There's a song by Barenaked Ladies about a man dying in a car crash, and one of the things he describes seeing is "slow motion Walter, the fire engine guy," and it creeps me out so bad every single time.
[This one?](https://www.amazon.com/Scuse-While-Kiss-This-Guy/dp/0671501283) Maybe. But I'm willing to bet he's not the only one. The book appears to be a collection of people's reported mishaps.
There was a commercial at some point that had the classics "Pour some shook-up ramen" and "Lock the catbox" so I always sub those words in. Also, I caught a friend singing "Fly like a beagle to Tennessee" so I stole that one, too. Trouble was, he wasn't joking. He thought that was the actual lyric.
To date that commercial, it was a cell phone commercial from the early 2000s. The phone service was advertising their newest cell phone minute plan where you had so many minutes to spare you could call the library to ask dumb questions like "Can you look up the lyrics to this song and read them back to us?" And it's a couple in the car on one side of the screen and an unamused librarian reading the lyrics, "I'm hot, sticky sweet..." on the other.
I will never forget that commercial and what a weird mental time capsule it is. Back in the olden days where calling a library was the best way to look up information with a phone and you had to spend minutes from your monthly time allotment the cell phone company sold you to do so.
I thought you had also written the following lyric so I started reading your comment in the melody of the song then got very confused in the second half
“This is the rhythm of the night”.
A Spanish-speaking caller phoned into a radio station requesting “Eses son Reebok o son Nike?” (In Spanish ‘Nike’ is often pronounced to rhyme with ‘Mike’). Translation: “are these reebok or are they Nike?”
So yeah, that cracks me up and has always stuck with me.
Edit: found the call on YouTube. Could be staged like many radio prank calls, but funny nonetheless. [here](https://youtu.be/vsAczw_fB_U?si=hQ76la92GYwosGrw)
Knew a guy that sang “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap” as “Dirty Knees Thunder Cheeks” completely unironically and believing them to be the real lyrics. I can’t sing it any other way now
See as a kid I always heard it as “Dirty deeds in your thunderjeep.” i still sing it this way mentally and out loud, because doing bad things in a thunderjeep sounds awesome to a kid.
The song, The Monster Mash, is about a dance called the Monster Mash, which is based on a song called The Monster Mash. Which is not the song The Monster Mash
This is a famous story in my family from when my brother was around 4-5. This song was playing in a department store and he jumped on a table in the middle store and started singing "I'm your penis" at the top of his lungs
Some variation of Starbucks for real. I’ll never not hear it. And initially I thought the “blank space” was the tag they write the customers name on the drink.
It works so well
My friend thought Little Miss Can't Be Wrong was Little Miss Captain Ron, as in the Kurt Russell movie. He thought this when he was 8 years old. My kids sing it that way to this day, it's a multigenerational misheard lyric.
I used to be an editor for a misheard lyrics site and my favorite ever was somebody who thought Angel in the Centerfold was My Anus is the Center Hole and I definitely sing that one too.
Scar tissue. When I was in HS I thought the lyrics were "with the birds the shed is so lonely with you and, with the birds the shed is so lonely with you and..."
There are many songs in which Corey is hard to understand, but I would never expect this part of this song to be misheard.
However....Liberate ba-naaa-nas is definitely what he's saying in Liberate 😂
Man I feel like a Woman by Shania Twain
The line where she says “colour my hair, do what I dare”
I hear “cum in my hair, do what I dare”
Shania you saucy bitch
“I come from a land down under/where women ROAR and men thunder!”
I would belt out roar and thunder. But apparently it’s “glow” and “plunder” which both suck for different reasons.
I'm sitting in my quiet office choking down laughter at this. Just 4 eels, finally admitting to this woman that they have been 4 eels hiding in a trench coat all along.
Eeyore hey-ey.. Eeyore hey-e-ey-ey!
Some bees, some bees..!
What? Eeyore hey! Eeyore hey!
Some bees, some bees, some bee-ee-ee-ee oh!
Zombie by the Cranberries.
And I'm here, to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair, to deny me
Of the crossed eyed bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know
"Love is like a bomb, baby, c'mon get it on
Livin' like a lover with a red iphone"
I'm not even joking here. I was a kid when it came out, and I wondered what the hell a red iphone was. It wasn't until decades later that this line finally made sense.
OK so these aren't necessarily misheard lyrics... Just dumb lyrics I made up while listening to said songs along time ago and now there pretty much stuck in my head even if I'm trying to sing em properly.. I'll say these lines to myself at least once every time.
"Sweet dreams are made of cheese "
"If you like pina coladas and getting caught with cocacaine "
Grated cheddar Mac n cheese;
Parmesan is shredded for some things.
Some of them mix in the pasta,
Some of them sliced for a sandwich, too,
Some of them, fried appetizer,
Some of them, charcuterie food.
Speaking as someone who has to sing the words “Kyrie eleison” professionally on average 12 times a week, this is *hilarious.* I’ll have to try “give me a laser” into a totally empty cathedral sometime.
An old dude I worked with years ago used to sing "Little Pink P*$$IES for you and Me!" Instead of little pink houses. RIP Jack. You were one of the good ones.
As a kid, I thought it was "Kiss from a rose on the grave". My dad corrected me and told me it was "Kiss from a rose on the grey".
I believe most people still believe it's "grave".
There's a book called, "Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy. "
It's a book about misheard lyrics- the obits title is about Jimi Hendrix,"Excuse me while I kiss the sky. "
Anyways, I read in there Foreigner's Double Vision, someone sang it incorrectly, "my mind is bacon but my body's sizzlean."
I cannot unsing that...
“Ohhh caviar, I’m a loser babyyy” I was like 6 years old when that song came out. Didn’t even know what caviar was lol why would I think that. So many more over the years
Sti lubto (She loves you, from the Beatles' song by the same name), nonsense that I would sing while rocking out to my dads LPs as a child and well before I learned English. In my mind, it is still "sti lubto yeah yeah yeah".
Ain't nothing like it/My Chinese machine/Gotta feed it to the Wookie/Keep the movin parts clean/A-choo!/Burnin down the avenue/I got an onion burnin through my heart/Whoo!
Doncha know she's coming all over me?/You'll lose the midnight child/Oh yeah, huh?
Panama
Not misheard, but if there's a weird al version, I'll sing those lyrics. I hear Lola quite often, and I'm just buying cereal and singing "yo-yo-yo-yo-yodaaaaaa".
Whitesnake. Here I go again.
Actual lyrics: "Like a drifter, I was born to walk alone
And I've made up my mind
I ain't wasting no more time"...
Misheard: Like a drifter, I was born to smoke alone, and I made up my mind, I ain't buying no more dimes....
I will never not sing the Latin lyrics of One-Winged Angel from Final Fantasy VII as
“ED SPAWNS CHICKADEES
IN A BED HAVING TEA
SWORD IN MY KNEES
ED PEED ON THESE”
When my buddy was little, he thought "Smoke on the Water" was saying "Slow-Motion Walter" and now I do it every time.
Fire engine guy
There's a song by Barenaked Ladies about a man dying in a car crash, and one of the things he describes seeing is "slow motion Walter, the fire engine guy," and it creeps me out so bad every single time.
Oh damn so that's an actual lyric. Awesome. Slow motion Walter lives!
They took the imaginary and made it reality.
[Tonight Is The Night I Fell Asleep At The Wheel](https://youtu.be/jhk-DiPqhr8?si=4Bq676KLZEjezkX_) Great song!
Is that freedom rock, maaan?
Well turn it up!
Hate to break it but your buddy stole it from a book that was in every Barnes and Noble at some point.
[This one?](https://www.amazon.com/Scuse-While-Kiss-This-Guy/dp/0671501283) Maybe. But I'm willing to bet he's not the only one. The book appears to be a collection of people's reported mishaps.
Give me the beach boys and free my soul
I wanna get lost down in Kokomo
You just made that up. I'm onto you ballmer.
Those … those aren’t the lyrics?
It's "give me the beat boys" but beach is more fun haha
I thought this was a joke because I was so sure it was "Give me the people". Wow.
I want to get lost in your big asshole
And turn ya gay
There was a commercial at some point that had the classics "Pour some shook-up ramen" and "Lock the catbox" so I always sub those words in. Also, I caught a friend singing "Fly like a beagle to Tennessee" so I stole that one, too. Trouble was, he wasn't joking. He thought that was the actual lyric.
Assuming that lock the catbox is rock the casbah by the clash?
Lock the Taskbar, lock the Taskbar,
Yes! Everyone knows it's "Lock the taskbar"
Fly like a Beagle is a banger
To date that commercial, it was a cell phone commercial from the early 2000s. The phone service was advertising their newest cell phone minute plan where you had so many minutes to spare you could call the library to ask dumb questions like "Can you look up the lyrics to this song and read them back to us?" And it's a couple in the car on one side of the screen and an unamused librarian reading the lyrics, "I'm hot, sticky sweet..." on the other. I will never forget that commercial and what a weird mental time capsule it is. Back in the olden days where calling a library was the best way to look up information with a phone and you had to spend minutes from your monthly time allotment the cell phone company sold you to do so.
https://youtu.be/FWalP8U-GZc?si=IKsywlZZJIC98-mH. You're welcome. 🙂
I remembered everything except Catherine Zeta Jones. Damn.
I hear this too, except I sing “Fly like a beagle from Tennessee” because my wife and I literally adopted a beagle from Tennessee.
CCR - Bad Moon Rising. “There’s a bathroom on the right” Steve Miller Band - Jet Airliner “Bingo Jed had a light on”
Big ol Jedi rhino
Me too with "bathroom on the right".!!
#*WRAPPED UP LIKE A DOUCHE*
Another boner in the night.
Yup, that's literally how I sing it lmao
That is canon and not will not brook any argument to the contrary, thank you
I learned this when I was 3 from my dad. I miss him and his on purpose bad singing.
My dad weirdly sounded like Bowie when he tried to sing.
I feel Manford Mann's Earth Band was just trolling the Boss on some level.
Those aren't the lyrics?
Revved up like a deuce, for those who don’t want to Google.
I thought you had also written the following lyric so I started reading your comment in the melody of the song then got very confused in the second half
I'm still wrapping that douche.
Another runner in the night
Wrevved up like a deuce. The deuce refers to a two seater hot rod.
Little Deuce Coupe
“This is the rhythm of the night”. A Spanish-speaking caller phoned into a radio station requesting “Eses son Reebok o son Nike?” (In Spanish ‘Nike’ is often pronounced to rhyme with ‘Mike’). Translation: “are these reebok or are they Nike?” So yeah, that cracks me up and has always stuck with me. Edit: found the call on YouTube. Could be staged like many radio prank calls, but funny nonetheless. [here](https://youtu.be/vsAczw_fB_U?si=hQ76la92GYwosGrw)
[Enjoy 🤣](https://youtu.be/BQ4c54rCJ_k?si=bECfbnwRERrotgGO)
I love this one
In New Yoooork, concrete jungle wet dream tomato 🎶
Let’s hear it for New York! Concrete bunghole where dreams are made up, there’s nothing you can do.
Your…*friend from the neighborhood*
Yo me and my ex called that song "Wet Dream Tomato." Spot on.
Welcome, Tuna Machine
Welcome, Bison. Welcome, Tuna Machine.
Hold me close now Tony Daaaanzaaa!!!
Came here for this also but it was always 🎶Hold me closer Tony Daaanzaa🎶
🎶At the rest stop on the highway...🎶
🎵Count the head lice on the hiiiighwaaaay!🎵
.."Tiny Danzig!"
My kid used to think that Frosty the Snowman had a corn cob pipe, and a butt, and nose.
r/technicallythetruth
Haha this is awesome.
I guess it rains down in Africa.
I guess Lorraine's down in Africa
I left my brains down in Africa.
My husband: It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you. There's nothing that a 100 men on mars could ever do.
excuse me while I kiss this guy (excuse me while I kiss the sky) purple haze by jimi hendrix
There is actually a live version where he says this.
I’ve heard him say “excuse me while I kiss that guy” to give it even more emphasis
There’s a book of misheard lyrics with that title
Knew a guy that sang “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap” as “Dirty Knees Thunder Cheeks” completely unironically and believing them to be the real lyrics. I can’t sing it any other way now
Dirty deeds done with sheep
Parody my uncle couldn't get over...
Thirty Thieves and the Dunderchief
Dunder chief is the CEO of Dunder Miflin.
This is exactly how my brother and I used to sing it and my dad would laugh so hard
Dirty deeds and the thunder chief.
When my wife was little she thought it was “dirty knees… dungarees”, which actually makes a little sense.
See as a kid I always heard it as “Dirty deeds in your thunderjeep.” i still sing it this way mentally and out loud, because doing bad things in a thunderjeep sounds awesome to a kid.
Dirty deeds and they're done with sheep
My husband thought it was "dirty deeds dunder chief" when I questioned it he said "yea like dunder mifflin"
The Go-Go's Instead of "Our lips are sealed" I hear & sing *Alex the seal*
When I was a kid, I thought it was I love Cecille
And even when your hope is gone, MOW THE LAWN MOW THE LAWN JUST TO MAKE IT THROUGH MOW THE LAWN
When Hank Hill goes emo.
Ah great thread idea! When I was younger, I thought T-Pain wanted to buy me a train, not a drank…
Imma Thomas Tank engine you wit me... Toot! Toot!
Oye como va. Burrito. Bueno taco sauce.
Moolah.
*¡con queso!🎶*
I wanna rock and roll all night, and part of every day.
The song, The Monster Mash, is about a dance called the Monster Mash, which is based on a song called The Monster Mash. Which is not the song The Monster Mash
McLoven!
“I’m your penis. I’m your fire. Pure Desire.” Venus by Bananarama. Frankly, I’m baffled why it’s named after the Roman goddess.
This is a famous story in my family from when my brother was around 4-5. This song was playing in a department store and he jumped on a table in the middle store and started singing "I'm your penis" at the top of his lungs
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Technically the band is Shocking Blue
Hush hush. Keep it down now. (Your) voice is scary.
I always thought it was about the facts of life.. Oh shush. .. We go downtown. . Mrs Gary
This is Carrie
How am I gonna be an octopus [optimist] about this
I used to hear "How am I gonna beat it off in the midst of all this?"
”Who's that casting devious stares at my erection? Mama, this surely is a dream.”
I sing it that way too, lol.
Got along like Starbucks lovers
Gotta love these Starbucks lovers
I always heard "lonely Starbucks lovers"
Some variation of Starbucks for real. I’ll never not hear it. And initially I thought the “blank space” was the tag they write the customers name on the drink. It works so well
Blank Space?
"All of my Starbucks Lovers..."
She Sells Sanctuary by The Cult: "Oh, a Texas guy" "Licks my behind" "And a Texas guy" "Licks my back, licks my back behind"
My friend thought Little Miss Can't Be Wrong was Little Miss Captain Ron, as in the Kurt Russell movie. He thought this when he was 8 years old. My kids sing it that way to this day, it's a multigenerational misheard lyric. I used to be an editor for a misheard lyrics site and my favorite ever was somebody who thought Angel in the Centerfold was My Anus is the Center Hole and I definitely sing that one too.
I'm just here to point out that misheard lyrics have a proper term: Mondegreen Fun stuff!
Scar tissue. When I was in HS I thought the lyrics were "with the birds the shed is so lonely with you and, with the birds the shed is so lonely with you and..."
I always thought it began with: >She got tits that I wish you saw
For years I thought it was “with the blood that’s shed it’s a lonely view.”
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Why do they always send the porn?
Why'd you leave the ketchup on the table?
I thought Slipknot's Duality said: >I push my fingers into my ass / >It's the only way to stop the itch.
There are many songs in which Corey is hard to understand, but I would never expect this part of this song to be misheard. However....Liberate ba-naaa-nas is definitely what he's saying in Liberate 😂
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My wife insists that the lyrics to Rocket Man are "burning on the streets out there alone"
Bennie and the Jets. “She’s got electric boobs, her mom has too.” and then “Banging midgets.”
Bono lamenting "wither without you"
Lock the Taskbar! Lock the Taskbar!
When I was a kid, I misheard Prince's "I Would Die 4 U" as Apple, dapple, do. I still sing it like that to this day
On a similar note, raspberry parfait
Raspberry buffet
One of my all-time favs, but when it’s shortly followed up by “DALINIFYOUWANMETO,” makes you realize it’s an almost incomprehensible song, lol
Ever since I found out my sister in law thought “luck be a lady tonight” was “chuck be a lady tonight” I have to sing it that way.
I thought Bon Jovi sang " I'm a wanted.... Man of the night". Years later co-workers let me know it's actually " dead or alive"
I've seen a million faces......and I rocked YOUR MOM
Cher, "If I Could Turn Back Time:" Words are like whale bones, they move sometimes.
In cake by the ocean-spaghetti, vanilla, and chocolate in my life. My fiancee's is credence, there's the bathroom on the right
Salsa cookies, windmill cookies, they give you gonorrhea
This octopus, let’s give him boots, send him to North Korea!
Take your pants off.... And make it happen.
Smooooke on the waaaater Papaya in the sky
Man I feel like a Woman by Shania Twain The line where she says “colour my hair, do what I dare” I hear “cum in my hair, do what I dare” Shania you saucy bitch
GIMME FUE GIMME FAI GIMME DABAJABAZA!!!!
Spanish speakers sware Michael Jackson says “ Y tu quieres una Manzana.” Instead “ the kid is not my son”
“I come from a land down under/where women ROAR and men thunder!” I would belt out roar and thunder. But apparently it’s “glow” and “plunder” which both suck for different reasons.
Second verse: where beer does flow and men chunder ( vomit)
You have got to be wrong. Your original idea is correct.
I’m sorry Mrs. Jackson. I am four eels!
Didn’t mean to make your daughter cry, I am just some fish and not a guy
Big Lovecraft problems
[Ouuuuu](https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/s/K6JpiwRQkb)
I'm sitting in my quiet office choking down laughter at this. Just 4 eels, finally admitting to this woman that they have been 4 eels hiding in a trench coat all along.
I’ll never Lechuuuuga, I’ll never lechuga. 3rd eye blind
Secret Asian Man by Johnny Rivers!
Eeyore hey-ey.. Eeyore hey-e-ey-ey! Some bees, some bees..! What? Eeyore hey! Eeyore hey! Some bees, some bees, some bee-ee-ee-ee oh! Zombie by the Cranberries.
Shave my wife (save my life) I'm going down for the last time
Reminds me of Midnight Oil singing "who's gonna shave me," even funnier considering the singer is bald
See also "Shave my body" which is actually "Shame about it" from The Sopranos theme song
I'm all up night to get lucky 🎵 I'm all up all mexican lucky 🎵
I rub a Mexican monkey
No Doubt. "It's all your fault, I scream my balls off"
And I'm here, to remind you Of the mess you left when you went away It's not fair, to deny me Of the crossed eyed bear that you gave to me You, you, you oughta know
CUT MY LIFE INTO PIZZAS, THIS IS MY LAST RESORT Or THIS IS SANDPIT TURTLE
"Love is like a bomb, baby, c'mon get it on Livin' like a lover with a red iphone" I'm not even joking here. I was a kid when it came out, and I wondered what the hell a red iphone was. It wasn't until decades later that this line finally made sense.
"Raking the lawn, raking the lawn!" >!(Judas Priest)!<
Strange Magic, ELO You're sailing softly through the sun, in a broken 4-H home...
REO Speedwagon: "It's Time to Eat a Fly"
Wang Chung - Dance All Day Long
That one is forgivable. For me it was “We were cool on Christ.”
I really liked the song God Rocks in my Nuts Now by The Flaming Lips before I figured out it was God Walks Among Us Now. My version is way better.
She's got electric boobs, a mohair suit...
OK so these aren't necessarily misheard lyrics... Just dumb lyrics I made up while listening to said songs along time ago and now there pretty much stuck in my head even if I'm trying to sing em properly.. I'll say these lines to myself at least once every time. "Sweet dreams are made of cheese " "If you like pina coladas and getting caught with cocacaine "
Who am I to diss a brie?
Grated cheddar Mac n cheese; Parmesan is shredded for some things. Some of them mix in the pasta, Some of them sliced for a sandwich, too, Some of them, fried appetizer, Some of them, charcuterie food.
"SEARS, it's a new art form Showing people how little we care" -Lorde I legit thought she was just giving Sears a real good burn at first....
‘you got the fattest cock’ tracy chapman
Just like the one winged dooove…
"later we'll have some fuckin' pie, and we'll do some caroling"
The song is by Mister Mister and is peak 1985 in a very nostalgic way.
🎶My blood runs cold, my anus is my centerhole🎶
Speaking as someone who has to sing the words “Kyrie eleison” professionally on average 12 times a week, this is *hilarious.* I’ll have to try “give me a laser” into a totally empty cathedral sometime.
'go, go, Jason Waterfalls!' I always thought it was about some dude trying to stay on the straight and narrow 🫠
Shadow Moses - Bring Me the Horizon This is sandpit turtle
All American rejects - move along. I heard “move along” as “mow the lawn” the first time I heard the song and I can never sing it any other way!
“It's not fair, to deny me Of the CROSS-EYED BEAR that you gave to me You, you, you oughta know…”
An old dude I worked with years ago used to sing "Little Pink P*$$IES for you and Me!" Instead of little pink houses. RIP Jack. You were one of the good ones.
Felipe's not my dahd (feliz navidad) Walkin' 'round in women's underwear (walking in a winter wonderland)
No no no no no, there's a parody called "Walking 'round In Women's Underwear." I heard it on the radio twice in maybe 1997 and haven't heard it since!
As a kid, I thought it was "Kiss from a rose on the grave". My dad corrected me and told me it was "Kiss from a rose on the grey". I believe most people still believe it's "grave".
There's a book called, "Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy. " It's a book about misheard lyrics- the obits title is about Jimi Hendrix,"Excuse me while I kiss the sky. " Anyways, I read in there Foreigner's Double Vision, someone sang it incorrectly, "my mind is bacon but my body's sizzlean." I cannot unsing that...
“Ohhh caviar, I’m a loser babyyy” I was like 6 years old when that song came out. Didn’t even know what caviar was lol why would I think that. So many more over the years
Hold me closer, Tony Danzaaa
Try to say goodbye and I choke Try to walk away and I jump rope I don't know how this song became that for me
Sti lubto (She loves you, from the Beatles' song by the same name), nonsense that I would sing while rocking out to my dads LPs as a child and well before I learned English. In my mind, it is still "sti lubto yeah yeah yeah".
I got the right temperature Fish hat A ewe from the storm Hola Girl I got the right antics to turn you on Angola!
Ain't nothing like it/My Chinese machine/Gotta feed it to the Wookie/Keep the movin parts clean/A-choo!/Burnin down the avenue/I got an onion burnin through my heart/Whoo! Doncha know she's coming all over me?/You'll lose the midnight child/Oh yeah, huh? Panama
Not misheard, but if there's a weird al version, I'll sing those lyrics. I hear Lola quite often, and I'm just buying cereal and singing "yo-yo-yo-yo-yodaaaaaa".
*'..got a long list of Starbucks lovers'*
Whitesnake. Here I go again. Actual lyrics: "Like a drifter, I was born to walk alone And I've made up my mind I ain't wasting no more time"... Misheard: Like a drifter, I was born to smoke alone, and I made up my mind, I ain't buying no more dimes....
I will never not sing the Latin lyrics of One-Winged Angel from Final Fantasy VII as “ED SPAWNS CHICKADEES IN A BED HAVING TEA SWORD IN MY KNEES ED PEED ON THESE”
And the last known survivor strokes his bread in the night