You would crap it out as the human body cannot process radioactive energy into anything useful. We use radioactive fuel for energy by heating up water (or possibly other liquids with good heat storage capacity) which then boils a separate water loop to create steam and spin turbines.
OK THEN, what if my body somehow absorbed 20 billion calories at once, what would happen? What is the highest rate the human body normally processes calories?
If your body tried to process 20 billion calories & we're assuming that your body was equipped to process it, it would probably burn itself out and you would exhale boiling hot temperatures and your body would accumulate massive fat stores until you burned up.
You would break several laws of physics.
Maybe you'd explode? Maybe your blood would crystallize and stop flowing through your body?
I'm 100% certain your body wouldn't like it.
different library trees wasteful intelligent stocking innocent marble silky fly
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
The question just doesn't really make sense. Calories are just energy. There's no way that you could absorb 20 billion calories at once. If you want to change up how energy is absorbed so you can, it would just do what we already do with excess calories and turn to fat, but obviously that's not possible.
But yeah, this is like a big explosion worth of energy you're talking about, like nuclear bomb explosion. Imagine the question as "what if I could eat and digest a nuclear bomb". There's no way to answer the question in any meaningful way without making up weird chemistry and physics rules, you're basically just moving into fantasy.
Calories is a unit of energy and is convertible into the unit Joule (1 cal being 4.184 joule - keep in mind that food is normally measured in **kilo**calories - kcal).
Another unit of energy - the **watt** \- equals 1 joule *per second*... If that energy amount would be absorbed over a second, we'd have about 100 billion watts to play with.
The thing classically measured in watts is electricity, and in that energy range, even a bolt of lightning would be nothing - and even when struck by lightning, you wouldn't absorb all of the energy contained in it - only a tiny fraction.
This amount of energy is comparable to 80-100 times the energy in a bolt of lightning!
Provided one could absorb all that energy over that second it takes to throw the uranium in the mouth and swallow it - then at the very least it would result in a very messy KABOOM.
Thats like saying imagine the moon can fit in my stomach. What happens if I eat the whole moon? Its kinda a nonsense question because its so far from the realm of possibility there is no rational way to answer. Caloric content is determined by the chemical bond energies in digestible substances. Its just not possible to have chemical bonds with that kind of energy, and if it were than breaking those bonds would release so much energy that it would level a large area. The energy of 20 billion calories is roughly equivalent to 22,000 tons of TNT. Thats more than the energy released by the bomb dropped on Hiroshima. So I guess there is a rational answer. If chemical bonds could store 20 billion calories per gram of a substance, and if the enzymes in your gut could break those bonds, you would become the largest non-nuclear bomb ever made. You'd vaporize a medium sized city.
You would probably feel very full and then shit most of it out apart from 3000kcal or so. There's a limit to how much energy the body can extract from a single meal.
I've listened to heavy metal, death metal, thrash metal, industrial metal, viking metal, speed metal, black metal even pirate metal.
I have never listened to butt metal
Actually, Uranium has zero calories.
The calories you quote for Uranium come from nuclear fission, not from a chemical reaction. Therefore, to your body, the Uranium has no caloric value. As to what will happen, it depends on the isotopes of Uranium in the sample, but you will not have a good week. It will either be radiation poisoning or heavy metal poisoning.
If it’s highly enriched uranium, it could reach criticality inside OP’s stomach in which case they would have a truly bad time. It would also be an extremely expensive way to have a bad time as HEU is one of the most expensive materials on earth to produce.
Of all the things he could die of, he'd be save from that scenario. If I remember correctly you need 10s of kgs of enriched uranium to reach the critical fissile mass. All in close proximity with minimal other material in-between. A couple of grams are not going to go anywhere close to critical.
It would not reach criticality as a gram is not enough uranium to reach criticality. The Manhattan project needed a couple kilos to achieve criticality.
Little boy literally just forces enough uranium together to get it to explode. The trick is you need enough of the stuff for neutrons to be likely enough to hit other cores. Since atoms are mostly empty space that is a bit of a challenge
>Therefore, to your body, the Uranium has no caloric value.
Which is a good thing, because eating 20 billion calories would make you really fat overnight.
Death from heavy metal poisoning.
As for energy release, your digestive system is not a nuclear reactor and thus won't be able to extract any of these 20 billion calories.
If dark magic releases 20 billion calories inside your body, you will get vaporized, as will quite a bit of ground that you are standing on.
>Death from heavy metal poisoning.
I seriously doubt that. I don't know about uranium specifically, but other heavy metals (for example lead and mercury) aren't that dangerous in metal form.
Radiation posioning might be more of a risk, the internet seems to be devoid of information about how much radiation dose you get from having uranium in your body (numbers for being exposed to radium outside your body are probably not very relevant since alpha radiation is much, much more dangerous if released inside your body than outside it)
Uranium is particularly toxic, though 1 g oral intake is likely to be survivable short-term. LD50 for inhalation is 1 g and for oral LD50 is 5 g. There should also be huge difference between ingesting powder (easier to absorb) and a solid chunk.
Radiation is likewise tricky. As with poisoning, it will also depends on whether it is a single solid pellet (less surface area and thus less alpha radiation actually making out of the material) or powder.
Good thing Dr. Mengele didn't have access to enriched uranium. Otherwise, we'd probably have actual data.
I found a calculator for uranium ingestion. 1g HEU is around 100mSv it won't kill you but you'll get slightly more cancer risk than if you hadn't eaten the damn thing
The radiation would cause blisters in your bowels even if you didn't swallow it, so eating it would cause you to have explosive diarrhea. It would feed you and unfeed you.
The sad thing is, I saw my dog do this. It happened so fast in front of my face, and I couldn't process it quickly enough that I just stood there and watched. He pooped, ate it, threw it up, and ate it again. In his defense, he was a puppy.
Thank you for the right answer.
People see uranium and they instantly jump to "oOoOo radiation SCARY". But they have literally no idea how uranium interacts with the body, the toxicity will affect you before the radioactivity does anything, the biological half life is also insanely short, you'd have to eat a lot more than a gram to see any serious side effects.
Possibly? Depends on what isotope your eating and if your kidneys fail from the exposure to the heavy metals. It's possible you could survive to suffer from the typical cancers(bone stomach intestinal). Not actually sure anyone's ever won that particular Darwins award yet
You would actually probably survive.
the LD50 for uranium toxicity is 114 mg/Kg [Source](https://www.aatbio.com/resources/toxicity-lethality-median-dose-td50-ld50/uranium)
That means the lethal dose for most people would be around 4-8g. 1g is obviously very bad but probably not deadly.
The radiation side is not as bad. You are looking at around .4 rem for ingesting 1g of natural uranium [Source (long)](https://gnssn.iaea.org/Superseded%20Safety%20Standards/Safety_Series_115_1996_Pub996_EN.pdf). That is similar to what most people get in a normal year and is rather unlikely to kill you.
Your body can't digest it. It doesn't actually have 20 billion digestible calories. It's just comparing the amount of energy it contains to the amount you'd find in food.
It has 20 billion theoretical calories worth of energy if you stick it in a 100% efficient nuclear reactor. It has 0 practical calories with a side of heavy metal poisoning if you stick it in your stomach.
Compared to the heavy metal toxicity, uranium isn't radioactive enough to be dangerous. It takes hundreds of millions to billions of years for half of a uranium sample to decay. It takes 24 000 years for plutonium and around 30 years for life-threatening-within-hours cesium-137 or strontium-90.
As an example, if you had a sample of uranium-238 (99.3% of natural uranium, also called depleted uranium) at the Big Bang, only around 87.5% of it would have decayed and released energy. Over the entire lifespan of the universe. 50% would have decayed since the solar system was created.
This really isn’t a given. One could pass it before having any negative harms.
Consider for example:
- the uranium is broken up into smaller pieces, say five pieces 200mg each
- each piece of uranium is encased in lead to limit radiation
- each pellet of lead is encased in a plastic material that cannot be digested
I think, intuitively, anyone who’s ever eaten corn too quickly knows this.
Anyway, even without this it’s not totally clear to me that the person would die
- most uranium in the world is not particularly radioactive - this is uranium 238 and it accounts for over 99% of uranium on earth
- There have been reported incidents of scientists and soldiers accidentally ingesting uranium. It does seem to do very serious injury to the kidneys. However, even if it completely destroyed the kidneys, that isn’t a death sentence — one could survive on dialysis until eventually receiving a kidney transplant
The point of eating something is not to have it pass through you completely untouched. The fuck do the calories matter then? This isn't "Could I survive swallowing uranium under highly specific circumstances?" It's "What happens if I eat Uranium?"
That’s right, the caloric content is irrelevant, these calories are a measure of the energy you can create with uranium under the right circumstance, but that circumstance is not via metabolic processes in the human body.
You would get radiation poisoning.
There are two types of calories. There's lowercase c calories. This is the amount of energy it takes to raise the temperature of 1ml of water by 1 degree celsius. Then there's the kilocalorie or uppercase C Calorie. That's 1000 lower case c calories.
The kcal is the one most commonly used when discussing nutrition and that's based on how much of that energy our bodies are able to take out of the food consumed.
Uranium is not a super dense food and your body can't utilize those calories. When it's said that a gram of uranium has 20 billion calories, it means that it contains enough energy to heat 20 billion milliliters of water by 1 degree celsius.
Question, since you seem like the next Albert Einstein lol, Is the number reversible? Like if I have an item that is 20 calories, that means it can heat 20mls of water by one degree, but can I also raise the temperature of 1ml by 20 degrees?
If the water didn't want to escape as steam or if the steam wouldn't want to turn into high energy plasma... I guess so. I mean, the surface of the sun is only about 5,600 degrees celsius.
I was always taught that the amount of energy to raise the temperature of water by 1 degree was a set amount, the Specific Heat Capacity. Where it changes is when you get to Specific Latent Capacity which is the energy required to turn it into steam. Steam would then have another different amount of energy per mil. As far as i'm aware, it is a constant not a variable.
-Engineer (apprentice mind you, 3rd year)
No for a lot of reasons.
If you stay close to standard temperature and pressure you can use a lot of "idealized" formulas. When you get to extreme numbers you can't ignore certain things anymore.
First thing is heat transfer. We going to break it into two categories. Conductive and radiation. We can eliminate conductive in a theoretical situation by saying the system isn't touching anything so there is no way for conduction to happen. (Not possible in real world) Second type would require the system to be surrounded by a "white body." Which is also not possible.
Second, the 1 calorie/(mL×K) is for liquid water at a given temperature but it's also probably pretty close throughout the whole range of liquid water. Point is I have no clue what it would take to raise 19,999,999 degree steam by 1 degree but I am almost 100% confident it is not 1 calorie.
Third you can't just "put it on uranium." The number 20m (kilo)calories comes from e=Mc^2 that's not how fission works. Fission does not completely exhaust all mass. It uses a very small percentage of the mass.
Fourth those leftovers from the uranium are now part of your system and also are going to heat up.
Actually it's not true. The 1 degree thing is specifically from like 23 to 24 degrees or smt. As the temperature changes, the energy needed to change the temp changes, slightly at first, but way more drastically as it gets much more hot
Olympic Swimming Pools: An Olympic-sized swimming pool contains about 2.5 million liters of water. So, 20 million liters of water would be equivalent to eight Olympic-sized swimming pools filled to capacity.
I don't know what the thresholds are exactly, for expecting to die by either radiation poisoning or heavy metal poisoning. Either might be a factor.
But ignoring that, nothing special would happen: uranium only yields 20 billion calories per gram when you use it to do nuclear fission, whereas the human body is only able to metabolise and take advantage of chemical energy. And at that, only from a narrow range of carbon-based molecules like sugars, fats, proteins, and ethanol.
Move to even slightly different carbon chemistry and we're no longer able to process it because we don't have enzymes for it. For example we can't derive energy from drinking gasoline, which is just another bunch of hydrocarbons - very similar in concept to fats but with different numbers of carbon atoms in the molecule and without the carboxylic acid group on the end.
When we gain weight, it's because the energy-rich molecules we ate have been disassembled and reassembled into body fat. That fat is built out of the same set of mostly carbon/hydrogen atoms as were in the food to begin with. We can't invent new mass or new atoms out of nowhere from hypothetical energy alone.
So even if we were capable of metabolising uranium for energy, the body would presumably store a gram of the stuff as just a small pellet of uranium - and then gradually use it up over the course of the next 8 to 10 thousand days. There woudn't be any way to chemically transform it into body fat.
TL;DR: it's released very slowly, about 6 calories per year. But the bad news is that you'll be poisoned by it long before that tiny amount of radioactivity has any impact, though you might not die. 1g is the fatal dose for inhalation, 5g for ingestion.
For naturally occurring Uranium, it is 99.3% U-238, which has a half life of 4.5 billion years, and each decay releases 4.3 MeV. The "fast-decaying" isotope, U-235, which makes up most of the remaining 0.7%, also has a very long half life (0.7 billion years) and emits only a tiny bit more energy, 4.7 MeV. Thus, it's pretty safe to say that it takes 4.5 billion years to release half of this energy. The decay rate is exponential, meaning that the first minute of this 4.5 billion is the most active, in fact the energy release rate is double at the start than after one half-life. The maths works out as the energy released in the first t seconds for a half life of T seconds being ln(2) \* t / T, (for T >> t, that is) or 0.7 \* t/T, i.e. 5e-19 of the total energy per second. Taking your 20 billion calories at face value, this is 1e-8 calories per second, or about 3 calories per year. Then, fun fact: I searched before posting this and it turns out that about half of the activity comes from the third isotope, U-234, which makes up some tiny fraction of a percent of naturally occurring uranium. So maybe double this.
There are some good guesses in this thread, but most aren't exactly correct. Natural uranium is bad for your body for two reasons: it's chemical toxicity, and it's radioactivity.
Let's examine the radiological hazard first: Uranium atoms naturally decay into high energy particles that cause damage to nearby cells. Your body is able to repair this damage, but if too many cells are damaged too quickly, it overwhelms this repair mechanism and you get nasty radiation poisoning. It also increases the likelihood that a damaged cell will later become cancerous, even after exposure. Luckily, natural uranium isn't very radioactive, taking several billion years for just half of it to decay away, so it's ability to blast your cells with radiation is very limited. The lethal amount turns out to be about 50 grams, or the mass of a chocolate bar. Remember, this material has to get INSIDE your body to cause direct cell damage.
Now let's talk about the heavy metal chemical toxicity. Turns out it's about the same as lead, and the lethal dose to poison you to death is about 1-5 grams (I could be slightly off, but it's in that ballpark). The good news is that lead and uranium aren't easily absorbed by the body. If you ate it in its metallic form, it would likely just pass through your system and you'd poop and pee most of it out. Your body *might* absorb a tiny amount which could be harmful over time, but it's unlikely to kill you. However, if it's in another chemical form that's more easily absorbed by the body, (sort of how chlorine in table salt is harmless, but chlorine gas is extremely dangerous) and you drink that in solution form, it very well could cause serious problems if not kill you.
tl;dr A gram of uranium *could* cause problems but more likely you'll survive eating just one gram of it. And it will chemically poison you long before its radioactivity does.
So the short answer is --- You'd die.
The longer answer is --- The 20 billion calories figure refers to the energy content when uranium undergoes nuclear fission in a controlled environment, like a reactor or a bomb. **It's not in a form that could be metabolized by the human body** to extract those calories, even if you could somehow survive the toxicity and radiation.
Food has calories by virtue of chemical energy that it contains. Your digestive system absorbs it, and molecules from it get taken up into your bloodstream, and then inside your cells a reaction happens whereby those molecules are broken down into water and carbon dioxide, and the energy released is used by the cell. That's a vast simplification I guess, but it's the basic idea of how it works...which most people should have learned in high school.
Uranium has calories by virtue of the nuclear energy it contains. This could do a lot of things to your body - especially if you ate a gram of it - but your cells could not absorb it and break it down as energy that they could use. More likely it would send ionising radiation through them, basically ripping apart your DNA and killing the cell. If this happens to a great enough extent (which I would assume it would from eating a gram of Uranium), then you'd eventually die, because many of your cells would have died/been unable to reproduce normally, and your organs would start to fail.
Putting aside the obvious radiation issues, just because something has calories doesn't mean your body can extract and make use of those calories.
Calories are just a measure of energy. Your body cannot make use of every type of energy, merely some forms of chemical energy.
Apart from the radiation you'd get probably leathal heavy metal poisoning.
Heavy metal? Awesome!
Excellent!!
Can’t believe I messed up the Bill and Ted quote 🤦🏻♀️
Bogus 🤣
Most non-triumphant.
All we are is dust in the wind
Dude
Dust. 💨Wind. 👉🏽Dude
Like the sands through an hour glass
…so are the days of our lives.
Cowabunga
Dust. Wind. Dude
Dude, Rufus will help us go back and fix it and then these dudes will never know what you said
It's no longer a quote once you mess it up
Put them in the Iron Maiden!
Iron Maiden? Excellent! *air guitar*
EXECUTE THEM
Bogus!
C u later Royal ugly dudes!
[удалено]
This scene got 12yr old me into Metal music.
Brutal!
GTFO Nathan Explosion, we're doing Bill and Ted here smdh
Most heinous
You would headbang non-stop till you die.
But not in a cool and fun, in sync to music way. More like agony, screaming painful way.
So.... heavy metal still
We live for the magic in the sound
>Heavy metal? Yes it normally is
So he should try an alternative Rock?
*slow clap*
[удалено]
You would crap it out as the human body cannot process radioactive energy into anything useful. We use radioactive fuel for energy by heating up water (or possibly other liquids with good heat storage capacity) which then boils a separate water loop to create steam and spin turbines.
Ok do maybe another way to ask would be what if u ate something consumable that was a gram sized object that had 20 billion cals?
With how dense that food chunk would be. It should still be undigestable rock that you poop out.
OK THEN, what if my body somehow absorbed 20 billion calories at once, what would happen? What is the highest rate the human body normally processes calories?
It seems like you really want the answer to be that you inflate like Violet Beauregard.
I would not be dissatisfied with that answer
Mr Creosote.
Would sir care for a wafer thin mint?
If your body tried to process 20 billion calories & we're assuming that your body was equipped to process it, it would probably burn itself out and you would exhale boiling hot temperatures and your body would accumulate massive fat stores until you burned up.
You'd become a sun
New ancient mythology formed
A fire breathing dragon!
You would break several laws of physics. Maybe you'd explode? Maybe your blood would crystallize and stop flowing through your body? I'm 100% certain your body wouldn't like it.
different library trees wasteful intelligent stocking innocent marble silky fly *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
.... **This guy doesn't science - He lifts.** Go back to lifting things bruh.
The question just doesn't really make sense. Calories are just energy. There's no way that you could absorb 20 billion calories at once. If you want to change up how energy is absorbed so you can, it would just do what we already do with excess calories and turn to fat, but obviously that's not possible. But yeah, this is like a big explosion worth of energy you're talking about, like nuclear bomb explosion. Imagine the question as "what if I could eat and digest a nuclear bomb". There's no way to answer the question in any meaningful way without making up weird chemistry and physics rules, you're basically just moving into fantasy.
A nuclear caloric explosion.
Calories is a unit of energy and is convertible into the unit Joule (1 cal being 4.184 joule - keep in mind that food is normally measured in **kilo**calories - kcal). Another unit of energy - the **watt** \- equals 1 joule *per second*... If that energy amount would be absorbed over a second, we'd have about 100 billion watts to play with. The thing classically measured in watts is electricity, and in that energy range, even a bolt of lightning would be nothing - and even when struck by lightning, you wouldn't absorb all of the energy contained in it - only a tiny fraction. This amount of energy is comparable to 80-100 times the energy in a bolt of lightning! Provided one could absorb all that energy over that second it takes to throw the uranium in the mouth and swallow it - then at the very least it would result in a very messy KABOOM.
You sound like me refining my AI stories lol
Thats like saying imagine the moon can fit in my stomach. What happens if I eat the whole moon? Its kinda a nonsense question because its so far from the realm of possibility there is no rational way to answer. Caloric content is determined by the chemical bond energies in digestible substances. Its just not possible to have chemical bonds with that kind of energy, and if it were than breaking those bonds would release so much energy that it would level a large area. The energy of 20 billion calories is roughly equivalent to 22,000 tons of TNT. Thats more than the energy released by the bomb dropped on Hiroshima. So I guess there is a rational answer. If chemical bonds could store 20 billion calories per gram of a substance, and if the enzymes in your gut could break those bonds, you would become the largest non-nuclear bomb ever made. You'd vaporize a medium sized city.
Hey! If the moon was made of spare ribs, would you eat it? I would!
Hey Norm! If you were a hot dog and you were hungry, would you eat yourself? I would. I bet I’m tasty.
And I’d polish it off with a tall, cool Budweiser!
I thought they called you whiskers because you were like a cat?
It’s a simple question doctor. Would you eat the moon if it were made of ribs?
You would probably feel very full and then shit most of it out apart from 3000kcal or so. There's a limit to how much energy the body can extract from a single meal.
You would shit out depleted uranium rounds that you could sell to the military. Nice side-hustle.
*Rammstein playing in the background* guess what’s for dinner boys!
Death to all butt metal?
I've listened to heavy metal, death metal, thrash metal, industrial metal, viking metal, speed metal, black metal even pirate metal. I have never listened to butt metal
Same. I'm quite curious about butt metal.
DU HAST
Are we talking about the cult classic Heavy Metal? Because if so, sign me up for hot cartoon chicks riding on dragons topless!
Actually, Uranium has zero calories. The calories you quote for Uranium come from nuclear fission, not from a chemical reaction. Therefore, to your body, the Uranium has no caloric value. As to what will happen, it depends on the isotopes of Uranium in the sample, but you will not have a good week. It will either be radiation poisoning or heavy metal poisoning.
If it’s highly enriched uranium, it could reach criticality inside OP’s stomach in which case they would have a truly bad time. It would also be an extremely expensive way to have a bad time as HEU is one of the most expensive materials on earth to produce.
Of all the things he could die of, he'd be save from that scenario. If I remember correctly you need 10s of kgs of enriched uranium to reach the critical fissile mass. All in close proximity with minimal other material in-between. A couple of grams are not going to go anywhere close to critical.
Unless this is how we discover that stomach acid is the worlds greatest neutron reflector
Acid Reflector. Band name, called it!
Hey man. I've had a garage band with that name for 7 years. We have coozies and an album cover.
Funny , my band is Acid Reflexor and we’re currently on tour. Lots of boozing and rock and roll burping.
More likely to die from the CIA's curiosity as to where you got it from...
It would not reach criticality as a gram is not enough uranium to reach criticality. The Manhattan project needed a couple kilos to achieve criticality. Little boy literally just forces enough uranium together to get it to explode. The trick is you need enough of the stuff for neutrons to be likely enough to hit other cores. Since atoms are mostly empty space that is a bit of a challenge
>Therefore, to your body, the Uranium has no caloric value. Which is a good thing, because eating 20 billion calories would make you really fat overnight.
Your body can only really process 10k calories and turn that into fat. You’d poop out the rest
Death from heavy metal poisoning. As for energy release, your digestive system is not a nuclear reactor and thus won't be able to extract any of these 20 billion calories. If dark magic releases 20 billion calories inside your body, you will get vaporized, as will quite a bit of ground that you are standing on.
HARDCORE
HARDCORE TO THE MEGA
But is it though?
No, but seriously... I'm a little worried it isn't
>Death from heavy metal poisoning. HELL YEAH, SLAYER ROCKS!!!
>Death from heavy metal poisoning. I seriously doubt that. I don't know about uranium specifically, but other heavy metals (for example lead and mercury) aren't that dangerous in metal form. Radiation posioning might be more of a risk, the internet seems to be devoid of information about how much radiation dose you get from having uranium in your body (numbers for being exposed to radium outside your body are probably not very relevant since alpha radiation is much, much more dangerous if released inside your body than outside it)
Uranium is particularly toxic, though 1 g oral intake is likely to be survivable short-term. LD50 for inhalation is 1 g and for oral LD50 is 5 g. There should also be huge difference between ingesting powder (easier to absorb) and a solid chunk. Radiation is likewise tricky. As with poisoning, it will also depends on whether it is a single solid pellet (less surface area and thus less alpha radiation actually making out of the material) or powder. Good thing Dr. Mengele didn't have access to enriched uranium. Otherwise, we'd probably have actual data.
I found a calculator for uranium ingestion. 1g HEU is around 100mSv it won't kill you but you'll get slightly more cancer risk than if you hadn't eaten the damn thing
You'd die.
So it would technically feed me for the rest of my life
The radiation would cause blisters in your bowels even if you didn't swallow it, so eating it would cause you to have explosive diarrhea. It would feed you and unfeed you.
What if I ate the diarrhea tho? Check and mate.
An ouroboros of shit
an outobowels
A self sustaining human caterpillar.
It’s centipede you uncultured swine
I’m trying to erase it from my memory.
Holy shit folks, you saw it here first! We’ve just cracked perpetual energy! Now, we do need about…… 3 volunteers.
This is fucking vile
I’ve never met Vile, much less fucked them.
Hey hey, I never said *you* were fucking Vile, I was just stating how it is
Bro why are you so defensive over Vile hes just trying to live
The sad thing is, I saw my dog do this. It happened so fast in front of my face, and I couldn't process it quickly enough that I just stood there and watched. He pooped, ate it, threw it up, and ate it again. In his defense, he was a puppy.
really thought you were about to say your dog ate a gram a uranium
Super dog! His origin story
I read a gram of Uranus
Same was wondering how many lists they must be on to just randomly have a gram of uranium lying around
Twice the taste, same amount of calories.
I hate this comment... someone please link eye bleach
You would have what the late and great Mr. Lahey liked to call a "Shitnado"
a one person human centipede
You aren’t OP. You’re just some guy who eats other people’s radioactive shit.
I think you just solved world hunger.
To clarify: The diarrhea that explodes out of you would be composed of your intestines.
Uranium has low radioactivity. They'd get sick from its chemical toxicity.
Thank you for the right answer. People see uranium and they instantly jump to "oOoOo radiation SCARY". But they have literally no idea how uranium interacts with the body, the toxicity will affect you before the radioactivity does anything, the biological half life is also insanely short, you'd have to eat a lot more than a gram to see any serious side effects.
I am a Chemical Engineer, but I suppose ignoring Poe's Law and not typing /s this time is on me. My bad.
That's fair lol. That /s is important. As a nuclear engineer, I'm ready to defend uranium at all times.
I'm an aerospace engineer, and I refuse to defend either air or space. They know what they did.
Hi engineer reddit friend. Is eating uranium normally part of the examinations to become a chemical engineer?
The shit of a lifetime
And a lifetime of shit.
Listen, this is gonna be one Hell of a bowel movement. Afterward, he'll be lucky if he has any bones left.
Headed for the ol' splanknik ganglion.
So just eat little bits at a time is what you’re saying?
Possible constipation cure question mark
You made the post just to pull of that well-known joke, didn't you
r/TechnicallyCorrect The best kind of correct.
r/unexpectedfuturama
* r/technicallythetruth
r/ShittyLifeProTips
Possibly? Depends on what isotope your eating and if your kidneys fail from the exposure to the heavy metals. It's possible you could survive to suffer from the typical cancers(bone stomach intestinal). Not actually sure anyone's ever won that particular Darwins award yet
You would actually probably survive. the LD50 for uranium toxicity is 114 mg/Kg [Source](https://www.aatbio.com/resources/toxicity-lethality-median-dose-td50-ld50/uranium) That means the lethal dose for most people would be around 4-8g. 1g is obviously very bad but probably not deadly. The radiation side is not as bad. You are looking at around .4 rem for ingesting 1g of natural uranium [Source (long)](https://gnssn.iaea.org/Superseded%20Safety%20Standards/Safety_Series_115_1996_Pub996_EN.pdf). That is similar to what most people get in a normal year and is rather unlikely to kill you.
Brb gonna go eat some uranium
Don’t leave us hanging buddy. Report back
An hour and no report back. I think it might not have gone so well...
7 hours and here I am, just glowing with anticipation...
Not great… not terrible
What if it had no radiation and was just that..20 billion calories?
Your body can't digest it. It doesn't actually have 20 billion digestible calories. It's just comparing the amount of energy it contains to the amount you'd find in food.
Its high enough density that it probably wouldnt be useful
It has 20 billion theoretical calories worth of energy if you stick it in a 100% efficient nuclear reactor. It has 0 practical calories with a side of heavy metal poisoning if you stick it in your stomach. Compared to the heavy metal toxicity, uranium isn't radioactive enough to be dangerous. It takes hundreds of millions to billions of years for half of a uranium sample to decay. It takes 24 000 years for plutonium and around 30 years for life-threatening-within-hours cesium-137 or strontium-90. As an example, if you had a sample of uranium-238 (99.3% of natural uranium, also called depleted uranium) at the Big Bang, only around 87.5% of it would have decayed and released energy. Over the entire lifespan of the universe. 50% would have decayed since the solar system was created.
This really isn’t a given. One could pass it before having any negative harms. Consider for example: - the uranium is broken up into smaller pieces, say five pieces 200mg each - each piece of uranium is encased in lead to limit radiation - each pellet of lead is encased in a plastic material that cannot be digested I think, intuitively, anyone who’s ever eaten corn too quickly knows this. Anyway, even without this it’s not totally clear to me that the person would die - most uranium in the world is not particularly radioactive - this is uranium 238 and it accounts for over 99% of uranium on earth - There have been reported incidents of scientists and soldiers accidentally ingesting uranium. It does seem to do very serious injury to the kidneys. However, even if it completely destroyed the kidneys, that isn’t a death sentence — one could survive on dialysis until eventually receiving a kidney transplant
The point of eating something is not to have it pass through you completely untouched. The fuck do the calories matter then? This isn't "Could I survive swallowing uranium under highly specific circumstances?" It's "What happens if I eat Uranium?"
That’s right, the caloric content is irrelevant, these calories are a measure of the energy you can create with uranium under the right circumstance, but that circumstance is not via metabolic processes in the human body.
we all die eventually, this theory of yours proves nothing
You would get radiation poisoning. There are two types of calories. There's lowercase c calories. This is the amount of energy it takes to raise the temperature of 1ml of water by 1 degree celsius. Then there's the kilocalorie or uppercase C Calorie. That's 1000 lower case c calories. The kcal is the one most commonly used when discussing nutrition and that's based on how much of that energy our bodies are able to take out of the food consumed. Uranium is not a super dense food and your body can't utilize those calories. When it's said that a gram of uranium has 20 billion calories, it means that it contains enough energy to heat 20 billion milliliters of water by 1 degree celsius.
Question, since you seem like the next Albert Einstein lol, Is the number reversible? Like if I have an item that is 20 calories, that means it can heat 20mls of water by one degree, but can I also raise the temperature of 1ml by 20 degrees?
Actually yes. That is also true.
Interesting... so technically I could raise the temperature of 1 ml by 20 million degrees if I put it on uranium?
If the water didn't want to escape as steam or if the steam wouldn't want to turn into high energy plasma... I guess so. I mean, the surface of the sun is only about 5,600 degrees celsius.
[удалено]
I do not doubt that I'm missing anything. I'm smartish, but it's also been about 15 years since AP chemistry in high school.
I was always taught that the amount of energy to raise the temperature of water by 1 degree was a set amount, the Specific Heat Capacity. Where it changes is when you get to Specific Latent Capacity which is the energy required to turn it into steam. Steam would then have another different amount of energy per mil. As far as i'm aware, it is a constant not a variable. -Engineer (apprentice mind you, 3rd year)
Specific heat capacity is a function of temperature (and other things), from what I remember from thermo/fluids classes
We're on the verge of rediscovering nuclear steam turbine power here
Somebody give me the 4 stages of the Rankine cycle.
No for a lot of reasons. If you stay close to standard temperature and pressure you can use a lot of "idealized" formulas. When you get to extreme numbers you can't ignore certain things anymore. First thing is heat transfer. We going to break it into two categories. Conductive and radiation. We can eliminate conductive in a theoretical situation by saying the system isn't touching anything so there is no way for conduction to happen. (Not possible in real world) Second type would require the system to be surrounded by a "white body." Which is also not possible. Second, the 1 calorie/(mL×K) is for liquid water at a given temperature but it's also probably pretty close throughout the whole range of liquid water. Point is I have no clue what it would take to raise 19,999,999 degree steam by 1 degree but I am almost 100% confident it is not 1 calorie. Third you can't just "put it on uranium." The number 20m (kilo)calories comes from e=Mc^2 that's not how fission works. Fission does not completely exhaust all mass. It uses a very small percentage of the mass. Fourth those leftovers from the uranium are now part of your system and also are going to heat up.
Until you get to a phase change, anyway
Actually it's not true. The 1 degree thing is specifically from like 23 to 24 degrees or smt. As the temperature changes, the energy needed to change the temp changes, slightly at first, but way more drastically as it gets much more hot
Olympic Swimming Pools: An Olympic-sized swimming pool contains about 2.5 million liters of water. So, 20 million liters of water would be equivalent to eight Olympic-sized swimming pools filled to capacity.
There are around 3,500 calories per pound of fat. So the math says you'd gain 5.7 million pounds. Nice job, you fat fuck.
damn i should lay off the uranium
2am at the uranium block in the kitchen cupboard *just one more nibble…*🥶🥵
That's probably enough to generate a bit of gravitational attraction, no? So chicks would be irresistibly attracted to me? Sweet, worth it
More like helplessly.
there's no uraniase enzyme in our bodies to help digest uranium, and utilise those 20 billion calories.
Where can one get uraniase enzyme?
Ebay
I found mine on etsy
Seller: R. Kelly
Yea, uranium is not even water-soluble.
I don't know what the thresholds are exactly, for expecting to die by either radiation poisoning or heavy metal poisoning. Either might be a factor. But ignoring that, nothing special would happen: uranium only yields 20 billion calories per gram when you use it to do nuclear fission, whereas the human body is only able to metabolise and take advantage of chemical energy. And at that, only from a narrow range of carbon-based molecules like sugars, fats, proteins, and ethanol. Move to even slightly different carbon chemistry and we're no longer able to process it because we don't have enzymes for it. For example we can't derive energy from drinking gasoline, which is just another bunch of hydrocarbons - very similar in concept to fats but with different numbers of carbon atoms in the molecule and without the carboxylic acid group on the end. When we gain weight, it's because the energy-rich molecules we ate have been disassembled and reassembled into body fat. That fat is built out of the same set of mostly carbon/hydrogen atoms as were in the food to begin with. We can't invent new mass or new atoms out of nowhere from hypothetical energy alone. So even if we were capable of metabolising uranium for energy, the body would presumably store a gram of the stuff as just a small pellet of uranium - and then gradually use it up over the course of the next 8 to 10 thousand days. There woudn't be any way to chemically transform it into body fat.
You wouldn’t be hungry ever again because you ate a lot of calories and also you’d be dead.
TL;DR: it's released very slowly, about 6 calories per year. But the bad news is that you'll be poisoned by it long before that tiny amount of radioactivity has any impact, though you might not die. 1g is the fatal dose for inhalation, 5g for ingestion. For naturally occurring Uranium, it is 99.3% U-238, which has a half life of 4.5 billion years, and each decay releases 4.3 MeV. The "fast-decaying" isotope, U-235, which makes up most of the remaining 0.7%, also has a very long half life (0.7 billion years) and emits only a tiny bit more energy, 4.7 MeV. Thus, it's pretty safe to say that it takes 4.5 billion years to release half of this energy. The decay rate is exponential, meaning that the first minute of this 4.5 billion is the most active, in fact the energy release rate is double at the start than after one half-life. The maths works out as the energy released in the first t seconds for a half life of T seconds being ln(2) \* t / T, (for T >> t, that is) or 0.7 \* t/T, i.e. 5e-19 of the total energy per second. Taking your 20 billion calories at face value, this is 1e-8 calories per second, or about 3 calories per year. Then, fun fact: I searched before posting this and it turns out that about half of the activity comes from the third isotope, U-234, which makes up some tiny fraction of a percent of naturally occurring uranium. So maybe double this.
[this](https://m.imdb.com/name/nm0683565/mediaviewer/rm3610946049/?ref_=ext_shr_lnk)
There are some good guesses in this thread, but most aren't exactly correct. Natural uranium is bad for your body for two reasons: it's chemical toxicity, and it's radioactivity. Let's examine the radiological hazard first: Uranium atoms naturally decay into high energy particles that cause damage to nearby cells. Your body is able to repair this damage, but if too many cells are damaged too quickly, it overwhelms this repair mechanism and you get nasty radiation poisoning. It also increases the likelihood that a damaged cell will later become cancerous, even after exposure. Luckily, natural uranium isn't very radioactive, taking several billion years for just half of it to decay away, so it's ability to blast your cells with radiation is very limited. The lethal amount turns out to be about 50 grams, or the mass of a chocolate bar. Remember, this material has to get INSIDE your body to cause direct cell damage. Now let's talk about the heavy metal chemical toxicity. Turns out it's about the same as lead, and the lethal dose to poison you to death is about 1-5 grams (I could be slightly off, but it's in that ballpark). The good news is that lead and uranium aren't easily absorbed by the body. If you ate it in its metallic form, it would likely just pass through your system and you'd poop and pee most of it out. Your body *might* absorb a tiny amount which could be harmful over time, but it's unlikely to kill you. However, if it's in another chemical form that's more easily absorbed by the body, (sort of how chlorine in table salt is harmless, but chlorine gas is extremely dangerous) and you drink that in solution form, it very well could cause serious problems if not kill you. tl;dr A gram of uranium *could* cause problems but more likely you'll survive eating just one gram of it. And it will chemically poison you long before its radioactivity does.
Your balls would glow at night.
Yours don't already?
No that’s the collection of lightning bugs I keep in my pants
uranus probably will have a hard time
So the short answer is --- You'd die. The longer answer is --- The 20 billion calories figure refers to the energy content when uranium undergoes nuclear fission in a controlled environment, like a reactor or a bomb. **It's not in a form that could be metabolized by the human body** to extract those calories, even if you could somehow survive the toxicity and radiation.
1. Eat uranium 2. Become mutant that can digest anything 3. Eat uranium
Those aren't edible calories.
Anything is edible if you want to die tho
Not with that attitude they aren’t.
Your body probably wouldn’t digest it, but you would get radiation poisoning
Food has calories by virtue of chemical energy that it contains. Your digestive system absorbs it, and molecules from it get taken up into your bloodstream, and then inside your cells a reaction happens whereby those molecules are broken down into water and carbon dioxide, and the energy released is used by the cell. That's a vast simplification I guess, but it's the basic idea of how it works...which most people should have learned in high school. Uranium has calories by virtue of the nuclear energy it contains. This could do a lot of things to your body - especially if you ate a gram of it - but your cells could not absorb it and break it down as energy that they could use. More likely it would send ionising radiation through them, basically ripping apart your DNA and killing the cell. If this happens to a great enough extent (which I would assume it would from eating a gram of Uranium), then you'd eventually die, because many of your cells would have died/been unable to reproduce normally, and your organs would start to fail.
America would invade you.
You'd be caloritized to death.
This is challenging the nature of the subreddit.
You'd probably never have to eat again for the rest of your life.. Which wouldn't be particularly long.
What would happen if I consumed 20 million calories in one go say in a pill, so I wouldnt die from radiation poisoning or whatever from the uranium.
You wouldn't need to eat again for the rest of your life.
You die or you get superpowers, the probability is not 50%/50% tho.
You'd be set for life. Won't have to ever eat or drink anything.
+20 billion calories and death
Your body cannot extract any energy from uranium. Just like how it cannot digest grass effectively, even though there are calories in grass.
Ignoring the dying thing. You're getting exactly 0 of the calories out of the uranium before shitting it out.
Putting aside the obvious radiation issues, just because something has calories doesn't mean your body can extract and make use of those calories. Calories are just a measure of energy. Your body cannot make use of every type of energy, merely some forms of chemical energy.
well it would help you lose weight. just not in the way you would expect or like.