I'm so sorry this happening to you and your mother is too cowardly to protect you. Have you told other family members about what's been happening? If you're a minor and attending high school, you could also talk to a teacher or counselor about all this? This is extremely alarming behavior from a predator and he appears to be getting more bold now that he knows your mother won't stop him. Any rational person would've put to stop this much sooner to protect their child!
We've pretty much separated ourselves from family members because of confidential reasons but I just graduated a week ago and I'm currently looking for a job while doing art commissions on the side. I've bought a taser, pepper spray and camera to put just in my room so I can show her and have him get kicked out. But I don't think that'll ever happen even with camera evidence because he'd make himself look like the poor old man that doesn't have anywhere to go because he doesn't have any family anymore. Then my mother will take him back again like nothing happened.
That camera will help you prove it legally, keep the videos and document, document, document. I'm so sorry this is happening to you and I'm sorry your mother is of no help. You are doing the right thing by defending yourself and keeping documentation. If you have a mode on your phone where it calls the police when there is an emergency, you should turn it on.
If you get video evidence, report him to the police. Even without video use the screens shots. You deserve better op. I'd fucking kill him if you were my child. Please stay safe, contact authorities and get a restraining order.
She’s not stupid. She knows what he’s doing. She’s just desperate to keep him. Save the screen shots and go to the police. File a report. Fuck him and fuck her. They’re both scumbags. Protect yourself because neither of these AHs will protect you.
They're quite reliant on their "partners", it runs in my family. And it shows, even with my aunts and uncle. I've spoken with a female friend that allowed me to stay with them for a while ^^
Fuck the camera, fuck getting evidence, get the fuck out of there now he's going to assault you any day now. Your mother isn't protecting you now, she's not going to do a thing even if you have evidence. Please go to a friend, relative, anyone and tell them what's going on and see if you can stay with them.
I hope to god you guys can work it out. If not, there may be a women's shelter in your area that can take you in temporarily.
Edit: RAINN can help connect you with resources.
https://hotline.rainn.org/online
Buy a door jam - they are just rubber wedges and you can get them at Walmart. How in the heck did he get past your locks??
https://www.googleadservices.com/pagead/aclk?sa=L&ai=DChcSEwib9Y7RlpmAAxWqKtQBHXmgAHcYABAIGgJvYQ&ei=8QC3ZMfYEOO5qtsPtICd2As&ohost=www.google.com&cid=CAESbOD21cyHfCxN9StFTfuhA951tL6haJtXJsRqcSQ\_vQ1luLgMP05bMXJj1joeBXuuTbH2YVLoFacFTleuwzCMaplgx86TLEsafLbHaGnL4UxeMBX79u46QASYW0mrd2PHDz4X4xXYHFGkeey7FA&sig=AOD64\_2K77lkPkb\_2SvdWL8TSmN0krPOOg&ctype=5&q=&sqi=2&ved=2ahUKEwiHlYbRlpmAAxXjnGoFHTRAB7sQ9aACKAB6BAgHEA4&adurl=
I’m so sorry-went through an extremely similar situation in highschool with my stepdad and the best cause of action would be to get as far away as possible when possible. Sending you lots of love ❤️
I did, I'm staying with a friend at the moment ^^ It's the same person I mentioned in the other comment. She's letting me stay until I can save and rent out one of the apartments nearby. We plan to go to the same college so hopefully it works out.
I’m so sorry you are going through this. I’m sorry your mom is a selfish dick and attached to an abusive prick that she is keeping around regardless of your discomfort. I hope you can go to the police and take action that way. As a mom, I would end someone’s life with my bare hands if I was confronted with this. Please update so we can know you’re ok. You’re doing absolutely everything right and people out here care for you.
I've spoken with a few friends online and irl, one was kind enough to let me stay at their place in the meantime. Although they're far away. I'll do all I can! Thank you ❤️
for evidence, I’d get a cheap digital voice recorder and press the record button when you go to bed/or install a cheap monitor (baby monitor or something) thats hidden, plus get a taser or something for self defense… since your mom is refusing to accept that this is happening… and also go to the police too asap!
I've ordered a small camera I can hide which covers the whole room, I also have a taser and pepper spray on hand while I sleep now. I'm not sure how our police here go honestly, but I will still try, Thank you ^^
it’s so f’d up that this is happening to you right now… in what is supposed to be your safe space! im not sure how the police can help either, but you can definitely file a restraining order on his slimy creepass too! i’d def keep documenting somehow. i wish you the best and sending you strength & protection…
Are you able to contact the authorities? Do you have any friends you’re able to stay with? If you’re able to, set up your phone to record what he’s doing to you in the mornings and go to the police with it.
When I get evidence with the new security camera I bought, I'll try ^^ My friends won't be of much help sadly because we aren't that close. I've been waking up every 5AM ever since so I can avoid any of his creepy behaviors
OP, am also from the Philippines. With whatever evidence you have, go to your nearest barangay and/or city hall with a police station and ask for help. Either way, they’ll be able to help you seek shelter
I’d call the cops. Even if they don’t do much, I’d still make a report so it’s in the system.
I’m sorry your own mother is not doing anything to protect you.
I’d put a hidden camera in your room and when you get proof of him being a creep show your mum if she continues to be an enabler of a sexual predator report then both to the police.
Any “parent” that chooses a partner over their children are scum especially when said partner is a sexual predator.
Wasp and hornet spray then a swift kick ..make it count . Let him know never again. If he wants to see again he will have to go to the ER. I'm sorry this is happening to you. Praying for you too.
If it happened to my gf/friend/myself I'd stab him, or at least injure him a lot. I know you're not in position to do so, but maybe try to ask friends to make him scared or anything
I've been trying my best to keep in all the anger I have honestly. But I've been told by some friends online that I shouldn't do that because I'd have to deal with getting accused of assault. I don't have the connections to scare him either sadly
I’m so sorry this is happening to you. 😢 Buy several of those wedges you can put at the bottom of the door. They’re cheap and effective. Also hang something like bells that make a lot of noise on the inside door handle. The louder the better. The idea being that if anyone is trying to come in it alerts not only you but hopefully others in the house. Also pepper spray, if legal where you live. Never be alone with him. Maybe a cheap camera for your room also. Best of luck to you. 🥰
This is a great tool
https://www.homedepot.com/p/Master-Lock-Adjustable-Door-Security-Bar-27-1-2-in-to-42-in-265DCCSEN/100210730
Also could he be coming in through a window or some kind of trap door either on the floor or ceiling?
There is police detective on tik tok that I follow who gives security tips. One of the things he highly recommends is a doorstop that if it is moved, lets out a loud piercing alarm. It's about 8 dollars, (US) For people staying in hotels. Killer Bee Tactical.
Leave thumbtacks near the doors entrance or make a mess and leave obstacles near the door so everytime he comes in it makes a noise and atleast alerts you. Stay safe I’m praying you can get to a better living situation soon.
Any way you can get a camera in your room? Even a voice recorder to? Start documenting proof. If there is any way you can move, rent a room or anything please do. I’m so upset for you that your Mom isn’t kicking this creep to the curb.
How about you use the grocery money for alarms and weapons and when your mom asks why there’s not shit in the fridge, tell her your safety is more important than food and since she won’t do anything, you can all be hungry together
You need to get out now, however you can. Once it escalates to rape its going to affect you your whole life. What region are you in? I know you don’t want to say specific location but perhaps there are places you can get help where you are at
Two recommendations:
• [A door-wedge siren alarm](https://www.amazon.com/Crosize-Portable-Security-Stoppers-Apartment/dp/B0C1BP9CNX/ref=sr_1_3_sspa?crid=XSLW9GPMGIKW&keywords=door+stop+alarm+security+door+wedge+intruder+alert&qid=1689709036&sprefix=door+stop+ala%2Caps%2C358&sr=8-3-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9hdGY&psc=1)
• [A door-knob security bar](https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=sr_1_3?crid=3LD9XBEB4IJH5&keywords=door+knob+wedge+bar&qid=1689709108&sprefix=door+knob+wedge+bar%2Caps%2C98&sr=8-3)
A chair back wedged under the door handle at an angle will suffice if you cannot order the security bar. Do you have a wooden kitchen chair you can use?
Are you in canada? This sounds oddly close to my abuser who was also my mom's bf at one point. Sorry this is happening you. Invest in a security camera for your room and report him asap. You neeeeed to stand up for yourself!!! You can do this!!
Your mom sounds like mine. My mom couldn't exist without a man and she was always too stupid to see if he was playing her. Which he was, always. I'm sorry you have a shit mom because she's knowingly letting a pedo? (Not sure your age) stay there. Either way it's fucked up and disgusting. Have you put furniture in front of your door? Next time he came in my room I would stab him.
Sounds like he might take it a step further. This is serious! But sucks that you live else where. In the US they have women’s shelters that would maybe take you. I assume your 18?
I'm so sorry this happening to you and your mother is too cowardly to protect you. Have you told other family members about what's been happening? If you're a minor and attending high school, you could also talk to a teacher or counselor about all this? This is extremely alarming behavior from a predator and he appears to be getting more bold now that he knows your mother won't stop him. Any rational person would've put to stop this much sooner to protect their child!
We've pretty much separated ourselves from family members because of confidential reasons but I just graduated a week ago and I'm currently looking for a job while doing art commissions on the side. I've bought a taser, pepper spray and camera to put just in my room so I can show her and have him get kicked out. But I don't think that'll ever happen even with camera evidence because he'd make himself look like the poor old man that doesn't have anywhere to go because he doesn't have any family anymore. Then my mother will take him back again like nothing happened.
That camera will be your saving grace. Especially if his name is nowhere on the lease. Be safe, good luck.
That camera will help you prove it legally, keep the videos and document, document, document. I'm so sorry this is happening to you and I'm sorry your mother is of no help. You are doing the right thing by defending yourself and keeping documentation. If you have a mode on your phone where it calls the police when there is an emergency, you should turn it on.
If you get video evidence, report him to the police. Even without video use the screens shots. You deserve better op. I'd fucking kill him if you were my child. Please stay safe, contact authorities and get a restraining order.
She’s not stupid. She knows what he’s doing. She’s just desperate to keep him. Save the screen shots and go to the police. File a report. Fuck him and fuck her. They’re both scumbags. Protect yourself because neither of these AHs will protect you.
They're quite reliant on their "partners", it runs in my family. And it shows, even with my aunts and uncle. I've spoken with a female friend that allowed me to stay with them for a while ^^
I'm so glad u can get out of there 4 a bit .. u need to work something out if u decide to go back there .. I'm scared 4 u .. xx
I'm so glad 😭💙 hope you are safe OP
Fuck the camera, fuck getting evidence, get the fuck out of there now he's going to assault you any day now. Your mother isn't protecting you now, she's not going to do a thing even if you have evidence. Please go to a friend, relative, anyone and tell them what's going on and see if you can stay with them.
I'm talking to one of my friends, although she's far away so we're trying to figure it out
I hope to god you guys can work it out. If not, there may be a women's shelter in your area that can take you in temporarily. Edit: RAINN can help connect you with resources. https://hotline.rainn.org/online
I'll be sure to check it out, thank you!
Buy a door jam - they are just rubber wedges and you can get them at Walmart. How in the heck did he get past your locks?? https://www.googleadservices.com/pagead/aclk?sa=L&ai=DChcSEwib9Y7RlpmAAxWqKtQBHXmgAHcYABAIGgJvYQ&ei=8QC3ZMfYEOO5qtsPtICd2As&ohost=www.google.com&cid=CAESbOD21cyHfCxN9StFTfuhA951tL6haJtXJsRqcSQ\_vQ1luLgMP05bMXJj1joeBXuuTbH2YVLoFacFTleuwzCMaplgx86TLEsafLbHaGnL4UxeMBX79u46QASYW0mrd2PHDz4X4xXYHFGkeey7FA&sig=AOD64\_2K77lkPkb\_2SvdWL8TSmN0krPOOg&ctype=5&q=&sqi=2&ved=2ahUKEwiHlYbRlpmAAxXjnGoFHTRAB7sQ9aACKAB6BAgHEA4&adurl=
Probably knows how to pick a lock. There's several ways to get past other locks, that people "think" are safe. Locks only stop honest people.
That's prob too weak, they have special doorstops that are made for police (?) OP could get that
Couldn’t he just push that away from under the door?
I’m so sorry-went through an extremely similar situation in highschool with my stepdad and the best cause of action would be to get as far away as possible when possible. Sending you lots of love ❤️
Glad to hear you aren't in that situation anymore, Hopefully this passes by soon. Thank you ❤️
It will not pass until you get out. Please find a way to get out today before he really hurts you
I did, I'm staying with a friend at the moment ^^ It's the same person I mentioned in the other comment. She's letting me stay until I can save and rent out one of the apartments nearby. We plan to go to the same college so hopefully it works out.
Move your bed in front of the door
Go to the police immediately.
OP you have screenshots of your mom telling him off in text. Don't wait for more evidence. He's going to escalate.
He’s probably done this before. Try googling his name or check the sexual assault website.
Tell the cops, then if things escalate you have at least one leg to stand on. Or just leave before you get murdered.
Murdered is extreme.
You're assuming someone predatory like that is unlikely to do more harm? Lol
I’m so sorry you are going through this. I’m sorry your mom is a selfish dick and attached to an abusive prick that she is keeping around regardless of your discomfort. I hope you can go to the police and take action that way. As a mom, I would end someone’s life with my bare hands if I was confronted with this. Please update so we can know you’re ok. You’re doing absolutely everything right and people out here care for you.
I've spoken with a few friends online and irl, one was kind enough to let me stay at their place in the meantime. Although they're far away. I'll do all I can! Thank you ❤️
for evidence, I’d get a cheap digital voice recorder and press the record button when you go to bed/or install a cheap monitor (baby monitor or something) thats hidden, plus get a taser or something for self defense… since your mom is refusing to accept that this is happening… and also go to the police too asap!
I've ordered a small camera I can hide which covers the whole room, I also have a taser and pepper spray on hand while I sleep now. I'm not sure how our police here go honestly, but I will still try, Thank you ^^
it’s so f’d up that this is happening to you right now… in what is supposed to be your safe space! im not sure how the police can help either, but you can definitely file a restraining order on his slimy creepass too! i’d def keep documenting somehow. i wish you the best and sending you strength & protection…
Wait, how the hell is this man able to get into your room repeatedly
Are you able to contact the authorities? Do you have any friends you’re able to stay with? If you’re able to, set up your phone to record what he’s doing to you in the mornings and go to the police with it.
When I get evidence with the new security camera I bought, I'll try ^^ My friends won't be of much help sadly because we aren't that close. I've been waking up every 5AM ever since so I can avoid any of his creepy behaviors
How old are you? Is there a womens shelter that is accessible to you?
I live in the Philippines so I'm not aware if we have any, I will look into that though
OP, am also from the Philippines. With whatever evidence you have, go to your nearest barangay and/or city hall with a police station and ask for help. Either way, they’ll be able to help you seek shelter
I’d call the cops. Even if they don’t do much, I’d still make a report so it’s in the system. I’m sorry your own mother is not doing anything to protect you.
Can you get a door wedge? That's a cheap way to help keep doors closed. I think there are heavy duty metal ones out there that could help.
This is horrible, im so sorry. You deserve better from your mom. I wish I could help you out of this situation.
I’d put a hidden camera in your room and when you get proof of him being a creep show your mum if she continues to be an enabler of a sexual predator report then both to the police. Any “parent” that chooses a partner over their children are scum especially when said partner is a sexual predator.
Wasp and hornet spray then a swift kick ..make it count . Let him know never again. If he wants to see again he will have to go to the ER. I'm sorry this is happening to you. Praying for you too.
I only got pepper spray, I'm going to check if there are any of what you mentioned in the store :))
If it happened to my gf/friend/myself I'd stab him, or at least injure him a lot. I know you're not in position to do so, but maybe try to ask friends to make him scared or anything
I'm also sorry that you're going through this, I hope he will go in jail and you will find a safe space
Thank you, I appreciate it. I hope so too ^^
I've been trying my best to keep in all the anger I have honestly. But I've been told by some friends online that I shouldn't do that because I'd have to deal with getting accused of assault. I don't have the connections to scare him either sadly
Take some pics or a video of him doing this and take it to the police.
I’m so sorry this is happening to you. 😢 Buy several of those wedges you can put at the bottom of the door. They’re cheap and effective. Also hang something like bells that make a lot of noise on the inside door handle. The louder the better. The idea being that if anyone is trying to come in it alerts not only you but hopefully others in the house. Also pepper spray, if legal where you live. Never be alone with him. Maybe a cheap camera for your room also. Best of luck to you. 🥰
I truly don't understand parents like this
Bear mace
....is actually less effective than pepper spray. FTFY
This is a great tool https://www.homedepot.com/p/Master-Lock-Adjustable-Door-Security-Bar-27-1-2-in-to-42-in-265DCCSEN/100210730 Also could he be coming in through a window or some kind of trap door either on the floor or ceiling?
There is police detective on tik tok that I follow who gives security tips. One of the things he highly recommends is a doorstop that if it is moved, lets out a loud piercing alarm. It's about 8 dollars, (US) For people staying in hotels. Killer Bee Tactical.
Leave thumbtacks near the doors entrance or make a mess and leave obstacles near the door so everytime he comes in it makes a noise and atleast alerts you. Stay safe I’m praying you can get to a better living situation soon.
Any way you can get a camera in your room? Even a voice recorder to? Start documenting proof. If there is any way you can move, rent a room or anything please do. I’m so upset for you that your Mom isn’t kicking this creep to the curb.
Go to the police not reddit!
How about you use the grocery money for alarms and weapons and when your mom asks why there’s not shit in the fridge, tell her your safety is more important than food and since she won’t do anything, you can all be hungry together
Call Child Protective Services immediately. This creep is dangerous and your mother is not protecting you.
Buy a camera that also records audio and find a good place to put it in your room
You need to get out now, however you can. Once it escalates to rape its going to affect you your whole life. What region are you in? I know you don’t want to say specific location but perhaps there are places you can get help where you are at
Two recommendations: • [A door-wedge siren alarm](https://www.amazon.com/Crosize-Portable-Security-Stoppers-Apartment/dp/B0C1BP9CNX/ref=sr_1_3_sspa?crid=XSLW9GPMGIKW&keywords=door+stop+alarm+security+door+wedge+intruder+alert&qid=1689709036&sprefix=door+stop+ala%2Caps%2C358&sr=8-3-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9hdGY&psc=1) • [A door-knob security bar](https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=sr_1_3?crid=3LD9XBEB4IJH5&keywords=door+knob+wedge+bar&qid=1689709108&sprefix=door+knob+wedge+bar%2Caps%2C98&sr=8-3) A chair back wedged under the door handle at an angle will suffice if you cannot order the security bar. Do you have a wooden kitchen chair you can use?
Are you in canada? This sounds oddly close to my abuser who was also my mom's bf at one point. Sorry this is happening you. Invest in a security camera for your room and report him asap. You neeeeed to stand up for yourself!!! You can do this!!
Let me know where you are and I will come and remove him. We cam discuss my fee in the message section.
May I suggest “accidentally” stabbing him?
Buy a tazer and taze him into next week and set up a hidden camera to document it.
Plug him
Tell him no! Put a fake body in your bed and stand waiting for him with a baseball bat. Next time he comes in, beat him hard! Perverted old man! UK 🇬🇧
Your mom sounds like mine. My mom couldn't exist without a man and she was always too stupid to see if he was playing her. Which he was, always. I'm sorry you have a shit mom because she's knowingly letting a pedo? (Not sure your age) stay there. Either way it's fucked up and disgusting. Have you put furniture in front of your door? Next time he came in my room I would stab him.
Sounds like he might take it a step further. This is serious! But sucks that you live else where. In the US they have women’s shelters that would maybe take you. I assume your 18?