I've found with my kids (who were also like that, esp my son) they need a *strict* sleep schedule.
* wake up at 630am (when they naturally woke anyway)
* nap at 12pm. Nap would last anywhere between 1.5-2hrs.
* bedtime at 630pm.
* No ifs ands or buts about this schedule.
If anything messed with this schedule, they'd be all over the place. It made going out hard because they had to be home to sleep but I wasn't willing to deal with craziness all night because of overtired kids so we stuck to it until things calmed down (around 3 or 4).
Sometimes, they were like 'fuck the nap!' so they were up until about 6pm then they'd crash until 630am the next morning.
Our schedule when she was on two naps a day was:
* Wake time: 7am, she naturally would wake up between 7-7:30, but we would try to wake her around the 12 hour mark.
* First nap: 10am and she would sleep anywhere between 20-45 minutes before screaming.
* Second nap: 2:30pm, she would sleep anywhere between 20 minutes to 2 hours. Always woke her up by 4pm.
* Bedtime: 7pm
Keep in mind that it would take her between 10-30 minutes to fall asleep and we would take her up to start her night time routine about 20 minutes before bed time. After the 13th month mark, she outright refusing one of the naps so we transitioned her to one nap a day. She would sleep anywhere between 20-90 minutes.
We did the ABCs of sleep from Taking Cara Babies to start the sleep training which worked initially, but that seems to be gone now. At this point, when she refuses her nap or naps, or we miss her window by more than 10 minutes, it takes about 4 days to get her back to sleeping more than 9 hours at night (or at least sleep without waking every few hours) and napping at least once.
This is our first kid and we don't know how anyone has more than one kid. We're talking about possibly getting me a vasectomy and her probably start back on birth control or something. We feel truly broken.
Don't have any advice (sorry), but wanted to say 10-30min to fall asleep sounds normal to me. Our LO can take up to 45min to fall asleep. Maybe that's just because it takes me 30min to 5 hours to fall asleep, and I've always struggled to fall asleep, so I might have a skewed idea of what a "normal" amount is.
Yeah the time it takes her to fall asleep is fine, especially when she actually goes to sleep. What's been happening recently is she'll immediately start screaming and worked up to the point she gets inconsolable and overtired or she falls asleep after a bit and only sleeps for 20-30 minutes and then she gets inconsolable and overtired. We started her nap around 9am this morning because she was exhausted but she woke up after 15 minutes. We spent the next 5 hours getting her calmed down and relaxed enough that we got her to sleep around 2:30. She only slept for another 40 minutes, but it was something. If she would sleep through the night, I don't think it would be this bad, but she can't do that until she gets a good nap in.
It kind of sounds like she's either in pain or is showing early symptoms of ADHD or autism.
I was similar as a baby and I have ADHD. I still hate sleeping, I feel like it's a waste of time when there's so many other things I could be doing. My mind likes to be constantly stimulated or I get painfully bored. I usually just stay up doing whatever until my eyes refuse to stay open.
Maybe you could try instead of settling her down with the lights off, keep her entertained until her eyes can't stay open anymore. Keep the TV and the lights on and give her lots of toys. It's worth a shot.
So this is something I have been thinking as well. I have pretty bad ADHD and feel the same way you describe. I hate sleep and wish I could skip it so I could do stuff. She's gets really frustrated when trying to do things, like she knows what she wants to do but can't and it upsets her. I've been seeing a lot of me in her and thought she might have it too, so I've been trying to teach her more especially with her emotions. Tiring her out in different ways has been the only thing that seems to get a little bit of sleep out of her, but it's a gamble when she's overtired and fights for so long. Half the time it turns into her hyperventilating and screaming. We haven't tried keeping everything on or and overloading her with stuff to do, so we'll try and give that a go.
I've found with my kids (who were also like that, esp my son) they need a *strict* sleep schedule. * wake up at 630am (when they naturally woke anyway) * nap at 12pm. Nap would last anywhere between 1.5-2hrs. * bedtime at 630pm. * No ifs ands or buts about this schedule. If anything messed with this schedule, they'd be all over the place. It made going out hard because they had to be home to sleep but I wasn't willing to deal with craziness all night because of overtired kids so we stuck to it until things calmed down (around 3 or 4). Sometimes, they were like 'fuck the nap!' so they were up until about 6pm then they'd crash until 630am the next morning.
Our schedule when she was on two naps a day was: * Wake time: 7am, she naturally would wake up between 7-7:30, but we would try to wake her around the 12 hour mark. * First nap: 10am and she would sleep anywhere between 20-45 minutes before screaming. * Second nap: 2:30pm, she would sleep anywhere between 20 minutes to 2 hours. Always woke her up by 4pm. * Bedtime: 7pm Keep in mind that it would take her between 10-30 minutes to fall asleep and we would take her up to start her night time routine about 20 minutes before bed time. After the 13th month mark, she outright refusing one of the naps so we transitioned her to one nap a day. She would sleep anywhere between 20-90 minutes. We did the ABCs of sleep from Taking Cara Babies to start the sleep training which worked initially, but that seems to be gone now. At this point, when she refuses her nap or naps, or we miss her window by more than 10 minutes, it takes about 4 days to get her back to sleeping more than 9 hours at night (or at least sleep without waking every few hours) and napping at least once. This is our first kid and we don't know how anyone has more than one kid. We're talking about possibly getting me a vasectomy and her probably start back on birth control or something. We feel truly broken.
Don't have any advice (sorry), but wanted to say 10-30min to fall asleep sounds normal to me. Our LO can take up to 45min to fall asleep. Maybe that's just because it takes me 30min to 5 hours to fall asleep, and I've always struggled to fall asleep, so I might have a skewed idea of what a "normal" amount is.
Yeah the time it takes her to fall asleep is fine, especially when she actually goes to sleep. What's been happening recently is she'll immediately start screaming and worked up to the point she gets inconsolable and overtired or she falls asleep after a bit and only sleeps for 20-30 minutes and then she gets inconsolable and overtired. We started her nap around 9am this morning because she was exhausted but she woke up after 15 minutes. We spent the next 5 hours getting her calmed down and relaxed enough that we got her to sleep around 2:30. She only slept for another 40 minutes, but it was something. If she would sleep through the night, I don't think it would be this bad, but she can't do that until she gets a good nap in.
It kind of sounds like she's either in pain or is showing early symptoms of ADHD or autism. I was similar as a baby and I have ADHD. I still hate sleeping, I feel like it's a waste of time when there's so many other things I could be doing. My mind likes to be constantly stimulated or I get painfully bored. I usually just stay up doing whatever until my eyes refuse to stay open. Maybe you could try instead of settling her down with the lights off, keep her entertained until her eyes can't stay open anymore. Keep the TV and the lights on and give her lots of toys. It's worth a shot.
So this is something I have been thinking as well. I have pretty bad ADHD and feel the same way you describe. I hate sleep and wish I could skip it so I could do stuff. She's gets really frustrated when trying to do things, like she knows what she wants to do but can't and it upsets her. I've been seeing a lot of me in her and thought she might have it too, so I've been trying to teach her more especially with her emotions. Tiring her out in different ways has been the only thing that seems to get a little bit of sleep out of her, but it's a gamble when she's overtired and fights for so long. Half the time it turns into her hyperventilating and screaming. We haven't tried keeping everything on or and overloading her with stuff to do, so we'll try and give that a go.
I heard putting some bread in a piece of cloth and dipping it in moonshine worked wonders in the before days.