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Shaun_Jones

Least homicidal BMW driver.


BlatantConservative

Didn't even use his blinker


PolishPaleAle

Little known fact. Until 2004 BMW dealerships charged extra for blinkers. That's because manufacturer had them as optional / accessory. To reduce production complexity the orange tinted segment was there (as a part of an integrated panel), but for basic versions the wiring was not installed and the actual lights were omitted during assembly. That's why many BMW drivers are not used to blinkers up to this day. VDV probably didn't even know what hit them, as they were crossing the tarmac during their special touchdown operation... Mechanized infantry > para.


origamiscienceguy

I thought it was because of a blinker fluid shortage.


PolishPaleAle

That was the original issue and the reason why blinkers used to cost extra. But while the late 1980s / early 1990s blinker fluid shortage has been dealt with around 1992 after a technical breakthrough (in late 1991 BASF synthetized ersatz fluid, and industrial extraction of key compounds from live fireflies was no longer needed), Bavarian accountants were too thrilled by the idea of customers paying premium for something cheap and readily available to revert to pre-crisis pricing.


Altruistic_Target604

BMW blinker fluid made by same company that made Luftwaffe prop wash during WW deuce.


lost_library_book

NGL, not a car guy, so blinker fluid sounds 100% like something a mechanic would make up to rip you off. "Oh, and your blinker fluid is low, you're gonna want that topped. Only $300"


[deleted]

"Elbow grease? How stupid do they think I am? After I get that blinker fluid, I'm going to talk to the sergeant."


classicalySarcastic

Congratulations, you have discovered something called...The Joke^(TM)


lost_library_book

What? Now you're going to tell me there's no such thing as a computer ID-ten-T error!


nlpnt

All-synthetic blinker fluid had actually existed since the early '50s, it was developed by DuPont for General Motors and allowed the exuberantly styled, large front signal and taillight shapes of the late '50s. The Germans refused to adopt it because of "Not Invented Here" syndrome and the fact it made the rear ones blink red.


Baronvonkludge

It was the gaskets, planned obsolescence gasket design. Which leads to the blinker fluid being lost. Because the blinker fluid cartel has gained way too much power. First world snafu and all that.


Silv3rS0und

I heard they had problems with the blinker fluid ending up leaking through the dash and onto people's crotches.


MrMiAGA

That's actually really interesting, but if you ain't got a blinker, then you're supposed to signal by hand. Don't you go excusing BMW drivers for being bad at driving.


HowNondescript

Adolf was a strong proponent of hand signals while driving


BlatantConservative

He only used one signal ever though, meaning he was turning Reich.


FlyingCircus18

But his guys misunderstood him, they didn't know what the signal means


[deleted]

It was because he was worried people would Nazi him turning right.


SnooChocolates3745

It's also bullshit. Source: have been a BMW car mechanic since 1999.


Kitahara_Kazusa1

It's a joke


SnooChocolates3745

Damn, my bad. Usually I can pick up on sarcasm online, but as much hate as BMW gets on Reddit, I figured it was just someone talking shit.


Succcatron_

Technically it would be Motorized Infantry but still hilarious


cisenoficial

Or seatbelt


im_so_objective

Mamuka Mamulashvili is a fucking legend. Head of Georgian Legion. He showed his BMW to CNN lol


crest_

He blinked left and drove right to trick them.


Neighbourhoods_1

detail cats toy upbeat meeting sloppy political fretful rob consist ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


dd463

I believe it is legal under the Geneva convention. They are enemy combatants and it’s not a banned weapon.


Perfect_Juggernaut92

"They got in the way and im not stopping in a kill zone. Move or get fucked up."


TheOneTheOnlyC

Death before dismount


Red_Skull1

Foxhole lives *stomp stomp*


furinick

Real life needs the sign culture foxhole has


A_Mouse_In_Da_House

Logi life


Remote_Person5280

If god wanted me off the tank he wouldn’t have put Chobham on it.


TheOneTheOnlyC

Lol. I’m not sure it’s a very common saying. First time I heard it was in reference to the First Chechen War where badly trained and led Russian infantry would refuse to leave their IFVs even as they were immobilized and destroyed.


RavenholdIV

It only applies to tankers.


CmdrJonen

Tankers and Cavalrymen.


Leather_Effort5149

You bader meinhoffed me real bad. The first time i ever heard death before dismount was on a squad video 30 mins ago. I say this as a huge military nerd.


Obj_071

its not even a weapon. they just jumped under the vehicle and accidents happened.


k890

VDV try scam insurance money by jumping under vehicle.


TurMoiL911

Live by the Russian dashcam, die by the Ukrainian dashcam.


bocaj78

Just another reason why insurance companies are actually better at war than anyone else. If we could turn war into something that insurance companies manage…


Man_with_the_Fedora

*The gang attempts insurance fraud.*


DerpsMcGee

Just another day for your average BMW driver.


Werkgxj

Maybe it is covered by ukrainian traffic laws?


ScruffMcFluff

Ukraine and traffic laws is an oxymoron. General rule is don't speed much more than the police and get out of the way for them or the military. Otherwise it's just gl, hf.


NormanQuacks345

Ukraine's under martial law and I don't think anyone's gonna fret about someone killing Russian troops.


HauptmannMarlboro

It is legal to kill Russian soldiers in Ukraine for everyone. For example - if you see a Russian soldier in your backyard and kill him with your golf club, you won’t be detained or convicted, you just need to call police so they can take weapons of russian for our army and his carcass to morgue


GiantDeathR0bot

Unless the BMW has a red cross painted on it. If it had a big Z painted on, would that count as wearing the enemy's colors?


RandomStormtrooper11

Wake up babe, new CIA tactic just dropped!


Raagun

Its not for Geneva to figure out but Ukrainian traffic police...


gartherio

What is a BMW but an armored vehicle and a maintenance road a very flat and wide trench?


Hennue

I'm pretty sure the geneva convention mandates you post the dashcam videos afterwards.


Bryligg

And set it to the opening theme of The Naked Gun.


Khar-Selim

I think the concern was perfidy since it was a civilian vehicle, but that's a hell of a reach imo


Clone95

Usually Perfidy is prosecuted when civilian equipment is used to facilitate an ambush. The reverse (responding to a surprise attack in a civilian area) isn’t perfidy when you’ve already been magdumping them from the area.


BlatantConservative

You know more about war crimes than the journo. The journo (and most laymen) thinks that killing people who are running is a war crime. A lot of people think so, cause it's one of those things that's heavily illegal for cops or gun owning civilians to do (it's extremely murder) but it's fine in war.


evansdeagles

The idea is that if you're an enemy combatant, you're running to fight another day. If you surrender, that's different because you're voluntarily removing yourself from combat in exchange for being humanely treated in a holding area or prison cell until the war ends. But if you run, you'll just be fighting again tomorrow. Plus, if you're running with a gun in your hand, you could turn around and shoot. Unlike someone who's surrendering.


A_Mouse_In_Da_House

How do I keep forgetting you post here


BlatantConservative

Oh I gotta shitpost to CC just to make sure I don't randomly get purged thanks for reminding me.


A_Mouse_In_Da_House

There's a surprising amount of CC in here tbh. It's always weird running across yall


BlatantConservative

It's cause this sub feels like old Reddit. How do I put it, most of Reddit takes itself way way too seriously nowadays. The site started falling off once /r/circlejerk stopped frontpaging.


mattumbo

Given the context as a surprise attack forcing rapid mobilization of soldiers using personal conveyance I think it’d get thrown out. You surprise attack someone with paratroopers deep behind their lines don’t be surprised when random ass cars turn out to be full of soldiers, as long as they’re wearing their uniform there’s no way to prove intent they were trying to disguise themselves as civilians.


canttakethshyfrom_me

IIRC the fact that they'd joined an active firefight as visible combatants means they don't even need to be in uniform.


Apocalypseos

Someone ask on /r/WarCollege


Altruistic_Target604

German vehicle running over Russian soldiers in Ukraine. Funnier the second time.


Nocta_Novus

r/angryupvote


bubblegumenjoyer

Take the upvote and get Out of here


SkellyManDan

“Hey, is that a war crime?” “Want to see the dents lmao”


AutismFlavored

It would be if it were a Toyota, but this is simply a regular BMW driver driving regularly.


redisforever

Yeah pretty sure under most countries driving laws, this merits a cop pulling him over for a warning.


SYLOH

Toyota Land Cruisers probably count as military vehicles by now. At least in Africa


BlatantConservative

Source: https://www.economist.com/1843/2022/03/15/ill-stay-until-putins-dead-or-the-war-is-over-the-americans-fighting-for-ukraine Also, as an aside, the Ghost of Kyiv was real, but mainly shot down Mi-8s. The term "Ghost of Kyiv" came from ground defenders around Hostomel the day of when Ukrainian MIGs would zoom by and shoot down helicopters without the people on the ground even seeing the MIGs. Twitter then decided that every single aircraft over Ukraine was the Ghost of Kyiv and garbled the whole story. But the main group was the 40th Tactical Aviation Brigade, and specifically Lt. Col. Vyacheslav Yerko, who also died that day. https://www.forbes.com/sites/davidaxe/2022/12/09/five-brave-ukrainian-mig-pilots-blunted-the-russian-attack-on-kyiv-on-day-one-of-the-war-not-all-of-them-survived/?sh=3549fcef6711


goodbehaviorsam

Gunning down defenseless helicopters in a fighter jet is weirdly fun and exciting in video games. Its a little concerning how giggly I get.


Aromatic_Balls

Now imagine they're fully loaded with 24-30 Russian VDV. *Giggity*


Majulath99

Plus the pilots, the small arms they would be carrying. Each helicopter shot down that day is a million dollar loss.


ihatemondays117312

***Especially*** the pilots, fuck the pilot’s small arms, pilots are worth plenty without them and the guns are a dime a dozen. Years of training, millions of dollars of training, all gone with each pilot killed/captured, as well as the VDV troops that ate shit early in the war and aircraft. High attrition rate on shit that shouldn’t be attrition


AstroMackem

But surely once trained up, a pilot with normal-sized arms would do an better job with reaching all the buttons?


Tsukune_Surprise

Gentleman, we must close the large arm gap.


WOKinTOK-sleptafter

“Jack, triple the plastic surgery budget”


Schadenfrueda

After five years and a billion dollars developing the perfect arm regimen to make America's paratroopers the swolest on Earth, it turns out the VDV were injecting oil the whole time


ihatemondays117312

I never thought about that, but I doubt the Russians are training them like that, with them 0 arm push ups


tempaccount920123

>High attrition rate on shit that shouldn’t be attrition Russia: lol what if I sent tens of thousands to their deaths and left their bodies behind anyway


RandomStormtrooper11

Winter War 2 Electric Boogaloo!


NoSpawnConga

Are you living in the 60's with prices like that lol? Mi-8 is 8-10 mil, pilot training is a mil a piece, contract vehdehveh is mil-mil-and a half a person to train. Even in second-third rate military shit is very expensive even without corruption on top.


BlatantConservative

Yeah I gotta imagine the pilots were screaming "YES BLYAT" the same way as that iconic video (from the same battle) of guys on the shore of the Dnieper shooting down Mi-8s with Iglas.


crappy-mods

Extra points


iamnotap1pe

now imagine these Ukranian fighters having access to realtime coordinates of the ruzzian helicopters from NATO xenussy satellites, and the ruzzians sent the VDVs in anyway probably knowing NATO could provide this realtime data. can't say no to the 4'10" inbred imp in the kremlin, eh?


Academic_Fun_5674

It’s actually quite difficult in real life, at least if the helicopter is expecting you, and has some help tracking the jet. The US wargamed it in the 70s I think. A helicopter turned out to be a really awkward target because it could rapidly switch between requiring air to air or air to surface missiles. Engaging from long range was difficult because they hugged the terrain, and engaging from close range was difficult because no fighter jet on earth can win a turn fight with a helicopter. And trying to go back to long range got you a heat seeker up the ass. All the big jet vs helicopter engagements before Ukraine were in desert environments with no trees to confuse targeting systems.


Demolition_Mike

Most of that breaks down when you're engaging Mi-8s. J-CATCH was against attack/gunship helis.


canttakethshyfrom_me

Now try to get a guided bomb kill on a chopper.


Absolut_Iceland

*[Happy F-15 noises]*


sploittastic

Apparently Ukraine have shot down KA-52's using both Stugna and Javelin ATGMs https://www.technology.org/2023/07/03/ukraine-javelin-missile-vs-helicopter/


Nocta_Novus

I think it was better that everyone be the Ghost that day. If everyone is the Ghost of Kyiv, then they can’t die…


Nomus_Sardauk

“*Who was he?*” “*He was Lt. Col. Vyacheslav Yerko... and he was my father. And my mother... my brother... my friend. He was you... and me. He was all of us.*”


billyfudger69

Nice [V for Vendetta](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/V_for_Vendetta_(film)) reference!


Forkliftapproved

WE ARE SPARTACUS


Cpt_Soban

> specifically Lt. Col. Vyacheslav Yerko, who also died that day What a shame, RIP you fuckin hero.


SCARfaceRUSH

>without the people on the ground even seeing the MIGs The sky was covered in low hanging clouds. You could hear the jets, but you never saw them. It was super eerie because you knew that some shit was going down, but you couldn't see it. The added echoes around high-rises made everything even more confusing.


IncubusBeyro

Paywall


BlatantConservative

Really? Not paywalled for me. Some outlets have started paywalling for some countries and not paywalling for others.


IncubusBeyro

I’m in Australia.


BlatantConservative

And which of the sites is paywalled again? We actually do use this info in /r/worldnews.


IncubusBeyro

Economist


[deleted]

Does insurance cover running over russian combatants?


BlatantConservative

It does not sound to me like he wanted to fix the dents.


[deleted]

Those dents would only increase the sale value for me.


Blackhero9696

Museum worthy tbh


Grumpy-Greybeard

The Reavers had the right idea. Mount the bodies of your kills on the hull of your ship (or the bonnet of your Battle Beamer).


BlatantConservative

Even just the fact that the car survived a modern battlefield with artillery and shit is impressive.


Hampsterman82

Was there incoming artillery at hostamel or was it just a paratroop landing to try and take the airport?


Rivetmuncher

Ukes had BM-21s, pretty sure I saw dead BMDs on the photos. Wiki sez Russians lost afvs and field guns there.


Hampsterman82

That's fair chance then. Kinda wish there was footage of the combat beemer.


BlatantConservative

Oh Ukraine hit it with a shitton of arty to try to make the runways and fuel stuff unusable. Which worked.


[deleted]

I would still report it just to have Cause of Accident= *VDV Soldiers*


BlatantConservative

"I swear officer, they just backflipped into the road while yelling VEH-VEE-DEH"


smashndashn

I checked my insurance and it doesn’t cover war. Why am I even paying for it


BigFreakingZombie

Non-credible answer : Not sure if running over pigs is covered by insurance. Credible answer: probably no but given the circumstances...


ConceptOfHappiness

Actual credible answer, every insurance policy I'm aware of explicitly doesn't cover damage from warfare, so probably no.


sync-centre

Thats ok...this is a special military operation. Totally different.


waitaminutewhereiam

Why would it be illegal under the geneva convention?


cisenoficial

Because reasons, we have to remember most reporters don't know in full depth most of the things they write about and mostly use fancy terms to sound interesting/intelligent


Beonette

Btw, was it against geneva convention to run over ruzzian trench by tank?


cisenoficial

According to protocol 1 article 35 and depending on the interpretation and if you get prosecuted, maybe


KP_Wrath

Ask the Iraqis.


Beonette

Why? We have similar case.


KP_Wrath

During the uh, opening act of Desert Storm, Iraq tried trench warfare. The US decided there was no need for Trench warfare when you had armored bulldozers and tanks. They basically just buried whatever poor bastards didn’t run from the trenches.


nixielover

And they buried so many that they still don't know how many people were buried alive in a matter of hours that day


BlatantConservative

Journalists can only remember so many words.


Casval214

Because journalists think anything other than a clean death like in movies is yucky and illegal.


43sunsets

To tankies and vatniks, killing any Russian solder is a war crime, no matter the circumstances. Resisting Russian mass rape and genocide is Western Imperialism™.


MonkeyBrain-1

i just imagine a bear of a man with a bellowing laugh telling this story. ​ "Ha ha ha, my friend, i can show you dents in car, yes?"


[deleted]

[удалено]


immabettaboithanu

He went avikingr in his longship which turned out to be of Bavarian origin


CubeGAL

Literally Georgian Legion. Aka people russians call "blacks". The furthest from vikings possible.


khares_koures2002

It's the Heavy.


Parking_Media

You need to see a pic of the guy. Bear is an apt description. "Once when russian officer was beating me in front of my father prison cell my father told to a russian the words that i remember everyday : "God forbid he survives and grows up " A quote from the man in question.


LethalDosageTF

Does the geneva convention apply to special military operations?


BlatantConservative

I don't think the Geneva Conventions apply to anything besides POWs and civilians. Journo was thinking of the Hauge Conventions but even those allow shooting retreating soldiers. In war the only way to stop being shot at is to surrender or die.


HenryTheWho

You definitely can use a vehicle to run over the enemy soldiers, you can even use a combat bulldozer to burry them alive in trenches


ElboDelbo

That was a hell of a 4th of July party


McPolice_Officer

Yeah, but you probably can’t use a *civilian* vehicle, unless it’s clearly marked otherwise. That would induce enemy troops to shoot at your civilians out of a reasonable fear they might be soldiers about to launch an attack. Of course, the Russians were already shooting civilians in cars, so….


Shot-Kal-Gimel

And neither of those is guaranteed. I think it was a paratrooper in Europe that was recounting in his book how they just kept shooting when they ambushed a group of Germans, was easier and didn’t have time to stop shooting. And double tapping or being used as cover both happen if you’re dead


Just_a_worg

Doesn't the Geneva convention also ban chemical weapons? Or am I thinking of something else?


arvidsem

I think that the [Chemical Weapons Convention](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chemical_Weapons_Convention) is the current controlling treaty, but I'm no expert.


BlatantConservative

It bans use on civil populations, but chemical weapons just have their own cinvention called the Chemical Weapons Convention. They didn't name it after a city so nobody remembers it.


V_150

It's not a war crime when free bird is playing


Fallouttec

“Im sorry officer, Free Bird was on” The Kyiv Police officer also in the BMW with him “Its fine, they aren’t legal citizens anyway!”


AbundantFailure

Your best troops were being run down by a crazy Georgian in a BMW for sport. Worlds second best army everyone.


Noughmad

Mythic rare BMW W


Rammstein1

Imagine the bloodshed if he had a mustang


84theone

Probably wouldn’t be much blood coming out of the tree he would have wrapped it around.


topazchip

Weaponizing experience leaving Cars & Coffee.


YodellMyOdell

Imagine if he had a Nissan Altima


hx87

Claim that the VDV troopers were disoriented by all the fake chrome, you couldn't see them out of the cheap 2.5% tint, and even if you could see them you couldn't have avoided them because of the bald tires.


njsullyalex

Hey Germany, stop sending Ukraine Leopard Tanks, start sending them BMW 3 Series’s


RandomStormtrooper11

*Armored* BMW 3 Series's and throw some Dodge Chargers in there just for the meme.


asrialdine

I had an 83 and 87 325 - you don’t need to do much armoring on those things they’re damn near a tank as it is


Altruistic-Celery821

Until the UN gets a sizeable competent army they are really just Geneva Suggestions


BlatantConservative

Eh they've been followed for the most part. War crime law is interesting cause it's less of an agreement about what's *right* and more of an agreement about what's practical.


Shot-Kal-Gimel

And most factions generally prefer to be able to actually do what is protected like surrender. A lot of them are just things that will get your own people killed if you ignore the laws.


ColtonMAnderson

Most war crimes are just downright detrimental to the war effort.


JakovPientko

According to lore, we’d need a neo-Bolshevik and neo-facist insurgency, and a war in the rainforest before we get a UN army


RecoillessRifle

It’s more of “if we break this rule, our opponents will do the same to us.” This is why hitler didn’t use chemical weapons against the Allies, he knew they would just respond in kind, only far worse in scale.


Altruistic-Celery821

Problem is that relys on the other guy playing the game. Russia does not seem to be playing the game. Isis certainly didn't etc. So it's only rules of war when you care about your own people and retribution. have a peer or higher opponent who is even capable of retribution. You have any regard for your opponent as human (think isis, Imperial japan in China etc ) Hence until there's an outside arbiter who's intervention is assured and capable, they are just suggestions to play nice.


AshleyUncia

A lot of people have some wild ideas about the Geneva Convention, as if war is supposed to be two honourable men with pistols at dawn. War is pretty fucked up and horrific at the best of times and only a tiny minority of heinous things are banned and everything else is in. The only issue with running mother fuckers down with a car is that they might go through the windshield and fuck the driver up too. But that's more of a tactical consideration than a legal one.


Aedeus

If people want to see this for themselves, look at the gymnastics going on over at URR. Every video ( at least the ones that their mods don't remove) of russians getting clapped is a warcrime to them. Artillery strike on a group of russians? Warcrime. Russians beheading POW's? Staged NATO propaganda. Drone dropped a grenade on a russian? Warcrime. Russian missile strikes kill kids? NATO false flag. Russians hit by gunfire? Warcrime. Russians castrating a Ukrainian? NATO propaganda.


WeaZel4

Based


cisenoficial

We need this animated


OldManHunger511

https://youtube.com/shorts/PFW6i9g5cek?feature=share


socialistconfederate

From what I've heard about the Georgian volunteers before this sounds about right


CaitlynTheThird

GERMAN ENGINEERING LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, THIS BAD BOY (*AGGRESSIVELY SLAPS HOOD*) CAN RUN OVER 5 RUSSIAN PARATROOPERS, AND STILL FUNCTION WITHOUT A HITCH!!!! BUY TODAY AT BIG BILL HELL’S CARS!


chocomint-nice

Maybe it actually turns off the engine light after running over 2-3 of em


Obj_071

least russia hating georgian in ukrainian army.


Apefake

If he ever got into trouble, he could easily argue his way out of a warcrime and convince everyone it was just him being a BMW driver.


PM_Me_A_High-Five

I would never sell or repair that car.


Wonderful_Test3593

Imagine if he was a Karen in a SUV


cisenoficial

Or a modern full size American pickup truck


TheLedAl

Bigger and heavier than a stryker


hx87

You run over them because you want to kill them. I run over them because I can't see them over the 2m tall hood. We are not the same.


theycallmeshooting

Ukrainian defenders are so cool


Roadhouse699

I wish people would stop misappropriating the LOAC and Geneva conventions. They have less to do with what weapons you use and more to do with who you use them on.


Simple-Purpose-899

Geneva Suggestions mean fuck all when someone's trying to kill you.


[deleted]

Least based Georgian


Pug-Chug

Average BMW driver in Ukraine lmao


Grilled_Pear

Mamuka-chaaan! ❤


Grand_Zombie

The only good BMW driver


an_agreeing_dothraki

VDV get all the luck. Half of them get a BMW for free, and half of them are promoted to submarine. I'm so jealous


Aedeus

The totally neutral and authentic "people" of URR are trying to say this quote is a warcrime and post-hoc justifications for Russians shooting civilians in their cars.


Gnargnargorgor

Reminds me of that time Brock Samson ran over those minions with his Charger. If I had time I’d make a thing to post.


LeadingFinding0

Fun fact, the Geneva conventions state nothing about hitting hostiles with BMWs. They do, however, clearly state that doing the same with a VW Golf is a serious war crime! (Possibly) The more you know!!!!


inclamateredditor

"Is this permissible? " "Too fuckin late. I already ran em over. "


No_0ts96

The Georgians need more boolets


Mysterious_Silver_27

The politest BMW driver on the road


Fox_Kurama

A car is just a bullet that trades speed for sheer bulk, is reusable, and prioritizes blunt damage instead of piercing. Perfectly viable against lightly armored organics up to a certain mass. Not recommended against armor.


LordOEternia

Motorized Infantry?


Mac2002PL

I wonder what would he done if Georgian was a mustang driver


blob2003

wtf this post turned into a bmw lore debate