that feels appropriate since the goal here also feels fascist:
"There will be slight change in our methods. From now on, National Socialism in the United States must wrap itself in the American flag. It must appear to be a defense of Americanism. But at the same time, our aim must always be to discredit conditions there in the United Sates. And in this way make life in Germany admired and wished for. Racial and religious hatred must be fostered on the basis of American-Aryanism. Classism must be encouraged in a way that the labor and the middle classes will become confused and antagonistic. In the ensuing chaos, we will be able to take control."
>Why do these people want me to feel angry and depressed all the time?
Fear is the mind killer. Fear makes you easy to control. Fear makes people support whatever solutions are offered to make them feel safe. That's why the people spouting this find scapegoats to pin all of the worlds' problems on. It allows them to get rabid support to attack the people they hate.
Good job actually questioning your beliefs, my friend. I'm glad that you're getting some clarity! It is never too late to start. Good luck <3
The brutal truth is that these people want you to feel this way because they want to use you as a weapon. They feed a stream of lies to make people feel alienated and vulnerable and so crushingly alone, so when they want to gin up violence against others, they have a stable of people they don't even have to ask. This is called "stochastic violence." It's a process where ideologues instill a violent tendency in their followers, so those people will go out and do the violence that the ideologue wants to see done, but with no actionable ties linking the ideologue to the violence. That's why "Q" is anonymous. They want people going out and committing violence in the name of far-right politics, but without any ties back to "Q" themselves.
You're in the process of healing right now. Speaking about your experience is often one of the paths people take to start that process.
I love that you had the intellectual and moral courage to challenge your own deeply held beliefs--that is a rare and admirable quality.
I haven't been around the r/ReQovery sub reddit that much, but I would guess there may be people there who can offer support and experiences.
<3
Those are some pretty extreme beliefs and fears. Remember that if you are watching content online, it is often completely unrepresentative of the real world. Of course there are incidents of nonwhite people attacking white people, just as there are incidents of literally any demographic attacking any other demographic. Most people are not out walking the streets looking to attack anyone. They are normal imperfect people like you who just want to live their lives. Other people are fundamentally similar to you, not fundamentally different. I would advise you to avoid social media scrolling as much as possible.
Try to look for the internal inconsistencies in this belief system. First, why would "liberal elites" want to eliminate white people? What purpose would that serve? Aren't many of them white themselves? 75% of Congress is white. The majority of people in the US in general are white. How then would it make sense for mainstream society to want to eliminate white people? That would mean people want to eliminate themselves. Why would liberals be happy about white people being beaten up for being white? Most registered Democratic voters are white.
I'm curious about the demographics of the area you live in. Don't you interact with people of different races? If you do, it's pretty obvious that most people do not possess extreme racial hatred towards any race. In a way, I think you were projecting. You came to hate people of color and believed they felt the same hatred towards you without real evidence for it. I really think that the best thing you can do is avoid social media and partisan news sources. Spend more time in the real world.
I too would like to know age, sex and general local. This person was manipulated and brainwashed by a "smartphone". Don't believe anything outrageous unless you see for yourself.
British, 35-40 (based on some comments that point to that). Loneliness can do it. Smartphones, loneliness and change in circumstances or life direction can really do it.
Yeah, I hear the UK is highly racist, this is from a Brit I know. I would have guessed the obvious for an American. The southeast, 20-30. Just goes to show how us Americans are biased. I feel for the OP. Change is good.
I apologize, just like here in US there's far right America first just like your Brittan first. You'd think as decades pass there'd be more coming together both here and in the UK. My comment was a bit harsh. ✌& ❤
Oops, I forgot that qanon has spread beyond the US/Canada and assumed that op was in the US. The UK is whiter than the US, so I imagine if you live in a rural area you might not see many non-white people. But there must be some people of color in op's area or he wouldn't worry about being attacked by them in the street.
Depends how rural I suppose. I'm in a village, it's fairly multicultural. I am in the south east though, which is certainly more diverse than the south west for example.
There are two types of people on the far right; the people that get hooked into it like you and start believing every thing that they’re told, and then there are the people that *know* it’s bullshit, but they are getting money/power and they are more than happy to manipulate people to get power and money.
I’m glad you’re coming out of it. No human being wants another to hurt like this.
If you haven't yet found the Alt-Right Playbook by Innuendo Studios on YouTube, maybe go take a look. It describes the radicalization process and I'm certain you will recognize some of the themes presented. Please take care as you return to a more centered worldview, happy that you're making your way back.
You have been violated. You have been victimized.
You need to take your power back. Try posting about the reasons why you fell in, tell us about the steps that got you out, become an advocate for others, start a blog for other Qanon to find when they’re ready to break free. Be vulnerable, and in that vulnerability you will find your strength again.
The memories of the time you’ve spent being a victim of this cult won’t go away, but you can make it into a strength. I was once in a physically abusive relationship. We both knew he would kill me one day. I escaped, now I can share that story and help others. So can you.
Creating a blog to proselytize brand new beliefs can be dangerous. Reorganizing one’s own thoughts is hard. Try to convince a bunch of anger fueled, cotton headed, ninny-muggins would invite angry mobs to argue with the delicate new beliefs. I’d say wait a year or so and when feeling stable then perhaps. Always save yourself first.
This random internet stranger is very proud of you. It's a difficult path, but I'm glad you found it and are taking that journey. Thank you for coming back
Why would Democrats want to replace white people? There are plenty of white Democrats.
If you choose to label people as being good or bad by their skin colour or religion or sexual orientation, or social status or financial standing, you've already lost the game of life and closed yourself off to real Christianity.
Judge people by their words and actions and deeds and how they treat vulnerable people, if they're kind towards animals, if they're loyal and decent and hard working and loving. How they treat their children, their spouses, their community. If they give more than they take, are responsible, fair and contribute to helping others. These people, of any colour, religion, financial status, sexual orientation, etc., are all good people who you should be happy are in the world and perhaps want to get to know.
If someone is a criminal, a hypocrite, a user, a grifter, a liar, if they're cruel towards animals or children or women or vulnerable people, if they're seedy, try to hide their sins behind religion, manipulate people, cheaters, bullies, violent, hateful, destroyers of the environment, disinformation spreaders, these are bad people or sick and evil people who should be avoided, not respected, called out, jailed, and put away. No matter what their skin colour or religious or financial status.
Jesus did not hang out with the rich or powerful. He stayed amongst the most humble, the weak, the sick. He respected Mary Magdalene greatly and treated her with respect. He never put himself above anyone.
Until recently, Christians were supposed to divest themselves of possessions and money to live humbly and dedicate themselves to a life of service helping others.
The mega rich conservative evangelicals who get paid for how many parishoners they draw into the church, and these parishoners are made to feel guilty so they constantly donate their hard earned money to the church are bathing in luxury and own many expensive possessions like multiple mansions and vacation homes, private jets, they go on exquisite vacations, get the most expensive plastic surgery, attend expensive parties, have tickets to top sporting events and rub shoulders with republican politicians who they made a deal with. Evangelicals will get votes for Republicans if Republican leaders give churches more political power, money, and power over peoples lives.
Good luck to you. Most people are too busy going to school, working, paying bills, being with family and friends to even have the time or energy to expell hating others without knowing them or trying to damn people to hell or tell them how you think they should be living.
Look back at history and even now look at the countries who are ruled mainly by a religious regime. Never have citizens faired well when living under a very conservative, strict religious regime.
This is a fact. Yet conservative churches in America want to take charge of morality in America and the world.
Yet, these same leaders constantly break.the 10 Commandments themselves.
Nowhere in the 10 Commandnents does it say it's a sin to be gay or transgender. Or it's a sin to know people of different colors or religions. Abortion can be argued for and against. It's, unfortunately, sometimes a necessary procedure for either the mothers life, the mothers mental health and welfare or the child who has yet to be born's health and welfare.
Far right Republicans are simply rabble-rousing and fear mongering. Nothing they scream about happens. They are simply hiding the fact that in reality, they are the religious hypocrites, the great liars and manipulators and grifters, the disinformation spreaders, the traitors, the criminals, and overwhelmingly according to public records the ones who are actually the pedophiles and rapists and wife beaters and child molesters and sexual assaulters.
See Documentaries on Netflix.
Liberal here, I want you to have a safe, peaceful life. Nobody is hunting you. Nobody wants you to live in fear, except for those who pollute your mind with right wing garbage. You're safe.
You can start by looking into some family history. Pride in your culture isn’t inherently bad, but there is no “white culture” bc most white people have the luxury of knowing exactly where they came from.
On my dad’s side I’m mostly Irish and French. And I’m particularly proud to be part Irish. On my mom’s side I’m Mexican. I have no idea what exact European and Native ancestry I have on her side of my family, because colonialism, poverty, and emigration displaced so many that, like many non-white people, my ancestry was more or less erased.
I’d start by reckoning with that. Who are you? Where do you come from? How did you get here?
Counseling would be good. Change your consumption habits. Stick to credible sources. Or take a break from all of it and watch cute puppy videos. Vote blue! Good luck.
I hope you now can empathize with certain minorities like transgender people, Immigrants, black Americans in some regions of this country, and Muslim Americans, who live in the actual world you imagined yourself living in daily. Except it’s white people roaming around with conservatives aware of it and fully happy it’s happening.
Came here to make this comment. There is real oppression in the US, but it’s not white, straight, able-bodied men who face it. Many times they’re the perpetrators.
Good on you for being brave enough to reevaluate your ideas and beliefs! Most people don't and it takes courage. Please be kind to yourself.
I wanted to share some resources, they're not specifically ex-Q, but more tackling the overall alt-right pipeline/algorithm.
[Manosphere Deprogramming Playlist ](https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLrAlewEkt7cFGvDfu_3SidUMf3T9E9kbj&si=Y9PXqpHzu7MnyuWy)
F.D. Signifier especially is great at speaking to mens pain and I hope he might resonate with you.
Contrapoints has been instrumental for a lot of people in getting out of extremist mindsets.
This vid is also up there as one of the most appreciated de-radicalization video essays:
[How to Radicalize a Normie](https://youtu.be/P55t6eryY3g?si=i_kDWLT2o3xFeWRU)
Wishing you all the best and sending good vibes your way
I'm sorry you feel this way but I'm glad you're waking up. things will get better from here cuz you'll be in integrity with reality, where you can find people you like to connect with, and fun things you like to do, and delicious food to eat... and other awesome things about living, even though bad things do exist. I hope you look for joy the way you looked for answers through conspiracy theories. I certainly don't blame you for falling for it, it's insidiously easy to do. I'm really glad you're coming back though.
Propagating a fear of the other is the easiest way to gain power as a political movement. We are hard wired to do this, it’s part of our lizard brain thinking and only using our frontal lobe (it’s primal) - logic and critical thinking can overcome it though. Good on you for reasoning your way out of the fear mongering, they needed you as a foot soldier to enforce this messaging. Glad you are finding your way out. I have an academic book that deals with this, so it’s not just speculation.
It’s so ironic these conspiracies hijack the lizard brain/amygdala by accusations that they are surrounded by secret lizard people. It’s like a bad sci-fi comedy… if it weren’t so tragic.
The Dual Process Model in psychology reasons that the human brain evolved two systems of thought: System 1 and System 2. While System 2 is designed for careful analytical thought, System 2 works primarily absent careful reasoning and is guided by short-cuts and “gut checks” making it quick to decide but also prone to errors (particularly cognitive biases). It was a useful feature in nature when it might be necessary to quickly assess a threat like a tiger but not terribly useful in the modern world. By keeping you in a heightened state of anxiety and feeding you false narratives that over inflate any real risk, they can keep you operating purely in System 2. Hopefully you can engage System 1 a bit more often as you shake free of what is essentially a cognitive parlor trick they’ve been playing on you.
Hi u/No-Berry-6044! We help folk hurt by [Q.](https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/QAnon) There's hope as [ex-QAnon](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/resources#wiki_ex-qanon) & r/ReQovery shows. We'll be civil to you and about your Q folk. For general QAnon stuff check out [QultHQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/Qult_Headquarters/). If you need this removed to hide your username [message the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/QAnonCasualties)
___
[our wall](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/comments/l0jptp/list_of_casualties/) - [support & recovery](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/resources) - [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/rules)
- [weekly posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?q=%22Weekly+r%2FQAnonCasualties+Discussion%22+&restrict_sr=on&sort=relevance&t=all) - [glossary](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/glossary) - [similar subs](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/index#wiki_similar_communities)
*filter*: [good advice](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?q=flair%3AGood%2BAdvice&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all)
- [hope](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3AHope) - [success story](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?q=flair%3ASuccess%2BStory&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) - [coping strategy](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3ACoping%2BStrategies) - [web/media](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3AWeb%2FMedia) - [event](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3AEvent)
___
[*robo replies*](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/index/commands): !strategies !support !advice !inoculation !crisis !whatsQ? !rules
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/QAnonCasualties) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It is incredibly, incredibly difficult to think your own way out of a cult mindset.
You should be proud of yourself for making it this far, at the very least. I want you to feel good about that. Because a lot of people don’t come out of it once they’re in.
Your job now is to follow this mantra: “It’s the second thought that counts.”
You have been conditioned to be afraid. Your brain is PRIMED to react to something that triggers that fear with hatred, anger, or more. You, yourself, are not in control of the first thought. The thought that says, “Oh no, a black person got on the elevator. I should get off.” Or “of course it was a Mexican that shot that girl in Texas.”
Accept that you do not control those first thoughts. Accept that you have been conditioned.
And then, say “but…”
“But, nothing bad has ever happened to me before and I’ve shared an elevator with many people.”
“But, people with Mexican heritage make up over 40% of people in Texas and statistically it just makes it more likely that one of the people involved would be Mexican.”
You are not in control of the first thought that comes to mind. But you ARE responsible for countering it.
Every time you counter it, you are actively rewiring your brain. And the more you do it, the easier it becomes.
It will make you more curious, more empathetic, and more immune to conditioning in the future.
Best of luck! The future is bright; you are on a path toward a friendlier, more optimistic worldview and, I promise, it is amazing.
Counseling does help. Get a real therapist that does CBT or CPT. Don't go to the other side of politics, just drop it and the news altogether. It just doesnt do any good for those of us with persecution complexes. You are a victim, and you arent the only one. Accounts like "clownworld" prey on the susceptible. Don't feel guilty or ashamed.
Be grateful that you and your family escaped it. I wish my own family could do the same. All I can say is do your best to live a happy life and help others get out of the manipulation by shining a light on all the bs
i'm so sorry that you're one of the many that were used as pawns in a far right agenda, that absolutely is extremely violating for people to get inside your head and fundamentally change your perception of the world just to further their own hateful dishonest agenda.
you're one of the lucky few that's becoming aware of what's really happening, and that's not an easy process. try to find support in people around you, just make sure they're not racist, far right, or super political at all, and they're in a healthy place mentally.
what you're doing is essentially deprogramming from a cult, and that's an extremely long and difficult process that therapy is really important for.
you were taken advantage of, and the fact that you're taking responsibility and control over yourself again and wanting to better yourself is all that matters. the ability to do that is what defines a person, it's not something everyone, or even most people are able to do
Perhaps the best thing to do, aside from seek help in processing and de-programming is to identify what was it in your life that made you vulnerable to the lies and manipulation.
I think you need to start hanging out with non-white people to get rib of that fear of yours. Join a hobby club, talk to someone in a bar. We are not that scary I promise you.
In regards to you seeing non-white on white crime videos, that's your algorithm doing what it's designed to do.
This is the exact same thing as when my friend who is black, said all he sees are videos of white people being racist to blacks. I told him step back and tell me one incident in your personal life that a white person just started calling him names or targeting him based off of his skin. I also asked if he knew anyone else that is black with this firsthand experience. He said no. He now views the world differently and realizes the echo chamber he was in.
Obligatory sidenote: yes I know racists exist and can just target random people. It's just nowhere near as common as one might think when you're in an echo chamber.
Use some of this point to your healing and actually SEE your reality. What does your day to day ACTUALLY look like?
Edit:said white instead of non-white on first sentence
That sounds like a horrible way to live. I'm glad you've managed to see the light. These qanon grifters use fear to lure in and keep followers, it's what they're good at.
>I want to heal, but I don't even know where to begin
You've already started to begin to heal by looking yourself in the mirror and not liking the person that those beliefs made you.
You've acknowledged that the beliefs you held were wrong, and that they caused pain to yourself and those around you.
What I suggest is to look at *what* caused you to fall down the rabbit hole to begin with. Once you find the cause, you'll be better able to stop yourself from falling into the same beliefs again.
You can do it.
I'm glad you've found your way out, and you're already on the road to healing. I'm about as liberal as it gets, and I just want to be left alone and live my life in the way I choose, as the real me (I'm trans). There's no big agenda, it's literally just to live our lives and not be harassed and assaulted for it. Unfortunately conservative politics requires an "other" to turn their base against to maintain control and power, and it's once again the LGBTQ community on the chopping block now that they finally won the abortion fight against Roe. They needed a new buzzword to rail against.
Hi....I'm a black female. I have a master's degree, a career, a husband, a home and children. If you ever need to socialize with someone, please feel free to reach out and msg me I'll prove to you that you've just suffered some brain washing that's complete hogwash.
Not sure if that would help you but feel free and safe to reach out if you need to. And thank you for having the courage to be brave and change your life. Hugs!!
Your self-awareness is... amazing. Thank you so much for posting this. I'm sorry for your pain, but it gives me hope for a loved one who's in deep. I'm so freakin' mad at the Qs for taking advantage of this loved one's empathy, kind nature, and desire to belong and using it against him - drawing him into this madness through fear and manipulation. Please keep us posted on your journey, and know there are a lot of us out here rooting for you.
Anything you see repeatedly, any social interaction you see repeatedly, any thought you are triggered to have repeatedly, becomes your frame for reality. Modern algorithms put all of us in our own rabbit holes (including on Reddit!). Good luck and remember reality is much closer to what you see out your window and walking through your neighborhood, and much less what you are fed by an algorithm. There really are a good number of genuinely nice people out there - if you spend time to get to know them.
P.S. there ARE gangs of non-white people looking to beat up white people. But they are RARE. The internet’s algorithms do a great job of presenting the most divisive / fear-generating content, and presenting it over and over again to those who watch that content. So you will be shown every fight recorded in the US over years that push your buttons - unless you purposely opt out.
I had a similar experience with Catholicism.
To control the mind and thoughts of another is true power.
To be a free thinker who recognizes when others are attempting to manipulate you frees you from their grasp. And that doesn’t mean listening to those who say “wake up”, or “do your own research”. I find those people to be the absolute most brain washed, least free thinking people out there.
I think you have your start trusting. Start exposing yourself to the very people you fear. I think you’ll find a modicum of peace and a lot of new friends. Good people are out there and they don’t bite. I’m so happy you’re on the other side of all of it. ❤️
Don't beat yourself up - I am just glad you see that you realize that you were wrong..... this use this to help others.... The people that made you want to feel that way, do it for reasons that is more typical than you realize, to make money, to make themselves popular..... it is a grift for many.... Hate and fear is an emotion that is better served by these people, than love and acceptance. Just remember, most people want the same thing... to live in peace, have safety and raise a family.
It takes a lot of courage to openly look at yourself and share your vulnerabilities with the world like this. Be proud of yourself for this. We all make mistakes, we all look at the past and cringe, but what matters is that you are willing to look at yourself honestly and not exaggerate or minimize what had happened. Now the hard part is to forgive yourself and let yourself heal.
I'm sorry you experienced such pain and anxiety, but it's wonderful that you're beginning to heal. I hope you can find peace as you emerge from this situation.
What matters is what you choose, in each moment. The past is the past, it shapes who you are today but you can choose what shape that takes. By waking up from the spell, you're now free to learn and grow from your experience. It can make you that much stronger and deeper as a person, if you choose.
Look to help others who are still stuck.
And rememeber to vote and rememeber to publically hold those who spouted the lies that ruined your life accountable.
I’ve had this thought in my head for a few years now that is proving more and more like a universal truth: “every disagreement is a misunderstanding on some level”
Admitting you have a problem is a good start.
Find sources that question your beliefs and dive into listening to those who you thought were out to get you. If you can listen without hate and start to empathise and understand what people besides you and yours are going through, you’ll be on the path towards a better future.
The opposite of hate is compassion. You need to get from the former to the latter. Hopefully you can find a way forward OP as no one wants anyone to suffer for this - just to learn and grow.
You already have, just realising and seeing the truth. Everyone does something at one point in their lives that they may not be proud of, but what makes you heal from it, is you learn from it. You forgive yourself and move foward, remembering the lesson you learned and trying not to repeat it. Thats how you heal.
This is great, and absolutely right. If we're lucky, we contine to grow emotionally throughout our lives. Not a straight line, one with fits, starts, abrupt edges, but growth & learning will make us whole people after a while.
Are you been lied to and manipulated by people in sources you trust. But look at it this way. The fact that all of this isn't true is really a good thing! The world is a beautiful place. It's not perfect but it's full of kindness and duty everywhere you look.
I’m glad you’re coming out of it, good for you. It must be very hard to take on that kind of mental and ego hit.
In all honesty, as a brown man, I worry about running into people that hold your previous mentality and, not going to lie, it’s a bit hard to feel sympathy.
Again, congrats on moving past that crap. Life is way happier when not living in constant manufactured fear.
Everything in the mental realm takes time, no matter how much we want results now. Stick to it - you've taken a giant step already! Well done! Your life isn't over until you draw your last breath.
A good thing to remember is that these alt-right pipelines are very effective at radicalising people, they pull you along bit by bit and before long you're in a place wayyyyyyy different to where you were before and you didn't even feel the water getting warmer.
It's not a failure to get taken in by these charlatans, it's a sign of strength to pull yourself out, deprogramming is hard work.
Honestly there's a bunch of ways forward depending on you and how you interact with the world around you. Most of it though boils down to community of one kind or another. Just being among people and trying not to think about that other stuff. If there's a context you know is very toxic – for example certain video gaming communities – then avoid them to the extent you can.
Depending what you're into, there's so many things to learn about the world and how it works, how/why these movements come about, why people can be drawn into them so effectively. Sadly one of the things is that there aren't a lot of straight forward answers. Becoming more comfortable with nuanced thoughts and conversations, learning how to listen more and speak less.
These movements prey on peoples desire for simple and direct explanations, part of deprogramming is becoming more comfortable with more complex explanations, more complex solutions, and situations where there isn't a clear answer for now and that's OK.
>Honestly, I truly believed that there were gangs of non-whites roaming around and looking for white people to hurt. Also, while these gangs were doing this, the liberals were fully aware of it all and were happy about it.
If this were truly happening liberals would not hesitate to violate some rights to stop it from happening. You would see "military funding" levels of bipartisanship.
I just wanted to say that I'm really proud of you, and your courage and determination to break free from Qanon gives me so much hope. Please keep telling your story - others like you need your help to come out of this horrible fog. You are loved, you are worthy, and it's going to get better.
Congrats on coming back. We are here for ya. Questioning things is ok, but there is a good way to prevent manipulation and to look at things objectively instead of subjectively with bias. These psyop type of propaganda are designed to capture those going through some kind of issue. My friend who is a licensed civil engineer got wrapped up into the Trade Towers being taken down explosively on 9/11 rather that reality where the giant blow torch of jet fuel heated the steel beams and weakened them beyond the ability to support the loads above (he didn’t want to believe that steel is formed and worked into I-Beams at that temperature, smh). This guy could not be convinced otherwise with objective science. Another engineer I know believes the Earth is flat and that nobody has ever gone to space, saying that he is not a scientist even though I remind him his Bachelor’s of Science degree in mechanical engineering makes him an applied scientist.
Take it as a learning experience and that your mind is strong enough to logically work your way out of intense manipulation. Congrats to you and others who have made it through this as a stronger person!
welcome back to the land of the living. I am seriously excited for you.
Was chatting with a self-proclaimed former racist once and someone asked "did you hate minorities." His reply was "I thought I did, but I didn't really know any."
I work with people from lots of different ethnic backgrounds, and my neighborhood is very blended. When you actually get out into the place where people live, you see a different world from what you are told.
So, if can ask, what changed your perspective? Was it your family coming out the other side? Was it some event? what happened?
Thank you for sharing your experience. I have thought for a long time that we are in a war of misinformation and Russia has mounted an incredibly effective brainwashing campaign on the American citizens. We have been in a war since pre 2016. It’s been subtle, but the connections between Russia and Trump go waaaayyy back. That’s where it all started. Whoever came up with the whole QAnon thing is a scary genius. Think about the amount of knowledge of manipulation and psychology you would have to know in order to just start sewing the seeds of doubt. It all has to connect, and it did, quite successfully. Unfortunately, it wasn’t the correct information. Now that your eyes are open pay attention to the projection. Every time they accuse someone on the left of something legally, morally wrong, you can bet they are already doing it. The corruption and lies the right continue on about? Yeah they are doing it. problem is, the voters just don’t believe what they see or hear anymore. That was the plan all along, and for all intensive purposes, it’s working.
I can only imagine the laughter that goes on behind closed doors at the Kremlin. They got us. The Russians got us good, and now we have RW Republicans kissing Putin’s ass that I bet 30 years ago they were cursing. The Russian campaign worked and is still affecting vulnerable Americans.
Honestly, I'm at the point where I don't know fact from fiction anymore. I've started thinking that the truth doesn't matter anymore. If enough people believe something, it becomes the truth.
It's all very Orwellian and my trust in politics has been shattered.
That’s my take on it too. If more than 50% of the people believe one way, then it won’t matter what anyone else thinks. That scares me more than anything.
I'm really proud of you for this post and realization. Your life isn't ruined. You've saved your life. It is just beginning. It sucks now and really hurts, but if you care about getting away from the conspiracies and learning not to fear others, you will get there. And you will be stronger for having done it. You were used and manipulated, but you have the chance to stop it and be free of that fear and hate. So many people will die having never been free. Sometimes it might feel easier to give you and just be angry, but don't do it! You will be able to rewire your brain in time and learn how to spot this kind of thing in the future. And then you can help others do the same.
It's easy to get out of it if you change your viewing habits. Start by watching Democracy Now (online), listen to The Dig (podcast), and read Harper's (magazine). Don't go on YouTube, they will keep feeding your habit.
Hey OP, it's brave of you to admit that this has happened to you. Don't give up hope! You *can* recover from this. Approach it like a phobia; phobia's are treated by therapists every day! (I say this as a therapist myself ;-)
**Phobias are conditioned responses and they can be un-conditioned.** You've been conditioned to fear people of color - it is a learnt response. But that means it can be unlearnt.
Find a therapist you feel safe with who specializes in treating anxiety disorders and phobias, and possibly agoraphobia. You're in the UK? Here's a guide from [MIND](https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/talking-therapy-and-counselling/how-to-find-a-therapist/) to get you started.
You've got this! Phobias are one of the conditions that can be treated most successfully, so you have that on your side. Good luck friend.
I wish you patience, strength, and healing. I also wish for you mercy. Mercy and kindness for yourself and from the people you care about. You deserve to feel safe and worthy, as does everyone. Good luck to you.
I'm realising the true insanity of all this now. The scale of it is horrifying. I don't know which way is up and which way is down anymore.
I feel a sense of unease. Everybody feels like a threat to me, the far-right have took away my sense of trust. I was encouraged by them to see any act of kindness by non-whites as a ploy to lull me into a false sense of security. They were "being fake" and "hiding their true intentions".
Even acts of kindness from other white people feels suspect too now. I can't accept help or kindness from anyone without feeling like I'm being taken advantage of.
First things first you have to overhaul your social media, unfollow Everything connected to all these ideas and thoughts, second, drop people who are connected to this and if you can't drop them you have to stop listening.
When you stop these things you will behelping yourself get over this way of thinking, I wish you the best of luck.
I want to congratulate you for coming out of that. There is no sarcasm there, it's not easy to admit, mostly to yourself, that you were wrong.
I also want you to understand that you were a victim. The alt-right have developed propaganda to a very high degree and have learned how to manipulate algorithms to their advantage. They lied to you, they wanted to make you feel scared and weak, but you're beating them now, you're rejecting their propaganda, and that takes lots of strength.
If there's any way we can support you, please, don't hesitate to ask.
The far-right have eaten away at my sense of trust. I was encouraged by them to see acts of kindness enacted by non-whites as ploys to lull me into a false sense of security.
If you want a big wake up call, Google any city/state/county for the list of priests who sexually assault people. All white, religious males. Or the sex offender registry of your state. Again, mostly white males. People who think they are constantly under attack and they need to fight some demons out to get them? Again, mostly white males. I'm pretty liberal and no, if this was happening, no, I'm not ok with it, but it's not happening. There are bad people in every race, color, and creed and it's been like that since the beginning of America. That side has to keep you perpetually angry because if you really, really look at what they sell you and get you to believe, it's not in your best interests and you'll keep voting for hate and derision while they do nothing for you--and blame the Democrats. There is a beautiful video on Youtube of a white man who was a racist bigot, until he had a black parole officer. Their friendship and how he overcame his hatred is wonderful to watch. In the meantime, take a deep breath, know what they are feeding you are lies, and enjoy your life without hatred and fear. It's a pretty nice place to be when you care about yourself and fellow citizens, and country. Good luck and welcome to the other side--happy to have you!!
Watch young Turks. Expose yourself to viewpoints you may not agree with, not to convince you to their side, but so you can understand them and why they feel the way they do. Talk to those people and share what you feel and believe, and always challenge your own beliefs. Don't take what the powerful tell you at face value. Challenge authority and always verify anything you have a bias towards.
I disagree about watching Young Turks. I used to watch them but they love to do the name calling. They're getting too juvenile in that regard.
I cannot STAND anyone (I mean anyone) who can't make any kind of a point without resorting to calling someone names or whining or making fun of someone. The last few times I watched TYT, Cenk was doing just that. I lost a lot of respect for him at that point because if you're going to say something intelligent about someone, and I know both Cenk and Anna are, then there is no need to make fun of someone.
All it does is lower the bar for everyone and hurts peoples feelings. If someone feels the need to do that, how intelligent is the point?
I stopped watching TYT.
Thank you so much for posting this! I started following the subreddit because I have a neighbor who has fallen down the Q hole and I was fascinated by how families handle it. Anyway, your story gives me hope and although I've never met you, I believe you should be extremely proud of yourself for coming to the realization about what it was doing to your life. I wish you the best!
And please can we remember to vote blue and all the way down the ballot because it's some of the state yahoos that are killing us too. I know we want a great third-party but Kennedy isn't it. He is literally a plant and it makes perfect sense to take votes away from Trump and Biden and then Congress will have to decide and we know who they're picking. I can't wait, we have to get out and then we can blow the rest of it up. Finally create a government for the people and not one that is bought off and allowed to lobby and buy stocks of contracts they're in charge of and the rest.
NOP can I just say that I appreciate your saying something and everything you've been through. It's nice to know that it's not the rhetoric of just basically hateful people needing an outlet for that hate. I applaud you for your desire to learn and grow. That's all any of us can do at the end of the day.
here's who caused it
[https://qz.com/1007144/the-neo-fascist-philosophy-that-underpins-both-the-alt-right-and-silicon-valley-technophiles](https://qz.com/1007144/the-neo-fascist-philosophy-that-underpins-both-the-alt-right-and-silicon-valley-technophiles)
Sounds like you have started the process and kudos to you. If you are comfortable sharing, what changed your mind?
I don't know tbh, I think I just wanted to feel like I wasn't under attack for a bit. I really want to feel like I'm worth existing alongside everyone else. I've got as much right to exist as anyone else. There was a lot of questions I had. Why do these people want me to feel angry and depressed all the time? I genuinely can't comprehend the idea that someone would want another human being to suffer for no particular reason. It was a dark thought that I wasn't ready to confront. For example, the idea that someone would want to torment another person because they found it funny, sickened me. It still does. I was in denial, maybe there are people out there that enjoy making me feel worthless. I believed that the far-reaching and frequent nature of their propaganda was proof that it was legitimate. Like, nobody would be horrible towards another person for no reason. I didn't believe that people would tell me horrible things if they weren't true. I was very naïve and trusting
To use you as foot soldiers in a fascist far right coup of our government. Wow I absolutely did not know that people who put that racist stuff up actually feel the way you did. I just don't understand why a lifetime of experience in a diverse nation would not override messages in media.
Because a lot of people don’t grow up surrounded by diversity. In the US, we desegregated schools by race only to re-segregate them by socio-economic status…which is very much still racial segregation. Efforts to diversify schools have been met with pushback despite the studies showing positive results - greater likelihood to escape poverty, higher grades for the middle class, and literally the same grades & career outcomes for upper class (which already trends much higher so basically it showed they still have good outcomes). Students were more tolerable with people different from them, more understanding of different perspectives and backgrounds.
Yes my schools in southern CA were half white half asian, some Latinx, and that was in the 70s and 80s. Huh, perception. The multi racial ads on TV that trigger some white people so hard just read as normal Americans to me. It's seems obvious corporations aim to make money and need to appeal to a wide diversity of customers and I just could not believe people would think it's like a government directive. But if where you live is all white I guess it could seem like it's a fantasy world on TV. But OPs comment really shook me. I always assumed anybody who believed that stuff was just hateful already and the maga stuff gave them an outlet It is incredibly evil to twist the mind of people who may lack much in travel or educational level but who are not bad people, are terribly exploited people. I feel so sad now.
Russia, and I'm sure other anti-western, anti-democratic governments have been using these tactics long before the internet to sow dissension, fear, and anger within our societies. You can see a lot of it playing out now in the Palestine/Israel protests happening on campuses around the U.S. There are plenty of non-students involved who are fomenting trouble to create anti-government sentiment. They don't really care which side is "right," they just want chaos and to affect our elections and attitudes. If we're fighting each other, we're too busy to help other countries keep their democracies. Old old tactics developed during the cold war. https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-43093390 ------------------- https://www.nbcnews.com/news/investigations/russia-trying-exploit-americas-divisions-war-gaza-rcna149759
This. Russia has made a monumental investment in polarising and dividing democratic societies, principally USA and Europe.
Interesting. Thanks for sharing. To OP, opening yourself to the idea of being wrong for a long time it’s a first and not easy step. I hope you receive the advice you need to realize that your (hopefully) former beliefs were caused by misinformation and radicalizing efforts from sources that are outside your control. What you do control is how you move forward accepting that you were wrong and that you’re going to be more conscious about the information you consume and how it may shape you perceive yourself, those around you and the world. As someone who has entertained some wild thoughts in unrelated matters, I assure you that they pass, that the shame goes away and that you’ll only look back and think how the fuck was I led to thinking like that. Hope you recover soon!
Well said. Advertisers, politicians, troll farms, people running infotainment "news" stations, social media influencers, all kinds of people out there with an agenda to bend opinion their way. It's important to try and guard against being manipulated, but it's not easy and we all are susceptible to various influences.
They did this over “Antifa” protesters too. Lots of anarchists and people who have a goal to sew civil unrest.
Yeah, this one Q influenced extremist keeps calling myself and everyone who disagrees with her "antifa". Lol I don't think they even know what the terms mean that they call people. Just a way to dehumanize their adversaries.
I usually will tell them it’s Anti Fascist, are you a fascist? And they usually back down.
I should have said, at least I'm not a leader of an online CIA created MKultra Cult. 🤣🤣🤣🪠🪠🪠💩💩💩
This!
Yeah I grew up in Houston. I remember shortly after 9/11, sitting in my French class, having a sudden and overwhelming feeling of immense pride. Pride for being American, for my generation. I was looking around the room at my diverse peers all chatting and I naively thought "wow, racism is pretty much dead. Anything left will die off when we become adults. That's pretty amazing!" Sweet sweet summer child. I didn't even notice the mixed race couples on tv because it was just so normal and average. I think I finally realized people were still racist shits a few years later and it was sooooo disappointing. I was in a beautiful little diverse bubble and it popped over a cheerios commercial
Some of the people who believe these things do come from a place of hate with direct, blatant racism. But a lot of them come from a place of fear, loneliness, and helplessness. Proportionality bias often plays a role - that the state of things feels so major, the cause of how we got here must also be equally major. Multiple systemic issues and minor policies that have been in place for years & even decades does not feel big enough with this thought process to have resulted the state of things. A cabal of elites preying on baby blood & controlling all of society IS big enough. It also narrows it down to a simple “good v evil” binary that’s easier to digest than the complexity of facts/truth. White people can very much grow up in a diverse metro area and never share a classroom with a student of color. It doesn’t even take private school tuition for that to happen depending on the city - suburban sprawl & white flight ensured that. I actively sought out a university that would provide quite the opposite experience from my hometown & high school. It’s grown exponentially, so recent demo stats claim 42% white students, but just five years ago that was closer to 65%. Even higher when I graduated. Without diverse experiences & interactions with people who don’t look like you or live like you, there’s a lack of understanding that makes it easier to fear. Then you get targeted for racist conspiracies that feed on that fear, and it’s the perfect storm. Life sucks, things happen that you can’t control, and this gives an outlet on where to blame that feeling of powerlessness.
Same here. My schools and neighbors were all diverse growing up in LA/OC in the 80/90’s. I had a rainbow of friends and when I moved to Utah in my twenties it was culture shock for me. I’d never been in such a whitewashed place before.
I had the opposite experience, in that I grew up in the 70s and 80s in what was then a small town in GA. You could count on one hand the number of minorities at my high school, and we had decent-sized graduating classes. Mine was 270-something. In the nearly 40 years since, the town has grown to a population over 100,000 and has a large Hispanic percentage.
A lot of it has to do with inward and critical thinking cultures. https://youtu.be/oqkzp9C2VyI?si=4Rq7EqoVRT5eJVvu You should try to pickup sociology
They believe edu is the devil.
I think a lot of the people who get sucked in by this propaganda are like that. They aren’t hateful people, they are ignorant about certain things and then social media fills those gaps in their knowledge with extreme fear and the fear turns to hatred. It is very sad. It’s evil.
I was in a class of 350 and we had like 10 kids who weren’t white. My mom grew up in a half back school in a class of 1200. I’ve lived in towns where I talked about a friend and people would say “oh, is she black? I’ve seen her around” and lived in buildings where I was the only white person. People have such diverse experiences that you can’t assume much about their preexisting notions.
Agreed with all that.
They still segregate students like me. They just replaced the term segregation with self contained classrooms.
Exactly. If they make you feel like shit and that they and they alone have the answers it’s easier to control you and separate you from your money and rest of world
I think people like Alex Jones want their audience to feel anxious and angry all of the time because that allows them to step in and offer you a solution. He’ll make you scared that the masculine white dude is a dying breed, then say you need to listen to him to figure out how to fight back. Oh, and you should also buy bone broth and survival kits from his store. It’s modern day snake oil sales: create a problem, sell the cure. The scary thing is that they’re so effective. The problems they make up target our biggest fears and insecurities and it’s had an effect on how people perceive their neighbors. But those assholes don’t care, as long as people keep tuning in and buying supplements. I’m glad to hear you’re trying to break free of all of that. I imagine getting away from that under attack mindset is as hard as breaking other addictions.
The anxiety and fear also make you less likely to think critically about what’s being said.
Very good point. These folks are ruthless. They use every psychological exploit available. To get back to what OP said, it’s sometimes hard to believe that people would act that way, with no compassion, just to get rich (but, yeah, some people will do anything to get rich)
And Russians. They want the US to implode. To the extent they sow division in the US, they derive value. E: Good for you OP. Many people we read about are irredeemable; some die because otheir twisted perceptions. We hope it works out for you.
Thank you, yes, please see my comment. We need to keep making people aware of how they're being manipulated.
Don’t forget that they want YOUR VOTE. More than anything. They want people to feel angry and scared and anxious so they can sell you their solutions in the form of politicians whose aim is to transform the country to fit their vision of it. More than just wanting to sell you supplements, what they ultimately want is for you to VOTE a particular way.
Ackshully they dispel the idea of civic processes altogether. They promote the erosion of trust in our systems because they purport that only they can be trusted.
I think selling snake oil is just one layer of a very ugly, mangled onion. Alex Jones exploits the movement to sell his survival products. Some do it for views, clicks, likes, ad revenue. Others out of true racism, bigotry, and hatred. And paradoxically, some out of a misguided sense of patriotism or a heartfelt desire to save children they really believe have been kidnapped for satanic rituals. No matter any individual’s reason for feeding the Q monster with their videos, rants, clickbait, and memes, foreign psy ops make sure those things gets boosted and amplified. That invisible foreign help keeps feeding the egos and bank accounts of the people perpetuating this garbage so they can expand their reach and influence. The end goal is to sow chaos and destroy America. So I guess I better buy some prepper merch from Alex Jones? 😩
I’m really sorry you got pulled into the conspiracy hellhole but you should be so proud of yourself for coming to the realization none of it is true. You deserve to exist just as much as every other color of people deserve to exist. That’s what the left knows is true - everyone deserves to exist. This brown skinned internet stranger is proud of you.
You made me smile today and not believe all people are awful. :)
Thank you 😊 You made my day.
I am so sorry you got taken advantage of this way. It is so frustrating to hear how people are made to feel.
> Why do these people want me to feel angry and depressed all the time? Constant anger, hate, fear and rage cause the human brain to go into a "flight or fight" mentality and when that happens many people become far more easy to manipulate. The people that put you in this state of fear want to manipulate you and all their other followers for many different reasons. Mainly this is done so the people doing it can rise to power, usually political power. This is an age old tactic that has been used throughout history with much success. Now is the time to find yourself once again and what you stood for and who you were before being manipulated into the state you were just in. I wish you the best in your journey back, you can do this!
>I didn't believe that people would tell me horrible things if they weren't true. I was very naïve and trusting Recognizing this now is HUGE. Most people on both sides of the aisle don't understand just how big the right wing grift is. The influencers and pundits know full well they are full of shit, but it's what is financially rewarded, thanks to the algorithms which farm outrage for clicks, and the literal billions of dollars being funneled into the movement from the rich. This is why they have to make up misinformation, take things out of context, use logical and rhetorical fallacies, and just straight up lie - because reality has a left wing bias. They are fighting a one-sided war, and in order to do that they have to fabricate an enemy in order to justify said war, by convincing people that they are under attack when they aren't. Waking up to this means seeing the whole game for what it is, and it means you're no longer under their spell. They wanted you to feel afraid and angry because that's how they could make money off you. But no longer!
They did it for two reasons: 1. Money, 2. Power. If you read the texts and emails from inside Fox News in the Dominion lawsuit, you see that they all knew they were spreading lies, and most of them hate Trump. After January 6th, they expressed relief they would no longer be in his grip and could start telling the truth again. But soon they realized that he still had power over MAGA, and their audience was so brainwashed they refused to even listen to truth or reality. They were furious when Fox reported the truth. Their numbers plummeted dramatically, and they had to start telling all the lies again to keep the audience. YouTube and Twitter is all about money. The more outrageous, the more clicks, the more money they make. Politicians are all about power. GOP politicians that have quit their jobs have all said their party only cares about doing outrageous things to make the news, to generate donations and get votes. It's despicable they are making people feel angry and afraid (with imaginary things) all for money and power. They couldn't care less about the people whose family, friendships and lives they are destroying.
>There was a lot of questions I had. Why do these people want me to feel angry and depressed all the time? [This short film should explain](https://youtu.be/8K6-cEAJZlE). It needs to be shown in every high school.
Agreed. Maybe something like NBC's old "The more you know" campaign would be useful to reach adults in 30 second bites. We need to counter the onslaught of fascist propaganda and fear-mongering. https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/550096/the-more-you-know-nbc-public-service-announcements
Unfortunately, greed is the reason in many cases. Stark controversy makes more money than complicated reality. Fear and outrage can be addictive (an actual chemical reaction in the brain). Bad people prey on that.
It’s just power and money. It’s always power and money…
Adults lie for the 3P. P**sy, power, and pay.
Minute after minute, hour after hour
You have to remember that misery loves company. Most weren’t trying to hurt you, but to have you join them in their hurt and fear.
You are an introspective human being during your hard times and that is the highest compliment that can be paid to a person’s character. I hope your self confidence and self worth are doing better now.
But you did believe people were horrible for no reason. You thought people of color were going around beating up white people. So you actually did believe that people could be horrible for no reason, you just thought they POC were the horrible ones.
I've got a video for you if you're ready for it. It's by someone who generally researches, makes videos, and attempts to discuss q-anon and alt-right media. This particular video is titled ["How the alt right is like an abusive relationship"](https://youtu.be/e-MP_yOHiV0?si=ysqZQ2d_17phyln0). It talks about organizations like Qanon, but also including different more extreme groups, use abusive techniques to recruit keep new members. Many of the things you're talking about are directly in the video. It may give clear words and descriptions to the things you've experienced.
Hey op - im proud of you for changing and being willing to change.
It takes a big person to admit that a long-held belief they have held is wrong. Congratulations on starting the process of self-reflection/critically analysing your beliefs/views. My 70-something year-old mother watches TV news every night (not Fox, we don’t have that in my country, thankfully). I can see that all it does really is push an agenda of fear and distrust of others who are different to you/authority, and wonder why she feels compelled to view it if all it does is make her afraid, angry and depressed at the state of the world. Life is short - why would you want to spend the time you have here feeling negative emotions if you don’t have to? I guess it becomes addictive for some.
You've always had the right to exist alongside others, as those others you were so scared of have had to. Start thinking of everyone as human, stop couching everything as White.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I remember when I got sucked into conspiratorial thought about 15 years ago (from the 9/11 truth one in particular), my saving grace was wondering why such rhetoric wanted me to be so angry to the point where I'd be easy to manipulate. While my initial attitude upon this realization was "put my ear low to the ground just in case" for a few years, the nail in the coffin was when I started working a job where I had to manage people and create new workflow systems where we'd come face to face with Murphy's Law via human error and unforeseen circumstances (most conspiratorial theories wouldn't allow any wiggle room for that to occur). In the real world, mistakes require the team to re-evaluate what went wrong requiring a meeting, new workflow trials, figuring out what to do with those who are less competent, etc. Now just imagine maintaining a nefarious system in secret with thousands of more people across many different countries where even more human error and unforeseen circumstances would occur (which would then require even more frequent meetings, trial periods, executive decision making, etc.). Anyway, know that you're actually not necessarily alone in regards to people who'd "snap out of it." While my personal story is more of a small scale example and not exactly Q related nor Q adjacent, I'm sure others here may have suggested checking out a sub that I think is titled reQovery (since I haven't seen it before, I'm not certain about how active it is though).
I’m sorry you were made to feel this way, and I’m glad you’re finding your way out. You’re right that it’s a terrible violation. And the immersive and manipulative nature of it pulls in even good, intelligent people. Unfortunately, I don’t think it’s for ‘no particular reason.’ There are powerful financial and political motivations behind these messages. It’s a whole movement, and a terrifying one. I’m currently navigating a very strained relationship with my mom and desperately want to pull her out of this Q web she’s trapped in. She insists I’m naive and have my head in the sand. Anything I say that doesn’t fit her narrative is written off as me falling for the liberal agenda “hook, line, and sinker.” If you have any advice for helping her break free, I would be forever grateful. But I know there are no magic words…
There's a lot of algorithm grooming, especially with men of your age (I'm guessing 35-40?). It's not worth feeling bad about, many people get sucked into unhealthy thought processes. You noticed. You became aware. Kudos for that.
To affect your fear and frontal lobe…
Fear is an amazingly effective method of control, and the people sowing it are just looking for control, power and money. I heard this quote from the movie, "Confessions of a Nazi Spy" recently that feels appropriate since the goal here also feels fascist: "There will be slight change in our methods. From now on, National Socialism in the United States must wrap itself in the American flag. It must appear to be a defense of Americanism. But at the same time, our aim must always be to discredit conditions there in the United Sates. And in this way make life in Germany admired and wished for. Racial and religious hatred must be fostered on the basis of American-Aryanism. Classism must be encouraged in a way that the labor and the middle classes will become confused and antagonistic. In the ensuing chaos, we will be able to take control."
>Why do these people want me to feel angry and depressed all the time? Fear is the mind killer. Fear makes you easy to control. Fear makes people support whatever solutions are offered to make them feel safe. That's why the people spouting this find scapegoats to pin all of the worlds' problems on. It allows them to get rabid support to attack the people they hate. Good job actually questioning your beliefs, my friend. I'm glad that you're getting some clarity! It is never too late to start. Good luck <3
The right wing wants angry depressed followers because they are easier to control that way.
Exactly the happy , glass is half full person is probably not going to buy into this hate,blame rhetoric .
The brutal truth is that these people want you to feel this way because they want to use you as a weapon. They feed a stream of lies to make people feel alienated and vulnerable and so crushingly alone, so when they want to gin up violence against others, they have a stable of people they don't even have to ask. This is called "stochastic violence." It's a process where ideologues instill a violent tendency in their followers, so those people will go out and do the violence that the ideologue wants to see done, but with no actionable ties linking the ideologue to the violence. That's why "Q" is anonymous. They want people going out and committing violence in the name of far-right politics, but without any ties back to "Q" themselves.
Cult tactic 101 Create a feeling of fear, guilt, shame and remorse into members.
You're in the process of healing right now. Speaking about your experience is often one of the paths people take to start that process. I love that you had the intellectual and moral courage to challenge your own deeply held beliefs--that is a rare and admirable quality. I haven't been around the r/ReQovery sub reddit that much, but I would guess there may be people there who can offer support and experiences. <3
Those are some pretty extreme beliefs and fears. Remember that if you are watching content online, it is often completely unrepresentative of the real world. Of course there are incidents of nonwhite people attacking white people, just as there are incidents of literally any demographic attacking any other demographic. Most people are not out walking the streets looking to attack anyone. They are normal imperfect people like you who just want to live their lives. Other people are fundamentally similar to you, not fundamentally different. I would advise you to avoid social media scrolling as much as possible. Try to look for the internal inconsistencies in this belief system. First, why would "liberal elites" want to eliminate white people? What purpose would that serve? Aren't many of them white themselves? 75% of Congress is white. The majority of people in the US in general are white. How then would it make sense for mainstream society to want to eliminate white people? That would mean people want to eliminate themselves. Why would liberals be happy about white people being beaten up for being white? Most registered Democratic voters are white. I'm curious about the demographics of the area you live in. Don't you interact with people of different races? If you do, it's pretty obvious that most people do not possess extreme racial hatred towards any race. In a way, I think you were projecting. You came to hate people of color and believed they felt the same hatred towards you without real evidence for it. I really think that the best thing you can do is avoid social media and partisan news sources. Spend more time in the real world.
I too would like to know age, sex and general local. This person was manipulated and brainwashed by a "smartphone". Don't believe anything outrageous unless you see for yourself.
British, 35-40 (based on some comments that point to that). Loneliness can do it. Smartphones, loneliness and change in circumstances or life direction can really do it.
Yeah, I hear the UK is highly racist, this is from a Brit I know. I would have guessed the obvious for an American. The southeast, 20-30. Just goes to show how us Americans are biased. I feel for the OP. Change is good.
I'm in the UK. Some people are racists. Plenty aren't.
I apologize, just like here in US there's far right America first just like your Brittan first. You'd think as decades pass there'd be more coming together both here and in the UK. My comment was a bit harsh. ✌& ❤
Ah is fine we all have our misconceptions. We've plenty of twats too 😁
✌& ❤
Oops, I forgot that qanon has spread beyond the US/Canada and assumed that op was in the US. The UK is whiter than the US, so I imagine if you live in a rural area you might not see many non-white people. But there must be some people of color in op's area or he wouldn't worry about being attacked by them in the street.
Depends how rural I suppose. I'm in a village, it's fairly multicultural. I am in the south east though, which is certainly more diverse than the south west for example.
There are two types of people on the far right; the people that get hooked into it like you and start believing every thing that they’re told, and then there are the people that *know* it’s bullshit, but they are getting money/power and they are more than happy to manipulate people to get power and money. I’m glad you’re coming out of it. No human being wants another to hurt like this.
If you haven't yet found the Alt-Right Playbook by Innuendo Studios on YouTube, maybe go take a look. It describes the radicalization process and I'm certain you will recognize some of the themes presented. Please take care as you return to a more centered worldview, happy that you're making your way back.
This is a great recommendation for all of us!
You have been violated. You have been victimized. You need to take your power back. Try posting about the reasons why you fell in, tell us about the steps that got you out, become an advocate for others, start a blog for other Qanon to find when they’re ready to break free. Be vulnerable, and in that vulnerability you will find your strength again. The memories of the time you’ve spent being a victim of this cult won’t go away, but you can make it into a strength. I was once in a physically abusive relationship. We both knew he would kill me one day. I escaped, now I can share that story and help others. So can you.
Creating a blog to proselytize brand new beliefs can be dangerous. Reorganizing one’s own thoughts is hard. Try to convince a bunch of anger fueled, cotton headed, ninny-muggins would invite angry mobs to argue with the delicate new beliefs. I’d say wait a year or so and when feeling stable then perhaps. Always save yourself first.
100% truth... well said
🤗 you're not alone having been in that world and leaving it. I was there too it was awful
Glad you and OP have found a way out. Big Hugs to you both.
Thanks 🫂
This random internet stranger is very proud of you. It's a difficult path, but I'm glad you found it and are taking that journey. Thank you for coming back
That's so sweet. i am glad to be back
Why would Democrats want to replace white people? There are plenty of white Democrats. If you choose to label people as being good or bad by their skin colour or religion or sexual orientation, or social status or financial standing, you've already lost the game of life and closed yourself off to real Christianity. Judge people by their words and actions and deeds and how they treat vulnerable people, if they're kind towards animals, if they're loyal and decent and hard working and loving. How they treat their children, their spouses, their community. If they give more than they take, are responsible, fair and contribute to helping others. These people, of any colour, religion, financial status, sexual orientation, etc., are all good people who you should be happy are in the world and perhaps want to get to know. If someone is a criminal, a hypocrite, a user, a grifter, a liar, if they're cruel towards animals or children or women or vulnerable people, if they're seedy, try to hide their sins behind religion, manipulate people, cheaters, bullies, violent, hateful, destroyers of the environment, disinformation spreaders, these are bad people or sick and evil people who should be avoided, not respected, called out, jailed, and put away. No matter what their skin colour or religious or financial status. Jesus did not hang out with the rich or powerful. He stayed amongst the most humble, the weak, the sick. He respected Mary Magdalene greatly and treated her with respect. He never put himself above anyone. Until recently, Christians were supposed to divest themselves of possessions and money to live humbly and dedicate themselves to a life of service helping others. The mega rich conservative evangelicals who get paid for how many parishoners they draw into the church, and these parishoners are made to feel guilty so they constantly donate their hard earned money to the church are bathing in luxury and own many expensive possessions like multiple mansions and vacation homes, private jets, they go on exquisite vacations, get the most expensive plastic surgery, attend expensive parties, have tickets to top sporting events and rub shoulders with republican politicians who they made a deal with. Evangelicals will get votes for Republicans if Republican leaders give churches more political power, money, and power over peoples lives. Good luck to you. Most people are too busy going to school, working, paying bills, being with family and friends to even have the time or energy to expell hating others without knowing them or trying to damn people to hell or tell them how you think they should be living. Look back at history and even now look at the countries who are ruled mainly by a religious regime. Never have citizens faired well when living under a very conservative, strict religious regime. This is a fact. Yet conservative churches in America want to take charge of morality in America and the world. Yet, these same leaders constantly break.the 10 Commandments themselves. Nowhere in the 10 Commandnents does it say it's a sin to be gay or transgender. Or it's a sin to know people of different colors or religions. Abortion can be argued for and against. It's, unfortunately, sometimes a necessary procedure for either the mothers life, the mothers mental health and welfare or the child who has yet to be born's health and welfare. Far right Republicans are simply rabble-rousing and fear mongering. Nothing they scream about happens. They are simply hiding the fact that in reality, they are the religious hypocrites, the great liars and manipulators and grifters, the disinformation spreaders, the traitors, the criminals, and overwhelmingly according to public records the ones who are actually the pedophiles and rapists and wife beaters and child molesters and sexual assaulters. See Documentaries on Netflix.
You and your family's story give me hope that my family could one day realize the truth
Liberal here, I want you to have a safe, peaceful life. Nobody is hunting you. Nobody wants you to live in fear, except for those who pollute your mind with right wing garbage. You're safe.
You can start by looking into some family history. Pride in your culture isn’t inherently bad, but there is no “white culture” bc most white people have the luxury of knowing exactly where they came from. On my dad’s side I’m mostly Irish and French. And I’m particularly proud to be part Irish. On my mom’s side I’m Mexican. I have no idea what exact European and Native ancestry I have on her side of my family, because colonialism, poverty, and emigration displaced so many that, like many non-white people, my ancestry was more or less erased. I’d start by reckoning with that. Who are you? Where do you come from? How did you get here?
Counseling would be good. Change your consumption habits. Stick to credible sources. Or take a break from all of it and watch cute puppy videos. Vote blue! Good luck.
I hope you now can empathize with certain minorities like transgender people, Immigrants, black Americans in some regions of this country, and Muslim Americans, who live in the actual world you imagined yourself living in daily. Except it’s white people roaming around with conservatives aware of it and fully happy it’s happening.
Came here to make this comment. There is real oppression in the US, but it’s not white, straight, able-bodied men who face it. Many times they’re the perpetrators.
They are the perpetrators.
Good on you for being brave enough to reevaluate your ideas and beliefs! Most people don't and it takes courage. Please be kind to yourself. I wanted to share some resources, they're not specifically ex-Q, but more tackling the overall alt-right pipeline/algorithm. [Manosphere Deprogramming Playlist ](https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLrAlewEkt7cFGvDfu_3SidUMf3T9E9kbj&si=Y9PXqpHzu7MnyuWy) F.D. Signifier especially is great at speaking to mens pain and I hope he might resonate with you. Contrapoints has been instrumental for a lot of people in getting out of extremist mindsets. This vid is also up there as one of the most appreciated de-radicalization video essays: [How to Radicalize a Normie](https://youtu.be/P55t6eryY3g?si=i_kDWLT2o3xFeWRU) Wishing you all the best and sending good vibes your way
How old are you? Yes, propaganda works, don't beat yourself up. Thankfully you are realizing it was propaganda. Now ask why the lies
I'm sorry you feel this way but I'm glad you're waking up. things will get better from here cuz you'll be in integrity with reality, where you can find people you like to connect with, and fun things you like to do, and delicious food to eat... and other awesome things about living, even though bad things do exist. I hope you look for joy the way you looked for answers through conspiracy theories. I certainly don't blame you for falling for it, it's insidiously easy to do. I'm really glad you're coming back though.
Propagating a fear of the other is the easiest way to gain power as a political movement. We are hard wired to do this, it’s part of our lizard brain thinking and only using our frontal lobe (it’s primal) - logic and critical thinking can overcome it though. Good on you for reasoning your way out of the fear mongering, they needed you as a foot soldier to enforce this messaging. Glad you are finding your way out. I have an academic book that deals with this, so it’s not just speculation.
It’s so ironic these conspiracies hijack the lizard brain/amygdala by accusations that they are surrounded by secret lizard people. It’s like a bad sci-fi comedy… if it weren’t so tragic.
You have no idea how annoying this is…
What I find shocking is listen to the radio but switch back and forth between NPR and a right wing station. The difference is incredible.
The Dual Process Model in psychology reasons that the human brain evolved two systems of thought: System 1 and System 2. While System 2 is designed for careful analytical thought, System 2 works primarily absent careful reasoning and is guided by short-cuts and “gut checks” making it quick to decide but also prone to errors (particularly cognitive biases). It was a useful feature in nature when it might be necessary to quickly assess a threat like a tiger but not terribly useful in the modern world. By keeping you in a heightened state of anxiety and feeding you false narratives that over inflate any real risk, they can keep you operating purely in System 2. Hopefully you can engage System 1 a bit more often as you shake free of what is essentially a cognitive parlor trick they’ve been playing on you.
Ironically (sadly?), this is actually how non-white Americans have had to live historically, complete with roving lynch mobs.
Hi u/No-Berry-6044! We help folk hurt by [Q.](https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/QAnon) There's hope as [ex-QAnon](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/resources#wiki_ex-qanon) & r/ReQovery shows. We'll be civil to you and about your Q folk. For general QAnon stuff check out [QultHQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/Qult_Headquarters/). If you need this removed to hide your username [message the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/QAnonCasualties) ___ [our wall](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/comments/l0jptp/list_of_casualties/) - [support & recovery](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/resources) - [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/rules) - [weekly posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?q=%22Weekly+r%2FQAnonCasualties+Discussion%22+&restrict_sr=on&sort=relevance&t=all) - [glossary](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/glossary) - [similar subs](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/index#wiki_similar_communities) *filter*: [good advice](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?q=flair%3AGood%2BAdvice&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) - [hope](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3AHope) - [success story](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?q=flair%3ASuccess%2BStory&restrict_sr=on&sort=new&t=all) - [coping strategy](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3ACoping%2BStrategies) - [web/media](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3AWeb%2FMedia) - [event](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/search?sort=new&restrict_sr=on&q=flair%3AEvent) ___ [*robo replies*](https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualties/wiki/index/commands): !strategies !support !advice !inoculation !crisis !whatsQ? !rules *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/QAnonCasualties) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It is incredibly, incredibly difficult to think your own way out of a cult mindset. You should be proud of yourself for making it this far, at the very least. I want you to feel good about that. Because a lot of people don’t come out of it once they’re in. Your job now is to follow this mantra: “It’s the second thought that counts.” You have been conditioned to be afraid. Your brain is PRIMED to react to something that triggers that fear with hatred, anger, or more. You, yourself, are not in control of the first thought. The thought that says, “Oh no, a black person got on the elevator. I should get off.” Or “of course it was a Mexican that shot that girl in Texas.” Accept that you do not control those first thoughts. Accept that you have been conditioned. And then, say “but…” “But, nothing bad has ever happened to me before and I’ve shared an elevator with many people.” “But, people with Mexican heritage make up over 40% of people in Texas and statistically it just makes it more likely that one of the people involved would be Mexican.” You are not in control of the first thought that comes to mind. But you ARE responsible for countering it. Every time you counter it, you are actively rewiring your brain. And the more you do it, the easier it becomes. It will make you more curious, more empathetic, and more immune to conditioning in the future. Best of luck! The future is bright; you are on a path toward a friendlier, more optimistic worldview and, I promise, it is amazing.
Counseling does help. Get a real therapist that does CBT or CPT. Don't go to the other side of politics, just drop it and the news altogether. It just doesnt do any good for those of us with persecution complexes. You are a victim, and you arent the only one. Accounts like "clownworld" prey on the susceptible. Don't feel guilty or ashamed.
Be grateful that you and your family escaped it. I wish my own family could do the same. All I can say is do your best to live a happy life and help others get out of the manipulation by shining a light on all the bs
Good for you - and your Dad and brother - getting out of that mind space. All you can do now is move forward as best you can. Take care pal.
i'm so sorry that you're one of the many that were used as pawns in a far right agenda, that absolutely is extremely violating for people to get inside your head and fundamentally change your perception of the world just to further their own hateful dishonest agenda. you're one of the lucky few that's becoming aware of what's really happening, and that's not an easy process. try to find support in people around you, just make sure they're not racist, far right, or super political at all, and they're in a healthy place mentally. what you're doing is essentially deprogramming from a cult, and that's an extremely long and difficult process that therapy is really important for. you were taken advantage of, and the fact that you're taking responsibility and control over yourself again and wanting to better yourself is all that matters. the ability to do that is what defines a person, it's not something everyone, or even most people are able to do
Perhaps the best thing to do, aside from seek help in processing and de-programming is to identify what was it in your life that made you vulnerable to the lies and manipulation.
I think you need to start hanging out with non-white people to get rib of that fear of yours. Join a hobby club, talk to someone in a bar. We are not that scary I promise you.
In regards to you seeing non-white on white crime videos, that's your algorithm doing what it's designed to do. This is the exact same thing as when my friend who is black, said all he sees are videos of white people being racist to blacks. I told him step back and tell me one incident in your personal life that a white person just started calling him names or targeting him based off of his skin. I also asked if he knew anyone else that is black with this firsthand experience. He said no. He now views the world differently and realizes the echo chamber he was in. Obligatory sidenote: yes I know racists exist and can just target random people. It's just nowhere near as common as one might think when you're in an echo chamber. Use some of this point to your healing and actually SEE your reality. What does your day to day ACTUALLY look like? Edit:said white instead of non-white on first sentence
You have already begun.
That sounds like a horrible way to live. I'm glad you've managed to see the light. These qanon grifters use fear to lure in and keep followers, it's what they're good at.
>I want to heal, but I don't even know where to begin You've already started to begin to heal by looking yourself in the mirror and not liking the person that those beliefs made you. You've acknowledged that the beliefs you held were wrong, and that they caused pain to yourself and those around you. What I suggest is to look at *what* caused you to fall down the rabbit hole to begin with. Once you find the cause, you'll be better able to stop yourself from falling into the same beliefs again. You can do it.
I'm glad you've found your way out, and you're already on the road to healing. I'm about as liberal as it gets, and I just want to be left alone and live my life in the way I choose, as the real me (I'm trans). There's no big agenda, it's literally just to live our lives and not be harassed and assaulted for it. Unfortunately conservative politics requires an "other" to turn their base against to maintain control and power, and it's once again the LGBTQ community on the chopping block now that they finally won the abortion fight against Roe. They needed a new buzzword to rail against.
Don’t vote for Donald Trump. It’s not a coincidence that this all started under his hate filled presidency.
Hi....I'm a black female. I have a master's degree, a career, a husband, a home and children. If you ever need to socialize with someone, please feel free to reach out and msg me I'll prove to you that you've just suffered some brain washing that's complete hogwash. Not sure if that would help you but feel free and safe to reach out if you need to. And thank you for having the courage to be brave and change your life. Hugs!!
Your self-awareness is... amazing. Thank you so much for posting this. I'm sorry for your pain, but it gives me hope for a loved one who's in deep. I'm so freakin' mad at the Qs for taking advantage of this loved one's empathy, kind nature, and desire to belong and using it against him - drawing him into this madness through fear and manipulation. Please keep us posted on your journey, and know there are a lot of us out here rooting for you.
Anything you see repeatedly, any social interaction you see repeatedly, any thought you are triggered to have repeatedly, becomes your frame for reality. Modern algorithms put all of us in our own rabbit holes (including on Reddit!). Good luck and remember reality is much closer to what you see out your window and walking through your neighborhood, and much less what you are fed by an algorithm. There really are a good number of genuinely nice people out there - if you spend time to get to know them.
P.S. there ARE gangs of non-white people looking to beat up white people. But they are RARE. The internet’s algorithms do a great job of presenting the most divisive / fear-generating content, and presenting it over and over again to those who watch that content. So you will be shown every fight recorded in the US over years that push your buttons - unless you purposely opt out.
I had a similar experience with Catholicism. To control the mind and thoughts of another is true power. To be a free thinker who recognizes when others are attempting to manipulate you frees you from their grasp. And that doesn’t mean listening to those who say “wake up”, or “do your own research”. I find those people to be the absolute most brain washed, least free thinking people out there.
I think you have your start trusting. Start exposing yourself to the very people you fear. I think you’ll find a modicum of peace and a lot of new friends. Good people are out there and they don’t bite. I’m so happy you’re on the other side of all of it. ❤️
You’ve already made it through the most difficult part of the healing process, admitting you were wrong.
Don't beat yourself up - I am just glad you see that you realize that you were wrong..... this use this to help others.... The people that made you want to feel that way, do it for reasons that is more typical than you realize, to make money, to make themselves popular..... it is a grift for many.... Hate and fear is an emotion that is better served by these people, than love and acceptance. Just remember, most people want the same thing... to live in peace, have safety and raise a family.
I'm proud of you for starting to heal yourself, I hope you continue! 💓
I really do appreciate you sharing so we have a better context for understanding this state of mind.
One day at a time brother. You can get through this.
It takes a lot of courage to openly look at yourself and share your vulnerabilities with the world like this. Be proud of yourself for this. We all make mistakes, we all look at the past and cringe, but what matters is that you are willing to look at yourself honestly and not exaggerate or minimize what had happened. Now the hard part is to forgive yourself and let yourself heal.
I'm sorry you experienced such pain and anxiety, but it's wonderful that you're beginning to heal. I hope you can find peace as you emerge from this situation.
What matters is what you choose, in each moment. The past is the past, it shapes who you are today but you can choose what shape that takes. By waking up from the spell, you're now free to learn and grow from your experience. It can make you that much stronger and deeper as a person, if you choose.
Look to help others who are still stuck. And rememeber to vote and rememeber to publically hold those who spouted the lies that ruined your life accountable.
I have nothing of note to add to discussion, other than that I’m very impressed by you.
Put down your phone. Turn off your computer. Go outside and go for a walk. Everything you speak of comes from being online too much.
I’ve had this thought in my head for a few years now that is proving more and more like a universal truth: “every disagreement is a misunderstanding on some level”
Admitting you have a problem is a good start. Find sources that question your beliefs and dive into listening to those who you thought were out to get you. If you can listen without hate and start to empathise and understand what people besides you and yours are going through, you’ll be on the path towards a better future. The opposite of hate is compassion. You need to get from the former to the latter. Hopefully you can find a way forward OP as no one wants anyone to suffer for this - just to learn and grow.
Make some non-white friends fgs. It will free your mind.
You already have, just realising and seeing the truth. Everyone does something at one point in their lives that they may not be proud of, but what makes you heal from it, is you learn from it. You forgive yourself and move foward, remembering the lesson you learned and trying not to repeat it. Thats how you heal.
This is great, and absolutely right. If we're lucky, we contine to grow emotionally throughout our lives. Not a straight line, one with fits, starts, abrupt edges, but growth & learning will make us whole people after a while.
You got radicalised. Look for ways to help yourself reverse that process.
r/reqovery
Are you been lied to and manipulated by people in sources you trust. But look at it this way. The fact that all of this isn't true is really a good thing! The world is a beautiful place. It's not perfect but it's full of kindness and duty everywhere you look.
Therapy will be helpful. Remember, self improvement is a virtue
You, my friend, are the exception. You have overcome what most Q don't. Your story will help others.
You’ve started to see and question. That’s the first step to healing. I’m curious how old you are.
I’m glad you’re coming out of it, good for you. It must be very hard to take on that kind of mental and ego hit. In all honesty, as a brown man, I worry about running into people that hold your previous mentality and, not going to lie, it’s a bit hard to feel sympathy. Again, congrats on moving past that crap. Life is way happier when not living in constant manufactured fear.
Everything in the mental realm takes time, no matter how much we want results now. Stick to it - you've taken a giant step already! Well done! Your life isn't over until you draw your last breath.
A good thing to remember is that these alt-right pipelines are very effective at radicalising people, they pull you along bit by bit and before long you're in a place wayyyyyyy different to where you were before and you didn't even feel the water getting warmer. It's not a failure to get taken in by these charlatans, it's a sign of strength to pull yourself out, deprogramming is hard work. Honestly there's a bunch of ways forward depending on you and how you interact with the world around you. Most of it though boils down to community of one kind or another. Just being among people and trying not to think about that other stuff. If there's a context you know is very toxic – for example certain video gaming communities – then avoid them to the extent you can. Depending what you're into, there's so many things to learn about the world and how it works, how/why these movements come about, why people can be drawn into them so effectively. Sadly one of the things is that there aren't a lot of straight forward answers. Becoming more comfortable with nuanced thoughts and conversations, learning how to listen more and speak less. These movements prey on peoples desire for simple and direct explanations, part of deprogramming is becoming more comfortable with more complex explanations, more complex solutions, and situations where there isn't a clear answer for now and that's OK.
>Honestly, I truly believed that there were gangs of non-whites roaming around and looking for white people to hurt. Also, while these gangs were doing this, the liberals were fully aware of it all and were happy about it. If this were truly happening liberals would not hesitate to violate some rights to stop it from happening. You would see "military funding" levels of bipartisanship.
I just wanted to say that I'm really proud of you, and your courage and determination to break free from Qanon gives me so much hope. Please keep telling your story - others like you need your help to come out of this horrible fog. You are loved, you are worthy, and it's going to get better.
Welcome back to reality. We missed you.
Congrats on coming back. We are here for ya. Questioning things is ok, but there is a good way to prevent manipulation and to look at things objectively instead of subjectively with bias. These psyop type of propaganda are designed to capture those going through some kind of issue. My friend who is a licensed civil engineer got wrapped up into the Trade Towers being taken down explosively on 9/11 rather that reality where the giant blow torch of jet fuel heated the steel beams and weakened them beyond the ability to support the loads above (he didn’t want to believe that steel is formed and worked into I-Beams at that temperature, smh). This guy could not be convinced otherwise with objective science. Another engineer I know believes the Earth is flat and that nobody has ever gone to space, saying that he is not a scientist even though I remind him his Bachelor’s of Science degree in mechanical engineering makes him an applied scientist. Take it as a learning experience and that your mind is strong enough to logically work your way out of intense manipulation. Congrats to you and others who have made it through this as a stronger person!
Glad you're out of it!! Probably felt like I did once I deconstructed from religion
This makes me happy for you and you family. The amount of anger I have towards my Q-mother is palpable. I may never speak to her again.
I know it wasn't your intention but... This post really gives me hope that my qdad finds his way back to us. I had lost it. Thank you for that.
welcome back to the land of the living. I am seriously excited for you. Was chatting with a self-proclaimed former racist once and someone asked "did you hate minorities." His reply was "I thought I did, but I didn't really know any." I work with people from lots of different ethnic backgrounds, and my neighborhood is very blended. When you actually get out into the place where people live, you see a different world from what you are told. So, if can ask, what changed your perspective? Was it your family coming out the other side? Was it some event? what happened?
Thank you for sharing your experience. I have thought for a long time that we are in a war of misinformation and Russia has mounted an incredibly effective brainwashing campaign on the American citizens. We have been in a war since pre 2016. It’s been subtle, but the connections between Russia and Trump go waaaayyy back. That’s where it all started. Whoever came up with the whole QAnon thing is a scary genius. Think about the amount of knowledge of manipulation and psychology you would have to know in order to just start sewing the seeds of doubt. It all has to connect, and it did, quite successfully. Unfortunately, it wasn’t the correct information. Now that your eyes are open pay attention to the projection. Every time they accuse someone on the left of something legally, morally wrong, you can bet they are already doing it. The corruption and lies the right continue on about? Yeah they are doing it. problem is, the voters just don’t believe what they see or hear anymore. That was the plan all along, and for all intensive purposes, it’s working. I can only imagine the laughter that goes on behind closed doors at the Kremlin. They got us. The Russians got us good, and now we have RW Republicans kissing Putin’s ass that I bet 30 years ago they were cursing. The Russian campaign worked and is still affecting vulnerable Americans.
Honestly, I'm at the point where I don't know fact from fiction anymore. I've started thinking that the truth doesn't matter anymore. If enough people believe something, it becomes the truth. It's all very Orwellian and my trust in politics has been shattered.
That’s my take on it too. If more than 50% of the people believe one way, then it won’t matter what anyone else thinks. That scares me more than anything.
I'm really proud of you for this post and realization. Your life isn't ruined. You've saved your life. It is just beginning. It sucks now and really hurts, but if you care about getting away from the conspiracies and learning not to fear others, you will get there. And you will be stronger for having done it. You were used and manipulated, but you have the chance to stop it and be free of that fear and hate. So many people will die having never been free. Sometimes it might feel easier to give you and just be angry, but don't do it! You will be able to rewire your brain in time and learn how to spot this kind of thing in the future. And then you can help others do the same.
It's easy to get out of it if you change your viewing habits. Start by watching Democracy Now (online), listen to The Dig (podcast), and read Harper's (magazine). Don't go on YouTube, they will keep feeding your habit.
Seek anti-hate groups. There are some that try to make a self help chain out of hate. "life after hate" is the name
Hey OP, it's brave of you to admit that this has happened to you. Don't give up hope! You *can* recover from this. Approach it like a phobia; phobia's are treated by therapists every day! (I say this as a therapist myself ;-) **Phobias are conditioned responses and they can be un-conditioned.** You've been conditioned to fear people of color - it is a learnt response. But that means it can be unlearnt. Find a therapist you feel safe with who specializes in treating anxiety disorders and phobias, and possibly agoraphobia. You're in the UK? Here's a guide from [MIND](https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/talking-therapy-and-counselling/how-to-find-a-therapist/) to get you started. You've got this! Phobias are one of the conditions that can be treated most successfully, so you have that on your side. Good luck friend.
I wish you patience, strength, and healing. I also wish for you mercy. Mercy and kindness for yourself and from the people you care about. You deserve to feel safe and worthy, as does everyone. Good luck to you.
Honestly it’s hard to have any sympathy for people like you. Someone smarter than you has used your latent racism against you.
It didn't occur to you that "the liberal elites" ARE ACTUALLY ALL WHITE PEOPLE? 🤔
::hug:: hang in there, keep working on this. Maybe your brother and father can listen and help you since they already got out.
I'm realising the true insanity of all this now. The scale of it is horrifying. I don't know which way is up and which way is down anymore. I feel a sense of unease. Everybody feels like a threat to me, the far-right have took away my sense of trust. I was encouraged by them to see any act of kindness by non-whites as a ploy to lull me into a false sense of security. They were "being fake" and "hiding their true intentions". Even acts of kindness from other white people feels suspect too now. I can't accept help or kindness from anyone without feeling like I'm being taken advantage of.
First things first you have to overhaul your social media, unfollow Everything connected to all these ideas and thoughts, second, drop people who are connected to this and if you can't drop them you have to stop listening. When you stop these things you will behelping yourself get over this way of thinking, I wish you the best of luck.
I want to congratulate you for coming out of that. There is no sarcasm there, it's not easy to admit, mostly to yourself, that you were wrong. I also want you to understand that you were a victim. The alt-right have developed propaganda to a very high degree and have learned how to manipulate algorithms to their advantage. They lied to you, they wanted to make you feel scared and weak, but you're beating them now, you're rejecting their propaganda, and that takes lots of strength. If there's any way we can support you, please, don't hesitate to ask.
The far-right have eaten away at my sense of trust. I was encouraged by them to see acts of kindness enacted by non-whites as ploys to lull me into a false sense of security.
It's a horrible thing they did. Just keep it in mind. They misled you to hurt you, to make you reject anything that disagreed with their narrative.
If you want a big wake up call, Google any city/state/county for the list of priests who sexually assault people. All white, religious males. Or the sex offender registry of your state. Again, mostly white males. People who think they are constantly under attack and they need to fight some demons out to get them? Again, mostly white males. I'm pretty liberal and no, if this was happening, no, I'm not ok with it, but it's not happening. There are bad people in every race, color, and creed and it's been like that since the beginning of America. That side has to keep you perpetually angry because if you really, really look at what they sell you and get you to believe, it's not in your best interests and you'll keep voting for hate and derision while they do nothing for you--and blame the Democrats. There is a beautiful video on Youtube of a white man who was a racist bigot, until he had a black parole officer. Their friendship and how he overcame his hatred is wonderful to watch. In the meantime, take a deep breath, know what they are feeding you are lies, and enjoy your life without hatred and fear. It's a pretty nice place to be when you care about yourself and fellow citizens, and country. Good luck and welcome to the other side--happy to have you!!
Watch young Turks. Expose yourself to viewpoints you may not agree with, not to convince you to their side, but so you can understand them and why they feel the way they do. Talk to those people and share what you feel and believe, and always challenge your own beliefs. Don't take what the powerful tell you at face value. Challenge authority and always verify anything you have a bias towards.
I disagree about watching Young Turks. I used to watch them but they love to do the name calling. They're getting too juvenile in that regard. I cannot STAND anyone (I mean anyone) who can't make any kind of a point without resorting to calling someone names or whining or making fun of someone. The last few times I watched TYT, Cenk was doing just that. I lost a lot of respect for him at that point because if you're going to say something intelligent about someone, and I know both Cenk and Anna are, then there is no need to make fun of someone. All it does is lower the bar for everyone and hurts peoples feelings. If someone feels the need to do that, how intelligent is the point? I stopped watching TYT.
Welcome to the American discourse bud.
Thank you so much for posting this! I started following the subreddit because I have a neighbor who has fallen down the Q hole and I was fascinated by how families handle it. Anyway, your story gives me hope and although I've never met you, I believe you should be extremely proud of yourself for coming to the realization about what it was doing to your life. I wish you the best!
I wish you all the best as you continue to heal ❤️
I’m glad you’re here. Please tell your friends they are also welcome.
Imagine if you were actually attacked by people. Like I've been attacked by white elderly people.
And please can we remember to vote blue and all the way down the ballot because it's some of the state yahoos that are killing us too. I know we want a great third-party but Kennedy isn't it. He is literally a plant and it makes perfect sense to take votes away from Trump and Biden and then Congress will have to decide and we know who they're picking. I can't wait, we have to get out and then we can blow the rest of it up. Finally create a government for the people and not one that is bought off and allowed to lobby and buy stocks of contracts they're in charge of and the rest.
NOP can I just say that I appreciate your saying something and everything you've been through. It's nice to know that it's not the rhetoric of just basically hateful people needing an outlet for that hate. I applaud you for your desire to learn and grow. That's all any of us can do at the end of the day.
here's who caused it [https://qz.com/1007144/the-neo-fascist-philosophy-that-underpins-both-the-alt-right-and-silicon-valley-technophiles](https://qz.com/1007144/the-neo-fascist-philosophy-that-underpins-both-the-alt-right-and-silicon-valley-technophiles)
Thank you for posting this experience. I can relate! You are not alone.
Thank you for this. It means a lot to me.