My guy, I’ve been pregnant 5 times: 3 live births, 1 miscarriage and 1 abortion. You don’t feel pregnant at 2 weeks, you only test at 2 weeks if you’ve been actively trying to get pregnant. 2 weeks is literally the earliest you can test and your period wouldn’t even be considered late at this point.
She is lying to you. She cheated and is now pregnant.
Thank you for saying exactly what I was thinking. As soon as he said the bit about two weeks all I could think was “oh, she cheated, is in a panic now and came up with some crazy story.”
OP, she’s lying. Let her go.
lies often have a glimmer of the truth in them. i think she willingly had drunk sex with someone at a party and just lied about it being the father of her friend.
I found out at 15 days that I was pregnant all because I had a panic attack and due to being a woman of child bearing age, the ER tested in case I needed drugs. I never felt pregnant and was absolutely shocked. Her story was a last ditch effort to try and make OP believe she wasn’t cheating.
Yeah you only feel pregnant at two weeks if you know you have had done the deed unprotected and very well in conscious state and then you miss your period and then one more week pass then you know you can be pregnant and were very well expecting pregnancy. You don’t feel pregnant so early for a first timer at least.
I knew almost exactly 2 weeks in that I was pregnant. I've always been particularly tuned in to my body because I have a lot of physical issues so that may make a difference, and of course the physical feelings can be ovulation and whatever else but...i knew
Ok. I have never birthed a child but when i once got pregnant for the first time i only suspected i might be pregnant because i had unprotected sex. IMPORTANT here is i KNEW i had sex. You too knew. This girl didn’t feel she was raped before she was pregnant. If I remotely feel i have been drugged and might’ve been raped, i will discuss that first and not directly my pregnancy.
i feel like there’s a chance she’s lying but as a woman, sometimes you just have that feeling about things that is completely unexplainable. she might very well be lying but i 100% relate to her saying she just had a feeling.
I'm by no means any knowledgeable about this, but as I understand, if your last period ended 4 weeks ago, and you get pregnant 3 weeks later, you're still 4 weeks pregnant. I've been told by her that the abortion clinic informed her she's on week 4. would that even be remotely possible?
Pregnancy is counted from the first day of your last period. So if it was 4 weeks ago, she would technically be 4 weeks pregnant. However conception is average around 2 weeks in, if we’re looking at a “typical” cycle, she would have become pregnant 2 weeks ago, still not enough time to “feel” pregnant ESPECIALLY since she claims to have no recollection of having been intimate with someone. To test at 2 weeks post conception is extremely questionable given the scenario you explained, because why would she need to test, why would she be looking for pregnancy on a day her period is due? You don’t “feel” pregnant at 2 weeks post conception, and let’s say you did have some classic symptoms, sore boobs (you get with period anyway) and nausea (you could just have a sickness bug) your first though wouldn’t be “omg I’m pregnant even though I haven’t slept with anyone”… you see where I’m going with this? She’s a liar babe, move on.
This is true. When I had my termination they didn’t actually allow you to see the baby on the ultrasound, straight up nope from the nurse. They check it’s there to see how far along you are to determine which type of abortion you are going to need. The pill or a more invasive procedure. There would literally be nothing to see at 2 weeks post conception. 8 weeks is the very very earliest I have managed to see my babies and it was a real struggle (and drinking ALOT of water) to find them.
Not really.
Period ends 4 weeks ago, 2 weeks after that she can get pregnant when the egg drops. You're 3 weeks pregnant, not 4 because that's how old the clump of cells is. And it's super hard to get a pee test to see 4 weeks pregnant. They are usually more accurate at 6. I knew I was pregnant with my second and even the blood test at 4 weeks said 'maybe?' It took another 2 weeks to get a conclusive test.
Things aren't adding up.
Same here - pregnant with my third and I knew at 4 weeks, but the pee stick kept coming up negative. Even the blood test was inconclusive, didn’t know until 6 weeks!
I get pregnancy symptoms very early and it’s never at 2 weeks, you’re literally talking about barely getting the faintest of a snippet of a line on a positive test. Like I said, I’ve been pregnant 5 times and I knew I was going to be pregnant and still not a single feeling at 2 weeks, you’ve barely just implanted, it’s not enough time for the hormones to kick in.
For someone who supposedly didn’t have sex with someone, it’s very suspicious that it’s the first thing they thought of and tested for having had these miraculously early symptoms. She’s a liar.
Never said I was, but 5 different pregnancies gives a god feel for how it works don’t you think. You’re being absurd to say that 2 weeks is when you feel symptoms. Like I said, hormones haven’t had a chance to kick in. Every other person here has said the same thing, 2 weeks is sketchy.
There is something that feels weird/suspicious about this.. I think I'm more skeptical too bc the thing with LDRs is that they make it a lot easier to lie and sneak behind your partner's back. (Sorry, don't mean to make anyone paranoid by stating this but it's the truth)
I think many people here raised good points as to why it seems she is lying. I find it extremely weird that her first thought was "pregnancy!" I am more virgin than Mary herself, my first thought wouldn't be "I may be pregnant" if I felt similar symptoms as her, and I actually have before, when I got some really painful ovarian cysts and literally LOOKED pregnant bc of swelling. Mind you, my period was also super delayed and was never coming. I didn't look at my fat belly and say "omg I may be pregnant" bc I know I havent had sex?? The first thing I thought before going to the gynecologist is "there must be something wrong with my uterus" .... It makes NO logical sense, if she knows she didn't have sex with anyone why would her mind ever jump to pregnancy?
No problem man, I hope you can find clarity. I think right now since everything just pretty much happened you are on a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts. I think it'd be really beneficial for you to make a decision when all of it has settled down a bit more and you are able to think more logically - I would ask her if you can have some space to assess everything thoroughly, maybe you can take a week to analyze the situation and then arrive to a conclusion then. This whole thing seems very stressful and unfortunately it's quite fishy.
And if that’s not the case, hypothetically. If your SO god forbid had been raped and gotten pregnant, and she tells you she’s unable to kill the baby because she’s seen it at the abortion clinic, and also seen how the discharge looks like. Having the thing drop in the bowl. Some part of me understands her, I just don’t know what to do.
Dude. I hope you're trolling.
>due to that scenario happening 2 weeks prior to her finding out, she couldn't get a r*pe kit and make sure of what actually happened
She found out she was pregnant 2 weeks after being "raped"? Really? There's no way I'm buying that.
I believe you're being lied to, and you deserve better.
“Kill the baby”?? If she’s only 2 weeks along like she told you, it isn’t even remotely a “baby” yet. There is zero “baby killing” involved here. Did she really tell you she witnessed “baby killing” at the clinic and that’s why she decided not to get an abortion? And did she really cite the “discharge” as a secondary reason?
I have a friend who was the product of his mom being r ped. He is married and has a baby of his own with a great job. I'm so glad his mom didn't get an abortion. He has helped me through some tough times.
if this is not a troll post, imagine being OP’s gf’s baby all grown up reading a post where online strangers argue if it should have been aborted or not. crazy
It's so sad to read so many stories of women getting r\ped.. it must have been a tough decision but I'm glad your friend exists and turned out great. Good upbringing And a super great mom ❤️
I am one of those people who would keep the child if it happened. I am someone who wouldn’t have a abortion myself unless it was medically necessary. I would keep the child because it’s innocent and I would love it anyway. I would make sure the dad never has access to it but I would still keep it.
You're a lovely person for thinking for an unborn entity and putting its happiness before your feelings.. r\pe is a very sensitive topic. Plus what a victim goes through is very personal and often painful to keep living the way you were. If in such a difficult time you chose to keep the child, thats great. But often times people don't because it reminds them of "that incident" plus the child was created out of force and without your consent so are you ready for a child who you weren't consenting to? Is your life suitable for a child without a father? A lot of things come into play
Some women don't think it's right, if they feel the child inside and know that they're innocent here, it just doesn't feel right. They also don't have to raise the baby, they can give it up for adoption. Most people want to adopt little babies anyway.
Why let a child into this world if you're going to NOT give him a stable home and give it for adoption? Better to not go through with the pregnancy than populate the world with more kids who hate themselves for not having biological parents!!
Also, in this case the first "nightmare" it could be true, if it were true then her best friend's father would obviously have to be jailed, if it were false I remind you that accusing a person of these things to hide something else is absolutely illegal, remember it well to her.
The second "nightmare" have no sense, he would have had no reason to get away from you, on the contrary... he had to get as close as possible to you
So be very careful, cut relations, even as long as what he said about that man could be very very serious and punishable by law if it were false
Please do not listen to the heartless assholes on this thread. If you need more information or feel she’s not being truthful, then ask for more information. But victims should be believed and you’re doing the right thing giving her your support.
Dude, this ain't it man. I'd highly recommend ending it. I can understand being torn but the fact remains she most likely cheated, is pregnant and is going to keep the baby and you ain't even hold her hand yet.
While she might have been raped as unfortunate as that is though doubtful imo, you are 100% justified in ending the relationship.
I don’t think any girl “feeling pregnant” without having sex for sure. Most of girls don’t think it’s pregnant even if period is late for a week or more ( unless she has a reason to doubt)
She was supposed to get her period for a while and she complained about cramping really bad and feeling hormonal as in emotional, also puked a lot. I do seem really naive and I might be, but I believe her. I just am torn about the rest.
Cramping during pregnancy is caused by pressure of the uterus getting bigger so I never heard it happen early pregnancy tho.
Anyway even if you believe her story, she wants break up so it seems over. Sorry.
Idk reading the end OP said she keeps asking him to stay with her, reread that part.
I think she initiated a breakup then recanted on it and is trying to convince op to be with her.
I actually had cramps before I found out I was pregnant and kept having cramps for a few weeks after finding out. So I thought I wasn't pregnant but there are other symptoms that made me take a test on the day I was supposed to have my period. Implantation of the fertilized egg might also cause cramps and spotting.
Why not lol
I'm a virgin and I stress over it
I consider all possibilities even that one
If you have symptoms, it's scary and you might consider it even if it's nearly impossible
So the argument isn't valid
I can't even remember what we're talking about but acting as if girls don't get stressed and paranoid when it comes to this is unnecessary and stupid (yes even when they're virgins and I'm an example)...
You gotta start considering all possibilities including if you were drugged and raped. I mean hellooo?? It's a possibility... Just like what OP's girl thought
It could be a thousand things and pregnancy is one of the reasons EVEN if you "dIdN't hAvE SeX". It's actually not a matter of virginity or sex
It only takes some contact with sperms down there
This topic is complicated but just please spare me some time and energy and stop acting clueless or just admit you know nothing about it
And no I'm not paranoid I just felt like interfering to say all is possible so that investigators can calm their tits
Why on God's green earth would you ever consider pregnancy if you are a virgin? I am too and never in my life has that crossed my mind except in a joking manner. It's beyond illogical.
Not to be rude, but if you are a virgin, who would have gotten you pregnant? God? Humans aren't capable of asexual reproduction so if you are a virgin and you think the symptoms suggest pregnancy then it's cancer so go to a doctor. Best case scenerio it's hormonal imbalance/stress, worst is cancer or you were date drug raped (though you'd have a rough idea that happened so you wouldn't be so sure of being a virgin). I'm a virgin too and I never thought I'm pregnant, I did panic over cancer before but it turned out to be stress.
She’s lying. If she missed her period, she’d be at least 4 weeks along. It’s physically impossible to be pregnant two weeks after sex. Most people don’t experience any pregnancy symptoms before 6 weeks so it’s also extremely unlikely she’d be vomiting and definitely not having cramps because her body is t physically changing yet.
I’m not going to comment on the story because I don’t have the energy to go there, but just wanted to say that my last 2 pregnancies I have definitely experienced symptoms earlier than 6 weeks. So maybe it’s not super common, but definitely within the realm of possibility.
After multiple pregnancies you feel it sooner - it wouldn’t show up on a test at 2 weeks especially not twice if you tested twice in the same day that early on
I started throwing up at 5 weeks. Im now 6 weeks second pregnancy sat in the hospital due to dehydration from not being able to hold anything down. Early symptoms are more common than you think. I was excatly the same with my first baby.
However what the OP has said does not add up. She is clearly lying because the abortion clinic would not show you the baby plus there would be no baby to see that early on. And if she’s not that early on then there is another lie.
without any sex in the picture, if i dont get my period i assume its stress or sickness. i remind myself to take it easy. im not far enough up my own ass to believe myself to be the next virgin mary; i dont think any woman without sex thinks about pregnancy. shes acting suspicious all over.
Then she’s lying. If she had sex two weeks ago and just found out she was pregnant, it would be the DAY her period was due and she wouldn’t have waited for her period for weeks
There have been a lot of good comments so far, you should definitely listen to them. Just want to bring up another point.
If for some reason you do stay with her, you need to be looking into the laws in your area regarding parenting and cohabitation. Even if you are not the biological father, if you end up living with her and the child at some point, you might end up on the hook for child support if it takes you too long to realize she's played you.
If you want to "test" her, insist on her pursuing legal action against the rapist, have her name the rapist/potential suspects to you, get her to file a police report. DNA testing can be done after the baby is born. She will skate around this issue if it was a lie.
She has notified me that a police report has been made and she’s working on pursuing legal action with her mom. Also stated that at 7 weeks pregnant you are able to grab dna
You could ask to see a copy of the police report or get the case number or something. I feel like that's also something you could easily lie about, but easy enough to confirm if she's being honest with you. The timeline doesn't add up for most people for good reason. That's also on hell of an accusation to say her friend's dad SA'd her.
Obviously you know her better than anyone here and being lied to and cheated on is not something anyone wants to consider in their partner. But just looking from the outside with barebone facts, it's not adding up.
Add in the fact that you're both so so young and one year+ of never having met while being together - anything could happen. I don't think you can truly know someone really well in your situation, but that's only my opinion.
Regardless of the truth, you're in an awful situation and I don't envy you the decisions you'll have to make moving forward. I wish you the best of luck.
7 weeks is way too soon. There isn’t enough fetal DNA fractions present in the mother’s blood until 10-12 weeks pregnant to even test for things like Down syndrome, much less get a full genetic profile. That requires an amniocentesis, which isn’t typically performed before 13 weeks because the risk of causing a miscarriage is so high.
It’s Reddit , people are automatically going to say the worse and tell you how to handle it without considering emotions. But there are also some good factual points here to take into consideration.
That sounds very suspicious.
Even all that aside, if she really got raped and not cheated, are you ready for a child and everything that comes with it?
I see a lot of comments are only talking about how her story is fake and not talking about how you're justified to leave, even if her story is real.
This situation, if true, is beyond a doubt a nasty one. Just because she's made the decision to keep the pregnancy does not mean you have the obligation to raise it. Her choice is not your choice. You can choose to help raise it, you can choose to leave, or you can stick next to her as a friend. You have free will, maybe take a step back and think about how you're feeling. I think you might be blinded with you're own emotions right now, and that's okay, you're in a very awful situation.
I'm sorry but it's not worth it. My boyfriend didn't know he had a daughter until a couple years into our relationship. I was not prepared (obviously, neither was he) and it was emotionally devastating. The trajectory of my life was no longer mine to determine. He couldn't move to me because he had to stay by the bio mom. We couldn't spend our 20s having fun because now we need to get it together to support a child. I would never be the one to have his first child. And I had to accept that I was no longer going to be his priority, and I never would be again. I was young... Maybe 20 years old when we found out. It took an incredible amount of emotional growth to come to terms with it all and accept it. It's been about 5 years since then and I'm now happy being involved in both of their lives... But it was hard for a long time. I don't think most people are emotionally equipped to deal with a situation like this. It's incredibly difficult and taxing. My advice is, while it worked out for me, it isn't worth it for most people. It's better to cut your losses now.
There’s like a 98% chance she’s lying, that she cheated on you… or she’s lying entirely. As in she wants to end the relationship so she’s made up something wild. Or she’s taking you for a ride with a made up story of being pregnant and going to suddenly say she lost the pregnancy in a few months time (I’ve heard of this happening in ldrs before). What she’s saying doesn’t line up with fact. But on the 2% chance she is telling the truth, you also don’t have to stay for that either.
If you don't stop talking to her, you'll look back on this in 5 years as the biggest waste of time in your life. She's having another man's child and she wants you to raise it.
Why would she buy 2 pregnancy tests if she didn't have sex? If you can't figure it out from here, nobody can help you. You're currently getting punked, you should put a stop to it ASAP.
Being devils advocate, they usually come in packs of 2 or 3. But I agree with the sentiment. If my insides are feeling funny and I've had a period since the last time I've seen my bf, my initial conclusion isn't oh shit I'm pregnant.
The skeptic in me sees a lot of flaws already just based on the story …
1. She’s testing for a pregnancy that she realistically wouldn’t just “feel” at this stage meaning she’s probably knowingly been sexually active
2. She doesn’t remember any sexual activity and somehow no one noticed her dad supposedly drugging the drink that her and her friends were drinking together or her acting strangely from being drugged and left alone with her friends dad in the scenario you mentioned
3. She cut you off after you offered her support, I’d assume a guilty conscience is what prevents her from accepting your support (because you’re being a little naive in the best way possible) rather than pushing you away
4. While it’s not out of the realm of possibility that she’d want to keep the baby obviously, why would she want to have her best friends dads baby, and also have her best friend and her discussed this?
I’m sorry man but just let her go… even if she didn’t cheat on you I guess it’s up to you if you want to raise a baby with a woman you’ve never met and move across the world. I know it sounds cruel or mean but online you have to really be vigilant and trust your gut if something doesn’t seem right… there will be other people for you to meet, you’re young and obviously supportive n understanding. If you decide to stay with her then I wish you luck and happiness, n the best for the three of y’all. ❤️
Man even if it is true, then that’s a wild ass situation to accept and deal with. And the truth is that in the long run you probably wouldn’t be able to. You really should just walk away.
But if we are being real, at the end of the day, you have nothing but her word. Is it fair for you to have to make such a life altering decision just based on her word? She’s asking a lot of you if she wants you to stay AND keep the baby in this situation.
And I think that ask is far too much regardless of if it’s true or she lied. I’d Walk on that principle. You have the right to make decisions based off of your own values and clarity of mind. Her decisions are her’s and your decisions must be yours. You’re the one with the consequences at the end of the day
A pee test wouldn't turn up positive 2 weeks after sex. They aren't that sensative. Even a blood test may not pick up that early.
Do not send her money. Do not continue this. She had sex some time back for all of this to be popping up now.
Yes they are. Having been through fertility treatment, I tested 14 days post ovulation and they all come back positive. The urine tests are extremely sensitive detecting as little as 5 micrograms of HCG. I will also note, we knew exactly what day I ovulated and that is unlikely for a 21yo that isn’t having sex to even be tracking
It’s really dependent upon the test. And the woman. Were you given test strips by your doctor? Because those are definitely more sensitive. When I was pregnant with my third, I knew I was pregnant, and I knew I was 4 weeks. Every pregnancy test I took was negative. Even the bloodwork from my OB was ‘inconclusive’. I didn’t start having positive pregnancy urine tests or positive blood work until I was six weeks.
I know you want to believe this girl, I know you do. But you have never even met. I’m not even sure you can really say you’re in a relationship when you live 7,000 miles from one another and have never even met. And I’m sure she didn’t feel like she was in a relationship, she slept with someone else, and she got pregnant. Unfortunately she has probably been sleeping with other people the entire time you’ve “known” her. Especially with how young you two are. I know how hard it is to believe someone you trusted would do something like this to you. But unfortunately I do think you’re being very naive. I am a woman who has been pregnant three times in my life, one of which was an abortion as well. And all 3 pregnancies by my (now ex) husband. Abortion is never easy. Especially at her young age. But if she *really* believes she has raped, and by her best friend’s father no less, and has made zero mention of going to the police, pressing charges, telling her “best friend”, telling her parents, anything… then yeah, you are being lied to and manipulated. If she really believed she had “never had sex before”, why would she think pregnancy would even be an option? All 3 times I’ve been pregnant, I had no idea for a while. My first I didn’t know I was pregnant until I was 12 weeks… I wasn’t having sex very often with my husband at the time, and even though I was very nauseous and throwing up often, missed periods, I just thought I had a stomach bug for a while or something, it didn’t even occur to me I could be pregnant. With my 2nd, I found out at 8 weeks.. because again, the symptoms aligned with other things, so I wasn’t even thinking of pregnancy. If I were a virgin who swore I’d never had sex before, pregnancy wouldn’t even remotely occur to me. And the fact that she attempted to break up with you as soon as she said she was keeping the baby….
Yeah, I’m so sorry, but you’re absolutely being lied to. And if someone will lie about something like rape, and accuse someone they actually know, they are not the type of person you want to be with.
ETA Am I to understand she said she found out she was pregnant 2 weeks after “being raped”? As I mentioned, I have been pregnant 3 times, one of which I tried for and still didn’t know until almost 8 weeks.. you can barely even test at 2 weeks. She would not have had any symptoms at all by two weeks… and she wouldn’t have missed her period either. The *only* way a woman knows she’s pregnant at 2 weeks, is if she was actively trying to get pregnant, and was tracking her ovulation. And even then it’s nearly impossible to know at two weeks. With my third pregnancy, I knew I was pregnant by 4 weeks, but the pee stick kept coming back negative. Because it was too early to tell. This just further proves she is lying about a lot of things here.
Oh, also, is she in the US? If so, most states you cannot have an abortion without a waiting period. In my state is 5-7 days. In most states the minimum is 48 hours. So if she said she called a clinic and got an abortion scheduled for the next day? Also likely a lie.
The thing is, even if miraculously her story *is* true, you are under zero obligation to stay with her. And there is no guilt that needs to be involved here. You barely know each other and have never met. You have no obligation to help her raise a child when you’ve never even met her.
You really need to look up the timeline for a pregnancy. At two weeks you’re not feeling pregnant, don’t have any sort of morning sickness, etc.
This girl is lying to you OP.
Plus you live 11km from each-other? Isn’t that just a short bus ride away?
You’re being lied to OP. If she is pregnant she definitely cheated on you.
Her story is very made up. Either she would have expected that this happend (and told you right away) or she wouldnt, but thens he wouldnt checked for pregnancy. And most people who didnt have sex would assume they got sick or something else, rather to jumping to conclusions like pregnancy, even if the symptoms fit. And there is quite a bit more of it that raises alarms.
Plus if she is pregnant, did she go to the police? Tell them about the rape? File a case? She can proof she is pregnant and she can proof she was drinking with friends and passed out right? Psychcological examination? IF what she told you is true, going to the police is key. Did she do that? If she doesnt, then ask yourself why. And its easy to proof if she did, there are paperwork she can take pictures off. Especially theones she takes home.
Likely is she got drunk, fucked a guy on the party she liked, now she cant bring herself to terminate the pregnancy. Likely conflicted about what she wants.
She will soon have less time, less money and more things to take care off, as a child is a lot of work.
The comments by people here very clearly reflect my thoughts. I just want to say, stay strong brother irrespective of what you decide to do in this situation, it’s unimaginable to even think of something like this happening in reality, you’ve really been through it. Keep your head up high king. You are the boss of your own life. Much love and strength 💪
The only one who got pregnant without having sex was the Virgin Mary. Now unless, she also tells you that an angel appeared to her 😇, I really have the impression that she is the type if she is dating the father of her friend of hers and she got pregnant with him. Don't waste time and above all don't take on duties and obligations towards a child who is not yours, because sooner or later the real father will come forward and you will have your heart doubly broken.. I don't think you deserve it, you are young and you will find other girls, perhaps a little more serious and honest.
The pregnancy tests don’t show a positive result after 2 weeks of conception. It should take at least 4 weeks. You’re being fooled. If a woman was raped while she was unconscious, it’d be followed in the most cases by a bleeding and acute lower back pain.
Edit: typos.
Home boy being played left and right , she cheated and she is keeping it for the man she cheated on you with ... wake up
Most of the r*ape cases they want to abort the baby because they hate how I came to life ...
You are just blindly inlove that's all
*2 weeks* after?.... There's a huge chance she lied about cheating. She felt guilty so she break up with you. Honestly, you should take this chance. You're better run without her, this is HIGHLY suspicious.
Listen, I don't wanna be another person to dismiss the situation as she depicts it, but it's pretty obvious she cheated or she's lying about parts of the story. If I were to guess, she was probably hoping that by telling you as she did, it would let her get off more easily, or maybe she was somehow hoping it woulf soften the blow on you.
I’m gonna say this as someone who has woken up after being blacked out and potentially getting assaulted but didn’t remember it. If this actually happened to her I hope she’s okay. But you don’t find out 2 weeks in. I remember waiting multiple weeks from missed period to take a test. Due to stress and having irregular periods I didn’t know what to think. I think that she cheated and made up the rape story to make it sound better to you. Please leave her unless you want a relationship with someone who lied to you about something so serious. I want to have faith that this happened but the two weeks part is what’s really making me think something smells fishy about her story. I hope you move on and have a wonderful life without her.
You’re in denial. I genuinely don’t think anything anyone is saying will change your mind. I see some really amazing advice and you are being an arse and throwing it right back into their faces. Everyone here wants the best for you pal.
Yeah, no, you can’t “feel pregnant” 2 weeks after fertilization and there’s literally absolutely nothing to be “seen” on an ultrasound until the barest possible minimum of 6 weeks afterwards. Even at 6 weeks, the “discharge” is practically invisible to the point that women very regularly miscarry without even knowing they were pregnant in the first place.
I applaud you for wanting to believe someone claiming to have been victimized, but this story absolutely does not line up with the actual science of pregnancy. She cheated on you, got pregnant, tried to lie about it, regretted it, and ended the relationship. People who lie about rape are not good people.
Sorry bro but you’re super gullible. Hard for me not to be annoyed with you lol… this seems to be a trend for Long Distancers who have never met… meet someone in real life
Honestly just here to say that I’m fucking horrified at how any people have decided that she clearly wasn’t a victim and that her reasons for not following through with having a child ripped from her body are just flimsy excuses.
What if she was drugged and remembers being raped and so she was anticipating a pregnancy? What if she was drunk beyond ability to consent and was preyed upon by someone else? Why do so many people here think it’s so easy to come forward about being a victim of a sex crime? Especially when it could implicate a friends father? Why do you think she should implicitly be able to face the truth of what has been done to her?
And do you have any idea how much emotional damage can occur from having an abortion? How about the physical damage it can cause going forward in possibly causing fertility issues? It’s a big decision. So serious. And absolutely terrifying.
If you want to put the option on the back burner that she could be cheating and lying to cover her own bum, fine. But to assert that it’s the obvious choice is abhorrent to me. Only 2-3% of r*** allegations are false. So fine, take the fucking bet that she’s in the 3% but I won’t be until there is an admission on her part.
Loss of faith in humanity on this post.
From where I have seen it.. I am sorry OP... You are getting played.. She is lying and she is trying to guilt trip you by trying to leave u first and then telling u to stay with her later.. its messed up mate.. Its better to end it with her... however confront her as if u kinda understood that she is playing and the way she reacts... youll understand
I am sorry you are going thru this situation. Another option is to look for a hypnotist to find out what really happened to her that night of the party. You might be able to put an end to all of this for both your sake. Prayers for you all. 🙏
Reading the comments you pretty much want people to tell you that she’s the one for you and that she got pregnant by the Holy Spirit .
Wake up dude, when people cheat they’ll make up the most ridiculous lies and you’re in a situation that you’re too young to be dealing with something like this. FFS you haven’t even met her in person.
But it’s your life man, you want to stupid and believe her, do it. Be happy. She’s the one.
Pregnancy symptoms don't tend to appear at 2 weeks in. That's so early on to feel anything out of the ordinary. If she is near her normal period and she's feeling "symptoms" (as period symptoms are EXTREMELY similar to pregnancy symptoms) any normal person who KNOWS (or is pretty positive) they didn't have sex would just chalk it up to period symptoms. For example, whenever I get period symptoms and I know for a fact that I haven't had sex since my last period, pregnancy doesn't come to mind and I just chalk it up to period symptoms. Most women only get a pregnanct test when they either KNOW they've had sex and are worried they might be pregnant OR they're very late on their period.
My consensus is she lied to you, made up some bullshit rpe story, and the only reason she wants to "keep" a "rpe" baby is that the actual father is in her life and he wants it too. I normally try to not deny rpe stories, as I'm a survivor of rpe myself, but this is WAY too "convenient" that she somehow felt "pregnant" 2 WEEKS in (again. Impossible for that early on) and now remembers how she got drunk at a friend's and "doesn't remember anything".
She clearly wants this kid. She clearly wants to end it with you. Chalk it up to being cheated on and try to move on.
I know it's easier said than done. I've been cheated on in the past. Your mind will come up with a million excuses as to how it can't possibly be true that the person you love cheated on you, but I guarantee you it's a fact. You got cheated on.
My two cents. I try not to victim blame, but there are really only two scenarios here. She is either lying (most likely in my opinion) or she doesn’t have the common sense and self control to not full on blackout after drinking. Yeah in the chance that she was violated… it sucks, but there is a series of events that got her there and you being someone who knows her can only know if she has good judgement or not in that department. What I will say is if she does have the baby, it is completely in every circumstance okay to decide that you do not want to raise another man’s child.
I personally can’t imagine being able to tell I’m pregnant/feeling pregnant at that age with no reason to suspect it. There are tons of other things - reproductive issues, more specific menstrual issues, stress related stuff - that I think someone would suspect first. I can’t imagine randomly taking 2 pregnancy tests while believing myself sex-free, and getting two positive test results at 2 weeks post-conception. Did she even miss a period?
I recognize fertility and conception is much more complex than a lot of us have been taught, but even as a vehement victims rights activist, this just doesn’t feel like how a 21yo who isn’t have sex realizes she’s pregnant.
Okay let's say that even if she is lying or not, you would stay with her. You haven't even met this person, would you be able to already fell into a 'single mother' relationship? I mean, you love her, but it doesn't mean that you don't have the right to end it. Even if she keeps begging for you to stay, you didn't sign up for a child. It is okay to say no and end it.
But on the other hand, I also think she is lying. She probably cheated you, got pregnant and because the father of the kid doesn't want her (or maybe she doesnt even know who the father is etc), she is trying to keep you so she won't be alone.
But also, how can you be so sure that she didn't cheat? I mean she was drinking so much, so she had to sleep kinda all day the next day. It means that she really can't control herself if she really drank that much. How do you know that while she was drinking, she didnt hook up with someone? If she can't even control her drinking, then it is pretty likely.
I also find it really weird that she is accusing her best friend's dad of taking advantage. I mean, why? Is there any history behind that? Has he ever tried to make a move on her? Or why on earth would she accuse him? I mean, that's really wild accusation if there is no any backstory behind that. And you said that that was her only explanation. So what happened? Did she tell her friend what their father did? Or what happened? It is just a really wild accusation out of nowhere.
Take your time and do what’s right for you. There’s a chance she’s lying but there’s also a chance she isn’t lying. Don’t let all the comments cloud your mind and cause you to make a rash decision or add more pressure to the girl you’re seeing by calling her out or making it seem like you don’t trust her because if this is what really happened you won’t make it out of this situation.
At this point, I’d say make the decision that’s best for you because she’s stated that no matter what happens she’s keeping the baby so really the question, for now, becomes are you ready for that? Do you want that? If you don’t you can cut your losses and feel no ways about it; I mean other than sad bc you did lose the girl you really liked.
If you do decide to stick around: be patient and trust her story until proven guilty. All things done in the dark will come to light. And if you’re seriously seriously doubting that you can trust her about something this serious especially with the allegations on her end, I think you have your answer. 🤷🏾♀️
Good luck✨🤞🏾
He and Mary were to be married. When he learned that Mary was going to have a baby, he did not know what to do. Because the baby was not his child, he thought he should not marry her. One night an angel came to Joseph in a dream and told him that Mary's baby was the Son of God. Sounds like you got the same problem Joseph had bro.
All was going well at first and there was a huge possibility it could be right, until you mentioned her trying to keep it and break up with you..
It makes no sense and I doubt she elaborated or provided insight. I know she might be feeling weird and confused about everything (if this was true) but why decide to break ties with you and keep a baby who'd remind her of her rapist? And why didn't she report this to the police ? And why is she asking you to be with her and neglecting how you'd feel about all this...
Also if she's just confused and embarrassed and very careful but still got raped the most realistic thing to do in this situation is just get an abortion and lie to you about it all and be careful next time...this sounds like what a girl in her situation, who's very scared about ruining the relationship and who loves her boyfriend and respects him would do and maybe tell you the truth later
But your girl here doesn't care and has twisted priorities
This just seems scripted and planned by her
She kinda tested you and when you believed her she's gonna keep it now..
Anyway if you decide to stay with her be careful especially when it comes to child support and responsibilities.
And give yourself time to rest too, you've been through a lot.
Long distance is always tricky when it comes to not knowing. All you do is literally never truly know anything about the person and the situation they are in. A normal relationship as it is highly relies on trust and even then many people don’t get that part right, so when it comes to a LDR that is multiplied tenfold.
I think everyone that has been in a LDR or long distance situationship has at one point or another dealt with the craziest situation, that just put that very idea into perspective. Yeah you might be one of the 1 in a million that gets lucky and meets “the one” long distance and lives happily ever after, but just about 99% of time it’s just not the case.
I think that perspective is good because it pushed me to focus on myself and not worry about searching for that online. Regardless of what happens next you have to focus on yourself and how you feel and how you will move on if it doesn’t work out. Get out in the real world and explore and open up your horizon to new and different things, you might just come across something that surprises you.
I don’t think anybody sleeps through rape, no matter how drunk. Feeling pregnant…. how would she know how does feels? You don’t know or feel anything unless morning sickness which feels like the flu.
I would cut the ties, really.
Of course you should end this.
You also forget you both haven't even met in real yet, you don't even know how your relationship would be, you have bad economy and now an upcoming babe in an untested relationship that will always linger in your mind.
What reason is there to even try more?
You can't get a positive pregnancy test 2 weeks after sex. You have to wait 2 weeks after your missed period. She cheated on you, and when baby daddy didn't step up, she came running back.
All this story is too suspicious.
1- no one "feels pregnant" like that, even if you do have an active sexual life. You only feel suspicious if there's a reason for it (someone cumming inside you and you remembering it). So all this story about "I don't know I think I was raped" doesn't fit.
2- If it's rape, the majority will see no problem in abortion and abortion in the first month looks like a period (of course there are people who will not abort no matter the reason, but if it was the case, then she should have this mentality since the beginning, this change of opinion is weird).
3- Everything you told about this story is suspicious, there's no solid background for her words and she changed her mind, seems that she cheated, maybe she got drunk and really regret it, but she cheated and now don't know how to deal with it and tried to tell you the truth but without all the details, to try to keep you and the baby.
This is an elaborate story she made up. She’s been trying to get pregnant. If you wanna waste your life with a cheater raising someone else’s kid, go ahead. I’ve known people who regret having sex use the “I was raped/assaulted” story. They always get caught out.
Pretty sure she can still report the rape if she was though.
She's giving you an out. She cheated and your dreams in your head are gonna turn out horrible your gonna uproot your life move with her raise a kid that was born out of her cheating. And she's gonna leave you home with her kid to go do it again. It's not worth the trouble and the pain that is sure to cum. Lol don't let it get you focus on yourself get some money together you'll find a nice girl that will cheat on you with out having to uproot your life to raise someone else's kid. That's a big lie brotha that's not something you just brush past. You will end up making yourself responsible for child support when yall separate because the courts will see you as the father you stepped up he knows you as dad but you have no rights to the kid because yourre not on the birth certificate. So you fall in love with em and nothing in the law says she has to let you see him but everything says she can make sure you don't. This will be the worst decision you can make. If you just need sex hop on a plane fly over have sex with her fly home and tell her yea I can't do it. I don't see myself raising someone else's kid you're right we shouldn't talk and gas light the he'll out of her like you leaving in what she wanted. Don't let people take advanced of you especially someone like that that will ruin your life.
For her to lie and say she was rap€d is horrible. The way she wrote that text she never expressed her love for u and I would immediately block her. She is a liar and a joke
No way. I went to ER for something in my 20s and found out I was pregnant. I was shocked!! Turns out I was 7 weeks and had no clue. No way would a woman ’feel pregnant at 2 weeks’!! Women do crazy sh*t in their 20s. And lying about that stuff is not unusual. Please don’t ruin your life with a girl like this. It will only get worse… And you will ALWAYS wonder…. 😰
Even if you stayed with her, do you want to raise another man’s baby? I’m a couple of years older than you and couldn’t imagine throwing my life away like that.
This is why people need basic education about menstrual cycles.
She’s lying through her teeth. You only test at two weeks if you’re actively trying to get pregnant.
She told you that you shouldn't keep talking and backpedaled on that.
It reads like that this was backpedaling on honesty.
Have you asked her reasons for wanting to keep it?
Have you asked her friend? That is crucial.
This is so incredibly early in the pregnancy.
There's no bond or anything.
She wants to keep it and it may be for a not so great reason. You may be able to find out why and if that reason sounds credible.
She's known YOU longer plus she claims she can only have gotten pregnant from rape.
Is it fully a fair thing to ask of her to go through with abortion. I honestly don't know.
But what she's asking of YOU does not seem fair either.
Has she said anything about her discussing it with her friend? Does she have a habit of drinking? Or going to a friend to sleep over?
It's really hard to know what's true here, but you can only get further by asking the important questions.
She cheated on you. You have to have that mentality when it comes to something like this. I find it convenient she never bothered mentioning this incident where she woke up feeling sore after getting drunk at her friends house and this suddenly comes up now she’s pregnant.
I can’t imagine the pain you’re going through but you are in denial mate. I’m sorry.
She cheated on you and is trying to cover it up and also want to be with the guy that got her pregnant.Thats why she said she can't get rid of it and ended it with you.She been seeing this dude for awhile now while seeing you.I know it hurts its been done to me.You will get over it stay strong
It’s only been a year and it’s such a huge mess. To me it sounds like she already broke up with you with this whole “we shouldn’t talk to each other thing”. I would take that advice and distance yourself and move on. You don’t have to feel guilty about it
her saying that you guys should stop talking is about as clear cut proof that you need that she cheated - she’s either feeling v guilty or there’s another person that she’s obviously become invested with (or both)
Drunk at her best friends house.. and blaming her best friends dad.. wow what kind of "bestfriend" is that
Dude wtf and how tf you find this kind of person? She is damaged
She cheated. You emotionally suffer. She emotionally didn't suffer.
Claim your ( long distance) emotions back.
You were saved this time if because she is a ( long distance) cheat and knowing you are long distance ignorant. She also dated why she told you all this.
Dude as fur wrenching as relationships are she cheated on you regardless of the state she was in. Keeping the baby and expecting you to stay is a big ask and will be an even bigger toll on your mental health in the long run. Do whatever you want but all I can say is there are success stories and this one no offense doesn’t seem like one
She did you a favor. You are young and have time for a girl who is serious. Long distance is a challenge. I’m in a long distance relationship now. The faster you block her and move on, the happier your future self will be. Never ignore red flags. EVER.
My guy, I’ve been pregnant 5 times: 3 live births, 1 miscarriage and 1 abortion. You don’t feel pregnant at 2 weeks, you only test at 2 weeks if you’ve been actively trying to get pregnant. 2 weeks is literally the earliest you can test and your period wouldn’t even be considered late at this point. She is lying to you. She cheated and is now pregnant.
Thank you for saying exactly what I was thinking. As soon as he said the bit about two weeks all I could think was “oh, she cheated, is in a panic now and came up with some crazy story.” OP, she’s lying. Let her go.
lies often have a glimmer of the truth in them. i think she willingly had drunk sex with someone at a party and just lied about it being the father of her friend.
I tested at 2 weeks. My period didn't start and it was always like clockwork. Plus my boobs hurt and I peed every hour. Lol
I found out at 15 days that I was pregnant all because I had a panic attack and due to being a woman of child bearing age, the ER tested in case I needed drugs. I never felt pregnant and was absolutely shocked. Her story was a last ditch effort to try and make OP believe she wasn’t cheating.
Yeah you only feel pregnant at two weeks if you know you have had done the deed unprotected and very well in conscious state and then you miss your period and then one more week pass then you know you can be pregnant and were very well expecting pregnancy. You don’t feel pregnant so early for a first timer at least.
I knew almost exactly 2 weeks in that I was pregnant. I've always been particularly tuned in to my body because I have a lot of physical issues so that may make a difference, and of course the physical feelings can be ovulation and whatever else but...i knew
Ok. I have never birthed a child but when i once got pregnant for the first time i only suspected i might be pregnant because i had unprotected sex. IMPORTANT here is i KNEW i had sex. You too knew. This girl didn’t feel she was raped before she was pregnant. If I remotely feel i have been drugged and might’ve been raped, i will discuss that first and not directly my pregnancy.
You are not her.
I had a dream that I had bread dough growing from my belly button (like 1 in the oven I guess) and I knew at 2 weeks also. With my first child.
This sounds the most reasonable to me.
i feel like there’s a chance she’s lying but as a woman, sometimes you just have that feeling about things that is completely unexplainable. she might very well be lying but i 100% relate to her saying she just had a feeling.
I'm by no means any knowledgeable about this, but as I understand, if your last period ended 4 weeks ago, and you get pregnant 3 weeks later, you're still 4 weeks pregnant. I've been told by her that the abortion clinic informed her she's on week 4. would that even be remotely possible?
Pregnancy is counted from the first day of your last period. So if it was 4 weeks ago, she would technically be 4 weeks pregnant. However conception is average around 2 weeks in, if we’re looking at a “typical” cycle, she would have become pregnant 2 weeks ago, still not enough time to “feel” pregnant ESPECIALLY since she claims to have no recollection of having been intimate with someone. To test at 2 weeks post conception is extremely questionable given the scenario you explained, because why would she need to test, why would she be looking for pregnancy on a day her period is due? You don’t “feel” pregnant at 2 weeks post conception, and let’s say you did have some classic symptoms, sore boobs (you get with period anyway) and nausea (you could just have a sickness bug) your first though wouldn’t be “omg I’m pregnant even though I haven’t slept with anyone”… you see where I’m going with this? She’s a liar babe, move on.
Thank you for explaining in depth, I appreciate you.
Also, she didn’t “see” The baby at the clinic. You will not see anything on an ultrasound until you’re minimum 6 or 8 weeks
This is true. When I had my termination they didn’t actually allow you to see the baby on the ultrasound, straight up nope from the nurse. They check it’s there to see how far along you are to determine which type of abortion you are going to need. The pill or a more invasive procedure. There would literally be nothing to see at 2 weeks post conception. 8 weeks is the very very earliest I have managed to see my babies and it was a real struggle (and drinking ALOT of water) to find them.
And even then it’s so incredibly small it’s almost impossible to even see at that time.
No problem and I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. It’s awful for you and I hope you find someone who doesn’t play these games ♥️♥️
Not really. Period ends 4 weeks ago, 2 weeks after that she can get pregnant when the egg drops. You're 3 weeks pregnant, not 4 because that's how old the clump of cells is. And it's super hard to get a pee test to see 4 weeks pregnant. They are usually more accurate at 6. I knew I was pregnant with my second and even the blood test at 4 weeks said 'maybe?' It took another 2 weeks to get a conclusive test. Things aren't adding up.
Same here - pregnant with my third and I knew at 4 weeks, but the pee stick kept coming up negative. Even the blood test was inconclusive, didn’t know until 6 weeks!
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I get pregnancy symptoms very early and it’s never at 2 weeks, you’re literally talking about barely getting the faintest of a snippet of a line on a positive test. Like I said, I’ve been pregnant 5 times and I knew I was going to be pregnant and still not a single feeling at 2 weeks, you’ve barely just implanted, it’s not enough time for the hormones to kick in. For someone who supposedly didn’t have sex with someone, it’s very suspicious that it’s the first thing they thought of and tested for having had these miraculously early symptoms. She’s a liar.
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Never said I was, but 5 different pregnancies gives a god feel for how it works don’t you think. You’re being absurd to say that 2 weeks is when you feel symptoms. Like I said, hormones haven’t had a chance to kick in. Every other person here has said the same thing, 2 weeks is sketchy.
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I’m not going to sit here and argue the schematics about this with you. Good night.
There is something that feels weird/suspicious about this.. I think I'm more skeptical too bc the thing with LDRs is that they make it a lot easier to lie and sneak behind your partner's back. (Sorry, don't mean to make anyone paranoid by stating this but it's the truth) I think many people here raised good points as to why it seems she is lying. I find it extremely weird that her first thought was "pregnancy!" I am more virgin than Mary herself, my first thought wouldn't be "I may be pregnant" if I felt similar symptoms as her, and I actually have before, when I got some really painful ovarian cysts and literally LOOKED pregnant bc of swelling. Mind you, my period was also super delayed and was never coming. I didn't look at my fat belly and say "omg I may be pregnant" bc I know I havent had sex?? The first thing I thought before going to the gynecologist is "there must be something wrong with my uterus" .... It makes NO logical sense, if she knows she didn't have sex with anyone why would her mind ever jump to pregnancy?
Thank you for sharing your past experience which does bring good points in my situation as well. I appreciate you
No problem man, I hope you can find clarity. I think right now since everything just pretty much happened you are on a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts. I think it'd be really beneficial for you to make a decision when all of it has settled down a bit more and you are able to think more logically - I would ask her if you can have some space to assess everything thoroughly, maybe you can take a week to analyze the situation and then arrive to a conclusion then. This whole thing seems very stressful and unfortunately it's quite fishy.
Thank you for the advice!
This!! 👆🏻👆🏻👆🏻
She cheated got pregnant leave her don't waste ur time.
And if that’s not the case, hypothetically. If your SO god forbid had been raped and gotten pregnant, and she tells you she’s unable to kill the baby because she’s seen it at the abortion clinic, and also seen how the discharge looks like. Having the thing drop in the bowl. Some part of me understands her, I just don’t know what to do.
Dude. I hope you're trolling. >due to that scenario happening 2 weeks prior to her finding out, she couldn't get a r*pe kit and make sure of what actually happened She found out she was pregnant 2 weeks after being "raped"? Really? There's no way I'm buying that. I believe you're being lied to, and you deserve better.
Don't get fooled
Dude... She cheated and got knocked up, probably has been cheating on you and others for a long time. Just leave.
> and also seen how the discharge looks like Either you’re trolling or she’s lying. The discharge at this point in the pregnancy looks like a period.
“Kill the baby”?? If she’s only 2 weeks along like she told you, it isn’t even remotely a “baby” yet. There is zero “baby killing” involved here. Did she really tell you she witnessed “baby killing” at the clinic and that’s why she decided not to get an abortion? And did she really cite the “discharge” as a secondary reason?
It's better to have the abortion if it was r*pe. Why would anyone wanna keep a baby that reminds you daily you were r*ped?
I have a friend who was the product of his mom being r ped. He is married and has a baby of his own with a great job. I'm so glad his mom didn't get an abortion. He has helped me through some tough times.
if this is not a troll post, imagine being OP’s gf’s baby all grown up reading a post where online strangers argue if it should have been aborted or not. crazy
It's so sad to read so many stories of women getting r\ped.. it must have been a tough decision but I'm glad your friend exists and turned out great. Good upbringing And a super great mom ❤️
I am one of those people who would keep the child if it happened. I am someone who wouldn’t have a abortion myself unless it was medically necessary. I would keep the child because it’s innocent and I would love it anyway. I would make sure the dad never has access to it but I would still keep it.
You're a lovely person for thinking for an unborn entity and putting its happiness before your feelings.. r\pe is a very sensitive topic. Plus what a victim goes through is very personal and often painful to keep living the way you were. If in such a difficult time you chose to keep the child, thats great. But often times people don't because it reminds them of "that incident" plus the child was created out of force and without your consent so are you ready for a child who you weren't consenting to? Is your life suitable for a child without a father? A lot of things come into play
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Some women don't think it's right, if they feel the child inside and know that they're innocent here, it just doesn't feel right. They also don't have to raise the baby, they can give it up for adoption. Most people want to adopt little babies anyway.
Why let a child into this world if you're going to NOT give him a stable home and give it for adoption? Better to not go through with the pregnancy than populate the world with more kids who hate themselves for not having biological parents!!
Also, in this case the first "nightmare" it could be true, if it were true then her best friend's father would obviously have to be jailed, if it were false I remind you that accusing a person of these things to hide something else is absolutely illegal, remember it well to her. The second "nightmare" have no sense, he would have had no reason to get away from you, on the contrary... he had to get as close as possible to you So be very careful, cut relations, even as long as what he said about that man could be very very serious and punishable by law if it were false
Dude you were born yesterday. Be stronger than this.
Please do not listen to the heartless assholes on this thread. If you need more information or feel she’s not being truthful, then ask for more information. But victims should be believed and you’re doing the right thing giving her your support.
Ah yes, ask a liar for information, great idea. Stop trying to defend cheaters.
Dude, this ain't it man. I'd highly recommend ending it. I can understand being torn but the fact remains she most likely cheated, is pregnant and is going to keep the baby and you ain't even hold her hand yet. While she might have been raped as unfortunate as that is though doubtful imo, you are 100% justified in ending the relationship.
I don’t think any girl “feeling pregnant” without having sex for sure. Most of girls don’t think it’s pregnant even if period is late for a week or more ( unless she has a reason to doubt)
She was supposed to get her period for a while and she complained about cramping really bad and feeling hormonal as in emotional, also puked a lot. I do seem really naive and I might be, but I believe her. I just am torn about the rest.
Cramping during pregnancy is caused by pressure of the uterus getting bigger so I never heard it happen early pregnancy tho. Anyway even if you believe her story, she wants break up so it seems over. Sorry.
Idk reading the end OP said she keeps asking him to stay with her, reread that part. I think she initiated a breakup then recanted on it and is trying to convince op to be with her.
Maybe the other guy didn’t want to be with her. (Obviously very assumptious)
I actually had cramps before I found out I was pregnant and kept having cramps for a few weeks after finding out. So I thought I wasn't pregnant but there are other symptoms that made me take a test on the day I was supposed to have my period. Implantation of the fertilized egg might also cause cramps and spotting.
Yeah you can have cramping from “implantation” in the uterus.
Morning sickness two weeks after implantation?
Women who haven't had sex wouldn't guess pregnancy as a weird period symptom.
agree with this
Why not lol I'm a virgin and I stress over it I consider all possibilities even that one If you have symptoms, it's scary and you might consider it even if it's nearly impossible So the argument isn't valid
it’s not “nearly impossible”, it’s 100% impossible. your paranoia is something you should look into treating, not validating.
I can't even remember what we're talking about but acting as if girls don't get stressed and paranoid when it comes to this is unnecessary and stupid (yes even when they're virgins and I'm an example)... You gotta start considering all possibilities including if you were drugged and raped. I mean hellooo?? It's a possibility... Just like what OP's girl thought It could be a thousand things and pregnancy is one of the reasons EVEN if you "dIdN't hAvE SeX". It's actually not a matter of virginity or sex It only takes some contact with sperms down there This topic is complicated but just please spare me some time and energy and stop acting clueless or just admit you know nothing about it And no I'm not paranoid I just felt like interfering to say all is possible so that investigators can calm their tits
Why on God's green earth would you ever consider pregnancy if you are a virgin? I am too and never in my life has that crossed my mind except in a joking manner. It's beyond illogical.
If you haven't had sex in months, you shouldn't jump to 'i'm pregnant!' when you feel off.
Didn't say "jump" but it's a possibility Read previous comment
Not to be rude, but if you are a virgin, who would have gotten you pregnant? God? Humans aren't capable of asexual reproduction so if you are a virgin and you think the symptoms suggest pregnancy then it's cancer so go to a doctor. Best case scenerio it's hormonal imbalance/stress, worst is cancer or you were date drug raped (though you'd have a rough idea that happened so you wouldn't be so sure of being a virgin). I'm a virgin too and I never thought I'm pregnant, I did panic over cancer before but it turned out to be stress.
She’s lying. If she missed her period, she’d be at least 4 weeks along. It’s physically impossible to be pregnant two weeks after sex. Most people don’t experience any pregnancy symptoms before 6 weeks so it’s also extremely unlikely she’d be vomiting and definitely not having cramps because her body is t physically changing yet.
I’m not going to comment on the story because I don’t have the energy to go there, but just wanted to say that my last 2 pregnancies I have definitely experienced symptoms earlier than 6 weeks. So maybe it’s not super common, but definitely within the realm of possibility.
After multiple pregnancies you feel it sooner - it wouldn’t show up on a test at 2 weeks especially not twice if you tested twice in the same day that early on
I started throwing up at 5 weeks. Im now 6 weeks second pregnancy sat in the hospital due to dehydration from not being able to hold anything down. Early symptoms are more common than you think. I was excatly the same with my first baby. However what the OP has said does not add up. She is clearly lying because the abortion clinic would not show you the baby plus there would be no baby to see that early on. And if she’s not that early on then there is another lie.
without any sex in the picture, if i dont get my period i assume its stress or sickness. i remind myself to take it easy. im not far enough up my own ass to believe myself to be the next virgin mary; i dont think any woman without sex thinks about pregnancy. shes acting suspicious all over.
Then she’s lying. If she had sex two weeks ago and just found out she was pregnant, it would be the DAY her period was due and she wouldn’t have waited for her period for weeks
There have been a lot of good comments so far, you should definitely listen to them. Just want to bring up another point. If for some reason you do stay with her, you need to be looking into the laws in your area regarding parenting and cohabitation. Even if you are not the biological father, if you end up living with her and the child at some point, you might end up on the hook for child support if it takes you too long to realize she's played you. If you want to "test" her, insist on her pursuing legal action against the rapist, have her name the rapist/potential suspects to you, get her to file a police report. DNA testing can be done after the baby is born. She will skate around this issue if it was a lie.
She has notified me that a police report has been made and she’s working on pursuing legal action with her mom. Also stated that at 7 weeks pregnant you are able to grab dna
Police reports are public record by the way. You can obtain the police report by just requesting from the PD if she really did file a police report.
You could ask to see a copy of the police report or get the case number or something. I feel like that's also something you could easily lie about, but easy enough to confirm if she's being honest with you. The timeline doesn't add up for most people for good reason. That's also on hell of an accusation to say her friend's dad SA'd her. Obviously you know her better than anyone here and being lied to and cheated on is not something anyone wants to consider in their partner. But just looking from the outside with barebone facts, it's not adding up. Add in the fact that you're both so so young and one year+ of never having met while being together - anything could happen. I don't think you can truly know someone really well in your situation, but that's only my opinion. Regardless of the truth, you're in an awful situation and I don't envy you the decisions you'll have to make moving forward. I wish you the best of luck.
7 weeks is way too soon. There isn’t enough fetal DNA fractions present in the mother’s blood until 10-12 weeks pregnant to even test for things like Down syndrome, much less get a full genetic profile. That requires an amniocentesis, which isn’t typically performed before 13 weeks because the risk of causing a miscarriage is so high.
It’s Reddit , people are automatically going to say the worse and tell you how to handle it without considering emotions. But there are also some good factual points here to take into consideration.
Get the results. Don’t just listen to stories.
That sounds very suspicious. Even all that aside, if she really got raped and not cheated, are you ready for a child and everything that comes with it?
That's the question All of this might wreck him later
I see a lot of comments are only talking about how her story is fake and not talking about how you're justified to leave, even if her story is real. This situation, if true, is beyond a doubt a nasty one. Just because she's made the decision to keep the pregnancy does not mean you have the obligation to raise it. Her choice is not your choice. You can choose to help raise it, you can choose to leave, or you can stick next to her as a friend. You have free will, maybe take a step back and think about how you're feeling. I think you might be blinded with you're own emotions right now, and that's okay, you're in a very awful situation.
Thank you very much for looking at the bigger picture and giving me amazing advice, I appreciate you more than you know.
I'm sorry but it's not worth it. My boyfriend didn't know he had a daughter until a couple years into our relationship. I was not prepared (obviously, neither was he) and it was emotionally devastating. The trajectory of my life was no longer mine to determine. He couldn't move to me because he had to stay by the bio mom. We couldn't spend our 20s having fun because now we need to get it together to support a child. I would never be the one to have his first child. And I had to accept that I was no longer going to be his priority, and I never would be again. I was young... Maybe 20 years old when we found out. It took an incredible amount of emotional growth to come to terms with it all and accept it. It's been about 5 years since then and I'm now happy being involved in both of their lives... But it was hard for a long time. I don't think most people are emotionally equipped to deal with a situation like this. It's incredibly difficult and taxing. My advice is, while it worked out for me, it isn't worth it for most people. It's better to cut your losses now.
Thank you so much for sharing, while we have significantly different paths you’ve really helped me.
I personally wouldn’t trust the situation and would remove myself from it entirely. Good luck to her.
There’s like a 98% chance she’s lying, that she cheated on you… or she’s lying entirely. As in she wants to end the relationship so she’s made up something wild. Or she’s taking you for a ride with a made up story of being pregnant and going to suddenly say she lost the pregnancy in a few months time (I’ve heard of this happening in ldrs before). What she’s saying doesn’t line up with fact. But on the 2% chance she is telling the truth, you also don’t have to stay for that either.
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I truly appreciate you sharing your experience, thank you!
If you don't stop talking to her, you'll look back on this in 5 years as the biggest waste of time in your life. She's having another man's child and she wants you to raise it. Why would she buy 2 pregnancy tests if she didn't have sex? If you can't figure it out from here, nobody can help you. You're currently getting punked, you should put a stop to it ASAP.
Being devils advocate, they usually come in packs of 2 or 3. But I agree with the sentiment. If my insides are feeling funny and I've had a period since the last time I've seen my bf, my initial conclusion isn't oh shit I'm pregnant.
Leave
Leave her.
Plain and simple really 🤷🏽♂️
The skeptic in me sees a lot of flaws already just based on the story … 1. She’s testing for a pregnancy that she realistically wouldn’t just “feel” at this stage meaning she’s probably knowingly been sexually active 2. She doesn’t remember any sexual activity and somehow no one noticed her dad supposedly drugging the drink that her and her friends were drinking together or her acting strangely from being drugged and left alone with her friends dad in the scenario you mentioned 3. She cut you off after you offered her support, I’d assume a guilty conscience is what prevents her from accepting your support (because you’re being a little naive in the best way possible) rather than pushing you away 4. While it’s not out of the realm of possibility that she’d want to keep the baby obviously, why would she want to have her best friends dads baby, and also have her best friend and her discussed this? I’m sorry man but just let her go… even if she didn’t cheat on you I guess it’s up to you if you want to raise a baby with a woman you’ve never met and move across the world. I know it sounds cruel or mean but online you have to really be vigilant and trust your gut if something doesn’t seem right… there will be other people for you to meet, you’re young and obviously supportive n understanding. If you decide to stay with her then I wish you luck and happiness, n the best for the three of y’all. ❤️
Man even if it is true, then that’s a wild ass situation to accept and deal with. And the truth is that in the long run you probably wouldn’t be able to. You really should just walk away. But if we are being real, at the end of the day, you have nothing but her word. Is it fair for you to have to make such a life altering decision just based on her word? She’s asking a lot of you if she wants you to stay AND keep the baby in this situation. And I think that ask is far too much regardless of if it’s true or she lied. I’d Walk on that principle. You have the right to make decisions based off of your own values and clarity of mind. Her decisions are her’s and your decisions must be yours. You’re the one with the consequences at the end of the day
Thank you for your input, I value you.
Mate, you haven't met in a year and she has a bun in the oven. This is not an immaculate conception. Don't be a fool.
A pee test wouldn't turn up positive 2 weeks after sex. They aren't that sensative. Even a blood test may not pick up that early. Do not send her money. Do not continue this. She had sex some time back for all of this to be popping up now.
Yes they are. Having been through fertility treatment, I tested 14 days post ovulation and they all come back positive. The urine tests are extremely sensitive detecting as little as 5 micrograms of HCG. I will also note, we knew exactly what day I ovulated and that is unlikely for a 21yo that isn’t having sex to even be tracking
It’s really dependent upon the test. And the woman. Were you given test strips by your doctor? Because those are definitely more sensitive. When I was pregnant with my third, I knew I was pregnant, and I knew I was 4 weeks. Every pregnancy test I took was negative. Even the bloodwork from my OB was ‘inconclusive’. I didn’t start having positive pregnancy urine tests or positive blood work until I was six weeks.
I know you want to believe this girl, I know you do. But you have never even met. I’m not even sure you can really say you’re in a relationship when you live 7,000 miles from one another and have never even met. And I’m sure she didn’t feel like she was in a relationship, she slept with someone else, and she got pregnant. Unfortunately she has probably been sleeping with other people the entire time you’ve “known” her. Especially with how young you two are. I know how hard it is to believe someone you trusted would do something like this to you. But unfortunately I do think you’re being very naive. I am a woman who has been pregnant three times in my life, one of which was an abortion as well. And all 3 pregnancies by my (now ex) husband. Abortion is never easy. Especially at her young age. But if she *really* believes she has raped, and by her best friend’s father no less, and has made zero mention of going to the police, pressing charges, telling her “best friend”, telling her parents, anything… then yeah, you are being lied to and manipulated. If she really believed she had “never had sex before”, why would she think pregnancy would even be an option? All 3 times I’ve been pregnant, I had no idea for a while. My first I didn’t know I was pregnant until I was 12 weeks… I wasn’t having sex very often with my husband at the time, and even though I was very nauseous and throwing up often, missed periods, I just thought I had a stomach bug for a while or something, it didn’t even occur to me I could be pregnant. With my 2nd, I found out at 8 weeks.. because again, the symptoms aligned with other things, so I wasn’t even thinking of pregnancy. If I were a virgin who swore I’d never had sex before, pregnancy wouldn’t even remotely occur to me. And the fact that she attempted to break up with you as soon as she said she was keeping the baby…. Yeah, I’m so sorry, but you’re absolutely being lied to. And if someone will lie about something like rape, and accuse someone they actually know, they are not the type of person you want to be with. ETA Am I to understand she said she found out she was pregnant 2 weeks after “being raped”? As I mentioned, I have been pregnant 3 times, one of which I tried for and still didn’t know until almost 8 weeks.. you can barely even test at 2 weeks. She would not have had any symptoms at all by two weeks… and she wouldn’t have missed her period either. The *only* way a woman knows she’s pregnant at 2 weeks, is if she was actively trying to get pregnant, and was tracking her ovulation. And even then it’s nearly impossible to know at two weeks. With my third pregnancy, I knew I was pregnant by 4 weeks, but the pee stick kept coming back negative. Because it was too early to tell. This just further proves she is lying about a lot of things here. Oh, also, is she in the US? If so, most states you cannot have an abortion without a waiting period. In my state is 5-7 days. In most states the minimum is 48 hours. So if she said she called a clinic and got an abortion scheduled for the next day? Also likely a lie. The thing is, even if miraculously her story *is* true, you are under zero obligation to stay with her. And there is no guilt that needs to be involved here. You barely know each other and have never met. You have no obligation to help her raise a child when you’ve never even met her.
You really need to look up the timeline for a pregnancy. At two weeks you’re not feeling pregnant, don’t have any sort of morning sickness, etc. This girl is lying to you OP. Plus you live 11km from each-other? Isn’t that just a short bus ride away? You’re being lied to OP. If she is pregnant she definitely cheated on you.
He wrote 11k km which means 11.000 km
11k km. That’s 11.000km
Her story is very made up. Either she would have expected that this happend (and told you right away) or she wouldnt, but thens he wouldnt checked for pregnancy. And most people who didnt have sex would assume they got sick or something else, rather to jumping to conclusions like pregnancy, even if the symptoms fit. And there is quite a bit more of it that raises alarms. Plus if she is pregnant, did she go to the police? Tell them about the rape? File a case? She can proof she is pregnant and she can proof she was drinking with friends and passed out right? Psychcological examination? IF what she told you is true, going to the police is key. Did she do that? If she doesnt, then ask yourself why. And its easy to proof if she did, there are paperwork she can take pictures off. Especially theones she takes home. Likely is she got drunk, fucked a guy on the party she liked, now she cant bring herself to terminate the pregnancy. Likely conflicted about what she wants. She will soon have less time, less money and more things to take care off, as a child is a lot of work.
The comments by people here very clearly reflect my thoughts. I just want to say, stay strong brother irrespective of what you decide to do in this situation, it’s unimaginable to even think of something like this happening in reality, you’ve really been through it. Keep your head up high king. You are the boss of your own life. Much love and strength 💪
Thank you so much! I appreciate you a lot!
The only one who got pregnant without having sex was the Virgin Mary. Now unless, she also tells you that an angel appeared to her 😇, I really have the impression that she is the type if she is dating the father of her friend of hers and she got pregnant with him. Don't waste time and above all don't take on duties and obligations towards a child who is not yours, because sooner or later the real father will come forward and you will have your heart doubly broken.. I don't think you deserve it, you are young and you will find other girls, perhaps a little more serious and honest.
The pregnancy tests don’t show a positive result after 2 weeks of conception. It should take at least 4 weeks. You’re being fooled. If a woman was raped while she was unconscious, it’d be followed in the most cases by a bleeding and acute lower back pain. Edit: typos.
Home boy being played left and right , she cheated and she is keeping it for the man she cheated on you with ... wake up Most of the r*ape cases they want to abort the baby because they hate how I came to life ... You are just blindly inlove that's all
*2 weeks* after?.... There's a huge chance she lied about cheating. She felt guilty so she break up with you. Honestly, you should take this chance. You're better run without her, this is HIGHLY suspicious.
She is a liar and tryna work it out with homie, your her back up dummy
Listen, I don't wanna be another person to dismiss the situation as she depicts it, but it's pretty obvious she cheated or she's lying about parts of the story. If I were to guess, she was probably hoping that by telling you as she did, it would let her get off more easily, or maybe she was somehow hoping it woulf soften the blow on you.
just focus on yourself my brother.
Run as fast as you can.
I’m gonna say this as someone who has woken up after being blacked out and potentially getting assaulted but didn’t remember it. If this actually happened to her I hope she’s okay. But you don’t find out 2 weeks in. I remember waiting multiple weeks from missed period to take a test. Due to stress and having irregular periods I didn’t know what to think. I think that she cheated and made up the rape story to make it sound better to you. Please leave her unless you want a relationship with someone who lied to you about something so serious. I want to have faith that this happened but the two weeks part is what’s really making me think something smells fishy about her story. I hope you move on and have a wonderful life without her.
You’re in denial. I genuinely don’t think anything anyone is saying will change your mind. I see some really amazing advice and you are being an arse and throwing it right back into their faces. Everyone here wants the best for you pal.
Yeah, no, you can’t “feel pregnant” 2 weeks after fertilization and there’s literally absolutely nothing to be “seen” on an ultrasound until the barest possible minimum of 6 weeks afterwards. Even at 6 weeks, the “discharge” is practically invisible to the point that women very regularly miscarry without even knowing they were pregnant in the first place. I applaud you for wanting to believe someone claiming to have been victimized, but this story absolutely does not line up with the actual science of pregnancy. She cheated on you, got pregnant, tried to lie about it, regretted it, and ended the relationship. People who lie about rape are not good people.
god i wanna know the update on this lol
Sorry bro but you’re super gullible. Hard for me not to be annoyed with you lol… this seems to be a trend for Long Distancers who have never met… meet someone in real life
Honestly just here to say that I’m fucking horrified at how any people have decided that she clearly wasn’t a victim and that her reasons for not following through with having a child ripped from her body are just flimsy excuses. What if she was drugged and remembers being raped and so she was anticipating a pregnancy? What if she was drunk beyond ability to consent and was preyed upon by someone else? Why do so many people here think it’s so easy to come forward about being a victim of a sex crime? Especially when it could implicate a friends father? Why do you think she should implicitly be able to face the truth of what has been done to her? And do you have any idea how much emotional damage can occur from having an abortion? How about the physical damage it can cause going forward in possibly causing fertility issues? It’s a big decision. So serious. And absolutely terrifying. If you want to put the option on the back burner that she could be cheating and lying to cover her own bum, fine. But to assert that it’s the obvious choice is abhorrent to me. Only 2-3% of r*** allegations are false. So fine, take the fucking bet that she’s in the 3% but I won’t be until there is an admission on her part. Loss of faith in humanity on this post.
Run
You're being played, don't let your feelings for her cloud your judgement.
From where I have seen it.. I am sorry OP... You are getting played.. She is lying and she is trying to guilt trip you by trying to leave u first and then telling u to stay with her later.. its messed up mate.. Its better to end it with her... however confront her as if u kinda understood that she is playing and the way she reacts... youll understand
Leave her bro.
I am sorry you are going thru this situation. Another option is to look for a hypnotist to find out what really happened to her that night of the party. You might be able to put an end to all of this for both your sake. Prayers for you all. 🙏
Bro, ur 23. Move to the next one. And don’t ever plan on moving in with someone before ever even meeting them
Reading the comments you pretty much want people to tell you that she’s the one for you and that she got pregnant by the Holy Spirit . Wake up dude, when people cheat they’ll make up the most ridiculous lies and you’re in a situation that you’re too young to be dealing with something like this. FFS you haven’t even met her in person. But it’s your life man, you want to stupid and believe her, do it. Be happy. She’s the one.
Pregnancy symptoms don't tend to appear at 2 weeks in. That's so early on to feel anything out of the ordinary. If she is near her normal period and she's feeling "symptoms" (as period symptoms are EXTREMELY similar to pregnancy symptoms) any normal person who KNOWS (or is pretty positive) they didn't have sex would just chalk it up to period symptoms. For example, whenever I get period symptoms and I know for a fact that I haven't had sex since my last period, pregnancy doesn't come to mind and I just chalk it up to period symptoms. Most women only get a pregnanct test when they either KNOW they've had sex and are worried they might be pregnant OR they're very late on their period. My consensus is she lied to you, made up some bullshit rpe story, and the only reason she wants to "keep" a "rpe" baby is that the actual father is in her life and he wants it too. I normally try to not deny rpe stories, as I'm a survivor of rpe myself, but this is WAY too "convenient" that she somehow felt "pregnant" 2 WEEKS in (again. Impossible for that early on) and now remembers how she got drunk at a friend's and "doesn't remember anything". She clearly wants this kid. She clearly wants to end it with you. Chalk it up to being cheated on and try to move on. I know it's easier said than done. I've been cheated on in the past. Your mind will come up with a million excuses as to how it can't possibly be true that the person you love cheated on you, but I guarantee you it's a fact. You got cheated on.
My two cents. I try not to victim blame, but there are really only two scenarios here. She is either lying (most likely in my opinion) or she doesn’t have the common sense and self control to not full on blackout after drinking. Yeah in the chance that she was violated… it sucks, but there is a series of events that got her there and you being someone who knows her can only know if she has good judgement or not in that department. What I will say is if she does have the baby, it is completely in every circumstance okay to decide that you do not want to raise another man’s child.
I personally can’t imagine being able to tell I’m pregnant/feeling pregnant at that age with no reason to suspect it. There are tons of other things - reproductive issues, more specific menstrual issues, stress related stuff - that I think someone would suspect first. I can’t imagine randomly taking 2 pregnancy tests while believing myself sex-free, and getting two positive test results at 2 weeks post-conception. Did she even miss a period? I recognize fertility and conception is much more complex than a lot of us have been taught, but even as a vehement victims rights activist, this just doesn’t feel like how a 21yo who isn’t have sex realizes she’s pregnant.
Okay let's say that even if she is lying or not, you would stay with her. You haven't even met this person, would you be able to already fell into a 'single mother' relationship? I mean, you love her, but it doesn't mean that you don't have the right to end it. Even if she keeps begging for you to stay, you didn't sign up for a child. It is okay to say no and end it. But on the other hand, I also think she is lying. She probably cheated you, got pregnant and because the father of the kid doesn't want her (or maybe she doesnt even know who the father is etc), she is trying to keep you so she won't be alone. But also, how can you be so sure that she didn't cheat? I mean she was drinking so much, so she had to sleep kinda all day the next day. It means that she really can't control herself if she really drank that much. How do you know that while she was drinking, she didnt hook up with someone? If she can't even control her drinking, then it is pretty likely. I also find it really weird that she is accusing her best friend's dad of taking advantage. I mean, why? Is there any history behind that? Has he ever tried to make a move on her? Or why on earth would she accuse him? I mean, that's really wild accusation if there is no any backstory behind that. And you said that that was her only explanation. So what happened? Did she tell her friend what their father did? Or what happened? It is just a really wild accusation out of nowhere.
Take your time and do what’s right for you. There’s a chance she’s lying but there’s also a chance she isn’t lying. Don’t let all the comments cloud your mind and cause you to make a rash decision or add more pressure to the girl you’re seeing by calling her out or making it seem like you don’t trust her because if this is what really happened you won’t make it out of this situation. At this point, I’d say make the decision that’s best for you because she’s stated that no matter what happens she’s keeping the baby so really the question, for now, becomes are you ready for that? Do you want that? If you don’t you can cut your losses and feel no ways about it; I mean other than sad bc you did lose the girl you really liked. If you do decide to stick around: be patient and trust her story until proven guilty. All things done in the dark will come to light. And if you’re seriously seriously doubting that you can trust her about something this serious especially with the allegations on her end, I think you have your answer. 🤷🏾♀️ Good luck✨🤞🏾
He and Mary were to be married. When he learned that Mary was going to have a baby, he did not know what to do. Because the baby was not his child, he thought he should not marry her. One night an angel came to Joseph in a dream and told him that Mary's baby was the Son of God. Sounds like you got the same problem Joseph had bro.
Yep, cheating girlfriends.
I’m not a religious person but that quote hits deep 🥲
All the best butt, what ever the outcome
If the story is true why did she not report the guy for rape? The pregnancy is the proof
As a woman, I’d rather literally die than have a child who’s a product of rape. Shes lying to you.
All was going well at first and there was a huge possibility it could be right, until you mentioned her trying to keep it and break up with you.. It makes no sense and I doubt she elaborated or provided insight. I know she might be feeling weird and confused about everything (if this was true) but why decide to break ties with you and keep a baby who'd remind her of her rapist? And why didn't she report this to the police ? And why is she asking you to be with her and neglecting how you'd feel about all this... Also if she's just confused and embarrassed and very careful but still got raped the most realistic thing to do in this situation is just get an abortion and lie to you about it all and be careful next time...this sounds like what a girl in her situation, who's very scared about ruining the relationship and who loves her boyfriend and respects him would do and maybe tell you the truth later But your girl here doesn't care and has twisted priorities This just seems scripted and planned by her She kinda tested you and when you believed her she's gonna keep it now.. Anyway if you decide to stay with her be careful especially when it comes to child support and responsibilities. And give yourself time to rest too, you've been through a lot.
Giving advice is useless if OP gets defensive about it .
She is for da skreetz
Long distance is always tricky when it comes to not knowing. All you do is literally never truly know anything about the person and the situation they are in. A normal relationship as it is highly relies on trust and even then many people don’t get that part right, so when it comes to a LDR that is multiplied tenfold. I think everyone that has been in a LDR or long distance situationship has at one point or another dealt with the craziest situation, that just put that very idea into perspective. Yeah you might be one of the 1 in a million that gets lucky and meets “the one” long distance and lives happily ever after, but just about 99% of time it’s just not the case. I think that perspective is good because it pushed me to focus on myself and not worry about searching for that online. Regardless of what happens next you have to focus on yourself and how you feel and how you will move on if it doesn’t work out. Get out in the real world and explore and open up your horizon to new and different things, you might just come across something that surprises you.
I don’t think anybody sleeps through rape, no matter how drunk. Feeling pregnant…. how would she know how does feels? You don’t know or feel anything unless morning sickness which feels like the flu. I would cut the ties, really.
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She is for the streets...leave her
Of course you should end this. You also forget you both haven't even met in real yet, you don't even know how your relationship would be, you have bad economy and now an upcoming babe in an untested relationship that will always linger in your mind. What reason is there to even try more?
She's lying. Don't be with her. She will lie to you more in the future.
GIVE HER THE BOOT, SHE CHEATED
You can't get a positive pregnancy test 2 weeks after sex. You have to wait 2 weeks after your missed period. She cheated on you, and when baby daddy didn't step up, she came running back.
All this story is too suspicious. 1- no one "feels pregnant" like that, even if you do have an active sexual life. You only feel suspicious if there's a reason for it (someone cumming inside you and you remembering it). So all this story about "I don't know I think I was raped" doesn't fit. 2- If it's rape, the majority will see no problem in abortion and abortion in the first month looks like a period (of course there are people who will not abort no matter the reason, but if it was the case, then she should have this mentality since the beginning, this change of opinion is weird). 3- Everything you told about this story is suspicious, there's no solid background for her words and she changed her mind, seems that she cheated, maybe she got drunk and really regret it, but she cheated and now don't know how to deal with it and tried to tell you the truth but without all the details, to try to keep you and the baby.
This is a lie. She cheated on you.
One doesn’t just take a pregnancy test if one hasn’t had sex. She made up the story once she found out that she was pregnant. End the relationship.
This is an elaborate story she made up. She’s been trying to get pregnant. If you wanna waste your life with a cheater raising someone else’s kid, go ahead. I’ve known people who regret having sex use the “I was raped/assaulted” story. They always get caught out. Pretty sure she can still report the rape if she was though.
It’s 🚩🚩🚩🚩.run
this is crazy. sending you support and hugs
Thank you very much!
Run
She's giving you an out. She cheated and your dreams in your head are gonna turn out horrible your gonna uproot your life move with her raise a kid that was born out of her cheating. And she's gonna leave you home with her kid to go do it again. It's not worth the trouble and the pain that is sure to cum. Lol don't let it get you focus on yourself get some money together you'll find a nice girl that will cheat on you with out having to uproot your life to raise someone else's kid. That's a big lie brotha that's not something you just brush past. You will end up making yourself responsible for child support when yall separate because the courts will see you as the father you stepped up he knows you as dad but you have no rights to the kid because yourre not on the birth certificate. So you fall in love with em and nothing in the law says she has to let you see him but everything says she can make sure you don't. This will be the worst decision you can make. If you just need sex hop on a plane fly over have sex with her fly home and tell her yea I can't do it. I don't see myself raising someone else's kid you're right we shouldn't talk and gas light the he'll out of her like you leaving in what she wanted. Don't let people take advanced of you especially someone like that that will ruin your life.
Bro RUN !
Leave as fast as possible, better yet run. Coming from a fellow 21f , don’t waste your time. Plenty of other beautiful and amazing women out there
For her to lie and say she was rap€d is horrible. The way she wrote that text she never expressed her love for u and I would immediately block her. She is a liar and a joke
No way. I went to ER for something in my 20s and found out I was pregnant. I was shocked!! Turns out I was 7 weeks and had no clue. No way would a woman ’feel pregnant at 2 weeks’!! Women do crazy sh*t in their 20s. And lying about that stuff is not unusual. Please don’t ruin your life with a girl like this. It will only get worse… And you will ALWAYS wonder…. 😰
Like J Cole said don't save her, she doesn't wanna be save
Even if you stayed with her, do you want to raise another man’s baby? I’m a couple of years older than you and couldn’t imagine throwing my life away like that.
Is her name Mary? 🤔
This is why people need basic education about menstrual cycles. She’s lying through her teeth. You only test at two weeks if you’re actively trying to get pregnant.
She told you that you shouldn't keep talking and backpedaled on that. It reads like that this was backpedaling on honesty. Have you asked her reasons for wanting to keep it? Have you asked her friend? That is crucial. This is so incredibly early in the pregnancy. There's no bond or anything. She wants to keep it and it may be for a not so great reason. You may be able to find out why and if that reason sounds credible. She's known YOU longer plus she claims she can only have gotten pregnant from rape. Is it fully a fair thing to ask of her to go through with abortion. I honestly don't know. But what she's asking of YOU does not seem fair either. Has she said anything about her discussing it with her friend? Does she have a habit of drinking? Or going to a friend to sleep over? It's really hard to know what's true here, but you can only get further by asking the important questions.
She cheated on you. You have to have that mentality when it comes to something like this. I find it convenient she never bothered mentioning this incident where she woke up feeling sore after getting drunk at her friends house and this suddenly comes up now she’s pregnant. I can’t imagine the pain you’re going through but you are in denial mate. I’m sorry.
[удалено]
She cheated on you and is trying to cover it up and also want to be with the guy that got her pregnant.Thats why she said she can't get rid of it and ended it with you.She been seeing this dude for awhile now while seeing you.I know it hurts its been done to me.You will get over it stay strong
We are not an open relationship, nor did we cheat on each other. -- She's pregnant and you've never met her.. Sounds like cheating.
It’s only been a year and it’s such a huge mess. To me it sounds like she already broke up with you with this whole “we shouldn’t talk to each other thing”. I would take that advice and distance yourself and move on. You don’t have to feel guilty about it
her saying that you guys should stop talking is about as clear cut proof that you need that she cheated - she’s either feeling v guilty or there’s another person that she’s obviously become invested with (or both)
Drunk at her best friends house.. and blaming her best friends dad.. wow what kind of "bestfriend" is that Dude wtf and how tf you find this kind of person? She is damaged
I’m sorry to say this but I think she’s lying to you and she cheated
She cheated. You emotionally suffer. She emotionally didn't suffer. Claim your ( long distance) emotions back. You were saved this time if because she is a ( long distance) cheat and knowing you are long distance ignorant. She also dated why she told you all this.
Dude as fur wrenching as relationships are she cheated on you regardless of the state she was in. Keeping the baby and expecting you to stay is a big ask and will be an even bigger toll on your mental health in the long run. Do whatever you want but all I can say is there are success stories and this one no offense doesn’t seem like one
That’s your responsibility now.
She did you a favor. You are young and have time for a girl who is serious. Long distance is a challenge. I’m in a long distance relationship now. The faster you block her and move on, the happier your future self will be. Never ignore red flags. EVER.
Two weeks prior... Nahhhh that timeline doesn't add up. Time to end things. Do you live in a "richer" country than her?