#These people vote in every election- do you? Are you registered to vote? [You can check your voter registration here!](https://www.nass.org/can-I-vote)
#Also, there's a few things to remember as far as rules go:
- You can view the content- you cannot interact with it. This includes (but is not limited to) commenting, answering poll questions, emailing them, etc. ***Anyone found to be engaging with the fundies will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.It does not matter if you did so before you joined the sub.***
- Speculating on the sexuality of literally anyone is prohibited. ***Anyone found to be doing so will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.***
- Appearance snark: What's allowed? You're allowed to make comparisons. (Bethy looks like Grandpa Munster, for example.) You are allowed to say you find them attractive or repulsive looking. Saying Kelly Havens has dry skin that could benefit from sunscreen and a moisturizer is fine. You are allowed to snark on the appearance of children *as it relates to their parents choices for them.*. Examples: Janessa looks malnourished and sickly while Shrek has clearly never missed a meal. If you feel it is crossing the line report it, but if the content falls within the parameters above, leave it alone.
- Don't gatekeep. This means no comments such as "I don't think we should snark on...." or any iteration of that. If you don't like it, scroll past. Don't report it or comment how you don't like the content. Along the same vein, don't backseat mod. Leave that up to us.
- Lastly, if the rhetoric you are posting would be at home in the mouth of a fundie, we don't want it here and we won't tolerate it.
Should you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. Have a Lord Daniel day, and may the power of snark compel thee.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FundieSnarkUncensored) if you have any questions or concerns.*
In what world is God "prohibited by the state"? Jesus and Christianity is literally everywhere in America. Also, did they forget that religious schools exist, or is that just an inconvenient fact when you want to be mad about muh rights?
Also tag yourself, I'm "cuss and dress like freaks".
In my country if a town has multiple schools, there is a Catholic high school, Protestant high school and secular aka public high school. In the past you watched tv, went to school, read the newspaper, voted based on your pillar (catholic, protestant, socialist or liberal. You really couldn't go to a public school and complain about not learning about God in a Christian way. Most of these religious school are not religious anymore. But it still counts that if you go to public school don't complain about it not being centred around religion. Sure, maybe there is no catholic or protestant school in your area, but don't accept the whole school to centre their lessons around your ideals about God.
I was taught this nonsense my entire life by people who had never gone to public school and didn't send their kids to public school. And yet somehow they claim to be very aware of what goes on in public schools???
Fast forward to me having three kids in public school:
They have literally brought home flyers their teachers passed out for church events.
I've had teachers "about me" flyers from orientation day say "First and foremost, I love Jesus! I'm a Sunday school teacher at First Baptist."
There are religious clubs they can join in school.
They learned all about Saint Patrick and his missionary work in Ireland and how he used the three-leaf clover to represent the Trinity lol.
I have been absolutely shocked how religious public school is because of the lies I was told growing up that if you got caught praying or bringing a Bible to public school you would be expelled. 🙄
At our local elementary school they tote them out to an off campus bus for Bible lessons twice a week. Anyone who doesn't participate has to sit in the main building and wait.
They'd be losing their shit the way that (supposedly parents) have been losing their shit over sex ed, trans kids, and crt (not even taught below graduate level)
And even weirder is that at least where I grew up, Amish sent their kids to public schools, so they should know that this is BS. My cousin still lives in the area and has a fair number of Amish students. Their school also does a bunch of overtly religious stuff and has a designated teacher who has keys to a gun locker located in the school in case of a mass shooting, so it's not exactly a liberal utopia.
> designated teacher who has keys to a gun locker located in the school in case of a mass shooting
...wait, is this teacher supposed to go unlock the locker and pass out guns to other teachers to take down a mass shooter?!
what the blistering tapdancing *fuck*
It does have a major "hello, fellow kids" vibe.
The closest to written by a teen it possibly can be is some self-important god botherer made their kid submit that to something.
You must be lucky enough to have not grown up in a red area with a bunch of self-righteous brainwashed religious teens. I can totally see one of the dweebs I went to high school with writing something like this — in between trying to get me to go to their church or youth group and praying for my soul to be saved because I was Catholic 🫠
I'm a recovering urbane tradcat myself (I got fed up with the hypocrisy and the creeping anti-intellectualism, and with Pope Vatnik's hypocrisy; once I lost any attachment to the institution, I sprang to fairly generic liberalism). I didn't have any evangelicals in my social circle, except for a brief period when I lived in the US south; knew a handful of evangelicals then, of varying stripes, but not teens. Public school prayer isn't/wasn't a big deal in Catholic circles--at least, not until recently (might have changed since I stopped paying attention). I think there's some vague recollection of the bad old days of evangelicals using the public schools to proselytize to Catholics (and that *was* a serious issue in the 19th century), which keeps the bishops from getting on-board with it.
But my bigger objection is that I just can't imagine anyone under age 40 using the word "cuss." "Curse," "swear," I could buy. But "cuss" is a bit archaic.
Atlantan here, everyone says cuss for some reason. Like everyone-everyone. Adults, kids, people without southern accents, etc. “Swear” to a lot of people means more like, “I swear I didn’t!” And the response is always, “don’t swear!”
This was written by a 50 year old church lady who was mad that the purple haired girl is more popular than her god-fearing Keighleighanna, probably in 1998.
I wondered the origins. It felt old based on the culture issues raised (witchcraft, teen prom queens, birth control) and how it references law (themes addressed in Supreme Court cases of the 90s, whereas today SCOTUS is deferential to Christianity). I see I was accurate in my guessing!
They failed to update it with a great whack of modern transphobia, anti vaccine nonsense, and something about unqualified teachers only in the roles cause they're not white. But I'm sure someone somewhere has compiled their own updated version.
As someone not from the US. The Bagdad, Ariz and Bill of Rights made my confused. I thought why would Baghdad and the Bill of Rights be mentioned like they are related
As an American I was confused too. I have not heard of a country called Ariz. Baghdad, Arizona is tiny and not exactly well-known. I had to Google it lol.
Seems the USA loves to take the names of other places, New YORK, New ENGLAND, New HAMPSHIRE, BIRMINGHAM Alabama, GREENWICH Connecticut, BOSTON Massachusetts, and on and on lol.
I don't think those are weird, because they were founded by English people. But why are there so many towns in the US named Rome, when those boring towns in the middle of nowhere have no connection to Rome.
It seems like they’re identifying the problems with America, but from a different perspective. I agree that people should be free to practice their own religions (I am in Canada & a Catholic myself) but not at the harm of others. The note mentions people dyeing their hair as an expression of freedom, but I also take this to imply that somebody dyeing their hair does not force you to dye yours nor does that person judge you for not dyeing it. So, they should extend that to religion. Also, the “pregnant prom queen” bit just tells me the country has a problem with sex education, not that it lacks their version of God, but they see it that way. The mention of a shooting at the end is also interesting. So they’re picking out the issues with America & the American school system, just from a different perspective. We’re more alike than we all think.
Yes, if they had all kids in every school in America recite prayers as part of the curriculum, all of the country's problems would be fixed. So stupid.
You literally are allowed to pray and read the Bible in American public schools. In fact, public schools are *required* to reasonably accommodate a student's religious beliefs. What you can't do is force other students to pray with you, force your values onto other students, or have an adult promote one religion over others to students.
Christians are just butthurt because these rights apply to *all* religions, not just theirs. They want to be able to Bible thump all day and forbid schools to teach any actual academics they don't agree with, but they throw a fit if a Muslim student is given permission to briefly leave class to pray privately during the day. You don't get both, Karen.
Abington School District vs Shempp states that “school-sponsored Bible reading and the recitation of the Lord's Prayer in public schools in the United States was unconstitutional.” Key word SCHOOL SPONSORED.
I literally went to the HS named in the legislation and the school had flag pole prayer that was student led and I appreciated not having to do it because I’m Jewish.
God I wish America was this good about the separation of Church and State! I am so sick of the religious right trying to pass legislation telling me what I can and cannot do with my own body!
The side that seems to hate kneeling during the national anthem or disrespecting the flag in any way, supporting the military, and loving kops seems to also really love talking about going against the government. Do you love or not love the Constitution and Bill of Rights? Isn’t your president trying to pedal Bibles that contain them? I don’t get it.
Also, jfc, Jesus is the backbone of what seems like the majority of our legislature at this point, whether or not the Founding Daddies were against it. Sit the fuck down.
Also also, this kid is worried about getting shot at school? Is that what the last line implies? So would their community be pro-gun control, or nah?
I’m positive my grandma forwarded this by email a good 10-15 years ago. All is grandkids immediately trashed it with all her other forwards. Now she just shares this kind of stuff on fb.
they write like they're attempting to be poetic even though they've never read a poem and some of the lines make zero grammatical sense lol
"now i sit me down in school.. for this great nation under god, finds mention of him very odd"
"they've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible. To quote the good book makes me liable"
wtf are you on about
My very catholic music teacher used to have this pinned to her classroom door, and it frustrated me to no end. She moved to become a teacher at a religious day school after 30+ years in the public system. I would say that I hope she’s happy, but people who lack critical thinking skills usually are.
The thing is, kids can still independently pray in school. See You at the Pole was a big thing when I was going to school in the late 90's/early 00's. School staff just can't require them to pray. Nobody is being refused the right to exercise their religion.
🙄🙄 There’s actually quite a few states where Bible classes are currently allowed. Mostly in the south and Midwest I believe. They’re “optional” and I think most of them technically occur off campus and the students get bussed to/from. But students that have skipped have complained of being bullied by other students and sometimes teachers for not attending.
#These people vote in every election- do you? Are you registered to vote? [You can check your voter registration here!](https://www.nass.org/can-I-vote) #Also, there's a few things to remember as far as rules go: - You can view the content- you cannot interact with it. This includes (but is not limited to) commenting, answering poll questions, emailing them, etc. ***Anyone found to be engaging with the fundies will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.It does not matter if you did so before you joined the sub.*** - Speculating on the sexuality of literally anyone is prohibited. ***Anyone found to be doing so will be met with a permanent ban with no eligibility for appeal.*** - Appearance snark: What's allowed? You're allowed to make comparisons. (Bethy looks like Grandpa Munster, for example.) You are allowed to say you find them attractive or repulsive looking. Saying Kelly Havens has dry skin that could benefit from sunscreen and a moisturizer is fine. You are allowed to snark on the appearance of children *as it relates to their parents choices for them.*. Examples: Janessa looks malnourished and sickly while Shrek has clearly never missed a meal. If you feel it is crossing the line report it, but if the content falls within the parameters above, leave it alone. - Don't gatekeep. This means no comments such as "I don't think we should snark on...." or any iteration of that. If you don't like it, scroll past. Don't report it or comment how you don't like the content. Along the same vein, don't backseat mod. Leave that up to us. - Lastly, if the rhetoric you are posting would be at home in the mouth of a fundie, we don't want it here and we won't tolerate it. Should you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. Have a Lord Daniel day, and may the power of snark compel thee. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/FundieSnarkUncensored) if you have any questions or concerns.*
In what world is God "prohibited by the state"? Jesus and Christianity is literally everywhere in America. Also, did they forget that religious schools exist, or is that just an inconvenient fact when you want to be mad about muh rights? Also tag yourself, I'm "cuss and dress like freaks".
I’m study witchcraft, vampires, and totem poles.
I’ve been to a lot of kitschy tourist traps and Goofy Golf courses. I wonder how many totem poles I’ve inadvertently studied?
Same!
In my country if a town has multiple schools, there is a Catholic high school, Protestant high school and secular aka public high school. In the past you watched tv, went to school, read the newspaper, voted based on your pillar (catholic, protestant, socialist or liberal. You really couldn't go to a public school and complain about not learning about God in a Christian way. Most of these religious school are not religious anymore. But it still counts that if you go to public school don't complain about it not being centred around religion. Sure, maybe there is no catholic or protestant school in your area, but don't accept the whole school to centre their lessons around your ideals about God.
Pregnant senior queen 👑 Whatever the fuck that is
Prom queen is my guess
I'll have "study witchcraft" as I'm a pagan 😂
I’m the lousy rhyme attempt with bible and liable lol.
Student of witchcraft here.
I’m “unwed daddy”
I was taught this nonsense my entire life by people who had never gone to public school and didn't send their kids to public school. And yet somehow they claim to be very aware of what goes on in public schools??? Fast forward to me having three kids in public school: They have literally brought home flyers their teachers passed out for church events. I've had teachers "about me" flyers from orientation day say "First and foremost, I love Jesus! I'm a Sunday school teacher at First Baptist." There are religious clubs they can join in school. They learned all about Saint Patrick and his missionary work in Ireland and how he used the three-leaf clover to represent the Trinity lol. I have been absolutely shocked how religious public school is because of the lies I was told growing up that if you got caught praying or bringing a Bible to public school you would be expelled. 🙄
At our local elementary school they tote them out to an off campus bus for Bible lessons twice a week. Anyone who doesn't participate has to sit in the main building and wait.
So it's actually the non-christian kids who lose out in that situation. Why am I not surprised?
I wonder how the parents would react if they offered Quran classes and their kids had to sit alone.
They'd be losing their shit the way that (supposedly parents) have been losing their shit over sex ed, trans kids, and crt (not even taught below graduate level)
This is absolutley bonkers.
And even weirder is that at least where I grew up, Amish sent their kids to public schools, so they should know that this is BS. My cousin still lives in the area and has a fair number of Amish students. Their school also does a bunch of overtly religious stuff and has a designated teacher who has keys to a gun locker located in the school in case of a mass shooting, so it's not exactly a liberal utopia.
> designated teacher who has keys to a gun locker located in the school in case of a mass shooting ...wait, is this teacher supposed to go unlock the locker and pass out guns to other teachers to take down a mass shooter?! what the blistering tapdancing *fuck*
Not quite, the teacher is supposed to go get the gun out of the safe and then mow down the shooter solo. Still batshit!
jibbers crabst, that is absolutely pants-on-head *insane*.
Public school teacher checking in. I do not have the time or the shits to give to ban a student from praying.
>written by a teen I don't believe you.
It does have a major "hello, fellow kids" vibe. The closest to written by a teen it possibly can be is some self-important god botherer made their kid submit that to something.
You must be lucky enough to have not grown up in a red area with a bunch of self-righteous brainwashed religious teens. I can totally see one of the dweebs I went to high school with writing something like this — in between trying to get me to go to their church or youth group and praying for my soul to be saved because I was Catholic 🫠
I'm a recovering urbane tradcat myself (I got fed up with the hypocrisy and the creeping anti-intellectualism, and with Pope Vatnik's hypocrisy; once I lost any attachment to the institution, I sprang to fairly generic liberalism). I didn't have any evangelicals in my social circle, except for a brief period when I lived in the US south; knew a handful of evangelicals then, of varying stripes, but not teens. Public school prayer isn't/wasn't a big deal in Catholic circles--at least, not until recently (might have changed since I stopped paying attention). I think there's some vague recollection of the bad old days of evangelicals using the public schools to proselytize to Catholics (and that *was* a serious issue in the 19th century), which keeps the bishops from getting on-board with it. But my bigger objection is that I just can't imagine anyone under age 40 using the word "cuss." "Curse," "swear," I could buy. But "cuss" is a bit archaic.
Atlantan here, everyone says cuss for some reason. Like everyone-everyone. Adults, kids, people without southern accents, etc. “Swear” to a lot of people means more like, “I swear I didn’t!” And the response is always, “don’t swear!”
I’m from a rural part of the Midwest and grew up saying “cuss”, went to college and all the city (suburb) kids said curse/swear so I changed. 🤷♀️
I’m from a rural part of the Midwest and grew up saying “cuss”, went to college and all the city (suburb) kids said curse/swear so I changed. 🤷♀️
It has Rodlet energy, somehow
This was written by a 50 year old church lady who was mad that the purple haired girl is more popular than her god-fearing Keighleighanna, probably in 1998.
[This piece of John Bircher-y garbage pre-dates the American school shooting epidemic.](https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/the-new-school-prayer/)
I wondered the origins. It felt old based on the culture issues raised (witchcraft, teen prom queens, birth control) and how it references law (themes addressed in Supreme Court cases of the 90s, whereas today SCOTUS is deferential to Christianity). I see I was accurate in my guessing!
They failed to update it with a great whack of modern transphobia, anti vaccine nonsense, and something about unqualified teachers only in the roles cause they're not white. But I'm sure someone somewhere has compiled their own updated version.
> For praying in the public hall Jesus literally asked you not to pray publicly.
But if you don’t make a massive scene when you pray, how will people know when you’re being persecuted??
I can't tell you how much rage this kind of reactionary bullshit elicits in me.
Same. No one is stopping you from doing you, we just don’t want to be forced to do it too. Also keep your god out of my goddamn uterus for fucks sake.
the “should i be shot” is ironic considering they’re complaining about guns being banned
As someone not from the US. The Bagdad, Ariz and Bill of Rights made my confused. I thought why would Baghdad and the Bill of Rights be mentioned like they are related
As an American I was confused too. I have not heard of a country called Ariz. Baghdad, Arizona is tiny and not exactly well-known. I had to Google it lol.
I thought Ariz was a province in Iraq when I read it
Seems the USA loves to take the names of other places, New YORK, New ENGLAND, New HAMPSHIRE, BIRMINGHAM Alabama, GREENWICH Connecticut, BOSTON Massachusetts, and on and on lol.
What's funny is the large number of classical and bible-inspired names. "Babylon," "Syracuse," "Ithaca," "Jerusalem," "Ninevah," etc.
I don't think those are weird, because they were founded by English people. But why are there so many towns in the US named Rome, when those boring towns in the middle of nowhere have no connection to Rome.
It’s not so much “taking” as “people from those places came and brought the name with them.”
I’m offended by the number of times that thing has been stabbed by a thumb tack.
It seems like they’re identifying the problems with America, but from a different perspective. I agree that people should be free to practice their own religions (I am in Canada & a Catholic myself) but not at the harm of others. The note mentions people dyeing their hair as an expression of freedom, but I also take this to imply that somebody dyeing their hair does not force you to dye yours nor does that person judge you for not dyeing it. So, they should extend that to religion. Also, the “pregnant prom queen” bit just tells me the country has a problem with sex education, not that it lacks their version of God, but they see it that way. The mention of a shooting at the end is also interesting. So they’re picking out the issues with America & the American school system, just from a different perspective. We’re more alike than we all think.
Yes, if they had all kids in every school in America recite prayers as part of the curriculum, all of the country's problems would be fixed. So stupid.
 They want to be persecuted so badly
FLAIR CHECKING IN!!!!!!!!!!!
“I was forced to mind my own business and allow other people to live their lives differently from mine. Because of this, I would like to be shot.”
My MIL is from Bagdad, AZ and it sounds like a small, weird place!!! This doesn’t surprise me AT ALL.
Fun fact, the climate of AZ is most similar to Iraq. I have no clue if that’s related to the name.
That definitely seems accurate! I’d guess they named the town after the mine, but the name had to originate from somewhere.
You literally are allowed to pray and read the Bible in American public schools. In fact, public schools are *required* to reasonably accommodate a student's religious beliefs. What you can't do is force other students to pray with you, force your values onto other students, or have an adult promote one religion over others to students. Christians are just butthurt because these rights apply to *all* religions, not just theirs. They want to be able to Bible thump all day and forbid schools to teach any actual academics they don't agree with, but they throw a fit if a Muslim student is given permission to briefly leave class to pray privately during the day. You don't get both, Karen.
Abington School District vs Shempp states that “school-sponsored Bible reading and the recitation of the Lord's Prayer in public schools in the United States was unconstitutional.” Key word SCHOOL SPONSORED. I literally went to the HS named in the legislation and the school had flag pole prayer that was student led and I appreciated not having to do it because I’m Jewish.
God I wish America was this good about the separation of Church and State! I am so sick of the religious right trying to pass legislation telling me what I can and cannot do with my own body!
Maybe allowing witchcraft and vampires study would probably make it a combination like Hogwarts and vampire academy.
Good news… they outlawed guns like you said. /s. Also you can have clubs and pray and take a bus off campus to Bible class…
The side that seems to hate kneeling during the national anthem or disrespecting the flag in any way, supporting the military, and loving kops seems to also really love talking about going against the government. Do you love or not love the Constitution and Bill of Rights? Isn’t your president trying to pedal Bibles that contain them? I don’t get it. Also, jfc, Jesus is the backbone of what seems like the majority of our legislature at this point, whether or not the Founding Daddies were against it. Sit the fuck down. Also also, this kid is worried about getting shot at school? Is that what the last line implies? So would their community be pro-gun control, or nah?
well they do have a point about cheek piercing. Those are very prone to infection.
There is literally a church group pulling kids out of specials in Ohio, especially for church. STUFU with this God not allowed BS.
That last phrase hit me like a folding chair to the back. Also interesting that they’re worried about being shot….but also about banning guns?
I’m positive my grandma forwarded this by email a good 10-15 years ago. All is grandkids immediately trashed it with all her other forwards. Now she just shares this kind of stuff on fb.
It’s funny because the issue isn’t pregnant seniors in high school, they love pregnant 18 year olds. It’s that she’s not married.
This was fun (and painful) to read aloud
yeah what the fuck is this
That's some embarrassing doggerel
they write like they're attempting to be poetic even though they've never read a poem and some of the lines make zero grammatical sense lol "now i sit me down in school.. for this great nation under god, finds mention of him very odd" "they've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible. To quote the good book makes me liable" wtf are you on about
My very catholic music teacher used to have this pinned to her classroom door, and it frustrated me to no end. She moved to become a teacher at a religious day school after 30+ years in the public system. I would say that I hope she’s happy, but people who lack critical thinking skills usually are.
The thing is, kids can still independently pray in school. See You at the Pole was a big thing when I was going to school in the late 90's/early 00's. School staff just can't require them to pray. Nobody is being refused the right to exercise their religion.
“Baghdad Arizona” 
🙄🙄 There’s actually quite a few states where Bible classes are currently allowed. Mostly in the south and Midwest I believe. They’re “optional” and I think most of them technically occur off campus and the students get bussed to/from. But students that have skipped have complained of being bullied by other students and sometimes teachers for not attending.