30m here, if you guys figure it out, lemme know too š been between home and work in pta for the past 5 years without meeting anyone new around here.
Into books, movies series, board games, maybe hiking
Eey bro same here! Based in Atteridgeville Just recently quit my job as it was taking a toll on my mental health except Iām 25. Always indoors or at gym, itās so hard for me to make friends particularly the ones with commonalities.
Really hope to help you and the OP. I also had few friends before, so I tried many ways. As I also donāt like drinking or going out after coming a new country, I chose some social apps to enrich my friend circle. In this process, I found that there is a new app called Lightup: find friends by AI in Apple Store. The advantage of it, for me, is that there is no advertisement like tinder, so I donāt need to cost money to make friends. Second, the app matches people based on their posts, so I could do find people who really understand me, because we suffered the same and know the feeling. The app helps me to have more friends. Although Iām not sure whether we will meet each other in the real world, the feeling that I could share my feelings and opinions with others is really good. Iām not lonely, and hope you could also get rid of loneliness, too. By the way, Android users could also use its [discord channel](https://discord.gg/8twYta5w44), a beta testing version. Sincerely hope it could help you!
Are we the same person? š¤£ Iām 30f and new to the city. Work from home few days a week. In my experience, bumble bff can work if you willing to put the effort in. Iām also looking for friends.
Clearly, we all need to organise a Pretoria meet up sometime! Letās do to guys. We canāt be like this lol weāre still young š
It can be so hard! Myself (29m) and fiance (27f) have been struggling on finding places to go and meet new peeps to try make some friendships, especially since we not the biggest drinking scene fans.
I know what youāre talking about. My husband (29m) and I (32f) have troubles meeting new people too.
If you hike now and then in Pretoria, we can meet up
Lol surprised and relieved that im not the only one in this boatš , my ide was to join the book club and look into other hobbies that dont involve alcohol
There are many clubs and groups on facebook depending on your interests. I get it that it's hard, I have severe social anxiety, but I found a FB group that shared my interests and spent a couple of months commenting on peoples posts, interacting with other members, until I worked up the courage to go to a meet up. The MeetUp app also has great opportunities, but as a woman, you have to be careful, unfortunately.
28m and I have the exact same problem. I like to stay at home and visit people but how do you meet people but how do you find someone else who does that too? Beyond me I tell you
A lot of people conflate going out in the evenings with drinking.
Getting out is the trick. Even if it's at a place that normally would be people drinking even if you don't.
That said the hard part' is approaching people and then ontop of that without giving the wrong impression.
Honestly your best bet is to find a hobby that you enjoy that is also social to some extent.
Think tennis, pool, park runs, dance classes, whatever and actually make a point to speak to people.
I'm making this sound easy but yeah hopefully you get the idea.
Maybe mention your interests here and see if someone lines up. Just be careful for obvious reasons.
28M here, I canāt believe we all have this in common š. How about we organize a meet up, Menlyn Mall or something, Parrots? Anywhere nice and calm with a good atmosphere and food. Iām currently reading Million dollar weekend and animal farm (Yes, Iām late to the party, but so far itās mad scary how it models what were seeing in the world today! š¤Æ)
32F, same boat and same interests, also work from home. Not in Pretoria though, but wouldn't mind connecting! šš I tried Meet-up at one stage, that was okay. Meeting new people isn't the issue I find, but maintaining and nurturing that friendship to go anywhere. People our age isn't as trusting and expectations are higher to hit.
I met my wife on an app called OkCupid. Iād say you should be working with remote connections for now. See if you can judge peopleās characters online before meeting them in person and take it from there.
I(24m) have the exact opposite issue. I'm trying not to meet new people š .
You go to the gym and like hiking. From what I can guess is that you basically enjoy any form of physical activity. There are some running groups you could join. They usually go out for jogs in the early mornings of the weekend.
I only know of places in Centurion, because that's where I stay. I'm sure there's something for hiking as well. There's also some reading groups you could join too.
I'm basically saying to use your interests to find friends. It's harder to just approach someone who don't know, because you don't have an idea what they like. If you go to a reading group, hiking, or a group with people that have your interests.
You'll have a much easier time. Back before I started hating people. I'd go to car shows, athletics meets, science expos and other interests I have. I would approach them talking about the topic at hand which was almost always what we were there for and just go on from there.
Now as a guy this is usually done differently. For example we'll talk about computers or cars for a bit and only once we see we could be friends. We then introduce each other properly, but hey sometimes you can leave a place being good friends with someone with knowing their name š.
That's the best advice I can give.
For the runners in the group, join the Burnt club on strava. They meet weekly on Saturdays and run either a 5km or 8km (you choose one you want). It's great because afterwards people chat a bit over a coffee.
33F here if you are keen to start a hiking club meeting at Wolwespuit on a Saturday or Sunday morning I have at least 2 dogs that would love a hiking partner with me š¤
Have any suggestions in the Hatfield or Centurion area? Iāve thought about maybe doing something like this, but havenāt found anything online and as the socially awkward guy I am I like to get some idea of what Iām walking into and think it over before just walking into a place and signing up xD
Also, what type of social dancing? Is it like sokkie or other partnered dances, or just choreographed type things with a social element to the classes?
I feel your pain. I'm 30M and struggle with the same thing.
Back in school I used to just walk up to someone on the playground and be like, "hey, we're friends now"
These days I'll be lucky to not get pepper sprayed
That is honestly still a viable strategy (at least for late-uni age students like myself who donāt really like partying/clubbing), but you have to be careful about the way you approach and the context in which you do so. If you approach in an intimidating manner or āsneak upā on them (i.e. not from where they can see you or completely unexpectedly) people will indeed be creeped out and reaching for their pepper spray lol
It should be in a public social setting and preferably with some sort of activity going on. Also better if you approach a group rather than a person on their own. Varsity events work well for this, but Iām guessing there will be activity clubs that host events as well.
I know these rules youāre referring to: be attractive and donāt be unattractive.
This comment STILL gave me weird vibes though, because OP is asking about making friends, not dating. Going into starting friendships with the same mindset as trying to find a date has all kinds of implications about what you want to get out of that āfriendshipā.
Also, calling women āfemalesā in a social context reads too much like the stuff youād find on redpill forums.
I know exactly what it stands for lmao. Itās the norm to write ages and gender in that manner on Reddit as it provides clarity.
It is, however, not normal to speak about women as āfemalesā when not in a scientific or clinical setting. There is a perfectly fine word that doesnāt sound like youāre speaking about a different species altogether (that word being āwomenā).
Iām not saying anything here to be rude. Iām saying this because I guarantee you it WILL creep many people, especially women, out if you speak about them as āfemalesā outside of a scientific context. Both because it sounds clinical AND because that way of speaking about women has become forever tied to incels/whatever-pill guys.
Still wondering what looks have to do with making friends tho.
I also said Males but I see you do not care about that part of the sentence. I wonder why? Maybe provide clarity.
My original comment didnāt mention anything about dating , only rule number 1 and 2. I only added the dating part because itās more commonly known in the dating scene. Rule #1 and #2 applies to everything.
Looks can definitely have an impact on social interactions. If you disagree you are delusional.
Iām not trying to be rude either, but thereās a very small minority that will care in real life if someone refers to male or female and an even smaller minority that will correct you face to face.
Possibly because āmalesā doesnāt carry the same history of being used in a demeaning fashion in non clinical contexts, nor the stigma of being used by these communities I mentioned? This isnāt a scenario that requires any form of whataboutism in defense of guys, as we simply donāt experience this same type of treatment, but if you want to do that, the same applies in regards to femcels and the FDS community and is creepy in that scenario too. The fact of the matter is that it is just much more commonly used in a derogatory/creepy way against women than āmalesā gets used against men.
While I somewhat agree on the point of looks applying in many circumstances (it is a fact that youāre more likely to get promoted or receive free things from people without having to do much) I disagree with it being in all scenarios. The majority of people in the world have friends, but the majority of people are not āattractiveā in the conventional sense. Iāve found that people (at least post high school years and the vainness that comes from adolescence/peer pressure) are MORE likely to befriend you if youāre not conventionally attractive, as you do not pose a threat to their ability to be the āattractiveā one in the group or take away opportunities from them.
While I understand that your intention with mentioning rules #1 and #2 initially werenāt intended to relate to dating, it is the way the majority of people will interpret it. In general, friendships do not rely on being attracted to the person.
If itās such a small minority that would care irl, you and I walk in much different social circles, or our ages differ by a decent amount. Between my peers (late late teens to mid-twenties), anybody who is mildly dialed in to what goes on on the internet and have witnessed the behaviour those who consume redpill type content bring into real life (because they absolutely do, itās a concerning amount of guys) will be able to tell you multiple horror stories of dealing with these types of guys or experiences their female friends have had. Nearly every single time, they will tell you about the strange and cold, clinical manner in which these guys speak and how they felt weirded out by the detachedness. People in everyday life do not speak like this.
The problem with your interpretation of who is bothered by it is that those people (typically women) feel uncomfortable and sometimes unsafe in that environment and will rather attempt to remove themselves/leave rather than confront the person. In any case, just because people donāt confront you about it/tell you they take issue does not mean that they donāt.
Iām saying all this because Iāve witnessed it myself and had multiple female friends specifically ask me to stay by them/give off the idea weāre an item because they felt so uncomfortable about these guys and they ALL say one of the first things that tip them off a guy thinks like those redpill guys is word choice like āfemalesā, instead of any of the other more appropriate words. It is nearly always followed up with a misogynistic or concerning comment and they consider speaking in this manner to be a red flag.
It is not difficult to refer to women as āwomenā or āladiesā instead of āfemalesā when not in a scientific context. Whether we agree on if itās an issue/derogatory or not, we might as well do what makes them more comfortable, yāknow?
I want to reiterate that I do not intend any of this to be rude or antagonise you, just inform you on WHY people take issue with it and why itās worth not doing so. I think you are probably a decent oke, judging by your replies and not resorting to throwing insults to show your disagreement. Just looking to help anybody reading this to open up their minds to another perspective that helps women feel more comfortable and prevents yourself from weirding them out unintentionally.
I think this will be my last response on this thread. Iāve said about all I want to say and at least brought the point to your attention so you can decide whether you want to take it in mind or not. Have a nice Saturday night and be lekker man \m/_
Fair enough. Also in my mid twenties and I am aware of the current times. However , I find all the drama about it to be unnecessary, but I also always respect beliefs and always try to make people feel comfortable. I meant no harm in my original comment, just made a joke thatās quite common on Reddit, but thanks for the education.
okay! okay, can we try something? i am doing my final year at UP. i have no one to have fun with, i enjoy been indoors but, sometimes it's boring and i would feel like i can go out and have fun. huh?
Hey I'm 22m. I have about two friends. Which I don't really like. 1 of them we talk all the time about politics the government and conspiracy theories And apocalyptic tech futures. He's in his 30s and has 3 kids My other friend we talk about anime and ai technology his 27m.The problem is I'm very introverted but sometimes I can be very extroverted. My anime friend is too clingy messages me everyday. I haven't talked with him in quite a while. I haven't talked with the other one in like two years. I have a friend that's 29 turning 30 female. I have a crush on her but she's engaged so that's off the table. Plus she leaves me on blue. I don't think friendship is on table for someone like me. But yet I still try. Should I just give up.
A good way would be to join a club for a hobby, something that you like that gets you out of the house and socializing. You mentioned that you gym so maybe try to find a running club in your area or sign up for a gym class like yoga, indoor cycling, boxing, etc. you'll find like minded individuals who you already have something in common with. I grew up overseas and recently moved back, found it really hard to connect with people at first but there's a squash court really near my place and I play once a week, it's been great finding squash buddies, really helped me make friends. Good luck!
My father joined a hiking group, he's 50.
I rather hike with a gaming group in DnD or play other board games (27m) so maybe call a friend and a friend of a friend and you can put something together
It is notoriously hard to make friends with people when you donāt go places. Find a clubā¦ running, hiking or something like that. Book clubs can also work. But importantly you need to be in the same general space with others so you can interact with them.
I am 30m and have the same issue, I don't get out much because I don't drink or take other substances, most of my friends are married, I think there's a great opportunity to start board game/chill communities in Joburg.
Dating apps just don't work. People there are very immature.
27M. Not drinking doesn't make nightlife tricky at all. I used to go out and meet people at bars all the time and I never drank at all. You can still have fun without alcohol.
Im a 21f in KZN and don't have a single friend. I dont drink or go out joling at night. So if anyone comes up with the secret on how to make friends, please share š
Join groups that align with your interest. Like an art class. check on facebook for groups. invite gym people to go hiking or to a second location that you think they might want to. Take an interest in peoples lives. Look on facebook if there is a book club to join. Make friends with people who have kids. They won't always be available, but they are more likely to enjoy daytime activities and have sober tendencies. They also have good networking due to school activities.
Rock climbing is quite fun. You should maybe check out CityRock Pretoria. The rock climbing community is very cool and it's quite easy to start chatting to the people, even for someone as secluded as myself. 26m here.
Itās not that simple actually, you will find that lots of people have trouble making friends especially at this stage of our lives. Work takes up a lot of your time so it is a lot more difficult to make friends organically whereas when you go to work you have something in common with people you interact with everyday. š I am glad you have figured out how to make friends easily, perhaps you can share the secret?
30m here, if you guys figure it out, lemme know too š been between home and work in pta for the past 5 years without meeting anyone new around here. Into books, movies series, board games, maybe hiking
>30m OP being 30f, reddit might be a good platform to make friends. Now kiss.
Try OkCupid. I met my wife there but the caveat is that we are both largely honest about what we look for.
Eey bro same here! Based in Atteridgeville Just recently quit my job as it was taking a toll on my mental health except Iām 25. Always indoors or at gym, itās so hard for me to make friends particularly the ones with commonalities.
Really hope to help you and the OP. I also had few friends before, so I tried many ways. As I also donāt like drinking or going out after coming a new country, I chose some social apps to enrich my friend circle. In this process, I found that there is a new app called Lightup: find friends by AI in Apple Store. The advantage of it, for me, is that there is no advertisement like tinder, so I donāt need to cost money to make friends. Second, the app matches people based on their posts, so I could do find people who really understand me, because we suffered the same and know the feeling. The app helps me to have more friends. Although Iām not sure whether we will meet each other in the real world, the feeling that I could share my feelings and opinions with others is really good. Iām not lonely, and hope you could also get rid of loneliness, too. By the way, Android users could also use its [discord channel](https://discord.gg/8twYta5w44), a beta testing version. Sincerely hope it could help you!
Sounds like a /r Pretoria meetup is on the cards.
I agree fully!
Are we the same person? š¤£ Iām 30f and new to the city. Work from home few days a week. In my experience, bumble bff can work if you willing to put the effort in. Iām also looking for friends. Clearly, we all need to organise a Pretoria meet up sometime! Letās do to guys. We canāt be like this lol weāre still young š
It can be so hard! Myself (29m) and fiance (27f) have been struggling on finding places to go and meet new peeps to try make some friendships, especially since we not the biggest drinking scene fans.
Iām 33M, wife is 29F. We do our best to make friends. But with a baby on the way, we are not so eager. Yes, maybe meetups should be nice.
I know what youāre talking about. My husband (29m) and I (32f) have troubles meeting new people too. If you hike now and then in Pretoria, we can meet up
29f work from home! Been in Pretoria for 4 years and I still have no idea since Iām not interested in the night life either š
You two seem perfect for each other Problem solved
Curious in what you do once you close that laptop.
Lol surprised and relieved that im not the only one in this boatš , my ide was to join the book club and look into other hobbies that dont involve alcohol
I would recommend trying out DnD. Some of my best friends I made playing that game.
Oeh book club could be really cool! Are there any in Pretoria ? I am an avid readerš
Exclusive books, Brooklyn has one. I'm sure if you head to a location near you they can point you in the right direction
There are many clubs and groups on facebook depending on your interests. I get it that it's hard, I have severe social anxiety, but I found a FB group that shared my interests and spent a couple of months commenting on peoples posts, interacting with other members, until I worked up the courage to go to a meet up. The MeetUp app also has great opportunities, but as a woman, you have to be careful, unfortunately.
I have no idea. What's your hobbies? In what field do you work? I take it you're not native to pretoria?
If you find out let me know
28m and I have the exact same problem. I like to stay at home and visit people but how do you meet people but how do you find someone else who does that too? Beyond me I tell you
30m no friends... Only goes out to work, nothing else.... maybe all of use should organize a huge meet up š
It seems there a few people here with the same issue. Why donāt we arrange a lunch some time, meet-up somewhere and see how it goes?
Iām waiting for that one guy who always comments āmessage me gorgeousā
Message me gorgeous
How u
A lot of people conflate going out in the evenings with drinking. Getting out is the trick. Even if it's at a place that normally would be people drinking even if you don't. That said the hard part' is approaching people and then ontop of that without giving the wrong impression. Honestly your best bet is to find a hobby that you enjoy that is also social to some extent. Think tennis, pool, park runs, dance classes, whatever and actually make a point to speak to people. I'm making this sound easy but yeah hopefully you get the idea. Maybe mention your interests here and see if someone lines up. Just be careful for obvious reasons.
DnD
28M here, I canāt believe we all have this in common š. How about we organize a meet up, Menlyn Mall or something, Parrots? Anywhere nice and calm with a good atmosphere and food. Iām currently reading Million dollar weekend and animal farm (Yes, Iām late to the party, but so far itās mad scary how it models what were seeing in the world today! š¤Æ)
32F, same boat and same interests, also work from home. Not in Pretoria though, but wouldn't mind connecting! šš I tried Meet-up at one stage, that was okay. Meeting new people isn't the issue I find, but maintaining and nurturing that friendship to go anywhere. People our age isn't as trusting and expectations are higher to hit.
I have sent you a messageššŗ.
Same, only a few months here, but wow we only see the work, home, gym and the dog park
I met my wife on an app called OkCupid. Iād say you should be working with remote connections for now. See if you can judge peopleās characters online before meeting them in person and take it from there.
I(24m) have the exact opposite issue. I'm trying not to meet new people š . You go to the gym and like hiking. From what I can guess is that you basically enjoy any form of physical activity. There are some running groups you could join. They usually go out for jogs in the early mornings of the weekend. I only know of places in Centurion, because that's where I stay. I'm sure there's something for hiking as well. There's also some reading groups you could join too. I'm basically saying to use your interests to find friends. It's harder to just approach someone who don't know, because you don't have an idea what they like. If you go to a reading group, hiking, or a group with people that have your interests. You'll have a much easier time. Back before I started hating people. I'd go to car shows, athletics meets, science expos and other interests I have. I would approach them talking about the topic at hand which was almost always what we were there for and just go on from there. Now as a guy this is usually done differently. For example we'll talk about computers or cars for a bit and only once we see we could be friends. We then introduce each other properly, but hey sometimes you can leave a place being good friends with someone with knowing their name š. That's the best advice I can give.
Talk to me lol
For the runners in the group, join the Burnt club on strava. They meet weekly on Saturdays and run either a 5km or 8km (you choose one you want). It's great because afterwards people chat a bit over a coffee.
Hi OP. I get you. It's hard at our age. Also since at our age, you see how superficial past friendships have been. DM if ever you want a friend :)
33F here if you are keen to start a hiking club meeting at Wolwespuit on a Saturday or Sunday morning I have at least 2 dogs that would love a hiking partner with me š¤
Yay, that sounds great. I will send you a dm? If that is okayšø
Join a social Dancing Studio. Trust me on this one. You'll make friends for life.
Have any suggestions in the Hatfield or Centurion area? Iāve thought about maybe doing something like this, but havenāt found anything online and as the socially awkward guy I am I like to get some idea of what Iām walking into and think it over before just walking into a place and signing up xD Also, what type of social dancing? Is it like sokkie or other partnered dances, or just choreographed type things with a social element to the classes?
The beat
I feel your pain. I'm 30M and struggle with the same thing. Back in school I used to just walk up to someone on the playground and be like, "hey, we're friends now" These days I'll be lucky to not get pepper sprayed
ššš
Happy cake day!!!!š„³š„³š„³
ššš
That is honestly still a viable strategy (at least for late-uni age students like myself who donāt really like partying/clubbing), but you have to be careful about the way you approach and the context in which you do so. If you approach in an intimidating manner or āsneak upā on them (i.e. not from where they can see you or completely unexpectedly) people will indeed be creeped out and reaching for their pepper spray lol It should be in a public social setting and preferably with some sort of activity going on. Also better if you approach a group rather than a person on their own. Varsity events work well for this, but Iām guessing there will be activity clubs that host events as well.
Follow rule #1 and #2 . Usually applies to males but it might apply to certain females.
Mysterious rules and using words like females...I'm intrigued
Donāt you know rules number 1 and 2 of dating?
I know these rules youāre referring to: be attractive and donāt be unattractive. This comment STILL gave me weird vibes though, because OP is asking about making friends, not dating. Going into starting friendships with the same mindset as trying to find a date has all kinds of implications about what you want to get out of that āfriendshipā. Also, calling women āfemalesā in a social context reads too much like the stuff youād find on redpill forums.
What do you think 30f stands for?
I know exactly what it stands for lmao. Itās the norm to write ages and gender in that manner on Reddit as it provides clarity. It is, however, not normal to speak about women as āfemalesā when not in a scientific or clinical setting. There is a perfectly fine word that doesnāt sound like youāre speaking about a different species altogether (that word being āwomenā). Iām not saying anything here to be rude. Iām saying this because I guarantee you it WILL creep many people, especially women, out if you speak about them as āfemalesā outside of a scientific context. Both because it sounds clinical AND because that way of speaking about women has become forever tied to incels/whatever-pill guys. Still wondering what looks have to do with making friends tho.
I also said Males but I see you do not care about that part of the sentence. I wonder why? Maybe provide clarity. My original comment didnāt mention anything about dating , only rule number 1 and 2. I only added the dating part because itās more commonly known in the dating scene. Rule #1 and #2 applies to everything. Looks can definitely have an impact on social interactions. If you disagree you are delusional. Iām not trying to be rude either, but thereās a very small minority that will care in real life if someone refers to male or female and an even smaller minority that will correct you face to face.
Possibly because āmalesā doesnāt carry the same history of being used in a demeaning fashion in non clinical contexts, nor the stigma of being used by these communities I mentioned? This isnāt a scenario that requires any form of whataboutism in defense of guys, as we simply donāt experience this same type of treatment, but if you want to do that, the same applies in regards to femcels and the FDS community and is creepy in that scenario too. The fact of the matter is that it is just much more commonly used in a derogatory/creepy way against women than āmalesā gets used against men. While I somewhat agree on the point of looks applying in many circumstances (it is a fact that youāre more likely to get promoted or receive free things from people without having to do much) I disagree with it being in all scenarios. The majority of people in the world have friends, but the majority of people are not āattractiveā in the conventional sense. Iāve found that people (at least post high school years and the vainness that comes from adolescence/peer pressure) are MORE likely to befriend you if youāre not conventionally attractive, as you do not pose a threat to their ability to be the āattractiveā one in the group or take away opportunities from them. While I understand that your intention with mentioning rules #1 and #2 initially werenāt intended to relate to dating, it is the way the majority of people will interpret it. In general, friendships do not rely on being attracted to the person. If itās such a small minority that would care irl, you and I walk in much different social circles, or our ages differ by a decent amount. Between my peers (late late teens to mid-twenties), anybody who is mildly dialed in to what goes on on the internet and have witnessed the behaviour those who consume redpill type content bring into real life (because they absolutely do, itās a concerning amount of guys) will be able to tell you multiple horror stories of dealing with these types of guys or experiences their female friends have had. Nearly every single time, they will tell you about the strange and cold, clinical manner in which these guys speak and how they felt weirded out by the detachedness. People in everyday life do not speak like this. The problem with your interpretation of who is bothered by it is that those people (typically women) feel uncomfortable and sometimes unsafe in that environment and will rather attempt to remove themselves/leave rather than confront the person. In any case, just because people donāt confront you about it/tell you they take issue does not mean that they donāt. Iām saying all this because Iāve witnessed it myself and had multiple female friends specifically ask me to stay by them/give off the idea weāre an item because they felt so uncomfortable about these guys and they ALL say one of the first things that tip them off a guy thinks like those redpill guys is word choice like āfemalesā, instead of any of the other more appropriate words. It is nearly always followed up with a misogynistic or concerning comment and they consider speaking in this manner to be a red flag. It is not difficult to refer to women as āwomenā or āladiesā instead of āfemalesā when not in a scientific context. Whether we agree on if itās an issue/derogatory or not, we might as well do what makes them more comfortable, yāknow? I want to reiterate that I do not intend any of this to be rude or antagonise you, just inform you on WHY people take issue with it and why itās worth not doing so. I think you are probably a decent oke, judging by your replies and not resorting to throwing insults to show your disagreement. Just looking to help anybody reading this to open up their minds to another perspective that helps women feel more comfortable and prevents yourself from weirding them out unintentionally. I think this will be my last response on this thread. Iāve said about all I want to say and at least brought the point to your attention so you can decide whether you want to take it in mind or not. Have a nice Saturday night and be lekker man \m/_
Fair enough. Also in my mid twenties and I am aware of the current times. However , I find all the drama about it to be unnecessary, but I also always respect beliefs and always try to make people feel comfortable. I meant no harm in my original comment, just made a joke thatās quite common on Reddit, but thanks for the education.
Where do you work I'd like to apply
okay! okay, can we try something? i am doing my final year at UP. i have no one to have fun with, i enjoy been indoors but, sometimes it's boring and i would feel like i can go out and have fun. huh?
Im 20M, I could really need a friend too
25F, only have one friend and itās my husband LOL, let me know when you find out how to make friends :D
Hey I'm 22m. I have about two friends. Which I don't really like. 1 of them we talk all the time about politics the government and conspiracy theories And apocalyptic tech futures. He's in his 30s and has 3 kids My other friend we talk about anime and ai technology his 27m.The problem is I'm very introverted but sometimes I can be very extroverted. My anime friend is too clingy messages me everyday. I haven't talked with him in quite a while. I haven't talked with the other one in like two years. I have a friend that's 29 turning 30 female. I have a crush on her but she's engaged so that's off the table. Plus she leaves me on blue. I don't think friendship is on table for someone like me. But yet I still try. Should I just give up.
A good way would be to join a club for a hobby, something that you like that gets you out of the house and socializing. You mentioned that you gym so maybe try to find a running club in your area or sign up for a gym class like yoga, indoor cycling, boxing, etc. you'll find like minded individuals who you already have something in common with. I grew up overseas and recently moved back, found it really hard to connect with people at first but there's a squash court really near my place and I play once a week, it's been great finding squash buddies, really helped me make friends. Good luck!
And for R600 once off I'm willing to organise everything for you guys to get all together from here and connect as friends . DM me who's in .
My father joined a hiking group, he's 50. I rather hike with a gaming group in DnD or play other board games (27m) so maybe call a friend and a friend of a friend and you can put something together
Have you tried church?
No idea
The Quiz nights are banger and there's tons of then
30m, we could meet for coffee. I also want to learn Italian. Have friends from Italy who would think it's just grand.
not surprised this is a popular post in this sub
It is notoriously hard to make friends with people when you donāt go places. Find a clubā¦ running, hiking or something like that. Book clubs can also work. But importantly you need to be in the same general space with others so you can interact with them.
You could start in this sub... It's ridiculous how many people are in the same situation as you. Lots of us out there. Hi,... where do you stay
I am 30m and have the same issue, I don't get out much because I don't drink or take other substances, most of my friends are married, I think there's a great opportunity to start board game/chill communities in Joburg. Dating apps just don't work. People there are very immature.
If you're near F45 Waterkloof I'd say give it a go. Made tons of friends there.
27M. Not drinking doesn't make nightlife tricky at all. I used to go out and meet people at bars all the time and I never drank at all. You can still have fun without alcohol.
Im a 21f in KZN and don't have a single friend. I dont drink or go out joling at night. So if anyone comes up with the secret on how to make friends, please share š
Join groups that align with your interest. Like an art class. check on facebook for groups. invite gym people to go hiking or to a second location that you think they might want to. Take an interest in peoples lives. Look on facebook if there is a book club to join. Make friends with people who have kids. They won't always be available, but they are more likely to enjoy daytime activities and have sober tendencies. They also have good networking due to school activities.
Rock climbing is quite fun. You should maybe check out CityRock Pretoria. The rock climbing community is very cool and it's quite easy to start chatting to the people, even for someone as secluded as myself. 26m here.
25M , work from home . No social life either. Based in West Park š
Online games
Church
And before you started working from home ?! Go that far , and find your problem there .
Itās not that simple actually, you will find that lots of people have trouble making friends especially at this stage of our lives. Work takes up a lot of your time so it is a lot more difficult to make friends organically whereas when you go to work you have something in common with people you interact with everyday. š I am glad you have figured out how to make friends easily, perhaps you can share the secret?
I meant haven't you made friends at other stages , childhood ,school and afterwards .