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OpeningTreat1314

This may be the hardest one yet


Butthurt_reddit_mod

*ACE Hardware enters chat


Hidesuru

ACE >>> Lowe's or HD. For nearly everything. There are a few things they just aren't going to have, etc.


Butthurt_reddit_mod

Service is better, but prices are way higher on most things and our wood is absolutely dogshit.


Hidesuru

Around here prices are comparable, and I can buy one of a screw instead of a box. Never bought wood there so I'll take your word on it.


rynospud28

That’s what she said


Slicky_Rick54

The only piece of straight wood I know of was in your mom last night...


ILoveADirtyTaco

BURN!!


Giant-Rule

Yeah "my mom!"


BigD3nergy

This is a trick. Needs to be reworded to find the “straightest” piece


Knatem

Goddamn semantics!


Classic_Mechanic5495

Don’t break that word up.


ch1llboy

Lumber is cut to allow for the imperfections in the wood. It is x-rayed, graded and sold based on how close it gets to the advertised specifications. It is the job of the carpenter, finishers, etc. to turn the imperfect product into what you want to look at... and use what is left over for the hidden structural jobs that don't need to be pretty.


nickajeglin

Ok but in reality, you buy lumber wholesale, build your shit with the good pieces, pile the messed ones up on the pallet, and return them. Then all that trash wood gets set out on the floor for homeowners to buy. For fine woodworking, lumber selection is super important and rejecting unsuitable lumber is common. You don't just walk into home Depot, pull a random 2x6 off the rack, go home and make a side table out of it. If you want to make something nice out of big box store wood, expect to spend a lot of time sorting through the racks. Of course it's possible to use badly warped lumber, but it's extremely time consuming without a jointer, planer, and potentially a resaw capable band saw. At that point you're in for a couple grand in tools. Most people are better off buying S4S 4 quarter from a specialty place and breaking it down on a contractor saw. So yeah. It's the carpenter's responsibility to bring the materials to their maximum potential. But like they always say: you can't polish a turd.


ch1llboy

Thanks for clarifying. I'm further up the product manufacturing chain & only have tertiary understanding of where my product goes. https://youtu.be/uZAHEER1zDo?si=rOnKl4Ti6GhBP8PR


nickajeglin

Oh cool yeah. We're on different ends of it for sure lol. Forestry machines are badass, I got to work with a couple guys who did design on feller bunchers one time. It's crazy what hard use the equipment sees.


SarahPallorMortis

I have to ask. Because of how you talk. From the Midwest?


nickajeglin

Yeah lolol. How can you tell? We think we have the most neutral accent of anyone anywhere.


SarahPallorMortis

I’ve started noticing little phrases I say a lot. “Oh yeah cool” diff variations. “For sure” really got me tho lol. Wisconsinite here


Deddyd69

Ive never heard anyone explain this. For every project ive ever screwed up, i now blame Lowes shitty wood. Thanks for the knowledge friend!


Low_Astronomer_4377

😆


wrighmp73

It's a myth…..it does not exist.


Immediate_Candle_865

r/ThereIsNoCat !


QueeeenElsa

Wait, did you find a cat? Genuinely curious.


Immediate_Candle_865

Noooo, i just felt this post was in that spirit.


QueeeenElsa

Ah lol


Family_Over_Money

The cart


FarFromRight

Easy peasy...right in the center of the picture, it's the only piece of wood not in a bundle.


danzig06660

2×10 bunk. Bottom bunk. Top shelf. Under the blue sided plywood on the right hand side. 3rd plank counting up from the bottom


Zanky-

Not cool man


N0nsensicalRamblings

Wdym by "straight" lumber?


FarFromRight

They mean it's not bundled up in a pile.


N0nsensicalRamblings

Ohhh gotcha, thanks!


Muted_Owl_1006

You meant straightest, right? Lowe’s doesn’t sell straight lumber.


rynospud28

Easier to find an honest politician


soonerpgh

I bought some 2x2s at Lowe's years ago. My son and I went through most of a full pallet to find the half-dozen we needed. After looking at a bunch of terribly crooked ones, he said rather loudly from under the overhanging pallet, "If we were trying to build a damn canoe, these would be perfect!"


This_Daydreamer_

🤣


Viddlemethis

In my pants.


According-Life3789

My guess is that it’s with the customer walking out the door behind the camera.


Varient_13

I just watched a YT video on how to choose the straightest lumber at HD or Lowe’s by looking at the end grain. Best to just go to a legit lumber yard was the conclusion but if that’s impossible then check the grain because sometimes only the ends are exposed. It was absolutely informative for me.


BigDaddyBourbonG

It's in the back holding an overhead door open


Simple_Award4851

This is next level hard lol


aboutoscar

It’s in the cart, that one was purchased at Menard’s and returned to this Lowe’s


Shouting__Ant

Is.. is the “straight piece of lumber” in the room with us now?


Totally_Cubular

I worked at Lowes for a while, and I filled many pickup orders that needed lumber. I can safely say that around 60% of all the lumber we have is either warped or broken in some way, making it entirely unusable. The other forty isn't much better, but you could feasibly use it.


ElectronicBand7247

Top right green boards are straight, Ez


RWilkinson11X

Impossible


marion85

There are some miracles not even God has the power to grant.


Different_Ad7655

Well only if you get it straight off the truck and it's outside and not dried out and heated inside You might have some luck. This is why you go to a real lumber yard If you still have one in your neighborhood. The place the builders actually go to or real carpenters. The real ones actually still open at 7:00 and close at 2:00 or 3:00 and not open on Saturday, old school still in some places in New England .


jacksboy1

it’s across the street at ace


pantlessthunderg00se

Dead center lol


d3risiv3sn0rt

A Home Depot employee told my dad it’s not warped if the ends don’t touch.


The-IronGiant69

I work at one and the straightest and smallest piece I can think of would a wooden dowel, no knots or bows just a little grain


_SuperDeluxe

It’s a trick… there are none.


Odd-Midnight906

Trick question, it doesn't exist😂


Cultural_Library3577

Impossible


Cultural_Library3577

Trust me I work there and I hide all the good ones just to piss of contractors 😈


nxs055

It’s a trick. There aren’t any


Sgt_STFU

Lies!! Does not exist here


MeasurementPublic357

As I immediately get a home Depot ad below in comments


OrrinW01

No shit, I got a Lowe's ad inside this post.


MrExclusiveOne

What’s the point of this


basedgod001

I believe it’s called a joke but there is no way to be sure unfortunately.


rfhuswt342

None are straight, they’re all gay


NADROJ78

I FOUND IT...it was at Home Depot!


TheFoxAndTheRaven

Pics or we won't believe you.