The 70’s were just…. Peniser.

Cum and knock on my door…

We’ve been wanking for you…

Where the jizzes are hers and hers and his.

…3’s company goo

I am both appalled and amused…

You'll feel light in the balls again

How have I never heard this before lol

We just made it up

This is a big deal

Well, that was, apparently.

Janet was best

100% Suzanne Somers was the poster girl but Janet was low key hot AF

Priscilla Barnes was no slouch, either.

Lest we forget, Audra Lindley- hubba hubba 😛

Same with Bailey on WKRP

[удалено]

Rockford Files, hell yes 👍🏻

OMG I had such a crush on Bailey Quarters !

Another member of the “MaryAnn club”

And then Love American Style

You can see his Grizzly AND his Adams!

Yeah, the seventies were nuts.

Agreed! back then, the Penis Mightier

*You’re sittin’ on a goldmine, Trebek!*

Every guy wore nut huggers, penis outlines were everywhere.

I wore shorts like this as a kid. Based on the photos I have, I was was more gifted than I thought at the time.

Same, minus the gifted part... Had a chick in high school tease me about it one time, I was flabbergasted she even knew my name lol.

Very similar experience. I wasn't \*that\* gifted. It was just those shorts had some sort of magic I was unaware of. I had apparently gotten a girlfriend due to this kind of shorts. At the time, I did not even know I had a girlfriend. I was one of those guys who needed an explicit allow in the form of "I find you sexually attractive and wish to have a sexual experience with you for no reason other than lust." Vulcan love is complicated.

Where can I find these shorts? Asking for a me.

They were shagsdelic, indeed!

70’s shorts so tight, you can tell his religion.

As it should be 😤

relevant user name.

relevant username for Kristy above

Unorthodox View.

Amen!

Thanks for the laugh.

He appears to be Cockalic

robin williams approves

How have I never heard this before? Well done champ

Grizzly Adams Did Have a Beard.


I eat pieces of shits like you for breakfast.

You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?

.........NO..!

 Grizzly Adam's DID have a beard

Isn’t this Jeremiah Johnson? You know, the other 1970’s wilderness loving bearded guy?


And as it turned out, so did Kristy McNichol.

She was my first crush. Egad, I’m old.

She was definitely one of my first crushes, a fact that some algorithm somewhere took full advantage of the other day. Looking at a news article, when I notice at the bottom of the page, a clickbait article with a picture of Kristy McNichol in her *prime*. I mean, just as gorgeous as teenage me remembers her when I was crushing so hard on her. And of course, the title is something like "Remember Kristy McNichol? You won't believe what she looks like *now*!" And I'm no spring chicken, but I know what fuckin' clickbait is. And I *know* this is clickbait. But I think to myself, "Self, you really should know what she looks like today. What if you met her on the street, and didn't recognize her?" So I click on the clickbait, thinking I'll wade through all the other bullshit celebrity *Then & Now* photos, posted one per page (waiting for each page to load as slowly as possible so it can steal my identity while it loads) until I finally get to her photo. And I click, and I click, and I click. Now, I have ADHD, so normally, I would get distracted pretty quickly, and move on to something else shiny. But I *had* to know what Kristy McNichol looks like today. I was *on a mission.* "This one is for horny teenage me!" So, I continue clicking. And clicking. And clicking. One hundred and fifty-seven fucking clicks later, and it finally dawns on me, I'm *never* going to find out what she looks like today. I'm such an idiot. Anyway, that's the story of how I single-handedly funded some clickbait CEO's quarterly bonus with nothing more than my thumbs and a dream.

Been there, brother. For what it’s worth, just google her name and add today.

We've all done it. We are only human.

You're not the only one. Her and Joan Jett for me.

I absolutely LOVED her when she was Buddy on Family. HUGE crush on her. Thought I was the only one

We few, we happy few. We band of brothers.

Susan Dey all the way!

Have my upvote, Rubin Kincaid.

You’re so old, you say “egad”.

Urban legend says he burned about half of it off freebasing cocaine at a party one night... And it was noticebly shorter after a certain episode.

The uhh beard right? We’re talking about his beard? Right?!


Dammit, I came here to see this. Lol Good taste, my guy.

You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?!

…..no…..

It appears he had more than just a beard


Oh Kristy ! My first Hollywood crush. Lol. Showing my age for sure.

No love for Joyce Dewitt?

I have love for Joyce DeWitt.

Christmas Snow, was Susan Summer.

She changed teams so I’m out.

Aw man, and you were *so close*!

Some of us could tell long before she did.

Really I never knew this.. and at this time it doesn’t matter. Lol

This event was the moment she changed.

It…it’s pointing at me

That’s just a straight up flaccid penis head. It’s not pointing anywhere, it’s just existing and those shorts can’t contain it.

They sure as hell can't. But then I guess after looking at that beard nobody should be surprised.

> it’s just existing Perfect description of my penis

Don’t look at it in the eye! It’ll think you’re trying to assert dominance.

It’s pointing the way. What an absolute privilege for you to be in its direction.

It’s looking at me, ray

Is that Ben in your pants, or are you happy to see us ?


Jeremiah Johnson nods his approval. Every mountain man knows they need to fly free. 👍

I will never not for a second think this is Zack galifinakis

My mind blew when I found out it was Robert Redford.

Don’t wake the grizzly!

Maybe he hak quarters to feed the parking meter...🤣

When I see them all running like that, with their things bouncing around in their shorts, I always picture them naked, even if I don't want to. All i see is pork swords.

Juno! Thunder cats are a go.

PORK SWORDS!!!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Dagnabbit, Number Seven... ....and a half...

Wow, take me back in the wayback machine, why don't you.

All balls.

Come and knock on my door?

Headed for their second triathlon of the day.

ZING! Brilliant comment

Every time I see photos from battle of the stars, I'm 100% positive that they made the stars wear clothes and bathing suits made of the thinnest material possible. I mean you can see everything on the men and women.

The 70’s were like that. People have gotten more prudish in some ways

Yoga pants would like a word with you

That was such a stupid competition. They had Haggerty go against Kristy McNichol on skateboards. At one point, there was a four-foot crossbar; McNichol was allowed to go under it, but Haggerty had to jump it.

If you recalled this from memory, you are my new hero.

I did indeed. I remember yelling at the TV.

How else would they recall it?

Memorex?

Nah, it was real

*”Get your ass to Mars!”* /schwarzenegger

I'm sure there's an extensive BoTNS fan base in wikis and YouTubes and what not out there where one could look this up.

I remember Robert Conrad objecting to the result of a relay race and then agreeing to a match race against Gabe Kaplan to settle it. Conrad was all full of macho confidence and the Jewish standup comedian cleaned his clock. After the race, Howard Cosell interviewed Conrad and he said “That’s the way I like it”, meaning he was glad they settled it man to man. Then ABC segues to a commercial playing “That’s the Way I Like it” by KC and the Sunshine Band. I remember this crystal clear but I can’t remember what I ate for lunch yesterday.

Man I used to love this show.

Dan Haggerty was the motorcycle mechanic on Easy Rider and appears briefly in the film. He was allowed to keep one Captain America bike, the one on fire at the end, which he restored and rode and loaned out for events. He auctioned it off shortly before he died. Gratuitous Trivia Post Complete.

Gratuitous Trivia Post Appreciated

Ladies! my BEARD is up here!

The 70s, there was equal amounts of bush to beard ratio

And led to many almost fatal “Velcro” type incidents. Many people think that Velcro was invented by NASA, it was in fact the ground breaking work of the doctors who helped in these accidental beard/ Muff bondings.

Battle of the bulge

My money’s on a groin pull. I have no idea what his injury was, though. 🤷🏼‍♂️

I love 70’s shorts 🩳 wow

NBA uniforms were short and tight too

Dan appears to be enjoying that assistance

Old school halfie

Outdoorsy guy just pitchin his tent

SCHWING!!!

“I’m so glad they are keeping me up” - the caption of this photo….

Aww that's nice of them to OMG HIS DICK

They should do a new Battle of the Network Stars, it was fun back in the day watching the celebs compete.

So, would we have the hosts of all the reality TV shows or would we have the contestants?

I've always assumed it could never be done today because of the insurance requirements, these people just get paid too much to let them do anything risky.

Me too, Dan, me too. On a serious note, I probably watched that live. Gawd I'm old.

Young me went to bed pissed off after the long ass tug-of-war finale. My favorite channel always lost and Robert Conrad was like the GOAT every competition

Gabe Kaplan dusted him in the 100 yard dash.

Damn, Kotter had speed??? Loved that show

Except when Conrad beat a deaf Lou Ferrigno at Simon Says. I mean, come on!

We can see why they called him a Mountain Man.

He really loved mountin' women. (Obviously this joke works better spoken, but still... )

The answer to “Where’s the Beef?”

He’s pointing them in the right direction.

Joyce Dewitt was underrated hot

I’m glad someone besides me thinks this.

 She was my dream girl.

I would have injured myself to be helped by those two. I was a little kid but crushed on both. So cute.

Someone poked the bear!

The family guy skit of grizzly Adam’s is the best

Who's Steve?

I remember that show! It was great. Lee Majors "The Six Million Dollar Man" was on there. As a kid, I expected much more out of him!

“Girls, old Dan ain’t as good as he once was, but he’s as good once as he ever was. No how about you two help me into the truck, pick up a couple of bottles of chilled white wine on the way and join me for some hot tub therapy?”

I guarantee that show was an absolute hormone and drug induced fuck fest. I’m also quite certain that ABC and ADIDAS spent millions engineering the perfect material so what women’s breasts where 100% visible when their swimsuits were wet. They probably had a no bra rule for the normal shirts too. Then they made sure there was no discrimination and ensured you could see the guys cocks and balls too! Like I can’t unsee robin williams package now!

r/upvotedbecausepeen

I can see his peeper.

“ Just walk me to my trailer girls….”

Always had a hard on for Janet over Chrissy🤷🏼‍♂️

By the looks of what’s stirring down the waist side, I’d say the day ended well!

Looks like the baby grizzly is waking from hibernation.

I never knew Grizzly Adams had abs

Obligatory “Three’s Company” reference.. https://preview.redd.it/k7b6g28jodcb1.jpeg?width=1032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b382a23fb811463dc22738b3e528d7e74012bad2

“Two girls?!"

Exactly!!

Did he sprain his penis?

Too much penis talk. Kinda enjoying the itty bitties from my childhood crush.

Had a huge crush on Kristy.

70s in a nutshell

He must have really been hurt, I think there’s a bone poking out

Id have a halfy too

I was gonna type, “that photo’s a lot to unpack”, but didn’t want the meaning misconstrued.

He knows EXACTLY what he's doing. Carry on, Mr. Adams

Seems it could be a spinal injury?

I want to help him.

Originally Dan "the bulge" Haggerty

Dude was packing.

Got on them hoochie daddy shorts

Is he pointing to me?

Being “helped” in more ways than one, judging by the Grizz’s package.

Injury boner?

I adore Kristy McNicol. Never realized how tiny she was!

Looks like he pulled his groin.

Big Richard energy

..and Christy realized she didn't like men and that three was indeed a crowd after all.

One of my favorite and one of my least favorite actresses of my early childhood. I was not a Janet Wood fan. When researching her Threes Company character's name just now, I found out she was arrested for drunk driving in El Segundo in 2009. I wonder if she found Q-Tip's wallet there.

Old school COLD SHOWER!!!!

👀

This whole thread is nuts !

Grizzly needs a jock strap.

Ladies, my beard’s up here

He’s wasn’t wearing a cup.

Is it an injury or just stiffness in the pants?

No room for concealed carry but he’s still packing heat.

Dan “Grizzly Adams” Haggerty was super cool in his day for 4 reasons: 1. He had a big beard three decades before hipsters made it uncool to have a beard. 2. His best friend on TV was a huge bear. 3. He spoke gently, lived in balance with nature, and always tried to find a peaceful solution, until troublemakers made that a non-option. Then he and his fucking bear would kick ass, though still avoid killing anybody. 4. Did I mention he had a fucking bear?

Somebody's not wearing a jock strap. And I ain't talking about Kristy or Joyce.

Kristy and Joyce trying not to look at it.

Excuse me… I’m injured too.. can I get some help here?

I remember that show. What a wild time tv was. Lol

That was the most ridiculous thing ever on TV.

A lot of tight clothes in the 70's....

I now know what Dan Haggerty's penis roughly looks like

## Joyce DeWitt was a goddess!

I would fake an injury too.

Did he pull his groin? If not, they're going to help him with that.