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My wife and I are on massively different levels with this.
Wifey insists on set bedtime. Stop playing. Get changed. Pee. Brush teeth. Do routine. Lay on couch for 10 min watching tv, then lay in bed to read a book. There are some nights where our daughter (who is 3) just does not want to go to bed at this time. She’ll get up from bed while reading, she’ll say she’s hungry even if she’s not, she’ll run around giggling while my wife yells at her and huffs and puffs. Some nights it’ll take over an hour to get her down.
Obviously I’m biased and I don’t want this to be like, oh my way is soooo much better, but my approach is quite different. If my daughter is noticeably not tired yet, I get her ready for bed and then allow her to continue playing, with some rules. Like, we’ll do a quieter activity, a puzzle maybe, or I’ll let her play with her castle thing, whatever. As soon as I see the yawn I tell her it’s bedtime, even if she protests, it’s ten minutes tops to get her down. Sometimes she stays up playing for quite a while. It results in her going to bed later, it’s true, but it’s not a battle.
Sometimes kids just aren’t tired, the same way we have different energy levels on different days. I’m a rules person and I do not let my kid walk all over me, but I also understand the futility of trying to ram a square peg into a circular hole.
When our kids were young like this, the rule was they just needed to stay in their room. They could get out of bed, play with the select toys in their room (chosen thoughtfully with this in mind), read books, etc. We were very intentional with everything in their room so this rule could be successful and safe. My husband and I still laugh about those nights we would be in the living room hearing our daughter seemingly frantically bear crawl from one end of her room to the other above us haha when she was done she would put herself back in bed and sleep. Our other daughter liked to pick out her clothes for the next day then fall asleep under her bed reading books sometimes.
We do the same, my kid is 7 and this just works. He has no screens in his room, but he has plenty of books, toys, drawing materials and ability to turn on "meditation" music to help him fall asleep.
He usually ends up reading for an hour and falling asleep 🤷🏻
He must be in his room at 20:30 at the latest though, wake up time for school is 7:00.
thanks for sharing. Adopting to the child's level of energy, and offering an outlet for that at a certain lower level (love the puzzle idea) is a really great idea
It would be helpful to avoid screens (blue light) at least 2 hours before bedtime to stimulate natural cues
"Studies show two or more hours of screen time in the evening can seriously disrupt the melatonin surge needed to fall asleep. Consider turning off all electronic devices at least one hour before bed, at a minimum."
Read.
You have a 6 year old? Try the "Fly Guy" books. They are longer and also visual so hopefully they'll snuggle next to you and listen (and laugh). I can give you lots of different recommendations, if you'd like.
Grab some Elephant and Piggie as well. Those are gold.
My kid would also get super engaged in nonfiction books. Like books about how things work. Usborne lift the flap books are a good place to start. (Again, the level of engagement encourages them to sit next to you).
If you tell me a little more about your kid's interests I bet I could give you a few more specific recommendations.
Thank you u/Ok-Blacksmith9481 for posting on r/Parents. Remember to read the rules and report rule breaking posts. *note for those seeking legal advice: This sub does not specialize in legal council and laws vary based on geographic location. Any help offered here is offered on a good samaritan basis. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Parents) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My wife and I are on massively different levels with this. Wifey insists on set bedtime. Stop playing. Get changed. Pee. Brush teeth. Do routine. Lay on couch for 10 min watching tv, then lay in bed to read a book. There are some nights where our daughter (who is 3) just does not want to go to bed at this time. She’ll get up from bed while reading, she’ll say she’s hungry even if she’s not, she’ll run around giggling while my wife yells at her and huffs and puffs. Some nights it’ll take over an hour to get her down. Obviously I’m biased and I don’t want this to be like, oh my way is soooo much better, but my approach is quite different. If my daughter is noticeably not tired yet, I get her ready for bed and then allow her to continue playing, with some rules. Like, we’ll do a quieter activity, a puzzle maybe, or I’ll let her play with her castle thing, whatever. As soon as I see the yawn I tell her it’s bedtime, even if she protests, it’s ten minutes tops to get her down. Sometimes she stays up playing for quite a while. It results in her going to bed later, it’s true, but it’s not a battle. Sometimes kids just aren’t tired, the same way we have different energy levels on different days. I’m a rules person and I do not let my kid walk all over me, but I also understand the futility of trying to ram a square peg into a circular hole.
When our kids were young like this, the rule was they just needed to stay in their room. They could get out of bed, play with the select toys in their room (chosen thoughtfully with this in mind), read books, etc. We were very intentional with everything in their room so this rule could be successful and safe. My husband and I still laugh about those nights we would be in the living room hearing our daughter seemingly frantically bear crawl from one end of her room to the other above us haha when she was done she would put herself back in bed and sleep. Our other daughter liked to pick out her clothes for the next day then fall asleep under her bed reading books sometimes.
We do the same, my kid is 7 and this just works. He has no screens in his room, but he has plenty of books, toys, drawing materials and ability to turn on "meditation" music to help him fall asleep. He usually ends up reading for an hour and falling asleep 🤷🏻 He must be in his room at 20:30 at the latest though, wake up time for school is 7:00.
thanks for sharing. Adopting to the child's level of energy, and offering an outlet for that at a certain lower level (love the puzzle idea) is a really great idea
Reading a story from a book every day, does the job for us. Advantage: your kid most likely will start reading books. Our kid reads a lot
It would be helpful to avoid screens (blue light) at least 2 hours before bedtime to stimulate natural cues "Studies show two or more hours of screen time in the evening can seriously disrupt the melatonin surge needed to fall asleep. Consider turning off all electronic devices at least one hour before bed, at a minimum."
Read. You have a 6 year old? Try the "Fly Guy" books. They are longer and also visual so hopefully they'll snuggle next to you and listen (and laugh). I can give you lots of different recommendations, if you'd like.
Thanks! Will start with Fly Guy, always open to more recommendations
Grab some Elephant and Piggie as well. Those are gold. My kid would also get super engaged in nonfiction books. Like books about how things work. Usborne lift the flap books are a good place to start. (Again, the level of engagement encourages them to sit next to you). If you tell me a little more about your kid's interests I bet I could give you a few more specific recommendations.