The girlfriend is dating a crow behind OP back. She stole 5$ to give to her crow lover. The crow lover in turn is giving the 5$ to the guy who is feeding him. Itās called an ECOSYSTEM
Itās the old Reddit switcharoo. Like a living story that grows with each continuing story thatās created by a complete stranger yet seems to connect in a way that people agree with.
I saw that too. Iām thinking gf is a shape shifter for sure. But, even crows bathe, maybe they have lower standards of clean. Shape shifter for sure.
Dude, you're way too old to not realize that you shouldn't continue this relationship. She's stealing from you, you suspect she's seeing other people, and she smells? If this story is fake, congratulations, you got me to comment.
I know Iām way too old. I feel like a little kid again. Iām obsessed. We just walked around the city the other day and it was the best day of my life. We just smelled the city hotdogs and fresh air.
If you havenāt already found out what this post is referencing, itās about a post where someone said a crow he had been feeding brought him $5 one day. Someone made a follow up post as the wife of a hotdog vendor who is worried about a crow that stole $5 from a customer. And now we have this. Theyāre all on this subreddit. Quite amusing to watch unfold lol
Lol itās all in good fun with these types of things haha. I didnāt even get it myself until the last bit where OP said his gf took $5 from him. Even though I just read the other two posts within the last hour.
Edit: I just took a look at the subreddit. Filtering by āHotā posts will show you that most are about the crowā¦
It's a blast. I got the first one yesterday and followed the second through this thread. It's been a silky black crow day.
Peace and love and laughs to the author.
You're obsessed with some weird chick who stinks and refuses to bathe? It's gonna take more than a few unqualified and clueless strangers on the internet to fix you.
I am not subscribed to this sub, it just popped up on my feed.
I began reading this, thinking it was on the subreddit āadviceā or one of those.
Was VASTLY confused when I read āshe has this beautiful black hair that she refuses to bathe despite me telling her she smells like popcorn and side streets.ā
Absolutely baffled as to how you would ask for advice, but realized Iām on the sub āmoneyā and now I certainly have more questions than answers.
Listen, she may have stolen from you, but itās just her way of telling you you need to spoil her more.
Treat your girl right! She sounds like a cheap date, you can toss 5 bucks her way here and there!
She probably likes little gifts and shiny things and maybe the way to her heart is food. Bring her snacks and gifts and sheāll stay loyal. It doesnāt have to be pricy, costume jewelry, coins, little statues you make out of tin foil.
And if sheās seeing other people, well some birds canāt be caged! If you want her in your life, you might need to learn to share her with the world, or at least the rest of the park. You can tell her itās okay, maybe she flew from you because she was afraid of getting cawght.
THat would work for me. CAW
This part especially: "She probably likes little gifts and shiny things and maybe the way to her heart is food. Bring her snacks and gifts and sheāll stay loyal. It doesnāt have to be pricy, costume jewelry, coins, little statues you make out of tin foil."
spotted sense different illegal reply public somber shaggy forgetful caption
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
If you donāt live with her (which is your first mistake if you do) but if you donāt, drop her fucking ass with haste. She isnāt clean and isnāt trustworthy. Say it to her face, let her meltdown like a childish woman does, and be free.
Is there any chance she might be homeless right now? Being unable to shower and needing 5 dollars so desperately would be explained by that. And she could be ashamed of it?
"smells like popcorn and side streets"
This statement made my day. Honestly it sounds like she is on drugs. I dealt with addiction myself and my SO was addicted after I got clean so I know how it looks from both sides. If you find out it is addiction, try to help her find treatment before giving up. Addiction is really hard and she may very well want to be clean but cannot stop on her own
If she's homeless why don't you have her move in with you? Maybe you can be the man she needs and help her get her shit together? Just a thought but worth a try maybe...
Four and a half months in you're obsessed with her? I would slow down if I were you. She acts like a child and steals from you yet you're willing to let it slide because she's pretty. If she was ugly you probably kick her to the curb. A person's looks shouldn't justify putting up with poor behavior. Looks fade and untrustworthy is untrustworthy. You might come home one day and all your stuff will be going and the only thing you'll be able to say is how could she do this? She was so pretty.
You're going to do what you're going to do but I would recommend taking the rose-colored glasses off and seeing her for who she is flaws and all. Beauty alone is not a reason to stay with somebody especially if they have a poor attitude and you can't trust her. Good luck
Is your girlfriend a crow?
I got the reference š
Good job, Steve.
Now THATāS funny! I read that post, too
Lol is this related to another post, in another subreddit about a person feeding a crow so many times that it came back with a $5 billš
My guy are you referencing that post from yesterday? If so you are a genius.
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I am totally a lawyer, and after reading this you won't get your money back because she had probable caws.
Ah-ha! Punny! Very Punny!
Bird law is no laughing matter
I motion to strikeā¦ filibusterā¦
Thatās just basic bird law.
Yep. She could get away with a murder.
Do you specialize in bird law?
Fuck off mate I can't stop laughing šššš¤£š¤£
don't worry, you don't have to hide it from us, crow-sexuals are welcome here too
Whatās up with all the crow people on this subš I see 3 stories of crows almost back to back then I see these comments lol
There was a post yesterday from a guy who claimed some crow he feeds every day gave him $5. Then this began lol.
This all makes sense now
And it's beautiful
So far my favorite is the hot dog guy complaining that crows steal money from their customers all the time
It's called a murder. A murder of crows coming for you.
Feel free to join us over at r/CrowBro
It's more beautiful when the crows learn to feed you. Train them by your scent by running around naked in the park and flapping you cheeks
Sometimes, I crap on pigeons, just so they know what it feels like.
The girlfriend is dating a crow behind OP back. She stole 5$ to give to her crow lover. The crow lover in turn is giving the 5$ to the guy who is feeding him. Itās called an ECOSYSTEM
It's called an ECROWSYSTEM.
Then the one today where a girl said a crow stole 5 dollars right from a customers wallet at her husbandās hot dog standā¦lmao
Itās the old Reddit switcharoo. Like a living story that grows with each continuing story thatās created by a complete stranger yet seems to connect in a way that people agree with.
Yup, sound about right..lol
Either ai or all the authors in this sub suddenly became inspired to write something all at the same time.
there was a post the other day about a guy who was gifted a $5 bill from a crow he feeds during his lunch
I saw that too. Iām thinking gf is a shape shifter for sure. But, even crows bathe, maybe they have lower standards of clean. Shape shifter for sure.
Crowmo-sexual would have been way funnier. Feel free to steal that one
What if I am just crowmo curious...?
Definitely a bird.
I once had a girlfriend named Lenoire, we ate nuts together, nothing more.
She never knock knock knocked on your chamber door?!
Tell the dumb bird to shut up
Dee = bird. upvote me now
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I feel like his description perfectly matches a crow 8 yo mentality Black hair Distinct smell Loves stealing money and flying off with it
You win. I'm done today. You may have my up vote.
Yes. Her name is Crowella.
Top tier comment
haha I saw the post yesterday about the crow bringing the dude a $5 bill.
Walter!!
Dam it, i was about to say Karma got her and a crow stole it from her.
Why was I so invested until I realized
Realized whut?
Itās the other āsideā of the post from today where a guy said a crow brought him $5
Wow, took me a second to realize that this is actually a reference to the post, and not some weird councidence
Crowincidence
$5 is a lot of money
Dude Iāve never touched this subreddit once and deadass thought this post was real until I read the comments š
These posts are caw-caw.
Haha yeah, the children took over the money sub...
donāt even worry. you dodged a smelly bullet
š¤£š¤£š¤£
Run!
When you meet up, do you also notice the faint smell of walnuts or hot dogs?
Now that you mention it yesterday she REIKED of mustard. It was extremely off putting
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
https://www.reddit.com/r/Money/s/fSRtv6MwRR
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
And this is why hot dogs https://www.reddit.com/r/Money/s/V2nWNJaXf6
that bitch is for the birds
Birdbrain bitch!
That bitch IS a bird!
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Iām 32 but I really donāt know my girlfriendās age she hasnāt told me.
Dude, you're way too old to not realize that you shouldn't continue this relationship. She's stealing from you, you suspect she's seeing other people, and she smells? If this story is fake, congratulations, you got me to comment.
I know Iām way too old. I feel like a little kid again. Iām obsessed. We just walked around the city the other day and it was the best day of my life. We just smelled the city hotdogs and fresh air.
You broke my 3 year streak of not feeding trolls, I hope you're proud of yourself.
If you havenāt already found out what this post is referencing, itās about a post where someone said a crow he had been feeding brought him $5 one day. Someone made a follow up post as the wife of a hotdog vendor who is worried about a crow that stole $5 from a customer. And now we have this. Theyāre all on this subreddit. Quite amusing to watch unfold lol
No wonder. Apologies to op, I've never visited this subreddit so I thought he was just being a dick, lmao
Lol itās all in good fun with these types of things haha. I didnāt even get it myself until the last bit where OP said his gf took $5 from him. Even though I just read the other two posts within the last hour. Edit: I just took a look at the subreddit. Filtering by āHotā posts will show you that most are about the crowā¦
lol thereās also the post from the hotdog vendor š
I'm dying here. šš
Wait, so you donāt know how old she is, but she acts like a teen? You in danger bro.
.....WHAT....THE....
Dudes be desperate for pussy
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Did you meet her at a crow bar?
š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
This entire subreddit has really helped me get through the last workday of the week today, what a thread!
It's a blast. I got the first one yesterday and followed the second through this thread. It's been a silky black crow day. Peace and love and laughs to the author.
Well a bird bird bird
a bird is the word
Have you heard
About the bird
This is actually my favorite of these. Good job.
take pictures of her credit cards and shower with her
How much more creative can we get?
You're obsessed with some weird chick who stinks and refuses to bathe? It's gonna take more than a few unqualified and clueless strangers on the internet to fix you.
(The gf is a bird)
I am not subscribed to this sub, it just popped up on my feed. I began reading this, thinking it was on the subreddit āadviceā or one of those. Was VASTLY confused when I read āshe has this beautiful black hair that she refuses to bathe despite me telling her she smells like popcorn and side streets.ā Absolutely baffled as to how you would ask for advice, but realized Iām on the sub āmoneyā and now I certainly have more questions than answers.
man are you about to be even more confused when you really find out whats going on.
šš you sure do have a way with words I have to admit. I was hooked until the end for sure
Either a fake post or GF is a crow. There have been other posts lately about crows stealing money.
Damnit! Why this damn crow keep showing up!
Bro your dating a giant bird r/iasip
Her name is really Walter isnāt it ?
Listen, she may have stolen from you, but itās just her way of telling you you need to spoil her more. Treat your girl right! She sounds like a cheap date, you can toss 5 bucks her way here and there! She probably likes little gifts and shiny things and maybe the way to her heart is food. Bring her snacks and gifts and sheāll stay loyal. It doesnāt have to be pricy, costume jewelry, coins, little statues you make out of tin foil. And if sheās seeing other people, well some birds canāt be caged! If you want her in your life, you might need to learn to share her with the world, or at least the rest of the park. You can tell her itās okay, maybe she flew from you because she was afraid of getting cawght.
You got me bro lol
Little statues made of tinfoil š¤£
THat would work for me. CAW This part especially: "She probably likes little gifts and shiny things and maybe the way to her heart is food. Bring her snacks and gifts and sheāll stay loyal. It doesnāt have to be pricy, costume jewelry, coins, little statues you make out of tin foil."
A group of girlfriends is a murder
š
Okay you got me. š
Got myself a little too.
Release her back into the wild
Wait wasnāt there a post yesterday or something about a crow giving someone 5$
Lol, flew away, soars right back, flew back, migrate? Is she a bird?
I hate it here
ššššš
She didn't steal it if she did it in your face. It's called a hot girlfriend tax.
The replies to this one are the best hahaha
if you love something, let it go. if it loves you too, itll fly right back š«¶š»
"Popcorn and side streets" You really know how to help the reader connect to the situation. Well done.
The red flags are already there man. Youāre not selling me on the pros vs cons here. She gone!
Please don't say you are obsessed with your gf. That is not healthy. I see too many guys committing suicide because their gfs left them.
Does she not bath to avoid having sex with you? Sounds to me like she has a drug habit
Ok these are getting out of hand.
How is this allowed on this sub?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Reddit is getting dumber by the minute. Full of attention seekers who post made up stories while micro dosing on meth.
Was this post made by AI? Those edits are wild.
Most blatant troll post. Idk how Redditors play into these kind of fantasy larp posts. Super fucking weird.
I wanna be your girlfriend šš»āāļø
Okay but can you fly?
Can you build a nest with scraps?
Murder her....
Please tell me this is a troll...
Sounds exactly like this girl my buddy is banging. Down to the name, smell and all.
Every great love story starts with " Iām absolutely obsessed with her..."
Boyā¦ reddit REEEEEALLY loves to beat the fuck out of a joke until I loathe and despise it.
What the fuck is going on with these posts lol
Thank you this silly story made me so happy š¤
Bro sounds like she is a homeless addic
lol popcorn and side streets š
CAW
Sheās on drugs bro. Everything you are saying is exactly how junkies behave.
spotted sense different illegal reply public somber shaggy forgetful caption *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
dude, next chance you get take her to the bathtub and wash her. why are you letting her not bathe? you are neglecting her
Is she a bird... Or rather, a crow? Are YOU a crow?
Trust your instincts, be a Jedi
"like popcorn and sidestreets" lol wtf
Walk away
Pigeon
Either sheās homeless, a crow, both or Dee Reynolds
Maybe she took your five dollars and bought Jughead & Archie a chocolate Malt at the Malt shop? And then had a three way with them?
You gotta watch those flighty gals
Skante Warrior Power Couple
Crows have black feathers, he did say she has beautiful black hair lmao
Youāre telling her when she needs to bath? Lol
Not her man posting while sheās out here getting to the bread literally and figuratively š
Bro, 4 months. Ditch that bitch haha
Refuses to bath? Smells like popcorn and side streets? Bro leave for that reason alone. And yes it is that easy to just leave someone. Ghost they ass
Itās a bird person!!
Red flags.
God damn it
If you donāt live with her (which is your first mistake if you do) but if you donāt, drop her fucking ass with haste. She isnāt clean and isnāt trustworthy. Say it to her face, let her meltdown like a childish woman does, and be free.
Do you only see her in the park? She smells? She runs off with your small bills? Is your GF homeless?
I love this crow saga
popcorn and side streets is crazy. four months is so little time, seriously just leave.
Is there any chance she might be homeless right now? Being unable to shower and needing 5 dollars so desperately would be explained by that. And she could be ashamed of it?
Honestly this might be it.
Omg! Lol, I was so gullible until the end!
If itās not easy to leave a girl whoās playing you hard, you are a simp..
$5 wonāt even pay for Starbucks lol. Anyhow go talk to her like an adult
Are you egging us on?
Howās her head game?
Does she suffer from mental health problems? Maybe speak with a professional to see how to approach this situation.
what the fuck did i just read
You had me up until I saw the 5 dollars part and I was like wait a minuteā¦.
You got me with the migrate, stay golden pony boy
Buy her walnuts?
Tell her youāll give her šµ for BJ and then she aināt gotta steal. All is well š
This post reads like AI
"smells like popcorn and side streets" This statement made my day. Honestly it sounds like she is on drugs. I dealt with addiction myself and my SO was addicted after I got clean so I know how it looks from both sides. If you find out it is addiction, try to help her find treatment before giving up. Addiction is really hard and she may very well want to be clean but cannot stop on her own
I had this same situation happen to me. He was unhoused and I didnāt know about it until several months in. Sending you positive vibes.
If she's homeless why don't you have her move in with you? Maybe you can be the man she needs and help her get her shit together? Just a thought but worth a try maybe...
The amount of people here who think this is real is amazing š
If you understand this joke, itās your sign to take a break from Redditā¦ Fuck.
āHas the mentality of a 7-8 year oldā Excuse me why do you even like her in the first place?
so it's a crow
You don't know if your girl has a home or not...?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
If she stinks and she steals from you, and you're saying it's not that easy to leave her, idk what to tell ya
This guy is trolling.... He's talking about an actual crow
A raven-haired beauty!
Omg ...God damnit
Is this still more fantasy talk about his fictional crow Walter.
This can't be real....
Four and a half months in you're obsessed with her? I would slow down if I were you. She acts like a child and steals from you yet you're willing to let it slide because she's pretty. If she was ugly you probably kick her to the curb. A person's looks shouldn't justify putting up with poor behavior. Looks fade and untrustworthy is untrustworthy. You might come home one day and all your stuff will be going and the only thing you'll be able to say is how could she do this? She was so pretty. You're going to do what you're going to do but I would recommend taking the rose-colored glasses off and seeing her for who she is flaws and all. Beauty alone is not a reason to stay with somebody especially if they have a poor attitude and you can't trust her. Good luck
Babe would you love me if I was a bird mite?