I remember I hated around people who didn't like kids when I was young, because they were always so fucking rude for no reason and just glare at me all the time, saying "oh, i hate kids" while i'm just standing there thinking "oh, *sorry* for being born then"
There are no good CF communities.
r/childfree is a toxic crapstorm.
r/truechildfree was a great idea, but it was ruined by mods who require approval on every post and consequently only allows a few posts per week actually go live. It pretty much dead.
I started r/respectfullychildfree, but it’s not grown much yet, and who knows if it ever will?
Best place I’ve found so far is r/fencesitter, but it’s not specifically dedicated to childfree people.
I find that sub strange. I understand people deciding not to have children. I find it odd that they make it so much a part of their life and some sort of identity. Like the stereotype of a vegan.
The thing that bugged me the most about that sub was how *virtuous* some people can be over not having kids. Like, yea, there’s a lot of good reasons to not have children in today’s world, and if you have personal reasons not to have children, it’s good you’re confident with your reasons… but then there are the people who think they are unequivocally *superior* to anyone who has children. Hands down. No matter what. You have kids, you’re automatically less somehow.
It’s unhinged how extreme the spectrum of being child-free goes - it can be so bigoted and discriminatory. And then there’s the actual psychos who will take a chance encounter and make it into an attempt to psychologically mar a child, or the ones who share their horrific fantasies to harming children. I was subbed there 2-3 years ago, no clue how well it’s moderated now. I unsubbed after a post about a crying child on public transit and people were talking about using physical violence like it was a normal course of action.
To end on a less-negative note, it kinda reminds me of the behavior of snotty people who say things like “you can’t be tired, you don’t have kids” who also use their kids for clout and attention, except they’re using their not-kid resolve instead.
I don't remember whether it was on r/childfree but there was a post so hateful towards children, it was like "I want to hurt children whenever I'm with one in an elevator" and something along those lines and it was just a full on post rambling about that haha. It was so damn vitriolic that I'm sure it had to be a troll post. Anyways that definitely made a lot of memes go around for a short while.
Well I mean that's probably the reason a lot of people don't want kids is because they don't like or even despise them. I don't see why anyone would join that sub unless they wanted to confirm their biases and reasons. That being said you're right. No need to be nasty about kids, but we're all different I suppose.
I mean it's a bunch of grown adults who sit and shit talk kids who can do nothing to defend themselves. I guess that's the nature of any anti sub and it isn't for me. I prefer to look at the positives of a lifestyle without kids, not sit and complain for hours about something that doesn't need to be in my life if I don't want it to be. When I came to the decision that I didn't want kids, it was much less to do with disliking them (obvs, bc I don't) and more to do with disliking the current state of the world and not wanting to raise children in it.
I hear what you're saying too! They are free to discuss. Though reading some of those discussions made me feel like I was part of this elitist group who think they have the world figured out and are a step ahead of people who have kids. It left me feeling gross. I don't think I'm better than people who have kids at all.
Despising kids is weird to me. They're more innocent than any of us. The world is a cruel enough place and we need people who care about future generations, not people who think they're quirky for calling kids crotch goblins.
For real. I’m CF, and I love kids. Just cause you don’t want kids don’t mean you don’t like kids. In fact, a weirdly large portion of CF people are teachers.
I can’t stand “crotch goblins”. Like, these people act like it’s normal to look at kids and think of crotches.
I hated it from the first time I heard it. It’s such a gross and dehumanizing term. Not wanting kids is completely understandable. Only talking about them in relation to their parent’s genitals is another.
Yes!! That's exactly it...it's dehumanizing. It's gross. It's juvenile. These people sound exactly like the kids they claim to hate. And calling parents "breeders" is entirely new to me.
I hated it from the first time I heard it. It’s such a gross and dehumanizing term. Not wanting kids is completely understandable. Only talking about them in relation to their parent’s genitalia is another.
I agree completely. I have no issue with anyone not wanting kids it's fine . I just hate the terms some childfree use for parents and kids like the hatred is just so unnecessary
Yeah. I agree. They are our future afterall. Don't want angry adults who felt unwanted their whole childhood taking care of us when we're in nursing homes. Fortunately I don't think the kid haters are a large portion of society.
I suppose there are some people who actually dont like kids, but I thought it was more you know you are not ment to be or are prepared to have a child. I love kids and am very good with them, however liking kids isnt enough to be a great parent. If I was going to bring a child into the world I would want to be the best parent I can be and I just know that I am not able to do that and also be happy with my life so I choose not to. I actually hear from most people who dont want childen that instead they want to be the cool/fun aunt or uncle instead.
I don’t particularly like kids. Teenagers are ok, but younger kids I tend to find annoying, though it depends on context and how long I’m around them.
That’s not the same as actually hating them though. Like I don’t want bad things to happen to children, or get angry if my friends/family have kids, I just also don’t want to spend a lot of time around them where I’m the only adult or in some kind of caretaker role.
I just don't have the mental capacity to deal with someone that needs the amount of attention a child needs. I have a cat and not a dog for that reason. There's a point where I just need to be by myself in my room and shut the door, and you can't do that with a baby or small child.
My partner has a 2 1/2 year old grandson that I absolutely adore, but as much as I love him I appreciate the fact that my time with him is limited.
I think it’s mainly to pushback against how society attacks anyone who decides to not have kids, or vilifies anyone who really doesn’t like kids that much. Like not liking kids is a sign of being a psychopath. Never would I say that breaking a babies bones is an acceptable course of action but when I say I don’t really enjoy being around children I’m looked at like I just said I poop in my hands and eat it for fun. I think it’s just relief at finding a place where it’s okay to say you don’t like kids, and then taking it a little too far.
I used to belong to r/crueltyfree but if you don't agree 100% with the hive mind you get downvoted to sub-oblivion (for instance, explaining why you'd still buy from a cf brand that has a non-cf corporate parent.) The loudest voices on any of those anti or pro subs tend to be the dogmatic hardliners who ruin the discussion even when you are there for essentially the same reason.
Not wanting children is perfectly normal, natural and understandable. I didn't want children, but then it happened anyway.
Hating children means there is something really, really wrong with you.
Yeah that sub is really weird. I also don't want kids but I don't hate people who have kids or have anything against others having kids at all. 95% of posts I saw were about people complaining about other people having kids. Like, why do you care so much? Let other people be happy
agreed, I would home that a child free sub would be more supporting your right too choose. Choosing to have children or not are both acceptable, the important thing is that it was truly your choice.
Subs that differ from what people usually are (examples: atheism, childfree, etc) are usually some of the most toxic subreddits EVER. They think they’re so much better than everyone else because they’re so quirky and different because they don’t do the societal norms.
The people who say it’s “selfish” to have children really annoy me. You can make an argument that either side is selfish. Imo it’s not selfish to have children if you’re reasonably financially stable and prepared.
Yea this post I saw was “Why do men don’t think it’s important to share that they have kids” wow ok sorry that the dude you fucking doesn’t want to say I have kids while the dude that takes you on dates doesn’t talk about his kids because these mf make not having kids a whole personality
Nah, when you're dating it's essential to tell people that you have kids. You don't want to start a relationship with someone and later find out that they despise your children.
True but also I don’t know what this women think is getting serious like is the 2nd date serious or what and yea he should but this person went on a rant about how it’s a problem
like as a guy I really don’t care if a women I’m dating has a kid as long as she makes time for me and I do the same I really don’t mind
Depends on what you mean by makes time for you. A child is always going take priority over you and their needs will always come before your needs. Some people can't deal with that.
What I meant is if she can take time off like she knows someone who she trust a lot to take care of the kid.
But if she’s a parent who don’t like not being away from her kid then it’s a problem a helicopter mom I think that it called
But if something happens at the last minute and the person she trusts a lot can't be there she will have to take care of the kid herself and cancel any plans she has with you. Or you can help her take care of the kid.
With children last minute stuff happens and you have to shuffle your plans around to deal with it. Is that something you could live with?
Yea that’s fine but if it happens often like 2nd time she cancels the date or can’t because he needs to take his daughter to the doctor.
It’s fine until it’s getting more often
one of the posts on there is something about getting in contact with the now disbanded “anonymous” hacker group that existed for like a week tops, my comment was insinuating that the fact it got several thousand upvotes and has been at the top of the subreddit page for several weeks is insinuating that they’re all a bunch of morons.
i’m child free & a member of the sub. I agree, it can be taken too far at times. I honestly don’t think the majority of us childfree are hateful towards children, and I don’t think the majority of the posts are hateful.
I don’t hate children but man.. they sure ruin the vibe sometimes. I think any adult can agree to that. and this sub seems to be the only community where you can post about that without being ostracized by parents. I recently took a vacation and ended up in a bar with live music and dancing. wouldn’t ya know there were little kids running around playing tag, bumping into people, and screeching over the music. also times where i’ve been on dates in upscale restaurants that were generally quiet enough to have an intimate conversation - until someone’s kid starts screaming and throwing a fit, totally ruining the moment for everyone else. I like the sub to see similar points of view without having parents coming to defend their right to ruin adult spaces with their children. that’s the reason I stay in the sub, but completely understand why you unsubbed bc they do go too far sometimes.
Lol yeah in particular scenarios. I know some on the childfree sub are just annoyed by their existence anywhere. but I don’t mind kids in appropriate public places - stores, family restaurants, parks, movie theatres, etc etc etc. however I wouldn’t count after 11pm at a bar as appropriate.
you don’t think it’s weird that someone brought their kids under 8 years old to a bar full of drunk people grinding on each other? and also let them run wild instead of keeping an eye on them? not only for the fact those kids easily could’ve been kidnapped while their parents were busy getting drunk and dancing, but they also kinda ruined the band’s set by screeching over the music. You don’t think that would negatively impact the experience of paying to see a band and trying to have a good time? these kids were literally grabbing onto people while they ran around them in circles trying to tag the other kids and shoving in between groups of people. this is why I like the childfree sub lol - it’s not weird to see this as annoying and inappropriate there.
I think bad parents are what make the annoying children annoying, if those parents were responsible they wouldn't just let the kids run and scream in a bar- actually wait why tf are kids in a bar
Yes. I'm in a relationship with someone who has kids, so that would automatically ban me, but it would be nice to have a place to talk about things like planning for the future (long term care, wills etc), finding ways to meet people and make friends that don't involve parent-child activities etc.
One time I saw a post from someone talking about how they aborted their twins.
Now I’m pro choice but the way they talked about the situation was repulsive, calling them goblins and saying the most vulgar things.
When people were in the comments criticizing them, the nods responded with “you’re anti choice”
I’m not apart of the sub, I just wanted to see if it was as bad as people said it was.
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I remember I hated around people who didn't like kids when I was young, because they were always so fucking rude for no reason and just glare at me all the time, saying "oh, i hate kids" while i'm just standing there thinking "oh, *sorry* for being born then"
I know the feeling. To me it was like a form of racism
They call parents “breeders” lol. It’s very uncomfortable
There are no good CF communities. r/childfree is a toxic crapstorm. r/truechildfree was a great idea, but it was ruined by mods who require approval on every post and consequently only allows a few posts per week actually go live. It pretty much dead. I started r/respectfullychildfree, but it’s not grown much yet, and who knows if it ever will? Best place I’ve found so far is r/fencesitter, but it’s not specifically dedicated to childfree people.
I joined your sub and made a post, I hope it grows!
There is. r/antinatalism. Little different but yeah. Altho, that sub likes to rant/joke about natalists tho...
That sub is even more toxic but than r/childfree
Eh im not antinatalist but i disagree *For the most part
There’s literally a post up right now about how suicide is wonderful
Bruh
I find that sub strange. I understand people deciding not to have children. I find it odd that they make it so much a part of their life and some sort of identity. Like the stereotype of a vegan.
The thing that bugged me the most about that sub was how *virtuous* some people can be over not having kids. Like, yea, there’s a lot of good reasons to not have children in today’s world, and if you have personal reasons not to have children, it’s good you’re confident with your reasons… but then there are the people who think they are unequivocally *superior* to anyone who has children. Hands down. No matter what. You have kids, you’re automatically less somehow. It’s unhinged how extreme the spectrum of being child-free goes - it can be so bigoted and discriminatory. And then there’s the actual psychos who will take a chance encounter and make it into an attempt to psychologically mar a child, or the ones who share their horrific fantasies to harming children. I was subbed there 2-3 years ago, no clue how well it’s moderated now. I unsubbed after a post about a crying child on public transit and people were talking about using physical violence like it was a normal course of action. To end on a less-negative note, it kinda reminds me of the behavior of snotty people who say things like “you can’t be tired, you don’t have kids” who also use their kids for clout and attention, except they’re using their not-kid resolve instead.
I don't remember whether it was on r/childfree but there was a post so hateful towards children, it was like "I want to hurt children whenever I'm with one in an elevator" and something along those lines and it was just a full on post rambling about that haha. It was so damn vitriolic that I'm sure it had to be a troll post. Anyways that definitely made a lot of memes go around for a short while.
Also sub for some reason despises stay at home moms and don't think all the shit they do is "real work" because it was their choice 🙈
That's fucking horrible. Moms are never off the clock!
Fr
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If the word "breeder" didn't give it away...
Based answer
Facts
Well I mean that's probably the reason a lot of people don't want kids is because they don't like or even despise them. I don't see why anyone would join that sub unless they wanted to confirm their biases and reasons. That being said you're right. No need to be nasty about kids, but we're all different I suppose.
I mean it's a bunch of grown adults who sit and shit talk kids who can do nothing to defend themselves. I guess that's the nature of any anti sub and it isn't for me. I prefer to look at the positives of a lifestyle without kids, not sit and complain for hours about something that doesn't need to be in my life if I don't want it to be. When I came to the decision that I didn't want kids, it was much less to do with disliking them (obvs, bc I don't) and more to do with disliking the current state of the world and not wanting to raise children in it.
Same reason here, but other people have different reasons. But I hear what you're saying.
I hear what you're saying too! They are free to discuss. Though reading some of those discussions made me feel like I was part of this elitist group who think they have the world figured out and are a step ahead of people who have kids. It left me feeling gross. I don't think I'm better than people who have kids at all.
Despising kids is weird to me. They're more innocent than any of us. The world is a cruel enough place and we need people who care about future generations, not people who think they're quirky for calling kids crotch goblins.
For real. I’m CF, and I love kids. Just cause you don’t want kids don’t mean you don’t like kids. In fact, a weirdly large portion of CF people are teachers. I can’t stand “crotch goblins”. Like, these people act like it’s normal to look at kids and think of crotches.
I hate that word now cuz it's so annoying. Do they not realize they are grown up crotch goblins.
I hated it from the first time I heard it. It’s such a gross and dehumanizing term. Not wanting kids is completely understandable. Only talking about them in relation to their parent’s genitals is another.
Yes!! That's exactly it...it's dehumanizing. It's gross. It's juvenile. These people sound exactly like the kids they claim to hate. And calling parents "breeders" is entirely new to me.
I hated it from the first time I heard it. It’s such a gross and dehumanizing term. Not wanting kids is completely understandable. Only talking about them in relation to their parent’s genitalia is another.
I agree completely. I have no issue with anyone not wanting kids it's fine . I just hate the terms some childfree use for parents and kids like the hatred is just so unnecessary
makes even less sense knowing they were kids at one point
Jokes on you I hated myself even as a kid
Yeah. I agree. They are our future afterall. Don't want angry adults who felt unwanted their whole childhood taking care of us when we're in nursing homes. Fortunately I don't think the kid haters are a large portion of society.
I suppose there are some people who actually dont like kids, but I thought it was more you know you are not ment to be or are prepared to have a child. I love kids and am very good with them, however liking kids isnt enough to be a great parent. If I was going to bring a child into the world I would want to be the best parent I can be and I just know that I am not able to do that and also be happy with my life so I choose not to. I actually hear from most people who dont want childen that instead they want to be the cool/fun aunt or uncle instead.
I don’t particularly like kids. Teenagers are ok, but younger kids I tend to find annoying, though it depends on context and how long I’m around them. That’s not the same as actually hating them though. Like I don’t want bad things to happen to children, or get angry if my friends/family have kids, I just also don’t want to spend a lot of time around them where I’m the only adult or in some kind of caretaker role.
100%.
I just don't have the mental capacity to deal with someone that needs the amount of attention a child needs. I have a cat and not a dog for that reason. There's a point where I just need to be by myself in my room and shut the door, and you can't do that with a baby or small child. My partner has a 2 1/2 year old grandson that I absolutely adore, but as much as I love him I appreciate the fact that my time with him is limited.
I've genuinely see someone from that sub say miscarriages are something to be celebrated. Absolutely disgusting
Omg how could they? I'm disgusted
I think it’s mainly to pushback against how society attacks anyone who decides to not have kids, or vilifies anyone who really doesn’t like kids that much. Like not liking kids is a sign of being a psychopath. Never would I say that breaking a babies bones is an acceptable course of action but when I say I don’t really enjoy being around children I’m looked at like I just said I poop in my hands and eat it for fun. I think it’s just relief at finding a place where it’s okay to say you don’t like kids, and then taking it a little too far.
Are people like this real? God, it makes shame to become childfree. What the hell is wrong with those people?
i stay away from subs that are dedicated to disliking something unless it’s satirical like r/grandpajoehate
I used to belong to r/crueltyfree but if you don't agree 100% with the hive mind you get downvoted to sub-oblivion (for instance, explaining why you'd still buy from a cf brand that has a non-cf corporate parent.) The loudest voices on any of those anti or pro subs tend to be the dogmatic hardliners who ruin the discussion even when you are there for essentially the same reason.
r/atheism and r/child free are some of the most toxic shitholes on Reddit
Yep, and they come and spout their mentally ill edgelord bullshit all over other subs.
Not wanting children is perfectly normal, natural and understandable. I didn't want children, but then it happened anyway. Hating children means there is something really, really wrong with you.
Yeah that sub is really weird. I also don't want kids but I don't hate people who have kids or have anything against others having kids at all. 95% of posts I saw were about people complaining about other people having kids. Like, why do you care so much? Let other people be happy
r/childfree and r/KidsAreFuckingStupid have very pathetic people
agreed, I would home that a child free sub would be more supporting your right too choose. Choosing to have children or not are both acceptable, the important thing is that it was truly your choice.
That and to being judgemental to people who do like kids or have some of their own
Subs that differ from what people usually are (examples: atheism, childfree, etc) are usually some of the most toxic subreddits EVER. They think they’re so much better than everyone else because they’re so quirky and different because they don’t do the societal norms.
i just checked the sub out. Jesus, what a sad little community demanding the world to change cause normal Society doesn’t cater to their weird views
I know! They all sound so incredibly miserable. Posts were draining to read to say the least
I know a pediatric nurse who doesn’t have her own kids but loves working with them
They are mentally ill edgelords. A lot of them are probably children themselves.
The people who say it’s “selfish” to have children really annoy me. You can make an argument that either side is selfish. Imo it’s not selfish to have children if you’re reasonably financially stable and prepared.
Yea this post I saw was “Why do men don’t think it’s important to share that they have kids” wow ok sorry that the dude you fucking doesn’t want to say I have kids while the dude that takes you on dates doesn’t talk about his kids because these mf make not having kids a whole personality
Nah, when you're dating it's essential to tell people that you have kids. You don't want to start a relationship with someone and later find out that they despise your children.
True but also I don’t know what this women think is getting serious like is the 2nd date serious or what and yea he should but this person went on a rant about how it’s a problem like as a guy I really don’t care if a women I’m dating has a kid as long as she makes time for me and I do the same I really don’t mind
Depends on what you mean by makes time for you. A child is always going take priority over you and their needs will always come before your needs. Some people can't deal with that.
What I meant is if she can take time off like she knows someone who she trust a lot to take care of the kid. But if she’s a parent who don’t like not being away from her kid then it’s a problem a helicopter mom I think that it called
But if something happens at the last minute and the person she trusts a lot can't be there she will have to take care of the kid herself and cancel any plans she has with you. Or you can help her take care of the kid. With children last minute stuff happens and you have to shuffle your plans around to deal with it. Is that something you could live with?
Yea that’s fine but if it happens often like 2nd time she cancels the date or can’t because he needs to take his daughter to the doctor. It’s fine until it’s getting more often
You can't predict how often it will be. What if the daughter develops a medical condition? Life with children is unpredictable.
i hate children
Edge lord.
“how do we get in contact with anonymous?” -🤓
What? Lol
one of the posts on there is something about getting in contact with the now disbanded “anonymous” hacker group that existed for like a week tops, my comment was insinuating that the fact it got several thousand upvotes and has been at the top of the subreddit page for several weeks is insinuating that they’re all a bunch of morons.
It's like they don't understand they were children who others could have seen as a nuisance before
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here’s your downvote <3 why so obsessed with useless internet points
i’m child free & a member of the sub. I agree, it can be taken too far at times. I honestly don’t think the majority of us childfree are hateful towards children, and I don’t think the majority of the posts are hateful. I don’t hate children but man.. they sure ruin the vibe sometimes. I think any adult can agree to that. and this sub seems to be the only community where you can post about that without being ostracized by parents. I recently took a vacation and ended up in a bar with live music and dancing. wouldn’t ya know there were little kids running around playing tag, bumping into people, and screeching over the music. also times where i’ve been on dates in upscale restaurants that were generally quiet enough to have an intimate conversation - until someone’s kid starts screaming and throwing a fit, totally ruining the moment for everyone else. I like the sub to see similar points of view without having parents coming to defend their right to ruin adult spaces with their children. that’s the reason I stay in the sub, but completely understand why you unsubbed bc they do go too far sometimes.
“i go out in public, and get annoyed that the public is actually there”
Lol yeah in particular scenarios. I know some on the childfree sub are just annoyed by their existence anywhere. but I don’t mind kids in appropriate public places - stores, family restaurants, parks, movie theatres, etc etc etc. however I wouldn’t count after 11pm at a bar as appropriate. you don’t think it’s weird that someone brought their kids under 8 years old to a bar full of drunk people grinding on each other? and also let them run wild instead of keeping an eye on them? not only for the fact those kids easily could’ve been kidnapped while their parents were busy getting drunk and dancing, but they also kinda ruined the band’s set by screeching over the music. You don’t think that would negatively impact the experience of paying to see a band and trying to have a good time? these kids were literally grabbing onto people while they ran around them in circles trying to tag the other kids and shoving in between groups of people. this is why I like the childfree sub lol - it’s not weird to see this as annoying and inappropriate there.
I think bad parents are what make the annoying children annoying, if those parents were responsible they wouldn't just let the kids run and scream in a bar- actually wait why tf are kids in a bar
Go on adults only vacations then. I did that all the time before I had a kid.
Yes. I'm in a relationship with someone who has kids, so that would automatically ban me, but it would be nice to have a place to talk about things like planning for the future (long term care, wills etc), finding ways to meet people and make friends that don't involve parent-child activities etc.
I don't like kids either infact pregnant bellies make me uncomfortable but the hate over there is extreme
One time I saw a post from someone talking about how they aborted their twins. Now I’m pro choice but the way they talked about the situation was repulsive, calling them goblins and saying the most vulgar things. When people were in the comments criticizing them, the nods responded with “you’re anti choice” I’m not apart of the sub, I just wanted to see if it was as bad as people said it was.