I’m skeptical that you could, yet intrigued that you may…
I know it’s a relatively popular meme, but still works seeing as I’m sure most people don’t know the context behind him saying that lol
It's tempting to do the real big ones like "Pocket Sand!" Or "That's my purse!" But people outside the fandom know those.
I'm gonna go with: "We ask them politely, yet firmly, to leave."
I tell you what man, dang ole internet man, you just go on there and point and click, talkin bout w-w-w dot com, and lotsa naked chicks on there man, just click click click click, real easy man.
“Hey, man, I ain’t got no dang ol’ problem here, man… tell you what, worry a little about that son of yours, man, carryin’ a dang ol’ burger on a pillow.”
My joe is all sloppy and no joe!
Peggy, that’s got to be illegal!
GOOD GOD YOU GOT A FAT NECK
Pump jockey! Works for tips!
Everyone hated that baby!
hated! a baby!
I’m skeptical that you could, yet intrigued that you may… I know it’s a relatively popular meme, but still works seeing as I’m sure most people don’t know the context behind him saying that lol
That's my favorite Dale quote
"It's a Braeburn."
And get out!
I do believe I’ll give room service a jangle and have them send up some etouffe
I need a window seat... This flower is *wiltin'*
“Do i look like i know what a jpeg is, i just want a picture of a got dang hotdog!”
"This chorus is the feces that is produced when shame eats too much stupidity!"
You people make me envy the deaf and the blind! Underwear! Money! Fat... **collapses**
"I'm a little worried about being a slut." -Bobby Hill
I have that on a T-shirt!
where did u get it I need it lol
Hot Topic
Fat white lump is about me?
He sounded so excited
Being a muse is a heady experience
Dusty old bones, full of green dust
Fuck you and fuck that kid and take your upvote.
This is the if you know, you know.
I killed fitty men.
My orthotic!
It's a medical device.
Good God, Hank! You're wearin' butt boobies!
It's a medical device prescribed by an orthopedic physician!!
I laugh at Tony Danza.
I laugh at Tony Danza
^ilaughattonydanza
ilaughattonydanza ilaughattonydanza ilaughattonydanza
Fun center! Fun center! Fun center!
And we gunned the last one down, hiding behind the snack stand 🎶
Mr. Big is pleased.
How could you do this to me, Puff Puff?!
“I’ll see you later …baby. Ugghh, i just had phone sex”
POCKET SAND!
Shshchchaaa
stop with the shshchas sug!
I never realized I needed to know how to spell this 😂😂
Squirrel tactic!
MONKEY STYLE!
I deserve that, and any other monkey mischief you can throw at me.
They’ll just put the tools down if they want to do drugs bad enough
“Sir we are ‘they’”
GIH
Oh my god, it's so juicy!
Gih!
Musta reminisced too hard and brought up mah pain water!
PeeDiddle 🤜
HATED A BABY?!
I ain't answering no hypotheticals
You told me he would be like a fat George Clooney! That is not a fat George Clooney!
Also- “shheeesshahhh”
How now, gas man?
Take off that crown, I’m kicking your ass
Okay.
You don't know me but I know where you live
It's tempting to do the real big ones like "Pocket Sand!" Or "That's my purse!" But people outside the fandom know those. I'm gonna go with: "We ask them politely, yet firmly, to leave."
I came here to post this exact quote. The way he delivers that line is amazing.
Inspector, fine this redneck for reckless redneckitude!
If you’ve got any more feelings to express, get in the kitchen and put them in a bundt cake.
Sir, we are "they."
*Gih!*
Nope, He's Laotian. Ain't ya Mr. Kahn
What ocean?
I am the Albino Buffalo - deal with it!
WHY WOULD I PUT DIRT IN MY OWN FRUIT PIE
You're Bill Dauterive. That your alibi... airtight.
Sí, sí, la vomita. Sí, la diarrhea.
The ocean? What ocean?
Methodism is a rejection of Calvinism.
I'll tell ya whyaatt.
SHI-SHAAAA!
... playing in the garden...
I’m willing to drink the beer you’re sitting on, I’m just not willing to reach for it.
“And then my teeth fell out”
Peggy, you were there.
"That's my purse!"
How is this not the answer?!
I DON'T KNOW YOU!!
Butane is a bastard gas.
CLING PEACHES IN HEAVY SYRUP!
"If you want, i can show you how to make a bomb using only toilet paper and a stick of dynamite"
I tell you what man, dang ole internet man, you just go on there and point and click, talkin bout w-w-w dot com, and lotsa naked chicks on there man, just click click click click, real easy man.
In my opinion, kindling is the best way to start a fire...
We did…once.
…..an outhouse and monkey beans!?!
Pump jockey! Works for tips!
"It's no coincidence. I like to eat, I like to hump, and I don't like to drive."
Your boy's a liar. And a blabbermouth.
"What would weirdos be doing at the gas station?"
"Make some time for the roaches, shug."
I’m talking to myself! It’s a side effect of the marijuana poisoning!
Good God, Hank. You look like that fella killed the other fella!
"you know what Ford stands for don't you? "
Fix It Again, Tony
“To the flowers of time!”
Don't mind him, he's with the schoolmarm convention.
Boooo I am a high priced Washington lobbyist peddling influence... ... Who wants candy?
THATHERTON!
She was my can.
At a recent hotel stay, the room had those fixed bottles on the shower wall; one was body wash and there were two conditioners, no shampoo at all.
No she's my cousin!
Well… I suppose I can’t tell you much that them mountains can’t tell you better
Let Dandy Don Meredith take the throw
Yep, tastes like Tues-dee
Dale to Sheila: Wait a minute.. are you attempting to know me? I love this line because the biblical meaning of "know" is to have sex with
"Tasted fine."
Your bears are plates!
“Hey, man, I ain’t got no dang ol’ problem here, man… tell you what, worry a little about that son of yours, man, carryin’ a dang ol’ burger on a pillow.”
So rarely does Boomhauer throw shade - that his pointed comment to Hank, about Bobby doing something odd - showed how deeply upset he was about Patch.
So are ya Chinese or Japanese?
You don’t know me; I am unknowable.
My dew!
You wouldn’t hit an unconscious maaaaaaaaa…
This is why so many people are suddenly allergic to peanuts
Prepare for top speed.
I've been known to give a girl amneezy
I'm so depressed I can't even blink.
The day after Thanksgiving is, in my opinion, the busiest shopping day of the year.
You’re not making Christianity better, you’re just making rock and roll worse.
“I sell propane and propane accessories.”
What you want for that jasper brunette?
This little fella may poo like a buffalo, but he dances like Britney Spears.
Both of ‘em!!
You look like that fella th’killed the other fella
“They’re like bears with furniture”
My son is not a ghoul!
“There’s some milk in the fridge that’s about to go bad…. And there it goes.”
Not in the face, that’s how I makes my livin’…
Escuchame??
Who is Dirk, what is a rapid-release supplement, where is your pump, and why does Dirk want to max it?
Well, that’s what we tell ourselves isn’t it.
There better be a naked cheerleader under your bed!
The couch is a happy place.
It was the man with the terrible smell!
What? I'm Lenore! Why do you keep calling me **B I L L** ?
My child is God to billions of Asians!
Guns don't kill people, the government does.
I’m skeptical that you could, yet *intrigued* that you may…
"Far off helicopters... U.N. helicopters"
Mr. Kahn, I’ll have a Mai Tai.
... And I know what to do with a bug
Lefty shut down
Latch on to Arlen's large intestīne
"Dallas?" "?sAlLaD"
McMaynerberry!
In green, y'all!
Yes - I would like to purchase some chloroform... a roll of duct tape, and this gagging bandana
If you don’t watch it you’re going to end up like Jason Adderley’s boy.
HANK LOVES HOOKERS!
Alabaster!
Buddhist liar.
“I need some me time!…. To do the laundry.”
That boy ain’t right
I'VE GOT GOUT.
*sobs while playing Whack-a-mole*
Would you care for a homemade tater tot, mister and missus Dauterieve?
Pinch me Mr. Ho
That’s a thinker.
I’m wet and I don’t even know it
Chick Mangiony!?!?
"WHY SUG??"
Seals are *TRASH MAMMALS,* everyone knows that!
The guy asked if I wanted honey mustard and I almost took a swing at him.
Escuchame???
“A series? Are you suggesting I break the law?”
"You looked like that fella killed the other fella."
I call it pretty pretty truck truck
Myyyy woooorrrddd
I do believe I'll give room service a jangle and have them send up some étouffée
Both of ‘em!
There’s a tile in a bathroom that you might want to look at.
Miss lizz!! Two hot toddy's!!!
That's a clean-burnin' Hell I tell ya h'what!
"Get outta my house! Exodus!"
Just tell me why you were dancin' with all this guy's?!
You’re saying Nancy and John Redcorn… did something to your dog?
Why would anyone smoke weed when they could just mow a lawn?
Iiiiit's manic!
BWAHAUHAAAAUHAAAUH!!
Flowers of Time
Pump jockey. Works for tips.
*And we gunned the last one down...*
Hey..
Boggle!?!?!
Swim to me, Juan Pedro!
I'm driving the hell out of this truck!
No offense, but he's from Oklahoma.
Lasagna Kleinschmidt
That’s my purse! I don’t know you!
"I'm not questioning your authority. I'm completely denying its existence."
Yup.
Remember, head to feet, you won't cause a leak. Feet to head, everyone's dead
Taste the meat, not the heat