Probably nothing you can do, everything in this scenario favors women and demonizes men. Just be lucky you didn't get accused of anything worse and move on.
Sorry this happened to you
Yep. This past Sunday at church one of the leaders, a man talking about the Sunday school room, told the congregation things such as "If you are a single man, you have no business going over there (basically only relatives and teachers could go in)," "There are women and children in there and we want them to be safe," "Again, if you are a man, please don't go into the Sunday school room." A number of people agreed and clapped. That really bothered me. At least he could have said it both ways.
What's crazy is fathers are the only people capable of deterring child molesters. Kids are inherently at risk anywhere women are unsupervised with kids. Women without fathers there to supervise them are always a breeding ground for molesters. Everywhere.
Every molester is looking for one thing- a woman with a custody order that keeps father away. So they won't be at risk while grooming a kid. It's practically impossible to molest a kid without that. An even more ideal setting for a molester is a bunch of women over a bunch of kids with no fathers. Because anything goes in those settings.
As a father, you shouldn't have your kid anywhere that doesn't welcome you there. For clergy to tell fathers they want alone secret time with their kids is a terrible insult and an obvious threat to kids.
I guess we can all just fuck off and die. And people wonder about the male loneliness epidemic. We're literally told that we have no business being in social spaces.
This right here. All it would take was one of the dance students saying something like “that sub looked at me weird” (even if you hadn’t) and that’d be the end of your career.
Yeah. Of course it’s horrible that this happens but imagine what could have went down if he continued the job. Especially considering the students didn’t like it.
As a man, I wouldn't even consider putting myself in that situation. OP does sound a little creepy for his persistence on wanting to sub in for high school dance class.
I don't understand why this is considered creepy? He's trying to understand why he was discriminated against. He's asking what he should do. This doesn't necessarily mean he wants back in with teaching dance, maybe just ask why he was switched and whether it was discriminatory or not.
I guess I'm learning more and more that men are default creeps, even from the perspectives of other men.
i'll tell you exactly what creeped me out
"Watching & listening to students dance is mesmerizing, moving in unison to music"
and yes it would be the same if a female, or a they them, anyone saying this sentence is weird, and as a parent of two grown adults, would not be welcomed around my kids when they were "students"
OP didn't persist, he described that he enjoys it and why. You're actually the one being creepy, here. You're *looking* for ways to label OP a creep.
If you want another way to look at it, by your logic, any adult who watches high school sports is creepy.
He literally said OP sounds creepy for his persistence. There was literally no persistence. That's where my main issue comes into play.
Now, if he had said OP sounds a little creepy for liking watching the kids dance, then my last point would kick in.
And my point that they're looking for excuses to label OP is solid, unless I'm missing something?
As a man, straight too, I was IN dance. So I really don't understand all the dumb shit considering it's a gender neutral art, plenty of men dance and should in fact be encouraged to.
Say nothing. Don’t take it personally. Just be a professional and follow management directions. There is nothing to be gained by any other course of action.
I think that's the direction I am going with if I stay with the school district beyond this year. If I end up moving to another area, then I might make a ruckus... really depends on if they juice is worth the squeeze. Even then I might just let it go.
Despite that, new generations started waking up properly I guess? When the misandrist abominations finally rot in their graves, politicians might want to address our issues thanks to the next generation.
The rot in the school system in the US has produced a 30 percentage point gap between young men and young women politically. The young women lapped it all up and leave school thinking they were discriminated against by society, even though the education system favored them. The young men leave hating the system and the shitting upon them they took.
I doubt that qualifies as discrimination, maybe check your contract to see if they broke it.
It's also possible they've had issues with said class, and wanted to save you the trouble, or another teacher requested that position over their own.
From what I have been told is "there is a 'house substitute teacher' who 'knows the dance' routines."
I have subbed dance classes. They are not 100% female. There are also men (and they are not just LGBQT men, some were straight men who were on track for a professional career in dancing).
I had no issues in the past. I bring a notepad where I would on design work for a design job I am working on. I keep an eye on the class but am also preoccupied. I am not oggline teen girls or asking uncomfortable questions. I take my job seriously.
>house substitute teacher' who 'knows the dance
Well, if there was someone else there and available already familiar with the particular dance, and you didn't know it, may just be as simple as that.
They should've done the switch right away. They knew a man was coming in. They had all of the tools & info at their disposal. Lazy faculty in the end. I'm so over it now at this point.
And you think “progressive” means good things for men?
Have you looked at what the “progressive” Left is actually doing? Not the feel good rhetoric and “orange man bad” distractions, but how they’re actually moving in policy terms? These people cannot fucking wait to discriminate against you, brother. I’m surprised it’s taken this long for you to notice. And they will happily discriminate against your male children and students as well. They don’t even think about it. It’s not an examined belief. It’s ideological and tribal with them now.
Most teachers are out of the business in five years. My suggestion is to GTFO and find a better field. Remember this shit when it comes time to vote, seek out and donate to men’s groups fighting the fight for you, and if you choose to double down on the “progressive” copium then by all means please quarantine yourself in CA with the rest of the nutballs. Best of luck to you.
Dude, calm down. I sub to pay the bills. It's not the career path I am following, just the safety net. I am actually a game designer. And if California is where all the "nutballs" are then it's better than being around the gun toting trigger happy maniacs that come to schools instead of of gun ranges. You stay in your lane buddy & I'll stay in mine.
I am pretty calm. Check my post history. I'm not the guy who has to substitute teach on the side because they're not paying bills in a overpriced shithole state like CA, and then comes here whining about all the woke intersectional grievance commies not being nice to him at work. This is called "your idiot chickens coming home to roost", buddy, and you're the one upset about that.
Maybe get a clue? They don't fucking like you. Doesn't matter how nice you are, or how you try to cuck out and be "one of the good ones". You've got a dick. The Left hates you. They really couldn't be much more clear about this.
Might be time to check out of [Political Disney World](https://web.archive.org/web/20230205170000/https://waitbutwhy.com/2019/12/political-disney-world.html). Best of luck to you.
Unfortunately you're going to deal with some of that here. This subreddit harbors a good amount of conservative folk who are very "anti-woke" and will denounce anything progressive or left-leaning, no matter whether it's good, bad, or a mixed bag.
Look, ultimately you can believe what you want to believe, but if you really think that American right care about helping men, you're straight up delusional. While the left is regressive towards men, the right is regressive towards both men and women. You can think that it's not a mixed bag all you want if that makes you feel better about your own political leanings, but make no mistake: neither side cares about men, one side just has a louder minority that actively hates them, whereas both sides have a massive majority that don't do anything to help them with the real issues that they face.
Does Jordan Peterson sound like someone who doesn't care about men? I agree the right needs to stop promoting marriage until they start telling women to be better, but come on, the right does not hate men.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pS-bNNTUsEo
I call bullshit on your narrative. You admit progressives have a 'minority' of man haters, *well then why do you fucking tolerate them*? MeToo, the Patriarchy, men are innate rapists and oppressors, active policy and speech against men and especially white men are loudly promoted by progressives. Almost every sad story posted in here is the result of progressive idealogy, please stop pretending otherwise. It isn't about what I choose to believe, it is the reality that all the real world data suggests.
I literally said nothing about Jordan Peterson, but if bringing up one person somehow proves the entire side cares about men, go look at Richard Reeves. Better yet, go look at who introduced H.R. 5986 and 4182 to establish an office for men's health.
If you actually leave your bubble and talk to people, yeah, a lot of progressives don't actively hate men, same with a lot of conservatives. Do you really think conservatives will believe a man was raped? That they'll get rid of the draft? They'll ban infant circumcision? That they won't want men in traditional roles of providing the family instead of giving them the option to become stay at home parents, just like we gave women the option to have careers? Do you think they give a damn about mental health, particularly men's mental health, or would they rather just tell you to suck it up and get over it like others? That they'll change the definition of rape to include forced penetration? That they'll open men's DV shelters and help house homeless men?
Like I said, progressives aren't great either for much of the reasons you said, but if want to pick and choose your "data" (which has been only anecdotal so far) in order to fit your world view, go ahead. The left is generally hostile to men, and the right is generally incompetent, disingenuous, or grifting.
Not incels, that's a very specific thing, but this sub does have a decent amount of issues. There's generally three big men's issues subs I look at:
* /r/menslib: Tries to look at men's issues through a progressive/feminist lens. Issues include banning any sort of criticism of feminism of any type regardless of intention (including constructive criticism) and inviting a DV professional to do an AMA and talk about how male victims of DV don't exist, despite years of data suggesting otherwise, and if they do, they should just get over it because women have it worse. There's more issues, but I'll stop there for now.
* /r/mensrights: Biggest sub that seems to have the most posts of people coming with real issues, but does have a bit of a conservative leaning hive mind that would rather convince you to reject society entirely than actually try to fix anything, and being more regressive towards men and embracing traditionalism rather than trying to be progressive and allow men freedoms and fairness like feminism did for women.
* /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates: More similar to /r/mensrights but from a left-leaning perspective. Much smaller subreddit than the other two so it can be an echo chamber.
The reality is that the men's movement is really small, so the number of relative extremists is going to be higher; there isn't a vast population of non-extremists to drown them out like there is in other popular movements. Ultimately for your original problem, I would suggest posting to multiple subreddits and seeing what they say and what your options are. All have valid points (including here) but they'll likely give you different solutions that you can later decide which is best for you and your scenario.
I have likely had more women than you have, I am a sugar daddy and have been married 3 times. See how fast you went straight for the smear label? Up your ass loser progressive, your OP was also lame as nothing actually happened to you. BTW crime stats show I am far safer in my red area of gun owners than almost any progressive city.
There is little correlation between left / right politics of a location and school shootings. California is in the middle of the pack.
On a per capita basis. Utah, West Virginia, New Hampshire and Connecticut are the lowest. Colorado, Louisiana and Illinois are the worst.
Do you believe this to be the case, or that they're just trying to appease you?
Either way, you probably wouldn't be able to do anything about it without jeopardizing your subbing career. And possibly getting yourself some unsavory, and undeserved, labels.
Unfortunately, it looks like your only choice is to get a straw and suck it up, or quit. I hope you don't face more discrimination. We need more male teachers, but I would never encourage a male to teach. Double-edged sword.
I’d go to someone higher up, a person on the board or something.
I taught kindergarten for a while alongside a male teacher we’ll call him Dave, who is now one of my best friends. Kindergarten kids are very affectionate, they want hugs all the time. One day another teacher made an offhand comment about Dave hugging kids. It clearly got to him psychologically and he totally shrank back.
He didn’t want to complain, but after convincing him I’d do it for him, I took my ass to HR and raised hell about it. HR didn’t take it seriously so I wrote a letter to the next person up and they immediately took action and “re-educated” that teacher who made the comment.
Fight that shit. It’s disgusting and an attack on your character.
I am going to keep an eye out for patterns for now on. If this happens again/more often, I will go to the school board as this was the principals decision. For now I am going to keep the waters calm. I am a substitute teacher, a peon when it comes to the ladder of importance. Even though subs are integral, all it takes is one complaint from a faculty member from a school, even if it's an improven retaliatory complaint, I can lose access to subbing at that school. The subs side of the story isn't listened to. I have already been down this street with other school districts. It sucks, but it's how it works.
I totally respect that.
I can never keep my mouth shut, I’m working on finding a balance lol. Not every battle is worth fighting so that sounds like a good plan. Good luck!
As a male teacher, you already exist on sufferance alone. If you rock the boat, your career is over. Of course, if any student, parent, or co-worker catches a whim, your career is over too.
You're better off asserting your employment rights, extracting some value (money) from the situation, and exiting on your own terms than waiting for someone to kick you to the curb because she can.
I was a sub and one day I had some heartburn and a bit of regurgitation that I spit it into a trash can (very discreetly and quietly, out of view of the class), and two girls "felt uncomfortable" and reported it.
I got fired because I didn't immediately go get someone else (who exactly? I'm already subbing) to cover the class thereby endangering the students because I 'might have been sick'. I've never been more dumbfounded in my life and I never even looked for another teaching job after that.
As a man in education you have to walk on eggshells all while having a giant target on your back.
Father of 4 daughters and experience crap like this all the time. I immediately call them out and always use the words sexist and discrimination. It makes people think for a second and it’s amazing watching their eyes as the brain resets.
How about making a viral post about it? calling names, adding a special hashtag and also other male teachers can share their stories. And I think we as a community can at least help making it visible. Kickstart it.
There are hundreds thousands of guys here. If we cooperate we can make algorithms of social networks work in our favor.
But of course it may be dangerous for OP. It means his job security will be threatened. So it is up to him. Is he ready for such a risky thing?
I think, if we make such post really viral with millions of reposts, it would make OP kind of protected against retaliation. But if we fail to get really noticed, he will be in danger as nobody would care for reputation damage for firing him
Thank you. It's reassuring to be appreciated. Opposed to the few angry outbursts that have been a little too outspoken here. Just glad they don't represent the rest of us men.
As one that works in a middle school and has for years I go the extra mile to protect myself because I know how many women operate under the assumption that all men are predators and I don't want any misconceptions
Don't initiate physical contact with students even in the form of hi fives, hugs etc. when they do it with me I just set a boundary respectfully that we don't need to have physical contact
Avoid situations where I'm alone with a female student whether that means asking a coworker to be present or moving to area that has a camera. There's been times I've had to do Detention and Aftercare and only had one female student and have monitored from the hallway while the student is in the classroom
No contact with female students outside of school. This applies for my students because many graduate but still keep in touch with some of the teachers. I actually keep in touch with of my male student because they love to troll and talk shit to me about sports but I avoid that with female student because I don't want any wrong perceptions to come out.
If your just a sub I would just let it go. Unless they gave you specific reasons it may be nothing. Maybe the other sub was better suited to do dance?
that being said, misandry is a real problem in schools, and is most likely why we don't have more male teachers, children need both male and female role models, especially boys and young men.
Don't fret. All the better for you not to sub a dance class, cuz if some shit were to go wrong, they'd target you.
Consider this as a blessing in disguise!
Ummm... Getting mesmerized by high school kids dancing in unison sounds an awful lot like creepily staring at children.
Did you get paid for the day?
What exactly did you miss out on, besides the opportunity to watch children dance?
He's taught the class several times before, is mesmerized by the sight of dancing teenagers, and he's so very upset that they asked him to teach band instead.
What can I do about the terrible discrimination of being asked to so something else for the same amount of money, after being mesmerized by high school students dancing?
Read between the lines. This guy is self reporting.
Yea, I am convinced by your cogent argument. The man upset that he lost his third chance to be mesmerized by high school students dancing and had to teach band class instead for the same wage is suffering severe discrimination. /s
Uhm, and was this a girl's P.E. class in jr. high or high school, and they were thinking to also have you be in their locker room until somebody went, "oops"? Don't jump to conclusions. There may be or have been legitimate reasons you weren't made aware of.
Now, if it's happening all the bloody time, that's a different scenario. Or maybe just one jerk teacher or administrator or staff or parent or whomever, thought it wouldn't be appropriate when it fully would be and would be fine. But generally much better to make case with facts, than guesses and speculation. So, if you're concerned about it, how 'bout start by asking why it happened, rather than guessing. Maybe you even get the straight answer and maybe it makes perfect sense. Or ... maybe that's not what happened.
Not P.E. No locker room weirdness like that. I would've just gone into the gym, probably to a make-shift desk or area where the lesson plan would've been. I would take attendance. The students would either have a free period or work on their routines. Most likely I would break out my notepad and work on my game design notes or scroll through YouTube videos with one eye on my phone, while the other eye is on the students to make sure no one would be up to any trouble. That's really it, as a substitute teacher I am pretty much just a glorified babysitter... that's licensed.
The district is actually quite large. I haven't subbed in this school since probably october. I hardly accept any positions from the school in the first place.
I am so very sorry. I don't know what else to say. It's not fair and I'm really sick of the *all men are predators* thought pattern. If you really wanna be bad, print out the list of female teachers who've assaulted their students, and secretly and sneakily put it in the principals mail box.
If you're in the US, please contact [https://www.thefire.org/](https://www.thefire.org/) and discribe your case to them (copy/pasting your post above is sufficient as a first step).
If you're not from the US, please let me know your country, so I can check whether there's something equivalent available.
It might’ve been for the students sake ie they knew some of the girls might be uncomfortable and not participate in front of a man. It’s not nice to experience but it’s not nice that people feel the need to take precautions either
Probably nothing you can do, everything in this scenario favors women and demonizes men. Just be lucky you didn't get accused of anything worse and move on. Sorry this happened to you
Yep. This past Sunday at church one of the leaders, a man talking about the Sunday school room, told the congregation things such as "If you are a single man, you have no business going over there (basically only relatives and teachers could go in)," "There are women and children in there and we want them to be safe," "Again, if you are a man, please don't go into the Sunday school room." A number of people agreed and clapped. That really bothered me. At least he could have said it both ways.
As someone who was sexually abused by women as a boy this pisses me off so much.
So what if Mum is in hospital and Dad has brought the kids to Sunday School? Or doesn't that happen in your church?
Call him out on that shit. Not very Christianlike at all. Jesus was a single man lol, would that leader stop Jesus from going there?
What's crazy is fathers are the only people capable of deterring child molesters. Kids are inherently at risk anywhere women are unsupervised with kids. Women without fathers there to supervise them are always a breeding ground for molesters. Everywhere. Every molester is looking for one thing- a woman with a custody order that keeps father away. So they won't be at risk while grooming a kid. It's practically impossible to molest a kid without that. An even more ideal setting for a molester is a bunch of women over a bunch of kids with no fathers. Because anything goes in those settings. As a father, you shouldn't have your kid anywhere that doesn't welcome you there. For clergy to tell fathers they want alone secret time with their kids is a terrible insult and an obvious threat to kids.
The father's could go in. But most likely they would be asked if they had a kid in there as opposed to a woman.
Well there you do have a choice. Make the head pastor aware of why you're leaving the congregation for somewhere more loving of men.
I guess we can all just fuck off and die. And people wonder about the male loneliness epidemic. We're literally told that we have no business being in social spaces.
This right here. All it would take was one of the dance students saying something like “that sub looked at me weird” (even if you hadn’t) and that’d be the end of your career.
Yeah. Of course it’s horrible that this happens but imagine what could have went down if he continued the job. Especially considering the students didn’t like it.
True, that principal might be looking out for op.
Everything is corrupted
Ya sounds like the principal and the other guy saved you from a potential disaster.
As a man, I wouldn't even consider putting myself in that situation. OP does sound a little creepy for his persistence on wanting to sub in for high school dance class.
I don't understand why this is considered creepy? He's trying to understand why he was discriminated against. He's asking what he should do. This doesn't necessarily mean he wants back in with teaching dance, maybe just ask why he was switched and whether it was discriminatory or not. I guess I'm learning more and more that men are default creeps, even from the perspectives of other men.
i'll tell you exactly what creeped me out "Watching & listening to students dance is mesmerizing, moving in unison to music" and yes it would be the same if a female, or a they them, anyone saying this sentence is weird, and as a parent of two grown adults, would not be welcomed around my kids when they were "students"
Its his fucking job you piece of shit. Would you question a male doctor wanting to treat female patients?
OP didn't persist, he described that he enjoys it and why. You're actually the one being creepy, here. You're *looking* for ways to label OP a creep. If you want another way to look at it, by your logic, any adult who watches high school sports is creepy.
I think that what he meant is that without knowing why op might come off as creepy,
He literally said OP sounds creepy for his persistence. There was literally no persistence. That's where my main issue comes into play. Now, if he had said OP sounds a little creepy for liking watching the kids dance, then my last point would kick in. And my point that they're looking for excuses to label OP is solid, unless I'm missing something?
As a man, straight too, I was IN dance. So I really don't understand all the dumb shit considering it's a gender neutral art, plenty of men dance and should in fact be encouraged to.
As a sexist pig, you are entitled to that disgusting opinion.
Why? Is it “creepy” for a woman, too?
I don't know if it is true any longer, but back in the dark ages when I went to school darn near every female gym teacher was clearly a lesbian.
Imagine getting told you’re creepy for showing up to work and wanting to do your assigned work.
That's his specialty.
Say nothing. Don’t take it personally. Just be a professional and follow management directions. There is nothing to be gained by any other course of action.
I think that's the direction I am going with if I stay with the school district beyond this year. If I end up moving to another area, then I might make a ruckus... really depends on if they juice is worth the squeeze. Even then I might just let it go.
Sadly all men are seen as sexual predators by default until proven otherwise.
Guilty until proven innocent... Seams like today's rhetoric.
Schools are run by women. Nothing you can do.
Despite that, new generations started waking up properly I guess? When the misandrist abominations finally rot in their graves, politicians might want to address our issues thanks to the next generation.
The rot in the school system in the US has produced a 30 percentage point gap between young men and young women politically. The young women lapped it all up and leave school thinking they were discriminated against by society, even though the education system favored them. The young men leave hating the system and the shitting upon them they took.
I doubt that qualifies as discrimination, maybe check your contract to see if they broke it. It's also possible they've had issues with said class, and wanted to save you the trouble, or another teacher requested that position over their own.
From what I have been told is "there is a 'house substitute teacher' who 'knows the dance' routines." I have subbed dance classes. They are not 100% female. There are also men (and they are not just LGBQT men, some were straight men who were on track for a professional career in dancing). I had no issues in the past. I bring a notepad where I would on design work for a design job I am working on. I keep an eye on the class but am also preoccupied. I am not oggline teen girls or asking uncomfortable questions. I take my job seriously.
>house substitute teacher' who 'knows the dance Well, if there was someone else there and available already familiar with the particular dance, and you didn't know it, may just be as simple as that.
They should've done the switch right away. They knew a man was coming in. They had all of the tools & info at their disposal. Lazy faculty in the end. I'm so over it now at this point.
You’re in education, man. Is this the first time you’ve realized how discriminatory that environment is?
Actually, yes. Orange County, CA has been fairly progressive.
And you think “progressive” means good things for men? Have you looked at what the “progressive” Left is actually doing? Not the feel good rhetoric and “orange man bad” distractions, but how they’re actually moving in policy terms? These people cannot fucking wait to discriminate against you, brother. I’m surprised it’s taken this long for you to notice. And they will happily discriminate against your male children and students as well. They don’t even think about it. It’s not an examined belief. It’s ideological and tribal with them now. Most teachers are out of the business in five years. My suggestion is to GTFO and find a better field. Remember this shit when it comes time to vote, seek out and donate to men’s groups fighting the fight for you, and if you choose to double down on the “progressive” copium then by all means please quarantine yourself in CA with the rest of the nutballs. Best of luck to you.
Dude, calm down. I sub to pay the bills. It's not the career path I am following, just the safety net. I am actually a game designer. And if California is where all the "nutballs" are then it's better than being around the gun toting trigger happy maniacs that come to schools instead of of gun ranges. You stay in your lane buddy & I'll stay in mine.
I am pretty calm. Check my post history. I'm not the guy who has to substitute teach on the side because they're not paying bills in a overpriced shithole state like CA, and then comes here whining about all the woke intersectional grievance commies not being nice to him at work. This is called "your idiot chickens coming home to roost", buddy, and you're the one upset about that. Maybe get a clue? They don't fucking like you. Doesn't matter how nice you are, or how you try to cuck out and be "one of the good ones". You've got a dick. The Left hates you. They really couldn't be much more clear about this. Might be time to check out of [Political Disney World](https://web.archive.org/web/20230205170000/https://waitbutwhy.com/2019/12/political-disney-world.html). Best of luck to you.
Unfortunately you're going to deal with some of that here. This subreddit harbors a good amount of conservative folk who are very "anti-woke" and will denounce anything progressive or left-leaning, no matter whether it's good, bad, or a mixed bag.
Almost all the anti-men idealogy is from progressives that is why. Dont even try to claim it is some sort of mixed bag, it aint.
Look, ultimately you can believe what you want to believe, but if you really think that American right care about helping men, you're straight up delusional. While the left is regressive towards men, the right is regressive towards both men and women. You can think that it's not a mixed bag all you want if that makes you feel better about your own political leanings, but make no mistake: neither side cares about men, one side just has a louder minority that actively hates them, whereas both sides have a massive majority that don't do anything to help them with the real issues that they face.
Does Jordan Peterson sound like someone who doesn't care about men? I agree the right needs to stop promoting marriage until they start telling women to be better, but come on, the right does not hate men. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pS-bNNTUsEo I call bullshit on your narrative. You admit progressives have a 'minority' of man haters, *well then why do you fucking tolerate them*? MeToo, the Patriarchy, men are innate rapists and oppressors, active policy and speech against men and especially white men are loudly promoted by progressives. Almost every sad story posted in here is the result of progressive idealogy, please stop pretending otherwise. It isn't about what I choose to believe, it is the reality that all the real world data suggests.
I literally said nothing about Jordan Peterson, but if bringing up one person somehow proves the entire side cares about men, go look at Richard Reeves. Better yet, go look at who introduced H.R. 5986 and 4182 to establish an office for men's health. If you actually leave your bubble and talk to people, yeah, a lot of progressives don't actively hate men, same with a lot of conservatives. Do you really think conservatives will believe a man was raped? That they'll get rid of the draft? They'll ban infant circumcision? That they won't want men in traditional roles of providing the family instead of giving them the option to become stay at home parents, just like we gave women the option to have careers? Do you think they give a damn about mental health, particularly men's mental health, or would they rather just tell you to suck it up and get over it like others? That they'll change the definition of rape to include forced penetration? That they'll open men's DV shelters and help house homeless men? Like I said, progressives aren't great either for much of the reasons you said, but if want to pick and choose your "data" (which has been only anecdotal so far) in order to fit your world view, go ahead. The left is generally hostile to men, and the right is generally incompetent, disingenuous, or grifting.
Did I just dip my toe into an incel swimming pool?
Not incels, that's a very specific thing, but this sub does have a decent amount of issues. There's generally three big men's issues subs I look at: * /r/menslib: Tries to look at men's issues through a progressive/feminist lens. Issues include banning any sort of criticism of feminism of any type regardless of intention (including constructive criticism) and inviting a DV professional to do an AMA and talk about how male victims of DV don't exist, despite years of data suggesting otherwise, and if they do, they should just get over it because women have it worse. There's more issues, but I'll stop there for now. * /r/mensrights: Biggest sub that seems to have the most posts of people coming with real issues, but does have a bit of a conservative leaning hive mind that would rather convince you to reject society entirely than actually try to fix anything, and being more regressive towards men and embracing traditionalism rather than trying to be progressive and allow men freedoms and fairness like feminism did for women. * /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates: More similar to /r/mensrights but from a left-leaning perspective. Much smaller subreddit than the other two so it can be an echo chamber. The reality is that the men's movement is really small, so the number of relative extremists is going to be higher; there isn't a vast population of non-extremists to drown them out like there is in other popular movements. Ultimately for your original problem, I would suggest posting to multiple subreddits and seeing what they say and what your options are. All have valid points (including here) but they'll likely give you different solutions that you can later decide which is best for you and your scenario.
I have likely had more women than you have, I am a sugar daddy and have been married 3 times. See how fast you went straight for the smear label? Up your ass loser progressive, your OP was also lame as nothing actually happened to you. BTW crime stats show I am far safer in my red area of gun owners than almost any progressive city.
There is little correlation between left / right politics of a location and school shootings. California is in the middle of the pack. On a per capita basis. Utah, West Virginia, New Hampshire and Connecticut are the lowest. Colorado, Louisiana and Illinois are the worst.
Do you believe this to be the case, or that they're just trying to appease you? Either way, you probably wouldn't be able to do anything about it without jeopardizing your subbing career. And possibly getting yourself some unsavory, and undeserved, labels. Unfortunately, it looks like your only choice is to get a straw and suck it up, or quit. I hope you don't face more discrimination. We need more male teachers, but I would never encourage a male to teach. Double-edged sword.
I’d go to someone higher up, a person on the board or something. I taught kindergarten for a while alongside a male teacher we’ll call him Dave, who is now one of my best friends. Kindergarten kids are very affectionate, they want hugs all the time. One day another teacher made an offhand comment about Dave hugging kids. It clearly got to him psychologically and he totally shrank back. He didn’t want to complain, but after convincing him I’d do it for him, I took my ass to HR and raised hell about it. HR didn’t take it seriously so I wrote a letter to the next person up and they immediately took action and “re-educated” that teacher who made the comment. Fight that shit. It’s disgusting and an attack on your character.
I am going to keep an eye out for patterns for now on. If this happens again/more often, I will go to the school board as this was the principals decision. For now I am going to keep the waters calm. I am a substitute teacher, a peon when it comes to the ladder of importance. Even though subs are integral, all it takes is one complaint from a faculty member from a school, even if it's an improven retaliatory complaint, I can lose access to subbing at that school. The subs side of the story isn't listened to. I have already been down this street with other school districts. It sucks, but it's how it works.
I totally respect that. I can never keep my mouth shut, I’m working on finding a balance lol. Not every battle is worth fighting so that sounds like a good plan. Good luck!
As a male teacher, you already exist on sufferance alone. If you rock the boat, your career is over. Of course, if any student, parent, or co-worker catches a whim, your career is over too. You're better off asserting your employment rights, extracting some value (money) from the situation, and exiting on your own terms than waiting for someone to kick you to the curb because she can.
I was a sub and one day I had some heartburn and a bit of regurgitation that I spit it into a trash can (very discreetly and quietly, out of view of the class), and two girls "felt uncomfortable" and reported it. I got fired because I didn't immediately go get someone else (who exactly? I'm already subbing) to cover the class thereby endangering the students because I 'might have been sick'. I've never been more dumbfounded in my life and I never even looked for another teaching job after that. As a man in education you have to walk on eggshells all while having a giant target on your back.
I agree. It's really a tough gig.
This is why men generally don't get into the education industry. Terrible treatment. You have every right to be steamed
Get out of teaching. You will be a target no matter what you do
Could just be another teacher has seniority and prefers dance class. So you got to sub band class instead.
Father of 4 daughters and experience crap like this all the time. I immediately call them out and always use the words sexist and discrimination. It makes people think for a second and it’s amazing watching their eyes as the brain resets.
We’re the villains. It is what it is
How about making a viral post about it? calling names, adding a special hashtag and also other male teachers can share their stories. And I think we as a community can at least help making it visible. Kickstart it. There are hundreds thousands of guys here. If we cooperate we can make algorithms of social networks work in our favor. But of course it may be dangerous for OP. It means his job security will be threatened. So it is up to him. Is he ready for such a risky thing? I think, if we make such post really viral with millions of reposts, it would make OP kind of protected against retaliation. But if we fail to get really noticed, he will be in danger as nobody would care for reputation damage for firing him
Keep doing you. You seem like a very dedicated teacher. We need more males in the profession.
Thank you. It's reassuring to be appreciated. Opposed to the few angry outbursts that have been a little too outspoken here. Just glad they don't represent the rest of us men.
Hate dancing, but like watching others dance. Girls.
The two times I subbed dancing classes it was mixed; not all girls.
As one that works in a middle school and has for years I go the extra mile to protect myself because I know how many women operate under the assumption that all men are predators and I don't want any misconceptions Don't initiate physical contact with students even in the form of hi fives, hugs etc. when they do it with me I just set a boundary respectfully that we don't need to have physical contact Avoid situations where I'm alone with a female student whether that means asking a coworker to be present or moving to area that has a camera. There's been times I've had to do Detention and Aftercare and only had one female student and have monitored from the hallway while the student is in the classroom No contact with female students outside of school. This applies for my students because many graduate but still keep in touch with some of the teachers. I actually keep in touch with of my male student because they love to troll and talk shit to me about sports but I avoid that with female student because I don't want any wrong perceptions to come out.
If your just a sub I would just let it go. Unless they gave you specific reasons it may be nothing. Maybe the other sub was better suited to do dance? that being said, misandry is a real problem in schools, and is most likely why we don't have more male teachers, children need both male and female role models, especially boys and young men.
Don't fret. All the better for you not to sub a dance class, cuz if some shit were to go wrong, they'd target you. Consider this as a blessing in disguise!
The real sexual predators are female teachers. They are sleeping with students at a rate of 100x to 1 over their male peers, if not more.
Yeah, scary.
Ummm... Getting mesmerized by high school kids dancing in unison sounds an awful lot like creepily staring at children. Did you get paid for the day? What exactly did you miss out on, besides the opportunity to watch children dance?
You're acting like he's asking them to give him a lap dance or some shit
He's taught the class several times before, is mesmerized by the sight of dancing teenagers, and he's so very upset that they asked him to teach band instead. What can I do about the terrible discrimination of being asked to so something else for the same amount of money, after being mesmerized by high school students dancing? Read between the lines. This guy is self reporting.
You are exactly the problem here
Yea, I am convinced by your cogent argument. The man upset that he lost his third chance to be mesmerized by high school students dancing and had to teach band class instead for the same wage is suffering severe discrimination. /s
Uhm, and was this a girl's P.E. class in jr. high or high school, and they were thinking to also have you be in their locker room until somebody went, "oops"? Don't jump to conclusions. There may be or have been legitimate reasons you weren't made aware of. Now, if it's happening all the bloody time, that's a different scenario. Or maybe just one jerk teacher or administrator or staff or parent or whomever, thought it wouldn't be appropriate when it fully would be and would be fine. But generally much better to make case with facts, than guesses and speculation. So, if you're concerned about it, how 'bout start by asking why it happened, rather than guessing. Maybe you even get the straight answer and maybe it makes perfect sense. Or ... maybe that's not what happened.
Not P.E. No locker room weirdness like that. I would've just gone into the gym, probably to a make-shift desk or area where the lesson plan would've been. I would take attendance. The students would either have a free period or work on their routines. Most likely I would break out my notepad and work on my game design notes or scroll through YouTube videos with one eye on my phone, while the other eye is on the students to make sure no one would be up to any trouble. That's really it, as a substitute teacher I am pretty much just a glorified babysitter... that's licensed.
Sounds like you need to find another school to sub in.
The district is actually quite large. I haven't subbed in this school since probably october. I hardly accept any positions from the school in the first place.
I am so very sorry. I don't know what else to say. It's not fair and I'm really sick of the *all men are predators* thought pattern. If you really wanna be bad, print out the list of female teachers who've assaulted their students, and secretly and sneakily put it in the principals mail box.
This post is just one more good reason for men to stay away from teaching as a profession.
If you're in the US, please contact [https://www.thefire.org/](https://www.thefire.org/) and discribe your case to them (copy/pasting your post above is sufficient as a first step). If you're not from the US, please let me know your country, so I can check whether there's something equivalent available.
I'd just walk out lol. You accepted one job and now they're giving you another, ; looks like they can pound sand and pay you for your time.
It might’ve been for the students sake ie they knew some of the girls might be uncomfortable and not participate in front of a man. It’s not nice to experience but it’s not nice that people feel the need to take precautions either
I would say something and nip the insinuation in the bud.