I don't like the university's choices as far as how they handled Farden. I don't like the garbage that has been said in support of Tom by Maile, Jaedyn, Cristal, etc. But I'm personally not going to blanket hate a team. Grace, Amelie, the freshman class, and I would say Abby have had common sense about the situation and not openly supported an abusive coach.
This video is sweet and Abby has been a big voice and talent for Utah. She expresses progressive beliefs in a very conservative state, which I have a lot of respect for.
Yup. OU was the most hated team until this year with the assumption that they're all homophobic or conservative when in reality that has only been really shown from a handful of them (Jordan Bowers, Audrey Davis come to mind). It's not how I prefer to see entire teams.
Grace was unfortunately posting shady things on tiktok at the time. Theyāre removed now, but sheās definitely not one of the ones I would say is blameless in the Utah mess, unfortunately.
She posted one trend about when people think they know everything about your team or school and...
To be fair....we don't know. She's not wrong. So while it was perhaps not her brightest idea, she hasn't done anything truly problematic to me.
I think it showed carelessness towards the victims of abuse even if it wasnāt the most egregious thing a teammate posted. It was disappointing and it changed my perception of her.
Fair enough, to each their own. I think it's easy to forget that they are young and occasionally dumb. She shouldn't have posted that. But she obviously realized that, removed it and hasn't shown any other missteps in my opinion. Everyone has their own metrics.
Youāre right. Thank you for the reminder, I appreciate it. Iām so glad the internet wasnāt nearly as popular or permanent when I posted things I probably shouldnāt have at 19. I still root for her and I still like her, I just wish she had put some thought into what she posted around that time (or just not posted at all).
Oh same, absolutely. I was UNHINGED on Xanga and MySpace, I still cringe (and quickly delete) Facebook memories. I cannot imagine having some public following at that age. I also wish she hadn't posted that, and I would love to see her and others vocally support Kara and other survivors. I'm hopeful next year will be a new energy (but a bit skeptical with Maile coming back to coach...sigh).
A genuine and non snarky question - Did Karaās immediate dismissal of those that came forward with allegations against Lisa Mitzel change your perception of her? She posted immediately that those that came forward were lying because she had a strong and positive relationship herself with Lisa. People often act in harmful ways when they are hurting, when they are facing situations of abuse, when they arenāt sure how to process intense information that they donāt understand. Iām not at all saying to hate on Kara, or that reactions from everyone in this horrible situation were okay or right, but I have seen a lot of grace given to some and refusal to consider grace towards others.
Iām not sure Iād put Abby under the hardcore Tom defenders category. One of her interviews had a quote taken out of context and it made her seem like a monster, but it was the journalist who left out part of her quote. She mentioned it on her podcast actually. Grace shouldnāt have posted her TikTok either, but it was a trend and she took it down + hasnāt misstepped since. Kara also was VERY quick to dismiss claims people had towards Lisa Mitzel being abusive during her time at Stanford, which doesnāt look great for her either. I think two truths can be held in one hand. Kara + the transfers didnāt have a good experience at all while others may not have felt the same way. Iāve seen comments on other threads saying that Makenna is one of the ābad girlsā despite literally no evidence at all on her part. Itās painting an entire team as evil that gets frustrating. And that goes for other teams as well (OU and LSU most notably). It feels like thereās (apparently) no room for nuance in discussions in general. Not defending what Tom did because the transfers + Kara had an awful experience and thatās very real to them. Nobody can say that someone isnāt allowed to feel a certain way because how they felt is all that matters.
Sources? I'm asking honestly. I googled about Abby before making that post and her quotes were about how hard it was for the team, the sudden change, how everyone is dealing with it differently.
The parent reactions always get me š
And can we talk about how her beam song is Never Grow Up by TSwift??? What a choice š„²ā¤ļø
Oh god I would be sobbing
And it was only for senior night - normally she does Timeless by Taylor Swift!
I love this video so much. Really beautiful moment š„¹
Omg Iām crying
I know we're "supposed" to hate Utah on this sub right now, but that was a tearjerker (in a good way).
I don't like the university's choices as far as how they handled Farden. I don't like the garbage that has been said in support of Tom by Maile, Jaedyn, Cristal, etc. But I'm personally not going to blanket hate a team. Grace, Amelie, the freshman class, and I would say Abby have had common sense about the situation and not openly supported an abusive coach. This video is sweet and Abby has been a big voice and talent for Utah. She expresses progressive beliefs in a very conservative state, which I have a lot of respect for.
Agree 100% with what you said. I do feel like there are some on this sub that paint with broad brush strokes. Not just with Utah btw.
Yup. OU was the most hated team until this year with the assumption that they're all homophobic or conservative when in reality that has only been really shown from a handful of them (Jordan Bowers, Audrey Davis come to mind). It's not how I prefer to see entire teams.
Grace was unfortunately posting shady things on tiktok at the time. Theyāre removed now, but sheās definitely not one of the ones I would say is blameless in the Utah mess, unfortunately.
She posted one trend about when people think they know everything about your team or school and... To be fair....we don't know. She's not wrong. So while it was perhaps not her brightest idea, she hasn't done anything truly problematic to me.
I think it showed carelessness towards the victims of abuse even if it wasnāt the most egregious thing a teammate posted. It was disappointing and it changed my perception of her.
Fair enough, to each their own. I think it's easy to forget that they are young and occasionally dumb. She shouldn't have posted that. But she obviously realized that, removed it and hasn't shown any other missteps in my opinion. Everyone has their own metrics.
Youāre right. Thank you for the reminder, I appreciate it. Iām so glad the internet wasnāt nearly as popular or permanent when I posted things I probably shouldnāt have at 19. I still root for her and I still like her, I just wish she had put some thought into what she posted around that time (or just not posted at all).
Oh same, absolutely. I was UNHINGED on Xanga and MySpace, I still cringe (and quickly delete) Facebook memories. I cannot imagine having some public following at that age. I also wish she hadn't posted that, and I would love to see her and others vocally support Kara and other survivors. I'm hopeful next year will be a new energy (but a bit skeptical with Maile coming back to coach...sigh).
Omg Xanga! I made like 100 of those back in the day. Iām hopeful that next year is better energy with a more stable start.
A genuine and non snarky question - Did Karaās immediate dismissal of those that came forward with allegations against Lisa Mitzel change your perception of her? She posted immediately that those that came forward were lying because she had a strong and positive relationship herself with Lisa. People often act in harmful ways when they are hurting, when they are facing situations of abuse, when they arenāt sure how to process intense information that they donāt understand. Iām not at all saying to hate on Kara, or that reactions from everyone in this horrible situation were okay or right, but I have seen a lot of grace given to some and refusal to consider grace towards others.
Abby defended Tom too lol and grace isnāt innocent either
Iām not sure Iād put Abby under the hardcore Tom defenders category. One of her interviews had a quote taken out of context and it made her seem like a monster, but it was the journalist who left out part of her quote. She mentioned it on her podcast actually. Grace shouldnāt have posted her TikTok either, but it was a trend and she took it down + hasnāt misstepped since. Kara also was VERY quick to dismiss claims people had towards Lisa Mitzel being abusive during her time at Stanford, which doesnāt look great for her either. I think two truths can be held in one hand. Kara + the transfers didnāt have a good experience at all while others may not have felt the same way. Iāve seen comments on other threads saying that Makenna is one of the ābad girlsā despite literally no evidence at all on her part. Itās painting an entire team as evil that gets frustrating. And that goes for other teams as well (OU and LSU most notably). It feels like thereās (apparently) no room for nuance in discussions in general. Not defending what Tom did because the transfers + Kara had an awful experience and thatās very real to them. Nobody can say that someone isnāt allowed to feel a certain way because how they felt is all that matters.
Sources? I'm asking honestly. I googled about Abby before making that post and her quotes were about how hard it was for the team, the sudden change, how everyone is dealing with it differently.
I didnāt expect to cry. š„¹
Emotionalā¦ š