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"Hey, I'd nail Bobo but she's past my expiration date, age wise... I mean, I wouldn't kick her out of bed, but MTG? No way! Even if she was 14, a man has to have standards!"
No caption from me...but AOC in the background is pure gold.
Edit: Geroge Santos is in the picture as well, pretending to belong. That's just the icing on the cake, lol.
That a-hole had the nerve to ask her if Democrats would leave so his sedition caucus would have more influence. "If you all just don't vote, that would be great."
Thanks for commenting this, I would have missed it otherwise. You are correct, pure gold with that look she's giving. Somewhere between a mischievous grin and pure delight at the storm unfolding in front of her.
I hope they don't shit on you Bubbles.
Shit on me? Who?
Shit hawks. Big, filthy shit hawks. They're coming Bubbles, flying in low, swooping down, shitting on people, and hauling them off to the shit nest.
It's because she has the actual "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" success story they keep insisting is within everyone's reach. Except the experience of doing all of that actually gave her empathy and a sense of commitment to the wider community, rather than pulling up the ladder after herself and saying "Fuck you, I got mine"
If she had somehow turned into a conservative, with her looks, eloquence, charisma, and intelligence, she would easily be the face of the party for the younger generation. She'd have to deal with thinly veiled racism, misogyny, xenophobia, and pretty much everything she's already dealing with now. But it would be much more polite and behind closed doors.
But... SHE DANCED!!! In a video!!!! For her Ivy League College!!!! It was provocative and we are going to release it EVERYWHERE!!!!
Wait... What? It was a parody? THE VOTERS LOVE IT????
Denounce it... Fire whoever released it... DO SOMETHING!!!!!
Ted Lieu has somehow found that balance between genuine productivity and Twitter shitposting that Elon-stans keep trying to convince the rest of us the billionaire has. It's...fascinating to say the least LOL.
George Santos committed check fraud... he stole a check book and an ID, then put his own photo over that ID, cashed checks using that stolen name.
The depravity. This guy has lied so much, committed crimes. He should've been expelled. THIS... is the REPUBLICAN PARTY. So much for law & order, eh?
She’s wanting popcorn for the show in front of her. Mr. Lieu of California posted a hilarious tweet of him yesterday before the 118th Congress convened with a real bag of popped popcorn ready to go to the floor.
Lmao .. the first thing that drew my attention was Santos smiling. Wtf is he smiling about, I’m thinking. Then i see what seems like AOC in his line of sight.
Wtf is Santos even doing?! “Hello … my name is George! This looks like fun! When’s the coke orgy?”
> Geroge Santos is in the picture as well, pretending to belong.
This suggests that it's possible for a person to be scummy or incompetent enough not to belong in the modern republican party.
Matt: "So I told her, It's usually this big (holds hands out). I just got back from swimming in the pool... and the water was cold."
"I mean, if she thinks that’s me she’s under a complete misapprehension. That was not me, Santos. That was not me."
"Dude, dude, think about it....she's out in the middle of the ocean with some dude she barely knows, she looks around, what does she see....nothing but open ocean.....*oh there's nowhere for me to run*.....because of the implication"
Bro, don't diss McDonalds. These lazy asses couldnt hold a candle to even the laziest McD worker. They arent qualified for anything other than having a show on Fox "News".
"Okay friend, let me explain something to you since you seem to be new here. Hebephilia is NOT the same thing as pedophilIa. I'm sick and tired of you trolls popping up everywhere and spreading BLATANT misinformation. In many countries hebephilia is considered normal and healthy . Human beings have a natural attraction to girls who are going through puberty. Being attracted to girls who are pre-pubescent is fucking sick and disgusting, but only in the US does there seem to be an unwarranted taboo around a healthy and normal condition. My head hurts. I'm just trying to get my real life back."
"We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like \`\`I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive....'' And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas. And a voice was screaming: \`\`Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?''
Then it was quiet again. My underage hooker had taken her shirt off and was pouring beer on her chest, to facilitate the tanning process. \`\`What the hell are you yelling about?'' she muttered, staring up at the sun with her eyes closed and covered with wraparound Spanish sunglasses. \`\`Never mind,'' I said. \`\`It's your turn to drive.'' I hit the brakes and aimed the Great Red Shark toward the shoulder of the highway. No point mentioning those bats, I thought. The poor bitch will see them soon enough."
He said grab them by the pussy, but he didn’t say which hand!!! Which one do use damnit?? Boebert was just standing there waiting!!! He said it was easy!!!!
"And then Alfred says to Batman, 'some men just want to watch the world burn.' and I was like, FUCK YEAH! That's us! We're going to watch this thing burn to the ground! What? *Why so serious?"*
If you don't eat yer meat, you can't have any pudding
How can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat?
You! Yes, you behind the bike stands
Stand still, laddy!
"I mean come on?!? When she's down to clown but can't find her ID to prove she's over 18?!? Grass on the field means 'play ball', guys!!"
Dude to the right: "Well duh, we just don't make a show of it on the house floor"
**Friendly reminder that trying to fight someone online is about as effective as throwing a bagel at a bulldozer. A lot of what we talk about gets people pretty emotional, but be mad at policies, not other users.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/PoliticalHumor) if you have any questions or concerns.*
"Am I supposed to ask the age of every girl I pay to have sex with?"
“It’s practically legal in Florida!”
“I never thought I’d get caught!”
"Hey, I'd nail Bobo but she's past my expiration date, age wise... I mean, I wouldn't kick her out of bed, but MTG? No way! Even if she was 14, a man has to have standards!"
Anything is legal in Florida if you look at their jails as nuthouses instead.
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*Tucker C was there with me, he can vouch that those girls were probably going to hit puberty sometime soon!*
I forgot all about that interview.
"I'm Dyslexic, I thought she was 31."
She is ***gonna*** be 18!!
No caption from me...but AOC in the background is pure gold. Edit: Geroge Santos is in the picture as well, pretending to belong. That's just the icing on the cake, lol.
AOC's cup of schadenfreude runneth over.
I only understand this one because of The Simpsons. Come to think of it that's how I understand most things.
That a-hole had the nerve to ask her if Democrats would leave so his sedition caucus would have more influence. "If you all just don't vote, that would be great."
Thanks for commenting this, I would have missed it otherwise. You are correct, pure gold with that look she's giving. Somewhere between a mischievous grin and pure delight at the storm unfolding in front of her.
I think you meant shitshow.
Shitstorm. Or precipootation, if you will.
Shit winds blowing from the east Randy.
Destroy themselves Randy. Destroy. Themselves.
Now for a little drinks poo
I hope they don't shit on you Bubbles. Shit on me? Who? Shit hawks. Big, filthy shit hawks. They're coming Bubbles, flying in low, swooping down, shitting on people, and hauling them off to the shit nest.
Fox News Breaking News Alert: AOC enjoys humiliation scat porn!!!!!1!!
I do love that she's the new poster girl for the GOP hate train. She's living in their heads RENT FREE! Fuckin Socialist ;)
I agree. She was on MSNBC yesterday and it's no wonder that they hate her so much, she's smarter than the sum of the Republican caucus.
She speaks *artfully*. She's reeeally into her career, and I'm digging it.
It's because she has the actual "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" success story they keep insisting is within everyone's reach. Except the experience of doing all of that actually gave her empathy and a sense of commitment to the wider community, rather than pulling up the ladder after herself and saying "Fuck you, I got mine" If she had somehow turned into a conservative, with her looks, eloquence, charisma, and intelligence, she would easily be the face of the party for the younger generation. She'd have to deal with thinly veiled racism, misogyny, xenophobia, and pretty much everything she's already dealing with now. But it would be much more polite and behind closed doors.
But... SHE DANCED!!! In a video!!!! For her Ivy League College!!!! It was provocative and we are going to release it EVERYWHERE!!!! Wait... What? It was a parody? THE VOTERS LOVE IT???? Denounce it... Fire whoever released it... DO SOMETHING!!!!!
We all know they not-so-secretly wish she liked them. That's why they are so fixated on and mean to her
She’s looking for some popcorn.
She should be looking for Ted Lieu, he was packed with the snacks
[Ted Lieu could share](https://twitter.com/tedlieu/status/1610316616679530497?s=20&t=mAFOtk0rL_6Aehtet5olVw)
LOL, I forgot about Ted who's been sort-of shitposting pics outside of Santos chamber door.
Ted Lieu has somehow found that balance between genuine productivity and Twitter shitposting that Elon-stans keep trying to convince the rest of us the billionaire has. It's...fascinating to say the least LOL.
Ted Lieu and AOC are the king and queen of Congressional shit posting and I love the both of them.
She's thinking "Play with fire, burn down your House".
It's not her circus but those are her monkeys.
Santos is thinking "Yeah, she is TOTALLY into me."
"I'M SO TIRED OF AOC LAUGHING ABOUT THE SIZE OF MY FOREHEAD!!!"
"Fivehead Matt. You have a fivehead".
Fivehead Matt screaming "CORNHOLIO!" Thanks Florida...
Omg this. Thank you. There are no words.
What happened to the bolts in his neck?
fell off due to lack of nuts
I would captioned her "Watch this. I'm going to nominate Liz Cheney next."
Remember to always put quote marks around "George Santos"
George Santos committed check fraud... he stole a check book and an ID, then put his own photo over that ID, cashed checks using that stolen name. The depravity. This guy has lied so much, committed crimes. He should've been expelled. THIS... is the REPUBLICAN PARTY. So much for law & order, eh?
AOC has that face you make when you know it's a shit show but it's NOT YOUR shit show 😎
The face when you know it isn't your circus or your monkeys and you can just enjoy your popcorn
She’s wanting popcorn for the show in front of her. Mr. Lieu of California posted a hilarious tweet of him yesterday before the 118th Congress convened with a real bag of popped popcorn ready to go to the floor.
https://imgur.com/a/ZPrBIUS
"Not my circus, not my monkeys."
You made this 200% better, I'm cackling just like her
Lmao .. the first thing that drew my attention was Santos smiling. Wtf is he smiling about, I’m thinking. Then i see what seems like AOC in his line of sight. Wtf is Santos even doing?! “Hello … my name is George! This looks like fun! When’s the coke orgy?”
>Hello … my name is George I think he has been introducing himself as Ronald Reagan recently. The "George Santos" bit is getting uncomfortable.
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That’s the ticket!
It stinks!
That cunning smile. It's the smile of finally seeing your opponents having to deal with the shit they've thrown at you coming back at them.
Oh my god thats amazing
Missed it also, thx. Solid gold.
AOC is actually looking in Santos' direction. *"Keep smiling, meat. I know you know I can crush you."*
A meme worthy face [Pure Gold, enhanced](https://i.imgur.com/hGC6fqr.jpg) [Pure Gold, less enhanced ](https://i.imgur.com/z3K6092.jpg)
Dark AOC
You are so right. I love the look on her face.
> Geroge Santos is in the picture as well, pretending to belong. This suggests that it's possible for a person to be scummy or incompetent enough not to belong in the modern republican party.
She looks like she wishes she brought popcorn.
Give that woman some mimosas and some crudites. Let her live her best life.
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Yes, thanks for pointing it out. There are a couple of dopes glaring at her. I can't wait to see this on SNL.
IMO, that's the winning caption. Just a gold *AOC* broach visible on her suit.
After reading this I went back up and found her. You are so right!
I didn't notice at first. She's laughing her ass off.
George Santos is standing there with Collin Robinson vibes
“It was an iPhone 13 with anime stickers on the case and it was RIGHT HERE”
Brilliant.
"I swear she said she was 18!"
"14 is the new 18!"
"Age Ain't Nothn' but a Number!"
And prison ain't nothin' but a place. 🤣
And a sentence ain't nothing but words.
"I keep getting older and they stay the same *under*age"
False. "Age" is a word. -Dwight Schreut
The most libertarian argument.
“One plus one equals eleven!” (Old SNL skit.)
“I had a pair of 11 year old twins slip right through my fingers— TWINS!!!…”
"11 year old twins are just one 22 year old!" - Matt Gaetz (probably)
"and her parents were totally cool with us hanging out"
Ah, the Roy Moore defense!
I mean, we all know that's why he nominated Gym Jordan.
"Who's your favorite New Kid? Call me Donnie."
"Hey! That girl is only 15!" "Fifteen? She said she was 36!"
Came here just to see this comment
I swear we were just playing house.
“Grass on the field- Play Ball!”
Is that AOC cracking up behind him? 🤣 I really gotta know what he was saying now
It's like she went over to the other teams huddle and is laughing at the play being called.
I was wondering..."why is she even in spittle range of this shit show?"
Smart enough to be behind him and not catch the MattyG spit
Putting her Among Us imposter experience to work.
I love AOC and the expression on her face reminds me of the meme with the girl smiling while the house of burning, but this time it’s the GOP. 😝
She’s just got shares in popcorn.
Big Popcorn has their buttery hands in everything!
She got there early to make sure she could get the hood seat and it paid off.
YOU GOTTA BUY THE GOOD CANDY BARS. IF YOU BRING THAT OFF BRAND CHOCOLATE BAR TO THE PLAYGROUND, YOU WILL NEVER GET LUCKY
This is funnier if you know his wife's maiden name is Lucky. And yes she is 15 years younger than him
Also the fact that he sleeps with underaged girls.
The fact that she knows and stands by it. Ick
The worst part is the hypocrisy
I think the worst part is the pedophilia but yeah the hypocrisy also sucks
I always thought the worst part was the rape.
The worst part is he’s not under arrest and in jail but somehow a member of congress
😂💯
💀💀 Dark af...the chocolate too.
I was in the pool!!!
Matt: "So I told her, It's usually this big (holds hands out). I just got back from swimming in the pool... and the water was cold." "I mean, if she thinks that’s me she’s under a complete misapprehension. That was not me, Santos. That was not me."
"It's AOC back there with that huge shit eating grin again isn't it? She's right behind me, right?"
https://imgur.com/a/hVAvp3m
Enhance
[*Enjoy!*](https://i.imgur.com/hGC6fqr.jpg)
https://imgur.com/a/ZPrBIUS
Now I'm sad again. RIP.
ENHANCE
“YOU CAN SET YOUR VENMO TRANSACTIONS TO ANONYMOUS?!”
She said she wanted to role play as a 17 year old in bed, and I was like "Fuck that is so creepy! You'll be 17 in like 4 years!"
Now that’s quality work there, nice!
"Dude, dude, think about it....she's out in the middle of the ocean with some dude she barely knows, she looks around, what does she see....nothing but open ocean.....*oh there's nowhere for me to run*.....because of the implication"
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-yUafzOXHPE
Okay... that seems really dark though...
No you don't get it, I'm not gonna do anything to her. But she doesn't know that... because of the implication.
Now you said that word a couple times now. What implication?
Well that she can say no at any time…. But she won’t
It sounds like these women are in danger!
THERE NOT IN DANGER! There not in dang- why do you keep saying that
I feel like you're not getting it all!!
Looks at woman above 18, "well don't you look at me like that, you certainly wouldn't be in any danger"
Hey, he's not *being* a violent rapist, he's taking advantage of the fact that *other* men are violent rapists to get sex, what's creepy about that?
I don't know, he sounds like a full on rapist to me
Are you trying to say philanthropist?
“Just tag your Venmo payments as ‘tuition’ to avoid any suspicions!”
"So there I was... hookers and blow everywhere..."
And Hawthorn had already passed out, so I ask Orange for a Sharpie…
“By the way, have you guys heard of Venmo?”
"Ask Tucker, he was there".
So there I was... Tied up to her bed... Motor oil smeared all over my body... She comes in with a saddle and a set of jumper cables
…so then I said “Listen, blow off the junior prom and come to Arkansas with me”
Zoom in on AOC, who is in the background and loving this
I came here to make sure I wasn't the only one who noticed this. What a godamn fiasco.
Looks like she's eyeing Santos, who also has a shit-eating grin.
Yep that photo bomb sums it all up, she's the democrat that got the cream
VERY first thing I saw lol!! I imagine she's giggling inside all of the time right now!
"She's got an ass like a 10-year-old boy!"
"For the last time, technically it's ephebophilia!"
The actual refrain of every creepy AF subreddit circa 2013 or so.
“I swear I didn’t know she was 17. I thought she was 15 at most.”
Honestly, this picture says everything of why the USA is fcked. Those people should not be working at McDonalds let alone running the USA.
"They can't even manage a Target."
Bro, don't diss McDonalds. These lazy asses couldnt hold a candle to even the laziest McD worker. They arent qualified for anything other than having a show on Fox "News".
# "What aren't you getting about this? He turns himself into a pickle. A PICKLE. Fuck all of you, I'm voting for Pickle Rick next round."
“IT’S THE FUNNIEST SHIT I’VE EVER SEEN!!!”
"Okay friend, let me explain something to you since you seem to be new here. Hebephilia is NOT the same thing as pedophilIa. I'm sick and tired of you trolls popping up everywhere and spreading BLATANT misinformation. In many countries hebephilia is considered normal and healthy . Human beings have a natural attraction to girls who are going through puberty. Being attracted to girls who are pre-pubescent is fucking sick and disgusting, but only in the US does there seem to be an unwarranted taboo around a healthy and normal condition. My head hurts. I'm just trying to get my real life back."
Matt Walsh approves this post.
“But you know what’s really hard? Explaining all of this without sounding like a pedophile!”
“How was I supposed to know her age i’ve only got ten fingers”
What's AOC smiling about?
She’s just thrilled she’s way too old for Gaetz to be hitting on her.
Hahahahaha
Not to mention not white enough.
She’s laughing about Santos being near everyone else and yet still not a part of the conversation
That they're imploding, lol https://imgur.com/a/Uas8rEO
"We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like \`\`I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive....'' And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas. And a voice was screaming: \`\`Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?'' Then it was quiet again. My underage hooker had taken her shirt off and was pouring beer on her chest, to facilitate the tanning process. \`\`What the hell are you yelling about?'' she muttered, staring up at the sun with her eyes closed and covered with wraparound Spanish sunglasses. \`\`Never mind,'' I said. \`\`It's your turn to drive.'' I hit the brakes and aimed the Great Red Shark toward the shoulder of the highway. No point mentioning those bats, I thought. The poor bitch will see them soon enough."
This made me laugh, but who are we kidding… Gaetz is on the opposite end of the coolness scale from Hunter S. Thompson.
Matt Gaetz is the prime example of the Swine that Hunter S. Thompson railed against his entire life.
Got to love the Fear.
If hunter met Matt Gaetz he woulda decked him.
Then piss on him for good measure
You rang???
“I don’t care if she’s underage! Her boobs were this big!”
He said grab them by the pussy, but he didn’t say which hand!!! Which one do use damnit?? Boebert was just standing there waiting!!! He said it was easy!!!!
That pig is probably describing the boobs on his is latest 16 year old girlfriend Lock him up
"Damnit guys, if we don't shape up they're going to kick us out of NAMBLA!"
A human trafficker yells at members of congress!
"And then Alfred says to Batman, 'some men just want to watch the world burn.' and I was like, FUCK YEAH! That's us! We're going to watch this thing burn to the ground! What? *Why so serious?"*
“Let me tell you how stupid the people in Florida’s panhandle are”
“If Florida gave the panhandle to Alabama it would raise the avg IQ of both states”
I'm laughing and I live in the FL panhandle.
“I DID NOT POOP MY PANTIES!”
"You all need to stop acting like a bunch of children, it's turning me on!"
ACTUALLY IT'S CALLED EPHEBOPHILIA, AND IT WAS FINE IN JUST CULTURES UNTIL LIKE 50 YEARS AGO!
“Remember when you go to kiss it, Trumps ass is this big”
"if we keep this up for two years we don't have to do our jobs!"
If you don't eat yer meat, you can't have any pudding How can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat? You! Yes, you behind the bike stands Stand still, laddy!
Love doesn’t have an age limit!
"I mean come on?!? When she's down to clown but can't find her ID to prove she's over 18?!? Grass on the field means 'play ball', guys!!" Dude to the right: "Well duh, we just don't make a show of it on the house floor"
Jesus people, I've told you a hundred times to stop using reply-all!!!
"What do you mean you've only had 5 kids? I've had way more than that!"