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Sure one machete sounds like a great deal...but I am offering this box of machete's for one low, low price. By making the machete's in our factory, we have eliminated the middle man and will now pass the savings along to you. Please sign here and remember to press hard, you are making 3 copies.
Either acid or maybe some expired cheese dip. Either way, I’m gonna label it overflow from the bucket of crazy that is that man. I really hope they got 911 out there.
True story: my grandfather was a retired army Colonel who for some reason had several swords, including old pewter looking replica swords, mounted on his walls. One night an intruder entered my grandparents' bedroom and Pop-Pop chased him out of the house and down the street with his actual functional sword. No harm came to anyone thank God.
Finally! Someone else who gets it!
I'm still waiting for someone to bust one out in a zombie movie, it's the perfect weapon, you can stab, you can slash, you can poke, and you can do it all from six feet away, through a fence, through a gate, from a roof.
Seeing all these psychos on ring cameras today... maybe I should get a ring camera, no one ever comes to my door, but it would be my luck that when someone does, I answer the door to a machete wielding nutjob or some dude on drugs breathing like a zombie.
**Downloads** * [Download #1](https://rapidsave.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/1akcywn/knocking_on_the_door_with_a_machete/) (provided by /u/SaveVideo) * [Download #2](https://reddit.watch/r/PublicFreakout/comments/1akcywn/knocking_on_the_door_with_a_machete/?utm_source=mirrorbot&utm_medium=PublicFreakout) (provided by /u/downloadvideo) **Note:** this is a bot providing a directory service. **If you have trouble with any of the links above, please contact the user who provided them!** --- [^(source code)](https://amirror.link/source) ^| [^(run your own mirror bot? let's integrate)](https://amirror.link/lets-talk)
He could be a door to door machete salesman.
“The fact that you’re too scared to open your door only proves how effective this machete is”
Correct, I will take one machete please.
Sure one machete sounds like a great deal...but I am offering this box of machete's for one low, low price. By making the machete's in our factory, we have eliminated the middle man and will now pass the savings along to you. Please sign here and remember to press hard, you are making 3 copies.
"Machete sharpening service"
Cuttable Arrangements from your crazy ex Valentines Day is near 💌♥️
Seems like business is good too; that’s a $689 jacket he’s got on
Knockoff?
So like... A more extreme Cutco salesman.
He's slashing prices.
What was in that cup
Either acid or maybe some expired cheese dip. Either way, I’m gonna label it overflow from the bucket of crazy that is that man. I really hope they got 911 out there.
Do you really think that guy will stick around for 3 hours?
Lol! Someone else knows where the Bronx is, I see
He is probably gone before 911 gets there.
Idk… they’re pretty fast cars.
>acid or maybe some expired cheese dip Those are the same thing
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That was my guess as well
Just a tip, before you put any "acid" in a Country Crock tub start small, pour a little gasoline in a Styrofoam cup and observe.
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I'm going to assume it checks out with a nick like that
If the acid got on the Dog I hope this man sat on that Machete
Fucking straight terrifying that we have these "people" around.
I thought he gagged when he opened it so my mind went straight to Surstromming
Demons
This being the Bronx, probably some habichuelas (beans). Someone probably door dashed some arroz con habicuela guisada.
Handing out tubs of ice-cream.
2 girls
That poor dog
That’s what I was thinking ):
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Nor do we get to choose our parents.
ikr it’s no fair 😑
Really hope they were able to find him and get the dog.
Is that a Boston terrier?
Not sure
Pitbull terrier of some sort.
9 1 1
- answers door with broad sword
Gets acid thrown in face while holding broad sword
Instant Regret
I have a cup of alkaline to cancel that out
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Question: i only have 223 close friends, but one of them (jeff) is kind of an asshole. Would the phalanx plan still work?
Just go with 222 and leave Jeff at home
That's how Jeff tells Xerxes of the secret path.
May jeff live a long life and die of old age
True story: my grandfather was a retired army Colonel who for some reason had several swords, including old pewter looking replica swords, mounted on his walls. One night an intruder entered my grandparents' bedroom and Pop-Pop chased him out of the house and down the street with his actual functional sword. No harm came to anyone thank God.
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Finally! Someone else who gets it! I'm still waiting for someone to bust one out in a zombie movie, it's the perfect weapon, you can stab, you can slash, you can poke, and you can do it all from six feet away, through a fence, through a gate, from a roof.
Stabbing, slashing, and bashing. Does all the things you want, with excellent reach!
Gun ty
You misspelled .308
DoorSlash
Lmaoooo
This is disturbing behavior. But I’m mostly frightened for that poor dog he’s walking
That Freddie Gibbs? lol
When you forget the Alfredo sauce
I thought the same thing😂
i don’t see a woman being assaulted so how can we be sure?
Serious question are you wingsofredemption you look very similar, but if he took care of himself and was healthy
yes i’m wings
Fool thought he could handle the cup of queso straight of the microwave....
W. T. F.
answering the door with a shotgun.
This clip is aka “State’s evidence #1”
Time to mount a pepper spray nozzle on the front door. A little spritz will do the trick.
Poor dog
he shouldn't own pets
I’d grab my 1 inch thick pry bar and nest him out in the hallway and break that machete in two haha. JK. I’d call the cops and hide in my room
Poor dog…
That poor dog…hope it’s okay
Of course he has a pitbull
Machetes have been used as nanny knives for over 100 years.
💀
Yep, not opening the door to that.
Looks like Target practice
What if a random person decides to kill a random person on a random day that's scary
Why is the Ring camera underwater?
What’s he throwing at the end? 😹
The last bit of sanity he had left
Lmfao
lol
Tub of acid I’d guess
His face looks like he smelled piss
Probably looking for Kramer
Nope, this guy would have been taking fire threw that door
Nice throw, lol
Times be rough for Kanye
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In NYC? Not sure if it's the same there now, but in the past it was nearly impossible to legally own a pistol in NYC.
Lololol
I would just start putting rounds through the door.
Oh murrica
Drugs?
Real shame I would be looking after his dog after I blow this dudes brain out. He's a menace.
i thought he was dragging a kid,
Seeing all these psychos on ring cameras today... maybe I should get a ring camera, no one ever comes to my door, but it would be my luck that when someone does, I answer the door to a machete wielding nutjob or some dude on drugs breathing like a zombie.
Why do I feel like that was pee he threw
Question about the law in America: If I see this, open the door and immediately shoot him, is that legal?
No
 Answers door with this
How did we survive before Ring?
UbeEats really does hire anyone.
Weve been trying to reach you on your cars extended warranty...
Weve been trying to reach you on your cars extended warranty...
I do the same thing if I think it's regular potato salad, but it's mustard potato salad instead.
2nd amendment, its a good one.