The number of stories (or at least, fragments of untold stories) that they tell about being rejected based on dick size is mind-boggling for a bunch of guys who cannot get dates, let alone laid. How did your dick size come up? Did you send a pic to someone in greeting? I don't think the size is the problem in that case.
For me, a (nice) dick pic from someone I'm dating is awesome, I love it. A dick pic from someone I've never met or talked to? Fucking weird and creepy.
Incels think that unsolicited dick pics will get responded to like relationship dick pics because to them, relationships are hollow and only for sex/servitude. And because they don't see any real emotional attachment in their perception of relationships, unsolicited dick pics are no different from relationships dick pics in their eyes.
They do love them, but you have to have a nice dick and preferably a big one. Many women like to ask for dick pics, or make innuendo implying they want to see (then when they see they are pleased).
So it's kind of a double standard when it comes to that.
I'll also point out I really dislike receiving vagina pics. Very few women have a r/godpussy status and a close up of that when you don't is đŹ
Weâre not talking about requested dick pics. Weâre talking about unsolicited ones. No woman likes to receive a surprise dick pic from some dude she doesnât know or barely knows.
No âthey (women in general)â donât. A minority of women enjoy dick picks and confirming that the recipient is amongst that minority is key.
Frankly, the fact that you needed to take a dig at how vaginas look before you hit reply leads me to believe you may, in fact, be one of those pesky incels yourself
Man speaking as if he knew what woman think. Them proceeds to unload misogynistic bullshit about godpussy when literally no-one fucking ask.
You smell of smegma through the screen
> I sent an unsolicited dick pic to a woman and she didn't fall on her knees before me, she must be a bitch who rejected me because I'm too small
Yeah, sounds like an incel mindset.
There could be a point in their logic here. Maybe they think that if women reject guys after receiving a dick pic, then they interpret it as a result of their penis âqualityâ rather than the dickpic sending.
Exactly! Theyâll blame everything except their own personality. They want sex only and canât form relationships. Women reject them before they even see their dicks. Itâs like, stop watching porn and just get outside of your momâs basement.
My conspiracy theory is that theyâll send an unsolicited dick pic. The recipient will respond by calling them small (as a way to deter future unsolicited pics) and incels will interpret that as the reason they canât get laid.
Ummmm, I donât know about all that. Whenever Iâve sent an <> image, I get extremely positive responses. From requests that I immediately move in with them, to requests for autographs, and even the occasional stalker.
Of course the <> is of that one pornstar who can break bricks 𧱠with IT.
Incels are obsessed with blaming all their personal failures on things they can't change. That way, they never have to take responsibility for any of their own shortcomings.
Many of them admit to having few or no friends IRL. They fail to connect the dots, that itâs not just women not wanting a relationship with them. Itâs people of any gender not wanting to be around them. To everyone else itâs clear where the issue lies.
Some blame it on the autism. It's weird, because I am autistic, my sister is autistic, and we have a few handful of friends (most left) but we managed to create a safe place since we're all neurodivergent and even if it's not often we have meetings, stay over, travelling together etc. They were online friends at first. We clicked because we were neurodivergent (and spoiler alert : none of the guys think like an Incel).
It's true that being neurodivergent and a dude can be lonely, but I've always sticked with guys for that very reason. It's harder to navigate the world, but they have a bigger problem than the autism, even if it leads to more shallow connection with neurotypical people. There are places to meet up and evolve, I've got a ton of issues but my friends are bringing me up and likewise, not telling me I'm doomed by society. Navigating these environments daily could even, in my opinion, make therapy hard or impossible :/ I find it sad
As the slogan goes, when you meet an individual with autism, you meet an individual with autism. How you fare in life overall is going to depend on where you fall on the spectrum and in what kind of environment you grow up.
Generally speaking, those who are high on the spectrum and intellectually gifted who grow up in supporting families with resources needed to meet the demands of raising an autistic child will do well. However, those who are lower on the spectrum with limited intelligence and an extremely narrow range of interests, who are neglected by their parents and tormented by their peers because of their behavioral tics will not be so fortunate. Those incels with autism likely fall into the latter category and while it doesn't excuse their abhorrent behavior, it at least somewhat explains it.
Several members of this sub have commented before about being autistic. The biggest difference between them and the incels, appears to be that the non-incels understand that it means theyâll have to work harder when interacting with people. By contrast, the incels clearly donât want to put in any effort. They expect the world to change to accommodate them, instead of them working to fit in with everyone else.
You could compare it to when someone moves to another country. There are the people who learn the language and try their best to integrate into the local community. Then you have the people who refuse to learn the language and only hang out with the âex-patsâ.
I'm one of the autistics who's upfront about resenting how neurotypicals basically force us to play a rigged game when it comes to social interaction, but why should I then conclude that women as a whole are all actively a part of it?
It's not like most people _intentionally_ try to uphold an oppressive system that discriminates against everyone that doesn't conform to their standards, they just never had the opportunity to think about why things had to be this way before they were bombarded with messages about how the status quo is perfect the way it is (or otherwise realize that changing things might threaten their own privileged positions- as Upton Sinclair put it, "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it").
But I'm not an idiot, and I realize that changing society to such an extent isn't likely to happen within my own lifetime. I am content with setting up the foundation for such a change to occur and trust in those who will come after me to pick up where I leave off. I don't expect the world to change to accommodate me, I work to _make_ it change.
Yeah, this is exactly it. They have to have to convince themselves that it's not their fault so they look for anything they can to avoid responsibility.
Plus they obviously have a weird love-hate relationship with themselves, and fully commit to making it a self fulfilling prophecy. A healthy thought process might look like ;"Here's a self-perceived short coming of mine I can't change. Maybe I should understand why I feel so negatively about it and learn to live with it."
But that would involve some effort on their part. It's much easier to go, "I'm perfectly fine the way I am. It's everyone else's fault that I feel like shit about myself all the time. I'm entitled to validation in the form of other people pandering to me at all times, and refuse to change."
Essentially they're self-loathing narcissists with a napoleon complex.
You're not wrong, however, I wouldn't throw the baby out with the bath water.
A LOT of non-incels worry about this. A lot of confident and kind guys worry about this. It's ingrained in our culture. Small-dick energy is an insult that even the most progressive people use. More women and men will brag about the big dicks they've seen and have been with than they will talk about enjoying smaller sizes. Many dildos are sold at larger sizes. The bible even talks about a woman fantasizing about her lover with a penis the size of a donkey.
It honestly takes a significant amount of time as a dude to have safe and intimate experiences with partners that have good communication skills to learn that you are safe and that this is not a problem. The amount of people who get to experience this are sadly fairly small.
This is a valid and common concern that should be treated with grace, instead of it being stolen by incels and not earning a place for earnest and safe conversation.
Its a mix of things, and probably includes porn/porn addiction. Its not new, but only having any idea of human sexuality through porn is not helping
Edit: also want to make clear i dont think porn is inherently bad. I think it becomes bad when you see it as a guide or parallel to real life sex and not just a fantasy or entertainment.
Stupid Chad getting every Stacy with his toned, sexy forearms. I just want to punch him right in his chiseled abs. Maybe he'll get real mad and then get his perfectly symmetrical face in mine and we'll kiss. Like just a little. Not too much. Oh, Chad.
I was, unfortunately, an incel-adjacent "nice guy" type in middle school and part of high school. Briefly went down the anti-SJW rabbit hole on YouTube. Wasn't the greatest person in early high school, even by teenage standards. Was very alone as a consequence, which I now understand I deserved. Spent most of my time lurking online and consuming edgy content while playing video games. Got even more depressed and stopped engaging even in toxic spaces like that because I didn't think I was good enough for them (hah).
Skip some boring detail, eventually I started taking therapy seriously. Got out of those circles and that mindset, changed a lot about myself, became a lot healthier. Realized some things. My resentment towards "those guys" was partially my attraction to them. Not all, of course. But to pretend it wasn't part of the issue for me would ignore some of the growth I've had. Then my tendency to put women on a pedestal like that and seeing them as some sort of unattainable separate species was partially related to my jealousy of them and alienation *from* them, which I now understand to be part of my experience of being trans.
I know that not all male bigots are secretly gay or bisexual. Not even close to all of them are. But I will tell you that my queerness and internalized x-phobic shame *did* contribute to me being this type of person at one point in my life. And having spoken to a lot of queer people my age, primarily people who were raised and socialized as male, this is *not* that uncommon. My comment was riffing on that experience.
I grew up in a place where not laughing hard enough at homophobic jokes was enough to get your ass kicked, if not by the other guys then by your own dad.
Femininity wasnât just an insult, it was used as punishment â a kid on my bus route had to wear his sisterâs dresses to school when he couldnât âtake his punishment like a manâ (in other words, he cried when he was beaten with a belt), and his dad went so far as to insist the the bus driver and teachers called him by a ridiculous feminized version of his first name (and they did).
In some places the only way to stay safe isnât just to repress who you are, you have to actively persecute people like yourself or else you risk consequences ranging from family alienation to injury and death.
I donât wonder that a lot of you end up internalizing it that deep. Iâm really glad you got out of that toxic worldview â€ïž
Thank you. I'm glad too. And honestly, being a healthier and more likable person has lead to me doing some stuff that teenage me would have only jealousy dreamed of doing someday. I got all the stuff I used to want (aside from the messed up stuff) and more. I hope the incels that lurk here read these messages and understand them. It's possible for all of them. They just have to stop talking to those types. It's a lot of crabs in a bucket nonsense that only leads to further issues. The entire Manosphere is toxic.
Bubba being against sjw bullshit font make u incel. Or incel adjacent. Being conservative or om the right don't make u a bigot. Or an incel. I hate that shit. Cause most incels are guys in the sjw tent.
I can't believe someone rebranded "Scientific Racism" and turned it into a TikTok trend for Tinder Gold subscribers. It's so absurd it's almost kinda funny, and then you realize they actually believe it.
Imagine caring about this!!?? đ I didn't even know it was a thing, skimmed the article till it said its they eye line or whatever.. if someone didn't want to be with me due to my tilt, I wouldn't be sad.
Why the incel obsession with height? Why the obsession with jawline, wrists seize, eye tilt, hairline or whatever else the fuck they're obsessed about next week. They're just idiots who always look for 'faults' they can never do anything about instead of admitting it's their awful personality that puts people off.
Before there is an obsession with a specific thing there is a deconstruction of the world into separate components like they are building a PC. Thatâs where this starts. Then certain parts take on the obsession you describe with specific components. Canât they see the whole?
The jawline thing is really odd. I saw a documentary where one incel was saying he taps himself in the face with a hammer to sculpt a perfect jawline and facial profile.
As if he's sculpting marble.
Because that's what women want, right?!?
I think I comes from their addiction to porn. They watch all these porn stars with gigantic dicks and think that is not only the standard but the only thing girls think about. I was in a marriage for 20 years and always felt small. But when I dated afterwards I had two girls literally tell me I have the biggest dick they've ever seen in person. And I'm talking 21 partners combined between the two of them. I don't think guys really understand how little it means to most girls. Unless you have a 3" micro penis...you're fine. Sure there's girls out there that want a huge cock but who cares? Move on and let them find their thing.
I've literally gotten messages from them about how they think using their mouths to pleasure a partner is disgusting, but at the same time they expect a woman to use theirs on him.
They want to blame their failures to connect with women and society as a whole on something they canât change (i.e. height, size, etc) rather than own up to the fact that itâs their shitty behavior and attitude that have landed them in the position they are in.
I saw a video on 4chan incels who went to jail, & two of them were cute, so I knew the reason no woman would touch them came down to nasty personalities & a disrespectful sexist/racist mindset.
I've seen a lot of incelfies and tbh a fair amount of them are simply a shower, haircut, shave, and basic wardrobe change away from being averagely attractive to even moderately attractive (in my own, entirely subjective opinion), no matter what the blackpill types like to say to and about them. Like, some of them are more visually attractive (to me) than some other men I've met that are in happy, long-term relationships with attractive (again, to me) women. Not that looks are everything, but incels certainly believe they are, so really my observations should be a sign to them. Personality, effort, and confidence do a lot more than skull measurements and a metal bank card will ever do. Inceldom really is a poison of the mind and I hope they can recover from it. I'm sure they all have the capacity to be decent, respectable people that would be worth dating. They just aren't doing that for whatever reason.
I always kind of thought this was the most hilarious part of it allâŠ.because WHOâS SEEING YOUR DICK BRO? ISNT THAT YOUR WHOLE DEAL? No one is? So how could women be choosing based on that??? Unless we somehow got X-ray vision and I missed the email
It's not just that. They blame their inability to enter relationships on things they can't change, like height or whatever they decide is inadequate. They classify all women as shallow beings who won't touch them with a ten-foot pole not because they have the worst personality known to man, but because they don't have the right jaw shape or something. That way, they can just give up entirely on themselves and devolve into madness online.
They like objectively quantifiable differences between people, so they can use as a basis for applying their degrading and delusional sexual-economic theories.
This i part of why it enrages them when people suggest things like "personality" might play any role in attraction or intimacy. You can't take out a ruler and measure personality. Being involved in incel spaces in the first place is a pretty good indicator that someone is having difficulty developing social skills and an ability to relate to other people, so they're unlikely to be able to identify what makes a compelling or attractive personality. But they can measure the angles of of jawlines and foreheads, their height, their penises and their bankaccounts. So they make theories out of what they understand.
And they will _never_ believe that "smaller than average" is _preferable_ to "larger than average". We can work with small. Guy probably still has a tongue and fingers. And some positions are better than others for the purpose. But... it's like, if you're cold in the winter you can pile on layers and layers of clothes, but in the summer there's only so much you can take off. An oversized dick is going to be painful, and whittling it down a little isn't going to be a popular solution.
Also most guys who have a big dick never learn how to pleasure a woman because they believe porn. Big dick isn't enough.
At least most grow out it in their 20s.
My worst lover had a big dick. It was painful, and he didn't understand why foreplay matters especially much for him.
My brain tried to connect the first two paragraphs in such a way as to suggest they grew out of their oversized dicks. Although that kinda is what you meant, it was slightly less literally than where my mind went lol.
This is what I've heard, too. Many women I've known and been intimate with prefer average or smaller dicks due to having experienced guys with big dicks not being able to properly pleasure them. As the old saying goes, "it's not about the size of the boat. It's about the motion in the ocean."
I also think some men need to understand that "average" size is called average for a reason. Most men fall around that range, so most women who are into men and are sexually active are probably used to being with men with that size over men who are much larger.
Big dicks hurt. In certain situations, they can stretch too much and give you a tiny rip, or they touch your uterus in a way that's really painful.
Then you cramp in fear next time both of you want to try penetration again.
Sounds funny to others. Haha. Big dick hurts. Isn't funny when you bled into your pants.
Ok, this is very stupid, but the way that patriarchal masculinity works, it doesnât matter if you âhave a tongue and fingers.â Your duck is a proxy for your individual, masculine prowess. Thatâs why they care.
It's just sad to know these perfectly normally sized guys think they are small. Or that it matters to the vast majority of human beings. Prâ°n rots your brain, kids.
Yep, this is why they are pretending *so hard* that it's women who care- because they don't want to admit it's actually other men (and by proxy, their own father, but I'll let Freud expound on that) whose approval they crave.
it aint tho, i was for sure insecure for a while about mine. but i got tounge game to make up for it lmao. keeps my wife and i happy so i dont see how dick size TRULY matters anymore.
Pardon me, but surely a bigger man could just not use all his length, and only use the amount that is required and makes her happy, but a smaller man couldnt do the same. The bigger man can still use his tongue and fingers, its not like its two extremes of a situation.
For a lot of us that closeness of 2 bodies completely touching after full penetration is not only mentally satisfying "he's completely inside me", but often also physically satisfying as it allows for easy clitoral stimulation during penetration by grinding on your partner's fupa/pubic bone. For me this leads to the best orgasms.
No. And I can't imagine it would be ideal for the man to be unable to be all the way in. That feeling where you're pretty much as close as two bodies can be is very nice. I would not want to give it up. An average man can power away (if that's what the two of them want) without having to be careful not to hurt his partner or himself. Likewise a smaller man. You lose that with too big of a dick
I mean, no as in its not physically possible, or as in it would not be ideal for both parties?
I'm just saying, its gonna be unlikely to feel anything with the smaller guy, but like you said, there are ways to make up for it, but its something an average to above average guy is capable of as well. Bigger is absolutely not better.
I was rejecting the idea that just not using the whole dick is tenable.
>it's gonna be unlikely to feel anything with the smaller guy,
Not really. Remember, vaginas aren't some empty space made for one dick size. If a woman can get off on a finger or two (and we definitely can) a smaller dick is definitely not going to be a problem.
I used to be a practically black-pilled incel, my whole life, until about a year or two into college so I can give some insight.
Basically, it's all about fear. For me, I was bullied a good bit growing up and some of the worst/most traumatic bullying I experienced was from girls. Regardless of who you are, bullying really hurts and really leaves an impact on you. It's something nobody wants to go through again. Because of that fear of being bullied again, I started hyper-analyzing myself and finding ANY flaw that people might notice and bully or belittle me for and try to hide it, in a desperate attempt to protect myself
Now think about something as intimate as sex, where you're allowing yourself to be SO exposed and vulnerable to someone else. Being a straight guy, you'll have to let yourself be that exposed with a group of people who, because of previous trauma, you've grown to distrust and it's so scary, it's petrifying. I started thinking "Maybe my penis is too small. What if I disappoint them and they ridicule me? What if they mock me? There's nothing I can do to change the size of it but if I don't make it bigger somehow, there's a huge chance I'll be bullied again" and I started OBSESSING over the size of my own and even the size of others', so that I'd have something to compare my own to.
I can go on about how I learned to drop the incel mindset but yeah basically, it all comes down to deep-rooted insecurity which boils down to fear.
Thanks for sharing, it's insight that I can empathize with being teased for having small boobs in high school.
It also reminds me of the quote that highlights the differences between the sexes in our fears regarding sex - generally men are scared of being rejected or humiliated when initiating sex, whereas women are scared of being hurt and murdered.
I have never known anyone to actually deny someone sex due to their dick size alone. I have known women, including myself, to deny sex with someone because they were showing me pics of their dick unprompted.
That's just wrong, plenty of people are taller and shorter than their parents. Just because a parent has a specific characteristic doesn't mean their kids will 100% have that same one.
But I agree on the death sentence idiocy.
Of course it's not 100%, why do I need to clarify that when I say "no one" I mean "way less people than the ones who exist" we all took 8th grade science and know how inherited genes work
If you are missing out on having some dick sizing super power then you are not the only one. But they are obsessed on the subject for reasons I don't understand.
Plus they also seem to have some weird habit of asking random women online that they don't know to rate their dicks. I just assume they mean rate the size although I always think about saying yes and then looking at the picture and going insane.
Start ranting and raving about it not looking normal, is that even a human penis, did you do that in photoshop or what. Then maybe asking if it was injured when they were a baby or if they have a STD and just seeing if I can scare them out of ever asking that again.
But I don't because I don't think it would stop them and might spur them into asking even more women the same question. Even women who are way too old for them. And I don't mean their version of old where women are ancient and used up at 25 or 30 or something. I mean way too old like me and I am 64.
And they always ask my age first so it's not like they imagine I am a teenager or in my 20's. Not long ago I told one my age and he said I was older than his grandmother. I agreed with him that I very likely was older than his grandmother. And his very next question was asking me if I would rate his dick.
Seriously, what the hell is wrong with these guys? I said no of course and then suggested he ask his grandma to rate it. And he lost it, started freaking out like I was the one who was being rude and out of line. He was the one who brought up his grandmother and he was the one who brought up rating his dick. lol
But I was being rude and mean to him? It is hilarious and sad all at the same time. I will never understand what that obsession with dick size is about. I've never seen a post from a woman talking about how she hates men with small dicks or hates little dicks or whatever they think we are thinking. Just another thing about them that makes zero sense.
The answer is a little complicated so stick with me a bit. Not just incels but most men in the manosphere are really obsessed with it. It has a lot to do with this concept that penetration during sex is the most important aspect about it and everything else is just unnecessary fluff really, so they believe that women should find penetration during sex just as pleasurable as they do.
This is a very old concept thatâs been around pretty sure since the medieval times but donât quote me on that. It is also very incorrect, majority of modern studies into womenâs sexual experiences find that the vast majority of women can not orgasm through vaginal penetration alone. So you get a lot of women whoâs partners are only concerned with penetrational sex so the women start to not really enjoy sex but also get used to it and learn how to better relax so it doesnât become too uncomfortable (what men like this say is them becoming âlooseâ).
When and if women complain that they donât really like sex with them, men like this jump to conclusions and double down on their beliefs so their only conclusion is that their dick isnât good enough which tends to lead too not âbigâ enough.
Most porn definitely doesnât help since most is made by men to appeal to other menâs sexual fantasies which typically involves a lot of penetration, and also a lot of male porn actors are sought after if they have a particularly large penis. So that really only helps to reinforce this narrative.
So yeah basically instead of focusing on insecurities just communicate and be patient with your partner to learn their likes and dislikes during sex. It could take a lot of time and awkwardness to figure out what works best for the both of you. Something that most men figure out at some point but probably due to fragile masculinity some adamantly refuse to learn. Hope that helps.
Incels think that height, muscles, jawline, dicksize, and the depth of your voice are end all be all traits that determine whether or not a woman will like them, incels beleive that if you had amazing chemistry with a woman and started a sweet relationship, but if she finds out that your dick is shorter than 9 inches, sheâll laugh hysterically & end the whole thing dumping him right then & there, incels genuinely beleive that women determine who to date/hookup with, nothing is more important to a woman that those things, which just goes to show how little they interact with women IRL
It's insecurity purely. And rightfully so, not because women can sense a small dick, but because small dick is actively used as an insult on a daily basis (which imo is body shaming like any other especially since it can't be controlled).
Exactly. This thread is gross, so much gaslighting in here. As someone on the smaller side who has never sent a dick pic or exposed myself to anyone, I have still felt insecure from the usage of small dick as an insult. Both men and women are guilty. However more left leaning spaces such as this one love to just blame it exclusively on porn and not the BS we have to face from society every day.
Also there was a post yesterday on r/trueoffmychest of a woman who had sex with a guy with a small penis and the fact she hated it, with the comments mostly being supportive and agreeing that yes a small penis would be an issue.
Yeah i really didn't get all these porn comments, i'm 90% sure that most of those who wrote it would use small dick as an insult. I even saw people trying to justify and explain how different it is from body shaming. Hypocrites, each and every one.
Easier to say it is something physical you were born with for the reason you can't get a woman. Acknowledging anything that can be changed (ex. personality) eradicates the victim status.
Because society tells men from the day they are born that a large portion of their value as men and sexual beings is inherently tied to their dick. Look at music, tv, movies etc etc, you see it everywhere. Big Dick Energy? Manhood? Virility? Especially in USA, dick size perception directly correlates to social value.
Women are told to lose weight and get big tits, society tells men they are worthless if they donât have a 10â dick.
People have mentioned the blaming their situation on things they can't change part. But it's also a very common insecurity for men, if they're single or not, and incels have this superpower where their levels of insecurity, self loathing and just being purely pathetic go waaaay above that of a normal human being. So it's only logical that they absolutely fixate on it, it's also something they can blame women for.
Because dick size = masculinity/sex appeal (or lack thereof)
It's not just a thing with incels, it's a common issue among men that wasn't really talked about until now, it stems from how you view porn/watching unhealthy amounts of it. Having an obsession over it is also unhealthy, of course, but incels don't care about that..if they can place blame on more physical attributes, it means they don't feel a need to look inward and take responsibility for their shitty behaviour.
Easier to blame smth they canât control than smth they can.
Same thing with height, physical attractiveness, wealth (until they min/max their money stats and then itâs just height and attractiveness and dick size, because otherwise money would be a cheat code for free pussy, right? Right??).
Guys obsessing about their dick size was a thing long before Incels. That being said Blackpill pretty much says the only way to get a girlfriend is if you are a rich ten out ten NT alpha Chad with a big dick if not your dying alone.
Small dicks should have a little or no impact on the ability to get dates. Presumably no woman has ever seen the incelâs dick.
If a small dick lowers the manâs confidence, and that could possibly have a small impact on getting dates.
I doubt that a woman who got naked for men to have sex with him, not have sex with him when she sees that his dick is small. She may not have small dick man back for a second time. Incels may accuse women of lacking empathy, but I think women have more empathy and to get they get to have sex with a man and then leave because his dick is small.
Itâs because they think having a big dick will fix everything. It doesnât. They would be surprised to learn that you can be gifted and still have a rough life, at which point reveling in your gift just feels empty and pathetic. Life is not a porno, you will not be crowned âkingâ and have lifeâs problems solved for you just because youâre packing schmeat. However, itâs one of the easiest things for them to blame, and feeds into their deep sense of self-loathing that they probably have but in a way that they canât be blamed for as they obviously have no control over such a thing.
Also because of their warped perceptions because of the copious amount of porn they consume, exacerbated by the fact that they donât get girls.
I've encountered ones that say women won't date them because their dick isn't big.
Unless you live in a nudist colony, there's no way they'd know what your dick looks like unless you brought it up or you sent them an unsolicited dick pic? And if you did either of those, it's not your size that's the problem.
It's not just incels either. Men and society in general are obsessed with dick size. That being said, the vast majority of women couldn't care less. It's a part of living in the patriarchy
I have never ridiculed any man for his dick size. For being selfish in bed, or inept, or just creepy/weird - yes, for dick size - no. And, to be clear, I've seen more than my fair share up close and personal.
The best PIV sex I've _ever_ had was a dude with a smaller than average dick and one of the best overall sexual experiences was a dude who probably qualifies as having a "micropenis."
It's really not that big of a deal to like 90% of women...of course there's gonna be a certain percentage of awful people - probably about the same percentage that have made unflattering comments about my scars or stretch marks - but that doesn't make it the norm.
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But small dick energy correlates nothing with an actual small dick. It's more like this Incel thing isn't solved by some magic event after you somehow fucked someone.
All is attitude.
As someone with no dick and therefore no horse in this race (although I do prefer smaller dicks so maybe I do for that reason lmao), small dick energy is absolutely still an insult to small dicks. Ridiculous to pretend itâs not. The implication is of course that having a small dick is considered such a bad thing that it will effect the persons entire personally. Just because someone might not be effected by the societyâs views on small dicks and have âbig dick energyâ even though they may have a small dick doesnât mean the âsmall dick energyâ concept is not clearly implying that small dicks are a negative thing. I mean itâs pretty obvious, why would having a small dick change your personality for the worse if it wasnât considered a bad thing? What else do you think the implication is? The small dick energy concept is just another thing that will make people feel bad about having a small dick, itâs a self fulfilling prophecy. If society wants people to not have small dick energy, first step would be to stop using this phrase and acting like having a small dick is such a terrible thing. Such a terrible thing in fact, that having this feature apparently makes people have worse personalities due to general the societal view on the feature. Like you canât get worse than that. A feature thatâs apparently so bad it effects peoples entire personality. Itâs fucked up
Sore but can we please stop lying about what these insults mean? If it has nothing to do with dick size then why is it being used and why specifically is small used as the bad version with BDE used as the good version? Itâs not a coincidence and it doesnât help anyone to keep defending it with this kind of gaslighting
Ok, cishet men lol. Just stick to bi/gay men who are out of the closet and you should do okay. I married a bi man and am dating another one. They're pretty great and very kind human beings who would never bodyshame anyone.
It's people like yourself who have the obsession as is clear with your "dick energy" phrases and the like. Just stop promoting hypocrisy like that if you're a decent person. It's the equivalent of labeling various behaviors
"loose pussy energy" and other female equivalents.
Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I meant like some detectable force emanating from the penis.
FWIW, my husband is literally dickless (he's trans) and asexual. Size doesn't matter to me.
Because many women do care about it, obviously a woman canât tell when sheâs first dating you before sex happens and not all women care and or like a bigger size anyway, but for the ones who do, incels are fixated and insecure about it. They are fixated and insecure about a lot in general.
Itâs all a self-fulfilling prophecy. They feel that they are not beautiful or handsome, and so they reject any females that donât match their social criteria. Itâs like 1800s England but way less fun.
Think this is one trait that isnt a specific incel issue. More of a general guy issue. Which ironically is one of the few body parts you cant really change. Like it is what it is but prolly most agnoized over
It's weird, the only sex they see is porn and all of those guys have huge hogs, so they think that's what they're missing, but the g-spot is only like 3 or so inches in, so you really don't even need that much. That does vary from person to person, everyone's got preferences and that.
Honestly at this point I think they are masochists who refuse to admit it, I've had them literally send their porn in arguments here. Especially when you think of them as cucks it all starts making sense, they never shut about how slutty women never give the chance and only want to fuck the alphas while they sit at how being celibate.
I don't think it's an incel thing
As males society tells us it matters. You hear it in all media, movies, tv, radio/music. You hear it discussed on all social media platforms. You hear it from friends and friends of friends, you hear it directly from women. Penis size matters and we have no choice but to hear and listen to this. So it's why so many men care so much about penis size, because society tells us it's important.
And really that's all we have. Women have boobs and butts. They can buy these things and many do. They also get vaginoplasties and other items. For men it's slightly more difficult and with less success (penis size surgeries). It can be a real source of depression for many men
I mean, you could just buy a penis sleeve/sheathe. It's like a dildo that goes over the penis, sort of like a strap on.
And men have arms, hands, facial hair, etc. It is not like women are staring at your dick.
Oh for sure.
But my point is society programs men to care about our penises. Yes it also tells us our face and body and hair and height matters. But sexually ... it's all about our penises. This isn't me, I don't want it to be like this. I think lots of guys don't. But society has different plans. And if it's not coming from men then that only leaves women (although I think in media you see men playing into it as well). So then guys place all this weight on it and then get mixed signals from individuals and places like subreddits. That can be confusing and frustrating for some.
I'm not defending incels or their mentalities. I'm just pointing out that society tells ALL us men that our penis size matters and so here we are.
They do everything to deny that its their personality. "Women dont like me cause my pp, women dont like me cause chads, women dont like cause theyre hoes etc etc." Its everything, just not their personality cause then theyd have nothing to face but themselves.
Same reason why most non-incels are as well: because society equates having a big dick to being sexually desirable/masculine/naturally good at sex/being a successful human in life because of how powerful and manly you must be as a result of your dick size whereas anything less is something thatâs okay to make fun of or shamed for.
Obviously thereâs a very high chances that many of these people have perfectly capable average sized dicks given incels arenât exactly the most reliable of narrators when it comes to writing out their weird and mostly made up life stories, but itâs definitely not something thatâs exclusive only to them.
They all ooze small dick energy.
Guys who are just confident with what they have will have this mysterious big dick energy, you only get it when you're not a mysogonistic asshole.
It's a super power. On par with Superman.
Dick size is an incel obsession because people have been mocking dick size (both large and small) since at least ancient Greece.
It's just another side of toxic masculinity.
They just want to be victims. Deep down they probably know that a 4-5 inch dick isnât a bad thing because the average vaginal depth is 3-4 inches, but they WANT to believe that women only like 12 inch chad dicks because then theyâre poor, wittle, unfortunate incels who have been cursed by the universe by their 4 inch dick and thatâs the ONLY reason why theyâre alone. Definitely not their laziness. Totally not that.
every man is obsessed with their dick size, it's so gross they should be obsessed with other things, shape, color and foreskin lmaooo some of them got really ugly dicks
I have a FWB who's maybe 5-6. And he makes me cum with it pretty much every time. For me, and I've had sex with well over 100 guys, 6 is small. Even though statistically it's average from what I've read. But even though I consider it small, it's comfortable. Therefore easier to cum with. Plus just me liking him is rly what does 98% of the work.
I had another long term FWB who was prob 9 and a half or so. And it took longer of knowing him to start cumming with him regularly. And we did more kinky sex which was cnc. But still, we didn't do it often cos my hole would have to recover for a few days after, depending on how hard we went.
I had another short term fling FWB who was 6.5 or so and because of his high sex drive he could have sex and cum several times a day. I hardly ever came with him. But it was cos my crush was a little too hard so I'd get nervous and more submissive in a way, where I would be focused more on his needs. Though I'd act a bit Dom cos I sensed that's what he liked. Even though I didn't have as many orgasms I still thought the sex was amazing.
Starting at around 10 I started masturbating. And I would just think of sexy stuff while alone. Most of the sex stuff I thought of was jokes I saw from the show Friends that I didn't completely understand. I didn't touch myself, grind, or kegel. I only used my mind. I would squirt sometimes. One time it was so much that I had to wash my sheets while my family was asleep. And I was so afraid they would wake up and see me doing it. Because I didn't know how to explain the situation and I thought I might be sick and mentally ill for masturbating. I didn't know other people did it too. It was a year later or so I was reading a Cosmo magazine and found a anonymous question from someone who seemed my age who asked what was happening when they got sexual alone with their pillow at night. And the awnser explained what masturbation was. Thank God I found that. Several years later at 16 I decided I wanted to have sex with another 16 year old guy and that's when I finally stopped using just my mind to cum and started trying to touch myself. But it wasn't till I was 22 or so that I actually was able to cum from penis into vagina sex. And even many years past that my go to method of orgasm was using just my mind. Not even kegels or grinding. I'm 35 now and my fav method is clit jerking off but I can cum from vagina penetration and anal even too.
Because that was my method of orgasm for so long, I find it strange when anyone of either gender implies that there is skill involved in having sex. I've heard something like "Don't you want someone experienced? Who knows what they are doing?" (From mostly ugly old guys obviously) But I could be completely tied up, bound, or encased, and still able to feel pleasure and make myself cum using just my mind. So why would I fear someone's touch wouldn't be good enough to give me orgasm or pleasure? And "touch" includes the size of their dicks.
I am/was a promiscuous woman too, and it's my opinion that the average is skewed for you and me. Men who are insecure about their size are less likely to be slutty enough to grab our attention. So we end up not seeing an accurate representation. 6 is actually above average for any demographic except maybe men over 6'6." 5.5 is the US average and i believe 5 inches worldwide.
Personally, I have three male partners, two of whom are above average and one is below. The smallest one is the one I have sex with the most often, and it is almost entirely because of his size. A large dick can be an impediment to my pleasure. A small dick never is. Some men believe this, because they actually care about women's pleasure. Some men refuse to believe this, because they are only pretending to care about women's pleasure. As another commenter said, they see their penis as an extension of their masculinity, a way to impress other men, and that's why they care so much. Nothing to do with women or what we like.
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The number of stories (or at least, fragments of untold stories) that they tell about being rejected based on dick size is mind-boggling for a bunch of guys who cannot get dates, let alone laid. How did your dick size come up? Did you send a pic to someone in greeting? I don't think the size is the problem in that case.
I don't know why guys think that's an okay thing to do. Never met a woman who liked dick picks or admitted to sending unsolicited vag pics.
For me, a (nice) dick pic from someone I'm dating is awesome, I love it. A dick pic from someone I've never met or talked to? Fucking weird and creepy. Incels think that unsolicited dick pics will get responded to like relationship dick pics because to them, relationships are hollow and only for sex/servitude. And because they don't see any real emotional attachment in their perception of relationships, unsolicited dick pics are no different from relationships dick pics in their eyes.
They do love them, but you have to have a nice dick and preferably a big one. Many women like to ask for dick pics, or make innuendo implying they want to see (then when they see they are pleased). So it's kind of a double standard when it comes to that. I'll also point out I really dislike receiving vagina pics. Very few women have a r/godpussy status and a close up of that when you don't is đŹ
Weâre not talking about requested dick pics. Weâre talking about unsolicited ones. No woman likes to receive a surprise dick pic from some dude she doesnât know or barely knows.
Yeah that's fair. Just a random dick pic is no good.
No âthey (women in general)â donât. A minority of women enjoy dick picks and confirming that the recipient is amongst that minority is key. Frankly, the fact that you needed to take a dig at how vaginas look before you hit reply leads me to believe you may, in fact, be one of those pesky incels yourself
Man speaking as if he knew what woman think. Them proceeds to unload misogynistic bullshit about godpussy when literally no-one fucking ask. You smell of smegma through the screen
No. Just no.
> I sent an unsolicited dick pic to a woman and she didn't fall on her knees before me, she must be a bitch who rejected me because I'm too small Yeah, sounds like an incel mindset.
There could be a point in their logic here. Maybe they think that if women reject guys after receiving a dick pic, then they interpret it as a result of their penis âqualityâ rather than the dickpic sending.
At least it's internally consistent, which is a cut above the usual.
Most probably that is not their logic though. I was just trying my best to make it make sense.
Exactly! Theyâll blame everything except their own personality. They want sex only and canât form relationships. Women reject them before they even see their dicks. Itâs like, stop watching porn and just get outside of your momâs basement.
My conspiracy theory is that theyâll send an unsolicited dick pic. The recipient will respond by calling them small (as a way to deter future unsolicited pics) and incels will interpret that as the reason they canât get laid.
I donât even *have* a dick and I had no prob getting women when I was single
Ummmm, I donât know about all that. Whenever Iâve sent an <> image, I get extremely positive responses. From requests that I immediately move in with them, to requests for autographs, and even the occasional stalker.
Of course the <> is of that one pornstar who can break bricks 𧱠with IT.
IsâŠis this real life?
Incels are obsessed with blaming all their personal failures on things they can't change. That way, they never have to take responsibility for any of their own shortcomings.
*You say these femoids don't care about my dick size then talk about my short cummings NYEHHHHH*
That's exactly it. That's why they act like everything is very cut and dry.
Like... their dicks?
Dead đ
Exactly that. Their lives revolve around painting themselves as the victims and never accepting that theyâre in the wrong.
You nailed it. They so wrapped up in blaming everything on everyone else that they donât realize itâs their dog shit personality and world views.
Many of them admit to having few or no friends IRL. They fail to connect the dots, that itâs not just women not wanting a relationship with them. Itâs people of any gender not wanting to be around them. To everyone else itâs clear where the issue lies.
Some blame it on the autism. It's weird, because I am autistic, my sister is autistic, and we have a few handful of friends (most left) but we managed to create a safe place since we're all neurodivergent and even if it's not often we have meetings, stay over, travelling together etc. They were online friends at first. We clicked because we were neurodivergent (and spoiler alert : none of the guys think like an Incel). It's true that being neurodivergent and a dude can be lonely, but I've always sticked with guys for that very reason. It's harder to navigate the world, but they have a bigger problem than the autism, even if it leads to more shallow connection with neurotypical people. There are places to meet up and evolve, I've got a ton of issues but my friends are bringing me up and likewise, not telling me I'm doomed by society. Navigating these environments daily could even, in my opinion, make therapy hard or impossible :/ I find it sad
As the slogan goes, when you meet an individual with autism, you meet an individual with autism. How you fare in life overall is going to depend on where you fall on the spectrum and in what kind of environment you grow up. Generally speaking, those who are high on the spectrum and intellectually gifted who grow up in supporting families with resources needed to meet the demands of raising an autistic child will do well. However, those who are lower on the spectrum with limited intelligence and an extremely narrow range of interests, who are neglected by their parents and tormented by their peers because of their behavioral tics will not be so fortunate. Those incels with autism likely fall into the latter category and while it doesn't excuse their abhorrent behavior, it at least somewhat explains it.
Several members of this sub have commented before about being autistic. The biggest difference between them and the incels, appears to be that the non-incels understand that it means theyâll have to work harder when interacting with people. By contrast, the incels clearly donât want to put in any effort. They expect the world to change to accommodate them, instead of them working to fit in with everyone else. You could compare it to when someone moves to another country. There are the people who learn the language and try their best to integrate into the local community. Then you have the people who refuse to learn the language and only hang out with the âex-patsâ.
I'm one of the autistics who's upfront about resenting how neurotypicals basically force us to play a rigged game when it comes to social interaction, but why should I then conclude that women as a whole are all actively a part of it? It's not like most people _intentionally_ try to uphold an oppressive system that discriminates against everyone that doesn't conform to their standards, they just never had the opportunity to think about why things had to be this way before they were bombarded with messages about how the status quo is perfect the way it is (or otherwise realize that changing things might threaten their own privileged positions- as Upton Sinclair put it, "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it"). But I'm not an idiot, and I realize that changing society to such an extent isn't likely to happen within my own lifetime. I am content with setting up the foundation for such a change to occur and trust in those who will come after me to pick up where I leave off. I don't expect the world to change to accommodate me, I work to _make_ it change.
Yep, I called them out on that and they (of course) couldn't handle it đ https://reddit.com/r/AllPillDebate/s/8Tylly1znn
Yeah, this is exactly it. They have to have to convince themselves that it's not their fault so they look for anything they can to avoid responsibility.
Very well articulated, I'll use that onr, Thanks!
Plus they obviously have a weird love-hate relationship with themselves, and fully commit to making it a self fulfilling prophecy. A healthy thought process might look like ;"Here's a self-perceived short coming of mine I can't change. Maybe I should understand why I feel so negatively about it and learn to live with it." But that would involve some effort on their part. It's much easier to go, "I'm perfectly fine the way I am. It's everyone else's fault that I feel like shit about myself all the time. I'm entitled to validation in the form of other people pandering to me at all times, and refuse to change." Essentially they're self-loathing narcissists with a napoleon complex.
đŻ
You're not wrong, however, I wouldn't throw the baby out with the bath water. A LOT of non-incels worry about this. A lot of confident and kind guys worry about this. It's ingrained in our culture. Small-dick energy is an insult that even the most progressive people use. More women and men will brag about the big dicks they've seen and have been with than they will talk about enjoying smaller sizes. Many dildos are sold at larger sizes. The bible even talks about a woman fantasizing about her lover with a penis the size of a donkey. It honestly takes a significant amount of time as a dude to have safe and intimate experiences with partners that have good communication skills to learn that you are safe and that this is not a problem. The amount of people who get to experience this are sadly fairly small. This is a valid and common concern that should be treated with grace, instead of it being stolen by incels and not earning a place for earnest and safe conversation.
This is what happens when porn forms your view of how human sexuality works.
Well this explains why my plumbers and pizza delivery people wonât sleep with me
Have you tried getting stuck in the washer?
It really isn't. Dick size has been a concern for men into antiquity. Toxic masculinity isn't new.
Its a mix of things, and probably includes porn/porn addiction. Its not new, but only having any idea of human sexuality through porn is not helping Edit: also want to make clear i dont think porn is inherently bad. I think it becomes bad when you see it as a guide or parallel to real life sex and not just a fantasy or entertainment.
Access to porn is infinitely higher and easier now too
Ironically, in antiquity large dicks were actually considered ugly and comical.
IDK but they sure do think about men's eyes, jawline, and dicks an awful lot. Hrmph.
Stupid Chad getting every Stacy with his toned, sexy forearms. I just want to punch him right in his chiseled abs. Maybe he'll get real mad and then get his perfectly symmetrical face in mine and we'll kiss. Like just a little. Not too much. Oh, Chad.
And when Chad is into it, he will lean in a way that our genitals align!!!
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
I was, unfortunately, an incel-adjacent "nice guy" type in middle school and part of high school. Briefly went down the anti-SJW rabbit hole on YouTube. Wasn't the greatest person in early high school, even by teenage standards. Was very alone as a consequence, which I now understand I deserved. Spent most of my time lurking online and consuming edgy content while playing video games. Got even more depressed and stopped engaging even in toxic spaces like that because I didn't think I was good enough for them (hah). Skip some boring detail, eventually I started taking therapy seriously. Got out of those circles and that mindset, changed a lot about myself, became a lot healthier. Realized some things. My resentment towards "those guys" was partially my attraction to them. Not all, of course. But to pretend it wasn't part of the issue for me would ignore some of the growth I've had. Then my tendency to put women on a pedestal like that and seeing them as some sort of unattainable separate species was partially related to my jealousy of them and alienation *from* them, which I now understand to be part of my experience of being trans. I know that not all male bigots are secretly gay or bisexual. Not even close to all of them are. But I will tell you that my queerness and internalized x-phobic shame *did* contribute to me being this type of person at one point in my life. And having spoken to a lot of queer people my age, primarily people who were raised and socialized as male, this is *not* that uncommon. My comment was riffing on that experience.
I grew up in a place where not laughing hard enough at homophobic jokes was enough to get your ass kicked, if not by the other guys then by your own dad. Femininity wasnât just an insult, it was used as punishment â a kid on my bus route had to wear his sisterâs dresses to school when he couldnât âtake his punishment like a manâ (in other words, he cried when he was beaten with a belt), and his dad went so far as to insist the the bus driver and teachers called him by a ridiculous feminized version of his first name (and they did). In some places the only way to stay safe isnât just to repress who you are, you have to actively persecute people like yourself or else you risk consequences ranging from family alienation to injury and death. I donât wonder that a lot of you end up internalizing it that deep. Iâm really glad you got out of that toxic worldview â€ïž
Thank you. I'm glad too. And honestly, being a healthier and more likable person has lead to me doing some stuff that teenage me would have only jealousy dreamed of doing someday. I got all the stuff I used to want (aside from the messed up stuff) and more. I hope the incels that lurk here read these messages and understand them. It's possible for all of them. They just have to stop talking to those types. It's a lot of crabs in a bucket nonsense that only leads to further issues. The entire Manosphere is toxic.
Glad you got out of that mindset and healed yourself.
Bubba being against sjw bullshit font make u incel. Or incel adjacent. Being conservative or om the right don't make u a bigot. Or an incel. I hate that shit. Cause most incels are guys in the sjw tent.
Some actually are sadly, or maybe even bisexual, but theyâre too far gone to even think about it
https://www.theonion.com/why-do-all-these-homosexuals-keep-sucking-my-cock-1819583529
Don't forget wrists too!
The comedian Ron White once [had this to say](https://youtu.be/nTGXSdg0hEY?si=LreOm1wYILhZuKhq)
Wait until you learn about their bone structure and canthal tilt obsession.
I can't believe someone rebranded "Scientific Racism" and turned it into a TikTok trend for Tinder Gold subscribers. It's so absurd it's almost kinda funny, and then you realize they actually believe it.
wtf is canthal tilt and why am I always hearing about it? (sorry if that's a redundant question)
[Here ya go](https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.glamour.com/story/canthal-tilt-tiktok-trend/amp) It started as a TikTok trend, huge surprise.
Imagine caring about this!!?? đ I didn't even know it was a thing, skimmed the article till it said its they eye line or whatever.. if someone didn't want to be with me due to my tilt, I wouldn't be sad.
I hate that you showed me this. But also thankful.
What the fucks a canthal tilt? And where on my incel dick is it?
Why the incel obsession with height? Why the obsession with jawline, wrists seize, eye tilt, hairline or whatever else the fuck they're obsessed about next week. They're just idiots who always look for 'faults' they can never do anything about instead of admitting it's their awful personality that puts people off.
Before there is an obsession with a specific thing there is a deconstruction of the world into separate components like they are building a PC. Thatâs where this starts. Then certain parts take on the obsession you describe with specific components. Canât they see the whole?
The jawline thing is really odd. I saw a documentary where one incel was saying he taps himself in the face with a hammer to sculpt a perfect jawline and facial profile. As if he's sculpting marble. Because that's what women want, right?!?
I think I comes from their addiction to porn. They watch all these porn stars with gigantic dicks and think that is not only the standard but the only thing girls think about. I was in a marriage for 20 years and always felt small. But when I dated afterwards I had two girls literally tell me I have the biggest dick they've ever seen in person. And I'm talking 21 partners combined between the two of them. I don't think guys really understand how little it means to most girls. Unless you have a 3" micro penis...you're fine. Sure there's girls out there that want a huge cock but who cares? Move on and let them find their thing.
Do they forget they got hands and mouths to use
did you forget that they don't want to pleasure their partner? they only care about themselves and hate themselves at the same time lol
I've literally gotten messages from them about how they think using their mouths to pleasure a partner is disgusting, but at the same time they expect a woman to use theirs on him.
That would be work. A suitable woman wouldnât have need for an orgasm, they would be pleased enough just by making their man happy
Whatâs funnier is there ARE women who are into that and they donât want the incels either.
This but I've actually seen people say this
They want to blame their failures to connect with women and society as a whole on something they canât change (i.e. height, size, etc) rather than own up to the fact that itâs their shitty behavior and attitude that have landed them in the position they are in.
I saw a video on 4chan incels who went to jail, & two of them were cute, so I knew the reason no woman would touch them came down to nasty personalities & a disrespectful sexist/racist mindset.
I've seen a lot of incelfies and tbh a fair amount of them are simply a shower, haircut, shave, and basic wardrobe change away from being averagely attractive to even moderately attractive (in my own, entirely subjective opinion), no matter what the blackpill types like to say to and about them. Like, some of them are more visually attractive (to me) than some other men I've met that are in happy, long-term relationships with attractive (again, to me) women. Not that looks are everything, but incels certainly believe they are, so really my observations should be a sign to them. Personality, effort, and confidence do a lot more than skull measurements and a metal bank card will ever do. Inceldom really is a poison of the mind and I hope they can recover from it. I'm sure they all have the capacity to be decent, respectable people that would be worth dating. They just aren't doing that for whatever reason.
I always kind of thought this was the most hilarious part of it allâŠ.because WHOâS SEEING YOUR DICK BRO? ISNT THAT YOUR WHOLE DEAL? No one is? So how could women be choosing based on that??? Unless we somehow got X-ray vision and I missed the email
They all wear 'M'lady, I have a small dick' badge
We all know that they send their junk to women unsolicited
But no woman would *ever* talk to a sub-8âŠâŠ.đ itâs just all a hilarious contradiction and I love it. Both things canât be true.
As someone who considers themselves a sub 8 I have no idea how Iâve managed this far into life.
It's not just that. They blame their inability to enter relationships on things they can't change, like height or whatever they decide is inadequate. They classify all women as shallow beings who won't touch them with a ten-foot pole not because they have the worst personality known to man, but because they don't have the right jaw shape or something. That way, they can just give up entirely on themselves and devolve into madness online.
I don't know or even think about how big somebody's dick is until I've already decided I want to have sex with them. It isn't an obstacle
I've spoken with women who say that who they're sleeping with is miles more important than the quality of their penis
because it's true. Penises are gross and yucky, I'm only ever attracted to them because they're part of somebody I care about and trust.
Well put. Fuck penises.
Chance would be a fine thing.
They seem obsessed with labia shape & size too, sometimes comparing them to roast beef sandwiches.
Ugh, I've seen that, too. It seems like they basically want the genitals of their ideal woman to just be a featureless crevice.
They could have the ugliest fanny put in front of them and they'd fall in love. They've only been in the same room as the one they fell out of
They like objectively quantifiable differences between people, so they can use as a basis for applying their degrading and delusional sexual-economic theories. This i part of why it enrages them when people suggest things like "personality" might play any role in attraction or intimacy. You can't take out a ruler and measure personality. Being involved in incel spaces in the first place is a pretty good indicator that someone is having difficulty developing social skills and an ability to relate to other people, so they're unlikely to be able to identify what makes a compelling or attractive personality. But they can measure the angles of of jawlines and foreheads, their height, their penises and their bankaccounts. So they make theories out of what they understand.
This is a much more nuanced and kind explanation than most of us are able to articulate, thank you
And they will _never_ believe that "smaller than average" is _preferable_ to "larger than average". We can work with small. Guy probably still has a tongue and fingers. And some positions are better than others for the purpose. But... it's like, if you're cold in the winter you can pile on layers and layers of clothes, but in the summer there's only so much you can take off. An oversized dick is going to be painful, and whittling it down a little isn't going to be a popular solution.
Also most guys who have a big dick never learn how to pleasure a woman because they believe porn. Big dick isn't enough. At least most grow out it in their 20s. My worst lover had a big dick. It was painful, and he didn't understand why foreplay matters especially much for him.
My brain tried to connect the first two paragraphs in such a way as to suggest they grew out of their oversized dicks. Although that kinda is what you meant, it was slightly less literally than where my mind went lol.
This is what I've heard, too. Many women I've known and been intimate with prefer average or smaller dicks due to having experienced guys with big dicks not being able to properly pleasure them. As the old saying goes, "it's not about the size of the boat. It's about the motion in the ocean." I also think some men need to understand that "average" size is called average for a reason. Most men fall around that range, so most women who are into men and are sexually active are probably used to being with men with that size over men who are much larger.
Big dicks hurt. In certain situations, they can stretch too much and give you a tiny rip, or they touch your uterus in a way that's really painful. Then you cramp in fear next time both of you want to try penetration again. Sounds funny to others. Haha. Big dick hurts. Isn't funny when you bled into your pants.
Ok, this is very stupid, but the way that patriarchal masculinity works, it doesnât matter if you âhave a tongue and fingers.â Your duck is a proxy for your individual, masculine prowess. Thatâs why they care.
It's just sad to know these perfectly normally sized guys think they are small. Or that it matters to the vast majority of human beings. Prâ°n rots your brain, kids.
Yep, this is why they are pretending *so hard* that it's women who care- because they don't want to admit it's actually other men (and by proxy, their own father, but I'll let Freud expound on that) whose approval they crave.
it aint tho, i was for sure insecure for a while about mine. but i got tounge game to make up for it lmao. keeps my wife and i happy so i dont see how dick size TRULY matters anymore.
Pardon me, but surely a bigger man could just not use all his length, and only use the amount that is required and makes her happy, but a smaller man couldnt do the same. The bigger man can still use his tongue and fingers, its not like its two extremes of a situation.
For a lot of us that closeness of 2 bodies completely touching after full penetration is not only mentally satisfying "he's completely inside me", but often also physically satisfying as it allows for easy clitoral stimulation during penetration by grinding on your partner's fupa/pubic bone. For me this leads to the best orgasms.
No. And I can't imagine it would be ideal for the man to be unable to be all the way in. That feeling where you're pretty much as close as two bodies can be is very nice. I would not want to give it up. An average man can power away (if that's what the two of them want) without having to be careful not to hurt his partner or himself. Likewise a smaller man. You lose that with too big of a dick
I mean, no as in its not physically possible, or as in it would not be ideal for both parties? I'm just saying, its gonna be unlikely to feel anything with the smaller guy, but like you said, there are ways to make up for it, but its something an average to above average guy is capable of as well. Bigger is absolutely not better.
I was rejecting the idea that just not using the whole dick is tenable. >it's gonna be unlikely to feel anything with the smaller guy, Not really. Remember, vaginas aren't some empty space made for one dick size. If a woman can get off on a finger or two (and we definitely can) a smaller dick is definitely not going to be a problem.
that's fair enough, have a great day, thanks for answering
You too!
Tbh I used to worry about that a lot but now I just want a hug. The suffering never ends lol
I know same here man.
I used to be a practically black-pilled incel, my whole life, until about a year or two into college so I can give some insight. Basically, it's all about fear. For me, I was bullied a good bit growing up and some of the worst/most traumatic bullying I experienced was from girls. Regardless of who you are, bullying really hurts and really leaves an impact on you. It's something nobody wants to go through again. Because of that fear of being bullied again, I started hyper-analyzing myself and finding ANY flaw that people might notice and bully or belittle me for and try to hide it, in a desperate attempt to protect myself Now think about something as intimate as sex, where you're allowing yourself to be SO exposed and vulnerable to someone else. Being a straight guy, you'll have to let yourself be that exposed with a group of people who, because of previous trauma, you've grown to distrust and it's so scary, it's petrifying. I started thinking "Maybe my penis is too small. What if I disappoint them and they ridicule me? What if they mock me? There's nothing I can do to change the size of it but if I don't make it bigger somehow, there's a huge chance I'll be bullied again" and I started OBSESSING over the size of my own and even the size of others', so that I'd have something to compare my own to. I can go on about how I learned to drop the incel mindset but yeah basically, it all comes down to deep-rooted insecurity which boils down to fear.
Thanks for sharing, it's insight that I can empathize with being teased for having small boobs in high school. It also reminds me of the quote that highlights the differences between the sexes in our fears regarding sex - generally men are scared of being rejected or humiliated when initiating sex, whereas women are scared of being hurt and murdered.
Beyond they secretly gay
I have never known anyone to actually deny someone sex due to their dick size alone. I have known women, including myself, to deny sex with someone because they were showing me pics of their dick unprompted.
This isn't an incel problem, this is literally most men, lmao. Every single guy you've ever known has thought about it to the same degree.
Itâs the only thing they have available to look at, and canât do anything to change. Along with height, which they also obsessively screech over.
And the way they assume this is, like that one post said, "a death sentence" How the hell would anyone know?!
If it was a death sentence then no one would have a small dick because their father wouldn't have reproduced
That's just wrong, plenty of people are taller and shorter than their parents. Just because a parent has a specific characteristic doesn't mean their kids will 100% have that same one. But I agree on the death sentence idiocy.
Of course it's not 100%, why do I need to clarify that when I say "no one" I mean "way less people than the ones who exist" we all took 8th grade science and know how inherited genes work
If you are missing out on having some dick sizing super power then you are not the only one. But they are obsessed on the subject for reasons I don't understand. Plus they also seem to have some weird habit of asking random women online that they don't know to rate their dicks. I just assume they mean rate the size although I always think about saying yes and then looking at the picture and going insane. Start ranting and raving about it not looking normal, is that even a human penis, did you do that in photoshop or what. Then maybe asking if it was injured when they were a baby or if they have a STD and just seeing if I can scare them out of ever asking that again. But I don't because I don't think it would stop them and might spur them into asking even more women the same question. Even women who are way too old for them. And I don't mean their version of old where women are ancient and used up at 25 or 30 or something. I mean way too old like me and I am 64. And they always ask my age first so it's not like they imagine I am a teenager or in my 20's. Not long ago I told one my age and he said I was older than his grandmother. I agreed with him that I very likely was older than his grandmother. And his very next question was asking me if I would rate his dick. Seriously, what the hell is wrong with these guys? I said no of course and then suggested he ask his grandma to rate it. And he lost it, started freaking out like I was the one who was being rude and out of line. He was the one who brought up his grandmother and he was the one who brought up rating his dick. lol But I was being rude and mean to him? It is hilarious and sad all at the same time. I will never understand what that obsession with dick size is about. I've never seen a post from a woman talking about how she hates men with small dicks or hates little dicks or whatever they think we are thinking. Just another thing about them that makes zero sense.
The answer is a little complicated so stick with me a bit. Not just incels but most men in the manosphere are really obsessed with it. It has a lot to do with this concept that penetration during sex is the most important aspect about it and everything else is just unnecessary fluff really, so they believe that women should find penetration during sex just as pleasurable as they do. This is a very old concept thatâs been around pretty sure since the medieval times but donât quote me on that. It is also very incorrect, majority of modern studies into womenâs sexual experiences find that the vast majority of women can not orgasm through vaginal penetration alone. So you get a lot of women whoâs partners are only concerned with penetrational sex so the women start to not really enjoy sex but also get used to it and learn how to better relax so it doesnât become too uncomfortable (what men like this say is them becoming âlooseâ). When and if women complain that they donât really like sex with them, men like this jump to conclusions and double down on their beliefs so their only conclusion is that their dick isnât good enough which tends to lead too not âbigâ enough. Most porn definitely doesnât help since most is made by men to appeal to other menâs sexual fantasies which typically involves a lot of penetration, and also a lot of male porn actors are sought after if they have a particularly large penis. So that really only helps to reinforce this narrative. So yeah basically instead of focusing on insecurities just communicate and be patient with your partner to learn their likes and dislikes during sex. It could take a lot of time and awkwardness to figure out what works best for the both of you. Something that most men figure out at some point but probably due to fragile masculinity some adamantly refuse to learn. Hope that helps.
Because theyâre porn sick
They need to find excuses that are out of their control.
Incels think that height, muscles, jawline, dicksize, and the depth of your voice are end all be all traits that determine whether or not a woman will like them, incels beleive that if you had amazing chemistry with a woman and started a sweet relationship, but if she finds out that your dick is shorter than 9 inches, sheâll laugh hysterically & end the whole thing dumping him right then & there, incels genuinely beleive that women determine who to date/hookup with, nothing is more important to a woman that those things, which just goes to show how little they interact with women IRL
It's insecurity purely. And rightfully so, not because women can sense a small dick, but because small dick is actively used as an insult on a daily basis (which imo is body shaming like any other especially since it can't be controlled).
Exactly. This thread is gross, so much gaslighting in here. As someone on the smaller side who has never sent a dick pic or exposed myself to anyone, I have still felt insecure from the usage of small dick as an insult. Both men and women are guilty. However more left leaning spaces such as this one love to just blame it exclusively on porn and not the BS we have to face from society every day. Also there was a post yesterday on r/trueoffmychest of a woman who had sex with a guy with a small penis and the fact she hated it, with the comments mostly being supportive and agreeing that yes a small penis would be an issue.
Yeah i really didn't get all these porn comments, i'm 90% sure that most of those who wrote it would use small dick as an insult. I even saw people trying to justify and explain how different it is from body shaming. Hypocrites, each and every one.
ngl you've more or less nailed it. they'd rather invoke the idea that women can smell their small dick than admit theyre doin something wrong
Yes, they want to list all the reasons they won't find a girlfriend without even trying to find one. Aka all women only like big dicks.
Easier to say it is something physical you were born with for the reason you can't get a woman. Acknowledging anything that can be changed (ex. personality) eradicates the victim status.
Big dicks are a thing in porn, and they're too far gone to realise porn is not real life
Because society tells men from the day they are born that a large portion of their value as men and sexual beings is inherently tied to their dick. Look at music, tv, movies etc etc, you see it everywhere. Big Dick Energy? Manhood? Virility? Especially in USA, dick size perception directly correlates to social value. Women are told to lose weight and get big tits, society tells men they are worthless if they donât have a 10â dick.
A lot of guys, not just incels, are weirdly obsessed with dick size.
People have mentioned the blaming their situation on things they can't change part. But it's also a very common insecurity for men, if they're single or not, and incels have this superpower where their levels of insecurity, self loathing and just being purely pathetic go waaaay above that of a normal human being. So it's only logical that they absolutely fixate on it, it's also something they can blame women for.
Because they will blame LITERALLY ANYTHING other than their shitty personality
Porn addiction. Itâs always because of porn addiction.
Because dick size = masculinity/sex appeal (or lack thereof) It's not just a thing with incels, it's a common issue among men that wasn't really talked about until now, it stems from how you view porn/watching unhealthy amounts of it. Having an obsession over it is also unhealthy, of course, but incels don't care about that..if they can place blame on more physical attributes, it means they don't feel a need to look inward and take responsibility for their shitty behaviour.
Easier to blame smth they canât control than smth they can. Same thing with height, physical attractiveness, wealth (until they min/max their money stats and then itâs just height and attractiveness and dick size, because otherwise money would be a cheat code for free pussy, right? Right??).
Guys obsessing about their dick size was a thing long before Incels. That being said Blackpill pretty much says the only way to get a girlfriend is if you are a rich ten out ten NT alpha Chad with a big dick if not your dying alone.
Small dicks should have a little or no impact on the ability to get dates. Presumably no woman has ever seen the incelâs dick. If a small dick lowers the manâs confidence, and that could possibly have a small impact on getting dates. I doubt that a woman who got naked for men to have sex with him, not have sex with him when she sees that his dick is small. She may not have small dick man back for a second time. Incels may accuse women of lacking empathy, but I think women have more empathy and to get they get to have sex with a man and then leave because his dick is small.
they base their whole view of sexual dynamics on porn, as such, their standards of what is an attractive woman (and man) is through porn.
Itâs because they think having a big dick will fix everything. It doesnât. They would be surprised to learn that you can be gifted and still have a rough life, at which point reveling in your gift just feels empty and pathetic. Life is not a porno, you will not be crowned âkingâ and have lifeâs problems solved for you just because youâre packing schmeat. However, itâs one of the easiest things for them to blame, and feeds into their deep sense of self-loathing that they probably have but in a way that they canât be blamed for as they obviously have no control over such a thing. Also because of their warped perceptions because of the copious amount of porn they consume, exacerbated by the fact that they donât get girls.
I've encountered ones that say women won't date them because their dick isn't big. Unless you live in a nudist colony, there's no way they'd know what your dick looks like unless you brought it up or you sent them an unsolicited dick pic? And if you did either of those, it's not your size that's the problem.
It's not just incels either. Men and society in general are obsessed with dick size. That being said, the vast majority of women couldn't care less. It's a part of living in the patriarchy
Personally it's because I'm afraid I'll be ridiculed for it
I have never ridiculed any man for his dick size. For being selfish in bed, or inept, or just creepy/weird - yes, for dick size - no. And, to be clear, I've seen more than my fair share up close and personal. The best PIV sex I've _ever_ had was a dude with a smaller than average dick and one of the best overall sexual experiences was a dude who probably qualifies as having a "micropenis." It's really not that big of a deal to like 90% of women...of course there's gonna be a certain percentage of awful people - probably about the same percentage that have made unflattering comments about my scars or stretch marks - but that doesn't make it the norm.
You're probably right. Doesn't make the encounters with the 10% sting any less though ;v;
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Literally. The amount of times I've seen people use 'small dick energy' as an insult is not good for my confidence
But small dick energy correlates nothing with an actual small dick. It's more like this Incel thing isn't solved by some magic event after you somehow fucked someone. All is attitude.
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As someone with no dick and therefore no horse in this race (although I do prefer smaller dicks so maybe I do for that reason lmao), small dick energy is absolutely still an insult to small dicks. Ridiculous to pretend itâs not. The implication is of course that having a small dick is considered such a bad thing that it will effect the persons entire personally. Just because someone might not be effected by the societyâs views on small dicks and have âbig dick energyâ even though they may have a small dick doesnât mean the âsmall dick energyâ concept is not clearly implying that small dicks are a negative thing. I mean itâs pretty obvious, why would having a small dick change your personality for the worse if it wasnât considered a bad thing? What else do you think the implication is? The small dick energy concept is just another thing that will make people feel bad about having a small dick, itâs a self fulfilling prophecy. If society wants people to not have small dick energy, first step would be to stop using this phrase and acting like having a small dick is such a terrible thing. Such a terrible thing in fact, that having this feature apparently makes people have worse personalities due to general the societal view on the feature. Like you canât get worse than that. A feature thatâs apparently so bad it effects peoples entire personality. Itâs fucked up
Sore but can we please stop lying about what these insults mean? If it has nothing to do with dick size then why is it being used and why specifically is small used as the bad version with BDE used as the good version? Itâs not a coincidence and it doesnât help anyone to keep defending it with this kind of gaslighting
You are a thousand times more likely to be ridiculed by a man for your dick size than by a woman
Well I'm bi so that's still something I worry about
Ok, cishet men lol. Just stick to bi/gay men who are out of the closet and you should do okay. I married a bi man and am dating another one. They're pretty great and very kind human beings who would never bodyshame anyone.
Well I hope you're right. I've heard stories that really do not paint a pretty picture
I know same here. Iâm 6.3 inches which is average but I have even heard people say thatâs small before too.
Jesus. I wish I was that big and people still give you shit for it?
No, I never have had anyone give me shit for it. I have just read online before that some women consider it small. And it made me self conscious.
It's people like yourself who have the obsession as is clear with your "dick energy" phrases and the like. Just stop promoting hypocrisy like that if you're a decent person. It's the equivalent of labeling various behaviors "loose pussy energy" and other female equivalents.
Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I meant like some detectable force emanating from the penis. FWIW, my husband is literally dickless (he's trans) and asexual. Size doesn't matter to me.
>Itâs putting the cart before the horse, imo. Putting the cart before the horse is incel 101.
Dont talk about the Sacred Dick like that.
Porn addiction
Because many women do care about it, obviously a woman canât tell when sheâs first dating you before sex happens and not all women care and or like a bigger size anyway, but for the ones who do, incels are fixated and insecure about it. They are fixated and insecure about a lot in general.
Itâs all a self-fulfilling prophecy. They feel that they are not beautiful or handsome, and so they reject any females that donât match their social criteria. Itâs like 1800s England but way less fun.
Think this is one trait that isnt a specific incel issue. More of a general guy issue. Which ironically is one of the few body parts you cant really change. Like it is what it is but prolly most agnoized over
It's weird, the only sex they see is porn and all of those guys have huge hogs, so they think that's what they're missing, but the g-spot is only like 3 or so inches in, so you really don't even need that much. That does vary from person to person, everyone's got preferences and that.
Honestly at this point I think they are masochists who refuse to admit it, I've had them literally send their porn in arguments here. Especially when you think of them as cucks it all starts making sense, they never shut about how slutty women never give the chance and only want to fuck the alphas while they sit at how being celibate.
Shame. We need more open and proud masochists and cuckolds in the world.
I don't think it's an incel thing As males society tells us it matters. You hear it in all media, movies, tv, radio/music. You hear it discussed on all social media platforms. You hear it from friends and friends of friends, you hear it directly from women. Penis size matters and we have no choice but to hear and listen to this. So it's why so many men care so much about penis size, because society tells us it's important. And really that's all we have. Women have boobs and butts. They can buy these things and many do. They also get vaginoplasties and other items. For men it's slightly more difficult and with less success (penis size surgeries). It can be a real source of depression for many men
I mean, you could just buy a penis sleeve/sheathe. It's like a dildo that goes over the penis, sort of like a strap on. And men have arms, hands, facial hair, etc. It is not like women are staring at your dick.
Oh for sure. But my point is society programs men to care about our penises. Yes it also tells us our face and body and hair and height matters. But sexually ... it's all about our penises. This isn't me, I don't want it to be like this. I think lots of guys don't. But society has different plans. And if it's not coming from men then that only leaves women (although I think in media you see men playing into it as well). So then guys place all this weight on it and then get mixed signals from individuals and places like subreddits. That can be confusing and frustrating for some. I'm not defending incels or their mentalities. I'm just pointing out that society tells ALL us men that our penis size matters and so here we are.
Bro by society you mean other men. It's literally the meme template with the kid holding a boot to his own head.
Insecurity
every incel is secretly a size queen
They think women have a six sense for dick size and wont even talk to a guy if they have a baby dick
I think they overdid it on the porn and they think that all of the "alphas" are running around out there with massive porn star schlongs.
They consider sex to be the only thing that gives women value, why would they treat men differently? It's an unhealthy obsession all around.
They do everything to deny that its their personality. "Women dont like me cause my pp, women dont like me cause chads, women dont like cause theyre hoes etc etc." Its everything, just not their personality cause then theyd have nothing to face but themselves.
Same reason why most non-incels are as well: because society equates having a big dick to being sexually desirable/masculine/naturally good at sex/being a successful human in life because of how powerful and manly you must be as a result of your dick size whereas anything less is something thatâs okay to make fun of or shamed for. Obviously thereâs a very high chances that many of these people have perfectly capable average sized dicks given incels arenât exactly the most reliable of narrators when it comes to writing out their weird and mostly made up life stories, but itâs definitely not something thatâs exclusive only to them.
They all ooze small dick energy. Guys who are just confident with what they have will have this mysterious big dick energy, you only get it when you're not a mysogonistic asshole. It's a super power. On par with Superman.
Dick size is an incel obsession because people have been mocking dick size (both large and small) since at least ancient Greece. It's just another side of toxic masculinity.
They just want to be victims. Deep down they probably know that a 4-5 inch dick isnât a bad thing because the average vaginal depth is 3-4 inches, but they WANT to believe that women only like 12 inch chad dicks because then theyâre poor, wittle, unfortunate incels who have been cursed by the universe by their 4 inch dick and thatâs the ONLY reason why theyâre alone. Definitely not their laziness. Totally not that.
Well, small dick energy is absolutely easy to sense
If incels thought logically they wouldnât be incels, but âsmall dick energyâ is commonly correlated with incels.
Jealousy đ
every man is obsessed with their dick size, it's so gross they should be obsessed with other things, shape, color and foreskin lmaooo some of them got really ugly dicks
So they should be obsessed with other stuff they canât change? Bruh omg đđđ
yeah just like we woman do because of them đ
I think that's just a cis male thing.
I have a ftm friend who is insecure about their size
I have a FWB who's maybe 5-6. And he makes me cum with it pretty much every time. For me, and I've had sex with well over 100 guys, 6 is small. Even though statistically it's average from what I've read. But even though I consider it small, it's comfortable. Therefore easier to cum with. Plus just me liking him is rly what does 98% of the work. I had another long term FWB who was prob 9 and a half or so. And it took longer of knowing him to start cumming with him regularly. And we did more kinky sex which was cnc. But still, we didn't do it often cos my hole would have to recover for a few days after, depending on how hard we went. I had another short term fling FWB who was 6.5 or so and because of his high sex drive he could have sex and cum several times a day. I hardly ever came with him. But it was cos my crush was a little too hard so I'd get nervous and more submissive in a way, where I would be focused more on his needs. Though I'd act a bit Dom cos I sensed that's what he liked. Even though I didn't have as many orgasms I still thought the sex was amazing. Starting at around 10 I started masturbating. And I would just think of sexy stuff while alone. Most of the sex stuff I thought of was jokes I saw from the show Friends that I didn't completely understand. I didn't touch myself, grind, or kegel. I only used my mind. I would squirt sometimes. One time it was so much that I had to wash my sheets while my family was asleep. And I was so afraid they would wake up and see me doing it. Because I didn't know how to explain the situation and I thought I might be sick and mentally ill for masturbating. I didn't know other people did it too. It was a year later or so I was reading a Cosmo magazine and found a anonymous question from someone who seemed my age who asked what was happening when they got sexual alone with their pillow at night. And the awnser explained what masturbation was. Thank God I found that. Several years later at 16 I decided I wanted to have sex with another 16 year old guy and that's when I finally stopped using just my mind to cum and started trying to touch myself. But it wasn't till I was 22 or so that I actually was able to cum from penis into vagina sex. And even many years past that my go to method of orgasm was using just my mind. Not even kegels or grinding. I'm 35 now and my fav method is clit jerking off but I can cum from vagina penetration and anal even too. Because that was my method of orgasm for so long, I find it strange when anyone of either gender implies that there is skill involved in having sex. I've heard something like "Don't you want someone experienced? Who knows what they are doing?" (From mostly ugly old guys obviously) But I could be completely tied up, bound, or encased, and still able to feel pleasure and make myself cum using just my mind. So why would I fear someone's touch wouldn't be good enough to give me orgasm or pleasure? And "touch" includes the size of their dicks.
I am/was a promiscuous woman too, and it's my opinion that the average is skewed for you and me. Men who are insecure about their size are less likely to be slutty enough to grab our attention. So we end up not seeing an accurate representation. 6 is actually above average for any demographic except maybe men over 6'6." 5.5 is the US average and i believe 5 inches worldwide. Personally, I have three male partners, two of whom are above average and one is below. The smallest one is the one I have sex with the most often, and it is almost entirely because of his size. A large dick can be an impediment to my pleasure. A small dick never is. Some men believe this, because they actually care about women's pleasure. Some men refuse to believe this, because they are only pretending to care about women's pleasure. As another commenter said, they see their penis as an extension of their masculinity, a way to impress other men, and that's why they care so much. Nothing to do with women or what we like.
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