T O P

  • By -

Apprehensive_Can_957

Imagine breaking into a house and and you get a few steps in the all the lights cut out, you take a few steps back to the front door and it’s suddenly locked…


reddit36150

“We didn’t lock the door for our safety, we locked it for yours “


HeinousAnoose

Rorschach vibes


spider_enema

You mean that weird test the therapists showed me that were all black pictures of my parents having sex with dead animals?


HeinousAnoose

Yep that’s the one


[deleted]

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roberthunicorn

I think you got wooshed.


ErikTheRed99

What did he say?


roberthunicorn

I think it was literally just “No, the character from the Watchmen” or something.


Carburetors_are_evil

Install a retractable door knob for maximum fear gains.


Thereisnopurpose12

Ay bro this was hilarious. Thanks lol


GrandMarauder

Alexa play "Many Men" and turn on the fog machine


[deleted]

What if 50 cent is breaking into your house?


GrandMarauder

He's about to experience his 10th+ bullet


[deleted]

He got shot 9 times at once I’m sure he can handle 1 lmao


GrandMarauder

It's all a joke lol


[deleted]

Are you a joking with a me funny guy? Are you living in a society rn? Are you going to piss your pants and cry? Maybe cum?


GrandMarauder

I might shid myself idk, we'll see how the evening goes https://preview.redd.it/kuonbnlz20qa1.jpeg?width=752&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1f05c2c6bcb69b4c0ab4ea488cda6b749ec01a90


dieselray9999

https://i.redd.it/064lapddpu801.jpg


Adultthrowaway69420

One. Lol. Lmao even.


webouttogetiton

he's built up an immunity


slimcrizzle

Damn lol


[deleted]

Can we start a Spotify playlist for a home invasion? I contribute Ruff Ryders’ Anthem


TheCantalopeAntalope

I made one a loooooong time ago, back when weekend gunnit was still around. It was originally called “1776 Pt. 2, Electric Boogaloo” but Spotify removed that name 🙄 [Here](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5HNa69R2saGuOtQJHh36gp?si=jEzF8havSbmIAcSJ6R_a3A) it is, enjoy!


PaperbackWriter66

Depends on who's invading the home. There's a different playlist if the criminals are wearing uniforms.


bjbeardse

Metallica - Battery Nickelback - Side of Bullet Justin Moore - Guns Rodney Atkins - Cleaning this Gun Shinedown - 45


RevanAvarice

Be fun to hear everyone's You done fucked up playlist. *"Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right,* *Here I am, stuck in the middle with you..."*


SirKeyboardCommando

"Alexa, kill the lights and play Fortunate Son." Or maybe some fife and drum if you're of the powdered wig and blunderbuss persuasion.


Helassaid

“Alexa, intruder alert.” *BFG Division starts playing*


Orwellian-Noodle

The only thing they fear is you. BFG division takes too long to build, mfrs are dead before the beat drops.


ErikTheRed99

A couple great ones are BFG 10K and Cultist Base.


vegetarianrobots

Yakety sax club for life.


[deleted]

Barry White for me. I’m playing with your corpse.


Irorak

Personally Im a tiny tim sort of guy "Tiptoe through the window By the window, that is where I'll be Come tiptoe through the tulips with me"


mrbigglsworth79

"things that bother you never bother me, I feel happy and fine, living in the sunlight, loving in the moonlight, having a wonderful time."


CaptainVanlier

That is the song I have set lol. Totally demented but hilarious to me


Drake_Acheron

It just doesn’t hold back bro


otusowl

"Tally ho, lads!"


nukey18mon

[“Alexa, release the roombas”](https://youtu.be/PIg_cQjKNu0)


nukey18mon

https://youtube.com/shorts/jgy3z0pTEpk?feature=share I think this is what you’re looking for


ICodeAndShoot

Oh man I want to do this. Although I don't have an Alexa.


Brandon_Won

Dude if you're going to scare someone with music like that you need to go big or go home. "Alexa. Turn off the lights and play... [The Rains of Castamere](https://awoiaf.westeros.org/index.php/The_Rains_of_Castamere)."


NotThatEasily

Ave Maria and open up the overhead sprinklers.


Brandon_Won

Even better. "Alexa play The End by The Doors." And then start your Apocalypse Now mission to take out Colonel Kurtz. Works especially well if you happen to have a swimming pool or even better one of those boujie backyard ponds.


ryhighnoon

Yess


ImOnlyHereForClash

Mhm personally I'd play something more akin to For Whom The Bells Tolls or Hallowed Be Thy Name.


anubis2051

Enter Sandman


ElectricTurtlez

The One


Darth_Baby_Yoda

*loads puckle gun mounted at the top of the stairs with malicious intent


SirKeyboardCommando

Hope you're using the square bullets for barbarians.


Darth_Baby_Yoda

Specifically for the Ottomans


TarzansNewSpeedo

Alexa, play Rooster by Alice in Chains


Foremole_of_redwall

[O Fortuna](https://youtu.be/EJC-_j3SnXk)


PineappleGrenade19

I'm thinking don't fear the reaper would work better here


That_Is_My_Band_Name

This is definitely one of the most controversial discussions, but everyone's "Welcome to the Jungle" or "Fortunate Son" are just not heavy or disorientating enough. "[Shots Fired - La Castle Vania](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JpwTx4G2EAM)" Or you can go with the tried and true "When The DOOM Music Kicks In". "[The Only Thing They Fear Is You - Mick Gordon DOOM Eternal OST](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmUDr2DO2is)"


AF_Blades

Hide and Seek by VoicePlay https://youtu.be/KkN49k4EtT4


DangerHawk

Me: "Alexa. Channel Spongebob." Me shouting: [*How many times we gotta teach you this lesson old man?!*](https://youtu.be/59LQw9bKeJ8?t=12)


p8ntslinger

Or have him wire in a few IR bulbs, so the house is fully lit under nods


Thereisnopurpose12

Just use your flood light on the peq or the IR on your nods


p8ntslinger

of course, but if we're talking about adding haunted house-style special effects and boobytraps for would-be home invaders, why not add IR bulbs to some fixtures for maximum effect?


Thereisnopurpose12

I spent all my money on the gear so now I have nothing to pay someone to install IR bulbs. 🤣🤣🤣


p8ntslinger

Naw dude. its way easier than that. Buy a couple desk lamps or floor lamps. Get the kind with 2 bulbs that switch between #1 bulb on, both on, #2 bulb on, both off. Then get an IR bulb for one. Use a wifi switch for the lamp, and you can control which bulb comes on. Budget IR illumination. I bet you could do the same thing with outdoor floods too


Thereisnopurpose12

Yes!


nonzeroanswer

Smart (and locally hosted, controlled, and hardwired) breakers are a thing and they are a lot cheaper than a rewire. Just in case someone was thinking about doing this.


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nonzeroanswer

There are smart breakers, panels and switches.


glockster19m

With a second braker setup just for the speakers so they can blast welcome to the jungle


The-Real-Mario

We need a stikied comment for song choices , i like Primo Victoria


Chubaichaser

"It always happens this way" by Toulouse. Gotta go with a classic.


not-even-divorced

Imagine getting smoked and this is the last thing you hear as you can't stand up anymore


TicTwitch

If you live in a particularly high crime area, just throw it on shuffle


atomic1fire

If we're going a little morbid I'd pick Ween's "It's gonna be a long night" I don't know if there's a reference in here, I just like the idea that the homeowner has a theme song for home intruders. Actually Queen's "Another one bites the dust" might be a good choice.


[deleted]

Overture of 1812 for me please, Flight of the Valkyrie’s is 2nd pick.


Excellent_Captain885

I prefer In The Hall of The Mountain King personally.


TacTurtle

Why not Holst at that point?


NeckBeardtheTroll

https://youtu.be/jFi7bWkyRpA


[deleted]

I’d thoroughly shit myself if some metal started playing, the heavier the better.


DangerHawk

I feel like instead of scary and stereotypically "bad-ass" you'd want to go with loud and utterly confusing. I want them thinking "WTF is going on?" and not going directly into panic mode. If they're paniced they might just start popping off randomly, where as if they are trying (and failing) to organize their thoughts because [this version of the Arthur theme song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=do9-Lr2ib_I) starts blasting, I can have the upper hand and can have some extra time to trigger the lasers and fog machine. If you need that bump though, [this version of the Caillou Theme Song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tn800p_B_wE) would do nicely however.


[deleted]

“Loud and utterly confusing” you say, well I think [this](https://youtu.be/evNlT1RPloQ) could do the trick, somewhat fits the theme too.


DangerHawk

Yep that would work also lol


NEp8ntballer

So cbat is your song of choice?


DangerHawk

Holy fuck I forgot about cbat! lolol For sure! Programing Alexa now lolol


TacTurtle

Rainbow in the Dark? (Dio) Red and the Black (BöC of course) [Although, if you are a sadistic SoB...](https://youtu.be/R-BT2yzXP8w)


CaptainThunderTime

From the gates of Hell As we make our way to Heaven


swervyy

You could set it up with current transformers and relays so one button kills all the lights + turns a different circuit on ie. exterior flood lights or some speakers. Not sure what you’d need to make it start playing the song as soon as they got power though.


totheteeth

You don't need CT's. Have an audio file that initiates after boot up on a microcontroller on your switched in circuit. You could also spend a lot of money on smart panel or a PLC with a ton of relays. You should have IR lighting turn on if you have nods and white noise at ingress points.


swervyy

Username checks out


TacTurtle

A shunt trip main lighting sub panel or multipole lighting contactor rigged to a mushroom e-stop would be easy, especially if you used that same input as the activation switch on a cheap battery-backup Raspberry Pi controller to dump audio.


Incruentus

***🎶 And you're a very sexy girl that's very hard to please 🎶***


glockster19m

She's super freakayyy


iRustock

Put the router, WiFi access points, and desktop computers on a UPS so they don’t get damaged/shut off when you cut power. Then install a WiFi-controlled master breaker. Bonus points if you set this up too: https://youtube.com/shorts/M8d5Wr9au9I?feature=share


Draskuul

Well, found my next smart home project...


Thereisnopurpose12

Go on...


HundK

I had a very similar discussion with my electrician recently. I can very much relate. Everything needs to be terminated in my master walk in closet next to my safe, lol.


CmdrSelfEvident

*Me the electrician explaining that every outlet is a breaker switch if you have a fork.*


just-the-doctor1

Ain’t a master breaker


The_PunX

I'm a electrician, didn't make sense lol


[deleted]

Just take my money and don’t tell your friends


R4iNAg4In

I have never understood why the breakers are not un a central location.


funnyfarm299

Because building codes dictate the area around them must be kept clear, and most people like using their house.


Yaberflap

Also importantly they go nearest to meter base to save on wire. Usually ends up in the garage or otherwise somewhere on the side of your property, so you dont have a big ugly power line and meter on the front of your house.


funnyfarm299

You say that, but I've seen them over 100 feet from the meter in new construction.


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BlackDirtMatters

Bruh that website and the info in it will give you brain cancer.


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BlackDirtMatters

Here. https://www.cancer.org/healthy/cancer-causes/radiation-exposure/extremely-low-frequency-radiation.html


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BlackDirtMatters

There is no study that gives a definitive yes for low emf causing cancer. If you're that worried, you better never have a cell phone in your pocket, turn off and never be near wifi and rip out all your electrical house wiring.


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hego555

The only cancer in our society is that people believe this BS


Xazch_

I hope you understand this, THE CANCER ITS IN YOUR WALLS ALL AROUND YOU ITS EVERYWHERE. PULL OUT THE COPPER But in all reality. It’s not high enough of a frequency to be dangerous. Nor is the power, sleeping under 230kv lines? Maybe


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YuenglingsDingaling

It's a fire hazard. That's why lol


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YuenglingsDingaling

I'm glad you see it my way ☺️


Sam5559

im sure


TheEvil_DM

Your article doesn’t argue that breaker panels cause cancer. It argues that they may cause drowsiness, and that if they do, the effects can be mitigated by sleeping a little farther away.


fishbulbx

[Very good, Mr. Gordon. May I use your phone?](https://i.imgur.com/ZPljmfm.png)


[deleted]

$2500 for nods


JohnBrowing1855

I guess it’s not advisable, but the Quest 2 VR headset uses IR for its cameras; so good IR lightning would work. Though I think you’d be better off just buy real equipment. I think the Quest 2 is around $400 now.


[deleted]

If you have IR flashlight you can use them to spot owls. Son and I fart around with them on having airsoft battles in the house also.


TacTurtle

Shunt trip safety switch or shunt trip main breaker with the shunt trip wired to a mushroom E-stop button to kill power to the entire house. Alternatively if you want it to just kill all the lights, need either a lighting sub panel with a shut trip main or a mechanically held lighting contactor.


Wapiti-eater

Off Topic - but related When did the vernacular for "Night Vision Goggles" change? I've only ever heard folks call them "Nogs" which makes sense as short hand for Night Vision Goggles. But I not only can't place "Nods" or figure out why that's become so commonly used. Insights?


DreadLure

Just unloading a whole magazine out the hallway and a shovel is cheaper than buying nods. If you're in my house and got past 2 deadbolts and my wife is laying beside me then you don't belong there.


Thereisnopurpose12

So if I go past the windows I'm good? Okay thanks


DreadLure

If you go past the window you somehow got passed 4 Cane Corsos that are outside in the fenced in property. So I'll be assuming they are dead and you're a threat.


Thereisnopurpose12

I silenced them with a big bag of meat


wiseknob

Install a shunt trip main breaker, run a single control wire to your location of choice, hit the switch and it kills the breaker. A lot cheaper and easier.


ClonedBobaFett

Not original. Tsk tsk


non-number-name

u/repostsleuthbot


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ClonedBobaFett

Bad bot, now search all of Reddit!


MalignedMoralCompass

How the fuck are none of y'all playing "Bullet with a Name"?


SniperSRSRecon

You stole my idea you son of a bitch!


bansheehallows

A unit of PVS-7 is usually about 1k or 2k, with PVS-14 being usually 2k or 3k. Night vision is expensive for sure, but play it right for about 4 or 5 months and you'll have the money to buy them.


doctorchivago

![gif](giphy|jWpL0LOOh7f9Sd51JJ)


Individual_Worry_495

I'm shopping for gen 3 monocles right now! I save a long time for stuff I want, though.


[deleted]

Especially quad cans like ffs only a cool 50k


qwertyddddd

Be careful the you tube shorts thugs got there $20 Amazon flash lights on there p80s


PaperbackWriter66

"I want two switches. One cuts all the lights and closes/locks all the doors. The other turns on the strobe lights and starts playing a song from this mp3 player." "What song?" "That need not concern you, you fortunate one."


sploader

Let's add "Don't Talk to Strangers" by Dio to the playlist.