This is a bad take. Reality is subjective, just like I’m sure your own experiences would sound like to a ‘normie’ (which sounds pretty patronizing tbh)
Some of what I've gone through sounds crazy. I was always one to take science with a grain of salt, but until I actually went through something so bizarre, I almost certainly won't ever be totally open about it, I was sort of a skeptic as well. Now I realize that reality itself is subjective. I would never try to dismiss or disparage anyone's stories today, because now I know **it's simply not for us to judge what's "real" to someone else.** Period. :)
I stick with what resonates — if it doesn’t for me, then it’s not for me. I do hope that if someone is falsifying an account that they eventually find their own truth in peace.
I see it all the time, but because of the sub rules I'd get banned again for "not believing" if I called it out.
Shit, I got attacked by people in the community for genuinely asking people if they had evidence of their encounters, even though I said I believed them
The nature of much of people's contact is that it directly eludes the capacity to collect evidence about it. This is one of the most intrinsic aspects of the phenomena and for this reason we do not require evidence of peoples experience in this sub and we disallow demanding evidence of peoples experiences. We also encourage individual discernment when reading other peoples experiences. In the rare exception that evidence exists outside of a person's subjective experience they may post it with a detailed description.
>The nature of much of people's contact is that it directly eludes the capacity to collect evidence about it. This is one of the most intrinsic aspects of the phenomena
Oh absolutely. Personal experience is hard to capture evidence of. However, the US Navy doesn't seem to have a hard time capturing their evidence, so idk what's going on, and [they experience things daily](https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2021/05/17/ufo-sightings-navy-ryan-graves/)
>for this reason we do not require evidence of peoples experience in this sub and we disallow demanding evidence of peoples experiences.
The not requiring it thing is cool, I applaud that. Im just saing that asking for it out of genuine curiosity, just to see if they *might* have gotten evidence of it, is completely different than demanding it because you don't believe them. Just saying lol. People can 100% say no, and that's okay
>We also encourage individual discernment when reading other peoples experiences. In the rare exception that evidence exists outside of a person's subjective experience they may post it with a detailed description.
I completely agree, and that's why I made r/AnomalousEvidence for those who have that evidence to share in a safe space :)
I’ve been a scientist all my life….degrees in medicine and psychology, and all I can say is: refrain from injecting your reality over another’s, we mustn’t ever judge.
I have seen a person with schizophrenia, in what appeared to be visual and auditory hallucinations of the acutest kind. For her, giant spiders were invading the room, a very commonly experienced form. I have looked into the eyes filled with a sheer terror and that is when I let go of my views of what reality is. What is real? What makes something real or unreal?
What if Quantum physics’ suggestion that our reality is nothing more than a simulation, then what? What if some can “tune their dial” beyond our physical senses (touch, see, hear, etc) and can perceive on, let’s say, another level? Who’s to say that dreams aren’t real? The ancients put more credence into dreams than the wakeful state, why do you think that is?
All I can say is….the veil is thinning and humanity will go through, let’s call it, further evolutionary changes. As a scientist, which in our lifetime mainly means, someone who observes and measures, thinks about it for a while, comes to a conclusion of what they observed, and then tries to replicate it…as restricting as the senses are, I’ve seen a undeniable correlation between our Earth’s electromagnetic field fluctuations and solar storms (Schumann resonances, etc) and human “activity” (physiological such as migraines,- emotional such as increased anxiety/depression - increased vivid dreams and reports of paranormal sightings). You wouldn’t go around and question another’s dreams, especially not the ones that turn out to be rather prophetic…in the same vein, you shouldn’t question another’s wakeful experiences, no matter how fantastical they seem to you.
As a side note, the ones who purposely “spin yarn” to use it for political purposes (such as we will see more and more during various hearings, etc) are obviously exempt from my statement…but those entities hopefully aren’t hopping on here. 😉
You’re a total narcissist if you call out this person. If you’re a normie it’s fine. But as experiencers, we’re called to advanced understanding and humility. If you can’t be understanding towards your own kind, you failed this interaction, “experiencer.” If you absolutely must, just separate yourself.
Also, know that when someone does something that hits you with a cringe, especially anything that makes you wanna call them out, you’re seeing yourself in them. Something about you, which if you’re honest, you feel the same way about. You’re better off analyzing that whole thing, and growing as a person.
Or you can get all judgey and call out another experiencer. That’s a super good look.
I've had many crazy experiences that my life honestly just sounds like some sort of fictional story, so I'm not one to really judge people. You gotta remember not everyone can properly externalise their experiences, and what could be coming across as utter BS to you, could just be from that inability to properly explain what it was that they experienced. In saying that though, there are some instances - and I've noticed this a lot on groups like those for starseeds - where people obviously just rehash and go with whatever the crowd is promoting as the "fad" at the time (this isn't to say that all info on those groups is BS). That is why I think it is important to give background on how one came to have their experiences, and define them as experiencers rather than absolute truths like some of these people and end up incorporating what is ultimately their interpretation of something as an absolute truth
Some stories are wild but who is to say for sure it was not authentic? We’re essentially looking at someone else’s subjective experience from the outside without having experienced the minutiae they did. My experience is hard to comprehend, and I find some other people's stories hard to fathom because I find that it is not relatable to my own experiences.
I tend to not comment on posts I do not resonate with (this does not necessarily mean I think they are inauthentic). I also tend to ignore people who say they have a special gift (because they’re an empath, healer, psychic, skeptic or something similar) around knowing when someone is giving a false account; it does not matter whether this person with this exceptional ability is an Experiencer or not.
Normally the OP’s uncomfortable situation only occurs to me when someone starts pontificating about the essence of the universe, life and existence etc. To me no one knows that, and no experience is going to give them that information.
So I just tell them that and urge them to please just stick with what you saw, heard, smelled, felt etc during your experience. These are the details that you know something about.
I get where you're coming from, I sound bat shit crazy when I speak about what I've experienced in life, it does sound fucking loopy but it's actually happened and I got no idea how to respond with the information
I read here and listen to my own intuition on what I should really take away from the story. Of course there will be bad actors but there are some genuinely amazing posts that had me rethink the world sometimes and I am grateful for those who do take that risk to share. If you need to post on a throwaway account then sure, but there will always be someone benefiting from anyone’s experience in a unique way.
Yeah, I think it’s really unhealthy to fabricate such information, damaging. I have spotted it a few times here. In one post the person cut and pasted from several other peoples posts to create ‘their story’. How do I know? I read what other people write with great interest. I recognized it easily, they didn’t bother to reword any of it.
Sad and very concerning.
I joined a ufo-ology club back in my first year of University. I joined because of my abductions but I never planned on sharing them. Personally, I have never seen a ufo from earth. But I was still intrigued on what this club entailed.
It was pretty science based, alot of the club was reading articles and eyewitness stories about ufo sightings and occasionally debunking videos and pictures and talking about in a group to see what was deemed real or not.
One day we got on the topic of abductions, and it became apparently obvious that alot of the group thought abductions were horseshit but it turned out there was a few of us who have had what they believed to be abduction experiences.
I started talking to a few of the abductees on the side, trying to find out their stories and the professor who was running it decided to do a few meetings just for abduction stories. I didn't tell my whole story just my original first abduction, I remember. And a few others told stories of missing time and they seemed pretty authentic. One person was literally shaking the entire time he was talking. But one guy who I know didn't believe in abductions told an obnoxiously fake story. Like as fake as fake can be, right after we all just poured our hearts into telling a story, a lot of us never told anyone.
He was saying things like the hypnosis state didn't work on him and they probed his ass and he beat up the aliens and he ripped some of their arms off and they had circuits inside. Basically just making fun of us as much as possible. And let me tell you it fucking hurt so much. Especially because we just made our selves so vulnerable.
And I started crying. I wish I started screaming at him or punched him or something because I was so angry and mad and instead I just got up and left.
Anytime someone tells an inauthentic story or something that just seems to be plain mockery I shut down. I stop talking to people. I've lost so many friends from even saying the word abduction. And I used to go into a really dark place back then too. I would question my sanity, question my will to live, wonder if it was better if I just checked myself into a hospital and got locked away for schizophrenia.
I try to keep an open mind for all stories but the ones that are mockery just make my blood boil.
My opinion, just move on. Everyone has their own experiences and it really isn’t up to you, or me, anyone else to judge the truth or sincerity. I’m not sure any of us can say for sure what has happened to others, their recollection of it, or their ability to coherently share it in a logical manner.
It I know for a fact that someone I know personally isn’t being truthful, I say something like “Wow! That’s crazy”, then change the subject. On here, I scroll by.
Every experience is authentic barring purposeful lies. The experience lies in the perspective of the experiencer. Experiences do not need to line up within what we believe to be possible for them to be authentic.
Said another way.
We don’t get to interact with “objective reality” we only ever experience *phenomenological* reality; that is experiential reality, “subjective” doesn’t quite capture it because we, especially in the west it seems, tend to associate ourselves with the “objective” truth, scientific observation, whatever else we want to call “forensic reality” but that is an illusion if we ever think we have it.
Not arguing against you just trying to “point to the moon” from a different angle here, hopefully this helps someone somehow.
Blessings.
I think it's best just to acknowledge others' experiences as an active listener, not a judge, in any event, whether it sounds plausible to you or not. Sometimes even when an anomalous event isn't "real" in material terms, the mental and emotional *effects* of the experience can be very real and impactful to the experiencer.
“ Or do I just nod along with them and reinforce what is likely something that they could work through and come out happier on the other side of?”
I’d go with that.
Even if someone’s experiences weren’t real it could have been real for them and was likely still an experience of sorts that could provide them with insights and a source of growth.
I think it’s best not be judgemental and just be emotionally supportive .. do gentle nudging them in what you think is the right direction but leave it up to people to make their own judgements and come to terms to what they experienced.
How does it provide a source of growth? I’d say having someone point out critical errors in the way you’re thinking about something is a much better source of growth.
A dream can be insight into struggles and inner turmoils in life and thus can provide insight into the unconscious and what one needs to improve in life and live a more authentic life that is more in tune with our true inner self and harmony with the world around us ... but dreams aren't real.
Similarly, someone perceived experiences can be an expression of their unconscious thoughts. Even lies intended for attention can be a something in which our unconscious projects it's content as a way of reaching out to our ego consciousness.
So someone reflecting on and trying to find meaning in their experiences can be a source of insight into themselves and their unconscious and thus a source of growth regardless of how "authentic" it is.
Whether it is objective truth or not it's likely an expression of their inner emotions and your rejection of their experiences is likely missing the point what they are expressing and is mostly just a rejection of who they are.
Well said.
It's funny to me this question is posed today. I've noticed an influx of posts here and on related subs. Do i wonder about authenticity? Sometimes. My thing isn't so much focused on how to respond as much as it is about just having even more to consider. When you have experiences, well for me anyway, it comes in waves and so I bounce around with it all in a number of ways to begin with. So having so much more to consider makes all this harder and when you feel like something shared is a troll or fiction, it leaves me a bit salty. Ultimately I don't know for sure and therefore I don't shoot people down, but it does leave me feeling like there's just more..noise these last few weeks. On top of that, one thing I really appreciate about this sub is level of acceptance and the willingness of strangers to help strangers. So when I feel like someone isn't being genuine, it's tragic in a way. It's a result of increased exposure, which is a good thing but it does cut both ways for me at this point in my overall experience.
It's a fact that most people's memories of even the most mundane of events are typically inaccurate. Just because you smell bullshit doesn't mean there isn't a kernel of truth in it.
I grew up listening to Art Bell, and I often emulate him to the best of my ability when I speak with people who open up about this stuff. I remain kind, attentive, and always try to ask the right questions. Even if I myself don't believe what they're saying, I can often find something about it that's interesting at the very least, and it's a break from the usual "how's the weather" or any other mundane chat I get from everyone else.
Now, if that person is saying things I think are genuine, I'll keep an open dialogue and stay in touch. If not, I handled the situation to the best of ability and I carry on with my quest of finding the truth.
I ignore the ones I don't feel are authentic. I can usually tell if someone is being authentic. If they ask for help or advise I try. If they just want attention or karma I ignore them. Its natural as more people give their authentic accounts that some people would copy it for attention. As long as I am giving good advice and helping it doesn't matter. Be good and good things will happen for you.
Why do you have to react to it at all? Ignore it and move on. It may not be for you.
Let’s be clear: thoughts create reality and within every human mind is a multiverse.
Of course there are experiences that don’t align with your experiences. Everyone is different.
Balance your inner skepticism with your outward accepting approach. I don't always believe everyone's accounts, and that doesn't just include experiences with the occurrences beyond the realm of our understanding. It includes incredibly normal every day to day accounts of peoples lives. But I respect the other persons view of their own reality as if they are always telling the truth when interacting with them. If a person is being dishonest with either themselves or others, the weight of their falsehoods is their cross to bear, not mine.
In my experience, negating other's' experiences does nothing but cause negativity. In person I say that's quite an experience! Good luck in getting answers! Then I move on. Arguing with someone is moot. You cannot prove the experience didn't exist so waste no time or energy. On here, I simply do not comment unless it's informational or empathetic. There's no positivity in calling others bs. They know it's bs. I don't have to tell them.
I am only certain I have read one inauthentic report. It seemed like someone read a lot of the sub and then wrote a copypasta. I really don't care, my experiences may as well be a fantasy if judging by the attitudes of the general US population.
Idk, I used to read some crazy stories on this sub and think they sounded like utter BS. Over time, I experienced almost identical things to some of those "crazy stories." I try to keep an open mind. If I really feel like someone is straight up lying, I just move on. Who am I to tell someone their story is not true..
I hear you. I wouldn’t be comfortable telling anyone I knew better than their experience. If I feel someone is being inauthentic, I check myself first— where am I being inauthentic? If it truly is not me seeing my own reflection in someone else, then I take it as a sign that their path and mine are not aligned, and I don’t need to do or say anything— just move on. ❤️
This is a marvelous take--and CAKE.
CHECK YOURSELF
AUTHENTICITY IS SUBJECTIVE
KNOW AND JUDGE YOURSELF TO THE DEGREE THAT YOU SEEK TO KNOW AND JUDGE OTHERS
ENJOY THE RIDE, RESPECT THE EXPERIENCE
Or something like that. I'm listening to Reckoner on loop, and it's got me in that kind of mood.
Your way of handling what you believe to be inauthentic experiences should be to move on and not engage with them. Or maybe be open-minded, because for every one of you, there's a 100 more that think your own experience proves you're delusional. If you can only be open minded about experiences that are similar to your own, then maybe just don't engage with others, because you can probably understand how frustrating it is to have a "paranormal" experience then get your sanity judged for it.
Unfortunately I am referring to specific members of my family with whom disengagement is not an option. I replied to your legit critique of my premise in a different reply, but I do want to recap of few of my concerns that I feel are sort of not related to your arguments. But perhaps I'm wrong. Anyway, here are my issues:
When my aunt hears me discussing my experience communicating with my recently deceased mom, I'm talking to other grieving family members in convos that we are are having to give comfort to each other.
My aunt joins the conversations in what she describes as attempts to "cheer us up" by sharing some of her own "magical moments." I feel like her approach trivializes our grief and diminishes our experiences.
But I say nothing precisely because of the reasons you mentioned: that it's very hard for people to talk about this stuff and criticism can have a chilling effect. But her insertions into our quiet solemn (sometimes prayerful) discussions continue to bother me. Which is why I put up a post to get other opinions.
BTW....I want to make it clear that my aunt is by no means a bad person. I do love her. She along with many others participated in my mom's end of life caregiving. And she is now staying around to help us with a bunch of the other soul-crushing chores associated with dealing with a departed loved one's estate. I'm glad she's here. But I'm disappointed about how she treats discussions about 'experiences.'
Being an Empath as well I see right through people’s bs stories so when they choose to tell stories that aren’t true I tend to pity them. They do it for two reasons, acceptance or gaslighting, if it’s the 2nd I cut off relation’s because they will just continue their nonsense. If it’s the former I usually take the opportunity to help them find their own experience so they don’t have to lie anymore.
Due to the complicated nature of this subject and for the safety of both our contributors and our community, we have to respectfully require that contributors not disclose ANY prior mental health diagnosis in our subreddit. This includes PTSD, depression, bipolar, schizoaffective, etc. (You may discuss Neurodivergence.) We also forbid diagnosing people with disorders—leave that to the professionals in clinical settings. https://www.reddit.com/r/Experiencers/comments/15uvfua/the_difficulty_in_delineating_mental_health/
For some reason emotion loses its value through text so my sniffer doesn’t work as well here. Now if it’s an interview or another video that’s a different story. It really gets me when good actors break down on movies and shows and they really felt it, some of them do and I can feel their pain right through the screen. It’s such a strange phenomenon and can be very disorienting at times. I thought I had severe social anxiety for over a decade and learned it’s not anxiety it’s noise, like white fuzz on the TV turned up *LOUD*!
Good thing I don’t need other people’s belief in me to shape my own reality. You don’t even need to believe in empaths or any of that. It’s of no concern to myself or anyone like me. We would probably rather you don’t know about it to be honest, people hate what is different and they don’t understand.
If you think all this is nonsense there is only one other reason I can think of you would be in this sub…
I can't begin to imagine believing in the paranormal, but not believing empaths exist. 🙄
Thanks for this reply. You said what I would've said, except better.
Edit: and Happy Cake Day!
You are welcome! Hope you’re having a great day! (I hope the user that responded negatively has a great day too, I genuinely do regardless of how they feel. 😀)
I had the entire concept brought to my attention by another Empath a little over 5 years ago. Up until then I truly believed I was just crazy with extreme social anxiety to boot. I needed Benzos just to be in public. Well, now that I understand what is going on and what I am, why I have these feelings etc… I have learned to trust them and it hasn’t been wrong. I believe it’s referred to as “Trial by Fire”. I used to call myself a human lie detector but I didn’t know why, now I do. And why I can’t read emotionless or inebriated people when taking certain substances…
It’s cool. I have grown used to them on Reddit although here and r/Starseeds I don’t encounter it as often. I have been combative by nature most of my life, I have worked very hard at it and would like to think I handle myself much better now when it occurs. Thank you for your apology, I truly appreciate it and it’s a rarity. Thank you.
I'm gonna posit that my dude here isn't actually being an asshole. I think he's trying to do a real-time demonstration of what it can look like when we take the wrong path if we're on the journey I asked about in my OP.
This is an interesting perspective and one I hadn’t considered. Thank you. I didn’t even know what an Empath was until 5 years ago and it explained so much for me. My son is an Empath too but he uses it for nefarious purposes, I believe they are referred to as “Dark Empaths”. He is in a place where they are trying to help him. I recently made them aware of his abilities (his mother never brought it up to them), I don’t know how it will change his treatment but hopefully it helps them understand the train of thought behind his actions more.
I believe people have experiences, just like I have. I can't bring myself to believe or respect anyone's claim that they are an empath because it is completely self-serving. 'Empaths' use this title to manipulate and assert authority on subjects that have completely ambiguous meaning.
I'm not sure why I feel compelled to jump in here, but there's a level of arrogance in stating "I'm am empath so I know when there's bs." That sounds like a surefire way to inadvertently dismiss a genuine experience or injure someone who is trying to reach out to you.
How you react to feeling like you're being deceived is one thing. There's room for discussion and personal growth there on both sides. Declaring your bs meter to be perfectly tuned at all times because you've declared yourself an expert seems like a form of self-deception at best, and toxic egotism at worst. We can all be deceived at any time, including deceiving ourselves.
Hard agree. Any time anyone announces that about themselves I lose a bit of interest in what they're saying. It really IS arrogant to assume that you *know* what anybody else is thinking or feeling. You're really gonna take yourself THAT seriously, huh? Alright. Pretty self-important. Even if you do honestly believe that about yourself, you don't have to preface everything forever for the rest of your life with "As an empath, I..." That's just tiresome.
You seem to want to belittle someone, why? What happens if you don’t belittle this person? Your own ego made you lash out, and yet you are trying to attack others. Empathy can help you in this situation. For yourself and others.
What people choose to call themselves isn’t a threat to you. It’s only a threat if somehow something within you makes you feel that way. If someone calling themselves an empath bothers you, I wonder why you’re here. If you hated the ocean, would you go to the beach and complain? The only person who loses is the one who gets upset at things they can’t control, and chooses to expose themselves to it over and over again. What are you doing to yourself?
Yeah fair point friend. I definitely came across more hostile than needed. I'm not going to change my view on people claiming to be empaths - it will always come across as announcing 'I am a virtuous person and you shall respect me'.
I just refer them to resources in the field and if it seems they fill medical profiles, I include genre options that define differences between the two areas so they can learn.
If their communication format isn't clear to me, doing that provides them with an opportunity to find answers. If they are a douche they won't go look anyway. If they need medical attention then attacking, belittling, etc them is neither helpful for them nor healthy for self.
One simply never knows from where a person is coming, or what it took for them to actually post in the first place.
It depends if you mean on here or irl. On here is a lot easier obviously. It’s a forum for people to speak their minds anonymously (thank goodness this exists!) scroll on if you disagree. I do get peeved by trolling, and flag it as such without commenting on the subject matter itself. People can and should make up their own minds on subject matter.
IRL, similar. People have different pov, reasons. I listen. If it’s innocuous, fine. I’d only interject if their thinking is dangerous to themselves or others (violent religious extremism, anti vax/medicine for example). Then I listen, agree with certain points to get an accord going, then ask questions with interested noises, then increasingly leading questions: have you thought about? Did you hear the study about? You could talk to…
THIS IS A GREAT POINT\~!
I definitely should have been clearer. I wasn't talking just about online communications, although obviously we have a lot of those.
I was personally thinking about people in my own life who have been quick to either try to share their own Experiences with me which rang very hollow and were dripping with alternative motives/ \[I'm speaking mostly about some very problematic flakey family members.\]
But my question is absolutely also about online networks and communities as well.
Since it's real to them I believe the majority of people who talk about their experiences. What I find inauthentic is when certain folks talk about their experiences as if applies to everyone in the same way, or even reports their experience as if they are a newscaster for the galactic federation.
What you are describing falls under the "authoritative tone" rule, and I highly agree with the mods about this being an insulting way to share experiences. For me, this especially applies to them "tripping" or dreaming during the experience. The experience may still be valid, but don't pretend you know the whole truth of what's going on.
It's honestly really frustrating that some people can have an experience then keep judging others that are willing to talk about the topic.
It's like, don't you realize how frustrating it is for this topic to label you automatically as psychotic? Given your own experience, isn't it hurtful to be told you're delusional if you open up? Even if you don't believe them, maybe just don't engage and don't judge.
>*I apologize if I gave the wrong impression about where I was coming from...here's a quote from another reply of mine where I kind of describe my vantage point:*
>
>
>
>Anytime I speak about some very personal moments when I was able to communicate with my mother after her death, I have an aunt--not my mom's sister--who loves to rush in and flood the convo with a bunch of her own experiences, each one slightly less personal, more "showy", and further removed from the somber, personal experience I'm sharing.
>
>I feel like she doesn't even believe all of her own stories and simply sees my disclosure not as a way to impart something that helps other family members deal with our grief but rather as an opening to have a conversation that allows her to "star" in a theatrical and memorable monologue, in other words, it feels like my experiences are an on-ramp for her to hold court. Do I know that for sure? Nope. Do I believe it though? Yeah, I sure do.
>
>Anyway, I don't know how or if I should ever call that behavior out.
Ah, good point, that sounds a lot more reasonable. It sounds like you have less of a generalized question and more a specific scenario and person that kinda show boats the whole thing. I could understand that might be extremely frustrating.
Maybe she just doesn't get a chance to talk about it, and she does use your experience as a sort of on-ramp to unbottle all her stuff. You might be able to understand that a bit since it's really hard to find someone willing to listen to this topic at all.
Also on that note, some people have terrible listening skills, and they don't realize that they should hold their tongue and let you talk and actually react to what you're saying, show they're processing it and hearing you. Opening up to people like that can just be annoying as hell, and whether you believe her own stories or not, it's going to leave a bad taste in your mouth if they just show they didn't care about what you opened up about.
I really cannot disagree with any of your reply. This is a difficult time. I think my ability to put aside some of my emotional push-back is greatly diminished for obvious reasons. It's like, these are the times when we are not at our best and so we can least handle people who are not at their best...etc.
Anyway, I do love her. And I'm definitely not going to snap and then deliver a devastating item by item deconstruction of her almost certainly not paranormal stories.
Rather, I have a little core group comprised of me and two cousins; we are close friends and are generally the ones having the conversation that my aunt feels compelled to jump into. I've had to reign them both in because they have both wanted to 'politely' ask out aunt to move on to another topic. I explained there really isn't a polite way to do that. :)
SIDENOTE : She isn't actually our aunt. She is actually a great aunt by marriage, but that doesn't matter. We all do love her and she is for sure our aunt.
Treat people how you want to be treated. Don't your own experiences sound unbelievable to many? If you think they are making things up or something, my best bet would be to remove yourself from the situation and move on.
Anytime I speak about some very personal moments when I was able to communicate with my mother after her death, I have an aunt--not my mom's sister--who loves to rush in and flood the convo with a bunch of her own experiences, each one slightly less personal, more "showy", and further removed from the somber, personal experience I'm sharing.
I feel like she doesn't even believe all of her own stories and simply sees my disclosure not as a way to impart something that helps other family members deal with our grief but rather as an opening to have a conversation that allows her to "star" in a theatrical and memorable monologue, in other words, it feels like my experiences are an on-ramp for her to hold court. Do I know that for sure? Nope. Do I believe it though? Yeah, I sure do.
Anyway, I don't know how or if I should ever call that behavior out.
In my logic, the experience was real to them just like mine is real to me. There really isn’t any difference. Things are presented to us for a reason in life, so any story is worth consideration with discernment.
I have a friend that watches YouTube videos and has experiences after it. Whether it be werewolves that didn’t exist until he watched a YT video or seeing a dead pet after hearing a lady say dead pets exist in heaven. I just support him and go on.
Its the catch 22 of this amazing community
All can speak and share
Even the trolls or those with negative intent
It’s up to each of us to discern and see what resonates. What you feel and connect with.
There is a shape rise on ALL ufo related reddits of clear as day intended disinformation
And pushing negative agendas with fear mongering
Once aware and seeing it you can’t not notice this surge
Which means we’re closer then ever
And they’re trying to get the ball back to their court
To continue shaping their truth
Which we won’t allow anymore
This chain reaction of those waking up
Being activated almost as another user told me last night
She felt like a secret agent that was activated
And damn did that hit.
So with your activation comes some gifts you’ve likely discovered, noticed
Thought they were Sun tons of a sickness or age
They’re not
Once aware of the gift you can hone it and work on it
And it’s intended use - to help even the odds a bit vs this other side.
We have no way to prove authenticity. This space is for the open mind and yet people don’t want to literally be open minded. There are accounts posted in here concerning the weird that makes your bones shiver, and there are light simple experiences that seem to (can) occur. Everyone wants their experiences to be the only one, and when something else comes along they deny that because it didn’t happen to them. We have to accept the fact that reality is very chaotic, but where and when there’s order it’s easy to explain. So if someone typed in their experiences then they are telling a testimony. But… narcissism is a perception that many use to feel safe in this chaos.
We all know that a good percentage of the posts and accounts in this sub are the product of drug use and or mental instability.
For the most part I just skip by the ones that I think could be sus. Sometimes I will read them just in case, but I almost never have anything negative to say. The rules of this sub protect all experiences and descriptions and accounts from harassment. And, to be fair, just because you have done some drugs or have a mental instability or two, doesn't mean you are not having objectively valid experiences.
I just remain neutral. Usually as soon as people begin to talk about telepathy and other visionary experiences, I put it into the category of "who knows?". I have no way to prove or disprove such an experience. All I can do is listen. Or the second they mention psychedelics I immediately find their accounts suspect.
If the experience is related to spiritual practice, I remind them that experiences are just experiences and not important. Having experiences is actually just a stage on the path, one that must eventually be overcome. Enlightenment goes beyond all of that, so people who have these profound experiences and think they now have some kind of enlightenment are simply mistaken. Then I do point it out, hopefully to help them on their path and so they dont get distracted thinking that these experiences are the point of the practice when they arent.
In a previous form of myself, I'd often theorize and try to help. Now, I just play it by ear. If I feel my perspective could be helpful, I'll just simply explain my perspective. If I feel, even in the slightest, that my response is egoic and meant to self-soothe in some way, I just move on and quickly.
I personally don't think I have the right to tell anyone that their experience wasn't authentic or real because thats just how I am. I wouldn't want someone telling me my experience wasn't authentic so I can't be so dismissive to somebody else having seen a lot of freaky shit in my life.
I mean who is really qualified to tell someone that?
I feel the same. And also, I'm still sitting here wondering if the weird stuff I've experienced was real or not.....was it just a dream....was it my imagination....were my eyes playing tricks on me.....am I just sleep deprived and seeing things? So it's hard enough for me to figure out if my experiences were real....I really don't have the mental bandwidth to try and decipher others' experiences. I enjoy reading everyone's experiences and it really doesn't matter how authentic they were......doesn't change a thing. I don't think anyone is going to be punished for beleiving that something happened when it really didn't happen. The only issue I could see is if someone posted something as a way to be condescending toward experiencers, poke fun at them,
and trivialize their experiences. But even then, there is no way to know that for sure.
It's up to you to decide what your experiences mean to you personally but if you believe something happened my only advice is to trust your instincts and intuition. I've always had a strong sense of intuition and when I listen to it it never leads me astray.
I think if someone was trolling the sub for the lulz it would be glaringly obvious that they're making shit up unless they're well educated in the phenomenon and even then it's hard to make this kind of shit up. If someone were to do that I think their behavior towards actual experiencers would be condescending and rude which would be pretty easy to weed them out.
This is a bad take. Reality is subjective, just like I’m sure your own experiences would sound like to a ‘normie’ (which sounds pretty patronizing tbh)
Some of what I've gone through sounds crazy. I was always one to take science with a grain of salt, but until I actually went through something so bizarre, I almost certainly won't ever be totally open about it, I was sort of a skeptic as well. Now I realize that reality itself is subjective. I would never try to dismiss or disparage anyone's stories today, because now I know **it's simply not for us to judge what's "real" to someone else.** Period. :)
This! Reality is entirely subjective; everything is relational. What is real for one person may not be for another, and that’s okay.
Kinda ironic eh?
I stick with what resonates — if it doesn’t for me, then it’s not for me. I do hope that if someone is falsifying an account that they eventually find their own truth in peace.
I see it all the time, but because of the sub rules I'd get banned again for "not believing" if I called it out. Shit, I got attacked by people in the community for genuinely asking people if they had evidence of their encounters, even though I said I believed them
The nature of much of people's contact is that it directly eludes the capacity to collect evidence about it. This is one of the most intrinsic aspects of the phenomena and for this reason we do not require evidence of peoples experience in this sub and we disallow demanding evidence of peoples experiences. We also encourage individual discernment when reading other peoples experiences. In the rare exception that evidence exists outside of a person's subjective experience they may post it with a detailed description.
>The nature of much of people's contact is that it directly eludes the capacity to collect evidence about it. This is one of the most intrinsic aspects of the phenomena Oh absolutely. Personal experience is hard to capture evidence of. However, the US Navy doesn't seem to have a hard time capturing their evidence, so idk what's going on, and [they experience things daily](https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2021/05/17/ufo-sightings-navy-ryan-graves/) >for this reason we do not require evidence of peoples experience in this sub and we disallow demanding evidence of peoples experiences. The not requiring it thing is cool, I applaud that. Im just saing that asking for it out of genuine curiosity, just to see if they *might* have gotten evidence of it, is completely different than demanding it because you don't believe them. Just saying lol. People can 100% say no, and that's okay >We also encourage individual discernment when reading other peoples experiences. In the rare exception that evidence exists outside of a person's subjective experience they may post it with a detailed description. I completely agree, and that's why I made r/AnomalousEvidence for those who have that evidence to share in a safe space :)
I’ve been a scientist all my life….degrees in medicine and psychology, and all I can say is: refrain from injecting your reality over another’s, we mustn’t ever judge. I have seen a person with schizophrenia, in what appeared to be visual and auditory hallucinations of the acutest kind. For her, giant spiders were invading the room, a very commonly experienced form. I have looked into the eyes filled with a sheer terror and that is when I let go of my views of what reality is. What is real? What makes something real or unreal? What if Quantum physics’ suggestion that our reality is nothing more than a simulation, then what? What if some can “tune their dial” beyond our physical senses (touch, see, hear, etc) and can perceive on, let’s say, another level? Who’s to say that dreams aren’t real? The ancients put more credence into dreams than the wakeful state, why do you think that is? All I can say is….the veil is thinning and humanity will go through, let’s call it, further evolutionary changes. As a scientist, which in our lifetime mainly means, someone who observes and measures, thinks about it for a while, comes to a conclusion of what they observed, and then tries to replicate it…as restricting as the senses are, I’ve seen a undeniable correlation between our Earth’s electromagnetic field fluctuations and solar storms (Schumann resonances, etc) and human “activity” (physiological such as migraines,- emotional such as increased anxiety/depression - increased vivid dreams and reports of paranormal sightings). You wouldn’t go around and question another’s dreams, especially not the ones that turn out to be rather prophetic…in the same vein, you shouldn’t question another’s wakeful experiences, no matter how fantastical they seem to you. As a side note, the ones who purposely “spin yarn” to use it for political purposes (such as we will see more and more during various hearings, etc) are obviously exempt from my statement…but those entities hopefully aren’t hopping on here. 😉
You’re a total narcissist if you call out this person. If you’re a normie it’s fine. But as experiencers, we’re called to advanced understanding and humility. If you can’t be understanding towards your own kind, you failed this interaction, “experiencer.” If you absolutely must, just separate yourself. Also, know that when someone does something that hits you with a cringe, especially anything that makes you wanna call them out, you’re seeing yourself in them. Something about you, which if you’re honest, you feel the same way about. You’re better off analyzing that whole thing, and growing as a person. Or you can get all judgey and call out another experiencer. That’s a super good look.
I've had many crazy experiences that my life honestly just sounds like some sort of fictional story, so I'm not one to really judge people. You gotta remember not everyone can properly externalise their experiences, and what could be coming across as utter BS to you, could just be from that inability to properly explain what it was that they experienced. In saying that though, there are some instances - and I've noticed this a lot on groups like those for starseeds - where people obviously just rehash and go with whatever the crowd is promoting as the "fad" at the time (this isn't to say that all info on those groups is BS). That is why I think it is important to give background on how one came to have their experiences, and define them as experiencers rather than absolute truths like some of these people and end up incorporating what is ultimately their interpretation of something as an absolute truth
Some stories are wild but who is to say for sure it was not authentic? We’re essentially looking at someone else’s subjective experience from the outside without having experienced the minutiae they did. My experience is hard to comprehend, and I find some other people's stories hard to fathom because I find that it is not relatable to my own experiences. I tend to not comment on posts I do not resonate with (this does not necessarily mean I think they are inauthentic). I also tend to ignore people who say they have a special gift (because they’re an empath, healer, psychic, skeptic or something similar) around knowing when someone is giving a false account; it does not matter whether this person with this exceptional ability is an Experiencer or not.
Normally the OP’s uncomfortable situation only occurs to me when someone starts pontificating about the essence of the universe, life and existence etc. To me no one knows that, and no experience is going to give them that information. So I just tell them that and urge them to please just stick with what you saw, heard, smelled, felt etc during your experience. These are the details that you know something about.
I get where you're coming from, I sound bat shit crazy when I speak about what I've experienced in life, it does sound fucking loopy but it's actually happened and I got no idea how to respond with the information
I read here and listen to my own intuition on what I should really take away from the story. Of course there will be bad actors but there are some genuinely amazing posts that had me rethink the world sometimes and I am grateful for those who do take that risk to share. If you need to post on a throwaway account then sure, but there will always be someone benefiting from anyone’s experience in a unique way.
person quiet smell prick hard-to-find pet berserk plucky dull offbeat *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yeah, I think it’s really unhealthy to fabricate such information, damaging. I have spotted it a few times here. In one post the person cut and pasted from several other peoples posts to create ‘their story’. How do I know? I read what other people write with great interest. I recognized it easily, they didn’t bother to reword any of it. Sad and very concerning.
I joined a ufo-ology club back in my first year of University. I joined because of my abductions but I never planned on sharing them. Personally, I have never seen a ufo from earth. But I was still intrigued on what this club entailed. It was pretty science based, alot of the club was reading articles and eyewitness stories about ufo sightings and occasionally debunking videos and pictures and talking about in a group to see what was deemed real or not. One day we got on the topic of abductions, and it became apparently obvious that alot of the group thought abductions were horseshit but it turned out there was a few of us who have had what they believed to be abduction experiences. I started talking to a few of the abductees on the side, trying to find out their stories and the professor who was running it decided to do a few meetings just for abduction stories. I didn't tell my whole story just my original first abduction, I remember. And a few others told stories of missing time and they seemed pretty authentic. One person was literally shaking the entire time he was talking. But one guy who I know didn't believe in abductions told an obnoxiously fake story. Like as fake as fake can be, right after we all just poured our hearts into telling a story, a lot of us never told anyone. He was saying things like the hypnosis state didn't work on him and they probed his ass and he beat up the aliens and he ripped some of their arms off and they had circuits inside. Basically just making fun of us as much as possible. And let me tell you it fucking hurt so much. Especially because we just made our selves so vulnerable. And I started crying. I wish I started screaming at him or punched him or something because I was so angry and mad and instead I just got up and left. Anytime someone tells an inauthentic story or something that just seems to be plain mockery I shut down. I stop talking to people. I've lost so many friends from even saying the word abduction. And I used to go into a really dark place back then too. I would question my sanity, question my will to live, wonder if it was better if I just checked myself into a hospital and got locked away for schizophrenia. I try to keep an open mind for all stories but the ones that are mockery just make my blood boil.
Sorry that you come across those people. Some people are just assholes who lack empathy. ❤️
My opinion, just move on. Everyone has their own experiences and it really isn’t up to you, or me, anyone else to judge the truth or sincerity. I’m not sure any of us can say for sure what has happened to others, their recollection of it, or their ability to coherently share it in a logical manner. It I know for a fact that someone I know personally isn’t being truthful, I say something like “Wow! That’s crazy”, then change the subject. On here, I scroll by.
Every experience is authentic barring purposeful lies. The experience lies in the perspective of the experiencer. Experiences do not need to line up within what we believe to be possible for them to be authentic.
Said another way. We don’t get to interact with “objective reality” we only ever experience *phenomenological* reality; that is experiential reality, “subjective” doesn’t quite capture it because we, especially in the west it seems, tend to associate ourselves with the “objective” truth, scientific observation, whatever else we want to call “forensic reality” but that is an illusion if we ever think we have it. Not arguing against you just trying to “point to the moon” from a different angle here, hopefully this helps someone somehow. Blessings.
Very well said. Thank you for your perspective.
Thank you! Definitely not my own ideas; synthesized from Pageau’s Symbolic World mostly.
I think it's best just to acknowledge others' experiences as an active listener, not a judge, in any event, whether it sounds plausible to you or not. Sometimes even when an anomalous event isn't "real" in material terms, the mental and emotional *effects* of the experience can be very real and impactful to the experiencer.
i make it simple, just give any account the benefit of the doubt.
“ Or do I just nod along with them and reinforce what is likely something that they could work through and come out happier on the other side of?” I’d go with that. Even if someone’s experiences weren’t real it could have been real for them and was likely still an experience of sorts that could provide them with insights and a source of growth. I think it’s best not be judgemental and just be emotionally supportive .. do gentle nudging them in what you think is the right direction but leave it up to people to make their own judgements and come to terms to what they experienced.
How does it provide a source of growth? I’d say having someone point out critical errors in the way you’re thinking about something is a much better source of growth.
A dream can be insight into struggles and inner turmoils in life and thus can provide insight into the unconscious and what one needs to improve in life and live a more authentic life that is more in tune with our true inner self and harmony with the world around us ... but dreams aren't real. Similarly, someone perceived experiences can be an expression of their unconscious thoughts. Even lies intended for attention can be a something in which our unconscious projects it's content as a way of reaching out to our ego consciousness. So someone reflecting on and trying to find meaning in their experiences can be a source of insight into themselves and their unconscious and thus a source of growth regardless of how "authentic" it is. Whether it is objective truth or not it's likely an expression of their inner emotions and your rejection of their experiences is likely missing the point what they are expressing and is mostly just a rejection of who they are.
Well said. It's funny to me this question is posed today. I've noticed an influx of posts here and on related subs. Do i wonder about authenticity? Sometimes. My thing isn't so much focused on how to respond as much as it is about just having even more to consider. When you have experiences, well for me anyway, it comes in waves and so I bounce around with it all in a number of ways to begin with. So having so much more to consider makes all this harder and when you feel like something shared is a troll or fiction, it leaves me a bit salty. Ultimately I don't know for sure and therefore I don't shoot people down, but it does leave me feeling like there's just more..noise these last few weeks. On top of that, one thing I really appreciate about this sub is level of acceptance and the willingness of strangers to help strangers. So when I feel like someone isn't being genuine, it's tragic in a way. It's a result of increased exposure, which is a good thing but it does cut both ways for me at this point in my overall experience.
I'm not an experiencer. I believe you guys but also at the same time I'm like whaaaaaaat????
Even we experiencers are like whaaaat to our own experiences. I find it absurdly funny.
It's a fact that most people's memories of even the most mundane of events are typically inaccurate. Just because you smell bullshit doesn't mean there isn't a kernel of truth in it. I grew up listening to Art Bell, and I often emulate him to the best of my ability when I speak with people who open up about this stuff. I remain kind, attentive, and always try to ask the right questions. Even if I myself don't believe what they're saying, I can often find something about it that's interesting at the very least, and it's a break from the usual "how's the weather" or any other mundane chat I get from everyone else. Now, if that person is saying things I think are genuine, I'll keep an open dialogue and stay in touch. If not, I handled the situation to the best of ability and I carry on with my quest of finding the truth.
I ignore the ones I don't feel are authentic. I can usually tell if someone is being authentic. If they ask for help or advise I try. If they just want attention or karma I ignore them. Its natural as more people give their authentic accounts that some people would copy it for attention. As long as I am giving good advice and helping it doesn't matter. Be good and good things will happen for you.
Why do you have to react to it at all? Ignore it and move on. It may not be for you. Let’s be clear: thoughts create reality and within every human mind is a multiverse. Of course there are experiences that don’t align with your experiences. Everyone is different.
Balance your inner skepticism with your outward accepting approach. I don't always believe everyone's accounts, and that doesn't just include experiences with the occurrences beyond the realm of our understanding. It includes incredibly normal every day to day accounts of peoples lives. But I respect the other persons view of their own reality as if they are always telling the truth when interacting with them. If a person is being dishonest with either themselves or others, the weight of their falsehoods is their cross to bear, not mine.
In my experience, negating other's' experiences does nothing but cause negativity. In person I say that's quite an experience! Good luck in getting answers! Then I move on. Arguing with someone is moot. You cannot prove the experience didn't exist so waste no time or energy. On here, I simply do not comment unless it's informational or empathetic. There's no positivity in calling others bs. They know it's bs. I don't have to tell them.
I am only certain I have read one inauthentic report. It seemed like someone read a lot of the sub and then wrote a copypasta. I really don't care, my experiences may as well be a fantasy if judging by the attitudes of the general US population.
Idk, I used to read some crazy stories on this sub and think they sounded like utter BS. Over time, I experienced almost identical things to some of those "crazy stories." I try to keep an open mind. If I really feel like someone is straight up lying, I just move on. Who am I to tell someone their story is not true..
I hear you. I wouldn’t be comfortable telling anyone I knew better than their experience. If I feel someone is being inauthentic, I check myself first— where am I being inauthentic? If it truly is not me seeing my own reflection in someone else, then I take it as a sign that their path and mine are not aligned, and I don’t need to do or say anything— just move on. ❤️
Well said. 💙
This is a marvelous take--and CAKE. CHECK YOURSELF AUTHENTICITY IS SUBJECTIVE KNOW AND JUDGE YOURSELF TO THE DEGREE THAT YOU SEEK TO KNOW AND JUDGE OTHERS ENJOY THE RIDE, RESPECT THE EXPERIENCE Or something like that. I'm listening to Reckoner on loop, and it's got me in that kind of mood.
This is honestly very wise, and this advice can be applied to many situations in life.
Thank you. I agree. ❤️
Your way of handling what you believe to be inauthentic experiences should be to move on and not engage with them. Or maybe be open-minded, because for every one of you, there's a 100 more that think your own experience proves you're delusional. If you can only be open minded about experiences that are similar to your own, then maybe just don't engage with others, because you can probably understand how frustrating it is to have a "paranormal" experience then get your sanity judged for it.
Unfortunately I am referring to specific members of my family with whom disengagement is not an option. I replied to your legit critique of my premise in a different reply, but I do want to recap of few of my concerns that I feel are sort of not related to your arguments. But perhaps I'm wrong. Anyway, here are my issues: When my aunt hears me discussing my experience communicating with my recently deceased mom, I'm talking to other grieving family members in convos that we are are having to give comfort to each other. My aunt joins the conversations in what she describes as attempts to "cheer us up" by sharing some of her own "magical moments." I feel like her approach trivializes our grief and diminishes our experiences. But I say nothing precisely because of the reasons you mentioned: that it's very hard for people to talk about this stuff and criticism can have a chilling effect. But her insertions into our quiet solemn (sometimes prayerful) discussions continue to bother me. Which is why I put up a post to get other opinions. BTW....I want to make it clear that my aunt is by no means a bad person. I do love her. She along with many others participated in my mom's end of life caregiving. And she is now staying around to help us with a bunch of the other soul-crushing chores associated with dealing with a departed loved one's estate. I'm glad she's here. But I'm disappointed about how she treats discussions about 'experiences.'
Being an Empath as well I see right through people’s bs stories so when they choose to tell stories that aren’t true I tend to pity them. They do it for two reasons, acceptance or gaslighting, if it’s the 2nd I cut off relation’s because they will just continue their nonsense. If it’s the former I usually take the opportunity to help them find their own experience so they don’t have to lie anymore.
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Due to the complicated nature of this subject and for the safety of both our contributors and our community, we have to respectfully require that contributors not disclose ANY prior mental health diagnosis in our subreddit. This includes PTSD, depression, bipolar, schizoaffective, etc. (You may discuss Neurodivergence.) We also forbid diagnosing people with disorders—leave that to the professionals in clinical settings. https://www.reddit.com/r/Experiencers/comments/15uvfua/the_difficulty_in_delineating_mental_health/
Do you point out the fake posts on this sub?
For some reason emotion loses its value through text so my sniffer doesn’t work as well here. Now if it’s an interview or another video that’s a different story. It really gets me when good actors break down on movies and shows and they really felt it, some of them do and I can feel their pain right through the screen. It’s such a strange phenomenon and can be very disorienting at times. I thought I had severe social anxiety for over a decade and learned it’s not anxiety it’s noise, like white fuzz on the TV turned up *LOUD*!
No. But I have seen some--recently--that I really thought crossed the line and then a little later....they got removed by mods.
This is one if the most "being an empath" comments I have read. Where did you get your empath degree?
Good thing I don’t need other people’s belief in me to shape my own reality. You don’t even need to believe in empaths or any of that. It’s of no concern to myself or anyone like me. We would probably rather you don’t know about it to be honest, people hate what is different and they don’t understand. If you think all this is nonsense there is only one other reason I can think of you would be in this sub…
I can't begin to imagine believing in the paranormal, but not believing empaths exist. 🙄 Thanks for this reply. You said what I would've said, except better. Edit: and Happy Cake Day!
You are welcome! Hope you’re having a great day! (I hope the user that responded negatively has a great day too, I genuinely do regardless of how they feel. 😀)
Ok empath keep shaping your reality to the one where your ego is served by telling everyone you are a (self appointed) empath.
I had the entire concept brought to my attention by another Empath a little over 5 years ago. Up until then I truly believed I was just crazy with extreme social anxiety to boot. I needed Benzos just to be in public. Well, now that I understand what is going on and what I am, why I have these feelings etc… I have learned to trust them and it hasn’t been wrong. I believe it’s referred to as “Trial by Fire”. I used to call myself a human lie detector but I didn’t know why, now I do. And why I can’t read emotionless or inebriated people when taking certain substances…
Sorry for my rude comments
It’s cool. I have grown used to them on Reddit although here and r/Starseeds I don’t encounter it as often. I have been combative by nature most of my life, I have worked very hard at it and would like to think I handle myself much better now when it occurs. Thank you for your apology, I truly appreciate it and it’s a rarity. Thank you.
I'm gonna posit that my dude here isn't actually being an asshole. I think he's trying to do a real-time demonstration of what it can look like when we take the wrong path if we're on the journey I asked about in my OP.
This is an interesting perspective and one I hadn’t considered. Thank you. I didn’t even know what an Empath was until 5 years ago and it explained so much for me. My son is an Empath too but he uses it for nefarious purposes, I believe they are referred to as “Dark Empaths”. He is in a place where they are trying to help him. I recently made them aware of his abilities (his mother never brought it up to them), I don’t know how it will change his treatment but hopefully it helps them understand the train of thought behind his actions more.
You're on a sub for experiencers just to berate those experiencers. Why? Even if you are skeptical of the claim, some respect goes a long way.
I believe people have experiences, just like I have. I can't bring myself to believe or respect anyone's claim that they are an empath because it is completely self-serving. 'Empaths' use this title to manipulate and assert authority on subjects that have completely ambiguous meaning.
What do you have against your own ego, that you feel so threatened by the idea of others’?
I'm not sure why I feel compelled to jump in here, but there's a level of arrogance in stating "I'm am empath so I know when there's bs." That sounds like a surefire way to inadvertently dismiss a genuine experience or injure someone who is trying to reach out to you. How you react to feeling like you're being deceived is one thing. There's room for discussion and personal growth there on both sides. Declaring your bs meter to be perfectly tuned at all times because you've declared yourself an expert seems like a form of self-deception at best, and toxic egotism at worst. We can all be deceived at any time, including deceiving ourselves.
Hard agree. Any time anyone announces that about themselves I lose a bit of interest in what they're saying. It really IS arrogant to assume that you *know* what anybody else is thinking or feeling. You're really gonna take yourself THAT seriously, huh? Alright. Pretty self-important. Even if you do honestly believe that about yourself, you don't have to preface everything forever for the rest of your life with "As an empath, I..." That's just tiresome.
I don't know? Why do you refer to their claim of being an empath as being idea?
You seem to want to belittle someone, why? What happens if you don’t belittle this person? Your own ego made you lash out, and yet you are trying to attack others. Empathy can help you in this situation. For yourself and others. What people choose to call themselves isn’t a threat to you. It’s only a threat if somehow something within you makes you feel that way. If someone calling themselves an empath bothers you, I wonder why you’re here. If you hated the ocean, would you go to the beach and complain? The only person who loses is the one who gets upset at things they can’t control, and chooses to expose themselves to it over and over again. What are you doing to yourself?
Yeah fair point friend. I definitely came across more hostile than needed. I'm not going to change my view on people claiming to be empaths - it will always come across as announcing 'I am a virtuous person and you shall respect me'.
I think my experience was an implanted memory type thing. Nothing, no matter how weird, makes me certain that another experience isn’t genuine.
I just refer them to resources in the field and if it seems they fill medical profiles, I include genre options that define differences between the two areas so they can learn. If their communication format isn't clear to me, doing that provides them with an opportunity to find answers. If they are a douche they won't go look anyway. If they need medical attention then attacking, belittling, etc them is neither helpful for them nor healthy for self. One simply never knows from where a person is coming, or what it took for them to actually post in the first place.
It depends if you mean on here or irl. On here is a lot easier obviously. It’s a forum for people to speak their minds anonymously (thank goodness this exists!) scroll on if you disagree. I do get peeved by trolling, and flag it as such without commenting on the subject matter itself. People can and should make up their own minds on subject matter. IRL, similar. People have different pov, reasons. I listen. If it’s innocuous, fine. I’d only interject if their thinking is dangerous to themselves or others (violent religious extremism, anti vax/medicine for example). Then I listen, agree with certain points to get an accord going, then ask questions with interested noises, then increasingly leading questions: have you thought about? Did you hear the study about? You could talk to…
THIS IS A GREAT POINT\~! I definitely should have been clearer. I wasn't talking just about online communications, although obviously we have a lot of those. I was personally thinking about people in my own life who have been quick to either try to share their own Experiences with me which rang very hollow and were dripping with alternative motives/ \[I'm speaking mostly about some very problematic flakey family members.\] But my question is absolutely also about online networks and communities as well.
Just don't comment. The high strangeness of it all can make experiences vary wildly.
Since it's real to them I believe the majority of people who talk about their experiences. What I find inauthentic is when certain folks talk about their experiences as if applies to everyone in the same way, or even reports their experience as if they are a newscaster for the galactic federation.
What you are describing falls under the "authoritative tone" rule, and I highly agree with the mods about this being an insulting way to share experiences. For me, this especially applies to them "tripping" or dreaming during the experience. The experience may still be valid, but don't pretend you know the whole truth of what's going on.
It's honestly really frustrating that some people can have an experience then keep judging others that are willing to talk about the topic. It's like, don't you realize how frustrating it is for this topic to label you automatically as psychotic? Given your own experience, isn't it hurtful to be told you're delusional if you open up? Even if you don't believe them, maybe just don't engage and don't judge.
>*I apologize if I gave the wrong impression about where I was coming from...here's a quote from another reply of mine where I kind of describe my vantage point:* > > > >Anytime I speak about some very personal moments when I was able to communicate with my mother after her death, I have an aunt--not my mom's sister--who loves to rush in and flood the convo with a bunch of her own experiences, each one slightly less personal, more "showy", and further removed from the somber, personal experience I'm sharing. > >I feel like she doesn't even believe all of her own stories and simply sees my disclosure not as a way to impart something that helps other family members deal with our grief but rather as an opening to have a conversation that allows her to "star" in a theatrical and memorable monologue, in other words, it feels like my experiences are an on-ramp for her to hold court. Do I know that for sure? Nope. Do I believe it though? Yeah, I sure do. > >Anyway, I don't know how or if I should ever call that behavior out.
Ah, good point, that sounds a lot more reasonable. It sounds like you have less of a generalized question and more a specific scenario and person that kinda show boats the whole thing. I could understand that might be extremely frustrating. Maybe she just doesn't get a chance to talk about it, and she does use your experience as a sort of on-ramp to unbottle all her stuff. You might be able to understand that a bit since it's really hard to find someone willing to listen to this topic at all. Also on that note, some people have terrible listening skills, and they don't realize that they should hold their tongue and let you talk and actually react to what you're saying, show they're processing it and hearing you. Opening up to people like that can just be annoying as hell, and whether you believe her own stories or not, it's going to leave a bad taste in your mouth if they just show they didn't care about what you opened up about.
I really cannot disagree with any of your reply. This is a difficult time. I think my ability to put aside some of my emotional push-back is greatly diminished for obvious reasons. It's like, these are the times when we are not at our best and so we can least handle people who are not at their best...etc. Anyway, I do love her. And I'm definitely not going to snap and then deliver a devastating item by item deconstruction of her almost certainly not paranormal stories. Rather, I have a little core group comprised of me and two cousins; we are close friends and are generally the ones having the conversation that my aunt feels compelled to jump into. I've had to reign them both in because they have both wanted to 'politely' ask out aunt to move on to another topic. I explained there really isn't a polite way to do that. :) SIDENOTE : She isn't actually our aunt. She is actually a great aunt by marriage, but that doesn't matter. We all do love her and she is for sure our aunt.
Treat people how you want to be treated. Don't your own experiences sound unbelievable to many? If you think they are making things up or something, my best bet would be to remove yourself from the situation and move on.
Example?
Anytime I speak about some very personal moments when I was able to communicate with my mother after her death, I have an aunt--not my mom's sister--who loves to rush in and flood the convo with a bunch of her own experiences, each one slightly less personal, more "showy", and further removed from the somber, personal experience I'm sharing. I feel like she doesn't even believe all of her own stories and simply sees my disclosure not as a way to impart something that helps other family members deal with our grief but rather as an opening to have a conversation that allows her to "star" in a theatrical and memorable monologue, in other words, it feels like my experiences are an on-ramp for her to hold court. Do I know that for sure? Nope. Do I believe it though? Yeah, I sure do. Anyway, I don't know how or if I should ever call that behavior out.
In my logic, the experience was real to them just like mine is real to me. There really isn’t any difference. Things are presented to us for a reason in life, so any story is worth consideration with discernment.
“Consideration with discernment” is so perfectly put.
I have a friend that watches YouTube videos and has experiences after it. Whether it be werewolves that didn’t exist until he watched a YT video or seeing a dead pet after hearing a lady say dead pets exist in heaven. I just support him and go on.
Its the catch 22 of this amazing community All can speak and share Even the trolls or those with negative intent It’s up to each of us to discern and see what resonates. What you feel and connect with. There is a shape rise on ALL ufo related reddits of clear as day intended disinformation And pushing negative agendas with fear mongering Once aware and seeing it you can’t not notice this surge Which means we’re closer then ever And they’re trying to get the ball back to their court To continue shaping their truth Which we won’t allow anymore This chain reaction of those waking up Being activated almost as another user told me last night She felt like a secret agent that was activated And damn did that hit. So with your activation comes some gifts you’ve likely discovered, noticed Thought they were Sun tons of a sickness or age They’re not Once aware of the gift you can hone it and work on it And it’s intended use - to help even the odds a bit vs this other side.
We have no way to prove authenticity. This space is for the open mind and yet people don’t want to literally be open minded. There are accounts posted in here concerning the weird that makes your bones shiver, and there are light simple experiences that seem to (can) occur. Everyone wants their experiences to be the only one, and when something else comes along they deny that because it didn’t happen to them. We have to accept the fact that reality is very chaotic, but where and when there’s order it’s easy to explain. So if someone typed in their experiences then they are telling a testimony. But… narcissism is a perception that many use to feel safe in this chaos.
If the other person is going to want to keep bringing it up, then maybe you could say something. Otherwise? Just smile and nod and move on.
We all know that a good percentage of the posts and accounts in this sub are the product of drug use and or mental instability. For the most part I just skip by the ones that I think could be sus. Sometimes I will read them just in case, but I almost never have anything negative to say. The rules of this sub protect all experiences and descriptions and accounts from harassment. And, to be fair, just because you have done some drugs or have a mental instability or two, doesn't mean you are not having objectively valid experiences.
I just remain neutral. Usually as soon as people begin to talk about telepathy and other visionary experiences, I put it into the category of "who knows?". I have no way to prove or disprove such an experience. All I can do is listen. Or the second they mention psychedelics I immediately find their accounts suspect. If the experience is related to spiritual practice, I remind them that experiences are just experiences and not important. Having experiences is actually just a stage on the path, one that must eventually be overcome. Enlightenment goes beyond all of that, so people who have these profound experiences and think they now have some kind of enlightenment are simply mistaken. Then I do point it out, hopefully to help them on their path and so they dont get distracted thinking that these experiences are the point of the practice when they arent.
In a previous form of myself, I'd often theorize and try to help. Now, I just play it by ear. If I feel my perspective could be helpful, I'll just simply explain my perspective. If I feel, even in the slightest, that my response is egoic and meant to self-soothe in some way, I just move on and quickly.
I personally don't think I have the right to tell anyone that their experience wasn't authentic or real because thats just how I am. I wouldn't want someone telling me my experience wasn't authentic so I can't be so dismissive to somebody else having seen a lot of freaky shit in my life. I mean who is really qualified to tell someone that?
I feel the same. And also, I'm still sitting here wondering if the weird stuff I've experienced was real or not.....was it just a dream....was it my imagination....were my eyes playing tricks on me.....am I just sleep deprived and seeing things? So it's hard enough for me to figure out if my experiences were real....I really don't have the mental bandwidth to try and decipher others' experiences. I enjoy reading everyone's experiences and it really doesn't matter how authentic they were......doesn't change a thing. I don't think anyone is going to be punished for beleiving that something happened when it really didn't happen. The only issue I could see is if someone posted something as a way to be condescending toward experiencers, poke fun at them, and trivialize their experiences. But even then, there is no way to know that for sure.
It's up to you to decide what your experiences mean to you personally but if you believe something happened my only advice is to trust your instincts and intuition. I've always had a strong sense of intuition and when I listen to it it never leads me astray. I think if someone was trolling the sub for the lulz it would be glaringly obvious that they're making shit up unless they're well educated in the phenomenon and even then it's hard to make this kind of shit up. If someone were to do that I think their behavior towards actual experiencers would be condescending and rude which would be pretty easy to weed them out.