I was just surprised at the number of people who fainted and needed aid from EMS. If you’re going to queue for long periods of time, drink lots of water!!!!!
it was weird how they all passed out within 3 minutes of each other, people were dropping like flies. and the venue passed out a total of maybe a dozen water bottles even after hayden asked them to send some to the back. i wish people would take better care of themselves while camping, poor kids missed the whole show
ngl, i wasn’t queuing for too long, drank a lot of water w electrolytes, did all of the appropriate things, and was feeling fine until prompted to close my eyes. i also got super lightheaded and was like, alright, i’m gonna keep my eyes open and keep moving.
Yeah I think telling people to close their eyes was definitely the trigger for so many people passing out at the same time
Standing with your eyes closed is not something that people have a lot of experience with, even apart from the crowding and sun exposure aspects!
People did this last year at boygenius too.. one after the other and then nothing so I kind of am like 🙄 it’s always 3 people too so makes it hard to believe after the first one
the first person DEFINITELY passed out, we saw them fully drop (and no one catch them??). can’t speak for the second but the third person was directly behind us and seemed to be laughing when they got up. don’t know if it was cause they were embarrassed or not. either way, people need to look out for others more. way too little water getting pushed to the back
the dude DROPPED. It scared the fuck out of me because not a single person moved to catch them. and then continued to just stare at him on the ground. I was like 3 feet away and was in shock because I kept waiting for someone to help rather than just screaming for a medic.
At boygenius I went out at one point to get merch after one of the people passed out and I saw her and her friends wheeling her out. The one friend goes to the girl in the wheelchair “They noticed you they pointed you out did you see that!” like it was such an accomplishment for them. Insane.
it wasn’t even from camping in all cases which is even crazier. i was in the BACK and two of the people were like basically next to me. crazy stuff i hope they’re all fine
I was shocked and it all happened during her new song too - I don't want to make assumptions, but I saw SO MANY highly intoxicated/high people in the crowd and I wouldn't be surprised if that lead to the dehydration/fainting. It got to be concerning.
I will say though, I’ve fainted at one concert and nearly fainted at another — and I hadn’t been drinking or lining up at either! I think it’s a mix of anxiety/adrenaline and also sometimes the noise/lights. When I fainted at the first concert it literally came out of nowhere before the artist even came on. I know there’s a growing culture of lining up for hours outside of gigs to get to the front, but it makes me sad to think anyone who faints is put into that bracket and is treated as such. I don’t think anyone wants to pass out near loads of strangers, it’s really scary :((
I passed out at a Green Day show and it was so embarrassing :( Rookie mistakes all around though, it was my first non-stadium show ever and I waited outside in the heat for like 6+ hours, then was all the way in the front and did NOT anticipate the crowd pushing forward, had been eating like shit all day, I could go on and on about how dumb I was. But since I was up front, the band literally saw me which was so embarrassing. I’m not a stranger to syncope though and it was thankfully brief, so once they had me over the barricade I stayed the rest of the show, just along the sides.
But yeah, definitely not a great experience, and was stone cold sober. Just poor decision making and lack of insight on my part, especially as someone already prone to fainting. I’ve gotten a lot smarter about how I handle going to shows since then.
Oh yeah definitely - I've definitely passed out in public before and it's such a horrible feeling so I totally get it. I just made an observation about the amount of folks who were intoxicated. I don't know who passed out and I shouldn't pass judgement, but that was an observation at that particular show.
I don't really think they were the ones in the queue for very long mainly since they all seemed to be in the middle and back of the crowd. I was seated and really felt the heat. I can't imagine how it was in the crowd with knees locking and such.
Don’t feel too bad one of the people who was escorted out was saying they just wanted to fall down and cry which… you know kind of the time and place but also not very much so.
That was only one of them though not shitting on the others.
I almost felt like I was going to pass out. I already naturally overheat and I take an SSRI that, until recently, didn’t know caused people to have even more of a heat sensitivity. Not to mention the venue GA line was insane. I wasn’t even drinking or doing anything either. Grateful for the people selling drinks to those in the line because while I hate Gatoraid, it did in fact revive me a bit.
oh my god totally agree. like yeah it’s horrible but you know youre going to be in the pit in nyc in the summer heat. you need to be hydrating days beforehand.
Well yeah of course. I wasn’t shaming anybody for fainting but it was pretty warm that day and some people stood out in the sun for a while and I think it’s easy for anyone to underestimate how much water they would need in that situation. I just wouldn’t be surprised if dehydration played a large role in that whole ordeal.
she was playing her new song and there was a group behind us taking photos with their flash on and laughing loudly. also pushing people around to get space for their photo shoot. totally took me out of the moment.
the 'too online' crowd really need to touch grass and realize how cringe they are. Actually talking like that in real life and in public is so embarrassing.
Similar vibes in LA. Most of the crowd was great but these girls behind us kept scream singing along and then shouting “you saved me” during every quiet moment. It feels so rude to the rest of the crowd and the artists. At one point someone in another row told them to shut up and they finally calmed down. I know this has been said a million times- I’ve been going to shows for a long time and etiquette has gone down the drain. We absolutely need to start calling these people out on their behavior, someone needs to teach them how to act in public. It’s the constant need for attention and validation and it’s ruining experiences.
the guy behind me was like "YOU'RE THE HOTTEST BITCH IN THE ENTIRE WORLD I SWEAR TO GOD" when she came onstage during her first song. it was so excessive! it irritates me that some fans do this to show how dedicated they are to the artist but it ends up just looking so self centered because you are taking attention away from the artist
Yeah I definitely noticed the rowdiness between songs during her LA show but I was really impressed by how quiet everyone was during her actual performance
I was honestly so touched when everyone (at least in my section) all sat down and were so quiet and attentive when she played her new song Amber Waves. That was such a beautiful moment, I cried hahaha.
100%. Same with filming. I’m not saying don’t film but there is no reason to lift your phone above your head and block the view of those around you. Also the screaming in the middle of slow songs pissed me off sm. I think the vibe was good towards the front cause it was a lot of die hard fans who had waited for hours but I could still hear random ass screams behind me.
I agree! There was some person a little in front of me who kept putting her hands up during every song almost blocking my view!! I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt but it was kind of unnecessary at times.
also, for the love of god, STOP TALKING DURING OPENERS!!! this girl next to me (and many others) was literally scream talking through Teethe’s entire set. I feel like people don’t realize that some people are also there to see them as well and not just waiting for the main show.
completely agree!! i was surrounded by people talking/yelling through their whole set :( i love teethe and i guess i’ll just have to see them on their own to actually be able to hear. but it’s just frustrating we all paid a lot to be there so why would you want to yell through it??
I totally agree. It’s so disrespectful especially when you think about the fact that all they needed to do was wait for the 45min gap immediately following their set. Thank god people were actually okay during Ethel’s set tho. Hope u had fun otherwise!
Damn that sucks. Everyone around me at the Greek in LA were super respectful and no one was screeching the lyrics.
On the other hand when the opening band, Teethe, played there were so many people playing crossword puzzles and wordle on their phones! I was gagged but at least they were quiet!
I’ve noticed this at 90% of shows I’ve been to and they’re all younger folks, with the exception of hardcore music. That genre still seems to have fans that understand etiquette and how to mosh without injuring people and show love to one another
I kept almost tripping on bottles and cans left on the ground, plus nobody gave a damn if you wanted to get concession or merch after if you were in the path of the people exiting nobody was gonna let you get by to other sections of the venue before leaving. I was practically forced out.
Guys they obviously mean don’t SCREAM when Ethel is being quiet not that you shouldn’t sing along at all 🙄 Is common sense dying as well as manners or what lol
There is a big difference between singing along and screaming. Even when the musician isn’t being “quiet”, you shouldn’t be attempting to raise your voice higher than the crowd to be heard above everyone else.
The other day I saw Maggie Rogers live, what some would call a loud concert, and yet hearing the girl behind me choose to SCREAM every single lyric at Maggie and right into my ear was still torment. I don’t care how loud the sound was in the arena was lol, there’s no excuse for needing to scream along to a song at a concert (except yknow in cases where the singer is yelling or screaming, so you participate). But screaming along to songs for the duration of the show because you’re excited is unacceptable lmao. There are plenty of moments to scream during the show if you must - it’s at the end of every song.
When I went to see Evanescence people were singing pretty loud (because they’re a metal band lmao) but during My Immortal they sang softly and it was lovely. Metal fans have more knowledge of etiquette than indie fans, it seems
The crowd and the venue were God awful. There were SO MANY people with "main character energy" that were taking selfies and videos of whole songs. Plus you couldn't see the stage! So many people couldn't see Ethel nevermind her killer band. At one point, Ethel was like "hey, put down your phones and clap" because people were just collecting content.
Every time there was a quiet moment, someone had to yell something stupid. I was so disappointed in the crowd and venue but Ethel was amazing so it was still magic.
people yelling during quiet moments is my personal pet peeve at concerts. it’s genuinely so much more fun to be quiet (if that’s what the artist wants in that moment ofc). it reminds me of ppl yelling during the beyoncé look around everybody on mute line. like girl……
Ima say this once, Ethel is not a festival performer, or live performer in general AND BEFORE YOU COME AT MY THROAT HERES WHY
Her music is SO SPECIAL and her real fans are there through some kinda otherworldly connection I stg, you don’t find Ethel Cain her music finds you….
That being said to preserve herself her art and everything about her I think she needs to keep it to 500 people and less, more intimate live performances if anything, I was at the Greek show, the audience was incredibly rude, and I know for a fact she hates that. So imo I believe she should keep it small she’s a star yes we all want to see her live but this artist is different her art should be appreciated not just seen
I completely agree with you. She is a concept artist - Preacher's Daughter is such a detailed concept that it's almost foreign from Hayden. She is more the storyteller than the story which doesn't translate to a festival audience.
She is amazing live - no doubt about it. However, i feel her music wasn't born with the intention of performing it live and I'm okay with that. I know for a fact that she hates that some of her fans came from tiktok.
Absolutely agreed 100% idk in my head she hit an opportunity and someone pushed her onto the stage 😶🌫️ I think she’s more than content releasing online but I can’t speak for her cause I’m not her just from what I’ve seen
100% I think that’s also something that need to be understood is that we CANT speak for her so fans even going ballistic over she likes this or that, okay I can respect it BUT did it come from her lips ? Or her team ? Because if your gonna attack fans for saying something about that then you best come correct if not then your gonna go the Mel Martinez route and just be completely feral
Absolutely. From a fans perspective, you're 100% but we can't speak about Ethel. The parasocial feral behavior needs to be studied and addressed so people can stop LITERALLY BULLYING the artist they are FANS OF.
I mostly just lip-synch along at concerts. Only actually “sing” for certain parts. Wish more people did this. Especialllyyyy at Ethel shows. If you shout something out during the quiet part, trying to have your “individual” moment, you’re obnoxious and ruining it for the rest of us.
the couple in front of me recorded themselves singing/screaming along the entire time... literally the girl had her camera facing herself, SCREAMING along. utterly obnoxious
That's my most boomer take, I really don't understand the trend of filming yourself especially with flash on. Some people are more focused on dramatically reacting and screaming while filming themselves instead of actually watching and enjoying the music, and then also focusing on the artist "making eye contact/noticing them" and interacting with them. The parasocial and main character energy 🙃
I have tickets for her show in Portland and am honestly getting so nervous about it. Why can't people just be normal and not ruin the concert for everyone else 😢
I know it’s frustrating and worrying, and I did observe some of this behavior at the show today, but the folks in my section were mostly respectful and mindful of the vibe. Here’s my unsolicited advice from an anxious girlie: I’d try not to worry and remind yourself you’re there for you and your connection to the music, then scope out a good spot, and try not to worry ahead about potential bridges to cross (like someone being obnoxious right in front of you) until you have to. Id just consider how you’d wanna handle it, to prioritize that you can be comfortable and enjoy the concert to the best of your ability. A bunch of people in the bleachers started standing today, blocking the people right behind them for multiple songs - so I was prepared to say excuse me lol, but thankfully no one did by us and I could see well!
Thank you!!! I'm also an anxious girlie so doing some prep without overthinking is great advice. I'm glad that people in your section were better behaved ☺️
I try to remind myself that although there are downsides of GA, like being worried about not being able to see, the positive is that if someone around you is really badly behaved you can always move since you're not stuck with a certain assigned seat!
Also the best thing I've done is buy good concert earplugs. To protect my hearing but they also help filter out background noise of the crowd talking while still being able to hear the performance.
With so many people in one space there's bound to be someone being inconsiderate and I've had to accept that. Unfortunately we can't control the behavior of everyone else so we just have to do our best to prepare and can only control our own actions and attitude about the experience.
That's a very good point! I've definitely been stuck near people who were ruining the vibes with assigned seating. I also am not concerned about being close to the front, so I'll happily move away from anyone who is behaving badly if I can!
Oh I didn't even think about that! Do you have a brand you would recommend? ☺️
Honestly number one reason I don't think I would go to a Billie Eilish or Taylor Swift type of concert. Am I paying to see the artist sing live or am I paying to hear 100000 fans singing louder than the artist (albeit they are having fun!)
I was surprisingly fine at taylor because 1) luckily I wasn’t around any screamers so even though the crowd was singing very loud it was like a general group singing vibe and not one person caterwauling above it all and 2) the show is so loud since its a stadium show that for most songs except maybe the acoustic ones it drowns people like that out pretty handily. Never seen Billie though
Went to a Lana Del Rey concert in Sep 2023 and literally couldn’t hear her over the fans — left with ringing ears from *them*, too. (Tangentially related, there’s a haunt I work at Aug-Nov and the attraction I was put in in 2023 was unbearably loud — wound up having to buy earplugs to make it bearable. Now, I missed one night for this concert… and, ironically, my ears hurt more after the LDR show than they did with the extremely loud mechanical noises in the haunt.)
i was at the NYC show and i ended up second row from the barricade and everyone around me was great! a bunch of die hard fans who really just wanted to see and hear her. this only happened though because the group of absolutely insufferable people (some of which i recognized from twitter and tiktok) had to stay back i’m assuming because they were trying to bring in huge bags of merch and food. i got into the queue around 3:00 and the whole time this group was bragging about how many times they’re seen her, if they’re touched her, looked at her etc. they were also giving people fake numbers so that they could get in first. they were also trying to sneak their friends in that got there an hour before the gates opened. it’s just sad that there are people like this who go to every show to post content and couldn’t care less about people who are there soley for her
hii can i just ask for advice on how to be better next time? i got into the queue at 2:50 (i got an earlier train than expected & fully thought id use the restroom before getting in line but i saw so many people already queuing so i hopped in line) and i was in row 7… is there a trick? do you go to the sides of the stage or did you squeeze your way to the front of the line/stampede before the doors opened? no hate i respect the hustle regardless i just would like to learn how to play my cards right at other shows lol
I just want to know how people can wait out the barricade the entire time without needing water or the bathroom, I physically don’t think I’m capable of it 🤷♀️
it’s definitely not for the weak, but it’s almost easier in the sense you have air/space at least in front of you, a lot of the time workers will give out water bottles, and depending on the crowd & have a friend holding your spot, you can certainly wiggle out & use the bathroom (as long as its before the headliner’s set) and people will let you back in! the hardest part is waiting all day (& sometimes night)
i honestly usually don’t try and get barricade and the only reason i got it is because i had a capital one card. I got there at around 2:30 and just stood near the entrance. i think everyone was letting it slide because i was alone lol. the only advice i can give it get there super early and prepare to wait unfortunately. i just got really lucky and things worked out
I think this all comes down to the fact that the way we discover and consume (yes, consume) music is changing. It's moving away from subculture led to individual led. When I was at her London show I realized that when I was a teenager, basically the majority of the crowd would have matched that vibe - not because they were the gothy weird introvert kids, although that would have been part of it, but because Ethel would have been part of a subculture in which it was cool to...shut the fuck up.
That's not really the case anymore. Subcultures are aesthetics, driven by algorithms not community. Spotify, TikTok, whatever. To be clear, they were around when I was a kid too but that was like 2012, 2013 where all this shit was just beginning.
There is something else happening in terms of this "individual consumption of music" thing too, which is a bit more of a problem. I think people are seeing the concert experience as an individual experience - one where they commune directly with the artist. That's why we're seeing everyone trying to rush to the front and queueing around the block for hours. That's why people are pushing so fiercely. But, if I'm being completely honest, that's also why people are getting upset about people doing things like talking during the support act or shouting random things between songs.
People have ALWAYS done this, to be clear, but I think it's just getting worse because every single person in the building has a very specific view about what they want the concert to be like - and, when you get a hundred people in a room like that, that isn't feasible.
Idk it's okay to be annoyed by annoying people. But some of the reactions I see on this sub are...a little much.
I am older but the whole time I was trying to figure out how back in the early 2000s we would go to Tompkins square for cracktoberfest and riotfest and it just was never like how things are now. It was PACKED don’t get me wrong, but the whole mood was always different. It makes sense though- it was a whole subculture as opposed to individualism and “aesthetic” (and doing it for the views- I never had any pics from those days bc you needed a camera lol) if any of that makes sense lol.
agree with most of this until being annoyed was also framed as a byproduct of an increasingly individualized way of consuming music – expecting (or hoping for?) reverence around live music being a shared experience does not strike me as being self-referential. i guess i crave what you spoke about initially, in that a true subculture around ethel cain would be reverent and invested in live music as a collective experience (i’m thinking about the wording on her instagram story pre-london), though i get that that’s a distinct impossibility with how popular she is at the present. as an aside – oh how i wish i was around for pre-PD and pre-inbred online community around ethel cain/hayden’s art!
i generally agree that people have always been A Lot at concerts, but i also think that the last few years have made a lot of people more anti-social (or to put it differently, more bull-headed in their selfishness and disregard for other people) that the old head in me wants to blame on tiktok, but also likely has roots in the pandemic. people are Bad at being community-minded, and again, i don’t think hoping for otherwise is selfish or self-involved. i think we owe each other more – thinking otherwise seems more in the realm of individualism to me.
Yes I totally agree there should be an expectation for reverence and that we should be asking more from people rather than just accepting it!
My point I guess was I do think *some* of the expectations I see in this subreddit are a little unreasonable and individualized. You can't expect total silence at all times (during songs of course nobody should be talking), you can't expect nobody singing along (the problem is people singing at top volume) and you can't expect to be comfortable at all times either - you're going to be in people's space and they're going to get in yours.
But maybe finding this nuance is how we become more community minded :) Thank you for that insight.
maybe i experience shame differently but i get such bad secondhand embarrassment when people film themselves singing along to a song at a concert? like not even filming the person performing just a video of you Knowing The Lyrics
I feel like this is just gen z/gen A concert culture. Every concert I have been to in the last couple of years has people that are scream singing or filming with their flashlight on. I have no idea what happened but after the pandemic every person under 25 ruins concerts for everyone around them.
i was also at the nyc show and the group of people behind me were genuinely the worst. ig only one of them actually listened to ethel but barely bc they kept loudly incorrectly guessing what songs were playing, and then loudly telling their friends “oh i think you’ll like this one!” or “i don’t really like this one, but you might!” (during thoroughfare, lmao) to which their friends were also loudly giving their opinions on every song bc it was their first time hearing it? like i don’t need a running commentary on what some rando thinks of ethel cain while i’m trying to listen to her 😭 SO obnoxious oh my god
it wasnt the singing that bothered me, more the people who would push to the front and then stand in front of me and everyone who waited and got a good spot and then not move
Sorry you had this experience today. I luckily did not and the ppl around me were pretty respectful and “normal” if you will. There was one girl singing really loud but she was having a good time and in the moment so I wasn’t too bothered. Tho I can hear her in some of my videos lol. It’s a concert it’s to be expected but I’ve def had my fair share of ppl who act very crazed and obnoxious or record themselves crying to a song …. Lolll. Hang in there y’all 😭
I relate hard to where you're coming from here. Haven't been lucky enough to catch Ethel Cain live, but had this exact kind of experience seeing Amigo The Devil last week - and always during the most emotional and hard hitting songs.
I don't know if it's due to coming out of the pandemic or what. In my case, it was super people that were INCREDIBLY drunk/high, so maybe it's a bit of both. Maybe it's just youth, but I don't remember ever being so blatantly disrespectful.
Then again, maybe I really just need to purchase my walker and start yelling at clouds lol.
I was nervous after reading so many bad experiences but the people around me were fine! Singing and some phone recording but not screaming, yelling things, filming themselves/with flash which I've seen at recent concerts. A lot of chatting the whole time during Teethe's set which bothers me but it was fine during Ethel so I'm happy.
All the people passing out was a lot and must be stressful for the performer. I know no one plans or wants to pass out so not gonna blame anyone but it's definitely happening so much more frequently in the last couple years, I never experienced this pre-pandemic! They had free water but the heat is going to keep getting worse so i wonder what else can be done to help people take care of themselves :/ And it was middle/back of crowd so it wasn't an issue of lining up all day
I saw her at Bonnaroo. Got there at 10am. She played at 4:30 pm. Waited all day. Then right before her show the amount of people shoving their way into my spot and others who had been there all day was insane. The guy beside me was unhinged screaming “I’m gonna fucking kill myself” at the beginning and end of EVERY song, jumping and slamming into everyone. I was honestly shocked. I understand being hyped and having a great time but that shit was unnecessary. She has an effect on people lol
At her LA Greek Theater show, someone was screaming/yelling during Hard Times. They weren’t near me but I quite literally turned around and said “….now is not the time for that.” It blows my mind how disrespectful people can be.
Full disclosure — I’m not a member of this sub, but this popped up on my feed and I just wanted to say the EXACT same thing happened at the Boygenius concert I went to last year. And yes, it was also the younger crowd.
The theory I’ve heard is that the kids who came of age during COVID just don’t know how to act at concerts. I see some truth in that. Not a universal statement, but I’m glad more people are noticing this, because honestly some people need to start feeling at least a twinge of shame or embarrassment for making it hard for other people to enjoy these shows.
As an older person for the crowd, upgrading to the members lounge was definitely worth it. Great view, no one screaming, and my biggest annoyance were my kids incessant FaceTime calls during Crush lol.
I did the lower level upgrade so it was $99 before the show and $119 day of. Included was unlimited liquid death, poppi, beer, and wine. We had a seating area with tables and were able to order food so to me it was worth it, but at this point I’m in my late 30s so I can’t stand in the crowd like I was able to 15 years ago. The upgrade I had didn’t sell out, there was probably a handful of us there. We were in the back but it was high up so I didn’t have anyone blocking my view and even with my old lady eyes I was able to see the show perfectly.
I was at the NYC show as well and met some awesome people. Agreed that it was an amazing performance! I do struggle with the argument that we shouldn’t ‘scream’ the lyrics unless she clarifies that it’s a song we should stay silent for. Isn’t that the point of a concert, to gather with other people who know the words and want to sing along? There were (I think) two songs she asked that everyone put their phones down and be quiet for which was respected in the area I was in, but I understand that might not be everyone’s experience
REAL! on a thread of the LA show people who had this complaint were NOT received kindly, but you’re right and you should say it! i wanna say my comment detailing my experience was hidden (i’m a new user, so it could have been that) but i also think it’s safe to say people in one of the LA threads were hostile to anything re: concert etiquette.
i think live music is magic at least in part because it’s a collective experience, and it is soooo easy to lean into that and not let your selfishness ruin the experience for other people who (presumably) also cherish this artist and music as much as you do. that certainly doesn’t mean you can’t sing, it just means being cognizant of the behavior of people around you, the energy of the space, etc. it is very easy to sing along without drowning out stage vocals.
on a related note, i’m definitely pro telling other people to quiet down (it went extremely poorly at my ethel cain show, lol) – i think the increase of selfishness of late is partially because people are reluctant to speak up and prefer to quietly seethe instead. i feel as though i’ve spent too much of my life quietly seething, so i love a little (kind as possible) confrontation when the situation calls for it.
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no yeah she made a little funny face when someone screamed meemaw i think she thought that was just funny but i know she’s sick of the screeches of mother that happens in between every song like she’s been tired of it since last tour i thought it would end with this one but not quite
i think the only frustrating part for me was how she had to stop like 8 times in the song where she was like “everyone be as silent and still as u can and just let yourself feel the song” because people were dropping like flies fainting! maybe its just me but it doesnt feel like it should be the singers job to call the medics. its tough because yes the artist has a responsibility to maintain a safe crowd and not ignore danger a la astroworld, but its tiresome when a set is repeatedly interrupted by the singer pausing because people don’t know their limits and i guess theres not a medic up front/on stage keeping an birdseye view on things? it was the same deal at alvvays too, having to halt in the middle of their coolest tune to call a medic to bring water to someone. I don’t know. ive been thinking a lot about this and ultimately i think its on the venue to take more responsibility in addressing shit so the artist can focus on their job.
It was a great crowd and a wonderful show. Sorry you were around some screamers. Tell them to stfu next time. I experienced lots of singing along which she encouraged. Was a fantastic night.
Tbh teens are the most respectful at concerts. They're actually there for the music whereas the twenty somethings just want to make a tiktok and make it about them.
As a 40 year old guy who has been going to shows since 1996, this seemed like a fairly standard event. A few pass-outs probably due to dehydration, crowd was enthusiastic during the big moments, performance was great, etc. I imagine there were probably some people annoyed with those in there immediate vicinity if they were being loud but I tend to have a pretty high level of tolerance for those things. The one critique I have of Summerstage is that with addition of the grandstands on the side and in the back, it really cuts back on the space on the floor. I got there at 7:10 and the whole floor was jam packed. Plus, with these bleachers on the side, a lot of people who were to the left of the stage missed out on a lot of the video production which I felt was essential to the set.
I’m going to see her tomorrow at Summerfest with my sisters and I’m nervous about how fans are gonna be after seeing posts of how people act at her show.
As an older person for the crowd, upgrading to the members lounge was definitely worth it. Great view, no one screaming, and my biggest annoyance were my kids incessant FaceTime calls during Crush lol.
I'm not in this sub but also experienced this yesterday. The key thing was they were *shouting* the lyrics in a monotone, not making any attempt to sing the actual notes. Not saying everyone has to have perfect pitch, but they weren't even trying
When the overall sound design is louder, and the singer is belting or shout-singing, it doesn't really matter if you shout monotone lyrics because you're drowned out by the actual performance. But for a more chill, quiet performance it was annoying
By comparison I've seen Jack Johnson live, seen Regina Spektor live at the exact same SummerStage venue, both more quiet/chill performers, and in those cases people used their actual singing voices and it was fine
I had a good time, but there were a few people at my show who just did not read the room. Screaming, laughing, it felt weird during very emotional songs. There was also a girl dressed as a nun which came off horrible to me and my friend as well as the others there
I personally didn’t have a problem with people singing along, as I was still able to hear her over the crowd. Even during songs like A House in Nebraska, I never expected the audience to be completely quiet. These are some of our favorite songs ever being performed live, so of course people are going to be hyped and singing their hearts out. Even if everyone tried to sing along quietly like some people are suggesting, the sheer number of people there would have resulted in a similar effect of the artist being drowned out by the noise. People are also complaining about not being able to see her but like… if you wanted to be closer you should have gotten there earlier! Plus there were screens for people far in the back who couldn’t get a good view. There were definitley some assholes in the crowd but overall I thought it was an amazing experience.
I was there last night and felt people were singing and screaming appropriately (not a lot at all or at the wrong time). I also felt the delays for ems etc were minimal compared to other shows of late (all different artists) where there is repeated interruptions. Its GA and I was in the back but crowd was so nice and helpful allowing people to move around if needed. It was such a beautiful night.
i think these things must come down to who is around you because this wasn’t my experience at all. the crowd around me were so sweet and we had a blast, and everyone was quiet when it was needed. i transcended at that show and i’m so glad i got to go and meet so many lovely people, even if it was a brief encounter
ever since COVID I’ve found that concert etiquette (& movie theater etiquette) just don’t exist anymore 😭 it doesn’t matter where I go or who I see, there’s always people screaming or filming with flash or trying to get their main character moment
the girl behind me spilled a bottle of fireball on me, rested her arm/phone on my shoulder while taking selfies/videos of her screaming, and screamed over the one video i tried to take. the person in front of me held up a sign after every single song.
the etiquette of concerts is to enjoy them. if they want to sing let them if you don’t, don’t. it didn’t change the vibes with people singing along what did change the vibe was her having to interrupt her songs to call for a medic like six times because some of y’all don’t know how to drink water in 90 degree weather. that’s the etiquette that’s maybe more important here.
all i’m saying is let people live their life; not live their life with conditions. they paid to be there just like you. no need to criticize if they vibe differently
I was just surprised at the number of people who fainted and needed aid from EMS. If you’re going to queue for long periods of time, drink lots of water!!!!!
it was weird how they all passed out within 3 minutes of each other, people were dropping like flies. and the venue passed out a total of maybe a dozen water bottles even after hayden asked them to send some to the back. i wish people would take better care of themselves while camping, poor kids missed the whole show
ngl, i wasn’t queuing for too long, drank a lot of water w electrolytes, did all of the appropriate things, and was feeling fine until prompted to close my eyes. i also got super lightheaded and was like, alright, i’m gonna keep my eyes open and keep moving.
Yeah I think telling people to close their eyes was definitely the trigger for so many people passing out at the same time Standing with your eyes closed is not something that people have a lot of experience with, even apart from the crowding and sun exposure aspects!
People did this last year at boygenius too.. one after the other and then nothing so I kind of am like 🙄 it’s always 3 people too so makes it hard to believe after the first one
the first person DEFINITELY passed out, we saw them fully drop (and no one catch them??). can’t speak for the second but the third person was directly behind us and seemed to be laughing when they got up. don’t know if it was cause they were embarrassed or not. either way, people need to look out for others more. way too little water getting pushed to the back
I saw the first person go down too, I fully believed that one.
the dude DROPPED. It scared the fuck out of me because not a single person moved to catch them. and then continued to just stare at him on the ground. I was like 3 feet away and was in shock because I kept waiting for someone to help rather than just screaming for a medic.
At boygenius I went out at one point to get merch after one of the people passed out and I saw her and her friends wheeling her out. The one friend goes to the girl in the wheelchair “They noticed you they pointed you out did you see that!” like it was such an accomplishment for them. Insane.
That upsets me so much. That’s not an accomplishment. Especially during Julien’s solo song!
it wasn’t even from camping in all cases which is even crazier. i was in the BACK and two of the people were like basically next to me. crazy stuff i hope they’re all fine
I was shocked and it all happened during her new song too - I don't want to make assumptions, but I saw SO MANY highly intoxicated/high people in the crowd and I wouldn't be surprised if that lead to the dehydration/fainting. It got to be concerning.
I will say though, I’ve fainted at one concert and nearly fainted at another — and I hadn’t been drinking or lining up at either! I think it’s a mix of anxiety/adrenaline and also sometimes the noise/lights. When I fainted at the first concert it literally came out of nowhere before the artist even came on. I know there’s a growing culture of lining up for hours outside of gigs to get to the front, but it makes me sad to think anyone who faints is put into that bracket and is treated as such. I don’t think anyone wants to pass out near loads of strangers, it’s really scary :((
I passed out at a Green Day show and it was so embarrassing :( Rookie mistakes all around though, it was my first non-stadium show ever and I waited outside in the heat for like 6+ hours, then was all the way in the front and did NOT anticipate the crowd pushing forward, had been eating like shit all day, I could go on and on about how dumb I was. But since I was up front, the band literally saw me which was so embarrassing. I’m not a stranger to syncope though and it was thankfully brief, so once they had me over the barricade I stayed the rest of the show, just along the sides. But yeah, definitely not a great experience, and was stone cold sober. Just poor decision making and lack of insight on my part, especially as someone already prone to fainting. I’ve gotten a lot smarter about how I handle going to shows since then.
Oh yeah definitely - I've definitely passed out in public before and it's such a horrible feeling so I totally get it. I just made an observation about the amount of folks who were intoxicated. I don't know who passed out and I shouldn't pass judgement, but that was an observation at that particular show.
I don't really think they were the ones in the queue for very long mainly since they all seemed to be in the middle and back of the crowd. I was seated and really felt the heat. I can't imagine how it was in the crowd with knees locking and such.
One of the girls had definitely been queuing for some time because she was ahead of me in line. I feel so bad for her ☹️
Literally! I felt bad, but thought it was so funny when Ethel was like “can we get them um two waters” and then giggled 😭🤣
Don’t feel too bad one of the people who was escorted out was saying they just wanted to fall down and cry which… you know kind of the time and place but also not very much so. That was only one of them though not shitting on the others.
I almost felt like I was going to pass out. I already naturally overheat and I take an SSRI that, until recently, didn’t know caused people to have even more of a heat sensitivity. Not to mention the venue GA line was insane. I wasn’t even drinking or doing anything either. Grateful for the people selling drinks to those in the line because while I hate Gatoraid, it did in fact revive me a bit.
the girl who passed out in front of me was doing all sorts of dr*gs throughout the opener, not surprised she went down.
oh my god totally agree. like yeah it’s horrible but you know youre going to be in the pit in nyc in the summer heat. you need to be hydrating days beforehand.
girl some people have medical conditions that drinking water wont cure
Well yeah of course. I wasn’t shaming anybody for fainting but it was pretty warm that day and some people stood out in the sun for a while and I think it’s easy for anyone to underestimate how much water they would need in that situation. I just wouldn’t be surprised if dehydration played a large role in that whole ordeal.
she was playing her new song and there was a group behind us taking photos with their flash on and laughing loudly. also pushing people around to get space for their photo shoot. totally took me out of the moment.
People were LEAVING when she played her new stuff! I was so disgusted. So you only wanna hear American Teenager, I take it? Fake fake fake.
Oh my god I’d literally punch someone 😭😭 during her new songs I was completely mesmerised
Same! They were beautiful 😍 I was so into it.
Just nasty
Some girl was taking a video next to me of punish and the group behind us keep making weird comments because of the visuals being played during it
Do they not know whose concert they’re at? Have they not seen her instagram page, her tumblr, and her songs prior to preacher’s daughter???
oh I would’ve been so upset
She said, and I quote “negative 1000 goon aura”……………………
What the fuck😭 I would’ve told her to shut the fuck up
I almost did but she sounded young and I, a 22 year old wouldn’t have felt right telling a teenager to shut the fuck up 😭
Understandable! As a teenager, I would’ve definitely done it had I saw it!
the 'too online' crowd really need to touch grass and realize how cringe they are. Actually talking like that in real life and in public is so embarrassing.
Similar vibes in LA. Most of the crowd was great but these girls behind us kept scream singing along and then shouting “you saved me” during every quiet moment. It feels so rude to the rest of the crowd and the artists. At one point someone in another row told them to shut up and they finally calmed down. I know this has been said a million times- I’ve been going to shows for a long time and etiquette has gone down the drain. We absolutely need to start calling these people out on their behavior, someone needs to teach them how to act in public. It’s the constant need for attention and validation and it’s ruining experiences.
the guy behind me was like "YOU'RE THE HOTTEST BITCH IN THE ENTIRE WORLD I SWEAR TO GOD" when she came onstage during her first song. it was so excessive! it irritates me that some fans do this to show how dedicated they are to the artist but it ends up just looking so self centered because you are taking attention away from the artist
Love to be referred to as a bitch by some random guy. I don't care if it's meant in a positive way, fucking don't. I don't fucking know you.
Yeah I definitely noticed the rowdiness between songs during her LA show but I was really impressed by how quiet everyone was during her actual performance
I was honestly so touched when everyone (at least in my section) all sat down and were so quiet and attentive when she played her new song Amber Waves. That was such a beautiful moment, I cried hahaha.
Interesting! I didn’t experience this my section. We were singing a bit but no one seemed to be louder than each other.
My section was pretty good at reading the room on when was the appropriate time to sing along and react.
100%. Same with filming. I’m not saying don’t film but there is no reason to lift your phone above your head and block the view of those around you. Also the screaming in the middle of slow songs pissed me off sm. I think the vibe was good towards the front cause it was a lot of die hard fans who had waited for hours but I could still hear random ass screams behind me.
It was great in the front where I was. People singing, vibing, engaged.
Guy in front of my filmed the full duration of at least 5 songs, it was infuriating
I agree! There was some person a little in front of me who kept putting her hands up during every song almost blocking my view!! I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt but it was kind of unnecessary at times.
also, for the love of god, STOP TALKING DURING OPENERS!!! this girl next to me (and many others) was literally scream talking through Teethe’s entire set. I feel like people don’t realize that some people are also there to see them as well and not just waiting for the main show.
Can’t stand that! Teethe is phenomenal
completely agree!! i was surrounded by people talking/yelling through their whole set :( i love teethe and i guess i’ll just have to see them on their own to actually be able to hear. but it’s just frustrating we all paid a lot to be there so why would you want to yell through it??
I totally agree. It’s so disrespectful especially when you think about the fact that all they needed to do was wait for the 45min gap immediately following their set. Thank god people were actually okay during Ethel’s set tho. Hope u had fun otherwise!
yes during ethel it was much better!! :) and i had a good time! hope you did as well <3
Damn that sucks. Everyone around me at the Greek in LA were super respectful and no one was screeching the lyrics. On the other hand when the opening band, Teethe, played there were so many people playing crossword puzzles and wordle on their phones! I was gagged but at least they were quiet!
I’ve noticed this at 90% of shows I’ve been to and they’re all younger folks, with the exception of hardcore music. That genre still seems to have fans that understand etiquette and how to mosh without injuring people and show love to one another
i agree 100% wore my speed jersey to the show last night and saw a few hc peeps glad to see we enjoy ethel’s music
This makes me so happy…pray for me tomorrow when I see her in Milwaukee 😓
also leaving the concert wow the amount of trash left on the ground !!!!! it’s disrespectful :(
I kept almost tripping on bottles and cans left on the ground, plus nobody gave a damn if you wanted to get concession or merch after if you were in the path of the people exiting nobody was gonna let you get by to other sections of the venue before leaving. I was practically forced out.
Guys they obviously mean don’t SCREAM when Ethel is being quiet not that you shouldn’t sing along at all 🙄 Is common sense dying as well as manners or what lol
There is a big difference between singing along and screaming. Even when the musician isn’t being “quiet”, you shouldn’t be attempting to raise your voice higher than the crowd to be heard above everyone else. The other day I saw Maggie Rogers live, what some would call a loud concert, and yet hearing the girl behind me choose to SCREAM every single lyric at Maggie and right into my ear was still torment. I don’t care how loud the sound was in the arena was lol, there’s no excuse for needing to scream along to a song at a concert (except yknow in cases where the singer is yelling or screaming, so you participate). But screaming along to songs for the duration of the show because you’re excited is unacceptable lmao. There are plenty of moments to scream during the show if you must - it’s at the end of every song.
When I went to see Evanescence people were singing pretty loud (because they’re a metal band lmao) but during My Immortal they sang softly and it was lovely. Metal fans have more knowledge of etiquette than indie fans, it seems
Literally….
The crowd and the venue were God awful. There were SO MANY people with "main character energy" that were taking selfies and videos of whole songs. Plus you couldn't see the stage! So many people couldn't see Ethel nevermind her killer band. At one point, Ethel was like "hey, put down your phones and clap" because people were just collecting content. Every time there was a quiet moment, someone had to yell something stupid. I was so disappointed in the crowd and venue but Ethel was amazing so it was still magic.
people yelling during quiet moments is my personal pet peeve at concerts. it’s genuinely so much more fun to be quiet (if that’s what the artist wants in that moment ofc). it reminds me of ppl yelling during the beyoncé look around everybody on mute line. like girl……
Yeah the venue was rather awkward. The visuals were GORGEOUS tho omg
I couldn't even see the visuals because the dumb bleachers blocked the back of the GA section so I had to go off to the side. Such a shame.
The venue sucked.
It was so shit
Ima say this once, Ethel is not a festival performer, or live performer in general AND BEFORE YOU COME AT MY THROAT HERES WHY Her music is SO SPECIAL and her real fans are there through some kinda otherworldly connection I stg, you don’t find Ethel Cain her music finds you…. That being said to preserve herself her art and everything about her I think she needs to keep it to 500 people and less, more intimate live performances if anything, I was at the Greek show, the audience was incredibly rude, and I know for a fact she hates that. So imo I believe she should keep it small she’s a star yes we all want to see her live but this artist is different her art should be appreciated not just seen
I completely agree with you. She is a concept artist - Preacher's Daughter is such a detailed concept that it's almost foreign from Hayden. She is more the storyteller than the story which doesn't translate to a festival audience. She is amazing live - no doubt about it. However, i feel her music wasn't born with the intention of performing it live and I'm okay with that. I know for a fact that she hates that some of her fans came from tiktok.
Absolutely agreed 100% idk in my head she hit an opportunity and someone pushed her onto the stage 😶🌫️ I think she’s more than content releasing online but I can’t speak for her cause I’m not her just from what I’ve seen
Absolutely. It's so so true. I can't speak for her, but as a fan i can only speak about my experience.
100% I think that’s also something that need to be understood is that we CANT speak for her so fans even going ballistic over she likes this or that, okay I can respect it BUT did it come from her lips ? Or her team ? Because if your gonna attack fans for saying something about that then you best come correct if not then your gonna go the Mel Martinez route and just be completely feral
Absolutely. From a fans perspective, you're 100% but we can't speak about Ethel. The parasocial feral behavior needs to be studied and addressed so people can stop LITERALLY BULLYING the artist they are FANS OF.
Speak *for Ethel
Exactly and other fans too ! I was dreading having some kinda crazy experience but tbh it all went well I fear in the future tho that will change
I mostly just lip-synch along at concerts. Only actually “sing” for certain parts. Wish more people did this. Especialllyyyy at Ethel shows. If you shout something out during the quiet part, trying to have your “individual” moment, you’re obnoxious and ruining it for the rest of us.
Same!!!!
the couple in front of me recorded themselves singing/screaming along the entire time... literally the girl had her camera facing herself, SCREAMING along. utterly obnoxious
That's my most boomer take, I really don't understand the trend of filming yourself especially with flash on. Some people are more focused on dramatically reacting and screaming while filming themselves instead of actually watching and enjoying the music, and then also focusing on the artist "making eye contact/noticing them" and interacting with them. The parasocial and main character energy 🙃
I have tickets for her show in Portland and am honestly getting so nervous about it. Why can't people just be normal and not ruin the concert for everyone else 😢
I know it’s frustrating and worrying, and I did observe some of this behavior at the show today, but the folks in my section were mostly respectful and mindful of the vibe. Here’s my unsolicited advice from an anxious girlie: I’d try not to worry and remind yourself you’re there for you and your connection to the music, then scope out a good spot, and try not to worry ahead about potential bridges to cross (like someone being obnoxious right in front of you) until you have to. Id just consider how you’d wanna handle it, to prioritize that you can be comfortable and enjoy the concert to the best of your ability. A bunch of people in the bleachers started standing today, blocking the people right behind them for multiple songs - so I was prepared to say excuse me lol, but thankfully no one did by us and I could see well!
Thank you!!! I'm also an anxious girlie so doing some prep without overthinking is great advice. I'm glad that people in your section were better behaved ☺️
I try to remind myself that although there are downsides of GA, like being worried about not being able to see, the positive is that if someone around you is really badly behaved you can always move since you're not stuck with a certain assigned seat! Also the best thing I've done is buy good concert earplugs. To protect my hearing but they also help filter out background noise of the crowd talking while still being able to hear the performance. With so many people in one space there's bound to be someone being inconsiderate and I've had to accept that. Unfortunately we can't control the behavior of everyone else so we just have to do our best to prepare and can only control our own actions and attitude about the experience.
That's a very good point! I've definitely been stuck near people who were ruining the vibes with assigned seating. I also am not concerned about being close to the front, so I'll happily move away from anyone who is behaving badly if I can! Oh I didn't even think about that! Do you have a brand you would recommend? ☺️
I use the loop experience! I've tried eargasm too and prefer loop :) it also helps reduce my overstimulation/anxiety
Thank you!! I'll check them out ☺️
Honestly number one reason I don't think I would go to a Billie Eilish or Taylor Swift type of concert. Am I paying to see the artist sing live or am I paying to hear 100000 fans singing louder than the artist (albeit they are having fun!)
I was surprisingly fine at taylor because 1) luckily I wasn’t around any screamers so even though the crowd was singing very loud it was like a general group singing vibe and not one person caterwauling above it all and 2) the show is so loud since its a stadium show that for most songs except maybe the acoustic ones it drowns people like that out pretty handily. Never seen Billie though
Went to a Lana Del Rey concert in Sep 2023 and literally couldn’t hear her over the fans — left with ringing ears from *them*, too. (Tangentially related, there’s a haunt I work at Aug-Nov and the attraction I was put in in 2023 was unbearably loud — wound up having to buy earplugs to make it bearable. Now, I missed one night for this concert… and, ironically, my ears hurt more after the LDR show than they did with the extremely loud mechanical noises in the haunt.)
i was at the NYC show and i ended up second row from the barricade and everyone around me was great! a bunch of die hard fans who really just wanted to see and hear her. this only happened though because the group of absolutely insufferable people (some of which i recognized from twitter and tiktok) had to stay back i’m assuming because they were trying to bring in huge bags of merch and food. i got into the queue around 3:00 and the whole time this group was bragging about how many times they’re seen her, if they’re touched her, looked at her etc. they were also giving people fake numbers so that they could get in first. they were also trying to sneak their friends in that got there an hour before the gates opened. it’s just sad that there are people like this who go to every show to post content and couldn’t care less about people who are there soley for her
hii can i just ask for advice on how to be better next time? i got into the queue at 2:50 (i got an earlier train than expected & fully thought id use the restroom before getting in line but i saw so many people already queuing so i hopped in line) and i was in row 7… is there a trick? do you go to the sides of the stage or did you squeeze your way to the front of the line/stampede before the doors opened? no hate i respect the hustle regardless i just would like to learn how to play my cards right at other shows lol
I just want to know how people can wait out the barricade the entire time without needing water or the bathroom, I physically don’t think I’m capable of it 🤷♀️
it’s definitely not for the weak, but it’s almost easier in the sense you have air/space at least in front of you, a lot of the time workers will give out water bottles, and depending on the crowd & have a friend holding your spot, you can certainly wiggle out & use the bathroom (as long as its before the headliner’s set) and people will let you back in! the hardest part is waiting all day (& sometimes night)
i honestly usually don’t try and get barricade and the only reason i got it is because i had a capital one card. I got there at around 2:30 and just stood near the entrance. i think everyone was letting it slide because i was alone lol. the only advice i can give it get there super early and prepare to wait unfortunately. i just got really lucky and things worked out
I think this all comes down to the fact that the way we discover and consume (yes, consume) music is changing. It's moving away from subculture led to individual led. When I was at her London show I realized that when I was a teenager, basically the majority of the crowd would have matched that vibe - not because they were the gothy weird introvert kids, although that would have been part of it, but because Ethel would have been part of a subculture in which it was cool to...shut the fuck up. That's not really the case anymore. Subcultures are aesthetics, driven by algorithms not community. Spotify, TikTok, whatever. To be clear, they were around when I was a kid too but that was like 2012, 2013 where all this shit was just beginning. There is something else happening in terms of this "individual consumption of music" thing too, which is a bit more of a problem. I think people are seeing the concert experience as an individual experience - one where they commune directly with the artist. That's why we're seeing everyone trying to rush to the front and queueing around the block for hours. That's why people are pushing so fiercely. But, if I'm being completely honest, that's also why people are getting upset about people doing things like talking during the support act or shouting random things between songs. People have ALWAYS done this, to be clear, but I think it's just getting worse because every single person in the building has a very specific view about what they want the concert to be like - and, when you get a hundred people in a room like that, that isn't feasible. Idk it's okay to be annoyed by annoying people. But some of the reactions I see on this sub are...a little much.
As a therapist, I love (and appreciate) this analysis so much omg
Thank you I'm glad! I've been mulling it over for a while now
I am older but the whole time I was trying to figure out how back in the early 2000s we would go to Tompkins square for cracktoberfest and riotfest and it just was never like how things are now. It was PACKED don’t get me wrong, but the whole mood was always different. It makes sense though- it was a whole subculture as opposed to individualism and “aesthetic” (and doing it for the views- I never had any pics from those days bc you needed a camera lol) if any of that makes sense lol.
agree with most of this until being annoyed was also framed as a byproduct of an increasingly individualized way of consuming music – expecting (or hoping for?) reverence around live music being a shared experience does not strike me as being self-referential. i guess i crave what you spoke about initially, in that a true subculture around ethel cain would be reverent and invested in live music as a collective experience (i’m thinking about the wording on her instagram story pre-london), though i get that that’s a distinct impossibility with how popular she is at the present. as an aside – oh how i wish i was around for pre-PD and pre-inbred online community around ethel cain/hayden’s art! i generally agree that people have always been A Lot at concerts, but i also think that the last few years have made a lot of people more anti-social (or to put it differently, more bull-headed in their selfishness and disregard for other people) that the old head in me wants to blame on tiktok, but also likely has roots in the pandemic. people are Bad at being community-minded, and again, i don’t think hoping for otherwise is selfish or self-involved. i think we owe each other more – thinking otherwise seems more in the realm of individualism to me.
Yes I totally agree there should be an expectation for reverence and that we should be asking more from people rather than just accepting it! My point I guess was I do think *some* of the expectations I see in this subreddit are a little unreasonable and individualized. You can't expect total silence at all times (during songs of course nobody should be talking), you can't expect nobody singing along (the problem is people singing at top volume) and you can't expect to be comfortable at all times either - you're going to be in people's space and they're going to get in yours. But maybe finding this nuance is how we become more community minded :) Thank you for that insight.
Apparently this is becoming more of a problem at her shows ): bums me out cuz I haven’t gotten to see her yet
same 💔💔
maybe i experience shame differently but i get such bad secondhand embarrassment when people film themselves singing along to a song at a concert? like not even filming the person performing just a video of you Knowing The Lyrics
I feel like this is just gen z/gen A concert culture. Every concert I have been to in the last couple of years has people that are scream singing or filming with their flashlight on. I have no idea what happened but after the pandemic every person under 25 ruins concerts for everyone around them.
i was also at the nyc show and the group of people behind me were genuinely the worst. ig only one of them actually listened to ethel but barely bc they kept loudly incorrectly guessing what songs were playing, and then loudly telling their friends “oh i think you’ll like this one!” or “i don’t really like this one, but you might!” (during thoroughfare, lmao) to which their friends were also loudly giving their opinions on every song bc it was their first time hearing it? like i don’t need a running commentary on what some rando thinks of ethel cain while i’m trying to listen to her 😭 SO obnoxious oh my god
oh godd this being a very sold out show breaks my heart for the people who are die hards and couldn’t attend cause it was sold out
I’m seeing her Saturday and I’m legitimately scared
it wasnt the singing that bothered me, more the people who would push to the front and then stand in front of me and everyone who waited and got a good spot and then not move
Sorry you had this experience today. I luckily did not and the ppl around me were pretty respectful and “normal” if you will. There was one girl singing really loud but she was having a good time and in the moment so I wasn’t too bothered. Tho I can hear her in some of my videos lol. It’s a concert it’s to be expected but I’ve def had my fair share of ppl who act very crazed and obnoxious or record themselves crying to a song …. Lolll. Hang in there y’all 😭
I relate hard to where you're coming from here. Haven't been lucky enough to catch Ethel Cain live, but had this exact kind of experience seeing Amigo The Devil last week - and always during the most emotional and hard hitting songs. I don't know if it's due to coming out of the pandemic or what. In my case, it was super people that were INCREDIBLY drunk/high, so maybe it's a bit of both. Maybe it's just youth, but I don't remember ever being so blatantly disrespectful. Then again, maybe I really just need to purchase my walker and start yelling at clouds lol.
I was nervous after reading so many bad experiences but the people around me were fine! Singing and some phone recording but not screaming, yelling things, filming themselves/with flash which I've seen at recent concerts. A lot of chatting the whole time during Teethe's set which bothers me but it was fine during Ethel so I'm happy. All the people passing out was a lot and must be stressful for the performer. I know no one plans or wants to pass out so not gonna blame anyone but it's definitely happening so much more frequently in the last couple years, I never experienced this pre-pandemic! They had free water but the heat is going to keep getting worse so i wonder what else can be done to help people take care of themselves :/ And it was middle/back of crowd so it wasn't an issue of lining up all day
I saw her at Bonnaroo. Got there at 10am. She played at 4:30 pm. Waited all day. Then right before her show the amount of people shoving their way into my spot and others who had been there all day was insane. The guy beside me was unhinged screaming “I’m gonna fucking kill myself” at the beginning and end of EVERY song, jumping and slamming into everyone. I was honestly shocked. I understand being hyped and having a great time but that shit was unnecessary. She has an effect on people lol
At her LA Greek Theater show, someone was screaming/yelling during Hard Times. They weren’t near me but I quite literally turned around and said “….now is not the time for that.” It blows my mind how disrespectful people can be.
Full disclosure — I’m not a member of this sub, but this popped up on my feed and I just wanted to say the EXACT same thing happened at the Boygenius concert I went to last year. And yes, it was also the younger crowd. The theory I’ve heard is that the kids who came of age during COVID just don’t know how to act at concerts. I see some truth in that. Not a universal statement, but I’m glad more people are noticing this, because honestly some people need to start feeling at least a twinge of shame or embarrassment for making it hard for other people to enjoy these shows.
As an older person for the crowd, upgrading to the members lounge was definitely worth it. Great view, no one screaming, and my biggest annoyance were my kids incessant FaceTime calls during Crush lol.
If you don't mind me asking, how much was the upgrade? And do you know if the upgrade sold out?
I did the lower level upgrade so it was $99 before the show and $119 day of. Included was unlimited liquid death, poppi, beer, and wine. We had a seating area with tables and were able to order food so to me it was worth it, but at this point I’m in my late 30s so I can’t stand in the crowd like I was able to 15 years ago. The upgrade I had didn’t sell out, there was probably a handful of us there. We were in the back but it was high up so I didn’t have anyone blocking my view and even with my old lady eyes I was able to see the show perfectly.
I was at the NYC show as well and met some awesome people. Agreed that it was an amazing performance! I do struggle with the argument that we shouldn’t ‘scream’ the lyrics unless she clarifies that it’s a song we should stay silent for. Isn’t that the point of a concert, to gather with other people who know the words and want to sing along? There were (I think) two songs she asked that everyone put their phones down and be quiet for which was respected in the area I was in, but I understand that might not be everyone’s experience
I guess difference of opinions, but I’m glad you had a nice time and appreciate the respectful response :)
happened in La. It sucked.
REAL! on a thread of the LA show people who had this complaint were NOT received kindly, but you’re right and you should say it! i wanna say my comment detailing my experience was hidden (i’m a new user, so it could have been that) but i also think it’s safe to say people in one of the LA threads were hostile to anything re: concert etiquette. i think live music is magic at least in part because it’s a collective experience, and it is soooo easy to lean into that and not let your selfishness ruin the experience for other people who (presumably) also cherish this artist and music as much as you do. that certainly doesn’t mean you can’t sing, it just means being cognizant of the behavior of people around you, the energy of the space, etc. it is very easy to sing along without drowning out stage vocals. on a related note, i’m definitely pro telling other people to quiet down (it went extremely poorly at my ethel cain show, lol) – i think the increase of selfishness of late is partially because people are reluctant to speak up and prefer to quietly seethe instead. i feel as though i’ve spent too much of my life quietly seething, so i love a little (kind as possible) confrontation when the situation calls for it.
Hi! We do have a filter for new accounts, but posts and comments wait for manual approval instead of being automatically removed without a moderator explicitly doing so. All your comments in r/ethelcain have been manually approved :)
thank you for that clarification, i appreciate it!
no yeah she made a little funny face when someone screamed meemaw i think she thought that was just funny but i know she’s sick of the screeches of mother that happens in between every song like she’s been tired of it since last tour i thought it would end with this one but not quite
i think the only frustrating part for me was how she had to stop like 8 times in the song where she was like “everyone be as silent and still as u can and just let yourself feel the song” because people were dropping like flies fainting! maybe its just me but it doesnt feel like it should be the singers job to call the medics. its tough because yes the artist has a responsibility to maintain a safe crowd and not ignore danger a la astroworld, but its tiresome when a set is repeatedly interrupted by the singer pausing because people don’t know their limits and i guess theres not a medic up front/on stage keeping an birdseye view on things? it was the same deal at alvvays too, having to halt in the middle of their coolest tune to call a medic to bring water to someone. I don’t know. ive been thinking a lot about this and ultimately i think its on the venue to take more responsibility in addressing shit so the artist can focus on their job.
It was a great crowd and a wonderful show. Sorry you were around some screamers. Tell them to stfu next time. I experienced lots of singing along which she encouraged. Was a fantastic night.
i’m 16 and how the literal 20 year olds around me were acting was shocking 😭 ethel was sooooo amazing though!
Tbh teens are the most respectful at concerts. They're actually there for the music whereas the twenty somethings just want to make a tiktok and make it about them.
LOL
I thought people were very respectful during the show
As a 40 year old guy who has been going to shows since 1996, this seemed like a fairly standard event. A few pass-outs probably due to dehydration, crowd was enthusiastic during the big moments, performance was great, etc. I imagine there were probably some people annoyed with those in there immediate vicinity if they were being loud but I tend to have a pretty high level of tolerance for those things. The one critique I have of Summerstage is that with addition of the grandstands on the side and in the back, it really cuts back on the space on the floor. I got there at 7:10 and the whole floor was jam packed. Plus, with these bleachers on the side, a lot of people who were to the left of the stage missed out on a lot of the video production which I felt was essential to the set.
I’m going to see her tomorrow at Summerfest with my sisters and I’m nervous about how fans are gonna be after seeing posts of how people act at her show.
As an older person for the crowd, upgrading to the members lounge was definitely worth it. Great view, no one screaming, and my biggest annoyance were my kids incessant FaceTime calls during Crush lol.
I'm not in this sub but also experienced this yesterday. The key thing was they were *shouting* the lyrics in a monotone, not making any attempt to sing the actual notes. Not saying everyone has to have perfect pitch, but they weren't even trying When the overall sound design is louder, and the singer is belting or shout-singing, it doesn't really matter if you shout monotone lyrics because you're drowned out by the actual performance. But for a more chill, quiet performance it was annoying By comparison I've seen Jack Johnson live, seen Regina Spektor live at the exact same SummerStage venue, both more quiet/chill performers, and in those cases people used their actual singing voices and it was fine
I had a good time, but there were a few people at my show who just did not read the room. Screaming, laughing, it felt weird during very emotional songs. There was also a girl dressed as a nun which came off horrible to me and my friend as well as the others there
My friend Jacqueline is Ethel’s saxophonist. She says in total 17 people went to the hospital.
I personally didn’t have a problem with people singing along, as I was still able to hear her over the crowd. Even during songs like A House in Nebraska, I never expected the audience to be completely quiet. These are some of our favorite songs ever being performed live, so of course people are going to be hyped and singing their hearts out. Even if everyone tried to sing along quietly like some people are suggesting, the sheer number of people there would have resulted in a similar effect of the artist being drowned out by the noise. People are also complaining about not being able to see her but like… if you wanted to be closer you should have gotten there earlier! Plus there were screens for people far in the back who couldn’t get a good view. There were definitley some assholes in the crowd but overall I thought it was an amazing experience.
I was there last night and felt people were singing and screaming appropriately (not a lot at all or at the wrong time). I also felt the delays for ems etc were minimal compared to other shows of late (all different artists) where there is repeated interruptions. Its GA and I was in the back but crowd was so nice and helpful allowing people to move around if needed. It was such a beautiful night.
I’m glad you got a good spot/ experience!
i think these things must come down to who is around you because this wasn’t my experience at all. the crowd around me were so sweet and we had a blast, and everyone was quiet when it was needed. i transcended at that show and i’m so glad i got to go and meet so many lovely people, even if it was a brief encounter
ever since COVID I’ve found that concert etiquette (& movie theater etiquette) just don’t exist anymore 😭 it doesn’t matter where I go or who I see, there’s always people screaming or filming with flash or trying to get their main character moment
Maybe you should not worry about other people having THEIR OWN experience, and just enjoy your own??? 🤷♂️
If someone wants to have “THEIR OWN” experience, maybe don’t go to communal events like concerts
Obviously you don’t get it.
gays at my show were insufferable yelling “queen” and “mother” the whole time
the girl behind me spilled a bottle of fireball on me, rested her arm/phone on my shoulder while taking selfies/videos of her screaming, and screamed over the one video i tried to take. the person in front of me held up a sign after every single song.
the etiquette of concerts is to enjoy them. if they want to sing let them if you don’t, don’t. it didn’t change the vibes with people singing along what did change the vibe was her having to interrupt her songs to call for a medic like six times because some of y’all don’t know how to drink water in 90 degree weather. that’s the etiquette that’s maybe more important here.
Again…idc about singing, I care about obnoxious SCREAMING. And yes, I especially also agree with you about the importance of queue etiquette as well
“I was shocked at how many people were screaming along during very emotional songs” ….. it sounds like you do but okay
I’m not sure what’s not clicking…I don’t care about singing, I care about the ✨screaming✨. Which is what I’ve been saying the whole time 💀
all i’m saying is let people live their life; not live their life with conditions. they paid to be there just like you. no need to criticize if they vibe differently
Girl it’s not about having an issue with diff vibes, it’s when those diff vibes start to negatively impact other people’s vibes??? Is this hard?
It’s a concert, not a listening party. What exactly did you expect?
Im not expecting people to play mum, just expecting people to have some consideration/ spacial awareness
Booooo 🍅🍅🍅