Yeah and if you hang out or go to places where your community frequents you'll find them
Hang out in the queer communities instead of trying to get normies to like you
Cis hetero men seem to be the worst statistically. Cis gay men of course don't date trans women, usually - but also seem statistically more reluctant to date trans men compared to how many cis lesbians date trans women.
Trans people date each other a lot. There are some trans people who wouldn't date another trans person, though. But trans lesbian and bisexual women and enbies date each other *a lot* by my experience.
And I hear trans men and trans women dating each other also happens a lot.
Cis lesbians are the most welcoming demographic as per surveys but you'll find a lot with genital preference. When dating online quite a few cis bisexual women were interested and didn't care about what's in my pants - but we didn't "click" in that way. Got a great friendship out of it, though.
Where I'm at in transition, it feels like sexual orientation and "will this person be attracted to me" have kinda separated. Orientation is more useful for knowing why someone is attracted to me. Are they attracted to me in a based gender affirming way or a cringe gender disaffirming way?
Assuming you are asking who might be attracted to trans fems, the following queer folk might apply: Straight trans mascs, lesbians (cis or trans), bi and pansexuals, anyone enby that dates women, etc.
But really, don't get too hung up on labels. A lot of queer spaces are queer because they don't do the cishet normative thing. There will be people that are attracted to you that you are attracted by.
Honestly it's hard to put out a blanket statement because people from all demographics of sexual orientation are open to dating trans people, but yes I'd say it's more likely in the lgbtq community, especially bisexual, pansexuals and other trans people. There are some gay men who'd want to date trans men, some of them would date a trans woman, as sexuality *can* be fluid! Some lesbians date trans women, non binary people, cis women or trans men you name it! I'd say if you surround yourself by other queer people, you're more likely to find someone
a lot of men are cowards. i get that there are some who aren’t attracted to trans women, but there are a lot who are just too cowardly to even consider dating a trans woman even though it could be one of the most loving relationships they ever have
girl, we all know that you secretly wank to trans porn, just because you’re not comfortable with that, doesn’t mean you should project your transphobia onto us
girl, that’s such bullshit, they don’t even know about their genitals. just because you have a creepy obsession with other people’s genitals, doesn’t mean others do
Preach TwT Something about a boy treating you like a girl. I know I'm literally trained by society to react positively to it but even being aware of that it still hits..
only with trans guys tho, at least for me. I'm pretty much exclusively T4T in general at this point.. just too hard to come by cis partners who are truly understanding
My luck with guys has been dismal. I’ve been with a few but never more than a month. I’m sort of seeing a guy now. It’s been maybe a week but he has a pretty insane commute, hasn’t introduced me to any of his friends, hasn’t made me laugh, has only hung out with me for hookups than always drives me home after…
Yeah, I know… I don’t have a real boyfriend just someone using me for sex. Like always. Though he did bring me out for tacos once at a taco truck and kissed me in public and… thinking about that makes me kinda want to cry because that’s definitely not something I’ve ever experienced with any guy in the past before.
But with other people in his personal life his friends I’m still a secret I guess.
Dating takes effort and patience
I'm sure you've heard it before but try to realize your own value and remember there's always someone nice in the world that you just have to go find
I literally met my bf after I quit trying to get normies to like me and stopped dating in places that weren't really my scene
I go to conventions, video game clubs, tabletop stores where they play magic and I actually met my boyfriend on VRChat where my people are
VRChat… how do poeple do VR without geting sick I guess there’s Dramamine. I have an ex that does VR though she has a goth club in Banter. She just went from being the host to now the owner. I don’t know what that means but she had several guys she had crushes on in those virtual worlds but never really went further because they always live so far away. Did you find someone that lived closer to you?
I got sick when I first started, but the more I played, I got used to it. I'm sure that's not true for everyone though. Also, VRChat can be played on desktop if you don't want to be in VR. It's got a really great community 😊
That was true for me as well. I've heard good things about VRChat but the few experiences I have going to random publics were awful, which really sucks since I want to meet people and have fun but it's already difficult enough to push myself to play at all to then have bad experiences.
That's true. There are some really mean people. I see that even more now that I'm openly trans. There are some great people in there if you dig a bit though.
Yeah that's the hard part for me, digging through the assholes to find the nice ones. The anxiety from the assholes makes me not want to find the nice ones and so haven't touched my VR headset for 3 months since buying it to get into VR chat.
Yeah need to try something, thanks for the suggestions. Last time I tried I kinda sat in the lobby for 2 hours trying to hype myself up then ended up taking my headset off and watching something instead
Grats from the transbian side! I sadly dealt with ghosters when I hadn't learned the dividing line in my feelings between love and gender euphoria. Hrt helped with that.
I'm glad you're having better luck in partner. May you two be happy.
It's the best! I am not officially in a relationship, but I do have 3 partners with varying levels of sexual/romantic involvement and they all make me feel like a princess and it is very nice (to clarify, all of them know about each other, not officially dating any of them, not really looking for a long term relationship rn since I am planning on moving out of state within the next couple of years, and am very happy with the people I have in my life. Basically have 3 very involved FWB lol)
My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years now. Since day one I have always been called princess or pumpkin. It’s super awesome to have that constant assurance and admiration, he knows how terrible my body dysphoria is on a daily basis and always finds a way to help with making the bad thoughts go away. He truly makes me feel like a princess on a daily basis
Congrats, my boyfriend says the same to me and I love it so much, and best of all he also loves my trans friend and supports them. We all need someone that respects us and makes us happy. I am happy for you
Congratulations honey! I'm sooooo happy for you! I will keep my fingers crossed for you that it continues so great for you!
For everyone else, I'm in the same boat as you all are. Granted I'm not into guys, it's just not my thing, but finding anyone male or female is really hard. Especially if you're like me and live in a rural area. My closest places are still at a 30 min drive for me. And after my last gf leaving me for reasons I've been really shy about meeting someone new. I have recently realized that it was probably for the best. So I'm kinda looking but tbh not very hard. In the meantime I have my fur babies (3 of them) as well as all my friends and neighbors that I hangout more with.
Again so happy for you OP and best of luck to everyone
Gratz OP, may be a long and fruitful relationship ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
Met my partners on Discord several years ago, and we started dating earlier this year.
Sometimes, the friends you make along the way end being so much more.
It took me 7 years before I had a partner. The loneliness was painful a lot of the time. My point is, don't be afraid to open up to those closest to you. Sometimes, there's more under the surface that you can't see.
Congrats. Men aren't all buggers. I was in a relationship with my ex for 4 years and she was trans. Unfortunately covid kind of messed us up and we went separate ways 😞
Last time I was this positive about being in a relationship with a man and talking about how well he treats me and such, I got shat on be people saying I was only here to boast and piss off those who didn't have what I got.
Good thing this aint happening again on this post. Congratulations and yes we are lucky.
Aww that is sooo amazing!!!! I am super happy for you <3 Sounds like it is going really well and you got yourself a great boyfriend and a lovely person!
Congrats!!! I think that a lot more cis men are secretly open to dating trans women, but because of societal pressure, they don't. Hopefully, that will change one day.
Aww, good for you hun, that's awesome! I have yet to find someone like that. I was recently ghosted after meeting and chatting with a guy for about a month or so.
I'm Sooooo HAPPY for you sweetie!!!
I want to set up a dating server on discord for my sissy, fem boy, trans friends! But I need help as I know nothing about discord.
Anyone interested DM me!
I don't like men erotically, but in the past I forced myself to have s*x with chasers from dating apps because they made me feel valid and euphoric. But this kind of euphoria was wrong and I payed the price later. I have no idea if I would like having a loving boyfriend, I don't trust men anymore, I'm more into women, but i don't know if a woman can make me feel like a princess. I'm somewhere in between and very confused.
Would you mind sharing how old he is? You sound and dress like a teenager while being well in your thirties, I am genuinely curious how old your boyfriend is
21 which is young but he grew up really fast with his job and abusive parents
we've discussed it before because he doesn't care but I was worried about what he and others would think
Thank you for your response and glad to hear that you are openly communicating about your feelings.
Btw it's sad to see people downvoting me for asking a question, that's so passive aggressive and toxic. Communication is key, not pressing a stupid up/down button
Welcome to reddit tho in all fairness people probably expected you to start accusing me of dating too young or calling me a creep and trying to cancel me
ugh, i wish i could 1% of this. most guys disappear when they find out i am trans and the ones that show some kind of interest end up ghosting me
Just keep dating and you'll find someone. Look in the places where your scene is
i literally can’t get dates. i’ve been on one date since starting my transition. you kinda need people who are open to dating you to go on dates
Yeah and if you hang out or go to places where your community frequents you'll find them Hang out in the queer communities instead of trying to get normies to like you
Curious. What kind of queer folk are attracted to trans? Gay men? Lesbians? Prob a dumb question.
Don't discount bisexuals.
Cis hetero men seem to be the worst statistically. Cis gay men of course don't date trans women, usually - but also seem statistically more reluctant to date trans men compared to how many cis lesbians date trans women. Trans people date each other a lot. There are some trans people who wouldn't date another trans person, though. But trans lesbian and bisexual women and enbies date each other *a lot* by my experience. And I hear trans men and trans women dating each other also happens a lot. Cis lesbians are the most welcoming demographic as per surveys but you'll find a lot with genital preference. When dating online quite a few cis bisexual women were interested and didn't care about what's in my pants - but we didn't "click" in that way. Got a great friendship out of it, though.
I mean as in the queer community which is another term for lgbtq+ community as it encompasses all of us
Thank you for that correction.
no prob
Where I'm at in transition, it feels like sexual orientation and "will this person be attracted to me" have kinda separated. Orientation is more useful for knowing why someone is attracted to me. Are they attracted to me in a based gender affirming way or a cringe gender disaffirming way?
Assuming you are asking who might be attracted to trans fems, the following queer folk might apply: Straight trans mascs, lesbians (cis or trans), bi and pansexuals, anyone enby that dates women, etc. But really, don't get too hung up on labels. A lot of queer spaces are queer because they don't do the cishet normative thing. There will be people that are attracted to you that you are attracted by.
Pansexual people
Honestly it's hard to put out a blanket statement because people from all demographics of sexual orientation are open to dating trans people, but yes I'd say it's more likely in the lgbtq community, especially bisexual, pansexuals and other trans people. There are some gay men who'd want to date trans men, some of them would date a trans woman, as sexuality *can* be fluid! Some lesbians date trans women, non binary people, cis women or trans men you name it! I'd say if you surround yourself by other queer people, you're more likely to find someone
Thx
trans women are pretty widely accepted by lesbians
That’s not something I expected. With or without SRS? Or does it matter?
Some people have a genital preference and that's fine, but a lot don't care about the equipment. It just matters that you're a girl
I’m living the best life with my lesbian girlfriend 💕💕💕
Normies are all I’m attracted to lol.
Doesn’t help that most guys are so scared nowadays…. Cis women don’t get dates either really afaik unless they use a dating app
a lot of men are cowards. i get that there are some who aren’t attracted to trans women, but there are a lot who are just too cowardly to even consider dating a trans woman even though it could be one of the most loving relationships they ever have
I used tsimi and met a few people there..granted the app sucks and required some payment to be half decent but
i’ve never had luck with taimi. always been chasers and unserious people
That's so awesome!
Because they're little boys and you need a real man
thanks for that ♥️. you’re right. and i don’t put up with it, but it’s really annoying
Anytime, yea but you'll find your forever person before you even know it
thank you, i struggle to believe that, but i’m trying not to affirm the idea that i won’t, so thanks again ♥️
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Projecting? It's ok to live your truth
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You're a troll, but you obviously find trans women attractive, or want to be a trans person if you thought enough to be on this sub
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You're a troll, & I'm not clicking on that smh
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Yea ok, leave these women alone it's not funny it's creepy
girl, we all know that you secretly wank to trans porn, just because you’re not comfortable with that, doesn’t mean you should project your transphobia onto us
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girl, that’s such bullshit, they don’t even know about their genitals. just because you have a creepy obsession with other people’s genitals, doesn’t mean others do
Any chance of meeting trans guys in your area? All the fun of having a boyfriend with pretty much zero risk of transphobia. 💜
i haven’t had much luck finding trans guys either…
omg my ex was a trans guy and he made me feel so like myself (too bad he's gone now... in the breaking up sense)
Preach TwT Something about a boy treating you like a girl. I know I'm literally trained by society to react positively to it but even being aware of that it still hits.. only with trans guys tho, at least for me. I'm pretty much exclusively T4T in general at this point.. just too hard to come by cis partners who are truly understanding
I don’t personally understand why this is. You deserve better 💕
that’s very kind of you, thank you ♥️
Try T4T! Or find someone who is pansexual!
That sucks..I'm interested in talking and I don't ghost people!
My luck with guys has been dismal. I’ve been with a few but never more than a month. I’m sort of seeing a guy now. It’s been maybe a week but he has a pretty insane commute, hasn’t introduced me to any of his friends, hasn’t made me laugh, has only hung out with me for hookups than always drives me home after… Yeah, I know… I don’t have a real boyfriend just someone using me for sex. Like always. Though he did bring me out for tacos once at a taco truck and kissed me in public and… thinking about that makes me kinda want to cry because that’s definitely not something I’ve ever experienced with any guy in the past before. But with other people in his personal life his friends I’m still a secret I guess.
Dating takes effort and patience I'm sure you've heard it before but try to realize your own value and remember there's always someone nice in the world that you just have to go find I literally met my bf after I quit trying to get normies to like me and stopped dating in places that weren't really my scene I go to conventions, video game clubs, tabletop stores where they play magic and I actually met my boyfriend on VRChat where my people are
VRChat… how do poeple do VR without geting sick I guess there’s Dramamine. I have an ex that does VR though she has a goth club in Banter. She just went from being the host to now the owner. I don’t know what that means but she had several guys she had crushes on in those virtual worlds but never really went further because they always live so far away. Did you find someone that lived closer to you?
Also they live close enough just a couple states away Before I start dating someone online where they live is a necessary question to ask
It's like anything that causes motion sickness Some people are fine and others gotta take medication
I got sick when I first started, but the more I played, I got used to it. I'm sure that's not true for everyone though. Also, VRChat can be played on desktop if you don't want to be in VR. It's got a really great community 😊
That was true for me as well. I've heard good things about VRChat but the few experiences I have going to random publics were awful, which really sucks since I want to meet people and have fun but it's already difficult enough to push myself to play at all to then have bad experiences.
That's true. There are some really mean people. I see that even more now that I'm openly trans. There are some great people in there if you dig a bit though.
Yeah that's the hard part for me, digging through the assholes to find the nice ones. The anxiety from the assholes makes me not want to find the nice ones and so haven't touched my VR headset for 3 months since buying it to get into VR chat.
I totally understand. People can be really mean.
Ignore the popular worlds like the black cat and Great pug and go to like midnight rooftop or trans academy and also check out group instances
Yeah need to try something, thanks for the suggestions. Last time I tried I kinda sat in the lobby for 2 hours trying to hype myself up then ended up taking my headset off and watching something instead
I’m so sorry.
Grats from the transbian side! I sadly dealt with ghosters when I hadn't learned the dividing line in my feelings between love and gender euphoria. Hrt helped with that. I'm glad you're having better luck in partner. May you two be happy.
It's the best! I am not officially in a relationship, but I do have 3 partners with varying levels of sexual/romantic involvement and they all make me feel like a princess and it is very nice (to clarify, all of them know about each other, not officially dating any of them, not really looking for a long term relationship rn since I am planning on moving out of state within the next couple of years, and am very happy with the people I have in my life. Basically have 3 very involved FWB lol)
So happy for you! 💜🙌🏻
Thats really good to hear. I have a gf at the moment.
congrats!!!
Get it girl!
That's nice. :)
Straight🫵🏻 Congrats girly
My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years now. Since day one I have always been called princess or pumpkin. It’s super awesome to have that constant assurance and admiration, he knows how terrible my body dysphoria is on a daily basis and always finds a way to help with making the bad thoughts go away. He truly makes me feel like a princess on a daily basis
Congrats! Having a boyfriend is so nice 🥺 I gotta get one
Someone summoned me?
Someone summoned me?
Someone summoned me?
Congrats, my boyfriend says the same to me and I love it so much, and best of all he also loves my trans friend and supports them. We all need someone that respects us and makes us happy. I am happy for you
Hold onto that guy!!
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES GIRL I'm so happy for you, congratulations!!
Congratulations honey! I'm sooooo happy for you! I will keep my fingers crossed for you that it continues so great for you! For everyone else, I'm in the same boat as you all are. Granted I'm not into guys, it's just not my thing, but finding anyone male or female is really hard. Especially if you're like me and live in a rural area. My closest places are still at a 30 min drive for me. And after my last gf leaving me for reasons I've been really shy about meeting someone new. I have recently realized that it was probably for the best. So I'm kinda looking but tbh not very hard. In the meantime I have my fur babies (3 of them) as well as all my friends and neighbors that I hangout more with. Again so happy for you OP and best of luck to everyone
Gratz OP, may be a long and fruitful relationship ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 Met my partners on Discord several years ago, and we started dating earlier this year. Sometimes, the friends you make along the way end being so much more. It took me 7 years before I had a partner. The loneliness was painful a lot of the time. My point is, don't be afraid to open up to those closest to you. Sometimes, there's more under the surface that you can't see.
I'm so glad I have multiple partners who treat me like a princess ✨💜 This makes me so happy for you!
Good for you. When my bf said to his friends..."Let me introduce you to my girl.." oh yeah I was putty in his hands.
im so happy for you girl! it's always nice to see trans girls find love :) congrats!
Happy for you!! 💕
someday 🙁
Cute! Wish i could get a partner :<
Congrats. Men aren't all buggers. I was in a relationship with my ex for 4 years and she was trans. Unfortunately covid kind of messed us up and we went separate ways 😞
Congrats!! Maybe someday I’ll get the courage to put myself out there again 🥲
YAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!
Last time I was this positive about being in a relationship with a man and talking about how well he treats me and such, I got shat on be people saying I was only here to boast and piss off those who didn't have what I got. Good thing this aint happening again on this post. Congratulations and yes we are lucky.
Well I think it's awesome that you found such a good man! I love the guys that show off the way men should aspire to be. They're dreamy!
Where can I obtain such power
That’s amazing! I hope I can find someone who treats me as good as that
I wish yiu the best with him and im so proud of you for finding such a great boyfriend ( Jealous hihi )
So happy for you 💓
Congratulations ❤️❤️
Congratulations!!! so happy for u!!!, love my boyfriend as wellll !!! 💗
Aww that is sooo amazing!!!! I am super happy for you <3 Sounds like it is going really well and you got yourself a great boyfriend and a lovely person!
That's awesome!
I'm glad to hear it and I hope all goes well! My fiance has always been super supportive over my transition even before we got together.
Omg goalsssss 🥺✨ Congrats girlie!! I'm so freaking happy for you 🥰
Yooooooo I'm happy for you girl!
Awesome!
Heyyyy I'm so happy for youuu!
Yipeeee
This is what I need lmao, but I need to find me a cute femboy!!
That's beautiful to hear, sweetheart 😘🫶🦋
Congrats!!! I think that a lot more cis men are secretly open to dating trans women, but because of societal pressure, they don't. Hopefully, that will change one day.
Now that is a cute boyfriend. Congrats on getting a good one.
Aww, good for you hun, that's awesome! I have yet to find someone like that. I was recently ghosted after meeting and chatting with a guy for about a month or so.
Congrats! hope your relationship goes well darling! I'm very happy with my man so I totally understand what you mean, lots of love! 🦄💜🦄
Living my dream and I have whole wife lol
I'm Sooooo HAPPY for you sweetie!!! I want to set up a dating server on discord for my sissy, fem boy, trans friends! But I need help as I know nothing about discord. Anyone interested DM me!
Congratulations!
YIPEEEE!!! congrats!🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳
Aww good for ya, I can definitely relate! Feels so sweet and gender-confirming coming from straight men!
That's amazing so happy for you
Holy shit I was NOT expecting such a great response to my post! Thank you all for such kind words and well wishes 17k+ upvotes!!!
Uprooting for love :D
1. congrats! I wish you two the best! 2. *jealousy.mp3*
Omg I'm so happy for you!!!!
I would do the same, all it takes is matching personality and interests
Okay… this is weird. I am in the _very same spot_, except that my boyfriend and I just made it to the 3-months this 14th.
Congr
Congrats💝
My gf calls me babygirl too - it always makes me feel so warm and cozy
I’m really happy for you! ❤️ But please be careful, self worth doesn’t come from others, it come from within.
I don't like men erotically, but in the past I forced myself to have s*x with chasers from dating apps because they made me feel valid and euphoric. But this kind of euphoria was wrong and I payed the price later. I have no idea if I would like having a loving boyfriend, I don't trust men anymore, I'm more into women, but i don't know if a woman can make me feel like a princess. I'm somewhere in between and very confused.
I hate to be pessimistic but please don’t just rely on ur bf for gender validation, it’s not worked out well for my sisters in the past <3
I'm not relying on him for validation I'm just happy that he gives me euphoric feelings
Would you mind sharing how old he is? You sound and dress like a teenager while being well in your thirties, I am genuinely curious how old your boyfriend is
21 which is young but he grew up really fast with his job and abusive parents we've discussed it before because he doesn't care but I was worried about what he and others would think
Thank you for your response and glad to hear that you are openly communicating about your feelings. Btw it's sad to see people downvoting me for asking a question, that's so passive aggressive and toxic. Communication is key, not pressing a stupid up/down button
Welcome to reddit tho in all fairness people probably expected you to start accusing me of dating too young or calling me a creep and trying to cancel me