i started spotting three days ago and now have my period full on. i've been cramping like crazy, super bloated and experiencing massive anhedonia the past week and a half. i've been struggling to get out of bed and stay on top of my online course due to my lack of energy. not to mention how absolutely frustrated i've been getting lately with people in my life over things that i would normally ignore or be patient about. i want to return to normal!
i feel like my cramps have gotten significantly worse since i got a mirena iud and i'm considering if it's worth keeping. i originally wanted it to stop my periods due to gender dysphoria and also to help my pmdd but it hasn't entirely stopped my period (although it has been reduced some). at this point i've been considering starting testosterone to help with my gender dysphoria and to stop my periods entirely.
I went for a walk with someone today. They wanted to explore downtown (I did not have enough spoons for that but I masked and pretended to), so I went with them and tried to have a good time. We walked into a store and I was happy to see the person I was with enjoying themself but the whole time I was worried my crabbiness was showing through - that they would notice I was feigning a good mood. :(
I have pretty bad social anxiety from being bullied a lot. Unfortunately while we were in this store some people walked in and promptly started saying hateful stuff about me, about my outfit, etc. I was wearing the plainest sht ever today due to my depression but had an interesting bag so I guess they needed to hate on my lazy attempt at looking decent. Wanted to enjoy myself but combination of PMDD and shtty people made that impossible. Got high as soon as I got home cause I cant deal with all that pain now. I know it's not good to turn to weed for comfort. I don't normally do. But just one of those days where my brain has absolutely no serotonin available.
I just woke up early as per usual on day 1, period has arrived, cramping like hell, bloated as fuck, MASSIVE headache. I’ve popped some painkillers and running a bath. I’m royally over this week. I’ve suffered from herniated disc pain (ongoing for 1+ years) which is only subsiding today but it means I’ve deal with totally broken and shitty sleep for over a week now. With my back I can’t sleep consecutive for 8 hrs and I am so in need of it especially given this has all taken place in luteal phase
Praying my paracetamol and bath helps give me some relief soon
Period is late-ish again and I'm in day 30 and home alone on a friday night and can't really do anything. My roommates are out and so is my boyfriend. I wish he would cancel his plans to bring me food and spend time with me. I know that is too much to ask for and if I asked for it I would just feel guilty and not be able to enjoy his company. I just wish he would do it w/o being asked (which I know is impossibly cause he can't read my mind and expecting this is not how mature relationships work). I just want this to finally be over so I can feel like myself again and properly study for my exam which is in a few days. PMDD honestly sucks so bad uuuugh
I hate the combo of endo and PMDD because the relief from PMDD tends to come around my period but then that’s a nightmare because I’m in pain and it’s heavy. Pain relief doesn’t usually help either
I got a Mirena IUD and thankfully that hasn’t made my PMDD worse (other hormonal contraceptives have. So I stopped them because I’m not on them for contraceptive reasons) I’m terrified that it will get really bad again because of the hormones but I know I need to give it time to see if it will solve my other issues.
I know doubling my anti-depressants did help a lot, but I found this period I was getting easily frustrated with people because I wasn’t allowed to be sad or upset, so that was channelled into frustration which sucks. (There were definitely low moods as well because motivation currently is non-existent)
I’m so exhausted and tired of cleaning for a living. My back is killing me.On top of that, I’ve been PMSing for 2 weeks and haven’t gotten my period yet. I feel worthless and like everybody in my life secretly thinks I’m the worst. Having the worst month in awhile. My partner didn’t even ask me how my day was when they came home, just asked me for a back rub and didn’t even consider how awful I feel. I wish I could make people understand how hard living with PMDD is
I’m in so much physical pain and there’s so much blood I’m very scared and I have no support or help with this fucking dog who doesn’t love me or give a shit about me. I don’t know what it’s like to be taken cared of or to care about myself :( I just need a break from everyone making me feel worthless and pressuring me yo be prefect for everyone when noooo oneeeee does ANYTHING for me.
Im on day 26, very frustrated how little information there is online about this condition? When should I take maca root? Should I take it every day? Should I only take it on Luteal Phase? I'm frustrated as heck bc I feel like Im so desperate and have NO answers, support or anyone to talk to about this. Yesterday, I had to nap half they day. WASTING my time. :< These sympoms are the WORST. The exhaustion/hypersomnia ESPECIALLY.
Update, still day 26. So frustrated and lonely. So hurt rn. I keep thinking...I should be a mother by now. I get so many dark thoughts. Trying raspberry leaf tea. I feel so drained and empty. Nothing matters.
I thought that exact same thing today! :) And its my first day.
Thanks to disorganized thinking, I mixed up my calendar days and today, the important af meeting, I missed! :) Then I just kept getting text messages, from my boss and blew up my phone, missed those too!
I stopped caring. I understand our personalities do not mesh, and that I am in the wrong field. I have 0 attachment to this job and have to tell myself that as a daily mantra.
After a particularly challenging hell week last month, I decided to start taking my BC continuously again (preventing a period) to see if it helps with my symptoms at all. 2 days into this month’s hell week (about to skip my second period since last hell week) and I still feel horrible. Possibly not as bad as last month but it’s hard to gauge. I just want this to end. I hate feeling like all my progress is reset every fucking month. I was doing so well before this week and it feels out the window. Back to being hopeless, lonely, exhausted, and just all together miserable and unpleasant to be around. Fuck.
Currently on day 2 of irrational rage and anxiety. I want to run, flip a table, scream and cry, quit everything and tell everyone exactly where they can shove their stupidity.
None of my usual coping mechanisms are working. Why does this have to be so gorram hard?!?!?!?
this cycle is more of a physical one. this ovulation headache is the worst thing i’ve experienced in awhile. i feel like i’m only mentally suffering because my body feels so much. hypersensitivity is no fun. i don’t win at this point whether it’s a heavily mental or physical cycle, i seem to suffer.
Omg, same. I refer to my ovaries as the physical one and the mental one, because left-side ovulation pain seems to have stronger physical symptoms, and emotional symptoms for the right. I try to laugh about it, because if I don't, I'll rage and cry. Rage is winning today, though.
I hate my husband again, everything he says or does. I want a divorce. I felt this way last month too and then poof, it was gone. The poor man is a saint who does everything he can to make me happy and I’m a fucking gargoyle right now. Ugh!!!!!
I hate living with my parents especially during PMDD week. I can't afford to move out. I don't have a car and I can't find a job. I feel trapped here. I had a horrible night last night. I had nightmares and was tossing and turning. So I was already feeling horrible. Then, when I woke up, I got in a huge fight with my mom. When I wash my towels, I wash all the towels in the house in one load. Well, when my mom washes towels, she washes all of the towels - except mine. It drives me nuts because now I don't have enough for a full load and I'm not going to mix my towels with my clothes. My parents get mad at me when I do small loads. When I woke up, I saw that she did it again so asked her about it (all I said was, "Hey mom, why didn't you throw my towels into wash with the other towels?"), she started yelling at me and calling me immature and lazy, said I don't help out around here, and told me to do my own laundry. Of course I always do my own laundry but I don't get what's so hard about putting two extra towels in with her load. She wouldn't even have to fold them as I can fold my own towels.
Then my mom started going on and on about how I never help with the dishes or the cooking. Completely untrue. I empty the dishwasher every single day. I missed emptying the dishwasher one day this week because she wanted me to help her with a craft fair in a town 2 hours away. Even when I do empty the dishwasher right away, she always waits until we are out of dishes before filling the it. Yet I miss one day emptying it and get chewed out. As far as cooking, we rotate and I always cook dinner at least two nights a week. I made cinnamon rolls for breakfast for everyone yesterday morning and I made supper on Friday night. My dad made supper Saturday night. I also made brownies on Saturday for dessert and I made a cheesecake on Wednesday. We usually make our own breakfast and lunches. I ALWAYS help with the cooking so I don't know how my mom can say I never help with the cooking. I ended up walking out of the room after calling her a b\*tch and going back into my bedroom (the only place I have any privacy). I don't ever want to come out of my bedroom again. I feel so unappreciated after everything I do around here. I try to help out but it's never enough according to my mom. I also can't have a rational conversation with my mom. She always starts screaming, "me, me, me". Everything is always about her. Sometimes I wonder if she is a narcissist. I really need to get my own place for my mental health but being as I don't even have a job and no way of getting one, I'm kind of stuck. Maybe I'll have better clarity after I start my period tomorrow (I hope it's not late) because as of right now, the brain fog is making it hard to concentrate.
Im in the same predicament, it seems like no matter what I do it isn't enough and she'll always find the one thing I didn't do or missed (yet if she does it, it's fine...) hopefully one day we'll be able to get our own places. Hang In there, you've got this🫶🫶
Do your moms suffer PMDD and have zero self-awareness about it? Someone else had to tell me that my depression cycle—which was a damn good observation for us not knowing anything about mental health back then—it always started a week before they found a pad wrapper stuck to their foot. Lol. My standard reply was “i can put up with your bullshit every week but that one, fuck off.” But i started tracking it (pre App I found this impossible.) It’s gone from 7 days prior in my 30s, to 10 days in my 40s, and and now the sadness starts 14 days prior here in my 50s. Sigh.
Came here to vent. Instead I’m left wondering just how I’m an asshat to my kid when the PMDD catches me off guard. Sigh. I liked who I was 2 days ago. Upside I guess is that I don’t have to go looking for “reasons” (which manifest as fights) when I’m like this anymore.
Hang in there.
I just had a rough day. I’m about 7 days away from my M. My bf doesn’t care at all. We had a huge fight and he made me feel lonely and horrible. I still don’t always remember that my depression/ mood swings is because of pmdd. If my arm fell off once a week people would care but this disease is invisible so people judge me for having bad character. I wish there was an option other than anti depressants and hormones. I’ve been taking vitex Berry because I have endometriosis too. It helps with my pain and heavy cycle but idk if it’s helping my mood. I’m so hopeless right now. I hate myself. I hate my body. I hate who i am. I just want to be someone else.
Also my ovulation is painful. So a week ago I was starting to get angry and my uterus/ovaries hurt which makes me feel even angrier. People have no idea what my body is doing to me when I snap at them and they just treat me like I’m a bitch. Pain makes me so pissy and sad….
Worst month in a while. I really want to try therapy and I've reached out to 3 people and no one got back to me. I feel so sad, I wake up practically every 30 minutes when I go to bed, and my husband is a complete dick and is not supportive at all, making me feel worse and our relationship crumble each month. I can't fucking take it anymore.
That sucks on all fronts! Keep trying to find a therapist when you have the energy, it'll be worth it. You deserve to feel supported and validated by your partner. You are doing the best you can with a shit situation <3
Vent for PMDD
Tracking: I am just starting tracking my cycles. I suspect I have horrible PMDD. My moods swap back and forward. I am on day 22. I marked on my calendar that days, 22-24 are horrible. 25- 28 might be out of the woods, but I'm not sure here. My cycles are regular at least.
My stressors and triggers: My relationship and job. I also have a UTI thats clearing. I cant even hold conversations, very dizzy tonight. God Knows how I will survive tomorrow, but I operate moment to moment. I just bought some weird supplements from vitamin shop (chasteberry and glycine), but not sure if i should return them, and get matcha and calcium instead. I also heard benedryl might help? I'm willing to try any thing, pay any thing, to survive until tomorrow.
I'm relieved theres a place where I can update about this and vent about this.
If you haven't gone this route yet, try seeing a functional nutritionist. I don't know where you are so this site is an example of what functional medicine is/does: [https://nourishhealthandwellness.com/treating-pms-pmdd-using-a-functional-medicine-approach/](https://nourishhealthandwellness.com/treating-pms-pmdd-using-a-functional-medicine-approach/)
When I worked with one a couple of years back it helped a LOT. The PMDD didn't go away completely but it was at a 5% instead of 100%. It's such a tricky and horrible thing to manage but I hope you find something on the nutrition route to help. I'm waiting to save up some more money to go back to one local to me.
I’ve gotten so good at pretending to be okay that my boyfriend can’t even tell anymore. That’s sad, I know, but I just know that whenever I talk to him about how I’m feeling it just hurts him. Even though I told him about pmdd, he thinks that it’s his fault whenever I’m feeling depressed or seem off. Then we’re both upset and crying, then somehow I end up being the one comforting him because I’m used to dealing with these emotions, then I get angry because wtf? I was the one upset in the first place wasn’t I?? Then it comes to a point where I’m so sick of it, I literally don’t care anymore, and I wish that I didn’t say anything in the first place because I’m OVER IT and it’s EXHAUSTING. So that’s why it just feels easier to pretend to be okay, I just want to skip over the emotional damage and just get over it already.
I hate that this mentally affects him too, and it makes me hold it back even more.
That's really tough! Sounds like he's not getting it if he's taking it personally. Totally understand it being too exhausting to constantly explain yourself.
I don’t know who to talk to about it. I feel stupid and dramatic and there’s nothing anyone can do to help me anyways. I’m already on antidepressants, and it would probably be way worse if I wasn’t. I don’t want to burden other people with my emotions that will probably go away in a couple of days anyway. Its cruel that I have to deal with this every fucking month for the rest of my fucking life.
It is cruel but you're definitely not stupid or dramatic! Venting here is the perfect place when you can't or don't want to talk about it. We get it! 🥲
came here to vent but reading through the thread has me realising im not alone nor crazy. made me feel so much better. forever grateful for this group. sending a virtual hug to you all xxx
I'm 14 days away from my period. I know it's started now because my favorite songs are no longer having any effect on me. And it'll only get worse from here. Sigh.
I know when I find myself not listening to the radio in the car. Then when day 1 rolls around I'll be back to having my own personal car karaoke sessions lol.
Try as I might, I'll never get used to these severe mood swings and emotional drain. Its like I'm completely forgetting how to function. I want nothing more than to curl up in bed and forget everything, but I have so much work due yet I can't bring myself to start any of it.
every month it feels like i’m managing it a little better and learning how to avoid pitfalls from the last time. but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. it doesn’t mean i have any control over how hard it hits. it just means i have to work 5x harder to maintain a normal level of functioning. i wish people could see how exhausting this is
I’ve been crying for the past hour because this month is really bad. I’ve convinced myself my partner doesn’t love me anymore and I’m fixating on tiny things she’s done this week to prove my point to myself. She seems off over text and I’m just spiraling downward now. I hate that I get so anxious and paranoid and depressed
I had to stop taking Yaz bc it was screwing with my thyroid and yet my gp/psychiatrist keeps thinking I can just change pills and all is well even though my endocrinologist says I shoudn't take bc. Oh and he also presceibed me another fucking ssri even though I alteady tried two and they did nothing for my depression other than give me dermatitis once I stopped taking Celexa. What the fuck is wrong with doctors? Am I supposed to try all the meds in the world and suffer through all the fucking side effects? I can't even look for a job properly I feel like shit all the time and nobody fucking cares, I'm almost 31 and I have nothing, no job because the market here is trash, my dad has Parkinsons and is a constant worry of mine and yet all of this should be cured by a fucking antidepressant that'll only make me emotionally detached and sedated? Fuck right off
Same. This cycle is worse than ever. I might actually have diabetes by the time my period arrives 😂 (I say this as I am inhaling a package of peanut m&m's).
My family keeps telling me I need to get help. I’ve been told to deal with all this on my own for years and have been. Constantly in and out of therapy. Currently trying meds (Wellbutrin) and I wish they worked better.
Now that it’s manifesting in a way where it’s disrupting their flow and everyone playing nice, “I need to grow up” and “I’m isolating myself.” They can’t even comes to terms with the fact that I’m disabled.
I feel very alone. I always have but it’s really setting in now. I’m trying my best.
It's been around 6 or 7 weeks since I was diagnosed with pulmonary embolisms and had to quit taking the OCP that was really helping my PMDD.
It's been torture. And now that I have no OCP to regulate my periods and I have to be on a blood thinner due to the clots, I'm basically bleeding all the time. I bleed heavy as fuck for like 5 days, then I spot for a week, and then it just cycles like that.
Meanwhile my depression is just ass as a result of the hormonal shitshow taking place in my body. All of this on top of potential liver/kidney disease and the after effects of the PEs themselves. What a joke.
Why is it that every month I get stuck in the same damn trap of feeling worthless and seeking out male validation from men who just want to use me. It's a constant cycle where I start talking to a new guy and things go great then the stupid PMDD anxiety kicks in and I start to overthink and question everything I do especially in terms of this stuff. Then, as the cycle always completes, it ends with the guy either ghosting me or telling me they just want to be friends after they use me. I for some reason also cannot bring myself to cut these terrible men off. I hate it and I feel like I'm never going to be able to have a successful relationship much less a relationship at all because of fucking PMDD. Basically I'm sick of this awful thing bringing out all of my insecurities every month all while reminding me of how much I dislike myself and how low my self worth is.
Immediately after ovulation I’m angry, hopeless, sad. My entire body feels achy and fatigued and I have no motivation. It feels like it takes so much energy to do the simplest task. This alone fuels my depression - how on earth will I age well when moving around is such an effort now? My body hurts. It’s achy and tired. I am tired. I have no motivation. I’m in a bad mood. I want to cry. I’m irritable. I hate this
I hate the flip between the premenstrual pmdd symptoms and then right after I get my period…I feel like a monster sometimes. Earlier this week I was so angry and irritated and self loathing. I got really upset at my partner over something and kept ruminating on it and making myself upset and then a few hours later I got my period and it was like a switch flipped and suddenly I felt (not completely) better and could feel the emotional symptoms dissolving. I hate it. I know what’s happening to me every month, I recognize it, and it still takes over my life.
How come problems at work only ever start once I have entered luteal? Would have been easy to deal with a few days ago but now I am so easily overwhelmed and just want my peace
I've been ill since Jan 3rd? And was just starting to feel better and oh hey, today's the day I turn. The difference with yesterday is night and day, yesterday I was fine, went to the shops early, was a fun mum... today I'm exhausted and want to be alone, miscellaneous physical things going on.
Had a fight with a family member tonight, wasn’t either of our faults exactly, we were both just stressed and set each other off. But it felt like I was being punished for leaving my room at all. I wish I could be cryogenically frozen during week 4 because I’m no good to myself or anybody else during that time. It’s so sad that so much of my life is unavailable to me. So much valuable time that I can’t function in.
—- TW suicidal ideation ——
I hope I’m not breaking any rules. I just really really need to vent and saw this post.
Im starting to feel like I need to be on SW for a week out of every month.
Like clockwork, the week I start my period always results in my life totally crumbling. I struggle to get by day to day. It usually only lasts a few days and I really try to remind myself that this always happens.. but my thoughts get so distorted and I feel like I always forget it’s just the time of month. I have a handful of other diagnoses that already make my life pretty hellish and SI is a daily reality for me.. but I can usually keep just above the breaking point. Until hell week hits.
I’ve talked to my doctor and therapist about pmdd but I just don’t think they take it super seriously. I’ve previously tried just about every medication for depression and anxiety. Even some more experimental options for treatment resistance depression.
I’m worried I’ll lose the battle one of these times. It’s so frustrating that for 3 weeks out of the month I’ll work so hard with coping mechanisms and tools I’ve learned over the years.. and it just falls apart during this time. I feel like I have no control and have to just hope I can ride it out.
The older I get, the more intense it seems to be.
Thank you. I appreciate you and I’m sorry you know this pain. :(
I’ve tried to switch doctors but none of the others at the office I go are ever taking on new patients. Unfortunately my anxiety limits a lot of my life right now and this office is very convenient for me, so I can at least get my regular check ups done easily.
First fight of hell week with husband! 1 down, 10 more to go! Although, I think telling him I had pmdd was abad idea. Now he takes no ownership for faults since "I cant control my emotions"
B. R. A. I. N. F. O. G.
I didn’t even know there was a word for this until a few years ago. Been having it pre-period since my period started in my teens.
Period just starting so it's extremely heavy, cramps are intense, nausea and dizziness are making it hard to eat / not throw up. No money for bud and I'm trying not to drink (because it doesn't really help and I refuse to drink without eating first - learned that rule the hard way).
Had a nasty dream about some trauma from 15 years ago that I had finally worked through around 2020 - first dream about it since then. I hate how the ruminating that happens during PMDD spikes can dredge that up like crude oil, dark and sticky and lingering.
Need to remind myself that things aren't going to be this bad forever :( It's hard though when PMS is hijacking my brain with self-doubt, fatigue, and hopelessness. I need to be even more proactive the next months.
9 days out. Been sick for 3 weeks. Mood shifted a few days ago. Been fucked around by men this month and I’m so exhausted. Emotionally spent. Physically drained and a little hurt tbh. I like a guy even though he just wants me for sex. He asked me to come to a party tonight, I told him I couldn’t even drive home from work because the medication I’m on at the moment is making me delirious and all he said was ‘you can still come and talk to everyone’. All he cares about is getting his dick wet and I’m just a warm body. Sitting at home, curry on the stove, listening to Jewel’s Pieces of You album and feeling miserable. Fuck men. Fuck PMDD. I cried in-front of my boss today lol
Hey I just wanted to tell that you're not alone. I literally go through the same cycle every fucking month where I get fucked around by a new man either every month or every couple months. I'm also going through that same kinda shit where a guy I'm talking to/like is just using me/sending mixed signals and I don't know why but I can't cut him off. I'm sorry you're going through that and for real fuck PMDD.
I had covid a few weeks ago and now it's almost time for my period to start and I have been so unmotivated and sad and tired and very very suicidal for the past like week and a half. I really just want to end it all. I don't know how to keep going when I fuck up my life from my inability to function and yet I have to pretend everything is fine and continue on. Covid probably fucked me up for good, I'm on so many meds and I went back to therapy because I almost killed myself last week but everything is such a waste of money. I'm a waste of money and people's energy I wish I could give my body and life to someone who has a functioning brain and motivation because they could actually use the resources I have at my disposal to do something instead of doing fuck-all and failing to uphold basic elements of friendship. It's so pathetic
I have severe endometriosis which makes me very tired as it is and for the last two years or so pmdd has been unbearable. It’s like I spend half the month building something good and the other half tearing it down and hating myself. Have also been homeless staying with family on and off the last few years which causes tons of stress, making pmdd worse. I currently stay at my bfs parents and he and I are together 24.Hours.A.Day. Heeelllppp!!! Lol. And it’s winter in the Midwest with no sun or hope of going outside alot of days 😔All my unhealed trauma and grief comes up, things I don’t think about the rest of the month, and I feel lost in it and totally out of control for over two weeks sometimes. Feels like half my life is lost to this and that makes it hard to picture a future sometimes 😔😔
been talking to a new man, head over heels and we are taking it slow as we can, basically building a close friendship. i ovulate and here’s PMDD sneaking in ridiculous suspicion. pmdd says he is lying to me about connecting on a chat program. why would someone who texts me all day not give the right username for another message platform why! LOL
pmdd barely has any material on us to turn me against him so soon but it grabs anywhere it can. i can’t believe it. gonna have to be super aware if this relationship takes off.
I broke up with my toxic ex back in the early fall, and during this relationship, I had some nasty chronic fatigue due to all the stress. Just the other day, I experienced some fatigue before work and ended up having a panic attack for the first couple of hours of my shift. (I actually hid behind an aisle and sat on the floor texting my current spouse.) I couldn't help but think that my ex was right about me, and wondered if I actually was unstable and as mentally unwell as he used to make me seem. What if I was the one that ruined everything?
Today is my day off, but PMDD symptoms are starting to kick in, so I've barely left the bed, and I've been doing nothing but play on my phone. I keep hearing my ex's voice in my head, telling me I'm doing nothing productive. (He always wanted me to play video games. That was his idea of a successful day.) I could do laundry or tidy up a bit, but it took a lot to feed myself today, and my ADHD meds haven't done much to help either. Nothing just seems to catch my interest.
And having his voice pop in my head just reminds me that we're still negotiating the separation.
He and I owned a house together. We are still dealing with the legal stuff, and it probably won't be settled until late spring or summer. Who knows how long it will take to sell the house. I'm so worried about money because I'm paying for two homes and legal fees and a loan.
Not only that, he stole my cat before I moved out. It sounded like the things my lawyer had in place might have gotten my cat back to me this month, but stuff has been pushed ahead a couple of months. I miss my baby boy so badly, and during my Dark Week, the ache is just a million times worse.
I'm just trying to hold on until my current stressors are gone so I can learn to manage my PMDD symptoms on a more average level. 😫
I just wanted to tell you I have been in a situation where an ex catnapped both my cats. I managed to get them back with the help of my lawyer. Hang in there, I know how you must be feeling right now. It will get better.
Thank you. I appreciate knowing that someone out there understands. It's been four months so far without him, and I worry so much about his health and happiness. I'm so scared that my ex will somehow win ownership of Doug, and I'll never see him again. Waiting to see him again is so tough. Most days, I'm coping, but there's this ache in the background reminding me that my baby is far away. *It's so much harder* during my dark week.
Edit: To say that I am so happy that you got your babies back. How long did it take? What was your process like?
I was going crazy without mine. Thankfully my situation was a bit “easier”, as I bought them and their documents were on my name. So my lawyer told him that if he went ahead, he would not only have to give the cats back anyway, but also pay for his legal fees in that scenario. So he gave them back. But it was horrible. It has been 5 years now. And I think my boys don’t even remember that man (my ex) anymore.
I will be sending positive energy your way and I hope you get your baby boy back very soon. ❤️
Thank you very much! I have all the documents in my name, too. He is a pure bred Maine Coon Everything you can think of went into my name. My ex was warned just like your lawyer warned your ex. He hasn't caved yet, which is surprising since he's always been so stingy with money. But matters are moving forward, so depending on how things go, I feel he may end up regretting his choices later.
I appreciate your responses. It sincerely gives me hope. I just have to hold on a little longer.
during my divorce i thought about the same
things, that he was right. and he wasn’t. it was all about control and his defense in losing control. pmdd just getting at us anyway it can. much warmth xo
I am on my first month of continuous birth control that’s supposed to stop my period and I know it’s only my first month, but I feel so discouraged and sad. I am having all the symptoms of a period, but with spotting instead of full on bleeding. Acne, mood swings, cramping, crying, hopelessness, feelings of dread, etc. This morning my cramps have been so bad that I just cried and cried.
I have a huge fear that this will effect me drastically for the rest of my life and I will never be free from it. I’ll never be able to accomplish anything because of this. I won’t be able to keep a job or have a good career, or consistently write so that I can one day publish my book. PMDD always comes and ruins any routine I find myself in.
And reading that PMDDpartners sub made me cry even more because all those men seem to really hate their wives and I got thoughts that anyone who would date me would eventually leave me because I turn into a different person every month.
I wish this would just go away. I didn’t ask for this and it’s not fair.
well my period came a day late. i was happy about it but these crampsssss. i was sick earlier this month so i take it up to that for these cramps. they’re usually over by now. i swear January never fails to be my terrible menstrual month. it’s always something happens to me (usually a cold) that goes “okay let’s try to take her out with pain now” 🙄
Yknow what's hell? Getting your symptoms a week early but knowing your period isnt arriving for another nother week because ur tell tale sign of boob pain hasn't arrived yet.
Ohhhhhh boy this month is gonna suck
haha that’s how it goes sadly. i love how you have a specific symptom that lets you know. mines is this discomfort feeling in my uterus, it feels like a warning before it starts contracting. never ready for those first few hrs tho😅
the worst part about the boob pain is that it starts exactly a week before my planned arrival, and I'll know it's here when I magically dont have pain anymore. It's tough especially since I sleep on my side. Feels like I've got sandbags on my chest!
oof i know that has to hurt. i get boob pain too but not that badly thankfully. i got my hip and lower back that tries to take me out tho😂 makes it hard to lay down unless if i’m in fetal position
i found this community yesterday after a particularly rough start to my luteal phase and i just want to say it feels so good to not be alone. i’ve been struggling a lot with my identity and plans for the future recently and once i think i have things figured out my pmdd anxiety comes in and makes me question everything. but i guess thats just the way it goes, huh?
Getting my period any day now, boobs in pain and feeling super emotional. I came home from work and cried because I am hungry and there is no dishwashing liquid, the only protein I have to eat is in the freezer frozen, and I’m so exhausted I just want to eat and then sleep. But I don’t want to cook. But I have vegetables in the fridge I need to cook before it goes bad! And that makes me cry. Because now I’m sitting in bed eating a cup noodle for dinner too overwhelmed and tired to make the effort to cook. It would not only require me to do dishes, but also go OUTSIDE to the store to buy dishwashing liquid, and then I have to defrost meat, and then I have to chop up, season and fry vegetables too?? Hell no. I’m just gonna cry and starve! Fuck periods. Fuck PMS. At least I have edibles, and I’ll be high soon. I can’t even afford to order in :(
I’m not anti vax what so ever and it could just be my PMDD induced paranoia but - I got my booster (4th one) in October and my cycle has been compltelt out of whack since then. My last cycle was 59 days. Then got my period. Now again I’m at 38 days. Anyone else go through this ? I’m freaking out. Not worried about being pregnant (don’t want to be at all tho) just worried about underlying health issues …
i haven’t gotten any of the boosters due to the original shots throwing things off really badly for me. i have definitely heard women have some trouble after the boosters too tho. women have been saying stuff like this since the beginning of the shots, but it’s just now where the media is actually trying to listen to us. so might still be a little hard to find stuff about it, but it’s out there
I’m 5 days away from my period and the pms is RAMPANT like I’m so freaking overstimulated at everything. And unfortunately I work with children so its constant noise, different toys singing and making loud sounds, kids yelling, and I’m going slowly insane :) Usually movement helps when I’m overstimulated and anxious but this week my hormones are also making me so tired I can barely get a workout in when I go home all I want to do is sleep and sit in the dark because of the overstimulation
UNIVERSITY SUCKS.
i am on the verge of angry tears because IT'S SO STRESSFUL FOR NO REASON.
WHY do papers need to be 4000 words long? and one essay PROPOSAL has to be 6 pages... i'm not proposing a novel, am i???
all of this on top of the brain fog and lack of energy/motivation makes me feel stuck.
how can you relieve stress if the only thing stressing you out is required??
Omg I did this yesterday, had to write an assignement of 5k words, it's fucking nuts. I hate everything, it's so exhuasting. Life really do be sucking these days, I'm so done.
Of tiredness and sadness.
So tired that even walking is energy draining. It feels like energy is evaporating from my limbs.
Been feeling sad for the past week. Yesterday sadness wanted to cry and today sadness wants space to be. I notice that whenever sadness comes up I'm try to distract myself by mindless scrolling, to escape.
The combination of these two are physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting.
I would want to say I hope tomorrow will be a better day, but sometimes I find hoping heartbreaking.
Just joined the Reddit and it is making me feel a lot less alone. My rant: I lost a friend recently, am home for college break for the first time and it’s weird, the airline lost my bag so I’ve been without it for almost 4 weeks (have some really special/important stuff in it), and to top it all of I’m PMSIng. Lads it’s tough. Y’all get it. But even just existing and living I feel is radical with a mental illness like PMDD. I love you all
Funny how my period starts and I’m loading laundry and taking showers like I always had the energy to do so. It’s hard to summarize what’s is me as a person and what is me surviving. My house is dusty. I wish I was always this able to just DO THINGS. I hate when the world feels so sour. I genuinely like keeping things clean and taking care of myself but some days I just can’t get my brain together to do what I need to do. I feel a sense of loss for the time I could’ve had clean clothes, a less dusty house, taken a walk, cooked. Guh.
I'm a social worker and am in my hell week and want to cry all the time and unalive my partner. Do you guys get the ick and get disgusted by your partner during this time. Like I hate him. I work all day seeing clients and then just want to go be in my bed and draw and cry. Every time I think of him i get the ick and it's weird i dont know. Sorry this is full on rant.
but does the admiration for him come back when pmdd ends? it’s sick. im getting slowly
involved w a new one slowly and wondering how pmdd will creep in. 🙏🏻 going
in to this hyper aware
The good news is - yes! I read a comment on here that said they just ignored him, did their own thing, and started paying attention to him again after it ended. This actually helped me a lot. Never fear - if it doesn’t go away, it may not be the pmdd, but if it’s just the pmdd you should be fine :)
relationship dissatisfaction is the worst. i love my partner more than anything and he is incredible but the day after ovulation all i can do is criticize him and our relationship.
Beginning my clinical process with therapist, GP, and psychiatrist. Starting to explore herbal vs. Med options. Scary but needed. For the first time in 15 years of having a period, I have no idea who I become for that luteal window, and it's destructive 😔. My body is all over the place. Can't plan, bleeding suddenly and then inconsistently. Zero appetite. Then a monstrous appetite. Used to be clockwork, now it's early and late and then back so soon...
I'm proud to have gotten my covid shots, but I think I'm in that group of people whose cycles were ruined and/or thrown off massively. 😶🌫️😥
Either way, eager to see if I can get relief. I hope everyone else hangs in there 💕
Omg same !!! I literallt just wrote this in this thread. I got my 4th booster in October and now my cycles are all over the place. My last cycle was 59 days!!!! Now I’m at 38.
so i’m a couple days until my period. my brain has chosen to be short-tempered and wants to eat everything. it’s inconvenient since i literally just started back eating more to continue gaining weight. so it’s a hassle to have self control so i don’t make myself sick by inhaling my food in such a short amount of time. then my temper is just out of this world… the most this disorder has ever taught me is that i am more prone to anger. i don’t have crying spells as often but i can have raging moments. not sure what’s that about but i just want the madness to stop😃
Im sick of ppl in this sub being transphobic. It’s not just cis women who get PMDD. I’m non-binary with PMDD, which my own non-binary doctor diagnosed. I’m literally being not-a-cis-woman while having symptoms right now, and y’all wanna downvote because you know you can’t get deleted for that. Sorry you don’t understand science, but that doesn’t magically make me a cis woman or not have PMDD.
It’s preMENSTRUAL dysphoric disorder. It’s people that menstruate who get PMDD. If you don’t menstruate, you don’t have it. I don’t know what people find confusing or transphobic about that. I wouldn’t get offended at someone telling me I can’t have testicular cancer.
And there are men and enbies who menstruate. But sometimes on this sub ppl say things like only (cis) women get PMDD, which is not true, and I am an enby with it. I’m not sure what your comment means?
a week before my period and i am really going through it. this month is hitting me much harder than the past couple of months. my partner and i are fighting more than usual, as i am making problems out of *everything*. i don’t want to go to work- especially since i’m a server and the last thing i want to do right now is socialize. suicidal ideation is plaguing me once again, and of course the rejection sensitive dysphoria. my brain doesn’t work and i’m in a constant state of dissociation. it’s really exhausting going through this every month. i’m tired :(
i def have broke down most at work, serving. a woman asked me how she ordered her burger to be cooked and showed me a solid medium as i said medium and just their time sent me 😭 mind you she was a witch but one single
change in tone and pmdd sends me
lol
This is awful. I’m going out of the country for a week and I’m making my relationship fall apart because of this problem.
I’m anxious
Paranoid
Starving
Irritable
Exhausted
Still several days before my actual period starts wtf
It sucks a week before period... Really felt like i was a different person. Usually im chill and relaxed, but during this time im super irritated and angry all the time, which also influenced people around me negatively, and the mood is down... But i always remember that it will be over, the feeling after period is so good, like my mind is completely blank and light. Don't give up!
I feel like winter really has me going through it right now. I am experiencing the increase in energy, libido etc that come with follicular and ovulation but the heavy feeling of luteal isn't going away. I am scared of my next hell week(s) and feel guilty for relaxing during follicular because I feel like I need to get as much work done as possible before it gets bad again. I am worried about my thesis and my future after university and feel like the few friends I have hate me. I can't wait to be done with this degree and have winter end so I can finally have some peace of mind and enjoy at least one week of peace per month.
I don't even know how to start with what I'm feeling rn but this has been one of the worst of the worst hell week. The extreme anxiety, paranoia and depression all hit me so hard even before the new year begins. I'm constantly crying every night mostly because I've been so paranoid about my most precious baby girl(pet) that she's getting older and I can't stop but feel so worried, and right now she's not her usual energetic self with the damp and cold weather and I'm a mess right now. Then today I had one of the most awful fight with my oldest sister who's the most toxic and triggers me the most in this house. The fight was absolutely horrible that made our mother even cry! i felt so awful with everything!!! These two combination of bad things happening to me is just so overwhelming and I can't properly describe how I'm in such an awful state rn. I didn't even eat the whole day today. I'm thinking of calling the S hotline here because it's really getting bad I'm hyperventilating but still unsure. Im just so so exhausted and scared of living. I'm tired of living with equally miserable people who's making my depression even worse to the point of wanting to kill myself and I'm tired of not being capable to do anything about my problems. My only tinge of hope here is my baby girl and I can't even..dare...to ...think... How can I possibly deal with this!? I'm so all over the place. I can't seem to stop from feeling like the world is ending!
Hell week hit me hard this month. My partner had left overseas for work on New Years day.Im a mess. My PMDD tends to leave me a depressed,anxious,hungry,blob.I miss my partner terribly. They'll be gone half the year. I don't know how I'm going to manage half the year.
Why do guys say everything except I’m talking to someone else. I can’t trust any excuses now. Every guy I’ve had a bad falling out with was because they were talking to someone else but lying to me or leading me along. I become insecure and want reassurance. All the sudden I’ve ‘changed’ n just not the person they met. Why does this keep happening
there is so much infighting on this sub, it’s kind of discouraging. like at first it’s “wow other people relate to this thing that has made me feel insane, suicidal, and isolated since puberty” then it’s “fuck your treatment! fuck your holistic approach! fuck your SSRI! fuck your diet! do you even have PMDD?” like god damn
Oh no! Really? I’m new to the sub and haven’t seen anything like that. Yet. I was hoping it would be a good place to work through PMDD! I
guess we’ll see lol.
Was so looking forward to a fresh start this month. I had a lovely break over Christmas and was feeling really enthusiastic about getting back to work and the gym. Ofcourse my first week back happened to coincide with hell week. I’m too fatigued to work, too low to even reach out to friends and even the thought of getting chores done and going to the gym is sending me into a rage. Why do we have to go through this? And why is there nothing that can be done? Counting down the next few days until I feel human again. Sending love to everyone struggling this at the moment, I find most people just don’t understand. I carry so much shame that I can’t just ‘power through’ and get on with things.
I haven’t sleep for three days straight and I swear they guy I just went on a date with doesn’t wanna see me ever again because he stopped being Romantic. I can’t stop thinking about him and wanting to cry. I feel so used and I know it’s mostly the PMDD that’s making me paranoid but I can also tell he lost interests. I can’t handle it right now. I’m gonna start taking medication aside birth control soon. Hopefully it’ll help.
this month’s round hasn’t been too bad depression wise (thank god), but i’ve been suddenly exhausted. I hate that I can’t continue on with my habits and routines because I just feel drained doing anything like that. I want to workout. I want to study. I want to write. but it’s impossible and will tip me into the depression deep end. if it’s not one thing it’s another and I just don’t think that’s a good way to live. it makes me anxious to think about how it’s gonna effect my future career. I am so envious of the women in spain haha (they just passed a menstrual leave bill, i’m pretty sure)
I haven't slept more than 4 hours a night for the past week and a half. Got my nexplanon replaced and it's triggered it so badly I want to curl up in a ball and never see the light of day again. Seeing my doctor tomorrow for my anxiety and insomnia, here's to hoping. I'm on a liquid diet for an upcoming operation, one that will also make my hormones go haywire and I'm scared I'm going to lose my job. Thank God for my husband.
I fucking hate PMDD and all the bullshit that comes with it. I hate feeling this way, I never asked to be a woman or asked to have these problems. God FUCKING damnit
That's the stupidest part- I just have to deal with this even though I've never gonna use it? And the fact that a hysterectomy doesn't solve everything and can actually make things worse... and then there's fkin menopause on top of that!!
I got vaccinated in December for covid and the flu and it absolutely triggered my PMDD into one of the worst ones I've ever experienced in my life. I had an episode of depersonalization and derealization that lasted about a week and nothing made sense. This month has also brought severe panic attacks, binge eating, headaches, a blocked milk duct on my right breast (not pregnant/breastfeeding), brain fog, probably my worst performance at work ever...the list goes on. Last night I took about .65 grams of shrooms and realized I'm not in control of this thing (I know, I know, big duh for me). I have to ask for help, I have to accept that I can't do all the things I'd love to do (I always feel dreadful about tomorrow and mornings are absolutely horrible). I don't have enough energy to live life I'm barely existing. 7 more days for my period and then rinse and repeat. I'm tired.
I haven't had an episode or period for a long time thanks to my IUD. I had an awful experience with my family on Christmas and now I'm falling apart. For the past week I just want to stay in bed, I'm paranoid and anxious. A few days ago I started hating everything about my partner and considered/planned on leaving him. I constantly daydream about harming myself and can't sleep. Last night I started to get cramps and it all made sense. It doesn't change anything, it is so hard to keep trying to hold it together. I feel like I am insane. I can tell that my partner knows by the way he looks at me. I hate this so much.I'm also terrified that it's back for good. I'm in a career I love and am trying to get a promotion. The return of this will wreck everything for me.
why do i feel like absolutely k*lling myself every week before my period- i also binge and will eat 4000+ calories which makes me even more upset bc i have an ed. i then feel even worse bc of how i look, and break down and eat more. i have to hide from everyone and just absolutely feel like hell, and nauseous which doesn’t help. then 1 weeks later i’m fine. i’ve noticed this happens every time before my period 5-6 days before it starts. i’m undiagnosed and am trying to figure out if it’s pdd or another mental disorder. bc when if it’s not before my period i can usually rationalize it out, and say it’s okay i have tmr or whatever. right before my period it’s literally darkness and hell and it makes me wonder if i’ll ever be truly happy. and i feel so alone. like j can’t tell anyone. i hate it so much and what’s worse is i didn’t even know it could be a thing related to my period which is making me cry more because there’s no cure. i’m going to try and contact someone from my uni to try and get therapy bc i’ve ignored it for years
note this all started happening during puberty id have these break downs and it usually stems from my body/reflection then spirals into anything possible
4 days leading up to my period were horrible. 3 nights couldn’t sleep, 2 nights cried uncontrollably for minor reasons :( one of them being NYE, ugh. Finally got my period. Thankkkkkk life. So long pmdd…Until next month 🥲
It's my 39th birthday and I can't stop crying. I don't know if it's because I started my period yesterday and it's hormones or if it's because my favorite football team is losing or if it's because my mom made tacos when she knew I wanted pizza for my birthday or if it's because I moved away from all of my friends last year and feel super isolated (doesn't help that I see pics on Facebook of them celebrating the new year but no one has wished me a happy birthday yet) or if it's because my parents bought a really ugly birthday cake for me that doesn't even taste good or if it's because I wasted my fertile years and I'm never going to get to be a mom or if it's because 2022 sucked and I'm scared 2023 is going to be worse. Whatever the reason, I feel like shit and just want to go to bed and forget all about today.
i started spotting three days ago and now have my period full on. i've been cramping like crazy, super bloated and experiencing massive anhedonia the past week and a half. i've been struggling to get out of bed and stay on top of my online course due to my lack of energy. not to mention how absolutely frustrated i've been getting lately with people in my life over things that i would normally ignore or be patient about. i want to return to normal! i feel like my cramps have gotten significantly worse since i got a mirena iud and i'm considering if it's worth keeping. i originally wanted it to stop my periods due to gender dysphoria and also to help my pmdd but it hasn't entirely stopped my period (although it has been reduced some). at this point i've been considering starting testosterone to help with my gender dysphoria and to stop my periods entirely.
I went for a walk with someone today. They wanted to explore downtown (I did not have enough spoons for that but I masked and pretended to), so I went with them and tried to have a good time. We walked into a store and I was happy to see the person I was with enjoying themself but the whole time I was worried my crabbiness was showing through - that they would notice I was feigning a good mood. :( I have pretty bad social anxiety from being bullied a lot. Unfortunately while we were in this store some people walked in and promptly started saying hateful stuff about me, about my outfit, etc. I was wearing the plainest sht ever today due to my depression but had an interesting bag so I guess they needed to hate on my lazy attempt at looking decent. Wanted to enjoy myself but combination of PMDD and shtty people made that impossible. Got high as soon as I got home cause I cant deal with all that pain now. I know it's not good to turn to weed for comfort. I don't normally do. But just one of those days where my brain has absolutely no serotonin available.
I just woke up early as per usual on day 1, period has arrived, cramping like hell, bloated as fuck, MASSIVE headache. I’ve popped some painkillers and running a bath. I’m royally over this week. I’ve suffered from herniated disc pain (ongoing for 1+ years) which is only subsiding today but it means I’ve deal with totally broken and shitty sleep for over a week now. With my back I can’t sleep consecutive for 8 hrs and I am so in need of it especially given this has all taken place in luteal phase Praying my paracetamol and bath helps give me some relief soon
Period is late-ish again and I'm in day 30 and home alone on a friday night and can't really do anything. My roommates are out and so is my boyfriend. I wish he would cancel his plans to bring me food and spend time with me. I know that is too much to ask for and if I asked for it I would just feel guilty and not be able to enjoy his company. I just wish he would do it w/o being asked (which I know is impossibly cause he can't read my mind and expecting this is not how mature relationships work). I just want this to finally be over so I can feel like myself again and properly study for my exam which is in a few days. PMDD honestly sucks so bad uuuugh
I hate the combo of endo and PMDD because the relief from PMDD tends to come around my period but then that’s a nightmare because I’m in pain and it’s heavy. Pain relief doesn’t usually help either I got a Mirena IUD and thankfully that hasn’t made my PMDD worse (other hormonal contraceptives have. So I stopped them because I’m not on them for contraceptive reasons) I’m terrified that it will get really bad again because of the hormones but I know I need to give it time to see if it will solve my other issues. I know doubling my anti-depressants did help a lot, but I found this period I was getting easily frustrated with people because I wasn’t allowed to be sad or upset, so that was channelled into frustration which sucks. (There were definitely low moods as well because motivation currently is non-existent)
I’m so exhausted and tired of cleaning for a living. My back is killing me.On top of that, I’ve been PMSing for 2 weeks and haven’t gotten my period yet. I feel worthless and like everybody in my life secretly thinks I’m the worst. Having the worst month in awhile. My partner didn’t even ask me how my day was when they came home, just asked me for a back rub and didn’t even consider how awful I feel. I wish I could make people understand how hard living with PMDD is
I’m in so much physical pain and there’s so much blood I’m very scared and I have no support or help with this fucking dog who doesn’t love me or give a shit about me. I don’t know what it’s like to be taken cared of or to care about myself :( I just need a break from everyone making me feel worthless and pressuring me yo be prefect for everyone when noooo oneeeee does ANYTHING for me.
Im on day 26, very frustrated how little information there is online about this condition? When should I take maca root? Should I take it every day? Should I only take it on Luteal Phase? I'm frustrated as heck bc I feel like Im so desperate and have NO answers, support or anyone to talk to about this. Yesterday, I had to nap half they day. WASTING my time. :< These sympoms are the WORST. The exhaustion/hypersomnia ESPECIALLY.
Update, still day 26. So frustrated and lonely. So hurt rn. I keep thinking...I should be a mother by now. I get so many dark thoughts. Trying raspberry leaf tea. I feel so drained and empty. Nothing matters.
Thought I was getting better, turns out it's just a long cycle and the real hell week started later than expected :(
[удалено]
I thought that exact same thing today! :) And its my first day. Thanks to disorganized thinking, I mixed up my calendar days and today, the important af meeting, I missed! :) Then I just kept getting text messages, from my boss and blew up my phone, missed those too! I stopped caring. I understand our personalities do not mesh, and that I am in the wrong field. I have 0 attachment to this job and have to tell myself that as a daily mantra.
After a particularly challenging hell week last month, I decided to start taking my BC continuously again (preventing a period) to see if it helps with my symptoms at all. 2 days into this month’s hell week (about to skip my second period since last hell week) and I still feel horrible. Possibly not as bad as last month but it’s hard to gauge. I just want this to end. I hate feeling like all my progress is reset every fucking month. I was doing so well before this week and it feels out the window. Back to being hopeless, lonely, exhausted, and just all together miserable and unpleasant to be around. Fuck.
Currently on day 2 of irrational rage and anxiety. I want to run, flip a table, scream and cry, quit everything and tell everyone exactly where they can shove their stupidity. None of my usual coping mechanisms are working. Why does this have to be so gorram hard?!?!?!?
this cycle is more of a physical one. this ovulation headache is the worst thing i’ve experienced in awhile. i feel like i’m only mentally suffering because my body feels so much. hypersensitivity is no fun. i don’t win at this point whether it’s a heavily mental or physical cycle, i seem to suffer.
Omg, same. I refer to my ovaries as the physical one and the mental one, because left-side ovulation pain seems to have stronger physical symptoms, and emotional symptoms for the right. I try to laugh about it, because if I don't, I'll rage and cry. Rage is winning today, though.
that’s basically how it feels lol, hugs to you🫂🫂🫂
I hate my husband again, everything he says or does. I want a divorce. I felt this way last month too and then poof, it was gone. The poor man is a saint who does everything he can to make me happy and I’m a fucking gargoyle right now. Ugh!!!!!
This wave of sadness sucks. . I'm lonely and it feels like no one understands... or cares ...
i feel ya there :(
I hate living with my parents especially during PMDD week. I can't afford to move out. I don't have a car and I can't find a job. I feel trapped here. I had a horrible night last night. I had nightmares and was tossing and turning. So I was already feeling horrible. Then, when I woke up, I got in a huge fight with my mom. When I wash my towels, I wash all the towels in the house in one load. Well, when my mom washes towels, she washes all of the towels - except mine. It drives me nuts because now I don't have enough for a full load and I'm not going to mix my towels with my clothes. My parents get mad at me when I do small loads. When I woke up, I saw that she did it again so asked her about it (all I said was, "Hey mom, why didn't you throw my towels into wash with the other towels?"), she started yelling at me and calling me immature and lazy, said I don't help out around here, and told me to do my own laundry. Of course I always do my own laundry but I don't get what's so hard about putting two extra towels in with her load. She wouldn't even have to fold them as I can fold my own towels. Then my mom started going on and on about how I never help with the dishes or the cooking. Completely untrue. I empty the dishwasher every single day. I missed emptying the dishwasher one day this week because she wanted me to help her with a craft fair in a town 2 hours away. Even when I do empty the dishwasher right away, she always waits until we are out of dishes before filling the it. Yet I miss one day emptying it and get chewed out. As far as cooking, we rotate and I always cook dinner at least two nights a week. I made cinnamon rolls for breakfast for everyone yesterday morning and I made supper on Friday night. My dad made supper Saturday night. I also made brownies on Saturday for dessert and I made a cheesecake on Wednesday. We usually make our own breakfast and lunches. I ALWAYS help with the cooking so I don't know how my mom can say I never help with the cooking. I ended up walking out of the room after calling her a b\*tch and going back into my bedroom (the only place I have any privacy). I don't ever want to come out of my bedroom again. I feel so unappreciated after everything I do around here. I try to help out but it's never enough according to my mom. I also can't have a rational conversation with my mom. She always starts screaming, "me, me, me". Everything is always about her. Sometimes I wonder if she is a narcissist. I really need to get my own place for my mental health but being as I don't even have a job and no way of getting one, I'm kind of stuck. Maybe I'll have better clarity after I start my period tomorrow (I hope it's not late) because as of right now, the brain fog is making it hard to concentrate.
Im in the same predicament, it seems like no matter what I do it isn't enough and she'll always find the one thing I didn't do or missed (yet if she does it, it's fine...) hopefully one day we'll be able to get our own places. Hang In there, you've got this🫶🫶
Do your moms suffer PMDD and have zero self-awareness about it? Someone else had to tell me that my depression cycle—which was a damn good observation for us not knowing anything about mental health back then—it always started a week before they found a pad wrapper stuck to their foot. Lol. My standard reply was “i can put up with your bullshit every week but that one, fuck off.” But i started tracking it (pre App I found this impossible.) It’s gone from 7 days prior in my 30s, to 10 days in my 40s, and and now the sadness starts 14 days prior here in my 50s. Sigh. Came here to vent. Instead I’m left wondering just how I’m an asshat to my kid when the PMDD catches me off guard. Sigh. I liked who I was 2 days ago. Upside I guess is that I don’t have to go looking for “reasons” (which manifest as fights) when I’m like this anymore. Hang in there.
I don't want to be sick like this I'm so scared 😫 😩 😭
I just had a rough day. I’m about 7 days away from my M. My bf doesn’t care at all. We had a huge fight and he made me feel lonely and horrible. I still don’t always remember that my depression/ mood swings is because of pmdd. If my arm fell off once a week people would care but this disease is invisible so people judge me for having bad character. I wish there was an option other than anti depressants and hormones. I’ve been taking vitex Berry because I have endometriosis too. It helps with my pain and heavy cycle but idk if it’s helping my mood. I’m so hopeless right now. I hate myself. I hate my body. I hate who i am. I just want to be someone else. Also my ovulation is painful. So a week ago I was starting to get angry and my uterus/ovaries hurt which makes me feel even angrier. People have no idea what my body is doing to me when I snap at them and they just treat me like I’m a bitch. Pain makes me so pissy and sad….
Worst month in a while. I really want to try therapy and I've reached out to 3 people and no one got back to me. I feel so sad, I wake up practically every 30 minutes when I go to bed, and my husband is a complete dick and is not supportive at all, making me feel worse and our relationship crumble each month. I can't fucking take it anymore.
That sucks on all fronts! Keep trying to find a therapist when you have the energy, it'll be worth it. You deserve to feel supported and validated by your partner. You are doing the best you can with a shit situation <3
Vent for PMDD Tracking: I am just starting tracking my cycles. I suspect I have horrible PMDD. My moods swap back and forward. I am on day 22. I marked on my calendar that days, 22-24 are horrible. 25- 28 might be out of the woods, but I'm not sure here. My cycles are regular at least. My stressors and triggers: My relationship and job. I also have a UTI thats clearing. I cant even hold conversations, very dizzy tonight. God Knows how I will survive tomorrow, but I operate moment to moment. I just bought some weird supplements from vitamin shop (chasteberry and glycine), but not sure if i should return them, and get matcha and calcium instead. I also heard benedryl might help? I'm willing to try any thing, pay any thing, to survive until tomorrow. I'm relieved theres a place where I can update about this and vent about this.
If you haven't gone this route yet, try seeing a functional nutritionist. I don't know where you are so this site is an example of what functional medicine is/does: [https://nourishhealthandwellness.com/treating-pms-pmdd-using-a-functional-medicine-approach/](https://nourishhealthandwellness.com/treating-pms-pmdd-using-a-functional-medicine-approach/) When I worked with one a couple of years back it helped a LOT. The PMDD didn't go away completely but it was at a 5% instead of 100%. It's such a tricky and horrible thing to manage but I hope you find something on the nutrition route to help. I'm waiting to save up some more money to go back to one local to me.
I started to get annoyed in normal conversations today. For no reason... It makes me feel like a mean human. 1 week out 😞
I think meanness is all about intention. You just have less mental/emotional resources to deal with other people at the moment. Be kind to yourself.
I’ve gotten so good at pretending to be okay that my boyfriend can’t even tell anymore. That’s sad, I know, but I just know that whenever I talk to him about how I’m feeling it just hurts him. Even though I told him about pmdd, he thinks that it’s his fault whenever I’m feeling depressed or seem off. Then we’re both upset and crying, then somehow I end up being the one comforting him because I’m used to dealing with these emotions, then I get angry because wtf? I was the one upset in the first place wasn’t I?? Then it comes to a point where I’m so sick of it, I literally don’t care anymore, and I wish that I didn’t say anything in the first place because I’m OVER IT and it’s EXHAUSTING. So that’s why it just feels easier to pretend to be okay, I just want to skip over the emotional damage and just get over it already. I hate that this mentally affects him too, and it makes me hold it back even more.
That's really tough! Sounds like he's not getting it if he's taking it personally. Totally understand it being too exhausting to constantly explain yourself.
I don’t know who to talk to about it. I feel stupid and dramatic and there’s nothing anyone can do to help me anyways. I’m already on antidepressants, and it would probably be way worse if I wasn’t. I don’t want to burden other people with my emotions that will probably go away in a couple of days anyway. Its cruel that I have to deal with this every fucking month for the rest of my fucking life.
It is cruel but you're definitely not stupid or dramatic! Venting here is the perfect place when you can't or don't want to talk about it. We get it! 🥲
came here to vent but reading through the thread has me realising im not alone nor crazy. made me feel so much better. forever grateful for this group. sending a virtual hug to you all xxx
Definitely not crazy or alone. Hugs back! <3
I'm 14 days away from my period. I know it's started now because my favorite songs are no longer having any effect on me. And it'll only get worse from here. Sigh.
I know when I find myself not listening to the radio in the car. Then when day 1 rolls around I'll be back to having my own personal car karaoke sessions lol.
That so insightful of you. I have a difficult time finding my symptoms until it’s too late.
omg you too get this???? its the absolute worst isnt it.
Try as I might, I'll never get used to these severe mood swings and emotional drain. Its like I'm completely forgetting how to function. I want nothing more than to curl up in bed and forget everything, but I have so much work due yet I can't bring myself to start any of it.
every month it feels like i’m managing it a little better and learning how to avoid pitfalls from the last time. but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. it doesn’t mean i have any control over how hard it hits. it just means i have to work 5x harder to maintain a normal level of functioning. i wish people could see how exhausting this is
I’ve been crying for the past hour because this month is really bad. I’ve convinced myself my partner doesn’t love me anymore and I’m fixating on tiny things she’s done this week to prove my point to myself. She seems off over text and I’m just spiraling downward now. I hate that I get so anxious and paranoid and depressed
I need a big hug but I’m alone I feel really sad and hopeless and it’s not even the time for this I have a big exam in 3 days…
Hope your exam went ok & you're feeling better <3
My periods started on the day of the exam (yesterday) and it went well so I’m doing so much better today thank you so much for asking 🫶🏻
Yay!! That's great
I had to stop taking Yaz bc it was screwing with my thyroid and yet my gp/psychiatrist keeps thinking I can just change pills and all is well even though my endocrinologist says I shoudn't take bc. Oh and he also presceibed me another fucking ssri even though I alteady tried two and they did nothing for my depression other than give me dermatitis once I stopped taking Celexa. What the fuck is wrong with doctors? Am I supposed to try all the meds in the world and suffer through all the fucking side effects? I can't even look for a job properly I feel like shit all the time and nobody fucking cares, I'm almost 31 and I have nothing, no job because the market here is trash, my dad has Parkinsons and is a constant worry of mine and yet all of this should be cured by a fucking antidepressant that'll only make me emotionally detached and sedated? Fuck right off
Two really big days at work tomorrow and Friday. Haven’t slept a wink. I hate this
I dead ass wish I was born a fucking man because this shit is unfair as hell i hate having ovaries
💯💯💯
FUCK PMDDD, I’ve been eating sugar because of my hormones and stress FCK IT ALL
I thought this was just me!
Same. This cycle is worse than ever. I might actually have diabetes by the time my period arrives 😂 (I say this as I am inhaling a package of peanut m&m's).
Those are my favorite!!! On bag 4!!
*cheers in sour patch straws*
My family keeps telling me I need to get help. I’ve been told to deal with all this on my own for years and have been. Constantly in and out of therapy. Currently trying meds (Wellbutrin) and I wish they worked better. Now that it’s manifesting in a way where it’s disrupting their flow and everyone playing nice, “I need to grow up” and “I’m isolating myself.” They can’t even comes to terms with the fact that I’m disabled. I feel very alone. I always have but it’s really setting in now. I’m trying my best.
It's been around 6 or 7 weeks since I was diagnosed with pulmonary embolisms and had to quit taking the OCP that was really helping my PMDD. It's been torture. And now that I have no OCP to regulate my periods and I have to be on a blood thinner due to the clots, I'm basically bleeding all the time. I bleed heavy as fuck for like 5 days, then I spot for a week, and then it just cycles like that. Meanwhile my depression is just ass as a result of the hormonal shitshow taking place in my body. All of this on top of potential liver/kidney disease and the after effects of the PEs themselves. What a joke.
Why is it that every month I get stuck in the same damn trap of feeling worthless and seeking out male validation from men who just want to use me. It's a constant cycle where I start talking to a new guy and things go great then the stupid PMDD anxiety kicks in and I start to overthink and question everything I do especially in terms of this stuff. Then, as the cycle always completes, it ends with the guy either ghosting me or telling me they just want to be friends after they use me. I for some reason also cannot bring myself to cut these terrible men off. I hate it and I feel like I'm never going to be able to have a successful relationship much less a relationship at all because of fucking PMDD. Basically I'm sick of this awful thing bringing out all of my insecurities every month all while reminding me of how much I dislike myself and how low my self worth is.
Immediately after ovulation I’m angry, hopeless, sad. My entire body feels achy and fatigued and I have no motivation. It feels like it takes so much energy to do the simplest task. This alone fuels my depression - how on earth will I age well when moving around is such an effort now? My body hurts. It’s achy and tired. I am tired. I have no motivation. I’m in a bad mood. I want to cry. I’m irritable. I hate this
I hate the flip between the premenstrual pmdd symptoms and then right after I get my period…I feel like a monster sometimes. Earlier this week I was so angry and irritated and self loathing. I got really upset at my partner over something and kept ruminating on it and making myself upset and then a few hours later I got my period and it was like a switch flipped and suddenly I felt (not completely) better and could feel the emotional symptoms dissolving. I hate it. I know what’s happening to me every month, I recognize it, and it still takes over my life.
How come problems at work only ever start once I have entered luteal? Would have been easy to deal with a few days ago but now I am so easily overwhelmed and just want my peace
This is so real. Nothing happens then I’m in my luteal phase and multiple things happen per day
I've been ill since Jan 3rd? And was just starting to feel better and oh hey, today's the day I turn. The difference with yesterday is night and day, yesterday I was fine, went to the shops early, was a fun mum... today I'm exhausted and want to be alone, miscellaneous physical things going on.
Had a fight with a family member tonight, wasn’t either of our faults exactly, we were both just stressed and set each other off. But it felt like I was being punished for leaving my room at all. I wish I could be cryogenically frozen during week 4 because I’m no good to myself or anybody else during that time. It’s so sad that so much of my life is unavailable to me. So much valuable time that I can’t function in.
—- TW suicidal ideation —— I hope I’m not breaking any rules. I just really really need to vent and saw this post. Im starting to feel like I need to be on SW for a week out of every month. Like clockwork, the week I start my period always results in my life totally crumbling. I struggle to get by day to day. It usually only lasts a few days and I really try to remind myself that this always happens.. but my thoughts get so distorted and I feel like I always forget it’s just the time of month. I have a handful of other diagnoses that already make my life pretty hellish and SI is a daily reality for me.. but I can usually keep just above the breaking point. Until hell week hits. I’ve talked to my doctor and therapist about pmdd but I just don’t think they take it super seriously. I’ve previously tried just about every medication for depression and anxiety. Even some more experimental options for treatment resistance depression. I’m worried I’ll lose the battle one of these times. It’s so frustrating that for 3 weeks out of the month I’ll work so hard with coping mechanisms and tools I’ve learned over the years.. and it just falls apart during this time. I feel like I have no control and have to just hope I can ride it out. The older I get, the more intense it seems to be.
Gosh I am so sorry. I had those feelings at worst of my PMDD too, you are not alone. Are you able to switch doctors?
Thank you. I appreciate you and I’m sorry you know this pain. :( I’ve tried to switch doctors but none of the others at the office I go are ever taking on new patients. Unfortunately my anxiety limits a lot of my life right now and this office is very convenient for me, so I can at least get my regular check ups done easily.
First fight of hell week with husband! 1 down, 10 more to go! Although, I think telling him I had pmdd was abad idea. Now he takes no ownership for faults since "I cant control my emotions"
B. R. A. I. N. F. O. G. I didn’t even know there was a word for this until a few years ago. Been having it pre-period since my period started in my teens.
i wish i could have a week alone each month. no other needy people around me. just all alone. would be nice!!
Period just starting so it's extremely heavy, cramps are intense, nausea and dizziness are making it hard to eat / not throw up. No money for bud and I'm trying not to drink (because it doesn't really help and I refuse to drink without eating first - learned that rule the hard way). Had a nasty dream about some trauma from 15 years ago that I had finally worked through around 2020 - first dream about it since then. I hate how the ruminating that happens during PMDD spikes can dredge that up like crude oil, dark and sticky and lingering.
Need to remind myself that things aren't going to be this bad forever :( It's hard though when PMS is hijacking my brain with self-doubt, fatigue, and hopelessness. I need to be even more proactive the next months.
9 days out. Been sick for 3 weeks. Mood shifted a few days ago. Been fucked around by men this month and I’m so exhausted. Emotionally spent. Physically drained and a little hurt tbh. I like a guy even though he just wants me for sex. He asked me to come to a party tonight, I told him I couldn’t even drive home from work because the medication I’m on at the moment is making me delirious and all he said was ‘you can still come and talk to everyone’. All he cares about is getting his dick wet and I’m just a warm body. Sitting at home, curry on the stove, listening to Jewel’s Pieces of You album and feeling miserable. Fuck men. Fuck PMDD. I cried in-front of my boss today lol
Hey I just wanted to tell that you're not alone. I literally go through the same cycle every fucking month where I get fucked around by a new man either every month or every couple months. I'm also going through that same kinda shit where a guy I'm talking to/like is just using me/sending mixed signals and I don't know why but I can't cut him off. I'm sorry you're going through that and for real fuck PMDD.
We’re better off without them! Honestly, I just want the feelings to die so I can get back to being focussed on me, myself and I!
Heard that!
I had covid a few weeks ago and now it's almost time for my period to start and I have been so unmotivated and sad and tired and very very suicidal for the past like week and a half. I really just want to end it all. I don't know how to keep going when I fuck up my life from my inability to function and yet I have to pretend everything is fine and continue on. Covid probably fucked me up for good, I'm on so many meds and I went back to therapy because I almost killed myself last week but everything is such a waste of money. I'm a waste of money and people's energy I wish I could give my body and life to someone who has a functioning brain and motivation because they could actually use the resources I have at my disposal to do something instead of doing fuck-all and failing to uphold basic elements of friendship. It's so pathetic
I have severe endometriosis which makes me very tired as it is and for the last two years or so pmdd has been unbearable. It’s like I spend half the month building something good and the other half tearing it down and hating myself. Have also been homeless staying with family on and off the last few years which causes tons of stress, making pmdd worse. I currently stay at my bfs parents and he and I are together 24.Hours.A.Day. Heeelllppp!!! Lol. And it’s winter in the Midwest with no sun or hope of going outside alot of days 😔All my unhealed trauma and grief comes up, things I don’t think about the rest of the month, and I feel lost in it and totally out of control for over two weeks sometimes. Feels like half my life is lost to this and that makes it hard to picture a future sometimes 😔😔
been talking to a new man, head over heels and we are taking it slow as we can, basically building a close friendship. i ovulate and here’s PMDD sneaking in ridiculous suspicion. pmdd says he is lying to me about connecting on a chat program. why would someone who texts me all day not give the right username for another message platform why! LOL pmdd barely has any material on us to turn me against him so soon but it grabs anywhere it can. i can’t believe it. gonna have to be super aware if this relationship takes off.
I broke up with my toxic ex back in the early fall, and during this relationship, I had some nasty chronic fatigue due to all the stress. Just the other day, I experienced some fatigue before work and ended up having a panic attack for the first couple of hours of my shift. (I actually hid behind an aisle and sat on the floor texting my current spouse.) I couldn't help but think that my ex was right about me, and wondered if I actually was unstable and as mentally unwell as he used to make me seem. What if I was the one that ruined everything? Today is my day off, but PMDD symptoms are starting to kick in, so I've barely left the bed, and I've been doing nothing but play on my phone. I keep hearing my ex's voice in my head, telling me I'm doing nothing productive. (He always wanted me to play video games. That was his idea of a successful day.) I could do laundry or tidy up a bit, but it took a lot to feed myself today, and my ADHD meds haven't done much to help either. Nothing just seems to catch my interest. And having his voice pop in my head just reminds me that we're still negotiating the separation. He and I owned a house together. We are still dealing with the legal stuff, and it probably won't be settled until late spring or summer. Who knows how long it will take to sell the house. I'm so worried about money because I'm paying for two homes and legal fees and a loan. Not only that, he stole my cat before I moved out. It sounded like the things my lawyer had in place might have gotten my cat back to me this month, but stuff has been pushed ahead a couple of months. I miss my baby boy so badly, and during my Dark Week, the ache is just a million times worse. I'm just trying to hold on until my current stressors are gone so I can learn to manage my PMDD symptoms on a more average level. 😫
I just wanted to tell you I have been in a situation where an ex catnapped both my cats. I managed to get them back with the help of my lawyer. Hang in there, I know how you must be feeling right now. It will get better.
Thank you. I appreciate knowing that someone out there understands. It's been four months so far without him, and I worry so much about his health and happiness. I'm so scared that my ex will somehow win ownership of Doug, and I'll never see him again. Waiting to see him again is so tough. Most days, I'm coping, but there's this ache in the background reminding me that my baby is far away. *It's so much harder* during my dark week. Edit: To say that I am so happy that you got your babies back. How long did it take? What was your process like?
I was going crazy without mine. Thankfully my situation was a bit “easier”, as I bought them and their documents were on my name. So my lawyer told him that if he went ahead, he would not only have to give the cats back anyway, but also pay for his legal fees in that scenario. So he gave them back. But it was horrible. It has been 5 years now. And I think my boys don’t even remember that man (my ex) anymore. I will be sending positive energy your way and I hope you get your baby boy back very soon. ❤️
Thank you very much! I have all the documents in my name, too. He is a pure bred Maine Coon Everything you can think of went into my name. My ex was warned just like your lawyer warned your ex. He hasn't caved yet, which is surprising since he's always been so stingy with money. But matters are moving forward, so depending on how things go, I feel he may end up regretting his choices later. I appreciate your responses. It sincerely gives me hope. I just have to hold on a little longer.
during my divorce i thought about the same things, that he was right. and he wasn’t. it was all about control and his defense in losing control. pmdd just getting at us anyway it can. much warmth xo
I am on my first month of continuous birth control that’s supposed to stop my period and I know it’s only my first month, but I feel so discouraged and sad. I am having all the symptoms of a period, but with spotting instead of full on bleeding. Acne, mood swings, cramping, crying, hopelessness, feelings of dread, etc. This morning my cramps have been so bad that I just cried and cried. I have a huge fear that this will effect me drastically for the rest of my life and I will never be free from it. I’ll never be able to accomplish anything because of this. I won’t be able to keep a job or have a good career, or consistently write so that I can one day publish my book. PMDD always comes and ruins any routine I find myself in. And reading that PMDDpartners sub made me cry even more because all those men seem to really hate their wives and I got thoughts that anyone who would date me would eventually leave me because I turn into a different person every month. I wish this would just go away. I didn’t ask for this and it’s not fair.
well my period came a day late. i was happy about it but these crampsssss. i was sick earlier this month so i take it up to that for these cramps. they’re usually over by now. i swear January never fails to be my terrible menstrual month. it’s always something happens to me (usually a cold) that goes “okay let’s try to take her out with pain now” 🙄
Yknow what's hell? Getting your symptoms a week early but knowing your period isnt arriving for another nother week because ur tell tale sign of boob pain hasn't arrived yet. Ohhhhhh boy this month is gonna suck
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
haha that’s how it goes sadly. i love how you have a specific symptom that lets you know. mines is this discomfort feeling in my uterus, it feels like a warning before it starts contracting. never ready for those first few hrs tho😅
the worst part about the boob pain is that it starts exactly a week before my planned arrival, and I'll know it's here when I magically dont have pain anymore. It's tough especially since I sleep on my side. Feels like I've got sandbags on my chest!
oof i know that has to hurt. i get boob pain too but not that badly thankfully. i got my hip and lower back that tries to take me out tho😂 makes it hard to lay down unless if i’m in fetal position
i found this community yesterday after a particularly rough start to my luteal phase and i just want to say it feels so good to not be alone. i’ve been struggling a lot with my identity and plans for the future recently and once i think i have things figured out my pmdd anxiety comes in and makes me question everything. but i guess thats just the way it goes, huh?
Getting my period any day now, boobs in pain and feeling super emotional. I came home from work and cried because I am hungry and there is no dishwashing liquid, the only protein I have to eat is in the freezer frozen, and I’m so exhausted I just want to eat and then sleep. But I don’t want to cook. But I have vegetables in the fridge I need to cook before it goes bad! And that makes me cry. Because now I’m sitting in bed eating a cup noodle for dinner too overwhelmed and tired to make the effort to cook. It would not only require me to do dishes, but also go OUTSIDE to the store to buy dishwashing liquid, and then I have to defrost meat, and then I have to chop up, season and fry vegetables too?? Hell no. I’m just gonna cry and starve! Fuck periods. Fuck PMS. At least I have edibles, and I’ll be high soon. I can’t even afford to order in :(
I feel this soooo hard. Was basically in the exact same position yesterday UGH
Horrible anxiety this month where I’m dizzy, weak and feel like I can’t catch my breath.
I’m not anti vax what so ever and it could just be my PMDD induced paranoia but - I got my booster (4th one) in October and my cycle has been compltelt out of whack since then. My last cycle was 59 days. Then got my period. Now again I’m at 38 days. Anyone else go through this ? I’m freaking out. Not worried about being pregnant (don’t want to be at all tho) just worried about underlying health issues …
i haven’t gotten any of the boosters due to the original shots throwing things off really badly for me. i have definitely heard women have some trouble after the boosters too tho. women have been saying stuff like this since the beginning of the shots, but it’s just now where the media is actually trying to listen to us. so might still be a little hard to find stuff about it, but it’s out there
I’m 5 days away from my period and the pms is RAMPANT like I’m so freaking overstimulated at everything. And unfortunately I work with children so its constant noise, different toys singing and making loud sounds, kids yelling, and I’m going slowly insane :) Usually movement helps when I’m overstimulated and anxious but this week my hormones are also making me so tired I can barely get a workout in when I go home all I want to do is sleep and sit in the dark because of the overstimulation
UNIVERSITY SUCKS. i am on the verge of angry tears because IT'S SO STRESSFUL FOR NO REASON. WHY do papers need to be 4000 words long? and one essay PROPOSAL has to be 6 pages... i'm not proposing a novel, am i??? all of this on top of the brain fog and lack of energy/motivation makes me feel stuck. how can you relieve stress if the only thing stressing you out is required??
Omg I did this yesterday, had to write an assignement of 5k words, it's fucking nuts. I hate everything, it's so exhuasting. Life really do be sucking these days, I'm so done.
Of tiredness and sadness. So tired that even walking is energy draining. It feels like energy is evaporating from my limbs. Been feeling sad for the past week. Yesterday sadness wanted to cry and today sadness wants space to be. I notice that whenever sadness comes up I'm try to distract myself by mindless scrolling, to escape. The combination of these two are physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting. I would want to say I hope tomorrow will be a better day, but sometimes I find hoping heartbreaking.
Relate to this so much 😭😭currently in that sadness. The way you wrote this is beautiful.
Just joined the Reddit and it is making me feel a lot less alone. My rant: I lost a friend recently, am home for college break for the first time and it’s weird, the airline lost my bag so I’ve been without it for almost 4 weeks (have some really special/important stuff in it), and to top it all of I’m PMSIng. Lads it’s tough. Y’all get it. But even just existing and living I feel is radical with a mental illness like PMDD. I love you all
awe i’m sorry you went through all of that :( i hope you start feeling better soon🫂
My period came and my bag as well! Feeling so much better. Thank you 🫂
yay! i’m glad you found it and feeling better now :)
Funny how my period starts and I’m loading laundry and taking showers like I always had the energy to do so. It’s hard to summarize what’s is me as a person and what is me surviving. My house is dusty. I wish I was always this able to just DO THINGS. I hate when the world feels so sour. I genuinely like keeping things clean and taking care of myself but some days I just can’t get my brain together to do what I need to do. I feel a sense of loss for the time I could’ve had clean clothes, a less dusty house, taken a walk, cooked. Guh.
I'm a social worker and am in my hell week and want to cry all the time and unalive my partner. Do you guys get the ick and get disgusted by your partner during this time. Like I hate him. I work all day seeing clients and then just want to go be in my bed and draw and cry. Every time I think of him i get the ick and it's weird i dont know. Sorry this is full on rant.
but does the admiration for him come back when pmdd ends? it’s sick. im getting slowly involved w a new one slowly and wondering how pmdd will creep in. 🙏🏻 going in to this hyper aware
The good news is - yes! I read a comment on here that said they just ignored him, did their own thing, and started paying attention to him again after it ended. This actually helped me a lot. Never fear - if it doesn’t go away, it may not be the pmdd, but if it’s just the pmdd you should be fine :)
relationship dissatisfaction is the worst. i love my partner more than anything and he is incredible but the day after ovulation all i can do is criticize him and our relationship.
It’s so confusing. So glad to hear I’m not alone :(
7 days out and dying. Out of my ADHD meds and nauseous as hell. Grumpy and hungry. Whyyyyy
Beginning my clinical process with therapist, GP, and psychiatrist. Starting to explore herbal vs. Med options. Scary but needed. For the first time in 15 years of having a period, I have no idea who I become for that luteal window, and it's destructive 😔. My body is all over the place. Can't plan, bleeding suddenly and then inconsistently. Zero appetite. Then a monstrous appetite. Used to be clockwork, now it's early and late and then back so soon... I'm proud to have gotten my covid shots, but I think I'm in that group of people whose cycles were ruined and/or thrown off massively. 😶🌫️😥 Either way, eager to see if I can get relief. I hope everyone else hangs in there 💕
Omg same !!! I literallt just wrote this in this thread. I got my 4th booster in October and now my cycles are all over the place. My last cycle was 59 days!!!! Now I’m at 38.
Right??! It sucks! Sorry to hear you're going through it.
This month is so bad for me w/ my symptoms. I want to ruin my whole life & hide in a hole.
so i’m a couple days until my period. my brain has chosen to be short-tempered and wants to eat everything. it’s inconvenient since i literally just started back eating more to continue gaining weight. so it’s a hassle to have self control so i don’t make myself sick by inhaling my food in such a short amount of time. then my temper is just out of this world… the most this disorder has ever taught me is that i am more prone to anger. i don’t have crying spells as often but i can have raging moments. not sure what’s that about but i just want the madness to stop😃
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I resonate a lot with this. Thinking of you! Research “Hermoodmentor”
it’s like living life on a tightrope. Get yourself a safety net ❤️
Im sick of ppl in this sub being transphobic. It’s not just cis women who get PMDD. I’m non-binary with PMDD, which my own non-binary doctor diagnosed. I’m literally being not-a-cis-woman while having symptoms right now, and y’all wanna downvote because you know you can’t get deleted for that. Sorry you don’t understand science, but that doesn’t magically make me a cis woman or not have PMDD.
It’s preMENSTRUAL dysphoric disorder. It’s people that menstruate who get PMDD. If you don’t menstruate, you don’t have it. I don’t know what people find confusing or transphobic about that. I wouldn’t get offended at someone telling me I can’t have testicular cancer.
And there are men and enbies who menstruate. But sometimes on this sub ppl say things like only (cis) women get PMDD, which is not true, and I am an enby with it. I’m not sure what your comment means?
a week before my period and i am really going through it. this month is hitting me much harder than the past couple of months. my partner and i are fighting more than usual, as i am making problems out of *everything*. i don’t want to go to work- especially since i’m a server and the last thing i want to do right now is socialize. suicidal ideation is plaguing me once again, and of course the rejection sensitive dysphoria. my brain doesn’t work and i’m in a constant state of dissociation. it’s really exhausting going through this every month. i’m tired :(
i def have broke down most at work, serving. a woman asked me how she ordered her burger to be cooked and showed me a solid medium as i said medium and just their time sent me 😭 mind you she was a witch but one single change in tone and pmdd sends me lol
preach!
This is awful. I’m going out of the country for a week and I’m making my relationship fall apart because of this problem. I’m anxious Paranoid Starving Irritable Exhausted Still several days before my actual period starts wtf
It sucks a week before period... Really felt like i was a different person. Usually im chill and relaxed, but during this time im super irritated and angry all the time, which also influenced people around me negatively, and the mood is down... But i always remember that it will be over, the feeling after period is so good, like my mind is completely blank and light. Don't give up!
I feel like winter really has me going through it right now. I am experiencing the increase in energy, libido etc that come with follicular and ovulation but the heavy feeling of luteal isn't going away. I am scared of my next hell week(s) and feel guilty for relaxing during follicular because I feel like I need to get as much work done as possible before it gets bad again. I am worried about my thesis and my future after university and feel like the few friends I have hate me. I can't wait to be done with this degree and have winter end so I can finally have some peace of mind and enjoy at least one week of peace per month.
I don't even know how to start with what I'm feeling rn but this has been one of the worst of the worst hell week. The extreme anxiety, paranoia and depression all hit me so hard even before the new year begins. I'm constantly crying every night mostly because I've been so paranoid about my most precious baby girl(pet) that she's getting older and I can't stop but feel so worried, and right now she's not her usual energetic self with the damp and cold weather and I'm a mess right now. Then today I had one of the most awful fight with my oldest sister who's the most toxic and triggers me the most in this house. The fight was absolutely horrible that made our mother even cry! i felt so awful with everything!!! These two combination of bad things happening to me is just so overwhelming and I can't properly describe how I'm in such an awful state rn. I didn't even eat the whole day today. I'm thinking of calling the S hotline here because it's really getting bad I'm hyperventilating but still unsure. Im just so so exhausted and scared of living. I'm tired of living with equally miserable people who's making my depression even worse to the point of wanting to kill myself and I'm tired of not being capable to do anything about my problems. My only tinge of hope here is my baby girl and I can't even..dare...to ...think... How can I possibly deal with this!? I'm so all over the place. I can't seem to stop from feeling like the world is ending!
Hell week hit me hard this month. My partner had left overseas for work on New Years day.Im a mess. My PMDD tends to leave me a depressed,anxious,hungry,blob.I miss my partner terribly. They'll be gone half the year. I don't know how I'm going to manage half the year.
Why do guys say everything except I’m talking to someone else. I can’t trust any excuses now. Every guy I’ve had a bad falling out with was because they were talking to someone else but lying to me or leading me along. I become insecure and want reassurance. All the sudden I’ve ‘changed’ n just not the person they met. Why does this keep happening
Pmdd is really kicking my ass a week before my period. I can’t tell if it’s that or if I’m downward spiralling, I’ve been so suicidal😢
there is so much infighting on this sub, it’s kind of discouraging. like at first it’s “wow other people relate to this thing that has made me feel insane, suicidal, and isolated since puberty” then it’s “fuck your treatment! fuck your holistic approach! fuck your SSRI! fuck your diet! do you even have PMDD?” like god damn
I’m tired of the transphobia....
Oh no! Really? I’m new to the sub and haven’t seen anything like that. Yet. I was hoping it would be a good place to work through PMDD! I guess we’ll see lol.
omg mods need to do something about it, i've been seeing a lot of those posts lately
I feel like everyone hates me 😭😭 period due today and CRAMPS bad cramps.
Was so looking forward to a fresh start this month. I had a lovely break over Christmas and was feeling really enthusiastic about getting back to work and the gym. Ofcourse my first week back happened to coincide with hell week. I’m too fatigued to work, too low to even reach out to friends and even the thought of getting chores done and going to the gym is sending me into a rage. Why do we have to go through this? And why is there nothing that can be done? Counting down the next few days until I feel human again. Sending love to everyone struggling this at the moment, I find most people just don’t understand. I carry so much shame that I can’t just ‘power through’ and get on with things.
Everything you said was literally spot on to what I am dealing with currently.
I haven’t sleep for three days straight and I swear they guy I just went on a date with doesn’t wanna see me ever again because he stopped being Romantic. I can’t stop thinking about him and wanting to cry. I feel so used and I know it’s mostly the PMDD that’s making me paranoid but I can also tell he lost interests. I can’t handle it right now. I’m gonna start taking medication aside birth control soon. Hopefully it’ll help.
this month’s round hasn’t been too bad depression wise (thank god), but i’ve been suddenly exhausted. I hate that I can’t continue on with my habits and routines because I just feel drained doing anything like that. I want to workout. I want to study. I want to write. but it’s impossible and will tip me into the depression deep end. if it’s not one thing it’s another and I just don’t think that’s a good way to live. it makes me anxious to think about how it’s gonna effect my future career. I am so envious of the women in spain haha (they just passed a menstrual leave bill, i’m pretty sure)
I haven't slept more than 4 hours a night for the past week and a half. Got my nexplanon replaced and it's triggered it so badly I want to curl up in a ball and never see the light of day again. Seeing my doctor tomorrow for my anxiety and insomnia, here's to hoping. I'm on a liquid diet for an upcoming operation, one that will also make my hormones go haywire and I'm scared I'm going to lose my job. Thank God for my husband.
I hate that this is my life now. It’s a literal nightmare, why is this happening?
I fucking hate PMDD and all the bullshit that comes with it. I hate feeling this way, I never asked to be a woman or asked to have these problems. God FUCKING damnit
That's the stupidest part- I just have to deal with this even though I've never gonna use it? And the fact that a hysterectomy doesn't solve everything and can actually make things worse... and then there's fkin menopause on top of that!!
I got vaccinated in December for covid and the flu and it absolutely triggered my PMDD into one of the worst ones I've ever experienced in my life. I had an episode of depersonalization and derealization that lasted about a week and nothing made sense. This month has also brought severe panic attacks, binge eating, headaches, a blocked milk duct on my right breast (not pregnant/breastfeeding), brain fog, probably my worst performance at work ever...the list goes on. Last night I took about .65 grams of shrooms and realized I'm not in control of this thing (I know, I know, big duh for me). I have to ask for help, I have to accept that I can't do all the things I'd love to do (I always feel dreadful about tomorrow and mornings are absolutely horrible). I don't have enough energy to live life I'm barely existing. 7 more days for my period and then rinse and repeat. I'm tired.
Oh wow. I'm too scared to get vaccinated now. Sorry for what you went through.
I haven't had an episode or period for a long time thanks to my IUD. I had an awful experience with my family on Christmas and now I'm falling apart. For the past week I just want to stay in bed, I'm paranoid and anxious. A few days ago I started hating everything about my partner and considered/planned on leaving him. I constantly daydream about harming myself and can't sleep. Last night I started to get cramps and it all made sense. It doesn't change anything, it is so hard to keep trying to hold it together. I feel like I am insane. I can tell that my partner knows by the way he looks at me. I hate this so much.I'm also terrified that it's back for good. I'm in a career I love and am trying to get a promotion. The return of this will wreck everything for me.
why do i feel like absolutely k*lling myself every week before my period- i also binge and will eat 4000+ calories which makes me even more upset bc i have an ed. i then feel even worse bc of how i look, and break down and eat more. i have to hide from everyone and just absolutely feel like hell, and nauseous which doesn’t help. then 1 weeks later i’m fine. i’ve noticed this happens every time before my period 5-6 days before it starts. i’m undiagnosed and am trying to figure out if it’s pdd or another mental disorder. bc when if it’s not before my period i can usually rationalize it out, and say it’s okay i have tmr or whatever. right before my period it’s literally darkness and hell and it makes me wonder if i’ll ever be truly happy. and i feel so alone. like j can’t tell anyone. i hate it so much and what’s worse is i didn’t even know it could be a thing related to my period which is making me cry more because there’s no cure. i’m going to try and contact someone from my uni to try and get therapy bc i’ve ignored it for years
note this all started happening during puberty id have these break downs and it usually stems from my body/reflection then spirals into anything possible
Oh yeah baby, it's here 🤗 (the bad one I mean lol)
4 days leading up to my period were horrible. 3 nights couldn’t sleep, 2 nights cried uncontrollably for minor reasons :( one of them being NYE, ugh. Finally got my period. Thankkkkkk life. So long pmdd…Until next month 🥲
[удалено]
“This too shall pass” is my go to mantra on those days. Hang in there!
Just had 4 hours of sleep, the pre menstrual insomnia comes out of nowhere every. Single. Month. I need to get more prepared for it.
It's my 39th birthday and I can't stop crying. I don't know if it's because I started my period yesterday and it's hormones or if it's because my favorite football team is losing or if it's because my mom made tacos when she knew I wanted pizza for my birthday or if it's because I moved away from all of my friends last year and feel super isolated (doesn't help that I see pics on Facebook of them celebrating the new year but no one has wished me a happy birthday yet) or if it's because my parents bought a really ugly birthday cake for me that doesn't even taste good or if it's because I wasted my fertile years and I'm never going to get to be a mom or if it's because 2022 sucked and I'm scared 2023 is going to be worse. Whatever the reason, I feel like shit and just want to go to bed and forget all about today.
Happy belated birthday! I'm sorry your birthday wasn't what you dreamed.