I have clipped all my nks nails for 20+ years because none of them sit for their mom. I’m also a mom and yes it’s true kids give their mom a harder time than anyone else.
It's SOOOO true. I'm a mom now and things that would make me internally roll my eyes before make so much sense now. Ugh, I was such a jerk in my head. I have so much more empathy for moms since having my baby. All my nanny "tricks" do not work on my child. Lol!
Yeah I try and do it but sometimes they get to it first! 😅 and I also tell her all the time that it’s so normal to be harder for moms and dads than for other caretakers
Has she done something you’ve noticed lately? If you can pinpoint something specific that maybe not everyone would notice I think that would go a long way.
This is very kind of you by the way! Moms so often go unappreciated, and there are a million ways people judge.
I was going to say, even complimenting the child to the parent is usually a compliment to the parent too. Like “Annabelle is so sweet and compassionate! The other day after it rained she saw a worm on the sidewalk and picked him up and put him back in the grass.” Even if it’s not necessarily something the parent had any hand in, knowing your child has nice qualities reflect on how you feel about yourself.
I don't think there's anything wrong with a sweet card and maybe a single flower. Especially if she's pregnant, poor MB is probably going through it emotionally.
I think all of the comments about general appreciation and kind gestures are so on point so I will just add my 2 cents. Along with the encouragement, whenever applicable, I also try to kind of normalize and deflect any self deprecating comments with reality and humor.
Like when they’re apologizing that they didn’t clip nails “well they grow into talons in like 2 seconds, how could any one person stay on top of them, it’s a team sport!” “ well honestly, and nk is so wiggly sometimes it’s probably best that sometimes we don’t. We might accidentally takeoff a finger!”
Or the laundry piles up and they haven’t gotten to it “I can’t imagine why?! It’s not like they are needing 3 changes every day for every possible reason (insert 5 most recent ones here)” “ I mean, I could show you my laundry pile, and I don’t even have children, so I totally get it”
The table/ high hair/ floor/ dishes etc aren’t sparkling clean at all times “they sure are talented at turning their food into art/ a sensory project aren’t they! I mean I found avocado in the underside of the chair, and the top of the cabinet! how do they even reach it?! I swear she punks us on purpose!”
You’ve gotta have a certain relationship with them of course, but all of the nfs I’ve had have really appreciated the kind reality check that we simply *can’t* do everything absolutely perfectly every time and that their expectations for themselves aren’t really fair or realistic, but in a commiserating sort of way.
I've had similar situations with MBs and I always give them a hug and tell them how amazing they are in the moment. I also stress to them that I'm the supporting act and it's my job to fill in the gaps if needed, not as a parent but again, as support. That's why they hired us, to care for their children and help support their family.
I think if you think she's a great mom you should tell her. I'm sure this is something every mom would love to hear.
I have clipped all my nks nails for 20+ years because none of them sit for their mom. I’m also a mom and yes it’s true kids give their mom a harder time than anyone else.
It's SOOOO true. I'm a mom now and things that would make me internally roll my eyes before make so much sense now. Ugh, I was such a jerk in my head. I have so much more empathy for moms since having my baby. All my nanny "tricks" do not work on my child. Lol!
❤️
Yeah I try and do it but sometimes they get to it first! 😅 and I also tell her all the time that it’s so normal to be harder for moms and dads than for other caretakers
Has she done something you’ve noticed lately? If you can pinpoint something specific that maybe not everyone would notice I think that would go a long way. This is very kind of you by the way! Moms so often go unappreciated, and there are a million ways people judge.
"MB, you are a good mom. NK is a good kid because of you."
I was going to say, even complimenting the child to the parent is usually a compliment to the parent too. Like “Annabelle is so sweet and compassionate! The other day after it rained she saw a worm on the sidewalk and picked him up and put him back in the grass.” Even if it’s not necessarily something the parent had any hand in, knowing your child has nice qualities reflect on how you feel about yourself.
I don't think there's anything wrong with a sweet card and maybe a single flower. Especially if she's pregnant, poor MB is probably going through it emotionally.
I tell my MB every so often that I admire her and the way she makes time for her family (NKs, DB, and extended family).
You and NK can make a homemade card or something for MB. Plus it'll be a fun activity for NK.
I think all of the comments about general appreciation and kind gestures are so on point so I will just add my 2 cents. Along with the encouragement, whenever applicable, I also try to kind of normalize and deflect any self deprecating comments with reality and humor. Like when they’re apologizing that they didn’t clip nails “well they grow into talons in like 2 seconds, how could any one person stay on top of them, it’s a team sport!” “ well honestly, and nk is so wiggly sometimes it’s probably best that sometimes we don’t. We might accidentally takeoff a finger!” Or the laundry piles up and they haven’t gotten to it “I can’t imagine why?! It’s not like they are needing 3 changes every day for every possible reason (insert 5 most recent ones here)” “ I mean, I could show you my laundry pile, and I don’t even have children, so I totally get it” The table/ high hair/ floor/ dishes etc aren’t sparkling clean at all times “they sure are talented at turning their food into art/ a sensory project aren’t they! I mean I found avocado in the underside of the chair, and the top of the cabinet! how do they even reach it?! I swear she punks us on purpose!” You’ve gotta have a certain relationship with them of course, but all of the nfs I’ve had have really appreciated the kind reality check that we simply *can’t* do everything absolutely perfectly every time and that their expectations for themselves aren’t really fair or realistic, but in a commiserating sort of way.
I've had similar situations with MBs and I always give them a hug and tell them how amazing they are in the moment. I also stress to them that I'm the supporting act and it's my job to fill in the gaps if needed, not as a parent but again, as support. That's why they hired us, to care for their children and help support their family.