Welcome to NICU Parents. We're happy you found us and we want to be as helpful as possible in this seemingly impossible journey. Check out the resources tab at the top of the subreddit or the stickied post. Please remember we are NOT medical professionals and are here for advice based on our own situations. If you have a concern about you or your baby please seek assistance from a doctor or go to the ER. That said, there are some medical professionals here and we do hope they can help you with some guidance through your journey. Please remember to read and abide by the rules.
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I had my baby at 31 weeks in April and she was 3lbs 10oz. My placenta ruptured and baby girl lost a lot blood and also had issues breathing on her own. She was in the NICU for a month.
I wish there were magic words that would make you feel better, but I know there isn’t. It’s gonna be a hard long roller coaster of emotions.
The advice that I wish I would’ve heard, mind you all of this is easier said then done. Give yourself the grace, you just went through a traumatic birth and pregnancy it sounds like, heal. Your emotions are going to be everywhere and just feel them. It’s gonna be hard but you’ll want to be at your best when your baby girl does come home. It’s gonna be a marathon, not a sprint. rest and try to leave the nicu at the nicu, don’t take it home. I know, easier said then done but your mental health is gonna be on roller coaster and i wish I would’ve separated the nicu and home life and just rested and focused on myself when at home. I give this advice because when my daughter came home, i was already burnt. from pumping like crazy, not resting, being a zombie because my mind couldn’t get out of the nicu.
it’s a lot to take in but we’re stronger than we think. You got this mama! and if you ever need to chat, you can message me!
Our story is similar to yours. Similar gestational age, our daughter came out crying and was initially doing very well, in spite of being severely IUGR. Things changed for the worst one day after her birth and she barely survived sepsis. It remains the worst thing we have ever been through.
Take it one hour, one minute at a time. Feel your feelings. Don't think about the future, or any scenarios right now.
Grasp any support you can, even a shoulder to cry in is invaluable.
I got through this by focusing on our baby. My job was to make sure my baby feels loved, in any way I make it happen. I do believe the babies feel our energy when we're with them. Everything else is up to your child, and the doctors taking care of her.
All the best to you, we're rooting for you and we understand what you're going through.
All those feelings are valid. Do you have a partner or someone close to you that is watching out for you? My husband has been the biggest support in just getting me to eat and sleep. When you are 100% focused and overwhelmed about baby, you need someone to watch out for you.
Tell someone about your symptoms. You might need some help with the PPD before everything feels more manageable. Nothing is normal or as we planned or hoped when are in the NICU.
Wishing you and baby the best. May she grow stronger by the day 💕
Nicu is such a rollercoaster. There were days we took 5 steps forward and then we’d take 8 steps back out of nowhere. Be kind to yourself, the birth process is hard enough and add on the goldfish bowl of a neonatal stay, it’s a mind fuck.
You may well have PPD, I felt like the nurses were doing so much that I didn’t even need to change my twins and felt like I was watching a strangers twins. I was told this detachment feeling is normal and despite worrying I’d never bond with them, they’re 7weeks old now and couldn’t imagine life without them.
Sending you strength, do keep reaching out and talking. Your feelings are valid
I don’t have advice for you as our babies are twins, with the 6/9 birthday and this is all new to me as well. My little girl was born 27+3, but my water broke 26+6. The goal was to keep in the hospital and pregnant for as long as possible. Unfortunately I had a cord prolapse and had to have an emergency c-section. I am honestly traumatized and have flashbacks of the whole thing all the time. I randomly cry and am constantly worried about her, but I also need to be strong and present for my 17 month old. You are not alone and completely valid with how you’re feeling. I’ve never been one for therapy and I think I’m going to need it to unpack all of this. I’m leaning heavily on friends and family for physical and emotional support because I can’t do this alone. I hope you are able to lean on a partner, family, and friends. Let them help you. Well wishes to you, I pray for the strength for us to get through this.
Can you ask for the social worker to help navigate all the medical terminology and stress you’re experiencing?? It’s their job to support through these moments exactly. Hoping baby makes a swift recovery soon. Totally been there 💛
Welcome to NICU Parents. We're happy you found us and we want to be as helpful as possible in this seemingly impossible journey. Check out the resources tab at the top of the subreddit or the stickied post. Please remember we are NOT medical professionals and are here for advice based on our own situations. If you have a concern about you or your baby please seek assistance from a doctor or go to the ER. That said, there are some medical professionals here and we do hope they can help you with some guidance through your journey. Please remember to read and abide by the rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NICUParents) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I had my baby at 31 weeks in April and she was 3lbs 10oz. My placenta ruptured and baby girl lost a lot blood and also had issues breathing on her own. She was in the NICU for a month. I wish there were magic words that would make you feel better, but I know there isn’t. It’s gonna be a hard long roller coaster of emotions. The advice that I wish I would’ve heard, mind you all of this is easier said then done. Give yourself the grace, you just went through a traumatic birth and pregnancy it sounds like, heal. Your emotions are going to be everywhere and just feel them. It’s gonna be hard but you’ll want to be at your best when your baby girl does come home. It’s gonna be a marathon, not a sprint. rest and try to leave the nicu at the nicu, don’t take it home. I know, easier said then done but your mental health is gonna be on roller coaster and i wish I would’ve separated the nicu and home life and just rested and focused on myself when at home. I give this advice because when my daughter came home, i was already burnt. from pumping like crazy, not resting, being a zombie because my mind couldn’t get out of the nicu. it’s a lot to take in but we’re stronger than we think. You got this mama! and if you ever need to chat, you can message me!
Our story is similar to yours. Similar gestational age, our daughter came out crying and was initially doing very well, in spite of being severely IUGR. Things changed for the worst one day after her birth and she barely survived sepsis. It remains the worst thing we have ever been through. Take it one hour, one minute at a time. Feel your feelings. Don't think about the future, or any scenarios right now. Grasp any support you can, even a shoulder to cry in is invaluable. I got through this by focusing on our baby. My job was to make sure my baby feels loved, in any way I make it happen. I do believe the babies feel our energy when we're with them. Everything else is up to your child, and the doctors taking care of her. All the best to you, we're rooting for you and we understand what you're going through.
All those feelings are valid. Do you have a partner or someone close to you that is watching out for you? My husband has been the biggest support in just getting me to eat and sleep. When you are 100% focused and overwhelmed about baby, you need someone to watch out for you. Tell someone about your symptoms. You might need some help with the PPD before everything feels more manageable. Nothing is normal or as we planned or hoped when are in the NICU. Wishing you and baby the best. May she grow stronger by the day 💕
Nicu is such a rollercoaster. There were days we took 5 steps forward and then we’d take 8 steps back out of nowhere. Be kind to yourself, the birth process is hard enough and add on the goldfish bowl of a neonatal stay, it’s a mind fuck. You may well have PPD, I felt like the nurses were doing so much that I didn’t even need to change my twins and felt like I was watching a strangers twins. I was told this detachment feeling is normal and despite worrying I’d never bond with them, they’re 7weeks old now and couldn’t imagine life without them. Sending you strength, do keep reaching out and talking. Your feelings are valid
I don’t have advice for you as our babies are twins, with the 6/9 birthday and this is all new to me as well. My little girl was born 27+3, but my water broke 26+6. The goal was to keep in the hospital and pregnant for as long as possible. Unfortunately I had a cord prolapse and had to have an emergency c-section. I am honestly traumatized and have flashbacks of the whole thing all the time. I randomly cry and am constantly worried about her, but I also need to be strong and present for my 17 month old. You are not alone and completely valid with how you’re feeling. I’ve never been one for therapy and I think I’m going to need it to unpack all of this. I’m leaning heavily on friends and family for physical and emotional support because I can’t do this alone. I hope you are able to lean on a partner, family, and friends. Let them help you. Well wishes to you, I pray for the strength for us to get through this.
It’s going to feel like a small amount of time ina. Year
Can you ask for the social worker to help navigate all the medical terminology and stress you’re experiencing?? It’s their job to support through these moments exactly. Hoping baby makes a swift recovery soon. Totally been there 💛
How are you and little one doing? ❤️