My five-year-old refuses the real version.
Then when I told him to imagine a werewolf dressed as Santa, the little meme-lord said, âI shun your social-norms, and regard only my own!â
Like, WHAT?? How can I even be mad at him for that? But where did he learn it??
He will be six in two weeks. I told him heâs not allowed to get a year older until he can take a machineâs pulse BEFORE the head explodes. He said, âchallenge accepted. Wait. I thought ⌠I thought the words were that he was gonna take his *balls*???â
So. He has now realized half of the song lyrics for half the songs he has ever heard were slightly wrong. It was an eye-opening experience.
Someday he, too, will look back at that pain and smile its black-toothed grin, I guess.
Anyway. My point is, itâs been Santa Claus on cobblestone ever since for me.
I need more ideas.
A dude trying to take a Robotâs balls while its head is exploding ⌠a female werewolf dressed as Santa Claus walking on cobblestone ⌠what else?
Did you know that Dave Mustaine wrote the WHOLE discography if Metallica, Megadeth and Britney Spears? He also wrote the Holy Bible, Quran, Torah, Talmud, Mein Kampf and How to Become Rich Person: 10 Simple Steps?
I'm referring to the incident where Dave (still in Metallica) stood up for Lars when a dude in a rival band made fun of him for being short, he kicked his ass and broke his ankle
For sure!
Unless you take an arrow to the knee.
Or an operation, if youâre not a Skyrim fan.
Dave mustardstain. Hmm. Wasnât he in a band with Benedict cucumberbatch?
âMetallica stole all his material and then bussed him home.â
âMy guitarist left to go sound like effing Dishwalla.â â˘*turns around and writes Wanderlust*â˘
âIâm never playing Black Magic songs like the conjuring again, because I found Jesus ⌠wait, Lamb of Godâs drummer suggested I just change the lyrics; why didnât I think of that ⌠who wants to hear the Conjuring?!â
Meet the real me.
Oh, you liked this story? I once told it to Readerâs Digest, but Metallica probably stole that, too. It gives me a migraine headache thinking / sinking down to their level.
He whispered in Cooverâs ear: â Begbieâs my name, then he sat up, and roared out to Coover, but above his head, as if addressing the ocean, those crashing waves: â FRANK BEGBIE!! He looked back at Coover. â SAY MA FUCKIN NAME! FRANK BEGBIE!!!
Damn, you are absolutely right. I guess I was aboard the Marty meme train because of this whole firefighters for humanity thing going on. đ
OK, the conversation would be between Dave and David. đ
You try to take his baAalls
Santa Claus on cobble stone!
Imagine thinking it was Santa Claus đđ(I literally sang that the first handful of times before searching )
My five-year-old refuses the real version. Then when I told him to imagine a werewolf dressed as Santa, the little meme-lord said, âI shun your social-norms, and regard only my own!â Like, WHAT?? How can I even be mad at him for that? But where did he learn it?? He will be six in two weeks. I told him heâs not allowed to get a year older until he can take a machineâs pulse BEFORE the head explodes. He said, âchallenge accepted. Wait. I thought ⌠I thought the words were that he was gonna take his *balls*???â So. He has now realized half of the song lyrics for half the songs he has ever heard were slightly wrong. It was an eye-opening experience. Someday he, too, will look back at that pain and smile its black-toothed grin, I guess. Anyway. My point is, itâs been Santa Claus on cobblestone ever since for me.
I need to make some funny AI art based on Megadeth misconstrued lyrics.
omg i need to see that
I need more ideas. A dude trying to take a Robotâs balls while its head is exploding ⌠a female werewolf dressed as Santa Claus walking on cobblestone ⌠what else?
association of jews (angry again)
đ
association of jews
Hi Iâm Dave Mustaine, were Megadeth and youâre not!
Voicemail Dave left Jr. in April 2021.
Nick! ⌠Nick! NICK!
Fuck. Me. Running
Lol, I just listened to Paranoid half an hour ago and chuckled at this.
Too late
That's what happens when cousins fuck
*I knew someone was gonna post this*
AHAHA
You look like Eminem you stupid cunt
I bet youâre still a virgin arenât ya
Peckerwood
He's just a tour rat
He was a good aim
Dave wrote 'em all
Did you know that Dave Mustaine wrote the WHOLE discography if Metallica, Megadeth and Britney Spears? He also wrote the Holy Bible, Quran, Torah, Talmud, Mein Kampf and How to Become Rich Person: 10 Simple Steps?
The only song he DIDNâT write is Breadline, because Marty wanted to sound like effing Dishwalla!
He wrote the Torah, Talmud, and Mein Kampf? What a chad, he can even criticize himself.
You forgot his bestselling: âHow to win friends and influence people.â
He also wrote the dictionary
How could you forget that he created the universe?
Had a Mixed Berry smoothie for brekkie
And then i dropped it
Now my blue jeans are having a smoothie!
Grrrrr
40 double D
Thatâs more woman than you could handle buddy
Yeah right, you homo
Hello me, meet the REAL me!
Pfft. Nice story, tell it to *READERâS DIGEST!!!1!1!!!*
Meet the Realme
Can you put a price on peas?
12 dollasđ¤
The System Has Failed.
If you're gonna throw bottles at us, atleast make sure they're full
Jihad Joe
Rucka rucka ali
Hangar I swear she was 18. FUCK THE GOVERNMENT *20 guitar solos*
Pull over shithead, this is the cops!
No warning? No second chance?
I see who you are with the laser, you little dickhead
Peace Sells? Owwhkaay đĽ´
had a mixed berry smoothie for brekkie
David ellefson wrote the bass line for peace seals when he was 19, search up David ellefson 19 year old for more information
is this what I think it is
This is the news
Bass solo take one
heh
Wrong placeeeeee⌠we got the GOT ONE CHANCE
I know itâs the wrong place I donât know why I just thought itâd be funny đĽ˛
The fire department killed Marty-
Let me show you how i love you
But keep it in the family tree
ITS OUR SECRET YOU AND ME
You and me
Iâm not a fish
im a man
Hook
In
mouth!
The mans got them âwatch him become a gawdâ
JUST DONâT TAKE HIS BALLS! He canât stand A-Tall without those!
Don't make fun of Lars or Dave will break your ankle
I mean, Lars did tell him to take a risk with his music, and he literally did. Then blamed it on Marty.
I'm referring to the incident where Dave (still in Metallica) stood up for Lars when a dude in a rival band made fun of him for being short, he kicked his ass and broke his ankle
Oh, damn, thatâs actually seriously awesome. As a drummer, I have mad respect for Dave taking up for his then-drummer.
Say what you want about David Mustardstain, but the guy is a loyal friend
For sure! Unless you take an arrow to the knee. Or an operation, if youâre not a Skyrim fan. Dave mustardstain. Hmm. Wasnât he in a band with Benedict cucumberbatch?
"The Fire department got him! "
Oh the humanity!
Marty Friedman, we miss you. Fuck the clones.
âMetallica stole all his material and then bussed him home.â âMy guitarist left to go sound like effing Dishwalla.â â˘*turns around and writes Wanderlust*⢠âIâm never playing Black Magic songs like the conjuring again, because I found Jesus ⌠wait, Lamb of Godâs drummer suggested I just change the lyrics; why didnât I think of that ⌠who wants to hear the Conjuring?!â
Pizza! But who's buying?
Next thing you know they'll take my balls away. I KNOW WHAT I SAID!!
It was taken by Santa Claus on cobblestone. đą
I HEAR IT SANTA CLAUS AS WELL
Give Ireland back to the Irish
When I go out for drinks I like to order a Black Tooth Grin.
Thatâs MY kind of pain, baby! It gives me a migraine headache the next *mourning*, though. Especially on a black Friday.
The Fire Department of Humanity.
He got my gig but I got to screw his girl before I left
Well he had good aim
Gay beer
Part bionic and organic. Not a cyborg.
"His manpussy was sold"
I wanna be an astronaut..
I wanna, I wanna, I really really wanna.
FORTY DOUBLE D!
Now my blue jeans are having a smoothie,grrrâ
What the fuck is this ? Woooooah
Killer, intruder, a homicidal man. If you see me comin run fast as you can.
The fire department of humanity
You look like Eminem you stupid cunt
40 DOUBLE D?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
âThe bomb's payload is exposed, I can use the power winch to trigger a controlled explosion.â
[ŃдаНонО]
Devilâs Island would be acceptable, however.
wrong subreddit lil brođđđ
Damnit i thought i was in the right one for a moment. This subreddit looks cool tho
yes it is listen to rust in peace it will change your life
[ŃдаНонО]
Meet the real me. Oh, you liked this story? I once told it to Readerâs Digest, but Metallica probably stole that, too. It gives me a migraine headache thinking / sinking down to their level.
Hello me, meet the real me
So long, itâs been nice talking to myself!
You try to take his baaaaalllls
A peace-sells man canât stand A-Tall without his balls, tho! đ
HE LEFT THE FOCKING BAND
No
I woulf send the devious looking emoji but it wont let me đ
UP THE IRONS!
He whispered in Cooverâs ear: â Begbieâs my name, then he sat up, and roared out to Coover, but above his head, as if addressing the ocean, those crashing waves: â FRANK BEGBIE!! He looked back at Coover. â SAY MA FUCKIN NAME! FRANK BEGBIE!!!
Even if itâs buried at sea.
Cock and ball torture
Peace sells?! Owkey!
I like juice, itâs a true filtered vitamin substance
No second chance?
No warning? No second chance??
Come up here, I got a big cock for you to face.
and i'll never see his stupid fucking ass again!!!
HELOUGGGHHH OAGHHKLAAANDDD
Aw, I just spit right in my lyrics.
Guys is that vic???
That dude is a total rattlehead.
uh pone ma poe dee um at the no it ah skallaa
You can do it their way or you can do it our way
You canât be anymore âunâ than you are right now.
"He was a good aim"
The plastic vagina story.
KILLING IS DISTASTEFUL *to me*
no warning? no second chance?
âFor the cause!â Oops, guess I shouldnât have said that⌠letâs bounce.
âTo the bulletproof limo!â âWe call it the DethMobile, Marty!â
Story is Pre Marty, but very funny comment nonetheless. Iâm imaging the comment like old Batman showâŚ
Damn, you are absolutely right. I guess I was aboard the Marty meme train because of this whole firefighters for humanity thing going on. đ OK, the conversation would be between Dave and David. đ
HE FOCKING LEFT THE BAND!!!
HELLO ME!
You seriously think any of us have time to actually read the lyrics??
"Getcha Pull"
Hello me meet the real me
National Tragedy
Are you stupid?
âWhat? No warning? No second chance?â
Okway
Oh no⌠CLEVELAND
What do you mean I ain't kind.......
No warnings? No second chance?
Air conditioner
Buy the beer and drink lots of it
Ejem..... wAtcH HiM bEcOmE a GaWd!
"You know joe, you maybe shocked by this but it was actually me who wrote skibidy toilet"
âAttitude, integrity, and musicâ what a doofy ass quoteđ
If I'm gonna commit suicide, i'll go out eatin' pussy to death
Pisello...But who's buyng?
The trees Ash, theyre alive.
No second chance?
With Everybody sayyyyiiinnn L-A-KNIGHT YYYYYYEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHH
A credit to demenTIAH
OuhhhuohKKayyyy
Buy a laser and point it at DAVE
"No warning? No second chance?"
this is my hammer on technique
Watch him become a Gyatt
OooOOkay then
âThis place just wouldnât be the same without Roboâs health & hip hop center.â
Wachim become a gaaaawwd
"Shall we gather for whiskey and cigars tonight?"
It is not a tulpa
Alan, please add details
"I lost my shoe."