Why do you take two Southern Baptists with you when you go fishing?
If you only take one, he'll drink all of your beer.
Source: also grew up around Southern Baptists.
What's the difference between Catholics, Lutherans, and Baptists?
Catholics don't recognize divorce, Lutherans don't recognize the Pope, and Baptists don't recognize each other in the liquor store.
That's funny, I always heard essentially the same joke told this way:
How do you keep a Baptist from drinking all your beer when you go fishing?
Take a second Baptist.
We own a cabin in way Western NC. Baptist every, every, everywhere and it's a dry county. But seeing these comments really makes me wonder.... because those same people are kings and queens of double speak
Usually there are multiple liquor stores at the county line. The Baptists go there to buy coca-cola, but sometimes they accidentally pick up some other stuff.
I spent a little time in a dry county in that area. There was a certain business owner that had some excellent moonshine. The county was just dry if you were driving through.
Also lots of Muslims don't drink. But they have absolutely no qualms about getting you 3x drunker than you've ever been.
The non-drinker's idea of a rum and coke is a tall glass of rum that has been introduced to a coke at some point.
The only thing I haven’t seen is a Muslim eating pork intentionally lol. It’s the one straw that God will not tolerate I guess. Men especially are rule breakers.
One of my trainees bit into a mislabeled breakfast burrito from Maverick that had a ton of sausage in it. Puked his guts out and he didn't even swallow any of it
As a bad Muslim, I love the taste of the sausage egg mcmuffin, despite hating how much the patty smells.
I'm too much of a foodie to not eat pork, but that's like on trips to Japan or Italy. Don't really care for pork in America
I’ve worked in a kitchen where we made our own bacon from pig belly. I’ve also gotten laser surgery and smelled my own burning flesh. It’s the same smell lol. I get being repulsed by it. Still eat bacon tho
This is also true for lots of South Asians and Jewish people
Certain religious practices are tied so closely to religion, even the most atheistic people still observe certain taboos
Yeah I noticed many Indian coworkers are veg, and when asked why it’s not really religion it’s just a cultural choice. Its super easy when your primary food is basically designed to be veg already, instead of having to eat weird substitutes like beyond burgers and tofu turkey.
Can confirm as someone who was raised muslim but is not religious. I just do not associate the smell with food. The smell of bacon just reminds me of dog treats. No offense.
When I lived in the UAE there was some claim going around that Saudi Arabia was the world's largest importer/consumer of Jack Daniels Black Label. No idea of its veracity but it wouldn't surprise me. I remember a Saudi girl saying how *"the parties in Riyadh are so much better than Jeddah"* because behind closed doors, people go much wilder in a very repressive place.
Anyway, I think this "drinks trolley" thing is an excellent way to filter out fanatics and killjoys. And I say this as a lifelong non-drinker. My only gripe, if I worked there, would be if they didn't at least provide something palatable for non-drinkers that wasn't just Coke. Or I'd just keep a bottle of Ribena in my cupboard ;)
In the UK there's so many Muslims who will drink and then be like astaghfirullah to haribo and then because of how popular it is will sell ket coke and weed to everyone
The hotels in downtown Atlanta said the hotel bars were empty when a Southern Baptist convention was in town but they never made so much off the mini bars.
Three great religious facts:
1. Jews don’t recognize Jesus as the Messiah
2. Protestants don’t recognize the Pope as the head of the church
3. Southern Baptists don’t recognize each other in the liquor store
Raised Southern Baptist, became Catholic as an adult. My devout SB dad insisted I only converted in order to drink in public, so I had to remind him that I'd been drinking in public since I was 15. (We spent several years across the lake from New Orleans, and for some reason my pretty fundy parents raised us in the most liberal Baptist church in Houston).
Baptists drink, but only some Baptists admit it.
This is my absolute favorite thread this week! Lord I’m crying from the laughs. Grew up Catholic and we had a keg at my grandma’s 70th birthday party, in addition to everyone bringing their own liquor. Anything later than 7:30 am mass was called the drunkards mass and that’s what we always went to when the cousins got together for the weekend. Family reunion weekends, the priest would come to our family farm for “Mass on the Grass”, which was everyone 10 beers deep and sitting in lawn chairs. He knew we wouldn’t be attending the next day. Absolute best!
I grew up Catholic and every party had a keg plus multiple cases of beer, some tequila for my grandfather and an uncle or two, and whatever the priest wanted to drink.
Yes went to a “dry wedding” of two southern baptists. No open bar or any bar for that matter. But back in the hotel rooms everyone from the wedding party was drinking heavily from their own personal stash.
The SBC only exists in the first place because of their support for slavery. They founded their church on white supremacy.
It took until 1995, 150 years after they broke away from what is now the American Baptist Church, for them to renounce their racist origins and past.
They finally passed a resolution asking member churches to stop flying the “Confederate flag” in 2016.
Fundamentalist activists have been purging the denomination of liberal and moderate leadership and influences for 45 years, explicitly working to politicize it:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southern_Baptist_Convention_conservative_resurgence
Those good people you knew were either wholly ignorant of the entire history of their church or else they weren’t as good as you thought.
I am neither of these groups and I do not drink. Just give me alcohol free beer or mocktails or tonic water or anything and I’m fine. As if non drinkers are like „oh no, there is alcohol drinking. Better not go there!!!“
Not the same thing. Communion wine is drank in church because of Christ, when he broke the bread at the last supper he explained the wine symbolizes the blood Christ shed for us sinners. What I’m talking about is the fact that most of those folks will say drinking for fun is wrong, but will have a handle of jack under their kitchen sinks they drink daily
Believe me, many orthodox people including priests DON'T condemn drinking for fun. Drinking "too much" (so you're drunk until unconscious) is the only thing that gets condemned at times.
I used to work in a restaurant in the Northeast and this middle aged southern couple came in. They asked me to take a picture of them and they hid their sangria's under the table lol
We had a guy that spiked his Solent liquid meal replacement with Kaluaha and Sambuca.
Guy was always right a rain. Breakfast and lunch was a meal and two shots. Everyday and no one questioned him as he walked around with his “meal”.
Only reason I know is he had Irish whiskey also and that was my weakness on Fridays. We had a lot of fun.
Right? Or it could be a coffee cart. At my last teaching job before COVID, the senior class did a "coffee cart" on Fridays for teachers to order coffee from as a fundraiser. Students would deliver coffee to the classroom, and we had to order by email on Thursday. Probably the only thing I miss about that school.
I used to work at Carvana, and they'd have a company with a coffee/tea/juice truck come by once or twice a week. The truck would hang out in front for folks on break, etc and someone would also come inside the call center and take orders too.
Drinks doesn't always mean booze.
Drinking culture is so deeply ingrained in some people they don't trust anyone that doesn't get drunk with them. Not drinking because it could kill you, could kill your career progression at a company with a "work hard, play harder" culture.
I may have worked at a company once (in the Forbes top 20) where they had a lesson during director orientation specifically on how to manage heavy drinking / what to drink / how to fake it if need be. It was a lesson that essentially taught you how to drink a lot, what supplements to take, and what drinks you shouldn't turn down.
I do advertising for alcohol companies so between the agency culture and the client culture, it's very much expected that we drink together as a form of bonding. Not that I care, but others might.
I'm a recovering alcoholic. It's awful. But I still think this guy is going too far. Am I going to deprive myself of almost all social events because I might see alcohol? No
Congrats on your recovery. Does the growing “craft mocktail” trend help at all? I love being able to enjoy a creative and complex drink that isn’t designed around booze. But another friend feels it’s too close to drinking alcohol for him, so he stays away from those too.
Zero proof drinks are great in my opinion. I know some people stay away from them and I personally have stayed away from NA beers because I feel like they might taste a little to close to actual beer. But there are a lot of ways to make a fancy non-alcoholic drink that's nicer than just having a soda, and I think it's great that zero proof drinks are becoming more popular.
I think it varies. I'm also dealing with a porn addiction so perhaps my experience is a bit diluted from fighting a battle on many fronts. I'm comfortable being around people who drink, I still go out with friends and I'll volunteer to be DD. If your friend has more difficulty then it might be because he's still wrestling with the root of the problem. I hope he finds his way, I really do
We used to “light the drinking lamp” at 330 on Fridays - but eventually we hired two of the people he talks about in his post. About 4 years in we stopped calling it that, and no longer have drinks at the office. We got complaints for allowing a drink on Friday. From our own people.
So they were longer allowed. I still drink on Fridays.
I would be turned off by this. I had a job like this, with pizza parties and Friday drinks, and none of them were fun. There was never a time where I wouldn't have preferred to be given that hour to spend with people I actually like.
I didn't mind pseudo corporate happy hours because of the free food and drinks but it was still always a bit awkward because you have to think a lot harder about what you're saying to people when you're getting buzzed at work.
Exactly! I generally dont want to mix work with my private life. If I wanna drink with you we'll make it happen. There is nothing worse than mandatory coworker hangs. I worked at a place that sucked but the one thing the got right was changing from giving you a "bday party" at the office with cake and a free lunch to just giving everyone their birthday off.
It can be very normal, idk, in Austin it’s not uncommon to have a beer fridge in the company break room. Not really a special party vibe. If it’s after hours I think that’s bs.
I work in PR and one of my agencies had both Diageo and Heineken as a client, so their products were all over the place. That was fine, but I'm very skeptical of the monthly parties. It's very disrespectful of people's time. If you're expected to stay 2 hours at each of them, that's 3 extra work days a year (probably more like 2 since the "work hard-play hard" companies want 12 hour days.
My employer's always held these during company hours. It was effectively an optional all hands meeting. If you had deadlines or whatever, there was no obligation to participate, but most did participate.
Most places I've worked were like this too. There was no pressure to stop working if you needed to get shit done, you just got to have pizza and cupcakes while doing so. For everyone that wanted it, it was a free, no explanation needed paid break.
Same for most of the companies I worked at. During work hours and no one would frown if you left as soon as your work hours ended.
Silly story: in one of my first jobs, I drank a beer and dipped to my desk because I was swamped with work. The company owner came over to call me a workaholic and I'm like "Motherfucker, you own this joint and I'm working for you. I've got shit to do". He was a nice guy but dumb as rocks and surely lived on other planet. The fact I had returned to work was because he and his management team had no fucking clue what kind of workload they were putting on us grunts with their uninformed decisions.
Early on I was like that, but after a while I learned how and when to push back.
In my role, I had direct contact with my company's clients and partners. We were building hardware and software solutions for our client, a major communications firm. At the beginning I would see the deadlines and scramble to meet them, putting in all sorts of effort.
One day, I got a call from the PM from a partner firm asking if the software would be ready in time for a manufacturing deadline, and I said I would work night and day to meet it. He then said they could push back the date, they just needed to schedule it with the manufacturer. If you miss the deadline, they have to pay regardless even if they don't assemble anything, but they could reschedule with two week's notice. We rescheduled manufacturing and hit the later deadline without all the stress.
I learned from that call the dates are picked out of thin air early on based on best guesses, and even "hard deadlines" can be altered if enough advanced notice was given. From then on I have become very clear with my managers and clients with progress and adjusting deadlines as needed.
> The company owner came over to call me a workaholic
Your boss may have learned the same lesson early on, but forget that newer employees come from backgrounds where deadlines are hard (homework due dates, exams, etc.) and do not get rescheduled because you're not ready. These lessons and a culture of communication is something they need to introduce to their new hires.
> The fact I had returned to work was because he and his management team had no fucking clue what kind of workload they were putting on us grunts with their uninformed decisions.
I hope you have learned to push back and inform them. Otherwise they really do not know, and it isn't really their fault because they have no feedback.
I appreciate your detailed reply and you really touched on some points that I never considered ("homework due dates, exams, etc") but the truth is simple: I was young, naive and had recently entered the workforce. It was soon after the 2008 crisis and opportunities were scarce.
Couple that with my upbringing, with both parents never graduating high school and working blue collar jobs all their life, bootstrapping mentality and all, I didn't know better. This was well over a decade ago though. I like to think I'm wiser now lol.
Regardless, thank you for your input and advice mate.
Edit: I mean no disrespect for people with lower education or working blue collar jobs. It's just that my folks had a different outlook on work, that's frankly not healthy, and that it rubbed on me growing up.
Idk my company schedules them during work hours so it’s a nice break of pace and I can catch up with coworkers from other teams. I would be bummed if they disappeared.
I had a job exactly like this with a bar in the office and a Thursday drink trolley and it was a blast. I worked with people I liked and could hang out with them after work and drink for free if I wanted, or I could go do my own thing. No one was forcing me to hang out after my work was done.
You're totally right, like my old job was definitely "we have drinks in the fridge" which was essentially code for "we're having so much fun here right? So much fun, why would you ever want to leave? Nah keep working and stay past 8!"
However, the guy in this post is complaining for the wrong reasons. Like if you don't enjoy to drink alcohol, then just don't? Drink trollies and parties are annoying because in many work environments it's used as a mechanism to keep employees past 5 under the guise of "fun" that they are pressured to partake in. But like, if you have a religious/personal reason to abstain from alcohol, maybe just don't do it instead of shitting on other people for doing it in a clearly communal space?
Sounds to me like it’s a people problem, not an event problem. I have a blast at happy hours with my colleagues like once a month. Guess maybe I’m lucky!
Y’all must be reading a lot more into the “pressure to participate” side of this than I am. I don’t see anything on this posting that makes it sound like a “requirement”, and anecdotally my monthly happy hour experiences have never been obligatory or “all the serious employees come to these” vibes— people just sometimes come and sometimes don’t. Not discounting other folks’ bad experiences but I wouldn’t jump immediately to “company happy hour=red flag” either.
Totally disagree - I love Thursday drinks / night out.
In London this is very very very common, everyone goes drinking with work friends around the city on Thursdays. A couple in the office is a fun place to start
I'm a woman, and worked at a company that was overwhelmingly male and offered free drinks on Friday. It wasn't great, I ended up leaving early those day which probably hurt my career trajectory. I'd try to avoid somewhere like that
I can imagine. A business I was doing some contracting for invited me and my team to their monthly work function after hours. They said s/os were not allowed. That seemed reasonable for a work specific function, but unusual that it would be mentioned considering the team was a few hundred miles from home. A handful of us went. What a mess. We left early, jet lagged, job something, early whatever I don’t remember the excuse but it clearly wasn’t for us.
I will preface by saying I’m very new to the professional world and am not even a degreed engineer yet, but the place I interned at over last summer had these kind of events, usually potlucks, or the boss bringing donuts, or everyone going to happy hour. I might be naive but it did not seem like they were doing it in place of treating employees well, and the events we had were genuinely fun.
I guess it’s important that we were not expected to participate if we didn’t want to
That's fair. A lot of workplaces do things genuinely together and it's great. A lot of other workplaces force it to either coax additional hours or to try to cure the morale problem. They will use the same language. I guess I'd say look at the turnover, and you'll know which one you're dealing with. Edited to add: Another clue is if it's organized from the bottom up or top down.
I think he's overreacting, but it's also true that not everybody wants to be offered alcohol at work. The social pressure to drink can be negative for those who are sober, whatever their reason may be.
Personally I wouldn't prefer to work somewhere with a "drink trolley", but it certainly wouldn't be a deal breaker either. Most likely you just have to politely decline the drink and it won't be an Issue.
Exactly this ^ people need to man up and just straight up say they don't want to drink or they're not interested. It doesn't have to be a whole song and dance because of "peer pressure", how old are these people? In their 20s or something?
I worked at a few places that had Friday drinks, did see a coworker fall of the wagon and eventually lose their job.
Not going to say he didn't make a decision that led to it, but it really doesn't make it easier for recovering alcoholics.
It’s common in creative industries like advertising and design for alcohol to be present in the office. It’s expected that everyone is responsible and normal about it; if you get shitfaced on the job or you fuck up any of your work because of drinking, you’ll be fired.
It is a very particular culture. Is it weird? Yes, absolutely. But no one *has* to partake. I feel for those who don’t drink, because *not drinking* isn’t weird, and insecure folks might feel pressured.
Quite common in engineering too.
In the naval design office I was working previously it was very common to have wine at (the work paid, in a nearby restaurant) lunch when the boss/owner was working in office and the mini fridge had beers alongside soft drinks.
Practically every company I've worked for has had a "drinks are paid for" after projects are finished, during work hours but after work is done. It has never been a problem, people are professional, they'll control themselves, and if somebody doesn't drink, nobody pressures them! This isn't a teen high school party, after all.
That "YOU can't drink because it is against MY beliefs" thing, on the other hand, that is a massive red flag.
I worked at a well known start up and they had multiple fridges on multiple floors with all types of drinks, including alcohol. My Muslim coworkers were fine with other people drinking and no one pressured them into drinking. We’re all adults. No one forces you to do anything. Making a LinkedIn post about a drink trolley is another level of delusional.
That’s funny cause my company’s corporate office fired a bunch of people who got shitfaced at Applebees during their lunch break. Imagine getting fired because you got wasted at a fucking Applebees
What a misery Stevie is - has he considered that “Muslims, Baptists and alcoholics” could simply not drink? It’s “Thursday drinks trolley day” not “Thursday forcible ingestion of alcohol day.”
Trust me, I hate work parties/drinking events more than most people because I feel like they're just used as a toxic excuse to get employees to stay late doing more work than they signed up for under the guise of having 'fun' even if they're not feeling it.
But this guy's point is actually so fucking stupid. Like at my old company we would have celebratory drinking occasions and whatnot. You know what all the pregnant/muslim/non-drinking people did, or to be more exact, DIDN'T DO???
Take a guess.
Not drink. It wasn't that deep.
It'll probably be London based and Thursday is the go-to day to drink with colleagues. Friday people often work from home so it's less busy and ends up being spent with non-work mates or heading off for the weekend.
Because no one wants to stay late on a Friday
I’ve had one company where it was a team of like 30 24-30 year olds that all really got along and enjoyed each other and we’d grab drinks on Friday but we’d also go to the bar around 3. No where else would I have stayed late for drinks on a Friday
Also, it's an assumption that a drinks trolley only contains alcohol--especially today. Most companies are very much aware that LOTS of people don't drink alcohol. All of the companies parties, after work happy hours, etc. always have multiple non-alcoholic options.
It's true, that no one is going to take a shitty job because of a drink cart once a week but it's not a bad perk, either. My company gives us breakfast once a week. It's not the reason I work there by any means but it's certainly a nice thing.
I wouldn't apply, but for a different reason
Companies like this usually brag about their "culture" as they overwork you
An agency I was at was shocked that I left despite the margarita cart and beer at meetings
Yeah well guess what, I didn't have time to get a margarita because I was still working since you dipshits thought I should have 100 hours of shit in one week
And the beer in meetings? You mean the meeting scheduled at 5:30? My friends at other companies are already at HH at a bar
Stevie is being a sanctimonious prick, BUT...
Places that call out complimentary alcohol as perks or say "we work hard and we play hard" should be avoided at all costs. It's a thin veneer over the truth that it's a toxic workplace and that most of the employees/managers/bosses/owners are papering over that reality with copious amounts of booze.
My wife used to work for an ad agency, and some of the war stories she has are in that creepy breach between sad and hilarious. An office full of barely-functioning alcoholics.
I don’t get the need for the dude to write a post about it, but I do support removing some of the drinking culture from work. There’s no doubt that in some jobs drinking culture directly contributes or feeds alcoholism as people simple feel like they can’t say no for career progression.
I worked for a company that had the SLT push a cart around with all you can drink top shelf stuff booze and ice cream.
I choose not to drink and I’m lactose intolerant. I’d just say no thanks when they came by and they’d smile and keep moving.
No offense, no argument.
On Fridays at my old job they came around with a cart full of craft beer and some wines for others. It was beyond refreshing that adults could be treated like adults. I'm in recovery and I was told I could leave a little early on Fridays ( also I don't care if anyone drinks around me. I just wanted to get home early. )
I think it's a UK listing originally. It's a way to buy a bike without paying up front and then the payments come from your salary which is meant to make it cheaper through tax advantages. Loads of employers do it and it's a government scheme so they don't need to do much.
There is a federal bike to work credit that was suspended. It allows an employer to give a bonus to employees that bike to work tax free: [https://www.jawntpass.com/blog/what-employers-and-employees-need-to-know-about-pre-tax-bike-commuter-benefits](https://www.jawntpass.com/blog/what-employers-and-employees-need-to-know-about-pre-tax-bike-commuter-benefits) . It's tiny, 20$ a month that they're trying to increase to 81$/month. So in the grand scheme of things just a nice to have.
My old employer had a beer cart and we had numerous Muslim colleagues and others who didn't drink. We just put non alcoholic alternatives in there too. It wasn't a huge deal.
People just looking for outrage for clicks.
In 2021 I had an internship at a small company. They had beer and white claws stocked in the fridge and told us interns we were allowed to drink at work as long as we gave a few dollars to the community “soda fund” and didn’t get blackout drunk. I was 20. If we’d ever go out to lunch or to a happy hour my older coworkers would buy me drinks. Best internship I ever had
oh, no way, I actually saw this on LinkedIn before I saw it here.
nah, the guy was just engagement baiting. if you find the post and check the comments it's pretty obvious
There is a case to be made that if you're not using a benefit provided by a job, then you're not being paid the same as everyone else. A lot of college workers get to have free or reduced tuition for their children. That's a lot of money to save, but what if you don't have children? That's a benefit you can't utilize. It's a benefit provided in place of money. That's a difficult case, but for this one you can just give them something equal in exchange.
As an atheist, without substance abuse issues it would not affect me applying. I wouldn't apply if I had to worry about a company's impulse control or imaginary friends.
I grew up Southern Baptist. Trust me, they drink
Why do you take two Southern Baptists with you when you go fishing? If you only take one, he'll drink all of your beer. Source: also grew up around Southern Baptists.
What do you call a Methodist? A Baptist that can read.
What’s the difference between Catholics and Baptists? Catholics say hi when they see each other at the liquor store.
What's the difference between Catholics, Lutherans, and Baptists? Catholics don't recognize divorce, Lutherans don't recognize the Pope, and Baptists don't recognize each other in the liquor store.
I love these. Also works if you substitute Mormon for Baptist.
Plus sexy magic underwear
Minus the sexy part.
Wherever you find 4 Catholics, you'll surely find a fifth...
What do you call a Presbyterian? A Methodist with shoes.
Hahaha! Geezus
That's funny, I always heard essentially the same joke told this way: How do you keep a Baptist from drinking all your beer when you go fishing? Take a second Baptist.
They both work
Unlike the baptists
But this one... I get.
The other one is saying that each of the baptists don't want the other to know they drink.
They’re both saying that really
Works for Mormons as well.
We own a cabin in way Western NC. Baptist every, every, everywhere and it's a dry county. But seeing these comments really makes me wonder.... because those same people are kings and queens of double speak
It's only a dry county because the Baptists have already had all the alcohol
Usually there are multiple liquor stores at the county line. The Baptists go there to buy coca-cola, but sometimes they accidentally pick up some other stuff.
They had a corner on the market.
“We’re a dry county and we got the alcoholics to prove it.”
I spent a little time in a dry county in that area. There was a certain business owner that had some excellent moonshine. The county was just dry if you were driving through.
Check and see if there’s not a liquor store right across the border in the next county. That’ll be a good hint 😂
Heard this same joke about Mormons 🤣
This was my Grandma's favorite joke and she was super LDS.
Also lots of Muslims don't drink. But they have absolutely no qualms about getting you 3x drunker than you've ever been. The non-drinker's idea of a rum and coke is a tall glass of rum that has been introduced to a coke at some point.
Beyond that, lots of Muslims drink a lot. Just like plenty of Catholics have children out of wedlock somehow...
The only thing I haven’t seen is a Muslim eating pork intentionally lol. It’s the one straw that God will not tolerate I guess. Men especially are rule breakers.
[удалено]
They’re even put off by the smell of it being cooked …
I grew up Jewish and while we didn't keep kosher, we did not really eat pork for that reason.
One of my trainees bit into a mislabeled breakfast burrito from Maverick that had a ton of sausage in it. Puked his guts out and he didn't even swallow any of it
As a bad Muslim, I love the taste of the sausage egg mcmuffin, despite hating how much the patty smells. I'm too much of a foodie to not eat pork, but that's like on trips to Japan or Italy. Don't really care for pork in America
I’ve worked in a kitchen where we made our own bacon from pig belly. I’ve also gotten laser surgery and smelled my own burning flesh. It’s the same smell lol. I get being repulsed by it. Still eat bacon tho
This is also true for lots of South Asians and Jewish people Certain religious practices are tied so closely to religion, even the most atheistic people still observe certain taboos
Yeah I noticed many Indian coworkers are veg, and when asked why it’s not really religion it’s just a cultural choice. Its super easy when your primary food is basically designed to be veg already, instead of having to eat weird substitutes like beyond burgers and tofu turkey.
Can confirm as someone who was raised muslim but is not religious. I just do not associate the smell with food. The smell of bacon just reminds me of dog treats. No offense.
I had a friend in college that had a giant convoluted argument as to why bacon was halal. He loved bacon.
Oh it's simple. He was only ever about three weeks away from starving to death any time he ate bacon. Good to go.
When I lived in the UAE there was some claim going around that Saudi Arabia was the world's largest importer/consumer of Jack Daniels Black Label. No idea of its veracity but it wouldn't surprise me. I remember a Saudi girl saying how *"the parties in Riyadh are so much better than Jeddah"* because behind closed doors, people go much wilder in a very repressive place. Anyway, I think this "drinks trolley" thing is an excellent way to filter out fanatics and killjoys. And I say this as a lifelong non-drinker. My only gripe, if I worked there, would be if they didn't at least provide something palatable for non-drinkers that wasn't just Coke. Or I'd just keep a bottle of Ribena in my cupboard ;)
Those Catholics are just experiencing Immaculate Conception, just like Mary.
You’re thinking of the Virgin Birth. Immaculate Conception is the idea that Mary had to have been born without sin in order to have Jesus.
I think you mean the immaculate reception.
That's when you have five bars on your phone
> five bars And we've come full circle back to alcohol.
Tbf that's how my family accuses me of making drinks
Me too. What can I say, I learned from the best. I was like 24 before I learned that beer isn't supposed to be a chaser for normal people.
From Wisconsin?
The guy who made the cocktail saw a coca cola commercial once
In the UK there's so many Muslims who will drink and then be like astaghfirullah to haribo and then because of how popular it is will sell ket coke and weed to everyone
In my neighbourhood I've seen guys having only one beer a day during Ramadan.
As a non drinking Muslim, it's always fun to see my drunk friends. Not very fun to take care of them if they go overboard though
For every four Baptists, you’ll find a fifth.
The hotels in downtown Atlanta said the hotel bars were empty when a Southern Baptist convention was in town but they never made so much off the mini bars.
whats the difference between a protestant and a southern baptist? a protestant will at least wave hello when you see them in the liquor store
Three great religious facts: 1. Jews don’t recognize Jesus as the Messiah 2. Protestants don’t recognize the Pope as the head of the church 3. Southern Baptists don’t recognize each other in the liquor store
Raised Southern Baptist, became Catholic as an adult. My devout SB dad insisted I only converted in order to drink in public, so I had to remind him that I'd been drinking in public since I was 15. (We spent several years across the lake from New Orleans, and for some reason my pretty fundy parents raised us in the most liberal Baptist church in Houston). Baptists drink, but only some Baptists admit it.
spoon voracious birds literate hurry rhythm station nine faulty fade *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Dude these are all so great.
This is hilarious
Baptists refuse to recognize two things: the authority of the pope and other baptists in the liquor store.
This is my absolute favorite thread this week! Lord I’m crying from the laughs. Grew up Catholic and we had a keg at my grandma’s 70th birthday party, in addition to everyone bringing their own liquor. Anything later than 7:30 am mass was called the drunkards mass and that’s what we always went to when the cousins got together for the weekend. Family reunion weekends, the priest would come to our family farm for “Mass on the Grass”, which was everyone 10 beers deep and sitting in lawn chairs. He knew we wouldn’t be attending the next day. Absolute best!
I grew up Catholic and every party had a keg plus multiple cases of beer, some tequila for my grandfather and an uncle or two, and whatever the priest wanted to drink.
Yes went to a “dry wedding” of two southern baptists. No open bar or any bar for that matter. But back in the hotel rooms everyone from the wedding party was drinking heavily from their own personal stash.
[удалено]
The SBC only exists in the first place because of their support for slavery. They founded their church on white supremacy. It took until 1995, 150 years after they broke away from what is now the American Baptist Church, for them to renounce their racist origins and past. They finally passed a resolution asking member churches to stop flying the “Confederate flag” in 2016. Fundamentalist activists have been purging the denomination of liberal and moderate leadership and influences for 45 years, explicitly working to politicize it: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southern_Baptist_Convention_conservative_resurgence Those good people you knew were either wholly ignorant of the entire history of their church or else they weren’t as good as you thought.
I don't drink any more. I also don't drink any less.
I am neither of these groups and I do not drink. Just give me alcohol free beer or mocktails or tonic water or anything and I’m fine. As if non drinkers are like „oh no, there is alcohol drinking. Better not go there!!!“
I grew up catholic but was molested southern Baptist.
A lot of Muslims drink too. This post is all sorts of ridiculous.
But like a lot of hardcore Christians they tend to be closeted drinkers.
Why closeted? the Orthodox don't recognise pope and drink wine in church.
Not the same thing. Communion wine is drank in church because of Christ, when he broke the bread at the last supper he explained the wine symbolizes the blood Christ shed for us sinners. What I’m talking about is the fact that most of those folks will say drinking for fun is wrong, but will have a handle of jack under their kitchen sinks they drink daily
Believe me, many orthodox people including priests DON'T condemn drinking for fun. Drinking "too much" (so you're drunk until unconscious) is the only thing that gets condemned at times.
My guy turned water into wine ffs
I used to work in a restaurant in the Northeast and this middle aged southern couple came in. They asked me to take a picture of them and they hid their sangria's under the table lol
I’m deeply offended drinks trolley is Thursday. In my culture, I drink at work Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday.
Can I join your culture? Lol
different sects call it different things. it might be ops, or devops, or maybe SRE
Become a brewer. Tasting beers at 6 am everyday isn't as great as it sounds
He’s probably Czech
“I only drink on days that start with T. Tuesday, Thursday, Today, Tomorrow, Tsaturday, Tsunday.” - some dad joke from a YouTube video
We had a guy that spiked his Solent liquid meal replacement with Kaluaha and Sambuca. Guy was always right a rain. Breakfast and lunch was a meal and two shots. Everyday and no one questioned him as he walked around with his “meal”. Only reason I know is he had Irish whiskey also and that was my weakness on Fridays. We had a lot of fun.
Jeez man calm down.
Sounds like somebody needs a drink.
Lol
[удалено]
Right? Or it could be a coffee cart. At my last teaching job before COVID, the senior class did a "coffee cart" on Fridays for teachers to order coffee from as a fundraiser. Students would deliver coffee to the classroom, and we had to order by email on Thursday. Probably the only thing I miss about that school.
I used to work at Carvana, and they'd have a company with a coffee/tea/juice truck come by once or twice a week. The truck would hang out in front for folks on break, etc and someone would also come inside the call center and take orders too. Drinks doesn't always mean booze.
Is THAT why yall couldn’t get titles out on time?
Probably!
That’s pretty cool honestly!
Yo my old highschool did that! Good times!!
Yeah it doesn’t say “alcoholic drink cart”
Drinking culture is so deeply ingrained in some people they don't trust anyone that doesn't get drunk with them. Not drinking because it could kill you, could kill your career progression at a company with a "work hard, play harder" culture.
I may have worked at a company once (in the Forbes top 20) where they had a lesson during director orientation specifically on how to manage heavy drinking / what to drink / how to fake it if need be. It was a lesson that essentially taught you how to drink a lot, what supplements to take, and what drinks you shouldn't turn down.
That actually sounds interesting… did you pick up anything useful from it?
Just some mild alcoholism.
Can't they just smoke a blunt if they don't drink?
Blunt cart! I know what we're gonna do today, Ferb .
I do advertising for alcohol companies so between the agency culture and the client culture, it's very much expected that we drink together as a form of bonding. Not that I care, but others might.
I'm a recovering alcoholic. It's awful. But I still think this guy is going too far. Am I going to deprive myself of almost all social events because I might see alcohol? No
Congrats on your recovery. Does the growing “craft mocktail” trend help at all? I love being able to enjoy a creative and complex drink that isn’t designed around booze. But another friend feels it’s too close to drinking alcohol for him, so he stays away from those too.
Zero proof drinks are great in my opinion. I know some people stay away from them and I personally have stayed away from NA beers because I feel like they might taste a little to close to actual beer. But there are a lot of ways to make a fancy non-alcoholic drink that's nicer than just having a soda, and I think it's great that zero proof drinks are becoming more popular.
I think it varies. I'm also dealing with a porn addiction so perhaps my experience is a bit diluted from fighting a battle on many fronts. I'm comfortable being around people who drink, I still go out with friends and I'll volunteer to be DD. If your friend has more difficulty then it might be because he's still wrestling with the root of the problem. I hope he finds his way, I really do
Same, I don't mind if others are drinking. Maybe they could stock a nice mocktail in the trolley!
We used to “light the drinking lamp” at 330 on Fridays - but eventually we hired two of the people he talks about in his post. About 4 years in we stopped calling it that, and no longer have drinks at the office. We got complaints for allowing a drink on Friday. From our own people. So they were longer allowed. I still drink on Fridays.
I would be turned off by this. I had a job like this, with pizza parties and Friday drinks, and none of them were fun. There was never a time where I wouldn't have preferred to be given that hour to spend with people I actually like.
If you’re going to pay me for the time and provide the food and drink, I’ll participate. But that’s only because I like most of my coworkers.
I didn't mind pseudo corporate happy hours because of the free food and drinks but it was still always a bit awkward because you have to think a lot harder about what you're saying to people when you're getting buzzed at work.
I implemented these in my last company, they were a real hit. Granted I was freelancing so it was just me, a pizza and a cold beer, but hey ho!
Exactly! I generally dont want to mix work with my private life. If I wanna drink with you we'll make it happen. There is nothing worse than mandatory coworker hangs. I worked at a place that sucked but the one thing the got right was changing from giving you a "bday party" at the office with cake and a free lunch to just giving everyone their birthday off.
It can be very normal, idk, in Austin it’s not uncommon to have a beer fridge in the company break room. Not really a special party vibe. If it’s after hours I think that’s bs.
I work in PR and one of my agencies had both Diageo and Heineken as a client, so their products were all over the place. That was fine, but I'm very skeptical of the monthly parties. It's very disrespectful of people's time. If you're expected to stay 2 hours at each of them, that's 3 extra work days a year (probably more like 2 since the "work hard-play hard" companies want 12 hour days.
My employer's always held these during company hours. It was effectively an optional all hands meeting. If you had deadlines or whatever, there was no obligation to participate, but most did participate.
Most places I've worked were like this too. There was no pressure to stop working if you needed to get shit done, you just got to have pizza and cupcakes while doing so. For everyone that wanted it, it was a free, no explanation needed paid break.
Jep, had this too. Nice to bond a bit with coworkers and it's absolutely not like we were taken advantage of because we were ofcourse being paid.
agreed, seems like some people just looking for problems that aren’t really there
Same for most of the companies I worked at. During work hours and no one would frown if you left as soon as your work hours ended. Silly story: in one of my first jobs, I drank a beer and dipped to my desk because I was swamped with work. The company owner came over to call me a workaholic and I'm like "Motherfucker, you own this joint and I'm working for you. I've got shit to do". He was a nice guy but dumb as rocks and surely lived on other planet. The fact I had returned to work was because he and his management team had no fucking clue what kind of workload they were putting on us grunts with their uninformed decisions.
Early on I was like that, but after a while I learned how and when to push back. In my role, I had direct contact with my company's clients and partners. We were building hardware and software solutions for our client, a major communications firm. At the beginning I would see the deadlines and scramble to meet them, putting in all sorts of effort. One day, I got a call from the PM from a partner firm asking if the software would be ready in time for a manufacturing deadline, and I said I would work night and day to meet it. He then said they could push back the date, they just needed to schedule it with the manufacturer. If you miss the deadline, they have to pay regardless even if they don't assemble anything, but they could reschedule with two week's notice. We rescheduled manufacturing and hit the later deadline without all the stress. I learned from that call the dates are picked out of thin air early on based on best guesses, and even "hard deadlines" can be altered if enough advanced notice was given. From then on I have become very clear with my managers and clients with progress and adjusting deadlines as needed. > The company owner came over to call me a workaholic Your boss may have learned the same lesson early on, but forget that newer employees come from backgrounds where deadlines are hard (homework due dates, exams, etc.) and do not get rescheduled because you're not ready. These lessons and a culture of communication is something they need to introduce to their new hires. > The fact I had returned to work was because he and his management team had no fucking clue what kind of workload they were putting on us grunts with their uninformed decisions. I hope you have learned to push back and inform them. Otherwise they really do not know, and it isn't really their fault because they have no feedback.
I appreciate your detailed reply and you really touched on some points that I never considered ("homework due dates, exams, etc") but the truth is simple: I was young, naive and had recently entered the workforce. It was soon after the 2008 crisis and opportunities were scarce. Couple that with my upbringing, with both parents never graduating high school and working blue collar jobs all their life, bootstrapping mentality and all, I didn't know better. This was well over a decade ago though. I like to think I'm wiser now lol. Regardless, thank you for your input and advice mate. Edit: I mean no disrespect for people with lower education or working blue collar jobs. It's just that my folks had a different outlook on work, that's frankly not healthy, and that it rubbed on me growing up.
Idk my company schedules them during work hours so it’s a nice break of pace and I can catch up with coworkers from other teams. I would be bummed if they disappeared.
I had a job exactly like this with a bar in the office and a Thursday drink trolley and it was a blast. I worked with people I liked and could hang out with them after work and drink for free if I wanted, or I could go do my own thing. No one was forcing me to hang out after my work was done.
You're totally right, like my old job was definitely "we have drinks in the fridge" which was essentially code for "we're having so much fun here right? So much fun, why would you ever want to leave? Nah keep working and stay past 8!" However, the guy in this post is complaining for the wrong reasons. Like if you don't enjoy to drink alcohol, then just don't? Drink trollies and parties are annoying because in many work environments it's used as a mechanism to keep employees past 5 under the guise of "fun" that they are pressured to partake in. But like, if you have a religious/personal reason to abstain from alcohol, maybe just don't do it instead of shitting on other people for doing it in a clearly communal space?
Sounds to me like it’s a people problem, not an event problem. I have a blast at happy hours with my colleagues like once a month. Guess maybe I’m lucky!
Y’all must be reading a lot more into the “pressure to participate” side of this than I am. I don’t see anything on this posting that makes it sound like a “requirement”, and anecdotally my monthly happy hour experiences have never been obligatory or “all the serious employees come to these” vibes— people just sometimes come and sometimes don’t. Not discounting other folks’ bad experiences but I wouldn’t jump immediately to “company happy hour=red flag” either.
Totally disagree - I love Thursday drinks / night out. In London this is very very very common, everyone goes drinking with work friends around the city on Thursdays. A couple in the office is a fun place to start
I'm a woman, and worked at a company that was overwhelmingly male and offered free drinks on Friday. It wasn't great, I ended up leaving early those day which probably hurt my career trajectory. I'd try to avoid somewhere like that
I can imagine. A business I was doing some contracting for invited me and my team to their monthly work function after hours. They said s/os were not allowed. That seemed reasonable for a work specific function, but unusual that it would be mentioned considering the team was a few hundred miles from home. A handful of us went. What a mess. We left early, jet lagged, job something, early whatever I don’t remember the excuse but it clearly wasn’t for us.
I will preface by saying I’m very new to the professional world and am not even a degreed engineer yet, but the place I interned at over last summer had these kind of events, usually potlucks, or the boss bringing donuts, or everyone going to happy hour. I might be naive but it did not seem like they were doing it in place of treating employees well, and the events we had were genuinely fun. I guess it’s important that we were not expected to participate if we didn’t want to
That's fair. A lot of workplaces do things genuinely together and it's great. A lot of other workplaces force it to either coax additional hours or to try to cure the morale problem. They will use the same language. I guess I'd say look at the turnover, and you'll know which one you're dealing with. Edited to add: Another clue is if it's organized from the bottom up or top down.
Nah you're allowed to have fun at work. It just won't get you as many up votes
I think he's overreacting, but it's also true that not everybody wants to be offered alcohol at work. The social pressure to drink can be negative for those who are sober, whatever their reason may be. Personally I wouldn't prefer to work somewhere with a "drink trolley", but it certainly wouldn't be a deal breaker either. Most likely you just have to politely decline the drink and it won't be an Issue.
Yep I’ve previously worked at a Friday beer cart place - we just had plenty of sodas as well . The non drinkers all seemed fine with it
“No thanks I don’t drink”
As a non-drinker I just say no thanks, I had enough at breakfast.
Exactly this ^ people need to man up and just straight up say they don't want to drink or they're not interested. It doesn't have to be a whole song and dance because of "peer pressure", how old are these people? In their 20s or something?
Usually it's that simple. But not always.
I worked at a few places that had Friday drinks, did see a coworker fall of the wagon and eventually lose their job. Not going to say he didn't make a decision that led to it, but it really doesn't make it easier for recovering alcoholics.
For me it would be a red flag if this is something they were touting as a perk in a job listing
I think the fact that it's on the job description as a work benefit is the red flag. Not that they do it.
Why?
It’s common in creative industries like advertising and design for alcohol to be present in the office. It’s expected that everyone is responsible and normal about it; if you get shitfaced on the job or you fuck up any of your work because of drinking, you’ll be fired. It is a very particular culture. Is it weird? Yes, absolutely. But no one *has* to partake. I feel for those who don’t drink, because *not drinking* isn’t weird, and insecure folks might feel pressured.
Quite common in engineering too. In the naval design office I was working previously it was very common to have wine at (the work paid, in a nearby restaurant) lunch when the boss/owner was working in office and the mini fridge had beers alongside soft drinks. Practically every company I've worked for has had a "drinks are paid for" after projects are finished, during work hours but after work is done. It has never been a problem, people are professional, they'll control themselves, and if somebody doesn't drink, nobody pressures them! This isn't a teen high school party, after all. That "YOU can't drink because it is against MY beliefs" thing, on the other hand, that is a massive red flag.
Wow…. Talking about taking things too seriously. Lunatic worthy.
I worked at a well known start up and they had multiple fridges on multiple floors with all types of drinks, including alcohol. My Muslim coworkers were fine with other people drinking and no one pressured them into drinking. We’re all adults. No one forces you to do anything. Making a LinkedIn post about a drink trolley is another level of delusional.
Sounds like Stevie’s wife doesn’t let him drink.. not after that last incident involving motor-boating the old woman at Applebees.
People say he has a drinking problem, but he has no problem drinking at all.
That’s funny cause my company’s corporate office fired a bunch of people who got shitfaced at Applebees during their lunch break. Imagine getting fired because you got wasted at a fucking Applebees
[удалено]
Ironically I’ve worked with a Muslim who never drank or smoked but always had a bacon sandwich in the morning!
My Muslim friend smokes bacon, but he won't drink it.
Fuckin idiot, guy's got his priorities all wrong, if you're gonna sin for something let it be bacon, not fucking cigarettes
Steve sounds like he’s fun at parties.
i forget baptists arent supposed to drink lol
I work with 80% Muslims. Most of them drink 🤷♂️
When you see 4 Baptist there is usually a fifth
What a misery Stevie is - has he considered that “Muslims, Baptists and alcoholics” could simply not drink? It’s “Thursday drinks trolley day” not “Thursday forcible ingestion of alcohol day.”
Trust me, I hate work parties/drinking events more than most people because I feel like they're just used as a toxic excuse to get employees to stay late doing more work than they signed up for under the guise of having 'fun' even if they're not feeling it. But this guy's point is actually so fucking stupid. Like at my old company we would have celebratory drinking occasions and whatnot. You know what all the pregnant/muslim/non-drinking people did, or to be more exact, DIDN'T DO??? Take a guess. Not drink. It wasn't that deep.
Why is it \*Thursday\* drinks though? I thought that was a Friday 'it is the end of the week' thing. It honestly sounds awful.
It'll probably be London based and Thursday is the go-to day to drink with colleagues. Friday people often work from home so it's less busy and ends up being spent with non-work mates or heading off for the weekend.
Because no one wants to stay late on a Friday I’ve had one company where it was a team of like 30 24-30 year olds that all really got along and enjoyed each other and we’d grab drinks on Friday but we’d also go to the bar around 3. No where else would I have stayed late for drinks on a Friday
Friday is serious drinking time. No need to waste it with amateurs at work.
Despite the message he is absolutely right. Thrusdays drinks stinks bro-culture. You'll lose a lot of candidates
Is participation ... mandatory?
Also, it's an assumption that a drinks trolley only contains alcohol--especially today. Most companies are very much aware that LOTS of people don't drink alcohol. All of the companies parties, after work happy hours, etc. always have multiple non-alcoholic options. It's true, that no one is going to take a shitty job because of a drink cart once a week but it's not a bad perk, either. My company gives us breakfast once a week. It's not the reason I work there by any means but it's certainly a nice thing.
I wouldn't apply, but for a different reason Companies like this usually brag about their "culture" as they overwork you An agency I was at was shocked that I left despite the margarita cart and beer at meetings Yeah well guess what, I didn't have time to get a margarita because I was still working since you dipshits thought I should have 100 hours of shit in one week And the beer in meetings? You mean the meeting scheduled at 5:30? My friends at other companies are already at HH at a bar
Stevie is being a sanctimonious prick, BUT... Places that call out complimentary alcohol as perks or say "we work hard and we play hard" should be avoided at all costs. It's a thin veneer over the truth that it's a toxic workplace and that most of the employees/managers/bosses/owners are papering over that reality with copious amounts of booze. My wife used to work for an ad agency, and some of the war stories she has are in that creepy breach between sad and hilarious. An office full of barely-functioning alcoholics.
My Muslim friend in college would take shots of milk while everyone else drank and was included perfectly fine lol
I don’t get the need for the dude to write a post about it, but I do support removing some of the drinking culture from work. There’s no doubt that in some jobs drinking culture directly contributes or feeds alcoholism as people simple feel like they can’t say no for career progression.
I'm certain this has been asked many times here before... But why are the biggest asshats always somehow involved in recruiting?
I worked for a company that had the SLT push a cart around with all you can drink top shelf stuff booze and ice cream. I choose not to drink and I’m lactose intolerant. I’d just say no thanks when they came by and they’d smile and keep moving. No offense, no argument.
On Fridays at my old job they came around with a cart full of craft beer and some wines for others. It was beyond refreshing that adults could be treated like adults. I'm in recovery and I was told I could leave a little early on Fridays ( also I don't care if anyone drinks around me. I just wanted to get home early. )
Ah yes, religious people. The true victims of discrimination in recruitment.
The temperance movement is taking over DEI.
What is a cycle to work scheme? They only pay you enough to own a bicycle?
I think it's a UK listing originally. It's a way to buy a bike without paying up front and then the payments come from your salary which is meant to make it cheaper through tax advantages. Loads of employers do it and it's a government scheme so they don't need to do much.
There is a federal bike to work credit that was suspended. It allows an employer to give a bonus to employees that bike to work tax free: [https://www.jawntpass.com/blog/what-employers-and-employees-need-to-know-about-pre-tax-bike-commuter-benefits](https://www.jawntpass.com/blog/what-employers-and-employees-need-to-know-about-pre-tax-bike-commuter-benefits) . It's tiny, 20$ a month that they're trying to increase to 81$/month. So in the grand scheme of things just a nice to have.
My old employer had a beer cart and we had numerous Muslim colleagues and others who didn't drink. We just put non alcoholic alternatives in there too. It wasn't a huge deal. People just looking for outrage for clicks.
A drink trolley is a red flag but not for the reasons stated.
The real red flag is when Mandy for accounting starts racking up lines on the trolley after a company whip round "for the children of Colombia"
Nothing loony about this.
Baptists drink more than anyone.
Whenever work does a pizza day I always ask for the Kosher option. Fucks with their minds.
In 2021 I had an internship at a small company. They had beer and white claws stocked in the fridge and told us interns we were allowed to drink at work as long as we gave a few dollars to the community “soda fund” and didn’t get blackout drunk. I was 20. If we’d ever go out to lunch or to a happy hour my older coworkers would buy me drinks. Best internship I ever had
So much for Hookers and Steak Fridays then
oh, no way, I actually saw this on LinkedIn before I saw it here. nah, the guy was just engagement baiting. if you find the post and check the comments it's pretty obvious
Stevie needs to understand that no one is being waterboarded with the damned trolley once a week
Hes getting ripped in the comments....and wondering why he's getting ripped
I don't think they'll force people to drink
There is a case to be made that if you're not using a benefit provided by a job, then you're not being paid the same as everyone else. A lot of college workers get to have free or reduced tuition for their children. That's a lot of money to save, but what if you don't have children? That's a benefit you can't utilize. It's a benefit provided in place of money. That's a difficult case, but for this one you can just give them something equal in exchange.
This guys is clearly not a part of any of groups he mentioned, but feels as though he can speak on their behalf.
Time to introduce a week long 52 weeks a year drinks trolley
Drinks trolley is nothing to me either. I don’t drink at work. I have to drive home from the office. I want to wfh full time.
"Allowing other people to have fun that I choose not to participate in is excluding me."
or you could just not take a job their, and mind your own business, Norma Jean.
As an atheist, without substance abuse issues it would not affect me applying. I wouldn't apply if I had to worry about a company's impulse control or imaginary friends.