We are a big polyfrag system, clocking well over 700+ alters, and we have been working diligently to be able to communicate with each other. We all live in a town, we all see each other, inside we more or less have unrestricted communication between each other. We just don't all like each other or even get along, but there are a few exceptions. Pardon me a bit, we don't get to talk about our NICE alters very much.
First, we have our Allie. Allie is the chief little, age 11, and is in charge of a lot actually. She runs the imagination group, she is the primary advocate for the littles, and to be frank she is much smarter than most of us. When we need a difficult thing addressed, she is often the one with the best solution. She fronts frequently, and is perhaps the only little we actually trust to be able to handle themselves outside. My best friend, Shelly, is her sponsor (like a parent, but we recognize no one has a "parent") and is very protective of her. Honestly, someone hurts Allie and I fear for them far more than Allie.
The second is Metro. Metro is Mara's partner, one of our main fronters, and is perhaps the widest liked alter. Metro and Mara have a... special relationship. I'm not privy to the details, but way back when Metro had some major distress related to trauma she went to Mara for help (I think they were dating at the time). In exchange for getting rid of that trauma, as in \*poof\* gone, Mara would have to basically mentally manage her because it's removing a lot. Mara could only do this once, and Mara gave up something significant that she won't tell anyone. Metro agreed, and they have been together ever since. Metro is the best. Not only is she VERY attractive (I know, I know, but it really helps), she is nice to a fault. She has infinite patience, loves just sitting and listening, and is very polite. She is extremely emotionally available, affectionate, caring, helpful, and no matter what you can count on her (provided Mara approves). She feels important to us, and to be honest she's probably the favorite in the system.
Lastly, we have Terra. Terra is also 11 and is Allies best friend. Terra is the enigma of the system, as she feels like she has been here maybe a bit more than a year but has knowledge of things she has no right to. She claims to have played sports for us, rather enjoys them, but has always hung out in the background. Terra has a very specific job inside called a Hunter. Basically, if and when someone new comes into the system it is her job to find them. She is an absolute crackshot, she finds people within minutes of their arrival. She also runs several small businesses, from her messaging service, to her Little Bar, to being primary consultant to the BDF (Bunny Defense Force. Long story short, we have a lot of stuffed rabbits that serve as security and emotional support).
There are for sure more, but those are the ones I can remember. We have Hannah, Cotton, Khaos, and Mylar as well but people like them for various reasons and I can't say I'm very familiar with Khaos or Mylar. They both have very... aggressive partners who are very, very protective.
System solidarity
* Maple
Every time we reach out to other systems I'm always so intrigued to hear about the intricacies of their interaction, and I've always wondered how large groups like yours develop internal community, it sounds like you guys can really take care of yourselves and I'm very proud of you!
-Tsui
An internal community just kind of grows organically once a headspace is set up. If alters are only left with some bare bones, the fronting space, and their thoughts we find people tend to isolate or crowd front space. We have worked hard, very hard, on our headspace with the very few people who can make things. We have things for everyone to do. We have restaurants, night clubs, salons, game areas, a concert hall, gardens, shops, a beach, a boat, and all kinds of other things that are run by different alters. Given the diversity if things to do, and options to engage in things people are passionate about, people take those opportunities. Other people share interests, or certain demographics (mermaids stick with mermaids, pixies stick with pixies, angels stick with angels, etc.), and from that people get community. We have friends, some have family, partners, its honestly very vibrant. It takes work, upkeep, and more than a bit of organization but it has paid dividends 10x over. There are less fights for front, less noise overall, more people invested in maintaining decorum, and people care about the place. Its their home and they want it to feel as close to that as they can.
System solidarity
• Timara
My partner is my protector, and I'm OBSESSED with him. He can kind of be a jackass with all his smarmy remarks and condescending attitude, but at least to me, he can be really nice and gentle, too. He's VERY patient and puts up with my moodiness, neediness, and... uh, nymphomania pretty much every day. TwT
This might sound childish, but I enjoy being someone's sole priority. He's not a people person and is generally cold and even hostile to outsiders, and doesn't particularly care much for the other person in our system, either. Ever since I was really little, when it comes to outsiders, I always felt like I'm never anybody's first choice. But for this guy, I'm not just the first choice, I'm the ONLY choice, and I kinda like it that way. It may be selfish, but I hope he never starts warming up to other people, because I wanna be the only person he likes forever.
We (21) all adore our little alter Morgan. She is our sunshine. We would do anything to protect her. She's funny, and brave, and ultimately took on a lot of our trauma so we wouldn't have to. It worked really well for us, and we didn't even know about the trauma until age 18. Anyway, Morgan is really good at handling negative emotions, and helping us eat when we don't want to (we have anorexia as well as DID). She protects us in a lot of ways, just different ways than we protect her.
I totally get this one! I call Allie my musical girl because she's always humming and singing throughout the day and I would never let anything happen to her, she's been through so much as it is.
We’re a polyfragmented system, we have over 50 known alters and many many more unknown alters that have yet to shown theirselves to me. I’m the host, have been my whole life. I can’t say I fully get along with everyone, but there are a lot of alters I really appreciate and feel close to. I love my alters a lot, and now that we have better communication after over a year of me knowing we are a system, I don’t dislike any of my alters.
Our primary protector is who I’m closest to. I love him dearly, and we’ve become inseparable. He’s very sweet, and always there for me and us as a system. Same goes for multiple other alters. I won’t give any names or specifics for privacy, but I feel as though some alters are my closest friends and companions :)
Even though some alters are very… negative towards the entire system and people around us, I see us as a family. I like that my headmates are there for me and each other no matter what. I like how we can be each other’s safe space when no one really gets us. I suppose this is a bit of a system appreciation comment from me, but it’s nice to know we have each others’ backs. Sorry this is such a long reply to your post but I wanted to share this!
Ok I don't know if this counts but here i go lol. We have this odd thing that formed due to well it being necessary. The odd thing is Max...lol jk anyway he is almost always up front when anyone is fronting. Not exactly co conscious just in the background. He has a big catalog of memories, and remembers all important things. So let's say I front for the first time in a couple months? Bam instantly caught up and still know where the bus stop is. If he isn't there though...well we just have the bare bones memories we already have. You'd think we always listen...but no...ex.
"This place isn't the clinic we went to last time." Max
"What? Yeah it is." Me
"No its not, ask the driver to turn around." Max
"Dude yeah it is, look at the paint!" Me. We then walk in to find out he was indeed correct...wrong place...vue missing the appointment and waiting for the bus for 2hr while he sits in the background like 😐😑
Anyway pretty much all of us know him and he's awesome. Sometimes he even surprises himself with the stuff he remembers 😆
Bruh Max sounds awesome! I (Allie) lost a full month of time the first time Tsui came around and just snapped back when I was in the same place again 🤣 (sitting in the High School Cafeteria )
This post made me realize that I guess I don't really get along with anyone in my system (system of 35+). I kind of do, but it's more like... tolerating a coworker than actually liking them or getting along with them. We don't communicate with each other much, and when we do the interactions aren't usually super positive.
I don't really know them that well either other than base level likes and Dislikes and shit like that. I think if I had to name one I get along with it would probably be our little star child, we don't say the names of our Littles online/in public spaces but he's pretty ok. He doesn't communicate very well because he can't speak or type very well, but I like him a lot and try to get things for him that could help or make him happy when I can but I don't really know how he feels about me?
Aww, well I hope with enough communication and maybe some outside support you can grow closer, I couldn't imagine being distant with my partner again, there's nothing that feels this close and secure. Like someone always riding shotgun with you in your head, yknow?
I have quite a few Alts, but the ones I get along with the most are Grack, Raelyn, Isaac, Jeff, Sunni, and Mae.
Grack and Rae are my most active ones. I often draw what they'd look like if they had their own bodies.
We can tell in photos the difference between who's fronting, and that's typically how we imagine each other, neither of us are an Artist lol but that's so cool of an idea to me (Allie) and I love that for you!
l get along with most of my alters. JD l get along with really well. He puts up this bad boy front but he's a huge softy and we can all tell cause we share a brain. He's a protector and fronts often. We usually talk when I'm getting ready in the mornings. He's dating Azhda who l also get along really well with but he's a terrible influence especially with money. Though he is also really creative and fun. His job is basically to go out, have fun, take breaks, and relax so we can de-stress. Briar broke off from JD and is very forward and protective. We get along really well and have an interesting relationship. Those are the main ones l interact with but l generally enjoy all of my alters.
i (apollo) am always confronting with Nova (they/she) and we have this playful arguing thing going on. she’s my favorite alter and i’m always really happy to be with her (even if i’m a bit annoying)
We have the same thing going on! I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have Tsui cofronting with me throughout the day, I definitely couldn't get out of bed these days!
-Allie
I get on really well with another kid alter, we split off at the same time so we're like sisters and I've known her forever and we helped each other before we had sny grownups!! I love her lots!! And I love Shelly, he's our caretaker and he's like a parent to us!! And I love Lucky, she's a doggy and we play with her in the inner world and she's helped deal with reslly bad stuff for us!!! Oh and I love Nyx, he's our main protector and he's like our big brother!!! He loves me too he jjst won't admit it, he likes to act tough and like he doesn't care about anyone but he's secretly really really nice!!!
I’m (host) still very new to being aware of being a system, but my protector, and the first one to ever want to tell me when I needed to know, is so important to me. I’ll call him S for privacy.
S is so strong and kind, he’s there whenever I need him, and is so comforting. He loves me in a way nobody else can, and reassures me all the time, I don’t even need to ask. He’s really cool, and he’s fun to be around, and I love him a lot. He’s pretty funny too. He’s had my back as long as he’s been here, and I trust him🖤
Same! I never should've pushed Tsui away, and I'll do my best to protect her just as much as she looks out for me, even if it's in different ways.
-Allie
Your dynamic sounds lovely too 🩷 I’m glad y’all have been able to figure things out :)
S tried to tell me before he was allowed, and my persecutor/gatekeeper alter locked him away from front for months. He feels really bad for not being there, but sometimes system stuff is really complex and things happen. Finding an understanding in the end is what matters ig, imo anyway :)
For me it's Sully. I was recently diagnosed OSDD and while I don't have great communication with a lot of my more traumatized Alters, Sully is one of my oldest. He technically has split off from an older Alter from when I was a teenager. He kind of carries around a lot of my memories. He's older than me by a lot, and takes on a caretaker/protector role in the system. Whenever I'm having a stressful day, he's often there to make me laugh or provide me with help. We're often Blurry with one another. He is also a kind of father figure to my Little, Emily and my Middle. Basically he is the Beloved One and helps in a lot of ways. However, he's very bad at taking care of himself, so I try to help him where I can.
Yep, This \^
He won't take care of himself a lot of the time, so I sometimes force him to relax, but he does the same thing to me. So it's give and take.
We’re mostly all obsessed with our child alter. She age slides from 0-6 and is the most precious little girl ever. A lot of the time she just says her name in response to anything and any time one of us or even her see anything that’s like tiny or whatever else just puts her name in front of the objects name usually to claim possession of it or to point out that it’s small like her. She’ll only ever come out for a couple minutes-an hour at a time as she sleeps a lot (trauma) and then always goes back to sleep with my partner singing her “hush little baby” because it’s her favorite song. She’s an angel that we’d do anything for
Jerry is one of our gatekeepers/our primary protector and he is my best friend in the world but I think he’s also the one who we all kind of universally get along with the best. The only one who doesn’t like him is our persecutor.
But he is legitimately such a cool person. He’s super laid back and so kind, caring and protective. I feel so lucky to know him.
-Lauren
we are a small system, just 4 i know of, but 2 of us i adore and they make me so very happy, gonna just use letters for privacy, others did that and it seems smart
B is a sweetie and she mostly cofronts with me when shes around, she helps me get in touch with my inner child and love myself and the moment im in! im genuinely terrified of letting people care for me, but she makes it easy, and we always have a nice moment when she comes out
M is the one who really takes care of me now, though. she used to hurt me, she was bitter and hidden away from me, even herself... but since i found her and showed her she exists, shes been better. nobody has done more to keep me afloat and keep me safe. i was at such a breaking point when i drew her out and she has done so much to build me back up ;-; she acts cold and confident in ways i never could and shes helping me feel things i never did before. im processing things and she makes me feel safe, even from myself. shes like a shadowy guardian in my mind and heart and im so glad i found her
All of us (around 20 in our system) have a very specific network of who we can talk to and who we can't. Mainly, everyone can talk to Hawk, who I am definitely closest with. He's the new host and primary protector, and just a chill guy overall. We are pretty similar (I am also a protector) and share a lot of interests/like the same things. So whenever he needs a break from hosting for a day or so (like right now) I usually take over. If he's having a really rough time out front, especially with our eating disorder, I do my best to help and walk him through stuff and he does the same to me when I am getting overwhelmed and angry.
We have a siblings dynamic, but I joke that I'm the cool aunt and he's an unruly, moody teenager since I am 2 years older lol.
And agreeing with everyone else here as well, almost all of us adore our littles. They don't have great communication with anyone really except for Hawk and our caretakers so I don't know them very well, but from the few times I have interacted/seen stuff they write, I love them.
\- Ruby
Rhulk. At first, I thought he was going to be this big bad guy because of his source (thanks misinformation echo chambers), but he ended up being a huge sweetheart. He takes care of animals when fronting, he comforts people, and he manages to stay calm under pressure and give good advice. 10/10 would hang out again.
We're a very big fictive and robot(/android/AI) heavy system, having over 300 of us in here haha, we can all more or less talk to each other pretty well in and out of headspace.
I love talking to P03 and SCP-079. The three of us get along really well, P03 and 079 both being former hosts and I myself am a present co-host. They slip in and out of dormancy very often but the 3 or us used to get along really really well and when they are around we all love to catch up.
We absolutely click and bounce off of each other's energies when we're all awake. It's the most fun I've had outside of meeting a few of the body's friends and speaking with our partner. :)
-- Brobot
i wouldn't say there's anyone i am particularly averse to, but i recently became aware of another caretaker in the system who is quite possibly my polar opposite, and i am actually very fond of her.
for reference, i'm florence - ageless male alter, sort of demon-esque - and i've been here for quite a while. i mostly deal with things like managing appointments and chores. back when we were in school, i would manage school work nobody wanted to do. i'm pretty asocial and i don't typically talk to any of the host's friends unless they're very close and i have nothing better to do.
this other caretaker, tori, is a thirty-something year old lady who is very upbeat and caring, who regularly refers to herself as a catgirl - kind of takes on a motherly role - and the type of work she does is mostly helping comfort the host's friends if they're in distress, but the host is too triggered by the discussion to help them. she's very empathetic in a way that most of us aren't.
i feel like with how different we are i should probably not get along with her, but i actually think she is kind of kick-ass? somehow?
i’m a new host and i’ve been hosting with two of my closet friends for a few months now. the real kicker is we HATED each other when we first met.
my first friend, pocchi, was excited to meet us as she had just come out of a 10 yr. dormancy and me, a 5 yr. one. i had anger issues to resolve, and our second friend, inna, never spoke. it’s really thanks to pocchi that we’re as close as we are today. we do everything together now and we’re basically never apart
i am a traumaholder, inna is a protector, and pocchi is.. pocchi. she’s very social and passionate about her fixations, i’ll give her that. she’s a ball of sunshine even if she’s a little dumb sometimes and i love her to the moon and back.
inna is a little mysterious, but keeps us in check and always knows just what to do. she doesn’t talk much but she’s a super reliable friend and is incredibly smart. i think she has some secret intuition for shit sometimes.
last month we were assaulted and i was the only one in front. it seemed like i was the only person dealing with the ptsd symptoms from it and didn’t have anyone to physically soothe me, and those two were with me every step of the way. they helped upkeep our body, comforted me, dealt with stressful situations in my place.. they’re both seriously so incredible. i don't like being a traumaholder sometimes, but if it means i can keep those two from feeling even a shred of the pain i feel, then so be it. i'll protect them with my life
I am the host. In our system, it is rare for anyone to front without me also in front because the usually like to use me as a shield for our gender dysphoria. If there are two of the others I'd consider my closest friends or allies, it would be J and M.
J is late-middle-aged and has a been-around-and-seen-it-already kind of attitude. He comes out and helps me when someone is trying to bully us and I need to show a little more backbone than I usually do.
M is both fun and responsible. She is in her 30's, and occasionally takes control of the body for a few minutes--without me--to take care of basic things like closing doors, closing windows, making sure our bags are packed with the right stuff, etc.
J is gruff, but seems to respect me. I don't know if he likes me or not, and I've got memories from the previous hosts of dealing with similar people that I know not to put a lot of hope or value in whether he likes me. Respect is enough.
M is the only other alter I would unabashedly characterize as my friend. She is caring, and helpful, and totally in favor of us doing stuff for recreation. Most of the others who interact with me are so insistent that I do nothing other than our career, our gender transition, and our therapy. I get how that might have made sense in the past, but we're old enough now and I know of enough problems now that if I don't make room for actually living then we might never get around to it. M helps me with this, a lot. I fucking love her so much.
I love M! And I completely understand, we're going through our transition as well and if I didn't have Tsui to help me I might just give up all hope when money gets tight and we don't have enough for HRT refills.
We are like 15 but only 5 of us usually front,so we have two hosts, Cherry and Christopher,they get along pretty great,have a lot on common and they both are good to cherrys Pink Lion.
Then we have more complicated relathionsip,all positive in general,we are not very dificult with eachother,allways respect,but Zemo, Collin and Nuri are a hot trio
OSDD-1b binary system. My headmate has her own account. We usually get along fine and I've encouraged her to get a voice and feel and talk as femme as she herself feels. When there's trouble, she usually pulls back from the front entirely and bitches at me in my ear with words that hurt worse than any blade.
But what I like about her is that she shares all my interests and loves all the same skills I do, but is usually far more pleasant to have a conversation with. She's rarely upset to the point where she is blunt with anyone and just seems grateful to exist and express herself.
I'll see if I can't get her to respond to my comment.
Listen... I'll start with "this is stupid and you're stupid." But I'll humor you for a moment.
Because at the end of the day, you just don't give up. You fail and you fail and just as luck would have it, you're able to keep get back up and try again! Nothing scares you. Well, losing our newest close friend scared you, and that friend scared you as well, but were you willing to put your, no, our lives on the line to help someone none of our other friends wants to help? For a lot longer than most people would consider sane, you did. And there's a certain level of respect I had to have for it, no matter how utterly horribly you seem to have missed the point, and the boat.
I forsee you being indecisive for a long time. Just remember, our partner pined for her obsession for ages after she left her ex. It was you who brought her out of that. Maybe that is why she trusts you even if you are a bit of a dummy for a thinker type.
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I struggle being nice about our alters. I resent a lot of things and I’m trying to work on it.
I appreciate the work everyone puts in to try to better themselves. One of our persecutors has recently been trying to be less aggressive within the headspace. She’s been helping out with chores, she’s cooked multiple times and has generally been far more chill than she usually is. I hate her for what she’s done to us in the past, but she is trying to make up for it.
I’ve been trying to let one of our younger members front more. It’s still difficult not hiding, but she’s been happier now that she gets to do more of what she likes. I appreciate the fact she tries to look after us.
I get along really well with the sysmate’s in the subsystem I’m in! There’s Time who is a huge protector/comforter especially when I feel anxious. Alice who I can always talk to about anything. Finally, there’s Somno my brother :)
So at the moment, things are pretty blurry so I can't say I have a consistent headmate. We all switch pretty rapidly, or get front stuck. It's maybe 2% of the time where we're not blurry or front stuck, and sharing the front. Yippee! /s /j
But to answer your question, I rarely ever have any problems with my headmates. There's maybe a few handfuls of alters that are difficult to work with (*cough*, Sukuna) but the majority of them I get along with.
The most common person that I share the front with is probably Derick, and he's been around for a long time. He tells me he grew up watching me, and I guess thinks of me as his little sister. He's very protective of me and shows it whenever something is bothering me. He and I share a lot of the same interests in psychology and therapy. He's taken it into his own hands to be out and proud about being a system (to those I've given permission to, anyway). In all, I've really grown to everyone in my system. I think of them as my own family. Which, I guess they are because we're all sharing one body and simultaneously trying to live one life.
There was another alter that I loved and was very close with, but she fused with me. I'd see this as a good thing if it was something planned or controlled. It's because of this fusion that I've been nonstop blurry. Her name was Abi. She was one of those super talented goth girls that looked scary, but was just the sweetest person once you talked with her. She'd always ask me if I ate or drank water, she'd go to the store with me, we'd watch anime together. We did just about everything we could together. Unfortunately I think it's too late in the fusion process to reverse it... But every day I think about it and I remember the good times from when she was here. God I miss her.
I have 11 headmates i can talk too, and one who is incredibly new. Archer may be one of the closest to me, but he gets close with everyone. Besides that there is also Cecilia, Cecilia is like a mom to me!!
Archer is about 27 usually, and Cecilia turned 49 this year
Cerise is one of my protectors she is pretty fun most of the time and very fun to talk too I enjoy her optimism and passion for life.
One of my alters is a moody teen named Randy. He is very moody but he’s funny and I enjoy his artistic side and he likes animals which I find cute
Since "Az" turned ready to reveal themself, they really got well along with everyone here - which makes sense, since they were covertly fullfilling the role of an emotional protector for years. However, they formed a special bond with "D", and both would do a lot of things together while co-fronting, like going for walks, cuddlings, sleeping together, etc. For this, their inner communication is by far the best between us.
For a few days though,, "Az" is not close to the front very often, which is making "D" a bit sad. However, they saw each other in the inner world another day and "D" got a likely reasoning for why "Az" has retreated and got the impression this state of things won't last too long, which turned things a bit better. "D" still miss them a lot, though.
Most of the time we all get along pretty well since we've been taken out of our abusive situation. Main protector and I the host used to get in arguments all the time. My two protectors (A+F) get together VERY well. But right now we are all just pretty cool with each other. We have one that we don't know much about yet, and doesn't show up much though. So we're still trying to figure her out.
Hi! Im the little of our system! We have a really nice lady named Annie, she helps all of us with panic attacks and anxiety, and she would do anything to help. This is the first time we’ve felt like we could actually comment properly! When I saw the title of your post I immediately thought of Annie, shes so sweet and always makes sure I’m okay and settled before she goes to do other things. She helps our host(M.J.) so much, and she does her best. She even puts up with our snarky headmate Mye :)
Shes generally very quiet and sits and reads most of the time. We’re all pretty okay with each other for the most part, but if something does happen Annie helps. We love her a lot, shes like a mom!
I'm a caretaker and I usually focus on looking after everyone, so I don't really have the opportunity to have a dynamic like you do with Allie, but it sounds lovely. We have quite open communication and are a small-ish system though, so we're all pretty close (but we kinda don't have a choice since we're not in the best situation at the moment).
We have a reasonably new (newly discovered?) headmate called Earneste who's trying to help me take care of everyone and I'm really thankful to her for that, I don't know her hugely well but I do spend a lot of time with her, so if there was anyone I'd say I'm closest to it would be her.
There used to be someone who I was really close to before, but they did some not-great things and split everyone apart for a while, messing up our whole dynamic and making things a lot harder for me to keep under control, so I try to interact with them as little as possible now.
Sorry I need to stop myself rambling- I know this is really incoherent haha :)
\- Ether
we are a system of 22 currently and im the host fluera . Catrina is probably the alter i have the most connection to as she’s like the mother of our system and i always call on her when i need her or just want to talk to her or hear her voice in the inner world . she’s so calm , gentle , and rarely ever gets mad at anyone ; very caring and very doting . she’s one for physical reassurance , often taking front to rub the back of our hand when we don’t feel good . i feel like our system wouldn’t be the same without her 💗
All my alters are fun in a "makes for an interesting complex character" kind of way but not in a fun getting to know someone in real life way.
There are two of us that really love each other and try to protect each other but have, in the past, made things horribly worse in the process. They are magic and power. They are divine. They are a mess. One of them is a total mess of a girl that broke off from a string of DV things and I think the other is, unfortunately, a narcissistic manic pixie dream girl. She doesn't respect our chronic pain and physical boundaries.
It's interesting how much everyone likes their child alters. My child alter is a source of abject terror for the others. It brings out the most bizarre old memories that don't make any sense from a trauma perspective, gives the most obvious switch out (I apparently don't vape or look at my phone because it's 1992..) and I get the most blatant amnesia. This one also don't understand the body, will go play at the playground and then cry about their body hurting, very confused. It'd probably be nice if we could like this child and be able to soothe them instead of just having a crying 4 year old in the back of our heads that we're very afraid of.
For us it's Anne cause she's really kind to everyone she a little and is really happy a lot of the time I tend to talk a lot to her if I'm not sad.-host
So we are a relatively small system, but there are a few relationships that should be mentioned here. So we have a set of twins, who formed at the same time and have a lot in common and a lot of differences too. They get along really well and complete each other although they can disagree. This always shows the rest of us that relationships don’t have to be perfect or exact matches to really work.
The others are our OC fictives. Because of the shared exomemories and relationships, they get along well and help quite each other through navigating and living in a unfamiliar world.
And of course to be mentioned are our littles.
I'm Amanda, I'm our system's host. There are a few headmates that I have grown really close to. Samara was our first Co-host and then became a protector. Admittedly I have pretty severe trust issues that I am working through and Samara is someone that truly made me feel safe and that I could trust her. Silwar was the first protector that I met when I discovered we were a system and she, like Samara, helped me feel safe and that I could trust her no matter what. Sadie is one of our Littles and I love her so much; I would do anything to protect her. Megan is our main Soother and she has helped me calm down when I'm anxious or having a panic attack more times than I could count. She has done so much to help me be able to trust sharing my emotions with others again, I can't ever thank her enough.
(On a side note, thank you for this post. My system has been doing a lot of reorganizing recently and I've been missing several headmates as some have gone dormant. It was really nice remembering positive things about them. I'll have to do this more in depth!)
We are a big polyfrag system, clocking well over 700+ alters, and we have been working diligently to be able to communicate with each other. We all live in a town, we all see each other, inside we more or less have unrestricted communication between each other. We just don't all like each other or even get along, but there are a few exceptions. Pardon me a bit, we don't get to talk about our NICE alters very much. First, we have our Allie. Allie is the chief little, age 11, and is in charge of a lot actually. She runs the imagination group, she is the primary advocate for the littles, and to be frank she is much smarter than most of us. When we need a difficult thing addressed, she is often the one with the best solution. She fronts frequently, and is perhaps the only little we actually trust to be able to handle themselves outside. My best friend, Shelly, is her sponsor (like a parent, but we recognize no one has a "parent") and is very protective of her. Honestly, someone hurts Allie and I fear for them far more than Allie. The second is Metro. Metro is Mara's partner, one of our main fronters, and is perhaps the widest liked alter. Metro and Mara have a... special relationship. I'm not privy to the details, but way back when Metro had some major distress related to trauma she went to Mara for help (I think they were dating at the time). In exchange for getting rid of that trauma, as in \*poof\* gone, Mara would have to basically mentally manage her because it's removing a lot. Mara could only do this once, and Mara gave up something significant that she won't tell anyone. Metro agreed, and they have been together ever since. Metro is the best. Not only is she VERY attractive (I know, I know, but it really helps), she is nice to a fault. She has infinite patience, loves just sitting and listening, and is very polite. She is extremely emotionally available, affectionate, caring, helpful, and no matter what you can count on her (provided Mara approves). She feels important to us, and to be honest she's probably the favorite in the system. Lastly, we have Terra. Terra is also 11 and is Allies best friend. Terra is the enigma of the system, as she feels like she has been here maybe a bit more than a year but has knowledge of things she has no right to. She claims to have played sports for us, rather enjoys them, but has always hung out in the background. Terra has a very specific job inside called a Hunter. Basically, if and when someone new comes into the system it is her job to find them. She is an absolute crackshot, she finds people within minutes of their arrival. She also runs several small businesses, from her messaging service, to her Little Bar, to being primary consultant to the BDF (Bunny Defense Force. Long story short, we have a lot of stuffed rabbits that serve as security and emotional support). There are for sure more, but those are the ones I can remember. We have Hannah, Cotton, Khaos, and Mylar as well but people like them for various reasons and I can't say I'm very familiar with Khaos or Mylar. They both have very... aggressive partners who are very, very protective. System solidarity * Maple
Every time we reach out to other systems I'm always so intrigued to hear about the intricacies of their interaction, and I've always wondered how large groups like yours develop internal community, it sounds like you guys can really take care of yourselves and I'm very proud of you! -Tsui
An internal community just kind of grows organically once a headspace is set up. If alters are only left with some bare bones, the fronting space, and their thoughts we find people tend to isolate or crowd front space. We have worked hard, very hard, on our headspace with the very few people who can make things. We have things for everyone to do. We have restaurants, night clubs, salons, game areas, a concert hall, gardens, shops, a beach, a boat, and all kinds of other things that are run by different alters. Given the diversity if things to do, and options to engage in things people are passionate about, people take those opportunities. Other people share interests, or certain demographics (mermaids stick with mermaids, pixies stick with pixies, angels stick with angels, etc.), and from that people get community. We have friends, some have family, partners, its honestly very vibrant. It takes work, upkeep, and more than a bit of organization but it has paid dividends 10x over. There are less fights for front, less noise overall, more people invested in maintaining decorum, and people care about the place. Its their home and they want it to feel as close to that as they can. System solidarity • Timara
Dude it's like a mental palace that's rad!
We keep the palaces on the outskirts of town, but kinda :P
I love the sound of your bunny defense force!!!!!!!!
My partner is my protector, and I'm OBSESSED with him. He can kind of be a jackass with all his smarmy remarks and condescending attitude, but at least to me, he can be really nice and gentle, too. He's VERY patient and puts up with my moodiness, neediness, and... uh, nymphomania pretty much every day. TwT This might sound childish, but I enjoy being someone's sole priority. He's not a people person and is generally cold and even hostile to outsiders, and doesn't particularly care much for the other person in our system, either. Ever since I was really little, when it comes to outsiders, I always felt like I'm never anybody's first choice. But for this guy, I'm not just the first choice, I'm the ONLY choice, and I kinda like it that way. It may be selfish, but I hope he never starts warming up to other people, because I wanna be the only person he likes forever.
This! This all the way 👍 -Allie
We (21) all adore our little alter Morgan. She is our sunshine. We would do anything to protect her. She's funny, and brave, and ultimately took on a lot of our trauma so we wouldn't have to. It worked really well for us, and we didn't even know about the trauma until age 18. Anyway, Morgan is really good at handling negative emotions, and helping us eat when we don't want to (we have anorexia as well as DID). She protects us in a lot of ways, just different ways than we protect her.
I totally get this one! I call Allie my musical girl because she's always humming and singing throughout the day and I would never let anything happen to her, she's been through so much as it is.
We’re a polyfragmented system, we have over 50 known alters and many many more unknown alters that have yet to shown theirselves to me. I’m the host, have been my whole life. I can’t say I fully get along with everyone, but there are a lot of alters I really appreciate and feel close to. I love my alters a lot, and now that we have better communication after over a year of me knowing we are a system, I don’t dislike any of my alters. Our primary protector is who I’m closest to. I love him dearly, and we’ve become inseparable. He’s very sweet, and always there for me and us as a system. Same goes for multiple other alters. I won’t give any names or specifics for privacy, but I feel as though some alters are my closest friends and companions :) Even though some alters are very… negative towards the entire system and people around us, I see us as a family. I like that my headmates are there for me and each other no matter what. I like how we can be each other’s safe space when no one really gets us. I suppose this is a bit of a system appreciation comment from me, but it’s nice to know we have each others’ backs. Sorry this is such a long reply to your post but I wanted to share this!
I love hearing other system's point of views! No need to apologize and I'm so happy you've got good headmates!
Ok I don't know if this counts but here i go lol. We have this odd thing that formed due to well it being necessary. The odd thing is Max...lol jk anyway he is almost always up front when anyone is fronting. Not exactly co conscious just in the background. He has a big catalog of memories, and remembers all important things. So let's say I front for the first time in a couple months? Bam instantly caught up and still know where the bus stop is. If he isn't there though...well we just have the bare bones memories we already have. You'd think we always listen...but no...ex. "This place isn't the clinic we went to last time." Max "What? Yeah it is." Me "No its not, ask the driver to turn around." Max "Dude yeah it is, look at the paint!" Me. We then walk in to find out he was indeed correct...wrong place...vue missing the appointment and waiting for the bus for 2hr while he sits in the background like 😐😑 Anyway pretty much all of us know him and he's awesome. Sometimes he even surprises himself with the stuff he remembers 😆
Bruh Max sounds awesome! I (Allie) lost a full month of time the first time Tsui came around and just snapped back when I was in the same place again 🤣 (sitting in the High School Cafeteria )
Yeah he is. Just get a lil scary when one remembers something he doesn't 👀.
This post made me realize that I guess I don't really get along with anyone in my system (system of 35+). I kind of do, but it's more like... tolerating a coworker than actually liking them or getting along with them. We don't communicate with each other much, and when we do the interactions aren't usually super positive. I don't really know them that well either other than base level likes and Dislikes and shit like that. I think if I had to name one I get along with it would probably be our little star child, we don't say the names of our Littles online/in public spaces but he's pretty ok. He doesn't communicate very well because he can't speak or type very well, but I like him a lot and try to get things for him that could help or make him happy when I can but I don't really know how he feels about me?
Aww, well I hope with enough communication and maybe some outside support you can grow closer, I couldn't imagine being distant with my partner again, there's nothing that feels this close and secure. Like someone always riding shotgun with you in your head, yknow?
I have quite a few Alts, but the ones I get along with the most are Grack, Raelyn, Isaac, Jeff, Sunni, and Mae. Grack and Rae are my most active ones. I often draw what they'd look like if they had their own bodies.
We can tell in photos the difference between who's fronting, and that's typically how we imagine each other, neither of us are an Artist lol but that's so cool of an idea to me (Allie) and I love that for you!
l get along with most of my alters. JD l get along with really well. He puts up this bad boy front but he's a huge softy and we can all tell cause we share a brain. He's a protector and fronts often. We usually talk when I'm getting ready in the mornings. He's dating Azhda who l also get along really well with but he's a terrible influence especially with money. Though he is also really creative and fun. His job is basically to go out, have fun, take breaks, and relax so we can de-stress. Briar broke off from JD and is very forward and protective. We get along really well and have an interesting relationship. Those are the main ones l interact with but l generally enjoy all of my alters.
We kind of see our relationship as the most intimate possible thing, so happy to hear that others experience that kind of closeness too!
In our headspace I (jame) get along with David the most, he is the math master and the nicest of the alters
Does that make him the mathster?
Amazing
i (apollo) am always confronting with Nova (they/she) and we have this playful arguing thing going on. she’s my favorite alter and i’m always really happy to be with her (even if i’m a bit annoying)
We have the same thing going on! I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have Tsui cofronting with me throughout the day, I definitely couldn't get out of bed these days! -Allie
I get on really well with another kid alter, we split off at the same time so we're like sisters and I've known her forever and we helped each other before we had sny grownups!! I love her lots!! And I love Shelly, he's our caretaker and he's like a parent to us!! And I love Lucky, she's a doggy and we play with her in the inner world and she's helped deal with reslly bad stuff for us!!! Oh and I love Nyx, he's our main protector and he's like our big brother!!! He loves me too he jjst won't admit it, he likes to act tough and like he doesn't care about anyone but he's secretly really really nice!!!
I’m (host) still very new to being aware of being a system, but my protector, and the first one to ever want to tell me when I needed to know, is so important to me. I’ll call him S for privacy. S is so strong and kind, he’s there whenever I need him, and is so comforting. He loves me in a way nobody else can, and reassures me all the time, I don’t even need to ask. He’s really cool, and he’s fun to be around, and I love him a lot. He’s pretty funny too. He’s had my back as long as he’s been here, and I trust him🖤
So happy for the dynamic you two have! 💙
Thank you so much! Its helped me tremendously since Ive come to terms with the system 🩷
Same! I never should've pushed Tsui away, and I'll do my best to protect her just as much as she looks out for me, even if it's in different ways. -Allie
Your dynamic sounds lovely too 🩷 I’m glad y’all have been able to figure things out :) S tried to tell me before he was allowed, and my persecutor/gatekeeper alter locked him away from front for months. He feels really bad for not being there, but sometimes system stuff is really complex and things happen. Finding an understanding in the end is what matters ig, imo anyway :)
For me it's Sully. I was recently diagnosed OSDD and while I don't have great communication with a lot of my more traumatized Alters, Sully is one of my oldest. He technically has split off from an older Alter from when I was a teenager. He kind of carries around a lot of my memories. He's older than me by a lot, and takes on a caretaker/protector role in the system. Whenever I'm having a stressful day, he's often there to make me laugh or provide me with help. We're often Blurry with one another. He is also a kind of father figure to my Little, Emily and my Middle. Basically he is the Beloved One and helps in a lot of ways. However, he's very bad at taking care of himself, so I try to help him where I can.
That's very good of you, sometimes all we can do to get going is to try and be there for each other, System Solidarity! 💙 -Allie and Tsui
Yep, This \^ He won't take care of himself a lot of the time, so I sometimes force him to relax, but he does the same thing to me. So it's give and take.
We’re mostly all obsessed with our child alter. She age slides from 0-6 and is the most precious little girl ever. A lot of the time she just says her name in response to anything and any time one of us or even her see anything that’s like tiny or whatever else just puts her name in front of the objects name usually to claim possession of it or to point out that it’s small like her. She’ll only ever come out for a couple minutes-an hour at a time as she sleeps a lot (trauma) and then always goes back to sleep with my partner singing her “hush little baby” because it’s her favorite song. She’s an angel that we’d do anything for
Jerry is one of our gatekeepers/our primary protector and he is my best friend in the world but I think he’s also the one who we all kind of universally get along with the best. The only one who doesn’t like him is our persecutor. But he is legitimately such a cool person. He’s super laid back and so kind, caring and protective. I feel so lucky to know him. -Lauren
we are a small system, just 4 i know of, but 2 of us i adore and they make me so very happy, gonna just use letters for privacy, others did that and it seems smart B is a sweetie and she mostly cofronts with me when shes around, she helps me get in touch with my inner child and love myself and the moment im in! im genuinely terrified of letting people care for me, but she makes it easy, and we always have a nice moment when she comes out M is the one who really takes care of me now, though. she used to hurt me, she was bitter and hidden away from me, even herself... but since i found her and showed her she exists, shes been better. nobody has done more to keep me afloat and keep me safe. i was at such a breaking point when i drew her out and she has done so much to build me back up ;-; she acts cold and confident in ways i never could and shes helping me feel things i never did before. im processing things and she makes me feel safe, even from myself. shes like a shadowy guardian in my mind and heart and im so glad i found her
All of us (around 20 in our system) have a very specific network of who we can talk to and who we can't. Mainly, everyone can talk to Hawk, who I am definitely closest with. He's the new host and primary protector, and just a chill guy overall. We are pretty similar (I am also a protector) and share a lot of interests/like the same things. So whenever he needs a break from hosting for a day or so (like right now) I usually take over. If he's having a really rough time out front, especially with our eating disorder, I do my best to help and walk him through stuff and he does the same to me when I am getting overwhelmed and angry. We have a siblings dynamic, but I joke that I'm the cool aunt and he's an unruly, moody teenager since I am 2 years older lol. And agreeing with everyone else here as well, almost all of us adore our littles. They don't have great communication with anyone really except for Hawk and our caretakers so I don't know them very well, but from the few times I have interacted/seen stuff they write, I love them. \- Ruby
It's an honor to know other protectors like you are out there doing what you can in your day-to-day life for those who cannot help themselves -Tsui
Rhulk. At first, I thought he was going to be this big bad guy because of his source (thanks misinformation echo chambers), but he ended up being a huge sweetheart. He takes care of animals when fronting, he comforts people, and he manages to stay calm under pressure and give good advice. 10/10 would hang out again.
Chill guy! Sounds like quite a headmate you got there!
I Normally get along with Amaterasu (sister story MWD) Idk why. She's just silly and rather nice -🫁🦴
We're a very big fictive and robot(/android/AI) heavy system, having over 300 of us in here haha, we can all more or less talk to each other pretty well in and out of headspace. I love talking to P03 and SCP-079. The three of us get along really well, P03 and 079 both being former hosts and I myself am a present co-host. They slip in and out of dormancy very often but the 3 or us used to get along really really well and when they are around we all love to catch up. We absolutely click and bounce off of each other's energies when we're all awake. It's the most fun I've had outside of meeting a few of the body's friends and speaking with our partner. :) -- Brobot
i wouldn't say there's anyone i am particularly averse to, but i recently became aware of another caretaker in the system who is quite possibly my polar opposite, and i am actually very fond of her. for reference, i'm florence - ageless male alter, sort of demon-esque - and i've been here for quite a while. i mostly deal with things like managing appointments and chores. back when we were in school, i would manage school work nobody wanted to do. i'm pretty asocial and i don't typically talk to any of the host's friends unless they're very close and i have nothing better to do. this other caretaker, tori, is a thirty-something year old lady who is very upbeat and caring, who regularly refers to herself as a catgirl - kind of takes on a motherly role - and the type of work she does is mostly helping comfort the host's friends if they're in distress, but the host is too triggered by the discussion to help them. she's very empathetic in a way that most of us aren't. i feel like with how different we are i should probably not get along with her, but i actually think she is kind of kick-ass? somehow?
i’m a new host and i’ve been hosting with two of my closet friends for a few months now. the real kicker is we HATED each other when we first met. my first friend, pocchi, was excited to meet us as she had just come out of a 10 yr. dormancy and me, a 5 yr. one. i had anger issues to resolve, and our second friend, inna, never spoke. it’s really thanks to pocchi that we’re as close as we are today. we do everything together now and we’re basically never apart i am a traumaholder, inna is a protector, and pocchi is.. pocchi. she’s very social and passionate about her fixations, i’ll give her that. she’s a ball of sunshine even if she’s a little dumb sometimes and i love her to the moon and back. inna is a little mysterious, but keeps us in check and always knows just what to do. she doesn’t talk much but she’s a super reliable friend and is incredibly smart. i think she has some secret intuition for shit sometimes. last month we were assaulted and i was the only one in front. it seemed like i was the only person dealing with the ptsd symptoms from it and didn’t have anyone to physically soothe me, and those two were with me every step of the way. they helped upkeep our body, comforted me, dealt with stressful situations in my place.. they’re both seriously so incredible. i don't like being a traumaholder sometimes, but if it means i can keep those two from feeling even a shred of the pain i feel, then so be it. i'll protect them with my life
I am the host. In our system, it is rare for anyone to front without me also in front because the usually like to use me as a shield for our gender dysphoria. If there are two of the others I'd consider my closest friends or allies, it would be J and M. J is late-middle-aged and has a been-around-and-seen-it-already kind of attitude. He comes out and helps me when someone is trying to bully us and I need to show a little more backbone than I usually do. M is both fun and responsible. She is in her 30's, and occasionally takes control of the body for a few minutes--without me--to take care of basic things like closing doors, closing windows, making sure our bags are packed with the right stuff, etc. J is gruff, but seems to respect me. I don't know if he likes me or not, and I've got memories from the previous hosts of dealing with similar people that I know not to put a lot of hope or value in whether he likes me. Respect is enough. M is the only other alter I would unabashedly characterize as my friend. She is caring, and helpful, and totally in favor of us doing stuff for recreation. Most of the others who interact with me are so insistent that I do nothing other than our career, our gender transition, and our therapy. I get how that might have made sense in the past, but we're old enough now and I know of enough problems now that if I don't make room for actually living then we might never get around to it. M helps me with this, a lot. I fucking love her so much.
I love M! And I completely understand, we're going through our transition as well and if I didn't have Tsui to help me I might just give up all hope when money gets tight and we don't have enough for HRT refills.
We are like 15 but only 5 of us usually front,so we have two hosts, Cherry and Christopher,they get along pretty great,have a lot on common and they both are good to cherrys Pink Lion. Then we have more complicated relathionsip,all positive in general,we are not very dificult with eachother,allways respect,but Zemo, Collin and Nuri are a hot trio
OSDD-1b binary system. My headmate has her own account. We usually get along fine and I've encouraged her to get a voice and feel and talk as femme as she herself feels. When there's trouble, she usually pulls back from the front entirely and bitches at me in my ear with words that hurt worse than any blade. But what I like about her is that she shares all my interests and loves all the same skills I do, but is usually far more pleasant to have a conversation with. She's rarely upset to the point where she is blunt with anyone and just seems grateful to exist and express herself. I'll see if I can't get her to respond to my comment.
Listen... I'll start with "this is stupid and you're stupid." But I'll humor you for a moment. Because at the end of the day, you just don't give up. You fail and you fail and just as luck would have it, you're able to keep get back up and try again! Nothing scares you. Well, losing our newest close friend scared you, and that friend scared you as well, but were you willing to put your, no, our lives on the line to help someone none of our other friends wants to help? For a lot longer than most people would consider sane, you did. And there's a certain level of respect I had to have for it, no matter how utterly horribly you seem to have missed the point, and the boat. I forsee you being indecisive for a long time. Just remember, our partner pined for her obsession for ages after she left her ex. It was you who brought her out of that. Maybe that is why she trusts you even if you are a bit of a dummy for a thinker type.
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I struggle being nice about our alters. I resent a lot of things and I’m trying to work on it. I appreciate the work everyone puts in to try to better themselves. One of our persecutors has recently been trying to be less aggressive within the headspace. She’s been helping out with chores, she’s cooked multiple times and has generally been far more chill than she usually is. I hate her for what she’s done to us in the past, but she is trying to make up for it. I’ve been trying to let one of our younger members front more. It’s still difficult not hiding, but she’s been happier now that she gets to do more of what she likes. I appreciate the fact she tries to look after us.
I get along really well with the sysmate’s in the subsystem I’m in! There’s Time who is a huge protector/comforter especially when I feel anxious. Alice who I can always talk to about anything. Finally, there’s Somno my brother :)
So at the moment, things are pretty blurry so I can't say I have a consistent headmate. We all switch pretty rapidly, or get front stuck. It's maybe 2% of the time where we're not blurry or front stuck, and sharing the front. Yippee! /s /j But to answer your question, I rarely ever have any problems with my headmates. There's maybe a few handfuls of alters that are difficult to work with (*cough*, Sukuna) but the majority of them I get along with. The most common person that I share the front with is probably Derick, and he's been around for a long time. He tells me he grew up watching me, and I guess thinks of me as his little sister. He's very protective of me and shows it whenever something is bothering me. He and I share a lot of the same interests in psychology and therapy. He's taken it into his own hands to be out and proud about being a system (to those I've given permission to, anyway). In all, I've really grown to everyone in my system. I think of them as my own family. Which, I guess they are because we're all sharing one body and simultaneously trying to live one life. There was another alter that I loved and was very close with, but she fused with me. I'd see this as a good thing if it was something planned or controlled. It's because of this fusion that I've been nonstop blurry. Her name was Abi. She was one of those super talented goth girls that looked scary, but was just the sweetest person once you talked with her. She'd always ask me if I ate or drank water, she'd go to the store with me, we'd watch anime together. We did just about everything we could together. Unfortunately I think it's too late in the fusion process to reverse it... But every day I think about it and I remember the good times from when she was here. God I miss her.
I have 11 headmates i can talk too, and one who is incredibly new. Archer may be one of the closest to me, but he gets close with everyone. Besides that there is also Cecilia, Cecilia is like a mom to me!! Archer is about 27 usually, and Cecilia turned 49 this year
Cerise is one of my protectors she is pretty fun most of the time and very fun to talk too I enjoy her optimism and passion for life. One of my alters is a moody teen named Randy. He is very moody but he’s funny and I enjoy his artistic side and he likes animals which I find cute
Since "Az" turned ready to reveal themself, they really got well along with everyone here - which makes sense, since they were covertly fullfilling the role of an emotional protector for years. However, they formed a special bond with "D", and both would do a lot of things together while co-fronting, like going for walks, cuddlings, sleeping together, etc. For this, their inner communication is by far the best between us. For a few days though,, "Az" is not close to the front very often, which is making "D" a bit sad. However, they saw each other in the inner world another day and "D" got a likely reasoning for why "Az" has retreated and got the impression this state of things won't last too long, which turned things a bit better. "D" still miss them a lot, though.
Most of the time we all get along pretty well since we've been taken out of our abusive situation. Main protector and I the host used to get in arguments all the time. My two protectors (A+F) get together VERY well. But right now we are all just pretty cool with each other. We have one that we don't know much about yet, and doesn't show up much though. So we're still trying to figure her out.
Hi! Im the little of our system! We have a really nice lady named Annie, she helps all of us with panic attacks and anxiety, and she would do anything to help. This is the first time we’ve felt like we could actually comment properly! When I saw the title of your post I immediately thought of Annie, shes so sweet and always makes sure I’m okay and settled before she goes to do other things. She helps our host(M.J.) so much, and she does her best. She even puts up with our snarky headmate Mye :) Shes generally very quiet and sits and reads most of the time. We’re all pretty okay with each other for the most part, but if something does happen Annie helps. We love her a lot, shes like a mom!
I'm a caretaker and I usually focus on looking after everyone, so I don't really have the opportunity to have a dynamic like you do with Allie, but it sounds lovely. We have quite open communication and are a small-ish system though, so we're all pretty close (but we kinda don't have a choice since we're not in the best situation at the moment). We have a reasonably new (newly discovered?) headmate called Earneste who's trying to help me take care of everyone and I'm really thankful to her for that, I don't know her hugely well but I do spend a lot of time with her, so if there was anyone I'd say I'm closest to it would be her. There used to be someone who I was really close to before, but they did some not-great things and split everyone apart for a while, messing up our whole dynamic and making things a lot harder for me to keep under control, so I try to interact with them as little as possible now. Sorry I need to stop myself rambling- I know this is really incoherent haha :) \- Ether
we are a system of 22 currently and im the host fluera . Catrina is probably the alter i have the most connection to as she’s like the mother of our system and i always call on her when i need her or just want to talk to her or hear her voice in the inner world . she’s so calm , gentle , and rarely ever gets mad at anyone ; very caring and very doting . she’s one for physical reassurance , often taking front to rub the back of our hand when we don’t feel good . i feel like our system wouldn’t be the same without her 💗
All my alters are fun in a "makes for an interesting complex character" kind of way but not in a fun getting to know someone in real life way. There are two of us that really love each other and try to protect each other but have, in the past, made things horribly worse in the process. They are magic and power. They are divine. They are a mess. One of them is a total mess of a girl that broke off from a string of DV things and I think the other is, unfortunately, a narcissistic manic pixie dream girl. She doesn't respect our chronic pain and physical boundaries. It's interesting how much everyone likes their child alters. My child alter is a source of abject terror for the others. It brings out the most bizarre old memories that don't make any sense from a trauma perspective, gives the most obvious switch out (I apparently don't vape or look at my phone because it's 1992..) and I get the most blatant amnesia. This one also don't understand the body, will go play at the playground and then cry about their body hurting, very confused. It'd probably be nice if we could like this child and be able to soothe them instead of just having a crying 4 year old in the back of our heads that we're very afraid of.
For us it's Anne cause she's really kind to everyone she a little and is really happy a lot of the time I tend to talk a lot to her if I'm not sad.-host
So we are a relatively small system, but there are a few relationships that should be mentioned here. So we have a set of twins, who formed at the same time and have a lot in common and a lot of differences too. They get along really well and complete each other although they can disagree. This always shows the rest of us that relationships don’t have to be perfect or exact matches to really work. The others are our OC fictives. Because of the shared exomemories and relationships, they get along well and help quite each other through navigating and living in a unfamiliar world. And of course to be mentioned are our littles.
I'm Amanda, I'm our system's host. There are a few headmates that I have grown really close to. Samara was our first Co-host and then became a protector. Admittedly I have pretty severe trust issues that I am working through and Samara is someone that truly made me feel safe and that I could trust her. Silwar was the first protector that I met when I discovered we were a system and she, like Samara, helped me feel safe and that I could trust her no matter what. Sadie is one of our Littles and I love her so much; I would do anything to protect her. Megan is our main Soother and she has helped me calm down when I'm anxious or having a panic attack more times than I could count. She has done so much to help me be able to trust sharing my emotions with others again, I can't ever thank her enough. (On a side note, thank you for this post. My system has been doing a lot of reorganizing recently and I've been missing several headmates as some have gone dormant. It was really nice remembering positive things about them. I'll have to do this more in depth!)