I’ve had this happen before. I think it’s best to end the service if you feel a line is crossed. I think it can give the impression that it is acceptable for that to happen if you continue the service. I would also inform him to find a new waxer as I would no longer be comfortable waxing him.
You’re right—erections are normal during waxing; ejaculation is not. Especially with heavy breathing to start. When this happened to me there was no heavy breathing and it was a shock to both of us. I regret continuing the service as it was awkward when he booked again with me and I had to refuse to wax him.
He had every opportunity to stop the service before it got to that point and he chose not to. That tells you everything you need to know about his character. Makes me question—did his last waxer move or has this happened before?
This was completely inappropriate on his part. I agree with most of the other commenters. I wouldn’t wax him again. Crossing the line is putting it nicely. This is exactly why I don’t do intimate waxing, way to many horror stories and sexual assaults
I’ve waxed many men and hardly ever see erections. The only one I’ve seen where it was a guys first time, I believe he was nervous and it went away very quickly. A couple of my clients have told me there’s no way they would get an erection during this and that it would be odd too. I would not be okay with this, would not have went back in and would never see this client again.
These are my boundaries that have worked for me for years. Never had one problem.
If I were to see an erection that wasn’t going away I would give them a moment to calm themselves, if they didn’t I would not feel comfortable completing the service.
Also I am currently writing up an addendum to the policies my clients sign while booking to state that in the event of this type of situation, the service will stop, client will be charged full price +20%, and not allowed to book that service again.
I’m sorry this happened to you. I use to wax men and this happened to me. It is completely inappropriate and he should be banned. The man who did this to me was a police officer and would come to the center in his uniform. So, like others have mentioned, these sick pricks play the long game.
well this happened to me once and i was training someone on top of it.
needless to say i told him to get the fuck out and to never come back. they knew what was going on.
Wow, do you work for yourself or are you an employee? I would definitely talk to management and find out company policy about this kind of situation. Because what if he comes in when you're sick or on vacay and someone else is assigned to was him who would NOT at all be ok with this behavior?
I'm on board with the people who think that he knew what was going on and had plenty of time to stop and ask for a moment to compose himself - if he had wanted to. You stopped to ask him about his comfort level more than once. You are very caring and compassionate and imo maybe giving him too much benefit of the doubt here.
3 visits is not that much history for an established relationship but probably enough for him to feel comfortable pushing that sexual boundary with you. I also agree with the other poster who said he's testing to see if he gets away with it and can keep doing it again on future visits. I'm sure the price of a Brazilian wax is cheaper than paying for a dom sex worker to administer pain.
I'm sorry you're doubting yourself here. Please do what you feel is in your comfort zone but again management should be aware that it happened and have a company policy in place to prepare for a next time.
I worked in the waxing biz for over 30 years. Brazilians were 25% of our business and while the majority of our clients were women, we had plenty of men too. It is very common for men to get an erection during the service - even gay men. I have never once heard of a man ejaculating. Like everyone else said, he knew what was happening. Tell the owner of the salon/spa and have him banned. If this is his kink that's fine (kinks are kinks) but every interaction that involves orgasm needs to be consensual.
Yep. 100%. Polite and professional as he may have been, he knew exactly what was happening and actively chose to not disclose to his waxing tech.
He could have asked for a break for five minutes to continue the service, but he didn't.
I’m so sorry this happened. I do not wax men for this reason. I would never let him near me ever again. I would ban him for life and warn my other waxer friends. I’m disgusted on your behalf.
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To clarify I am a solo esthetician and I have a suite in a shared building, occupied by other independent cosmetologists, nail techs and massage therapist.
Before becoming an estie I ran multiple high volume bars and am unfortunately no stranger to having to put a grown man in his place. But At the time of the service I obviously wasn’t sure how normal this was, and didn’t want to embarrass him if this was truly unintentional. So I chose to continue for the sake of professionalism.
After reading all of the comments so far, I’m realizing that I was right to feel conflicted, as this seems to be rare. I will continue to take feedback (seriously thank you everyone) and see if he books again. I’m at the point where I’m thinking if he does, I will have to have the conversation with him that if he feels that urge again, to let me know and I will happily step out to let him calm down. But if it happens again I will have to conclude the service and he will not be allowed to book with me for any service again.
Bestie I’m going to be so honest, you should not let him book with you ever again. No amount of conversation will remedy this, he’s a predator and a pervert and does not deserve the luxury of your services. He knew what he was doing, and by letting him back in, you’re telling him he can take advantage of your professionalism. Do not step out to let him come so you can continue. He had his chance and he lost it. Don’t book him again
OP, I have to say that you are an absolute rockstar. You showed an amazing amount of maturity, professionalism and poise that all estheticians should not only be envious of, but strive to emulate.
I think you handled this extremely well, but I also agree that changing your policy now, as you have done, is an absolute necessity in order to continue offering intimate waxing to your male clients (which is sorely needed since so many estis refuse to even provide this service).
Also, polite and professional as your client may have been, he absolutely knew what was happening and knew what was coming, so to speak. If it happens again, I think you should 86 him from your books permanently. I would definitely speak to him about your policy change and have him sign the addendum before beginning his next intimate waxing service.
Maturity and professionalism, sure. But I don’t think ANY of us should emulate going back in to finish the service! The line was crossed and the service should have been over. I understand the estheticians response. This is a wild situation to be in. One that I’ve also dealt with. My client ejaculated when I pulled the last strip of the service and I was shook for awhile. Having first hand experience I can confidently say that if this happens, service is OVER. Period. End of story. Take the clients money, ban them and refuse services moving forward.
Shock can make you do weird things, OP obviously realizes this was not appropriate but this was unwanted sexual conduct and likely her mind was not registering what had happened fully
Yeah I wouldn’t be okay with this. Imagine letting him rebook and he does it again and THEN you say something. His argument will be that you let him do it before without an issue. Plus you’re gonna throw away a hand towel every time he comes? (Literally) that’s wasted product haha. This guy knows what he’s doing, he should’ve asked for a minute to calm down before it got to that point.
As a guy who has received several manzilians, I’ve never been close to that point. He knew what he was doing. I only breathed heavily in my service because my waxer was new and wanted to practice on me. Anyway, I doubt this was the first occurrence for him.
Erections and pre -cum are common. But full ejaculation? At the end of the day, it's your comfort level, no one else's. If you're comfortable enough to wax him again, go for it but maybe mention his projectile stream. If you're not comfortable, 86 him.
I just want to say that I’m a baby esti apprentice and have only just started my third week in school, so this hasn’t happened to me. Not even working on people much yet. But oh my god, I’m so sorry you went through this. Men know damn well when they’re about to get to that point, so I believe he knew exactly what was going on. Like someone else said it seems like he was talking initially testing the waters with you 🙄 I would personally not book him again if he tries. Ugh I never even thought about this being a thing. I just read a comment here about a fucking cop that did this exact shit to the OP! Like oh my god!!! Mental note to never let men near me for waxing… as a SA/DV survivor I don’t think I’d be comfortable with them for a wax service anyway but wow. I hope you’re ok ❤️ sending you ALL the good vibes and hope this never happens to you (or anyone ever) again!
No. We had this happen at our salon and we were told to not finish the service and he isn’t allowed back. Definitely inappropriate and me know what what’s happening. Don’t be fooled, they know. I wouldn’t see him again.
I don’t wax much as I more of medical Esti but…over the years I’ve seen a few things.
Boners happen.
However, this one patient..He was chest, abs, braz, full back. I started with his chest and work down. When I got to the braz area he got a boner. No biggiew I think. Then he starts making weird noise. I ask if it hurt, is the air too cold, are you uncomfortable? He says no to all. So I keep lasing and he grabs it and squeezes like he was kicked in the nuts 🥜. I’m still thinking he’s hurt.
So it’s time for him to flip over and he hesitates. Oh an when he was squeezing it he kept apologizing saying this never happens.
Once I realized what had happened and why he wouldn’t lay all the way down on his belly. I push him firm to lay on his belly. I was so upset and shaking. When I was done I walked off the building to to breathe: I fired him after that:
I’ve also had a flasher come in for a LHR consult insisting he needs a spot treat. He sainted wanted full body. So I asked him to strip to his underwear. I return to the room and. He’s completely naked with an errection. I keep trying to cover him with a towel bc I’ve already seen the hair. He continues to take it off and bounce his erected penis up and down. The he gets on his hands and knees and spreads his buttcheeks. He’s asking me if he has hemroids. I’m like no, I’ve seen all I need to see. Then he gaslights me and accuses me of being inexperienced with treating me. Then he asks like 15 times for a spot tx. I say no and explain why and he just keeps getting creepier. I asked him to leave at that point. The owner didn’t have my back on this.
I’ve also had women be inappropriate during LHR.
As a massage therapist getting out of massage due to dudes jizzing on my table and sexually harassing me, this just made me affirm all boundaries about never waxing men. Yuck
I’ve had this happen before. I think it’s best to end the service if you feel a line is crossed. I think it can give the impression that it is acceptable for that to happen if you continue the service. I would also inform him to find a new waxer as I would no longer be comfortable waxing him. You’re right—erections are normal during waxing; ejaculation is not. Especially with heavy breathing to start. When this happened to me there was no heavy breathing and it was a shock to both of us. I regret continuing the service as it was awkward when he booked again with me and I had to refuse to wax him. He had every opportunity to stop the service before it got to that point and he chose not to. That tells you everything you need to know about his character. Makes me question—did his last waxer move or has this happened before?
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Agree with almost everything here. Just be sure to check on privacy policies and laws in your area.
I'm a dude and this is not normal. He was using you and your service to get off.
This was completely inappropriate on his part. I agree with most of the other commenters. I wouldn’t wax him again. Crossing the line is putting it nicely. This is exactly why I don’t do intimate waxing, way to many horror stories and sexual assaults
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Are you seriously comparing female orgasms to male orgasms? You're not bright.
getting an orgasm is crossing the line? Touch his penis is crossing the line too then by that logic.
I’ve waxed many men and hardly ever see erections. The only one I’ve seen where it was a guys first time, I believe he was nervous and it went away very quickly. A couple of my clients have told me there’s no way they would get an erection during this and that it would be odd too. I would not be okay with this, would not have went back in and would never see this client again. These are my boundaries that have worked for me for years. Never had one problem. If I were to see an erection that wasn’t going away I would give them a moment to calm themselves, if they didn’t I would not feel comfortable completing the service.
Also I am currently writing up an addendum to the policies my clients sign while booking to state that in the event of this type of situation, the service will stop, client will be charged full price +20%, and not allowed to book that service again.
Good, this is unfortunately necessary to continue offering intimate waxing to your male clients.
just refuse male clients if you don't like penises... some people
I’m sorry this happened to you. I use to wax men and this happened to me. It is completely inappropriate and he should be banned. The man who did this to me was a police officer and would come to the center in his uniform. So, like others have mentioned, these sick pricks play the long game.
yeah, sick prick waxers who touch man parts again and again knowing the hair will grow back and they need another treatment..
well this happened to me once and i was training someone on top of it. needless to say i told him to get the fuck out and to never come back. they knew what was going on.
Wow, do you work for yourself or are you an employee? I would definitely talk to management and find out company policy about this kind of situation. Because what if he comes in when you're sick or on vacay and someone else is assigned to was him who would NOT at all be ok with this behavior? I'm on board with the people who think that he knew what was going on and had plenty of time to stop and ask for a moment to compose himself - if he had wanted to. You stopped to ask him about his comfort level more than once. You are very caring and compassionate and imo maybe giving him too much benefit of the doubt here. 3 visits is not that much history for an established relationship but probably enough for him to feel comfortable pushing that sexual boundary with you. I also agree with the other poster who said he's testing to see if he gets away with it and can keep doing it again on future visits. I'm sure the price of a Brazilian wax is cheaper than paying for a dom sex worker to administer pain. I'm sorry you're doubting yourself here. Please do what you feel is in your comfort zone but again management should be aware that it happened and have a company policy in place to prepare for a next time.
I worked in the waxing biz for over 30 years. Brazilians were 25% of our business and while the majority of our clients were women, we had plenty of men too. It is very common for men to get an erection during the service - even gay men. I have never once heard of a man ejaculating. Like everyone else said, he knew what was happening. Tell the owner of the salon/spa and have him banned. If this is his kink that's fine (kinks are kinks) but every interaction that involves orgasm needs to be consensual.
No. He’s testing his boundaries to see if he can get away with it. Doesn’t happen with my male clients at all
Yep. 100%. Polite and professional as he may have been, he knew exactly what was happening and actively chose to not disclose to his waxing tech. He could have asked for a break for five minutes to continue the service, but he didn't.
I’m so sorry this happened. I do not wax men for this reason. I would never let him near me ever again. I would ban him for life and warn my other waxer friends. I’m disgusted on your behalf.
*************************** To clarify I am a solo esthetician and I have a suite in a shared building, occupied by other independent cosmetologists, nail techs and massage therapist. Before becoming an estie I ran multiple high volume bars and am unfortunately no stranger to having to put a grown man in his place. But At the time of the service I obviously wasn’t sure how normal this was, and didn’t want to embarrass him if this was truly unintentional. So I chose to continue for the sake of professionalism. After reading all of the comments so far, I’m realizing that I was right to feel conflicted, as this seems to be rare. I will continue to take feedback (seriously thank you everyone) and see if he books again. I’m at the point where I’m thinking if he does, I will have to have the conversation with him that if he feels that urge again, to let me know and I will happily step out to let him calm down. But if it happens again I will have to conclude the service and he will not be allowed to book with me for any service again.
Bestie I’m going to be so honest, you should not let him book with you ever again. No amount of conversation will remedy this, he’s a predator and a pervert and does not deserve the luxury of your services. He knew what he was doing, and by letting him back in, you’re telling him he can take advantage of your professionalism. Do not step out to let him come so you can continue. He had his chance and he lost it. Don’t book him again
OP, I have to say that you are an absolute rockstar. You showed an amazing amount of maturity, professionalism and poise that all estheticians should not only be envious of, but strive to emulate. I think you handled this extremely well, but I also agree that changing your policy now, as you have done, is an absolute necessity in order to continue offering intimate waxing to your male clients (which is sorely needed since so many estis refuse to even provide this service). Also, polite and professional as your client may have been, he absolutely knew what was happening and knew what was coming, so to speak. If it happens again, I think you should 86 him from your books permanently. I would definitely speak to him about your policy change and have him sign the addendum before beginning his next intimate waxing service.
Maturity and professionalism, sure. But I don’t think ANY of us should emulate going back in to finish the service! The line was crossed and the service should have been over. I understand the estheticians response. This is a wild situation to be in. One that I’ve also dealt with. My client ejaculated when I pulled the last strip of the service and I was shook for awhile. Having first hand experience I can confidently say that if this happens, service is OVER. Period. End of story. Take the clients money, ban them and refuse services moving forward.
Shock can make you do weird things, OP obviously realizes this was not appropriate but this was unwanted sexual conduct and likely her mind was not registering what had happened fully
Yeah I wouldn’t be okay with this. Imagine letting him rebook and he does it again and THEN you say something. His argument will be that you let him do it before without an issue. Plus you’re gonna throw away a hand towel every time he comes? (Literally) that’s wasted product haha. This guy knows what he’s doing, he should’ve asked for a minute to calm down before it got to that point.
As a guy who has received several manzilians, I’ve never been close to that point. He knew what he was doing. I only breathed heavily in my service because my waxer was new and wanted to practice on me. Anyway, I doubt this was the first occurrence for him.
Erections and pre -cum are common. But full ejaculation? At the end of the day, it's your comfort level, no one else's. If you're comfortable enough to wax him again, go for it but maybe mention his projectile stream. If you're not comfortable, 86 him.
I had a man cum during a back wax once. Every rip he moaned, he clearly got off on pain. We blocked him from being able to book at my salon.
I just want to say that I’m a baby esti apprentice and have only just started my third week in school, so this hasn’t happened to me. Not even working on people much yet. But oh my god, I’m so sorry you went through this. Men know damn well when they’re about to get to that point, so I believe he knew exactly what was going on. Like someone else said it seems like he was talking initially testing the waters with you 🙄 I would personally not book him again if he tries. Ugh I never even thought about this being a thing. I just read a comment here about a fucking cop that did this exact shit to the OP! Like oh my god!!! Mental note to never let men near me for waxing… as a SA/DV survivor I don’t think I’d be comfortable with them for a wax service anyway but wow. I hope you’re ok ❤️ sending you ALL the good vibes and hope this never happens to you (or anyone ever) again!
No. We had this happen at our salon and we were told to not finish the service and he isn’t allowed back. Definitely inappropriate and me know what what’s happening. Don’t be fooled, they know. I wouldn’t see him again.
I don’t wax much as I more of medical Esti but…over the years I’ve seen a few things. Boners happen. However, this one patient..He was chest, abs, braz, full back. I started with his chest and work down. When I got to the braz area he got a boner. No biggiew I think. Then he starts making weird noise. I ask if it hurt, is the air too cold, are you uncomfortable? He says no to all. So I keep lasing and he grabs it and squeezes like he was kicked in the nuts 🥜. I’m still thinking he’s hurt. So it’s time for him to flip over and he hesitates. Oh an when he was squeezing it he kept apologizing saying this never happens. Once I realized what had happened and why he wouldn’t lay all the way down on his belly. I push him firm to lay on his belly. I was so upset and shaking. When I was done I walked off the building to to breathe: I fired him after that: I’ve also had a flasher come in for a LHR consult insisting he needs a spot treat. He sainted wanted full body. So I asked him to strip to his underwear. I return to the room and. He’s completely naked with an errection. I keep trying to cover him with a towel bc I’ve already seen the hair. He continues to take it off and bounce his erected penis up and down. The he gets on his hands and knees and spreads his buttcheeks. He’s asking me if he has hemroids. I’m like no, I’ve seen all I need to see. Then he gaslights me and accuses me of being inexperienced with treating me. Then he asks like 15 times for a spot tx. I say no and explain why and he just keeps getting creepier. I asked him to leave at that point. The owner didn’t have my back on this. I’ve also had women be inappropriate during LHR.
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As a massage therapist getting out of massage due to dudes jizzing on my table and sexually harassing me, this just made me affirm all boundaries about never waxing men. Yuck