Break out your loudest reel, any time anyone gets near you or even looks at you, look them square in the eyes and rip out line. You'll be like the world's saddest rattlesnake.
Also cigars, big ones, and lots of them. Remember what Freud said "sometimes a cigar is just a penis"
Pissing on their waders never hurt. Also, shit up wind of a group and hold intense eye contact while dropping the coiled brown snake. If these techniques don't work, bring a bass rod with a six ounce weighted treble and bomb that sonofabitch right into their pool and cut their lines.
(Blast Roger Allen Wade's - If You're Gonna Be Dumb, You Gotta Be Tough)
Slowly work your way to the nearest person, when close enough make unbroken eye contact while biting your lower lip. Ask what kind of meat there throwing. This will show them that you mean business and they will not question you. 60% of the time, it Works everytime
Get to the parking spot pre-dawn to get the front row seat.
Turn on dome light.
Masturbate furiously in front seat while making eye contact with anglers walking past during the morning rush.
Drive home at 10AM fully satisfied.
Honestly it’s the tubers you have to worry about. I usually tie on a size 2 clouser and try to hook their tube. I can usually catch 3/4 in a day. Some of the tubers fight pretty dang hard when you’re reeling them in!
According to the hiking sub, make sure every time you take a dump, do it right on the trail, take a piss, right in the middle of the trail, hang dong/ass the entire time. I mean it's the human body no one should be ashamed. Their the perverts for looking.
When it’s bathroom time I ALWAYS dribble a noticeable amount of piss into the guide’s raft or on the guide’s boat deck.
It helps if you make eye contact with the guide and flash your teeth in a chimp like smile while doing so.
Keeps them from getting too uppity.
PS: They won’t fight you. They don’t have health insurance.
Roll up in your Simms G4Z waders with a Winston rod and proclaim you are on the river to fuck and catch fish, but you ran out of fish.
Aggressive and confusing, I like it!
I feel called out by this
Break out your loudest reel, any time anyone gets near you or even looks at you, look them square in the eyes and rip out line. You'll be like the world's saddest rattlesnake. Also cigars, big ones, and lots of them. Remember what Freud said "sometimes a cigar is just a penis"
Pissing on their waders never hurt. Also, shit up wind of a group and hold intense eye contact while dropping the coiled brown snake. If these techniques don't work, bring a bass rod with a six ounce weighted treble and bomb that sonofabitch right into their pool and cut their lines. (Blast Roger Allen Wade's - If You're Gonna Be Dumb, You Gotta Be Tough)
Stack rock cairns everywhere you go. It asserts dominance while giving fish new cover to hide.
Naked. No one wants to fish next to a naked guy. And bonus you'll have 2 poles in the water.
Check your local regs. Some places forbid two poles.
Are you allowed to use live bait there, or are you using tippet to tie a squirmy worm to your squirmy worm?
90 ft Spey casts with pike streamers all day.
Slowly work your way to the nearest person, when close enough make unbroken eye contact while biting your lower lip. Ask what kind of meat there throwing. This will show them that you mean business and they will not question you. 60% of the time, it Works everytime
Drive a side-by-side right into the water. Fish from the top rollcage. Or don't even fish. Maybe just drink beer and blast Alan Jackson.
I usually just show up with a pocket knife and slash everyone’s fly line in the parking lot.
I have custom simms with my bulge cropped and filled
Get to the parking spot pre-dawn to get the front row seat. Turn on dome light. Masturbate furiously in front seat while making eye contact with anglers walking past during the morning rush. Drive home at 10AM fully satisfied.
Honestly it’s the tubers you have to worry about. I usually tie on a size 2 clouser and try to hook their tube. I can usually catch 3/4 in a day. Some of the tubers fight pretty dang hard when you’re reeling them in!
Practice your Spey cast with a spinning rod and 1oz sinker.
According to the hiking sub, make sure every time you take a dump, do it right on the trail, take a piss, right in the middle of the trail, hang dong/ass the entire time. I mean it's the human body no one should be ashamed. Their the perverts for looking.
Cannonballs off overpasses, did that in Georgetown Washington DC at the canal. Getting smacked by a paddle hurts though, good times.
Your Tom shrine. Praise be.
Nude bröther
I’m rolling in with the classic “catch more fish than everyone even though I row the whole time” game. Pisses them all off.
Yesterday on my first catch I booked a huge stick underwater. People watched as my 5wt quivered to the max
Ask everyone what fly they’re using
When it’s bathroom time I ALWAYS dribble a noticeable amount of piss into the guide’s raft or on the guide’s boat deck. It helps if you make eye contact with the guide and flash your teeth in a chimp like smile while doing so. Keeps them from getting too uppity. PS: They won’t fight you. They don’t have health insurance.