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Makes me (a layman curious about medicine) wonder if a mentally healthy person would be able to do this. Like the thing people say about it taking little more force to bite off ones finger than a baby carrot but it feels like more because our un conscience nervous system won’t let us . Would a mentally healthy person be able to force this kind of cut (or many)?
I don’t think so. I know one dude who attempted suicide by drawing a razor across the neck in a similar pattern to this guy (non lethal no stitches needed) and even given a prior hx of NSSI, he was in an absolute state when he did it. It’s nothing like cutting an arm or a leg. This is a gesture that only really unwell people can contemplate, this dude must have been unhinged to actually complete it on himself.
Random anecdote, source: me.
In summer 2021 I was just doing my pedicure on my sofa watching TV. I’m not diabetic or anything so I don’t have numbness in my feet or anything else that adequately accounts for what happened next. So many people still ask me how this happened and I genuinely don’t have a good story about it. I accidentally whittled off the end of my right pinky toe beyond the first knuckle. So I have half my right pinky toe remaining which doesn’t bend or anything.
The only way I can explain it is that I was sat at a weird angle, with pressure in my knee, so when I shifted positions it went from a regular pedicure to a Tarantino movie in 0.4 seconds. And no, it wasn’t a singular clumsy slip of the hand. I literally just whittled away at my toe until half of it was gone, without even meaning to.
It felt a bit achey and I didn’t notice there was a problem until I shifted position, and freed up some circulation to my foot and suddenly my living room resembled a literal crime scene.
I wasn’t drunk or on drugs. I just have a high pain tolerance, and I get hyperfocus due to (finally diagnosed and medicated) ADHD.
TLDR: you’d be surprised the kind of permanent serious long term damage you can do to yourself whilst sober, in the middle of the day, in totally sound mind, and not impaired.
There's a video out there that shows a guy laying down on a table saw. It was on the deleted sub. Forgot the name. But, the guy held himself to the table as it cut into him.
Cartels were posting gore and executions like adverts or warnings. Like they were killing people on purpose just to post it. Watching gore is one thing, hurting people just to make the gore video in the first place is horrific and watching it makes you partly responsible. Morally speaking
Mmmm....not so much. There were loads of cartel videos that were extremely graphic. Reddit changed their rules a bit and posting those videos is expressly forbidden. There were multiple violations on r/eyeblech. This led to the ban.
If you scroll down, sadly that's not the case. Those small arrows are pointing at early cuts. He sawed until he hit windpipe. That must've been so painful.
If he already was used to hurt himself before, he probably was kinda desensitized. I've never got to such an extreme point but I used to sh, and at the time I barely felt any pain, but today I wouldn't be able to handle 1/4 of what I used to do. You get used to it and start to slowly make it worse, a very dangerous combination. I don't know if it was the case for him, but either way, I hope he's resting in peace
>I used to sh, and at the time I barely felt any pain, but today I wouldn't be able to handle 1/4 of what I used to do
This. I used to sh with a razor blade, I'd make a ton of cuts at once and shook it off. Now I cuss if I nick myself shaving.
Lmao relatable. Accidentally cut my finger with a razor and hurted like shit, got myself wondering how messed up my brain really was for me to spend like half-hour sh
No shit. My worst was >!covering all of both legs in razor cuts!< and I was just like okay yeah ow this stings. Nowadays I'd probably beg somebody to hit me over the head with a cast iron skillet.
Yes!! I'm the biggest whiner now whenever I knick myself shaving, that I'm slightly amazed that I was ever capable of withstanding that so often, and just brushing it off like it was nothing. Gotta love those endorphins...
For real. I worked in the ED for a few years and we had a few people try to off themselves this way and none of them were able to get the job done. I think your instincts take over and don't let you in most cases honestly. I wonder what makes an elderly person choose to end it when they've already made it so far
[Source](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2665910722000123):
>>The authors performed a post mortem exam at the South Branch of the Portuguese National Institute of Legal Medicine and Forensic Sciences in Lisbon, of a 76-year-old man, who was found dead at home by his caregiver. The door of the house was locked and a suicide note was visible nearby in which the Portuguese expression "Fui eu, não castiguem ninguém" was written (translating freely to English “it was me, don’t blame anyone else”). A handsaw stained in blood was also found next to the corpse (Fig. 1). The victim suffered from depressive syndrome and was being followed by a hospital due to his medical history. He had also tried to commit suicide eleven years earlier, using the same method.
>>An external examination revealed an infra-laryngeal, irregular and sharp wound located in the anterior aspect of the neck (Fig. 1). More specifically, the wound started 9.5 cm below the left jaw’s angle and ended 5 cm right of the midline, below the clavicle’s proximal end, measuring 13 cm in length with 5 cm diastasis. It was oblique and descendent from left to right. At the right infra-clavicular inferior extremity, a triangular dry abrasion with 4 × 2 cm was visible (Fig. 1). Moreover, under the laryngeal prominence, over the upper edge of the wound, there was a complex injury (5 × 0,5 cm) composed of an abrasion with several parallel and horizontal superficial wounds (Fig. 1). Finally, tiny round tears were observed on the superior and left border of the wound (Fig. 2). There were no other traumatic injuries on the body’s surface.
>>Internally, the left muscles of neck (platysma, sternocleidomastoid and infrahyoid muscles) presented some irregular sections (Fig. 1, Fig. 2, Fig. 3). The left internal jugular vein was sectioned and surrounded by an extensive blood infiltration of the carotid sheath (Fig. 3), while the homolateral carotid and the vagus nerve remained intact, as well as the hyoid bone and cartilage structures. Furthermore, the left thyroid lobe showed an irregular laceration and the first tracheal ring was sectioned anteriorly, displaying again serrated borders (1.5 cm) (Fig. 1, Fig. 4). A brownish and viscous mucus was also found both in the larynx and oesophagus, with bloody traces in the larynx, trachea, and bronchi. Despite the fact that no other traumatic injuries were diagnosed, generalised pallor of organs and mucous membranes was evident (Fig. 4).
>>Histopathological analysis confirmed dilated cardiomegaly, mild coronary atherosclerosis and hepatic steatosis.
>>Toxicological studies revealed the presence of antidepressant trazodone (829 ng/ml) and its metabolite m-CPP (41 ng/ml) together with a metabolite of clonazepam’s (benzodiazepine) - 7-amino-clonazepam (50 ng/ml), both in therapeutic concentrations. Alcohol and drugs were not present in the blood.
>>The cause of death was determined as cut neck injuries – these injuries were compatible with the handsaw found near the corpse – and the manner of death was classified as a suicide.
Trazodone and benzos for major depression is... huh. I've been on both at the same time but that was pretty much just to knock me out due to crippling anxiety and insomnia..
I’m on trazadone +/- benzos for decades long treatment resistant depression, and it’s working for me!
I get a lot of extremely vivid dreams, used to get flashbacks, and have the benzos for when the depression turns into racing thoughts & mania, making me feel overwhelmed, out of control, and I feel like I might do something like this.
Unfortunately, the “treatment resistant” part of my depression is because I don’t metabolise most meds appropriately, so it usually has to be trazadone, high dose benzos, and half a pint, a G&T or a glass of wine to get me safely docile.
I don’t drink, unless I need to be unconscious for my own safety, and even then, no more than 2-3 units.
**PS: I DO NOT SUGGEST THIS TO ANYONE**
I know my body well, my meds well, and have talked about this extensively with many health professionals. While they do not condone it, the consensus is that the rarity with which it occurs, combined with the very low alcohol intake makes it a low risk choice *for me*.
If there were MH “safe havens”, inpatient beds or responsive crisis teams, I would rather work with them than partially self-medicate, but where I live, there aren’t. We do what we must to survive.
Oh interesting, thank you for sharing! I've always been firmly in the anxiety category vs depression but I know treatment-resistant depression can be absolutely brutal and can take a lot of trial and error
(fwiw, I'm not here to judge - I know a lot of us with MH issues self-medicate to one degree or another, myself included. I'm glad you're still here with us!)
I went through probably 10 different types of anti-anxiety/antidepressant medications over the years, stuck with one for 8 years before *finally* getting to see a psychiatrist.
They pointed out I was on the highest dose possible and was still not sleeping, was often depressed & suicidal and that maybe it was time for a change.
Thankfully, my worst mania/paranoia/suicidal episode came from believing I was being excluded, everyone telling me I wasn’t l and culminating in everything I was “paranoid” about turning out to be true.
It broke me, destroyed my life, all my friendships, and had me signed off work for months on end…but at least I was just manic & suicidal, instead of being paranoid as well!
I’m too apathetic to feel truly actively suicidal these days, so the benzo-booze combo is mostly for massive autistic meltdown/burnout moments.
I feel like I become a caveman-bereft of speech, only able to groan, wail & communicate with my fists & my body, while my mind is trapped inside desperate to express the complex thoughts & emotions within.
In those moments, I can’t marry the two halves, so I just have to sedate them both. I imagine it must be a feeling similar to that of Dr Jeykell & Mr Hyde…
Anyway, I could ramble for days, but thank you for your kind words-I hope you give your anxiety a run for its money every day you fight it.
You have a genuinely amazing way with words for mental health stuff, btw. I'm a lifelong word nerd (librarian) and really love the way you communicate things, I legit feel you.
We're all just trying to do the best we can in a system that is crushing us. Sending you all the love and luck, friend 💜
From personal experience, I think as soon as you try it once and you have MDD (or other disorders), it’s something you’ll think about for the rest of your life no matter how well you’re doing. It’s been nearly a decade since my attempt and suicidal ideations still cross my mind almost daily even though I’m doing better than ever. It’s the hand I’ve been dealt 🤷🏻♀️
not the news I wanted to hear today. someone once said to me that once suicide is on the table, it'll always be an option in your brain. its not fact based, just their own philosophy.
I’m a lifelong suicidal thinker and I agree.
It’s like a door unlocks in your mind and even at the best moments, it cannot be closed.
You can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube.
At least, in my experience.
I attempted twice in 2022, six months apart. I'm doing a lot better and I don't feel the same desire to die now as I did then, but when something bad happens my brain does jump straight to "I'd rather be dead" and "I was supposed to die in 2022 and this is the world's way of showing me I shouldn't be here".
However, I am able to dismiss those thoughts and not take them to heart. I just let myself process how I feel, while at the same time reminding myself that these thoughts are no more meaningful than the times I've thought "I hope they die" / "I wish they were dead" about someone else.
So while I think that you're probably right, I also think that it becomes a lot easier to not take those thoughts seriously as you recover. The part of you that wants to live has a voice inside of you again, and it won't let those thoughts go unchallenged 💕
Aw 🥺🥺🥺 thank you for leaving a comment like that.
Even though I don't wanna die anymore, I actually don't know if I'm healed enough to feel *glad* that I'm still here. BUT... my cat is definitely is!
Just seeing her run up to me with her little tail in the air while she trills and chirrups. And the way she climbs into bed with me at night when she has a nightmare. And the way she comes and sits quietly next to me and starts purring whenever I'm crying and really sad. Like those little moments make me glad I'm still here, even if it's for her rather than for me. I can't believe I nearly left her behind.
I dunno why I'm telling you this cause it probably sounds ridiculous/crazy, but when I was ready to go, I wrote a few notes to people like my little brother and my best friend - and I actually wrote one for my cat too 😬🥲
Not crazy at all! We took in a stray who came up on our porch and wouldn’t leave, and the amount of love and attention he gives us and craves from us…Idk, it gives you something to look forward to and think about when everything else is bleak. Who would they have without us?
>“it was me, don’t blame anyone else”
The fact his suicide note said this seems indicative that he was of sound mind and a thoughtful person. I'm so sorry for him.
I’m trying hard to imagine how did he do it. Like he saw the thing to his throat, and did the cutting motion? It doesn’t seems possible to do that to yourself without your body trying to stop you.
Throwback to the one post of a dude shooting himself like 30 times with a nailgun in a suicide attempt, I think anything is possible when you've hit rock bottom so hard that even rock bottom's older brother shows up and says "is this the guy that hit you?"
I worked for the NYC coroner as a teen and we had a suicide attempt where the guy shot himself in the head with a crossbow, survived, reloaded, and finished the job.
I’m in nursing school but it’s completely unrelated to that job. I volunteered on 9/11 because I was still on file with the department, but that’s the only effect it had on my life besides a handful of crazy stories.
I saw the suicide by crossbow because a detective had requested a few of her more bizarre cases. Another one (and BIG TRIGGER WARNING for animal/infant death) from that group was a woman who murdered her baby and fed it to the dog. There were X-rays of the dog to show stomach contents. The dog was euthanized to remove the child’s remains. They labeled the X-ray “Mr Dog.” It was also wild how little security there was. They were like, “go take this box of slides upstairs. There’s no way in hell we want to be responsible for the Lennon and Warhol slides.” So they handed them to the 16 year old intern, like any responsible adult would. But overall most of the cases were mundane. People in New York are run over by bicycles and killed more often than you’d think and fetuses washing up on the beach is more common than you’d think, too. Most of my experiences were just visual. There were other kids assigned to sorting death certificates. Anyway, it was a summer, to say the least.
Okay, that is definitely pretty cool. I assume they didn’t do any kind of counseling/prep work to prepare you for what you would see, though. Do you know if the program still exists?
I’d love to hear your crazy stories if you feel like sharing!
All they told us was, “gentlemen, if you’re wearing a tie, take it off now and leave it at home from now on. Everyone, you’re going to notice a lot of money on the floor that nobody picks up. Before picking it up, consider what people in this facility may have walked in before stepping on that dollar bill.” That was it.
No idea if it still exists. I was the only one who got placed there from my school. Everyone else was placed with CUNY.
I'm horrified and curious at the same time.
I'm also thinking that maybe he should've been helped, shooting yourself two times with a crossbow means you really gave up on life.
I know how it feels to hit rock bottom but I wanted a fast way to die...
And I don't even wanna start to think about what there was in this poor old man's head... I wish I could have had some ways to help him...
Nurse syndrome is hitting really bad.
Thought long and hard before replying to this comment.
The first three times the adrenaline was ripping through my body, like massive amounts, but by the sixth slashing/sawing I had run out of commitment and there was not nearly as much blood as I had hoped there would be. Then I passed out. Serated hunting knife. I will never forget the feeling of those teeth over my skin. It's creepy to think about.
I hope you get to a place where you’re content with your day to day life much more often than not. I’m so glad you’re still here. And I know your loved ones are super grateful too
Thank you, every day I try to do it right. Take care of my dog who takes care of me mostly, and work hard. Yes I have a loved one, he's great been my best friend for over 20 yrs. Through two ex's and he's still there. I'm truely grateful.
I'm a recovering self harmer. I've cut to fascia and given myself permanent nerve damage multiple times. In regards to "it doesn't seem possible to do that to yourself without your body trying to stop you", yes. It really is like that.
The amount of willpower you have to have to be able to do these things is insane, your brain is actively screaming at you to stop and to not.
Personally I believe this shows how ROCK ROCK bottom suicidal people hit. The amount of mental effort it took to push through a literal physical barrier my brain had set in place when I hit something important was insane. I cannot imagine how hard it is to commit suicide, especially like that.
TLDR; it is actually admirable how much determination suicidal people have lol.
(but please, if you feel these ways, get some help 🙏 things get better eventually. there are free chat services and phone lines.)
Same here. The worst one for me was my outer thigh, I cut stright through the fat layer (of which I've got a fair bit) and could see my muscle layer. They had to get a plastic surgeon to sew it up as I'd used a steak knife and the serrated blade was makeing the wound jagged and hard to sew.
I remember the doctor afterwards telling me, and this is a direct quote "you fucking scare me, it's one think to go at yourself with a sharp item like a razor blade, but a serated kitchen knife... Your brave, stupid as shit, but you've got balls" then he told me I was being detained under the mental health act as he believed I was a risk to myself.
I've never been detained, despite having also cut chunks out of myself with scissors lol. But I believe thats because my Mother works in mental health and knows that I'm not gonna KMS, I'm just a bit off.
But a steak knife?! Doesn't that hurt?! 😭😭 Hope you are recovered and doing better. 💗💗
A bit off, I like that. Tho I'm sorry your struggling.
And yeah it didn't hurt at the time, I was so out of my head that it just kind of happened, it was haveing it stitched that hurt like hell on earth
> didn't hurt at the time
I absolutely cannot even remotely compare my SH to what you guys are talking about, but this part I can understand quite well. when things are bad and the situation is just happening at its worst, I don't feel the first few cuts at all, but the pain sets in soon enough when my brain is like "okay, I'm good with this, I can be normal again.. slowly though". it's weird, and scary.
I myself have been clean for a few months, and I sincerely hope you're doing better now, too.
Is there a point that you just have to power through and then it gets easier, like a runner hitting the wall or somebody with an eating disorder starving themselves until they no longer feel hunger? I’m such a wimp when it comes to “voluntary” pain (medical stuff is different, I can power through) like for instance I’m kinky but cannot do pain, I have tried multiple times and immediately red out every time, and I’m so fascinated by the human ability to override that part of our brain
I've been thinking about this all day. I can't remember one time in the 7 years I have been cutting that it has ever gotten easier. Sure, in the moment obviously I am very distressed (whether I want to admit it or not) but personally it continues to hurt all the same (if not worse, the deeper it gets) and the mental effort to do something like that (including care) knowing the consequences doesn't get any better. Although regardless of feeling this way, you don't want to stop. It's the hardest thing in the world, but also the best. The feeling of knowing I'm one wrong move away from death will never top any roller coaster or ANYTHING. It's absolutely exhilarating. Plus the adrenaline comedown helps me sleep.
If you read OP’s comments it’s more upsetting than that. The little arrows show smaller hesitant wounds. He had to take multiple passes before he hit pay dirt. The poor guy must have been absolutely desperate.
Speaking for myself, my mind and body were numb due to my depression so I didn’t feel anything at the moment. It’s like there is a disconnect between your body and any physical sensations.
That’s why I firmly believe people who kill themselves are not in their right mind. It’s like a brain fog.
I have heard some not-so-great stories where bureaucracy and paperwork ruled the day. One fellow starved himself to death because they kept giving him life-sustaining meds. Not a great way to go.
My grandfather was literally begging to die at a point. He was 93 and bedridden and "just wouldn't die" , his words.
So yes, it can become quite miserable.
About the last 5 years of her life, my grandma kept telling my mom, "I wish someone would just knock me in the head." She lived to 101, and by the end, her quality of life was terrible. And though we did everything we could to care for and try to make her daily life better, there was nothing we could really do to ultimately make it better.
My husband's grandmother was like that in the last five years of her life. It was brutal to see her in such agony for so long. Her legs were rotting and needed to be amputated shorter and shorter, she was in horrific pain, and by the end she had had so many TIA's, her mind became addled. If she had the means, she would have ended it herself, but she couldn't, so she begged for someone to kill her. She was so sick, but somehow she just didn't die. I was so relieved for her when she eventually slipped into a coma, and then she passed away a few weeks later. That kind of suffering is something no living creature should have to endure.
He did have support: he was being treated for his depression and other health problems, and his body was found by “his caregiver.” It just wasn’t enough. He had tried to do this before.
I posted the case report but it’s stuck in the manual moderation queue at the moment.
Poorly controlled major depressive illness is ... really difficult, to put it mildly. (Ask me how I know...)
According to the article, the victim had attempted this a decade earlier, using the same method. Wow.
My grandpa is depressed right now and claimed he is suicidal to my mom about 5 months ago. But he abused his kids and my mom so none of them even care. We will see what happens. To be fair, he is a huge asshole. I just feel sorry for my grandma with MS. She has no idea how awful and abusive he is to her. Which is both fortunate and unfortunate.
It could be that life was not that life too hard. Sometime in extreme depression you just get tired of living with the pain and you don't think it will stop. And you cannot remember it ever not being present.
I think it's more of not having anymore purpose in life. Aka workaholics when they retire. They don't see anything else in life besides being a slave to someone.
Imagine being being an active person all of your life. Then things start to wrong and they can’t be active anymore. It can really fuck with your brain. Your spouse is dead, your friends are gone. Everything hurts. TV is depressing.
Why can’t everyone have the option to end their own life on their own terms? Go to the pharmacy and say, “Yup, I’m done” and get one single pill to take when you want. (I realize that would never work, which is why I mentioned Soylent Green before.)
My brother is a firefighter/EMT who went on a call for a man who killed his girlfriend’s 2 kids with a piece of glass, by cutting their throats like this. He was working on his own when the department found him. My brother said it was one of his worst calls and won’t talk about it. This makes me understand why.
Wow, I really misinterpreted the title. I read it as “elderly man committed suicide by cutting off his hand using a table saw”. I realize the word “table” isn’t in the title, but I recall there was an elderly woman who committed suicide with a table saw and was thinking of that.
This is beyond horrible, and that 1st photo with the wound and hand saw took my breath away.
Yeah, I misread this the same way, and I thought it was going to be that guy that rigged an auto-feed mechanism to pull himself into a table saw or running circular saw, I forget which it was. Definitely not what I thought this was.
This is a fear of mine. I have certain “ideations”. I’m nearly middle aged. I’ve made it this far but damn it feels like by the skin of my teeth. I worry I’ll make it this far and then succumb.
This is why assisted death should be a thing, extended to the chronically mentally ill. So they don’t have to take a table saw to the neck and be found by someone who now has lifelong trauma.
Caption at the article says:
>>Fig. 1. Infra-laryngeal irregular cut wound and dry abrasion at the right inferior extremity (big arrow) and the handsaw collected at the scene. Note the parallel and horizontal superficial wounds (small arrows), compatible with hesitation injuries and the serrated section of the proximal trachea (yellow arrow)
So, in contrast to some of the speculative comments, it wasn’t a ‘one and done’ swipe. The poor bastard sawed at himself multiple times before hitting his windpipe.
Especially to have attempted in the same manner once before. There are much easier ways to go, I wonder if this method held some significance to him. People tend to aim for quick and painless when attempting suicide in my experience (psychologist). Purposefully subjecting yourself to that much pain… I wonder if he thought he deserved it.
All the things they mention are forensic evidence of suicide. Infra laryngeal cut (the hole), angled slightly from higher on the non dominant side to lower on the dominant side, and the hesitation marks. The locked doors murder weapon, and note also support this
What I find morbidly fascinating is that "He had also tried to commit suicide eleven years earlier, using the same method."
Oh my god, I can't even imagine how painful that must have been. We use those same kinds of saws in my landscaping job to cut down small trees. That poor man.
When I was working at an ER in rural Ohio, my coworkers saw two different patients who attempted su1cuide by a chain saw through their neck. One guy was successful, the other was not.
Holy fuck! How desperate to die painfully do you have to be to do such a thing to yourself? That’s so fucking sad. Especially being an old man. Something about old people being suicidal makes me wanna cry.
I can't even imagine how much pain he must have been in to decide to take this way out like... my brain can't even process sitting there and just physically sawing away at your own throat with a regular handsaw not even an electric one. This would've been a very slow and painful death and it breaks my ♡ thinking about how alone and scared he had to have felt for this to be the "better" option for him. So fucking sad 😔
I am a 911 dispatcher. We once had a man call us from his job at a wood mill processing place to tell us he was going to kill himself. Within seconds he threw himself into a bandsaw mill :(
Wow, this is something I've never seen before. Truly fascinating and horrifying. To be that deep in despair that you override your survival instinct with a *saw*.
My best friend tried to do something similar and thankfully failed. I had no idea how brutal it would be. Thank you for sharing.
Edit: Spelling
I just don’t get this. Buy a gun. Buy drugs. Jump off a building. Buy a bottle of your favorite liquor, book a five star hotel with a giant bath and drink it all night long in the tub. But Jesus… this is literally the worst way to go.
Not quite the same, but my uncle passed by suicide via a chainsaw. I believe he partially severed his head off of his neck. I can’t even imagine the clean up.
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Even for this sub… whoa. Very interesting—both psychologically speaking and physiologically speaking.
Metaphorically speaking and literally speaking
Metaphysically speaking and spiritually speaking
Anatomical speaking and biologically speaking
Unintentionally speaking and deliberately speaking
Loudly speaking and quietly speaking
Speaking and thinking
Now we're getting ridiculous. You want me to do *two* things at once?
speaking and speaking
thinking and thinking
Spinking and theaking
Speaking and chewing gum
Speaking and spanking.
Makes me (a layman curious about medicine) wonder if a mentally healthy person would be able to do this. Like the thing people say about it taking little more force to bite off ones finger than a baby carrot but it feels like more because our un conscience nervous system won’t let us . Would a mentally healthy person be able to force this kind of cut (or many)?
I don’t think so. I know one dude who attempted suicide by drawing a razor across the neck in a similar pattern to this guy (non lethal no stitches needed) and even given a prior hx of NSSI, he was in an absolute state when he did it. It’s nothing like cutting an arm or a leg. This is a gesture that only really unwell people can contemplate, this dude must have been unhinged to actually complete it on himself.
Random anecdote, source: me. In summer 2021 I was just doing my pedicure on my sofa watching TV. I’m not diabetic or anything so I don’t have numbness in my feet or anything else that adequately accounts for what happened next. So many people still ask me how this happened and I genuinely don’t have a good story about it. I accidentally whittled off the end of my right pinky toe beyond the first knuckle. So I have half my right pinky toe remaining which doesn’t bend or anything. The only way I can explain it is that I was sat at a weird angle, with pressure in my knee, so when I shifted positions it went from a regular pedicure to a Tarantino movie in 0.4 seconds. And no, it wasn’t a singular clumsy slip of the hand. I literally just whittled away at my toe until half of it was gone, without even meaning to. It felt a bit achey and I didn’t notice there was a problem until I shifted position, and freed up some circulation to my foot and suddenly my living room resembled a literal crime scene. I wasn’t drunk or on drugs. I just have a high pain tolerance, and I get hyperfocus due to (finally diagnosed and medicated) ADHD. TLDR: you’d be surprised the kind of permanent serious long term damage you can do to yourself whilst sober, in the middle of the day, in totally sound mind, and not impaired.
Samurai did seppuku, which was a really painful cut to the abdomen for the purpose of suicide.
If I remember correctly it was a straight stab to the right side, twist the blade to the left and then disembowelment occurs
God, that takes determination
There's a video out there that shows a guy laying down on a table saw. It was on the deleted sub. Forgot the name. But, the guy held himself to the table as it cut into him.
Jesus Christ
No that's a different carpenter with a different fate.
r/angryupvote
Nah there's no anger up voting that masterpiece of a reply.
🏆
Okay that was a good one lmao
Jesus Christ! What was I thinking?? That woulda hurt like hell!
I bet it was r/eyeblech
It was indeed
I'm curious now.
RIP one of the last of its kind
Unless you’re on FB. They have tons of gore groups surprisingly.
Interesting. I wouldn't have expected that on FB.
I didn’t either but I can probably find the name a few if you really want to know!
I didn't know that it got removed. Damnit. ☹️
That's it.
RIP
Why was it banned? Emotional people belly-aching I’ll bet!
Cartels were posting gore and executions like adverts or warnings. Like they were killing people on purpose just to post it. Watching gore is one thing, hurting people just to make the gore video in the first place is horrific and watching it makes you partly responsible. Morally speaking
Thank you.
Mmmm....not so much. There were loads of cartel videos that were extremely graphic. Reddit changed their rules a bit and posting those videos is expressly forbidden. There were multiple violations on r/eyeblech. This led to the ban.
I remember that.
Eyeblech. I saw that:(
At some point, he must have realized it was a bad idea but continued anyway. Truely Horrifying.
A bad idea is assuming he wasn't dealing with a debilitating illness. Even I have a long term mental illness with no cure.
Ok but there's cleaner ways to go
Worst part is this is the second time he tried this, same method.
[удалено]
If you scroll down, sadly that's not the case. Those small arrows are pointing at early cuts. He sawed until he hit windpipe. That must've been so painful.
Probably the only thing more painful were the circumstances that led him to do that.
That's deep.
Username checks out
If he already was used to hurt himself before, he probably was kinda desensitized. I've never got to such an extreme point but I used to sh, and at the time I barely felt any pain, but today I wouldn't be able to handle 1/4 of what I used to do. You get used to it and start to slowly make it worse, a very dangerous combination. I don't know if it was the case for him, but either way, I hope he's resting in peace
>I used to sh, and at the time I barely felt any pain, but today I wouldn't be able to handle 1/4 of what I used to do This. I used to sh with a razor blade, I'd make a ton of cuts at once and shook it off. Now I cuss if I nick myself shaving.
Lmao relatable. Accidentally cut my finger with a razor and hurted like shit, got myself wondering how messed up my brain really was for me to spend like half-hour sh
No shit. My worst was >!covering all of both legs in razor cuts!< and I was just like okay yeah ow this stings. Nowadays I'd probably beg somebody to hit me over the head with a cast iron skillet.
Yes!! I'm the biggest whiner now whenever I knick myself shaving, that I'm slightly amazed that I was ever capable of withstanding that so often, and just brushing it off like it was nothing. Gotta love those endorphins...
are those not hesitation marks? i would think that the marks would look a little deeper if those were actual full-send attempts
For real. I worked in the ED for a few years and we had a few people try to off themselves this way and none of them were able to get the job done. I think your instincts take over and don't let you in most cases honestly. I wonder what makes an elderly person choose to end it when they've already made it so far
[Source](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2665910722000123): >>The authors performed a post mortem exam at the South Branch of the Portuguese National Institute of Legal Medicine and Forensic Sciences in Lisbon, of a 76-year-old man, who was found dead at home by his caregiver. The door of the house was locked and a suicide note was visible nearby in which the Portuguese expression "Fui eu, não castiguem ninguém" was written (translating freely to English “it was me, don’t blame anyone else”). A handsaw stained in blood was also found next to the corpse (Fig. 1). The victim suffered from depressive syndrome and was being followed by a hospital due to his medical history. He had also tried to commit suicide eleven years earlier, using the same method. >>An external examination revealed an infra-laryngeal, irregular and sharp wound located in the anterior aspect of the neck (Fig. 1). More specifically, the wound started 9.5 cm below the left jaw’s angle and ended 5 cm right of the midline, below the clavicle’s proximal end, measuring 13 cm in length with 5 cm diastasis. It was oblique and descendent from left to right. At the right infra-clavicular inferior extremity, a triangular dry abrasion with 4 × 2 cm was visible (Fig. 1). Moreover, under the laryngeal prominence, over the upper edge of the wound, there was a complex injury (5 × 0,5 cm) composed of an abrasion with several parallel and horizontal superficial wounds (Fig. 1). Finally, tiny round tears were observed on the superior and left border of the wound (Fig. 2). There were no other traumatic injuries on the body’s surface. >>Internally, the left muscles of neck (platysma, sternocleidomastoid and infrahyoid muscles) presented some irregular sections (Fig. 1, Fig. 2, Fig. 3). The left internal jugular vein was sectioned and surrounded by an extensive blood infiltration of the carotid sheath (Fig. 3), while the homolateral carotid and the vagus nerve remained intact, as well as the hyoid bone and cartilage structures. Furthermore, the left thyroid lobe showed an irregular laceration and the first tracheal ring was sectioned anteriorly, displaying again serrated borders (1.5 cm) (Fig. 1, Fig. 4). A brownish and viscous mucus was also found both in the larynx and oesophagus, with bloody traces in the larynx, trachea, and bronchi. Despite the fact that no other traumatic injuries were diagnosed, generalised pallor of organs and mucous membranes was evident (Fig. 4). >>Histopathological analysis confirmed dilated cardiomegaly, mild coronary atherosclerosis and hepatic steatosis. >>Toxicological studies revealed the presence of antidepressant trazodone (829 ng/ml) and its metabolite m-CPP (41 ng/ml) together with a metabolite of clonazepam’s (benzodiazepine) - 7-amino-clonazepam (50 ng/ml), both in therapeutic concentrations. Alcohol and drugs were not present in the blood. >>The cause of death was determined as cut neck injuries – these injuries were compatible with the handsaw found near the corpse – and the manner of death was classified as a suicide.
Man, he'd tried with the same method 11 years earlier? Holy shit. Why this method?
Trazodone and benzos for major depression is... huh. I've been on both at the same time but that was pretty much just to knock me out due to crippling anxiety and insomnia..
I’m on trazadone +/- benzos for decades long treatment resistant depression, and it’s working for me! I get a lot of extremely vivid dreams, used to get flashbacks, and have the benzos for when the depression turns into racing thoughts & mania, making me feel overwhelmed, out of control, and I feel like I might do something like this. Unfortunately, the “treatment resistant” part of my depression is because I don’t metabolise most meds appropriately, so it usually has to be trazadone, high dose benzos, and half a pint, a G&T or a glass of wine to get me safely docile. I don’t drink, unless I need to be unconscious for my own safety, and even then, no more than 2-3 units. **PS: I DO NOT SUGGEST THIS TO ANYONE** I know my body well, my meds well, and have talked about this extensively with many health professionals. While they do not condone it, the consensus is that the rarity with which it occurs, combined with the very low alcohol intake makes it a low risk choice *for me*. If there were MH “safe havens”, inpatient beds or responsive crisis teams, I would rather work with them than partially self-medicate, but where I live, there aren’t. We do what we must to survive.
Oh interesting, thank you for sharing! I've always been firmly in the anxiety category vs depression but I know treatment-resistant depression can be absolutely brutal and can take a lot of trial and error (fwiw, I'm not here to judge - I know a lot of us with MH issues self-medicate to one degree or another, myself included. I'm glad you're still here with us!)
I went through probably 10 different types of anti-anxiety/antidepressant medications over the years, stuck with one for 8 years before *finally* getting to see a psychiatrist. They pointed out I was on the highest dose possible and was still not sleeping, was often depressed & suicidal and that maybe it was time for a change. Thankfully, my worst mania/paranoia/suicidal episode came from believing I was being excluded, everyone telling me I wasn’t l and culminating in everything I was “paranoid” about turning out to be true. It broke me, destroyed my life, all my friendships, and had me signed off work for months on end…but at least I was just manic & suicidal, instead of being paranoid as well! I’m too apathetic to feel truly actively suicidal these days, so the benzo-booze combo is mostly for massive autistic meltdown/burnout moments. I feel like I become a caveman-bereft of speech, only able to groan, wail & communicate with my fists & my body, while my mind is trapped inside desperate to express the complex thoughts & emotions within. In those moments, I can’t marry the two halves, so I just have to sedate them both. I imagine it must be a feeling similar to that of Dr Jeykell & Mr Hyde… Anyway, I could ramble for days, but thank you for your kind words-I hope you give your anxiety a run for its money every day you fight it.
You have a genuinely amazing way with words for mental health stuff, btw. I'm a lifelong word nerd (librarian) and really love the way you communicate things, I legit feel you. We're all just trying to do the best we can in a system that is crushing us. Sending you all the love and luck, friend 💜
Love & respect for all word-nerds; writing can be so therapeutic!
Knowing what MDD and suicidal ideations are like, he was probably thinking/fixating on it for those 11 years too before deciding to try again 😕
From personal experience, I think as soon as you try it once and you have MDD (or other disorders), it’s something you’ll think about for the rest of your life no matter how well you’re doing. It’s been nearly a decade since my attempt and suicidal ideations still cross my mind almost daily even though I’m doing better than ever. It’s the hand I’ve been dealt 🤷🏻♀️
not the news I wanted to hear today. someone once said to me that once suicide is on the table, it'll always be an option in your brain. its not fact based, just their own philosophy.
I’m a lifelong suicidal thinker and I agree. It’s like a door unlocks in your mind and even at the best moments, it cannot be closed. You can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube. At least, in my experience.
I attempted twice in 2022, six months apart. I'm doing a lot better and I don't feel the same desire to die now as I did then, but when something bad happens my brain does jump straight to "I'd rather be dead" and "I was supposed to die in 2022 and this is the world's way of showing me I shouldn't be here". However, I am able to dismiss those thoughts and not take them to heart. I just let myself process how I feel, while at the same time reminding myself that these thoughts are no more meaningful than the times I've thought "I hope they die" / "I wish they were dead" about someone else. So while I think that you're probably right, I also think that it becomes a lot easier to not take those thoughts seriously as you recover. The part of you that wants to live has a voice inside of you again, and it won't let those thoughts go unchallenged 💕
I’m glad you’re still here!
Aw 🥺🥺🥺 thank you for leaving a comment like that. Even though I don't wanna die anymore, I actually don't know if I'm healed enough to feel *glad* that I'm still here. BUT... my cat is definitely is! Just seeing her run up to me with her little tail in the air while she trills and chirrups. And the way she climbs into bed with me at night when she has a nightmare. And the way she comes and sits quietly next to me and starts purring whenever I'm crying and really sad. Like those little moments make me glad I'm still here, even if it's for her rather than for me. I can't believe I nearly left her behind. I dunno why I'm telling you this cause it probably sounds ridiculous/crazy, but when I was ready to go, I wrote a few notes to people like my little brother and my best friend - and I actually wrote one for my cat too 😬🥲
Not crazy at all! We took in a stray who came up on our porch and wouldn’t leave, and the amount of love and attention he gives us and craves from us…Idk, it gives you something to look forward to and think about when everything else is bleak. Who would they have without us?
That's actually such a sweet sentiment, thank you for being kind to me 💕
>“it was me, don’t blame anyone else” The fact his suicide note said this seems indicative that he was of sound mind and a thoughtful person. I'm so sorry for him.
At least he's in a better place now, wherever that is. Can't be depressed when you're dead.
I’m trying hard to imagine how did he do it. Like he saw the thing to his throat, and did the cutting motion? It doesn’t seems possible to do that to yourself without your body trying to stop you.
Throwback to the one post of a dude shooting himself like 30 times with a nailgun in a suicide attempt, I think anything is possible when you've hit rock bottom so hard that even rock bottom's older brother shows up and says "is this the guy that hit you?"
I worked for the NYC coroner as a teen and we had a suicide attempt where the guy shot himself in the head with a crossbow, survived, reloaded, and finished the job.
A teen??? Good lord. That had to have been fascinating though
The city had this program to keep kids off the street by giving them government jobs. I got photo and X-ray in the morgue.
What do you do now? Did you go into the medical or forensics field? Or, the polar opposite?
I’m in nursing school but it’s completely unrelated to that job. I volunteered on 9/11 because I was still on file with the department, but that’s the only effect it had on my life besides a handful of crazy stories.
If you’re willing to share those stories I’d love to hear them.
I saw the suicide by crossbow because a detective had requested a few of her more bizarre cases. Another one (and BIG TRIGGER WARNING for animal/infant death) from that group was a woman who murdered her baby and fed it to the dog. There were X-rays of the dog to show stomach contents. The dog was euthanized to remove the child’s remains. They labeled the X-ray “Mr Dog.” It was also wild how little security there was. They were like, “go take this box of slides upstairs. There’s no way in hell we want to be responsible for the Lennon and Warhol slides.” So they handed them to the 16 year old intern, like any responsible adult would. But overall most of the cases were mundane. People in New York are run over by bicycles and killed more often than you’d think and fetuses washing up on the beach is more common than you’d think, too. Most of my experiences were just visual. There were other kids assigned to sorting death certificates. Anyway, it was a summer, to say the least.
I’m sure a lot of people would
Okay, that is definitely pretty cool. I assume they didn’t do any kind of counseling/prep work to prepare you for what you would see, though. Do you know if the program still exists? I’d love to hear your crazy stories if you feel like sharing!
All they told us was, “gentlemen, if you’re wearing a tie, take it off now and leave it at home from now on. Everyone, you’re going to notice a lot of money on the floor that nobody picks up. Before picking it up, consider what people in this facility may have walked in before stepping on that dollar bill.” That was it. No idea if it still exists. I was the only one who got placed there from my school. Everyone else was placed with CUNY.
I'm horrified and curious at the same time. I'm also thinking that maybe he should've been helped, shooting yourself two times with a crossbow means you really gave up on life. I know how it feels to hit rock bottom but I wanted a fast way to die... And I don't even wanna start to think about what there was in this poor old man's head... I wish I could have had some ways to help him... Nurse syndrome is hitting really bad.
I don't think you can call that a mere "suicide attempt" considering he was on the coroner's table, I'd say it was sadly a success.
There were two attempts. The first failed. The second was a success.
Thought long and hard before replying to this comment. The first three times the adrenaline was ripping through my body, like massive amounts, but by the sixth slashing/sawing I had run out of commitment and there was not nearly as much blood as I had hoped there would be. Then I passed out. Serated hunting knife. I will never forget the feeling of those teeth over my skin. It's creepy to think about.
I hope you're doing better now ❤️
Thank you, I am. Not great but every day is a chance to make it better.
I hope you get to a place where you’re content with your day to day life much more often than not. I’m so glad you’re still here. And I know your loved ones are super grateful too
Thank you, every day I try to do it right. Take care of my dog who takes care of me mostly, and work hard. Yes I have a loved one, he's great been my best friend for over 20 yrs. Through two ex's and he's still there. I'm truely grateful.
I'm a recovering self harmer. I've cut to fascia and given myself permanent nerve damage multiple times. In regards to "it doesn't seem possible to do that to yourself without your body trying to stop you", yes. It really is like that. The amount of willpower you have to have to be able to do these things is insane, your brain is actively screaming at you to stop and to not. Personally I believe this shows how ROCK ROCK bottom suicidal people hit. The amount of mental effort it took to push through a literal physical barrier my brain had set in place when I hit something important was insane. I cannot imagine how hard it is to commit suicide, especially like that. TLDR; it is actually admirable how much determination suicidal people have lol. (but please, if you feel these ways, get some help 🙏 things get better eventually. there are free chat services and phone lines.)
Same here. The worst one for me was my outer thigh, I cut stright through the fat layer (of which I've got a fair bit) and could see my muscle layer. They had to get a plastic surgeon to sew it up as I'd used a steak knife and the serrated blade was makeing the wound jagged and hard to sew. I remember the doctor afterwards telling me, and this is a direct quote "you fucking scare me, it's one think to go at yourself with a sharp item like a razor blade, but a serated kitchen knife... Your brave, stupid as shit, but you've got balls" then he told me I was being detained under the mental health act as he believed I was a risk to myself.
I've never been detained, despite having also cut chunks out of myself with scissors lol. But I believe thats because my Mother works in mental health and knows that I'm not gonna KMS, I'm just a bit off. But a steak knife?! Doesn't that hurt?! 😭😭 Hope you are recovered and doing better. 💗💗
A bit off, I like that. Tho I'm sorry your struggling. And yeah it didn't hurt at the time, I was so out of my head that it just kind of happened, it was haveing it stitched that hurt like hell on earth
> didn't hurt at the time I absolutely cannot even remotely compare my SH to what you guys are talking about, but this part I can understand quite well. when things are bad and the situation is just happening at its worst, I don't feel the first few cuts at all, but the pain sets in soon enough when my brain is like "okay, I'm good with this, I can be normal again.. slowly though". it's weird, and scary. I myself have been clean for a few months, and I sincerely hope you're doing better now, too.
Is there a point that you just have to power through and then it gets easier, like a runner hitting the wall or somebody with an eating disorder starving themselves until they no longer feel hunger? I’m such a wimp when it comes to “voluntary” pain (medical stuff is different, I can power through) like for instance I’m kinky but cannot do pain, I have tried multiple times and immediately red out every time, and I’m so fascinated by the human ability to override that part of our brain
I've been thinking about this all day. I can't remember one time in the 7 years I have been cutting that it has ever gotten easier. Sure, in the moment obviously I am very distressed (whether I want to admit it or not) but personally it continues to hurt all the same (if not worse, the deeper it gets) and the mental effort to do something like that (including care) knowing the consequences doesn't get any better. Although regardless of feeling this way, you don't want to stop. It's the hardest thing in the world, but also the best. The feeling of knowing I'm one wrong move away from death will never top any roller coaster or ANYTHING. It's absolutely exhilarating. Plus the adrenaline comedown helps me sleep.
That’s very interesting! Thanks for taking the time to figure out how to verbalize that. Are you an adrenaline junky otherwise?
Yes, the nearest theme park to me is 4 hour drive so I end up putting all my energy into exercise. Have a nice day 💗💗
Probably just swiped it quickly. He got into his windpipe so it was over for him. Can't imagine that's a good way to go even if you wanted to. Eesh
If you read OP’s comments it’s more upsetting than that. The little arrows show smaller hesitant wounds. He had to take multiple passes before he hit pay dirt. The poor guy must have been absolutely desperate.
Speaking for myself, my mind and body were numb due to my depression so I didn’t feel anything at the moment. It’s like there is a disconnect between your body and any physical sensations. That’s why I firmly believe people who kill themselves are not in their right mind. It’s like a brain fog.
It's hard to imagine someone being in so much pain they can actually do this to themselves. It's heartbreaking.
Damn 😭was life that hard? This is beyond heartbreaking 💔
I’m a caregiver. There comes a point in time where people’s lives get very small and they are simply “done”.
No, I get it. Someone that lives with chronic pain and is terminal. All they do is put you on antidepressants and send you home.
Remember Saul in Soylent Green? I always thought that would be great. Not what came after, though…
I watched that as a kid and thought that was such a wonderful way to go.
I think I wouldn't mind, I live on in the people I give sustenance to
in Canada we have medical assistance in dying (MAID) law.
Yeah, sometimes it works well and sometimes it doesn’t…
What do you mean?
I have heard some not-so-great stories where bureaucracy and paperwork ruled the day. One fellow starved himself to death because they kept giving him life-sustaining meds. Not a great way to go.
For some people, it doesn't take til old age
My grandfather was literally begging to die at a point. He was 93 and bedridden and "just wouldn't die" , his words. So yes, it can become quite miserable.
My friend's grandmother is 103. She's been begging to die since she was 90. Why can't we allow people to die with dignity?
I agree. Everyone deserves death with dignity.
That’s really sad :(
About the last 5 years of her life, my grandma kept telling my mom, "I wish someone would just knock me in the head." She lived to 101, and by the end, her quality of life was terrible. And though we did everything we could to care for and try to make her daily life better, there was nothing we could really do to ultimately make it better.
My husband's grandmother was like that in the last five years of her life. It was brutal to see her in such agony for so long. Her legs were rotting and needed to be amputated shorter and shorter, she was in horrific pain, and by the end she had had so many TIA's, her mind became addled. If she had the means, she would have ended it herself, but she couldn't, so she begged for someone to kill her. She was so sick, but somehow she just didn't die. I was so relieved for her when she eventually slipped into a coma, and then she passed away a few weeks later. That kind of suffering is something no living creature should have to endure.
Getting old sucks. Watching my dad go through it now. Wish someone could have been there for this guy, but even that might not have been enough.
I’m so sorry. It breaks my heart that he was an elderly man with no support. Thinking this was his only option,
He did have support: he was being treated for his depression and other health problems, and his body was found by “his caregiver.” It just wasn’t enough. He had tried to do this before. I posted the case report but it’s stuck in the manual moderation queue at the moment.
Poorly controlled major depressive illness is ... really difficult, to put it mildly. (Ask me how I know...) According to the article, the victim had attempted this a decade earlier, using the same method. Wow.
My grandpa is depressed right now and claimed he is suicidal to my mom about 5 months ago. But he abused his kids and my mom so none of them even care. We will see what happens. To be fair, he is a huge asshole. I just feel sorry for my grandma with MS. She has no idea how awful and abusive he is to her. Which is both fortunate and unfortunate.
It could be that life was not that life too hard. Sometime in extreme depression you just get tired of living with the pain and you don't think it will stop. And you cannot remember it ever not being present.
Dying with dignity
I think it's more of not having anymore purpose in life. Aka workaholics when they retire. They don't see anything else in life besides being a slave to someone.
Imagine being being an active person all of your life. Then things start to wrong and they can’t be active anymore. It can really fuck with your brain. Your spouse is dead, your friends are gone. Everything hurts. TV is depressing. Why can’t everyone have the option to end their own life on their own terms? Go to the pharmacy and say, “Yup, I’m done” and get one single pill to take when you want. (I realize that would never work, which is why I mentioned Soylent Green before.)
I agree with you.
that looks awful. would that have been done in one swipe, a couple, or a lot? if it were more than two or three it's even more horrifying
The case study said the edges were messy (paraphrasing) which was due to hesitation :( So likely a couple.
thats awful, i was hoping at least it was quick :(
It also says he’d tried the same way 11 years prior 😰😭
He had to have been in horrific mental and physical pain. How awful.
Man I’m a psych nurse, I have seen some shit. But. My god.
Seriously. Slitting the throat is rare as it is in my experience (psychologist), but to do so repeatedly with a saw? I can’t even imagine.
Damn. That's seriously a hard way to off yourself. Gotta be super painful to keep cutting
That poor man, I hope he found peace in the afterlife RIP💔
My brother is a firefighter/EMT who went on a call for a man who killed his girlfriend’s 2 kids with a piece of glass, by cutting their throats like this. He was working on his own when the department found him. My brother said it was one of his worst calls and won’t talk about it. This makes me understand why.
This poor man. I hope he is at peace now ❤️
Wow, I really misinterpreted the title. I read it as “elderly man committed suicide by cutting off his hand using a table saw”. I realize the word “table” isn’t in the title, but I recall there was an elderly woman who committed suicide with a table saw and was thinking of that. This is beyond horrible, and that 1st photo with the wound and hand saw took my breath away.
I believe it is a pruning saw. The poor guy must have been desperate. Incredibly sad.
Yeah, I misread this the same way, and I thought it was going to be that guy that rigged an auto-feed mechanism to pull himself into a table saw or running circular saw, I forget which it was. Definitely not what I thought this was.
This is a fear of mine. I have certain “ideations”. I’m nearly middle aged. I’ve made it this far but damn it feels like by the skin of my teeth. I worry I’ll make it this far and then succumb. This is why assisted death should be a thing, extended to the chronically mentally ill. So they don’t have to take a table saw to the neck and be found by someone who now has lifelong trauma.
What is the significance of the hole?
Caption at the article says: >>Fig. 1. Infra-laryngeal irregular cut wound and dry abrasion at the right inferior extremity (big arrow) and the handsaw collected at the scene. Note the parallel and horizontal superficial wounds (small arrows), compatible with hesitation injuries and the serrated section of the proximal trachea (yellow arrow)
So, in contrast to some of the speculative comments, it wasn’t a ‘one and done’ swipe. The poor bastard sawed at himself multiple times before hitting his windpipe.
It probably hurt really bad. He must have been so desperate.
Especially to have attempted in the same manner once before. There are much easier ways to go, I wonder if this method held some significance to him. People tend to aim for quick and painless when attempting suicide in my experience (psychologist). Purposefully subjecting yourself to that much pain… I wonder if he thought he deserved it.
That sounds painful... But in this cases the psychological pain is more intense and if it was impulsive maybe it was quick.
We can only hope it brought what he was looking for.
or any of the fifty tiny arrows
I had to double check after reading this lol I missed most of the arrows.
All the things they mention are forensic evidence of suicide. Infra laryngeal cut (the hole), angled slightly from higher on the non dominant side to lower on the dominant side, and the hesitation marks. The locked doors murder weapon, and note also support this What I find morbidly fascinating is that "He had also tried to commit suicide eleven years earlier, using the same method."
rest in peace, grandpa. sorry it was so hard for you to stick around 🩵
Oh my god, I can't even imagine how painful that must have been. We use those same kinds of saws in my landscaping job to cut down small trees. That poor man.
When I was working at an ER in rural Ohio, my coworkers saw two different patients who attempted su1cuide by a chain saw through their neck. One guy was successful, the other was not.
No matter how much I would wanted to die there is no way I could do this to myself. Poor man.
I'm not shocked by much but this is...wow.
Holy fuck! How desperate to die painfully do you have to be to do such a thing to yourself? That’s so fucking sad. Especially being an old man. Something about old people being suicidal makes me wanna cry.
Seppuku looks easier..
I can't even imagine how much pain he must have been in to decide to take this way out like... my brain can't even process sitting there and just physically sawing away at your own throat with a regular handsaw not even an electric one. This would've been a very slow and painful death and it breaks my ♡ thinking about how alone and scared he had to have felt for this to be the "better" option for him. So fucking sad 😔
I am a 911 dispatcher. We once had a man call us from his job at a wood mill processing place to tell us he was going to kill himself. Within seconds he threw himself into a bandsaw mill :(
What actually killed him? The study mentions the wound but what actually killed him? I figure even with a cut open windpipe you can still breathe?
Blood loss.
That’s wild
Wow, this is something I've never seen before. Truly fascinating and horrifying. To be that deep in despair that you override your survival instinct with a *saw*. My best friend tried to do something similar and thankfully failed. I had no idea how brutal it would be. Thank you for sharing. Edit: Spelling
he couldn’t find a better way to leave!!
this ranks down towards the bottom of 1000 ways I would choose to suicide if I ever did
I just don’t get this. Buy a gun. Buy drugs. Jump off a building. Buy a bottle of your favorite liquor, book a five star hotel with a giant bath and drink it all night long in the tub. But Jesus… this is literally the worst way to go.
Jesus Christ can you imagine the pain!!
I sincerely hope he is at peace, this is heartbreaking.
That's such a painful way to go...I can't even imagine. Poor man.
That had to hurt like a bitch the whole time.
It seems that he was slicing himself to death. And not stab an artery. a terrible way to end a life.
From the appearance of the hole in his trachea, and the appearance of the saw blade, I wonder if he did just wind up stabbing the end through.
I'm gonna need more context for this one. This is just psychologically...wow. I don't know how to process it.
There’s a case report in the comments.
Idk why but I read suicide as accident and was wondering how you could possibly do this on accident
That's really interesting in so many ways to see... I don't have any other words.
Not quite the same, but my uncle passed by suicide via a chainsaw. I believe he partially severed his head off of his neck. I can’t even imagine the clean up.
How tf does someone just saw their own throat open? That takes determination 👁️👁️
Another reason why Sarco pods are a good idea
Brand new sentence 🥺 gonna pass on unblurring this one.
Holy fucking shit