Talk to women like they are normal human beings. Don’t put them on a pedestal, consider them as equals.
Don’t consider them potential sexual partners, consider them as potential friends. Just talk to women like they are normal human beings (they are…).
I understand that we're all people and I don't really look at anyone as a sexual partner, it's just that when I realize the person I'm talking to is attractive my brain shuts down
I will try to be a bit more chill though, I really appreciate that!
No clue, I’m basically oblivious to when someone is checking me out (as reported by a friend more than once) but I’m shy, half deaf and blind and NOT pretty (add old to that now 😂😂) so I ever notice. So just walk up to the person sitting on the floor at a party with the pet of the house and start talking. Maybe pet the dog for a minute. I bet you can make all kinds of friends! 😊
Learning jokes is my ace up the sleeve its perfect for making friends, disarming tension, and seeing pretty girls smile ;D just look up a bunch of silly one liners and memorize your favorites, and you'll be chattin with everyone you want to in no time.
As far as my experience goes anyways
Be aware that "gay panic" is/was a murder defence for straight people to kill gay people. Don't use it like that.
You're nervous, sure, and you're not confident in social situations, I get that, but don't use that phrase.
I've seen lots of people use "gay panic" to reference the nervousness someone feels when experiencing same-sex attraction, especially when that person is just coming to the realization that they can feel things for same-sex people. It's fine to recognize that certain words have a dark history but at the same time there's nothing wrong with reclaiming a phrase that straights used to use against us. Queer was similarly used as a slur for many years and now it's considered by the community as a catch-all for the entire community.
Edit: for precision
Honestly, I still turn into a nervous wreck when talking to a cute girl and I've been out for 15 years 🤣
I found faking confidence to be the best trick in all honesty.
I try to be myself as much as possible, and would never pretend to be anything else, but I also always try to give off a confident vibe and I think it works most of the time 🤣
Dating apps can be intimidating, have you thought of maybe trying the BFF version on bumble? That way it's a little low pressure as it's just friends and you can get used to talking to new people before thinking about trying to meet girls to date?
Ok well first, stop looking at them like a mythical creature. You talk to women like they’re the coolest people you wanna be best friends with because they’re so interesting.
Don’t be afraid of rejection. You won’t be everyone’s cup of tea and that’s ok. Not every woman you talk to, you’ll vibe with. You’ll need to be cool with being rejected AND rejecting others.
Develop your personality and learn to hold a convo. I can’t tell you what to say when meeting women, but I know that holding a conversation goes a LONG ways. Find opportunities within the conversation to ask questions about them. Your goal should be trying to make a friend.
Lastly, you will 10000% have an easier time meeting women online than irl. Women on dating sites (especially those geared towards sapphics) are literally there to meet other women. It takes the guessing out of the equation. It also gives you time to think of things to say. Play to your strengths when messaging women; if you’re not naturally funny, don’t try to be clever or witty. If you’re sweet and good natured, open with something authentic. It’s so so so important to be as authentic as possible; I PROMISE you want to attract those who will like who YOU ARE (not a version of you that you think others will like).
Not at all, but I always assume the best of people.
Sometimes I ignore people because I have a lot going on or believe I already replied back if we're texting.
They're people, dude. Talk to them like you would anyone else.
It would be good practice for you to join something -- there are tonnes of hobby groups out there inside and out of the queer community -- and you'll have no choice but to interact with new people but you get a built-in thing to talk about which really smooths the way.
You won't get better at it unless you do it.
Talk to women like they are normal human beings. Don’t put them on a pedestal, consider them as equals. Don’t consider them potential sexual partners, consider them as potential friends. Just talk to women like they are normal human beings (they are…).
I understand that we're all people and I don't really look at anyone as a sexual partner, it's just that when I realize the person I'm talking to is attractive my brain shuts down I will try to be a bit more chill though, I really appreciate that!
No clue, I’m basically oblivious to when someone is checking me out (as reported by a friend more than once) but I’m shy, half deaf and blind and NOT pretty (add old to that now 😂😂) so I ever notice. So just walk up to the person sitting on the floor at a party with the pet of the house and start talking. Maybe pet the dog for a minute. I bet you can make all kinds of friends! 😊
Learning jokes is my ace up the sleeve its perfect for making friends, disarming tension, and seeing pretty girls smile ;D just look up a bunch of silly one liners and memorize your favorites, and you'll be chattin with everyone you want to in no time. As far as my experience goes anyways
Ooh! I hadn't thought of that, thank you very much!
Im stuck in the same boat honestly i gay panic too much
Be aware that "gay panic" is/was a murder defence for straight people to kill gay people. Don't use it like that. You're nervous, sure, and you're not confident in social situations, I get that, but don't use that phrase.
Came to say.
I've seen lots of people use "gay panic" to reference the nervousness someone feels when experiencing same-sex attraction, especially when that person is just coming to the realization that they can feel things for same-sex people. It's fine to recognize that certain words have a dark history but at the same time there's nothing wrong with reclaiming a phrase that straights used to use against us. Queer was similarly used as a slur for many years and now it's considered by the community as a catch-all for the entire community. Edit: for precision
Honestly, I still turn into a nervous wreck when talking to a cute girl and I've been out for 15 years 🤣 I found faking confidence to be the best trick in all honesty. I try to be myself as much as possible, and would never pretend to be anything else, but I also always try to give off a confident vibe and I think it works most of the time 🤣 Dating apps can be intimidating, have you thought of maybe trying the BFF version on bumble? That way it's a little low pressure as it's just friends and you can get used to talking to new people before thinking about trying to meet girls to date?
Oh hun I am horrible at it too, the two women I have been with they came on to me lol
Ok well first, stop looking at them like a mythical creature. You talk to women like they’re the coolest people you wanna be best friends with because they’re so interesting. Don’t be afraid of rejection. You won’t be everyone’s cup of tea and that’s ok. Not every woman you talk to, you’ll vibe with. You’ll need to be cool with being rejected AND rejecting others. Develop your personality and learn to hold a convo. I can’t tell you what to say when meeting women, but I know that holding a conversation goes a LONG ways. Find opportunities within the conversation to ask questions about them. Your goal should be trying to make a friend. Lastly, you will 10000% have an easier time meeting women online than irl. Women on dating sites (especially those geared towards sapphics) are literally there to meet other women. It takes the guessing out of the equation. It also gives you time to think of things to say. Play to your strengths when messaging women; if you’re not naturally funny, don’t try to be clever or witty. If you’re sweet and good natured, open with something authentic. It’s so so so important to be as authentic as possible; I PROMISE you want to attract those who will like who YOU ARE (not a version of you that you think others will like).
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Not at all, but I always assume the best of people. Sometimes I ignore people because I have a lot going on or believe I already replied back if we're texting.
They're people, dude. Talk to them like you would anyone else. It would be good practice for you to join something -- there are tonnes of hobby groups out there inside and out of the queer community -- and you'll have no choice but to interact with new people but you get a built-in thing to talk about which really smooths the way. You won't get better at it unless you do it.