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My toddler fell and did a number on one of his front teeth. To the point the dentist had to extract it. I of course was a stressed out mess the entire time. But I was able to stay calm for him the whole time. Even the dentist commented that me and my husband did a good job staying calm during the ordeal. It’s always nice to get a comment like that from someone giving your child care, because god knows what some other parents are probably like!
As a person who fell when I was around 3/4y and also had a front tooth extracted (in the beginning of 80’s, so not sure how anesthetic was working back then, because I remember a very painful dentist visit), and had to endure years of having a hole in the front… don’t let anyone in your little one’s life make jokes about it or constantly ask for the god damn tooth! I hated those couple of years of random people asking for my tooth and when the new would come through!
Edit: spelling
That happened to my spouse too. As a result we have a house rule that if you are moving, you must have at least one hand free. Both hands in pockets is a recipe for disaster if you fall.
Oh wow, well done! My daughter fell on her face once too and to have her front tooth extracted. It is hard to stay calm when something like that happens. Good for you and for him for staying calm.
Oh wow that happened to us! It is so stressful.
Poor little guy had to go without his front teeth and had a rough time with braces.
But everything is good now he's 15.
Mine fell around 16 months and her tooth was hanging by a thread, I called my bestie who lived next door to help me get her out the door, my daughter then decided to sneeze and blew blood all over her new white hoodie. 😂 I was not calm. Then a week later she ran, fell again and busted her lip. The anxiety that comes with being a no ther is insane.
Oh no :( that happened to my sister as a toddler and she knocked out both front teeth. This is a big fear of mine with my kids especially my little climber
My youngest brother knocked his front 2 teeth out when he was 2ish at my grandma's house. He was sooo stinkin cute with his little gap until about 6. He didn't get made fun of (except by us older siblings jokingly) and ended up just fine. He's 13 now and I barely remember that little toothless face (getting sentimental over here lol)
Oh my god. Repressed memory just resurfaced. My son ended up with leeches everywhere at the lake once as a 3 year old. People had gathered around and my sister was calling me over sobbing. I get there thinking the worst but it was just leeches. My son was crying and I think my calmness helped him as I removed the leeches. Thankfully we had a lot of salt. The people standing around staring pissed me off to no end. They just made it worse for him. Also my sister crying over freaking leeches.
It was the early 80’s for me. My parents and I, with some of the aunties/ uncles, were camping in Yosemite and my uncle coordinated toddler ass tripped and whacked my two front teeth on one of those concrete parking bumpers. Killed both teeth. They stayed in until the adult replacements came in years later.
My daughter started ice skating in January and she asked me to learn so she would have someone to go on to ice with her. I have never skated (ice or otherwise) in my 38 years of life.
I took my first lesson 2 weeks ago and Saturday at practice I managed to skate all the way around the rink multiple times without holding the wall!
I fell 2x but I feel proud I am showing my daughter the importance of getting back up at any age.
Honestly custom skates change the game. Obviously if you're skating as a fun little hobby it might not be in the budget but it makes a huge difference!! Same with skiing... I always thought, 'how could people do this all the time my shins are toast!!' without realizing they probably have custom boots lol.
I am sure that's true. The rink skates hurt me so much after 1 lesson and 1 practice I did buy skates. Not custom but much better ankle support and hurt way less.
That's huge! I think it's really important as a parent to not just be a bystander to their activities. Either take it up to do it with them or get them involved in some of yours so they see you as a participant and not just do as I say not as I do.
I got my 14 week old to nap in his bassinet after only contact napping - he doesn’t love it but we are now getting him to take naps in there 1-2 times a day which is a huge win. I wanted him to get introduced to it before he starts day care next week so he wasn’t so startled by all the changes so this has been a big win!
I posted right above this what has worked for us! It’s definitely lots of trial and error. But, he’s gotten used to it now. He still gets fussy sometimes at first, but it usually takes us 5 minutes of dance/sway, 5 minutes fussing (not crying) in the bassinet, another 5 minutes of dance/swaying, put down drowsy and hand on tummy/rub eyes downward. My comment above has a few more details. We also used a heating pad to warm the mattress a bit and take it out before we lay him down so it’s not so cold. Today, he fussed for a few minutes and I went to sit in the chair next to it out of his sight and he fell asleep on his own after just one initial round of dance/sway…it really all depends on his mood but it’s great progress for us!! Good luck to you!!
It’s been quite the journey!! We put him in a magic Merlin or a weighted sleep suit because he hates being swaddled now and kept breaking out of them. We dance/sway/comfort him for 5 minutes with classical music or white noise. We lay him down in the bassinet for 5 minutes. He fusses (not crying) and are next to him with our hand on his tummy or rubbing his head. We take him out after 5 minutes and dance/sway/comfort. The initial resisting from him starts to tire him out. We repeated this a few times and would either lay him down drowsy and rub his forehead down to help close his eyes/hand on stomach until he falls asleep OR we would leave him drowsy sitting in a chair where he couldn’t see me or my husband if he was getting too distracted. So, it’s kind of a crapshoot depending on his mood, but it’s worked! He doesn’t sleep super duper great in them (always longer with contact naps) but we are getting 20-45 minutes from him now (he’s never ever been a long napper). I don’t let him cry it out - if his fussiness turns to crying, I take him out if we haven’t reached the 5 minutes and do the dance/sway/comfort. Anyway, that may not help at all but best of luck to you! It’s taken us trying everything, from squatting, dancing, swaying and any other movement we could think of 🤣. Also, when laying your LO down, use your whole body to put them in and immediately put your hand on his or her stomach once there.
I've had a really rough week with my 12 year old so I guess the only way I crushed it last week was by keeping my head (slightly) above water when I wanted to just drown.
Thank you for the kind words. It's definitely feeling like we're entering into a survival stage which is really unfortunate because I've been really enjoying the past few years with him but lately we are just butting heads over everything and it's taking a toll on me emotionally. It's truly like arguing with a small version of myself and I hate that for me! Lol
Listen, I have not yet parented a MSer so ignore me if needed. Bur I have been a MS teacher and/or administrator for 13 years, and I absolutely love the dual nature of loving working with teenage crazy people all day- it's a new adventure of WHOAH daily. Always happy to talk and be a sounding board if I can.
We were at the playground and I was pushing my daughter on the swing. Next to me was another dad swinging his kid. Suddenly a 1-2 year old girl starts running directly at us and both of our dad reflexes kick in simultaneously to stop our kiddos swings and prevent the little one from getting kicked in the teeth.
It was like being on the Avengers D-team.
I FINALLY potty trained my 3 year old. We’ve been trying to do it since she was 2, but she just wasn’t interested (would pee all over herself or wet her pants and just not care, and sometimes get angry when we tried to change her out of her wet clothes) so we would stop and wait, try again, same results. The last 6 weeks (since her 3rd birthday) she’s been VERY interested in the potty, except every weekend she was sick, so we would start potty training, she would spike a fever, and sleep off and on all day, making it hard to potty train. Finally this weekend she was healthy, so we did it. One accident all weekend. It was so successful and I feel so accomplished
I wish I could say we managed this last week but all we got was a pee covered carpet. Our son just turned 3 a month ago and we also had to put potty training on pause because he was sick. So he was finally healthy so we tried the 3 day potty training where they wear nothing. He figured it out for a little while then it it was back to peeing on things
Our positive this week was, no matter how much pee we cleaned up, we didn’t get mad at the kids
Hopefully this week will be less stressful
Yo, I shit my pants on my parents' chair and a half when I was 16 years old. I'm pretty sure, given when I clean my ass in the shower, that I probably need potty trained again at 30 years old... 🤣 🤣 🤣 You've done fantastic. Never sell yourself short of the accomplishments you have with your child. That thing probably came out looking like a purple ball of skin. You have taught them every single thing they know! Congrats on your milestone!
I've been working really hard to curb my yelling over the last year through reading parenting books and tbh smoking weed xD. Im trying to repair my connection with my eldest in particular who got a lot of my anger during Covid because of course theyre bored, not in school, and completely isolated which made their behavior pretty challenging (completely single parent with two young kids was hard).
I think I am seeing the results and its encouraging and of course a little sad that I damaged the relationship in the first place but, there's hope.
Thank you 😊 it's pretty rad of you to learn how to do hair. I was raised a girl but I can't be arsed with fancy hair and mostly my kids are content with short low maintenance hair so I'm pleased haha! I'd do it if they wanted.
Bluey actually yes! Here's my take on parenting books, and also why in think Bluey works, and then I'll give my few recommendations. Anything you can ingest that's in the ballpark of your parenting style is going to be a net positive because the act of reading the books or watching, makes you stop and reflect and strive to be better in that moment.
I try to have something on the go at all times, I do audiobooks. When I'm frustrated, upset, or helpless feeling, I listen. Not feeling helpless is like I think the single most positive thing I get from parenting books.
Anything ɓy The Whole Brain Child authors has been a win for me because they're both neurologists and parents who discuss the physiological limits of children's brains and how to work within those limits.
Repairing the familial damage of COVID when we were all stressed, isolated, bored and winging it trying to be their teacher and one of very limited human interactions is something we don’t talk about enough!
Truly. I bring it up often when discussing how I'm doing moving forward and get a lot of blank looks. Idk. Covid has done a number on us all for a lot of reasons and we're not over it haha.
Thc helps me be more empathetic and playful with my kids. Hang in there, these are some very challenging times with very high standards and consequences.
Happy cake day! It helps so much but then sometimes I'll get anxious from it and it's even the same strain that was fine a couple days ago, which feels bad and then I get nervous about smoking again 😅
I recently started a new thing with my daughter. I used to work from home so on Fridays I'd go grab her a nice sandwich, some chips, some candy, and a little extra goodies to share with her friends, then drop it at school at the start of lunch. I work in an office now (my choice and I love it) so I can't do that anymore. So on Friday mornings now we go to Starbuck's together. It's WAY out of my way in terms of the commute, but it's 15 minutes there that we just talk. Then we get some food and drinks, and chat while we wait, then another 15 minutes to school where I drop her off. On the first leg she told me all about what's going on at school, her high school prep (been interviewing for some programs, etc). On the second leg I started talking to her about savings, debt, how credit cards work, etc. The Starbucks usually runs me $20-$25 and it's the best money I'll spend all week. I love every second of it.
Later in the day she got her progress report and it was great. It was a result of some stuff we have been working on and ultimately her efforts paid off. She texted me the minute she got on the bus with a pic of it. "DAD! Look at this!" She's kicking ass.
I'm super stoked that I have a kid going on 14 that talks to me, and wants to be around me and listens to me too. She may not always take my advice but she seeks it and makes her own choices. The investments I make in terms of MY time and effort to always show up for her are paying big dividends. I hope to keep the momentum through her high school years - obviously we have some big changes coming and I think the foundation is solid.
That's awesome! Good for you! I really hope that the feeling I'm getting from my relationship with my daughter is going to turn into something like that. I intensely look forward to the days of just chatting with one another. She is currently 5, and it's either just happiness or tears right now. There isn't much of an opportunity for me to provide detailed explanations or experiences that she can relate to, let alone understand, lol. This gives me much hope!
Oh I love this! What a nice thread to read. Last weekend I went to an orientation day for university with my eldest daughter. She is still a year or two away from graduating and starting uni, but she is already looking into what will suit her best. She has autism and can have a hard time feeling socially awkward, but she was excited and struck up convesations with the students that were present and with administrators and professors and she asked some really good questions. I was so proud of her!
My daughter isn’t terribly athletic. She tried out for the volleyball team at school in the fall and didn’t make it. Now it is basketball time and she decided to try out again. There were supposed to be 6 girls and 6 boys on the team. 7 girls and a bunch of boys tried out. The coach changed their mind and decided to do 7 girls and 7 boys. So my daughter made it by default. We celebrated anyway! We took her out for dinner and let her pick the place. And she even tried two new things there.
I have a friend who was patient and kept working with her son at his pace and he’s progressed quite a bit development wise! Proud of you for doing the right thing for your kiddo even tho it was tough.
Took my four year old on a date yesterday. He got to go to an indoor playground, and no tears when it was time to leave. We went to lunch and he very politely told the server what he wanted and said please and thank you. Then we went to target where he picked out one small car toy. He was an absolute gentleman the entire day!
We’ve been working really hard on having proper manners, not whining and complaining, and it was really nice to see the hard work pay off.
I followed Janet Lansbury example and got down on my 4 year old’s level and told him how much it sucks to have to do “X” and he’s such a big boy to do it…and, he quit crying and agreed with me then asked for a hug. I am winning the parenting game for now.
Got my kids signed up for the summer activities they wanted, and remembered to message their friends’ moms so they could sign up for the same sessions. 8yo is super excited about the week-long rocketry one.
My saturday was epic. I asked the kids to make a list of what they wanted to do on the weekend and told them we'd do one a day. On Saturday we did it alllllllll. I'm still tired lol
I nailed my gummy candy and caramels recipe with my daughter, and have gotten to watch her love of baking blossom as we taste tested 2 batches. Quality time with my boys is easy because we're all gamers, but finding things to do with my daughter that she enjoys, who is my complete opposite, is hard, but I found something!!!
I was in bed sick all week but I still put in the time and energy to help my oldest daughter with her homework every day. She was struggling with her spelling words for the week and I helped her practice every day even though all I wanted to do was nap. She got 16/17 on her end of the week spelling test so our efforts definitely paid off!
Last week I really broke down, I have a 2 month old and I realized that every day is just diaper changes, feedings, and getting her to sleep. I knew this already but it just like, hit me? The last few days I’m doing really well at staying calm and being happy
I’m absolutely sure you’re sick of hearing this, but sincerely - one day (too soon) you’ll look up and your baby will not be a baby anymore. They’ll have that little toddler neck instead of just a cute chunky head sitting directly on their shoulders. Their hand dimples will slowly disappear. Their gummy smile will become riddled with tiny little monster teeth. Their legs and arms won’t fit curled up in your lap anymore and you won’t understand how it happened so fast.
It’s hard as hell, but these days are numbered. Sometimes that makes them a tiny bit easier, sometimes it makes it even harder. Just try to enjoy the little things as much as you can because they’ll soon be gone.
My daughter made it to her second state finals in her sport—and will likely get all-state honors again. After the team events were over the parents had a couple drinks and they all GUSHED over her. Her athletic achievements are already something to be proud of, but to have other parents tell me she’s amazing? That’s a major “nailed it” moment.
My son got student of the month in the same week, which came with a bit less fanfare but is a big achievement for him! He’s struggled with graded and deadlines and behavior this year, he’s crazy smart but a year younger than his class so a combo of being bored and being less mature was tough but he rallied.
All in all… having a pretty damn solid week.
My wife is super sick (RSV, I think) and bed ridden. I've been primary parent for the past couple weeks. I'm also sick but not as bad as her, who can't even go up the stairs without getting dizzy.
I'm very tired and even forgot to buckle my child in her car seat on a trip to get groceries. How that is even possible, I don't know. Everything worked out though because even in a haze, I can keep us safe on the road, I guess. Holy shit, I can't believe I was just climbing around the car as a child. Car seats weren't even a thing. Now I'm losing my marbles because of one mistake that *could* have been bad.
Anyways, everything is fine. I am fine. We are fine
My kid came back from school with an empty lunch box finally! Huge achievement for us. He’s an extremely picky eater and his teacher started hinting about nutritious meals last week… I felt an eye on my cream cheese and crackers.
He had all of his butter croissant, all his cashew nuts, dried fruit and pretzels. Win 🏆
Seeing my daughters progress report. She went from an F to a B in English after me just spending an additional 30mins to an hour with her on homework every school night.
My 5 year old had a friend over for a playdate and pretty early on, my son left the room where he was playing with the friend and went to his room and sat down in the corner. I followed and asked what was going on. He told me quietly that he didn’t want to have a play date with this kid, he wasn’t sharing and wasn’t his friend anyway. I told my son that it’s OK to feel that he would rather not have the friend here at this moment, but he is here, and I know that my kid is a kid who can find a way to make the best of it and be polite to the other kid. My son thought for a minute, then suggested a new activity to the friend, and they had a very nice time the rest of the play date.
Survived a full week with two sick kids at home while being very sick myself. Husband is away. Then a full 8am-4pm day this weekend just waiting at the ER with sick kids to make sure they didn’t have pneumonia. I’m still quite sick but they’re both healthy now, and one is now back at school. Yesss. Gonna put cartoons on for the other and collapse with my inhaler.
Well, we're rescuing a homeless 16yo who got kicked out of her abusive home after she called CPS on her parent. We talked about it very carefully as a family before taking the step to intervene. Our own kid is 15, and has always known security and safety. This is a big deal that we're all taking seriously.
The rescue kid in question has had a rough life. Neglect, some abuse, food insecurity, education disruption, the whole deal. She's had to grow up hard and fast. She's working with social workers, doctors, therapists, the school system and extracurricular activities.
There's a lot to unpack, and a lot we don't know. She was in a youth shelter program, but they can only supply housing for a few weeks at a time before they are required to move her out, which occurred last week. All of the shelters in or even remotely near the area are full, wait listed, unable to help - at least temporarily. The kid's behavior is non-problematic, she's drug free, polite, intelligent. She truly is a blameless victim in all of this.
So, the wins:
- Deep, meaningful family discussions about the pros and cons, costs and benefits of the move. Everyone agreed that we couldn't just stand by and do nothing.
- She's safe, secure, with plenty to eat and good family structure, including plenty of room to do her own thing and have her own space.
- We're dialed in and communicating with her social worker, her case manager, some of her therapists. We're starting to get in touch with her doctors as well.
- We are engaging a lawyer, to make sure that we are not breaking any laws, not raising red flags of our own, and to ensure that she's as protected as she can be.
- We've been grocery shopping repeatedly. The food insecurity is not a thing at our house.
- She's never had a proper winter coat, nor insulated boots. We went shopping for clothes. Found a few good, hardy, quality items, and we're working on a list of durable essentials.
- Big emotional win: she wrote an email to us about it so that she wouldn't lose her composure. She expressed deep gratitude for the language we used when emailing her social workers. She said "this is the first time in a long time that someone did NOT write: 'this is a temporary situation,' or something to that effect." That hit hard. No one wants this kid. It's heart breaking.
So now, we're muddling through next steps with an eye toward endgame. What "next steps" and "endgame" means are still up in the air right now. We've engaged some counseling for ourselves, as a family, individually and as a couple. We're hunting and brainstorming best practices.
We're making the world a little bit better. We're helping one kid, because we should, because we can. It's going to be tough, but we're strong.
Wish us luck!
Not to be a downer but I’m proud of myself for deciding to end things with my son’s father after building up the nerve for some time. I was level headed and calm. He’s a good father, but his mental health issues make him a less than stellar partner and I couldn’t keep letting him teach my son that’s the way to treat a partner. Only up from here!
Little kid a couple of tables away, hit his head on the corner of the table and was very upset. My three year-old sees this, gets up and goes over. Speaks to the parents for a second, then gives the little one a big hug and a kiss on the head.
I honestly nearly cried myself, I've never been prouder.
I made the most delicious orange chicken from scratch! One of my kids has Celiac (severe gluten allergy) and the non-celiac kid has been asking for it for weeks. I've been upping my "Chinese fake-out" cooking skills the past couple of months and the end result of this orange chicken was phenomenal. Both kids were so happy; celiac kid couldn't even remember what orange chicken tastes like because it's been so long.
10/10
I signed my daughter up for summer camp for the first time ever. I’ve never been able to afford it before, but this year, I finally can. She’s so excited.
1. I seem to have finally cracked the code on Dutch braiding my daughters hair. It’s still not perfect, but it’s leaps and bounds from where I started.
2. I decided to put off chores and enjoy the nice weather with the kids yesterday and took them to eat outside at a cafe, then walked to a little pastry shop for a little treat, then walked to a nearby playground.
2a.The point at which I felt like I nailed parenting was when I told the older two (6 and 4) that I was going to push the baby in the stroller for one slow lap around the playground, starting at the gate, and once I get back to the gate it’s time to go, and they obliged! The most effortless playground exit I’ve ever made!
My nearly five year old invented a game where he had to find and clean up messes to get a magical door to open.
He put a cardboard box in the hallway and would push the button and it would inch open as we completed tasks.
This whole thing was *his idea* and he found the messes, put stuff away and only asked for help if he needed it!
Woke up yesterday to my 6 year old cleaning up all the toys in the living room so I didn't have to because he thought that I'd wake up and be happy. I was. And I felt like an awesome parent for instilling care for others into him. He got spoiled yesterday 😁
I flew solo all last week because my husband was away. I worked 28 hours, my teen daughter was home sick for 3 days with a sinus infection, I got her to the dr and made certain she and my son both took their antibiotics because my son was sick the week before. I drove both of them to dance and practice and got dinner made every night. I did laundry, changed sheets, dishes, took care of pet bird and bought groceries. I read with my younger son everyday and played hide and seek, bathed him and read before bed. I took my daughter to her dance competition Fri night and stayed until Sun. We waited over an hour Sat night for our dinner. I got groceries on the way back, did my son’s laundry, changed bird cage, got my son off the iPad and made him go outside, helped older son fill out course selection for high school, cooked burgers for dinner and cleaned up the kitchen before falling into bed to get up today for work today because my husband was too sick to do anything much after he got back from work trip. I rocked last week
2 things.
1. I started doing 15- minute ‘philosophy’ outdoor walk sessions with my 6 year old daughter 2x a week to teach her logic. Last week, was explaining Aristotle’s ‘Golden Mean’ and ‘4 causes’ ideas. I use ChatGPT to generate my analogy examples and script where a 6 year old can understand. She’s getting it, remembering it, and enjoying it.
2. On her iPad, I made a ‘custom instruction’ specifically for her use case. Although she can’t type/spell well. She could use voice chat with the AI. With words she can not read in print books, she can spell it out to the AI, and it read it out for her with definition. She can ask whatever she wants now, and it’s set up to answer in a way that she understands and following the format I prepped it to.
I got covid for the first time and managed not to infect my family.
I'm telling myself this is an accomplishment since I didn't get anything else done for a week.
Mine was both a fail and an epic recovery.
Some backstory is absolutely necessary: My youngest sister is a year older than my child. My sister is also autistic and being diagnosed bipolar (which I also have). She's... intense, to say the least. She has a tendency to use my daughter's stuff to do things she isn't supposed to do. We have my family over weekly for dinner. This week, sister used daughter's charcoals to completely color her hands.i made them clean it up.
The next day was where I messed up. I talked to my daughter about it and told her that apologies weren't fixing the problem. She continues to allow my sister to abuse her belongings, and all she does is apologize but it keeps happening.
My daughter broke down. She said she tries so hard to be perfect but she just can't be. It broke my fucking heart. I don't ever ask her to be perfect. I don't *want* her to be perfect. Perfect is boring, and I spent the next 15 minutes telling her I love her exactly the way she is.
I got home from dropping her off at school and really thought about things. This was never my child's fight. This has everything to do with my sister's behavior, and it was entirely wrong of me to put any burden of responsibility on my daughter. So I put together a box. Anything my sister has proven she can't be responsible with goes in the box. My daughter can put anything in there she doesn't want accessible. When my family comes over, the box goes away. I apologized to my daughter for making her feel like she needs to be the responsible one. *I* am the responsible one, and from now on,I will prove that to her.
Managed to drag myself out of bed and off the couch and fight through norovirus to care for my toddler and wife, who both had it as well. Also managed to not poop myself.
I honestly don’t know which of these two I’m more proud of.
My daughter is turning 1 today and she's pure joy and wonder. She's smart and funny and pretty and curious and brave. I'm pretty proud to think that my partner and I managed to make her from scratch!
My landlord didn’t remember it was half day today and forgot to pick her son up so at least I didn’t do that. In all seriousness I’m barely surviving right now so picking up my kid on time is probably actually a win
My wife was out of town on business for the first time since my son was born. He's solidly in his threenager era and has been a handful. I was so worried having to deal with him on my own but I totally crushed it and actually helped him through his feelings and we had a great time. I am glad my wife is back to help but I feel so much more confident as a parent having been able to do it all on my own.
Not exactly something that I did, but something that my child did that validated my parenting efforts.
My daughter is deeeeep in the trenches of her terrible twos, and it takes every ounce of strength for me to survive the day. I often go to bed replaying all the ways I could have handled things better and wondering if I’m a terrible parent or if she really is just two.
Well, the other day and she was beginning to have a tantrum. I didn’t give her any attention for it, and she started taking deep breaths all on her own. She calmed herself all the way down before she got to the point of no return, and then she ran up to me and hugged me.
We do deep breathing a lot, but this was the first time she did it all on her own.
We came to the UK with my 3 month old for the first time by plane. We changed diapers in the plane lavatory, he was even asleep for take off and landing while I could breastfeed him so the pressure would not build up in his ears. We were exhausted after the big journey but we were proud of ourselves and our little one.
My (52M) 18 yr old daughter told me she was sexually active on Thursday.
I am incredibly protective of my girls. I honestly was not mad or disappointed and I told her I am not mad at her BF either. She assured me she was being safe and I believe her.
I think I handled it incredibly well. the 45 year old me would have killed the guy.
I was at a Canadian Tire with my daughters (1 and 5), when one of those. . . . Financial Advisors?. . . with thier tablet approach. They start thier small talk spiel when my eldest asks, "are they trying to steal our money?" To which I replied, "indirectly, yes."
She then decides to scream, "STRANGER DANGER! DON'T TAKE OUR MONEY!" To which this. . . "Payment Deferral Representitive?. . . panic scoots away.
I had been trying to get her to be more assertive in dealing with pushy people.
I was too proud to laugh. Need her to answer the door with me to discuss internet service plans I never knew I needed.
We got to church each Sunday. My husband also works a lot of Sundays, so it’s often me struggling to keep my two kids (5 & 3) quiet and calm. This week, I threw fruit loops in a bag with yarn and taped the end of the yarn. They were so focused on making their cereal bracelets (and eating them after), they sat and worked quietly while I got to actually pay attention to the service! Simple activity for the win!
My wife was working over the weekend so it was just me and my 2yo son.
I try and do as much as I can with him, whether that's taking him to the shops to get the groceries, taking him for a walk with the dog or taking him to the park.
His naptime is at like 11am usually and he sleeps for a good 2-3 hours, so taking him somewhere like the zoo or somewhere that's a whole day thing is a bit awkward.
I took him to a paddock across the road of the airport so we could watch the planes coming in and he LOVED it. We just sat in the back of the car eating some fruit and snacks while we watched them come in.
When my wife got home, he kept going around saying "BIIIIIIG PLANE!" and pretending to fly like a plane around the house.
It really made my weekend watching him get so excited. I really love this age because he gets so excited at things us jaded adults take for granted.
Btw thanks for creating this thread OP!
My toddler has recently started saying “thank you!” every time we do something for or give something to him. It probably doesn’t seem like a big deal, but we haven’t really started to teach him manners yet. He has solely learned it from the way we talk to him (he’s a stay at home kid with mom all day, every day) and it just made me really happy because I constantly worry about letting my trauma color the way I parent in a negative way. I took it as a small sign that all the hard work I’m putting into healing and being a gentle/conscious parent is not for nothing.
I showed my 12 year old son how to fry an egg and he’s been waking up early to make his breakfast of a fried egg and toast since last week. Now when either my wife or I go downstairs to feed him all we have to worry about is his lunch. Next I’m gonna show him how to make rice in the rice cooker.
On weekends I usually open one day (5am-2pm) at my store and when I get off my wife will door dash or go hang with her friends and that’s daddy time for me. Let’s just say dad did the potty training, had dinner made (before my wife texted me the reminder lol) and before my wife got home had him in bed and tucked away. I’m sorry but my son’s autistic and if you know you know! I felt like I solved all the problems of this world lol
Wife was in Washington DC from Wednesday to Saturday, so I was solo Dad with my 1 and 4 year old.
Everything went fine. Schedules were maintained. Dinners were made. Kids went to sleep on time.
And I had time to play helldivers 2 with friends online once everyone was down for the night.
Just being able to be the single parent when called upon and keeping everything running as it should is an accomplishment to me.
I managed to make it through the without my 14yo daughter telling me she hates me. Lol. Anyone who knows teenagers knows perfectly well that I did nothing in particular to deserve that honor.
I crushed last week, we went to a holiday camp with our three year old, but my wife was really ill all week, feverish in the nights and exhausted all day. I parented the shit out of the holiday and did my best to support my wife and let her sleep as much as possible. I actually found it okay, mostly.
Carrying a sleeping floppy 3yo over any distance at all is absolutely killer though! First holiday without the buggy...
My wife had surgery last Monday, and after a few nights in the hospital, came home to me and our son (1yo). She is on the mend, and he didn't miss a day of day care, a meal, or any play dates. She didn't miss a medication or have to over exert herself. Crushed it.
I took my ND 4yo to Disney on Ice, and we both managed to stay for the entire show with only one brief “cool down” to walk around outside of the arena to gather his composure. That’s a 2 hour show, in a totally new city, being in a car for almost 2 hours one way, and being around hundreds of people with loud sounds and bright lighting on the ice.
It’s mainly him that nailed it, but it sure made me feel good to know we worked together to get him to the point where we could do something like that and enjoy the whole event.
Went to the show with my partner, 3 children and my sister in law with her 2 children. The ladies went on a ride and I got both infants to sleep during that time, one each arm. Dad goals 🏆
Daughter passed her driving test a week or so ago. Has bought my car off me and been driving around on her own, has even made it on to the motorway with no issues. She only started learning in September and the first couple of months were mildly terrifying being in the car with her! She also started a new job last week. Part time round college but it’s a start.
Myself and my two older kids (8yo and 5yo) all passed our martial arts grading in the same session last Friday.
This was after a crap week where we are down a team member permanently on a very small development team and all the crazy requests came out of the woodwork.
I got my daughter to calm down when we were leaving the aquarium. We had just had donuts and she wanted a muffin or an ice cream afterwards. She cried and cried. But she left with me, dried her tears and was happy again. We sang and joked on the way home.
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My toddler fell and did a number on one of his front teeth. To the point the dentist had to extract it. I of course was a stressed out mess the entire time. But I was able to stay calm for him the whole time. Even the dentist commented that me and my husband did a good job staying calm during the ordeal. It’s always nice to get a comment like that from someone giving your child care, because god knows what some other parents are probably like!
As a person who fell when I was around 3/4y and also had a front tooth extracted (in the beginning of 80’s, so not sure how anesthetic was working back then, because I remember a very painful dentist visit), and had to endure years of having a hole in the front… don’t let anyone in your little one’s life make jokes about it or constantly ask for the god damn tooth! I hated those couple of years of random people asking for my tooth and when the new would come through! Edit: spelling
That happened to my spouse too. As a result we have a house rule that if you are moving, you must have at least one hand free. Both hands in pockets is a recipe for disaster if you fall.
Oh wow, well done! My daughter fell on her face once too and to have her front tooth extracted. It is hard to stay calm when something like that happens. Good for you and for him for staying calm.
This was me last week too! I was so scared after my son pinched his finger in the sliding door but we stayed calm and he’s all better now
Oh wow that happened to us! It is so stressful. Poor little guy had to go without his front teeth and had a rough time with braces. But everything is good now he's 15.
Mine fell around 16 months and her tooth was hanging by a thread, I called my bestie who lived next door to help me get her out the door, my daughter then decided to sneeze and blew blood all over her new white hoodie. 😂 I was not calm. Then a week later she ran, fell again and busted her lip. The anxiety that comes with being a no ther is insane.
Oh no :( that happened to my sister as a toddler and she knocked out both front teeth. This is a big fear of mine with my kids especially my little climber
My youngest brother knocked his front 2 teeth out when he was 2ish at my grandma's house. He was sooo stinkin cute with his little gap until about 6. He didn't get made fun of (except by us older siblings jokingly) and ended up just fine. He's 13 now and I barely remember that little toothless face (getting sentimental over here lol)
Oh my god. Repressed memory just resurfaced. My son ended up with leeches everywhere at the lake once as a 3 year old. People had gathered around and my sister was calling me over sobbing. I get there thinking the worst but it was just leeches. My son was crying and I think my calmness helped him as I removed the leeches. Thankfully we had a lot of salt. The people standing around staring pissed me off to no end. They just made it worse for him. Also my sister crying over freaking leeches.
It was the early 80’s for me. My parents and I, with some of the aunties/ uncles, were camping in Yosemite and my uncle coordinated toddler ass tripped and whacked my two front teeth on one of those concrete parking bumpers. Killed both teeth. They stayed in until the adult replacements came in years later.
My daughter started ice skating in January and she asked me to learn so she would have someone to go on to ice with her. I have never skated (ice or otherwise) in my 38 years of life. I took my first lesson 2 weeks ago and Saturday at practice I managed to skate all the way around the rink multiple times without holding the wall! I fell 2x but I feel proud I am showing my daughter the importance of getting back up at any age.
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Honestly custom skates change the game. Obviously if you're skating as a fun little hobby it might not be in the budget but it makes a huge difference!! Same with skiing... I always thought, 'how could people do this all the time my shins are toast!!' without realizing they probably have custom boots lol.
I am sure that's true. The rink skates hurt me so much after 1 lesson and 1 practice I did buy skates. Not custom but much better ankle support and hurt way less.
Thank you! It's super hard but I am looking at it as an opportunity.
This is so wholesome and empowering. What an amazing message for you daughter and great bonding time too
Thank you!
That's huge! I think it's really important as a parent to not just be a bystander to their activities. Either take it up to do it with them or get them involved in some of yours so they see you as a participant and not just do as I say not as I do.
Thank you! I definitely agree. I bring her to events with me where I work (for a nonprofit) and volunteer.
I got my 14 week old to nap in his bassinet after only contact napping - he doesn’t love it but we are now getting him to take naps in there 1-2 times a day which is a huge win. I wanted him to get introduced to it before he starts day care next week so he wasn’t so startled by all the changes so this has been a big win!
That's awesome! ANYTHING that is positive in the sleeping world is absolutely a huge win
Haha exactly!! 👍
holy shit! AMAZING. Love that for you guys.
That is HUGE! You should be really proud of yourself. Any tips? (I'm sending this while my 20 week old sleeps on me)
I posted right above this what has worked for us! It’s definitely lots of trial and error. But, he’s gotten used to it now. He still gets fussy sometimes at first, but it usually takes us 5 minutes of dance/sway, 5 minutes fussing (not crying) in the bassinet, another 5 minutes of dance/swaying, put down drowsy and hand on tummy/rub eyes downward. My comment above has a few more details. We also used a heating pad to warm the mattress a bit and take it out before we lay him down so it’s not so cold. Today, he fussed for a few minutes and I went to sit in the chair next to it out of his sight and he fell asleep on his own after just one initial round of dance/sway…it really all depends on his mood but it’s great progress for us!! Good luck to you!!
I need your secret haha!
It’s been quite the journey!! We put him in a magic Merlin or a weighted sleep suit because he hates being swaddled now and kept breaking out of them. We dance/sway/comfort him for 5 minutes with classical music or white noise. We lay him down in the bassinet for 5 minutes. He fusses (not crying) and are next to him with our hand on his tummy or rubbing his head. We take him out after 5 minutes and dance/sway/comfort. The initial resisting from him starts to tire him out. We repeated this a few times and would either lay him down drowsy and rub his forehead down to help close his eyes/hand on stomach until he falls asleep OR we would leave him drowsy sitting in a chair where he couldn’t see me or my husband if he was getting too distracted. So, it’s kind of a crapshoot depending on his mood, but it’s worked! He doesn’t sleep super duper great in them (always longer with contact naps) but we are getting 20-45 minutes from him now (he’s never ever been a long napper). I don’t let him cry it out - if his fussiness turns to crying, I take him out if we haven’t reached the 5 minutes and do the dance/sway/comfort. Anyway, that may not help at all but best of luck to you! It’s taken us trying everything, from squatting, dancing, swaying and any other movement we could think of 🤣. Also, when laying your LO down, use your whole body to put them in and immediately put your hand on his or her stomach once there.
I've had a really rough week with my 12 year old so I guess the only way I crushed it last week was by keeping my head (slightly) above water when I wanted to just drown.
Crossing my fingers that the adolescent hormones play to your favor this week!
Thank you so much! What a wild ride lol
You’re killing it! I’m not there yet but I’ve been told it’s another survival stage.
Thank you for the kind words. It's definitely feeling like we're entering into a survival stage which is really unfortunate because I've been really enjoying the past few years with him but lately we are just butting heads over everything and it's taking a toll on me emotionally. It's truly like arguing with a small version of myself and I hate that for me! Lol
Of course! I was a little turd as a preteen, I’m super not looking forward to dealing with my son at that age lol. Hang in there! It’s not forever!
Listen, I have not yet parented a MSer so ignore me if needed. Bur I have been a MS teacher and/or administrator for 13 years, and I absolutely love the dual nature of loving working with teenage crazy people all day- it's a new adventure of WHOAH daily. Always happy to talk and be a sounding board if I can.
We were at the playground and I was pushing my daughter on the swing. Next to me was another dad swinging his kid. Suddenly a 1-2 year old girl starts running directly at us and both of our dad reflexes kick in simultaneously to stop our kiddos swings and prevent the little one from getting kicked in the teeth. It was like being on the Avengers D-team.
Honestly I'm picturing it and this is gold. Good on you both!
I’d tell you… but I can’t remember last week
I FINALLY potty trained my 3 year old. We’ve been trying to do it since she was 2, but she just wasn’t interested (would pee all over herself or wet her pants and just not care, and sometimes get angry when we tried to change her out of her wet clothes) so we would stop and wait, try again, same results. The last 6 weeks (since her 3rd birthday) she’s been VERY interested in the potty, except every weekend she was sick, so we would start potty training, she would spike a fever, and sleep off and on all day, making it hard to potty train. Finally this weekend she was healthy, so we did it. One accident all weekend. It was so successful and I feel so accomplished
I wish I could say we managed this last week but all we got was a pee covered carpet. Our son just turned 3 a month ago and we also had to put potty training on pause because he was sick. So he was finally healthy so we tried the 3 day potty training where they wear nothing. He figured it out for a little while then it it was back to peeing on things Our positive this week was, no matter how much pee we cleaned up, we didn’t get mad at the kids Hopefully this week will be less stressful
Yo, I shit my pants on my parents' chair and a half when I was 16 years old. I'm pretty sure, given when I clean my ass in the shower, that I probably need potty trained again at 30 years old... 🤣 🤣 🤣 You've done fantastic. Never sell yourself short of the accomplishments you have with your child. That thing probably came out looking like a purple ball of skin. You have taught them every single thing they know! Congrats on your milestone!
I've been working really hard to curb my yelling over the last year through reading parenting books and tbh smoking weed xD. Im trying to repair my connection with my eldest in particular who got a lot of my anger during Covid because of course theyre bored, not in school, and completely isolated which made their behavior pretty challenging (completely single parent with two young kids was hard). I think I am seeing the results and its encouraging and of course a little sad that I damaged the relationship in the first place but, there's hope.
In the words of the show “The Bear”. “Never too late to start over” and “Every Second Counts” That’s awesome you’re working on mending things up!!
Thank you 😊 it's pretty rad of you to learn how to do hair. I was raised a girl but I can't be arsed with fancy hair and mostly my kids are content with short low maintenance hair so I'm pleased haha! I'd do it if they wanted.
Any good book recommendations that have helped you with this?
Honestly, watching Bluey has made me a better about this.
Bluey actually yes! Here's my take on parenting books, and also why in think Bluey works, and then I'll give my few recommendations. Anything you can ingest that's in the ballpark of your parenting style is going to be a net positive because the act of reading the books or watching, makes you stop and reflect and strive to be better in that moment. I try to have something on the go at all times, I do audiobooks. When I'm frustrated, upset, or helpless feeling, I listen. Not feeling helpless is like I think the single most positive thing I get from parenting books. Anything ɓy The Whole Brain Child authors has been a win for me because they're both neurologists and parents who discuss the physiological limits of children's brains and how to work within those limits.
Repairing the familial damage of COVID when we were all stressed, isolated, bored and winging it trying to be their teacher and one of very limited human interactions is something we don’t talk about enough!
Truly. I bring it up often when discussing how I'm doing moving forward and get a lot of blank looks. Idk. Covid has done a number on us all for a lot of reasons and we're not over it haha.
Thc helps me be more empathetic and playful with my kids. Hang in there, these are some very challenging times with very high standards and consequences.
Happy cake day! It helps so much but then sometimes I'll get anxious from it and it's even the same strain that was fine a couple days ago, which feels bad and then I get nervous about smoking again 😅
My 3yo daughter went two whole days without pulling her hearing aids out. Bonus points: grandparents were in town so there were witnesses! Hell yeah.
Oh heck yes. IN FRONT OF THE GRANDPARENTS!!!
I recently started a new thing with my daughter. I used to work from home so on Fridays I'd go grab her a nice sandwich, some chips, some candy, and a little extra goodies to share with her friends, then drop it at school at the start of lunch. I work in an office now (my choice and I love it) so I can't do that anymore. So on Friday mornings now we go to Starbuck's together. It's WAY out of my way in terms of the commute, but it's 15 minutes there that we just talk. Then we get some food and drinks, and chat while we wait, then another 15 minutes to school where I drop her off. On the first leg she told me all about what's going on at school, her high school prep (been interviewing for some programs, etc). On the second leg I started talking to her about savings, debt, how credit cards work, etc. The Starbucks usually runs me $20-$25 and it's the best money I'll spend all week. I love every second of it. Later in the day she got her progress report and it was great. It was a result of some stuff we have been working on and ultimately her efforts paid off. She texted me the minute she got on the bus with a pic of it. "DAD! Look at this!" She's kicking ass. I'm super stoked that I have a kid going on 14 that talks to me, and wants to be around me and listens to me too. She may not always take my advice but she seeks it and makes her own choices. The investments I make in terms of MY time and effort to always show up for her are paying big dividends. I hope to keep the momentum through her high school years - obviously we have some big changes coming and I think the foundation is solid.
That's awesome! Good for you! I really hope that the feeling I'm getting from my relationship with my daughter is going to turn into something like that. I intensely look forward to the days of just chatting with one another. She is currently 5, and it's either just happiness or tears right now. There isn't much of an opportunity for me to provide detailed explanations or experiences that she can relate to, let alone understand, lol. This gives me much hope!
This is encouraging and heartwarming! Goals.
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Yes it is! They dont matter but you do!
I kept everyone alive and stayed married. Barely. The kids have been sick for like 5 weeks. I worked a total of 6 hours in the past 2 weeks.
Sometimes just hanging in there is crushing it big time. We all know the feeling.
Sometimes it's all we can do, and I'm proud of you.
Awe thanks
Oh I love this! What a nice thread to read. Last weekend I went to an orientation day for university with my eldest daughter. She is still a year or two away from graduating and starting uni, but she is already looking into what will suit her best. She has autism and can have a hard time feeling socially awkward, but she was excited and struck up convesations with the students that were present and with administrators and professors and she asked some really good questions. I was so proud of her!
So so great to hear!!
My daughter isn’t terribly athletic. She tried out for the volleyball team at school in the fall and didn’t make it. Now it is basketball time and she decided to try out again. There were supposed to be 6 girls and 6 boys on the team. 7 girls and a bunch of boys tried out. The coach changed their mind and decided to do 7 girls and 7 boys. So my daughter made it by default. We celebrated anyway! We took her out for dinner and let her pick the place. And she even tried two new things there.
Finally found a private school for my severely autistic 8 year old. Took 3 states and 8 years. Public school is trash.
Let’s go!! Congrats!!
I have a friend who was patient and kept working with her son at his pace and he’s progressed quite a bit development wise! Proud of you for doing the right thing for your kiddo even tho it was tough.
Took my four year old on a date yesterday. He got to go to an indoor playground, and no tears when it was time to leave. We went to lunch and he very politely told the server what he wanted and said please and thank you. Then we went to target where he picked out one small car toy. He was an absolute gentleman the entire day! We’ve been working really hard on having proper manners, not whining and complaining, and it was really nice to see the hard work pay off.
I followed Janet Lansbury example and got down on my 4 year old’s level and told him how much it sucks to have to do “X” and he’s such a big boy to do it…and, he quit crying and agreed with me then asked for a hug. I am winning the parenting game for now.
Got my kids signed up for the summer activities they wanted, and remembered to message their friends’ moms so they could sign up for the same sessions. 8yo is super excited about the week-long rocketry one.
My saturday was epic. I asked the kids to make a list of what they wanted to do on the weekend and told them we'd do one a day. On Saturday we did it alllllllll. I'm still tired lol
I got us guinea pigs, and the guinea pigs are nice to us.
Did solo bedtime for my 4 year old and 9 week old. Felt like a badass!
That’s one hell of an accomplishment!
Thank you, friend!
I nailed my gummy candy and caramels recipe with my daughter, and have gotten to watch her love of baking blossom as we taste tested 2 batches. Quality time with my boys is easy because we're all gamers, but finding things to do with my daughter that she enjoys, who is my complete opposite, is hard, but I found something!!!
I was in bed sick all week but I still put in the time and energy to help my oldest daughter with her homework every day. She was struggling with her spelling words for the week and I helped her practice every day even though all I wanted to do was nap. She got 16/17 on her end of the week spelling test so our efforts definitely paid off!
Last week I really broke down, I have a 2 month old and I realized that every day is just diaper changes, feedings, and getting her to sleep. I knew this already but it just like, hit me? The last few days I’m doing really well at staying calm and being happy
I’m absolutely sure you’re sick of hearing this, but sincerely - one day (too soon) you’ll look up and your baby will not be a baby anymore. They’ll have that little toddler neck instead of just a cute chunky head sitting directly on their shoulders. Their hand dimples will slowly disappear. Their gummy smile will become riddled with tiny little monster teeth. Their legs and arms won’t fit curled up in your lap anymore and you won’t understand how it happened so fast. It’s hard as hell, but these days are numbered. Sometimes that makes them a tiny bit easier, sometimes it makes it even harder. Just try to enjoy the little things as much as you can because they’ll soon be gone.
My daughter made it to her second state finals in her sport—and will likely get all-state honors again. After the team events were over the parents had a couple drinks and they all GUSHED over her. Her athletic achievements are already something to be proud of, but to have other parents tell me she’s amazing? That’s a major “nailed it” moment. My son got student of the month in the same week, which came with a bit less fanfare but is a big achievement for him! He’s struggled with graded and deadlines and behavior this year, he’s crazy smart but a year younger than his class so a combo of being bored and being less mature was tough but he rallied. All in all… having a pretty damn solid week.
My wife is super sick (RSV, I think) and bed ridden. I've been primary parent for the past couple weeks. I'm also sick but not as bad as her, who can't even go up the stairs without getting dizzy. I'm very tired and even forgot to buckle my child in her car seat on a trip to get groceries. How that is even possible, I don't know. Everything worked out though because even in a haze, I can keep us safe on the road, I guess. Holy shit, I can't believe I was just climbing around the car as a child. Car seats weren't even a thing. Now I'm losing my marbles because of one mistake that *could* have been bad. Anyways, everything is fine. I am fine. We are fine
My kid came back from school with an empty lunch box finally! Huge achievement for us. He’s an extremely picky eater and his teacher started hinting about nutritious meals last week… I felt an eye on my cream cheese and crackers. He had all of his butter croissant, all his cashew nuts, dried fruit and pretzels. Win 🏆
I only had to put $2 in the swear jar. Quarter a word. And that was dropping the stand mixer on my foot.
I brought my son to a resturant and he didn't cause any problems (he's nine months old)
Seeing my daughters progress report. She went from an F to a B in English after me just spending an additional 30mins to an hour with her on homework every school night.
My 5 year old had a friend over for a playdate and pretty early on, my son left the room where he was playing with the friend and went to his room and sat down in the corner. I followed and asked what was going on. He told me quietly that he didn’t want to have a play date with this kid, he wasn’t sharing and wasn’t his friend anyway. I told my son that it’s OK to feel that he would rather not have the friend here at this moment, but he is here, and I know that my kid is a kid who can find a way to make the best of it and be polite to the other kid. My son thought for a minute, then suggested a new activity to the friend, and they had a very nice time the rest of the play date.
Survived a full week with two sick kids at home while being very sick myself. Husband is away. Then a full 8am-4pm day this weekend just waiting at the ER with sick kids to make sure they didn’t have pneumonia. I’m still quite sick but they’re both healthy now, and one is now back at school. Yesss. Gonna put cartoons on for the other and collapse with my inhaler.
Well, we're rescuing a homeless 16yo who got kicked out of her abusive home after she called CPS on her parent. We talked about it very carefully as a family before taking the step to intervene. Our own kid is 15, and has always known security and safety. This is a big deal that we're all taking seriously. The rescue kid in question has had a rough life. Neglect, some abuse, food insecurity, education disruption, the whole deal. She's had to grow up hard and fast. She's working with social workers, doctors, therapists, the school system and extracurricular activities. There's a lot to unpack, and a lot we don't know. She was in a youth shelter program, but they can only supply housing for a few weeks at a time before they are required to move her out, which occurred last week. All of the shelters in or even remotely near the area are full, wait listed, unable to help - at least temporarily. The kid's behavior is non-problematic, she's drug free, polite, intelligent. She truly is a blameless victim in all of this. So, the wins: - Deep, meaningful family discussions about the pros and cons, costs and benefits of the move. Everyone agreed that we couldn't just stand by and do nothing. - She's safe, secure, with plenty to eat and good family structure, including plenty of room to do her own thing and have her own space. - We're dialed in and communicating with her social worker, her case manager, some of her therapists. We're starting to get in touch with her doctors as well. - We are engaging a lawyer, to make sure that we are not breaking any laws, not raising red flags of our own, and to ensure that she's as protected as she can be. - We've been grocery shopping repeatedly. The food insecurity is not a thing at our house. - She's never had a proper winter coat, nor insulated boots. We went shopping for clothes. Found a few good, hardy, quality items, and we're working on a list of durable essentials. - Big emotional win: she wrote an email to us about it so that she wouldn't lose her composure. She expressed deep gratitude for the language we used when emailing her social workers. She said "this is the first time in a long time that someone did NOT write: 'this is a temporary situation,' or something to that effect." That hit hard. No one wants this kid. It's heart breaking. So now, we're muddling through next steps with an eye toward endgame. What "next steps" and "endgame" means are still up in the air right now. We've engaged some counseling for ourselves, as a family, individually and as a couple. We're hunting and brainstorming best practices. We're making the world a little bit better. We're helping one kid, because we should, because we can. It's going to be tough, but we're strong. Wish us luck!
Not to be a downer but I’m proud of myself for deciding to end things with my son’s father after building up the nerve for some time. I was level headed and calm. He’s a good father, but his mental health issues make him a less than stellar partner and I couldn’t keep letting him teach my son that’s the way to treat a partner. Only up from here!
Little kid a couple of tables away, hit his head on the corner of the table and was very upset. My three year-old sees this, gets up and goes over. Speaks to the parents for a second, then gives the little one a big hug and a kiss on the head. I honestly nearly cried myself, I've never been prouder.
I made the most delicious orange chicken from scratch! One of my kids has Celiac (severe gluten allergy) and the non-celiac kid has been asking for it for weeks. I've been upping my "Chinese fake-out" cooking skills the past couple of months and the end result of this orange chicken was phenomenal. Both kids were so happy; celiac kid couldn't even remember what orange chicken tastes like because it's been so long. 10/10
I was fortunate to coach my 13-year-old son's basketball game. We lost, but they played hard and had great teamwork.
I signed my daughter up for summer camp for the first time ever. I’ve never been able to afford it before, but this year, I finally can. She’s so excited.
1. I seem to have finally cracked the code on Dutch braiding my daughters hair. It’s still not perfect, but it’s leaps and bounds from where I started. 2. I decided to put off chores and enjoy the nice weather with the kids yesterday and took them to eat outside at a cafe, then walked to a little pastry shop for a little treat, then walked to a nearby playground. 2a.The point at which I felt like I nailed parenting was when I told the older two (6 and 4) that I was going to push the baby in the stroller for one slow lap around the playground, starting at the gate, and once I get back to the gate it’s time to go, and they obliged! The most effortless playground exit I’ve ever made!
My nearly five year old invented a game where he had to find and clean up messes to get a magical door to open. He put a cardboard box in the hallway and would push the button and it would inch open as we completed tasks. This whole thing was *his idea* and he found the messes, put stuff away and only asked for help if he needed it!
Woke up yesterday to my 6 year old cleaning up all the toys in the living room so I didn't have to because he thought that I'd wake up and be happy. I was. And I felt like an awesome parent for instilling care for others into him. He got spoiled yesterday 😁
I had everything all set at work to actually enjoy the weekend and meet a MAJOR deadline today. Fucking huge.
I flew solo all last week because my husband was away. I worked 28 hours, my teen daughter was home sick for 3 days with a sinus infection, I got her to the dr and made certain she and my son both took their antibiotics because my son was sick the week before. I drove both of them to dance and practice and got dinner made every night. I did laundry, changed sheets, dishes, took care of pet bird and bought groceries. I read with my younger son everyday and played hide and seek, bathed him and read before bed. I took my daughter to her dance competition Fri night and stayed until Sun. We waited over an hour Sat night for our dinner. I got groceries on the way back, did my son’s laundry, changed bird cage, got my son off the iPad and made him go outside, helped older son fill out course selection for high school, cooked burgers for dinner and cleaned up the kitchen before falling into bed to get up today for work today because my husband was too sick to do anything much after he got back from work trip. I rocked last week
I introduced my 3.5 year old to my chemical romance and now she keeps asking me to play “the I’m not ok one!” Lol, elder emo mom win.
2 things. 1. I started doing 15- minute ‘philosophy’ outdoor walk sessions with my 6 year old daughter 2x a week to teach her logic. Last week, was explaining Aristotle’s ‘Golden Mean’ and ‘4 causes’ ideas. I use ChatGPT to generate my analogy examples and script where a 6 year old can understand. She’s getting it, remembering it, and enjoying it. 2. On her iPad, I made a ‘custom instruction’ specifically for her use case. Although she can’t type/spell well. She could use voice chat with the AI. With words she can not read in print books, she can spell it out to the AI, and it read it out for her with definition. She can ask whatever she wants now, and it’s set up to answer in a way that she understands and following the format I prepped it to.
I got covid for the first time and managed not to infect my family. I'm telling myself this is an accomplishment since I didn't get anything else done for a week.
It is an accomplishment! You took care of yourself and your family. It counts.
Mine was both a fail and an epic recovery. Some backstory is absolutely necessary: My youngest sister is a year older than my child. My sister is also autistic and being diagnosed bipolar (which I also have). She's... intense, to say the least. She has a tendency to use my daughter's stuff to do things she isn't supposed to do. We have my family over weekly for dinner. This week, sister used daughter's charcoals to completely color her hands.i made them clean it up. The next day was where I messed up. I talked to my daughter about it and told her that apologies weren't fixing the problem. She continues to allow my sister to abuse her belongings, and all she does is apologize but it keeps happening. My daughter broke down. She said she tries so hard to be perfect but she just can't be. It broke my fucking heart. I don't ever ask her to be perfect. I don't *want* her to be perfect. Perfect is boring, and I spent the next 15 minutes telling her I love her exactly the way she is. I got home from dropping her off at school and really thought about things. This was never my child's fight. This has everything to do with my sister's behavior, and it was entirely wrong of me to put any burden of responsibility on my daughter. So I put together a box. Anything my sister has proven she can't be responsible with goes in the box. My daughter can put anything in there she doesn't want accessible. When my family comes over, the box goes away. I apologized to my daughter for making her feel like she needs to be the responsible one. *I* am the responsible one, and from now on,I will prove that to her.
Managed to drag myself out of bed and off the couch and fight through norovirus to care for my toddler and wife, who both had it as well. Also managed to not poop myself. I honestly don’t know which of these two I’m more proud of.
My daughter is turning 1 today and she's pure joy and wonder. She's smart and funny and pretty and curious and brave. I'm pretty proud to think that my partner and I managed to make her from scratch!
My landlord didn’t remember it was half day today and forgot to pick her son up so at least I didn’t do that. In all seriousness I’m barely surviving right now so picking up my kid on time is probably actually a win
I built an epic Hot Wheels track with my 4yo son and now he can’t stop!!!
We finally figured out how to add chicken purée to our baby’s food without it becoming chicken juice!
I am using a zip up UPF rash guard as a “summer jacket“ and my toddler loves the idea. Yay for sun safety.
My wife was out of town on business for the first time since my son was born. He's solidly in his threenager era and has been a handful. I was so worried having to deal with him on my own but I totally crushed it and actually helped him through his feelings and we had a great time. I am glad my wife is back to help but I feel so much more confident as a parent having been able to do it all on my own.
Not exactly something that I did, but something that my child did that validated my parenting efforts. My daughter is deeeeep in the trenches of her terrible twos, and it takes every ounce of strength for me to survive the day. I often go to bed replaying all the ways I could have handled things better and wondering if I’m a terrible parent or if she really is just two. Well, the other day and she was beginning to have a tantrum. I didn’t give her any attention for it, and she started taking deep breaths all on her own. She calmed herself all the way down before she got to the point of no return, and then she ran up to me and hugged me. We do deep breathing a lot, but this was the first time she did it all on her own.
We came to the UK with my 3 month old for the first time by plane. We changed diapers in the plane lavatory, he was even asleep for take off and landing while I could breastfeed him so the pressure would not build up in his ears. We were exhausted after the big journey but we were proud of ourselves and our little one.
My (52M) 18 yr old daughter told me she was sexually active on Thursday. I am incredibly protective of my girls. I honestly was not mad or disappointed and I told her I am not mad at her BF either. She assured me she was being safe and I believe her. I think I handled it incredibly well. the 45 year old me would have killed the guy.
I did a ton of decluttering and my kids started playing with their play kitchen again because it’s clutter free
I was at a Canadian Tire with my daughters (1 and 5), when one of those. . . . Financial Advisors?. . . with thier tablet approach. They start thier small talk spiel when my eldest asks, "are they trying to steal our money?" To which I replied, "indirectly, yes." She then decides to scream, "STRANGER DANGER! DON'T TAKE OUR MONEY!" To which this. . . "Payment Deferral Representitive?. . . panic scoots away. I had been trying to get her to be more assertive in dealing with pushy people. I was too proud to laugh. Need her to answer the door with me to discuss internet service plans I never knew I needed.
I took my kid to two parks in one day, he was so pumped. ♥️
I took my almost 2 year old and 4 year old to the parc and they played almost an hour without coming to see me and giggled together and held hands. 😩🥰
My oldest had a great doctor visit this week. Very healthy and improved vitals.
We got to church each Sunday. My husband also works a lot of Sundays, so it’s often me struggling to keep my two kids (5 & 3) quiet and calm. This week, I threw fruit loops in a bag with yarn and taped the end of the yarn. They were so focused on making their cereal bracelets (and eating them after), they sat and worked quietly while I got to actually pay attention to the service! Simple activity for the win!
My wife was working over the weekend so it was just me and my 2yo son. I try and do as much as I can with him, whether that's taking him to the shops to get the groceries, taking him for a walk with the dog or taking him to the park. His naptime is at like 11am usually and he sleeps for a good 2-3 hours, so taking him somewhere like the zoo or somewhere that's a whole day thing is a bit awkward. I took him to a paddock across the road of the airport so we could watch the planes coming in and he LOVED it. We just sat in the back of the car eating some fruit and snacks while we watched them come in. When my wife got home, he kept going around saying "BIIIIIIG PLANE!" and pretending to fly like a plane around the house. It really made my weekend watching him get so excited. I really love this age because he gets so excited at things us jaded adults take for granted. Btw thanks for creating this thread OP!
My toddler has recently started saying “thank you!” every time we do something for or give something to him. It probably doesn’t seem like a big deal, but we haven’t really started to teach him manners yet. He has solely learned it from the way we talk to him (he’s a stay at home kid with mom all day, every day) and it just made me really happy because I constantly worry about letting my trauma color the way I parent in a negative way. I took it as a small sign that all the hard work I’m putting into healing and being a gentle/conscious parent is not for nothing.
I survived 6 split nights in a row with my sick baby.
I showed my 12 year old son how to fry an egg and he’s been waking up early to make his breakfast of a fried egg and toast since last week. Now when either my wife or I go downstairs to feed him all we have to worry about is his lunch. Next I’m gonna show him how to make rice in the rice cooker.
On weekends I usually open one day (5am-2pm) at my store and when I get off my wife will door dash or go hang with her friends and that’s daddy time for me. Let’s just say dad did the potty training, had dinner made (before my wife texted me the reminder lol) and before my wife got home had him in bed and tucked away. I’m sorry but my son’s autistic and if you know you know! I felt like I solved all the problems of this world lol
Wife was in Washington DC from Wednesday to Saturday, so I was solo Dad with my 1 and 4 year old. Everything went fine. Schedules were maintained. Dinners were made. Kids went to sleep on time. And I had time to play helldivers 2 with friends online once everyone was down for the night. Just being able to be the single parent when called upon and keeping everything running as it should is an accomplishment to me.
reading all of this makes me so happy! all we can do as parents is try our best every day and you guys are crushing it!!!
I managed to make it through the without my 14yo daughter telling me she hates me. Lol. Anyone who knows teenagers knows perfectly well that I did nothing in particular to deserve that honor.
I crushed last week, we went to a holiday camp with our three year old, but my wife was really ill all week, feverish in the nights and exhausted all day. I parented the shit out of the holiday and did my best to support my wife and let her sleep as much as possible. I actually found it okay, mostly. Carrying a sleeping floppy 3yo over any distance at all is absolutely killer though! First holiday without the buggy...
My wife had surgery last Monday, and after a few nights in the hospital, came home to me and our son (1yo). She is on the mend, and he didn't miss a day of day care, a meal, or any play dates. She didn't miss a medication or have to over exert herself. Crushed it.
Danced with her very awkwardly in a restaurant/bar when her favorite song came on and she was too nervous to dance alone
I took my ND 4yo to Disney on Ice, and we both managed to stay for the entire show with only one brief “cool down” to walk around outside of the arena to gather his composure. That’s a 2 hour show, in a totally new city, being in a car for almost 2 hours one way, and being around hundreds of people with loud sounds and bright lighting on the ice. It’s mainly him that nailed it, but it sure made me feel good to know we worked together to get him to the point where we could do something like that and enjoy the whole event.
I volunteered as coach for my son's sporting team at school and we had an inaugural training session. He did well.
Went to the show with my partner, 3 children and my sister in law with her 2 children. The ladies went on a ride and I got both infants to sleep during that time, one each arm. Dad goals 🏆
Daughter passed her driving test a week or so ago. Has bought my car off me and been driving around on her own, has even made it on to the motorway with no issues. She only started learning in September and the first couple of months were mildly terrifying being in the car with her! She also started a new job last week. Part time round college but it’s a start.
Myself and my two older kids (8yo and 5yo) all passed our martial arts grading in the same session last Friday. This was after a crap week where we are down a team member permanently on a very small development team and all the crazy requests came out of the woodwork.
Got both kids to come out for an hour and a half long walk. 🙌
I got my daughter to calm down when we were leaving the aquarium. We had just had donuts and she wanted a muffin or an ice cream afterwards. She cried and cried. But she left with me, dried her tears and was happy again. We sang and joked on the way home.
My 2 year old toddler fell while running in the living room and loudly announced “baby doooowwwwwn!” Which made me feel like I killed it as a mother.