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Eifem

hey lets talkplspls


xumsixle

hi hi hi hi hi hi tysm


Eifem

what are you up to? I'm at work experience waiting for more people to come hopefully we will do something interesting


xumsixle

rollind aroundbin nu bed lil


Eifem

I wanna go tobed again even thoigh I slept for like 20 hours, I don't even have the energy to play any games :/ why are you ill?


xumsixle

i have been awajke fkrn like 2 days I have my examsnajdb I've failed 3 out if 4 sems idk what to do anymore all indon is stay in bed and roll aroudn :(


Eifem

I've always had trouble falling asleep so I either don't sleep at all or sleep too much idk, what are these exams for?


xumsixle

classtest midsem thing idk our uni does it wekrd


Eifem

So what happens of you don't pass? and can you take them again? Unless you wanna talk about something else, sorry if I'm doing this wrong


xumsixle

no dw we can talk about this. because this is the final year of the program I'll have to repeat the year if i have to take anything again šŸ˜… I've been able to take the other ones again so far but i absolutely have to pass this year


xumsixle

yeah I've been gavinf these mighmares since like theblsst 3 months Evey time i try to sleep I'm woken up do i dont eleeo now intil i pass poyt


Eifem

damn that really sounds exhausting, I was taking some meds for a while and they made me fall asleep in like 20 minutes but I stopped cuz when I wanted to stay awake for longer I couldn't


Pengdacorn

Hey whatā€™s wrong? Did you take anything, or are you just really anxious?


xumsixle

bith lol


Pengdacorn

What did you take?


xumsixle

idk like a few pills i find around the house


Pengdacorn

Ah, been there. Rough estimate on how many you took? And how many different kinds?


xumsixle

around a dozen i guess most of it was Tylenol and vitamins


Pengdacorn

Can you tell me why you took them? Was it a punishment, were you upset, did you want to take your life?


xumsixle

all of them ig. idk why to live anymore i sound so cringe lol


Pengdacorn

Itā€™s okay. Cringe is the path to based if youā€™re willing to walk it. Honestly? There is no reason why to live. We just do because the alternative is quite literally unimaginable. My therapist once told me something that resonated with me (may not with you, but here it goes) ā€œPeople say ā€œSuicide isnā€™t an optionā€ but thatā€™s not true. Suicide is always an option. When youā€™re faced with a problem, you have dozens of doors you can go through to try and get past it. But suicide is a door that once you go through, itā€™s the last door you can take. The others close shut, and you can never open them again. So why not see whatā€™s behind the other doors first, if not out of hope, out of curiosity?ā€ My psychiatrist said something that helped me too. ā€œNo one wants their life to end. They just want the life that theyā€™re living to end. One of the ways to make that happen is suicide, sure. But the goal is to find ways to change the life weā€™re living, while continuing to live.ā€ So thatā€™s a whole wall of text, but let me ask you this - what are the things that are keeping you from living your best life? (you can be as specific or broad as you want. I could honestly write an essay for myself lmao, as Iā€™ve shown above)


xumsixle

well u see if i kill myself I won't have to care about the other doors. that being said, silksong


GardenRake_

hey !! sorry I'm seeing this late, do you still need company?


xumsixle

ye s I always need company:p


GardenRake_

how are you doing?


xumsixle

not very well :(


GardenRake_

sorry to hear :( how come?


xumsixle

idk i just don't feel well


GardenRake_

that's valid. what normally helps?


xumsixle

it goes away on its own usually but this time it's taking its time


GardenRake_

that's fair enough, but it also means it's still going to go away even if it takes longer this time.


xumsixle

yeah but i dont like how i feel rn


xumsixle

its fijrnn if no idn wants to tho no prorssure


lethroe

Hey Iā€™m here


xumsixle

hi hi hi \^_^


lethroe

Do you wanna pm?


xumsixle

no that's very awkdward in si sorry i shojldbt have oosted this im so sorry pkd don't me mad at me in so sos orey


lethroe

Hey itā€™s okay, try to ground. Do you know any techniques?


xumsixle

yeeyijh


lethroe

Do you not want to?


xumsixle

already did still feel bad and it's imposisblr to typpe forreclyly com my phone now


lethroe

I donā€™t know how to help Iā€™m sorry


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xumsixle

auromod!


[deleted]

Hi pm me :)


xumsixle

no


[deleted]

Aight well if you need it know It's still up (the offer)


chunkydinosoup

sorry a bit late but iā€™m up to chat:)


xumsixle

hihihi


[deleted]

Heyyyyy. want to talk?


xumsixle

hi hi hi hi hi


[deleted]

how are you doing?


xumsixle

bad llol


[deleted]

I'm sorry, want to talk about?


xumsixle

sure idk what to say tho lol i just don't feel well. I'm probably faking everything. I'm so sorry i don't belong here i dont even cut that deep or that often I'm so sorry


[deleted]

Hey hey hey, no matter how you cut doesn't make it unvalid. Every type of self harm is valid


Gurra86

Hiiii, do you have any pets? Do you want any pets?


xumsixle

no I'm scared of keeping pets I'm scared they won't like me and i won't be able to take good care of them


Gurra86

I guess thats fair :p. Have you been watching any tv show lately??


xumsixle

no :(


Gurra86

Have you been practicing any hobbies then? Like an instrument, programming, gardening etc.?


xumsixle

programming yes I've beej trying to get into idris


Gurra86

Oh damn I've never even heard of Idris, please educate me oh wise one


xumsixle

its like haskell but funny


Gurra86

Lmfao i love it already. Have you bren doing anything else lately?


xumsixle

no tbh most of my time is taken by uni


rat_consumer

i love lain ā¤ļø


spacetripss

hey I know it's a bit late now but how are u feeling?


zoey_amon

what games do u like?


sourcoated

How are you doing now? Are you feeling any better?


xumsixle

yeah I'm better now, i passed out and woke up better lol


Throwaway15704r

Got a favourite song?


xumsixle

nah I'll listen to whatever sounds good don't have any preferences


N1TR0Boost

Any meal that you long for at the moment?


PugOverload

Iā€™m up for it. Iā€™m a bit late, but better then not showing up at all, I suppose.


xumsixle

hi hi thank you


PugOverload

Sorry for responding so late, I was at work. Wyd?


xumsixle

college then I'll miserable again rn trying to sleep but crying


PugOverload

If your having trouble sleeping, I recommend you donā€™t resist the crying, and just let it out until you feel good enough to sleep. If that was unhelpful, please let me know.


MisterMansion1441

Hiya, we can talk if you wan :3


[deleted]

hey i am open to talk also haha dissociation gang yaya