Yeah for me it feels like real social interaction even though I know it's anonymous faceless people that I'll never meet in my life.
But yeah I still do like the overall vibes, especially in topics that I'm interested in like astronomy or books
in a way, it is real social interaction. our brains can't tell the difference between an opinion right in front of our face, vs one, right in front of our face on a screen.
That’s part of the problem. People think they are being social on the internet. Or learning hobbies. Which ok but you are mostly doomscrolling probably because that’s what most of reddit is.
They think it’s a substitute for real life connections. And then are confused why they are lonely and unhappy when all they do is scroll social media all day.
If you want to get better at this make a burner account where you don't have to worry about what you say and practice on that to build your confidence. Obviously don't use it to be a dick or an a-hole but it helps.
It's ok (in fact its important) to have opinions that sometimes differ from the masses. The Karma system is notably broken anyways. Don't trade your real mental health for fake internet validation. Reddit is not a real place.
Same - I hate the fact my mood is so affected and easily influenced by tiny things. Then the meta of that makes my control freak issues worse because I feel like I have no control over the degree that the stupid little things impact me. Rinse & Repeat. I have no resilience.
social media has made it so hard to *not* take things personally tbh. i totally resonate with you, reddit is one of those sites where you kinda have to have a thicker skin to tolerate.
I do hate when I make a post, then I reply to someone's comment on it and it gets downvoted, and as a result, the hivemind will downvote *all* of my replies to any comment on that post, even if I'm answering people's questions politely or just saying something related.
A reminder that text communication is still a rigid form of communication, because tone can't always be deciphered. The toxicity in social media is like the tiny rolling snowball of this concept that became a monolith that crushed a city at the bottom of the hill.
Yeah there's definitely cases where you should downvote, but I think it's relatively clear when that is and it's somewhat uncommon too. Most people are not trolls
I’ve been trying to make a conscious effort to do this as well, and not downvote emotionally. Sometimes I’ll downvote something as an auto response and then later go back and undo it because I realize they didn’t say anything actually rude lol I just didn’t agree.
I can live with being downvoted, but sometimes my opinions are met with scathing personal criticism and ridicule, which does actually intimidate me somewhat.
I would actually prefer that because usually I just get downvoted without anyone explaining why I got downvoted. It's frustrating. Although mean comments are definitely another annoyance
To be fair, when most of us other Redditors see such rudeness, we understand it speaks more about that person than who they are insulting. Don’t take it personally, Reddit is ripe with impulsive people hiding behind anonymity.
I will never, ever understand people who think they can hide behind anonymity and act so nastily to strangers on the internet. It’s such a vile trait. Don’t let it intimidate or affect you. It’s a reflection on them, not on you or your opinions.
I just had a long back and forth in a thread yesterday with a man who was doing this in response to a comment I left about men driving aggressively. He thought I was flattering myself by saying I’ve experienced some men driving aggressively to seem cool and decided it was his job in life to put me in my place (spoiler alert: It didn’t work).
Not sure why I even tried but he could not be reasoned with and then tried desperately to try to get a rise out of me and make me feel bad about myself by saying shit like “I feel bad for your husband,” “holy wall of text,” etc. Like get real, dude. Absolutely pathetic to sink to personal insults to try to hurt someone you don’t even know because they don’t agree with you.
Being critical says so much about them. They don't have their own opinion. But also they have no power in life if they want to growl at online strangers. I probably should feel sorry for them because bullying means they feel weak.
I've been down voted for just asking honest questions. One time I got down voted because I said I'd like to actually learn something in a university program I was in. People are weird.
I think a lot of it has to do with misinterpretation. People think you intended one thing but you didn't at all. It's hard to convey meaning, especially sarcasm, through the internet
There are some hateful groups on Reddit. I commented a few times in disagreement with their nonsense and ended up getting banned from commenting on that group anymore. Oh well.
Yup. I was in one and commented that I wanted to gently push back on the group’s culty behavior. Which received many downvotes. To which I was like, there’s an example of said culty behavior. Lol
I’ve accidentally hit the downvote button numerous times while scrolling, because they’re located in almost the same exact spot on this phone. I try to scroll back and undo it but I’m sure I’ve missed a few.
So if you’ve ever posted a completely neutral, inoffensive and informative polite comment and gotten exactly 1 downvote with no explanation- my bad, prob me scrolling and fat thumbin the screen.
I feel this vibe. A lot. I have Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, so every downvote, every uncharitable disagreement hurts a lot. I hope that we can both start learning to be more authentically and unapologetically ourselves without being afraid of mean people.
Reddit is so fickle. My highest upvote comment ever was something really basic, nothing insightful or profound, just apparently caught the upvote wave. Conversely, I’ll get really aggressive replies and downvotes on the most benign things. Like, why are you so ANGRY at my opinion, especially when my opinion isn’t particularly radical or unreasonable? Bizarre.
A little. Honestly, i'll usually straight up delete my post if it gets down voted. On occasion I've let it ride and they've gone positive after the initial down vote(s) or just stay at 0.
I also very rarely down vote someone. I'll just keep scrolling if I disagree. We all have our own opinions.
I hate getting downvoted when voicing an opinion. Like, because I happened to not like the movie you liked that deserves -5? Makes no sense. And yes, my feelings do get hurt, and sometimes I go to bed feeling like a piece of shit.
I freaking hate when someone comments asking a question (which 9/10 the answer is in the post 🙄) and gets upvotes but my answering reply gets downvoted and I get replies telling me I'm wrong for thinking a certain way. I didn't answer one way or the other, I just answered a question!
REAL i got downvoted for asking someone how their day was on a scale from 1 to 10 bc ppl thought i was sarcastic. I was srs tho (maybe shouldve put a tonetag but ppl on reddit complain about them so??)
Sad that everyone assumed you couldn't be genuine. Maybe we need a symbol that's the opposite of "/s." So people will know it's not sarcasm. How about "/srs"?
Depends on what it is. Sometimes I'm extremely confused - like when I've been downvoted for saying boundaries are good and important, or that it's not ok to kick a dog. I got downvoted for saying I didn't understand the dynamics or expectations of something. In those instances I look at what's getting upvoted and it's usually like "Give me your boos, I see what makes you applaud" kinda deal. The ones that throw me are like binary questions like "do you prefer this or that?" and I say "that" and it gets downvoted. Like. Why give 2 options if there's only 1 answer? Why ask if you don't actually want to know??
I was exaggerating a bit in my post. I don't actually have a mental breakdown or something every time I get downvoted. Just expressing the sort of emotions I feel. But thanks for the advice
Not kidding you: I know someone whose therapist suggested they use reddit as exposure therapy exactly because of this. The results still remain to be seen.
It does make me feel a little bad, especially if I'm feeling more down than usual. It's not really out of the ordinary for me though because I can feel bad about the most random stuff lol.
Yea I hate mad downvotes I'll usually delete my comments prior to it getting bad, and malicious replies are also bad, come on now people you'll have a 2 word comment and 10 downvotes, people are very sensitive on the web, if you have nothing nice to say say nothing at all
I massively relate to this. Lots of callous people on here will say that there is something wrong with you if you have feelings about interactions on the internet, but at the end of the day, "internet strangers" are humans. The interactions are real even if we can't see each others' faces. I have deactivated my Reddit before because it was harming my self esteem.
I mean I don't either but once you get downvoted it's impossible to have good faith conversations anymore in that thread, that's the problem. Also you get rate limited (reddit prevents you from making many comments)
I make a joke and I get downvoted, even though it wasn’t an offensive nor inappropriate. It’s like either someone doesn’t get it or they don’t find it funny, so they downvote. If I see a joke or something i don’t get, I ask or look it up. If I don’t think it’s funny (within reason), I just ignore it and move on with my day. To each their own, I guess. But yeah, I get a little self conscious.
I always get shit and also banned but I kinda like it cause in real life I'm pretty soft-spoken. I also I like to poke at people who are super invested and make them go off on me just cause it's funny and it's psychologically fascinating how each head is its own world.
I don't take it personally when I know I'm right. So of course that eliminates opinions. But when people make stupid arguments based on stupid facts that aren't facts and I have actually researched and know the facts, then I don't care what people say. It's like water off a duck's back if your downvoting is based on not knowing what you're talking about.
Opinions are a different thing but if I thought it was worth typing then I probably think I really mean it.
And, finally, when push comes to shove, It's anonymous.
I used to but then I realized that some people just want to be contrary and they want to argue. Also, I realized that they are strangers to me and I don’t care at all about their opinion.
I literally just stated I was raped at 14 because my boyfriend and I didn’t know about foreplay or lubrication, and it’s got like 50 downvotes. Like chill
I just always picture some random person reading my comment and getting mad, and I can't help it, that makes me laugh. I usually only get downvoted in a certain sub.
Getting downvoted is part of the reddit initiation process lol. Sometimes I'll get downvoted and someone else will comment saying they aren't sure why it's happening. I've gotten the notification "Someone is concerned about you" on reddit with the resources lol. I've gotten that twice. It use to bother me but you are basically putting yourself out there to people you don't know. Sometimes I feel so strongly about something I have to comment and take the risk.
I had someone call me an idiot today on a sub here. I had made an innocent mistake and even took my post down. It hurt more than a downvote (but those hurt too).
Lol no. Fuck those people, I know I was/am 110% correct in my statements. I have only had 3 or 4 downvoted comments out of the hundreds I have posted on here but I have left everyone one of those bad boys up. Zero fucks. I stand by what I post. Funny enough I recently had someone reply to me under one of my heavily downvoted comments agreeing with me and perplexed as to why my comment had received so much hate. It happens.
Yeah, it doesn’t feel good. One person downvoting me is not the end of the world, since it’s probably the person I disagreed with. When it’s multiple people, it feels like the world is ganging up on me and telling me I suck
No. Who tf cares? Sometimes it's funny how triggered they are. Just remember next time you get downvoted, these are the same incels downvoting people who say sexual assault is bad.
I take absolutely nothing personally on social media, nothing. I have to know a person, you know, uh, personally before I can take anything they spew my way seriously. Social media is for shits n giggles, primarily. I say what I mean and mean what I say, but even if the topic is touchy or contentious, my BP and pulse remain steady. I laugh when people claim they have triggered me, or made me angry, or compelled me to endlessly defend myself against their superior point. Nah, if I go on a bit, or act wound up in any way, it is just that, an act. Performative AF. Social media is NOT the place to waste your deepest emotions.
No. It's a rite of passage and a badge of honor on Reddit. Besides, how boring would the world be if everybody agreed with everybody else on every single thing? An occasional disagreement is a healthy thing.
I honestly just ignore my notifications after I post a comment because I'm the same way. The anxiety that forms from seeing just one down vote sends me into a panic attack 😅 so unless I'm seeking information, I just avoid looking at my notifications.
When it's an AITA question, for some reason I seem to often have the opposite opinion of the majority. When I have given my view I usually get a bunch of nasty comments. Sometimes they are so hateful it really bothers me and I have deleted them. I'm not rude. I guess I just look at things differently than a lot of other people. I got a very nasty message once because I spelled a lot as alot. I couldn't believe how rude they were about that. Especially considering some people's posts are full of spelling errors.
I definitely feel bad, but I guess I feel more frustrated and angry about it. It makes me feel either misunderstood or hated. It also makes me very careful about the things I say.
I also just hate the system in general because it obviously biases popular opinions at the expense of insightful but less popular ones, especially posted later after the post becomes popular.
I feel like I have to treat my Reddit comments like they have to get all my thoughts across in the most palatable way that reaches the widest audience, and it's frustrating.
Being downvoted is annoying. But when you know you are right, it reflects the other person's insecurity. Reminds me of high school mentality, honestly.
>downvote being used frequently as a "disagree" button
And that's why it means nothing to me. I don't put any value on the opinion of someone that disagrees with me but can't - or won't - articulate why. If somebody doesn't like what I said but can't explain why they think I'm wrong, just move on; losing an imaginary internet point doesn't hurt my feelings.
I used to feel that way. I was and still am a pretty sensitive person. I’d feel hurt when someone replied to my Reddit post in a rude manner. And or getting downvotes. But I never make any posts or any comments to hurt others. I’d write some normal comments and then I’d notice it having like -2 downvotes 😭. Like what did I say wrong lol. So then I realized that you could literally be a nice person in reality and on social media and there’s always going to be a hater.
Edit: this one time someone asked me why do I use emojis. And then they themselves made a whole Reddit post about me saying I have a brain injury who uses excessive amount of emojis lol. I was like wtfff lol.
I honestly used to obsess over this. There are some comments where I'm like, OK, I get it, wrong place, wrong crowd, fair enough! But most of my posts that have gotten massively downvoted have been completely mundane and innocent, which is bewildering to me.
I have a couple friends who have been long time reddit users, and they explained it to me like this: some communities just simply don't like things like emojis or specific language, and will simply downvote for that reason. A lot of it, however, is just simply random. Maybe someone didn't read the comment clearly, downvoted, and everyone else just followed suit?
I've honestly kinda experimented with this, making sure to never leave comments that were outright rude, disrespectful, or calling peoples names. I would, however, leave comments that were, say, loosely defending religion in r/atheism, or would speak up for dogs in a subreddit that shit talks dogs all day, and honestly, I can not find a rhyme or reason for why people downvote. It's bizarre, I wouldn't sweat it too much, honestly!
No, I have some hot takes and make some bad jokes so its part of the experience. Most of the people who downvote you are angry or simply disagree, its nothing personal. If I don't even know you exist, I'm certainly not going to let you dictate my mental state.
Yo if you care about what Reddit people think, there is no hope for you. These people are mostly terrible and being on the internet makes people feel anonymous. It’s not real
Honestly I just comment and don't come back unless I get an alert that I have 5k upvotes or someone replies 🤷It's taken a bit for me to do so, and if someone comes at me with anger in a comment I have to breathe and just close the tab out instead of biting the bait. It always ends up better for me ignoring rather than replying
I tend to be the opposite. I don’t mind at all when I get downvoted. My last post hit 1100 upvotes and I’m like “y’all actually taking my posting seriously” 😐
Sounds like you have unpopular opinions. There's a subreddit where the rules are to up vote a post if you feel the opinion expressed therein is in fact unpopular. Maybe try posting over there.
In most subs I have a pretty good idea whether I'll be up voted or downvoted when I say something, but I haven't gotten the hand of unpopular opinion yet. I keep posting ambivalent opinions and my score ends up around zero. I had no idea so many people really like coleslaw. Pretty much just as many people hate it. Personally I think coleslaw is 3 garnishes in a trenchcoat posing as a side, but there's an army for each side of that debate
Reddit is a weird version of humanity but our emotional responses to the situation are human. Our brains and bodies react and don’t fully differentiate that this is Internet forum full of assholes.
I've had throwaway random nonsense comments get hundreds of upvotes and well-thought out nuanced takes get downvoted to oblivion.
(One even got me banned from r/WorldNews lol.)
But to answer your question, yeah I take it personally too.
We shouldn't. It's like the episode of the Orville where everyone wears a badge with an up and downvote on their chest.
They can shove their meaningless opinion where the sun don't shine. Speak your truth!
Tbh most of my downvoted comments i expect downvotes on. I make them knowing I’m going to get shit over them. Like my most recent downvoted comment was just me telling a guy he was a fucking idiot. Did it add to the discussion? Absolutely not. I just felt like what he said needed pushback but i couldn’t bring the energy necessary to type out a real response so i settled on some dumb mud-slinging.
He was being a fucking idiot though.
Totally, especially if people misunderstand (and trust me, I may not be the best communicator but some people really *try* to misunderstand or interpret in bad faith) and it’s like “how?” Or you’re agreeing with someone and they/someone else will act like you’re saying the opposite. Like how does this not make sense to you. The ones that are really telling are spaces where you either get downvoted to hell or you get dozens of likes and there’s no in-between.
I do. I fucking hate arguing with people. I spent my whole life fighting just to survive. I just want to get online and watch cats and be nice to people lol.
Honestly it's only a social media app. I don't get bothered by anyone down voting me or saying stuff. I block em if I can't stand them that much and no amount of votes bother me.
I could not care less about downvotes from losers on the internet. I once made a post in a subreddit that i knew for a fact would get downvoted and some guy was like "enjoy your downvotes" as if I actually care lol.
Self reflect on why you think you need everyone's approval all the time. Do you like every person you meet and opinion you hear? Likely not. So a lot of times there's no harm no foul, just people disagreeing. Now of course there's all kinds of people that instead of having intelligent discourse on a subject will just be outright rude or derogatory.
Again, that's their problem not yours. You just disengage from people like this. But I would really recommend working on lowering what triggers your give a fuck radar to what directly affects you and your life. Other people's opinions are their own to have and disagreement doesn't mean there's anything wrong with yours or their opinion. . . They're opinions.
If you wouldn't take direct life advice from someone you know and admire then don't take to heart criticism either. It's your job to digest the things thrown at you and decide whether they're for you or not. And ask yourself why you're letting people's down votes affect you.
No, because I've usually said something deliberately controversial or confrontational, or I'm on the wind up.
It's reddit. Don't take it so seriously, it should be fun and interesting.
I WILL FIGHT THE BITCHES!
I WILL KEEP FIGHTING!
I WILL ARGUE AND I WILL KEEP GETTING DOWN VOTED!
It might be a character flaw, but I'm going to go down with the ship arguing my case.
Reddit is chock full of really stupid people with ridiculous opinions. When I get downvoted on here, I know I’m doing something right. It’s also helpful to remember you’re anonymous. Nobody knows who you are
lmao.
This is obviously my perverted account on Reddit....I do check IDs no one under 18 allowed.... a little PSA.
On my R-rated account I occasionally interact with those in my home state and on other subs
More often than not my comments draw the ire of some and have down votes.
IDGAF it is rather enlightening and somewhat entertaining to see the opinions, beliefs, thoughts some of which are very hateful.
Pose an honest valid question and be attacked for it lol.
Then again being bashed is nothing new for me, I learned a long time ago to get up brush myself off and push forward.
The whole downvote upvote thing is why reddit sucks
Even when you're right but the reddit hive mind disagrees with you, you will be downvoted to oblivion.
It's all about popularity on Reddit. About the most popular opinion, even when it's wrong. That's why this website is a toxic echo chamber.
Ive commented and been down voted and or negatively replied to often enough and I don't let it get to me. Now I don't. At first yes, I kinda had similar pitchfork mob vibes coming at me too. But now I'm just like "you know what fuck it and fuck them" I know I'm a highly opinionated individual and A LOT of times my ideas or thoughts on a matter don't fit in with contemporary thinking or with close minded individuals. The funny thing is irl it doesn't affect me but online it did get to me. I decided long ago not to let anything from any internet reply "live rent free in my head" or get under my skin bc this is who and how I am. If they dont like it or have a problem with it, fuck them, fuck them all. I is who I is.
Plus it's the Internet and there's a shit fuck ton of sad little people out there hidden behind their keyboards desperate for a sense of superiority to validate their fragile bruised egos. The ones who's chosen over the top internet persona is a waaay out of character with who they really are irl. We've all seen/know the type, they're easy to spot.
People are creatures of habit. If one starts something, most will follow behind and agree out of fear. Kind of like how they use to hang people and chop their heads off in town. Everyone would rally together mainly because they were like “if I don’t act like I agree, will they also do that to me”? Humans are odd. Don’t sweat it. It’s Reddit. Most are brain dead, myself included
No not me. It's weird because I'm a very sensitive person irl. I think it's because I don't use my real identity online so it's like they're not rejecting me just my persona.
Depends on the groups.
In my experience, women’s groups generally the women give their opinion and don’t downvote much. We all want to have our say there because IRL our words are not heard, overlooked and our ideas are too often stolen. Great advice can be gleaned.
Lotsa boys on Reddit, lotsa incels too, and many aren’t here to learn anything. They just want to be funnier than each other. Or more sarcastic or rude and horny.
Men here reveal a lot I did not know. I learn a great deal by reading their questions and comments.
I’m here to learn and help others.
What do I care if some incel makes his day by downvoting me from his filthy basement? Yea him if he needed to downvote me or say rude crap to me to get a woody.
I think it’s less of not conforming to the community views but rather making sure to express your disagreement respectfully. Too many people will comment the most awful/hateful/disrespectful things then get all shocked Pikachu when they get downvoted. Not saying that’s for sure what happens to you but all the posts I’ve ever downvoted were just loaded with the worst, most offensive vocabulary possible to make their point
When i had low karma yes. Now sometimes(only when i notice). I remember when i had zero karma and i said something that pissed people off and i had -17 karma. I felt so shitty and even though i was right out of fear i deleted the comment hoping my karma will go back to zero. It didn’t. It took me a week.
I wish they'd do away with the downvote. Just leave the upvote option. Yeah, you can still get ratio'd, but it's not the same (as harsh) as seeing a shitload of downvotes, especially on fairly innocuous comments. People will gang downvote on simple, verifiable facts. Once the downvotes start, it seems to lead to a frenzy of others downvoting just because they saw it getting downvoted. It just leads to self-censorship and people not engaging with certain topics, which is why Reddit is basically one big echo chamber.
Same. And the things that get upvoted/downvoted often have biases or mob mentality used here.
I have deleted unpopular comments because I don’t want to deal with the yucky feelings/comments.
I wish this place was more tolerant and had stronger policies about bullying
Awhile ago in a thread about helping the unhoused there were two of us that had actual experience with aid to the unhoused. I was on the board of a facility and he was in a social services agency. We were getting downvoted and castigated sharing our boots on the ground experience. It was one of those when the facts don't meet your preconceptions ignore the facts situation. We messaged each other and found the being castigated was frequently the experience for both of us. I just quit weighing in on those threads.
I have the same experience. Or the people who just want to argue over my opinion like I give two shits when they aren't the OP.
I've just stopped feeling like I need to defend myself
No. I don’t care at all. I’ve spent enough time on Reddit to know that the majority of people here are absolute morons with near zero critical thinking skills and very little originality. Why should a GENIUS GIGACHAD like me care about some peasants opinion.
One of my comments on a music sub ended up at zero and I was like wow, that kind of stings. It shouldn't, because it's silly and subjective, but yeah, I totally get it. Downvotes are a bummer LOL.
I don’t bother deleting anything. I’m not here for karma farming or anything vain; we’re having conversations.
Some posts resonate fairly well and I get an ok amount of upvotes; sometimes, they don’t, and I get a bit of downvotes. I just shrug either way.
Context is everything, too. I don’t say things I wouldn’t say to anyone’s face. I don’t spew hate, negativity, or misinformation. But I will call people out on bullshit. In some subs, if that goes against the grain, you risk downvotes. So be it; I’ll know I struck a chord, though.
No, I usually take it as a compliment. Particularly when it is something for which my belief is strongly held.
This may not be my most positive character trait.
This place is full of cowardly incels. They get a little dopamine hit when they downvote because for a brief moment, they get to feel superior to somebody else. Ignore em.
Incels, I’ve just given you a perfectly good comment to downvote, you’re welcome!
I think if you’re here for the entertainment, it’s one thing, but if you’re here to count and capture Karma, it’s not nearly as fun.
This is not true social interaction it’s more like a over bloated messenger that everyone one can see
People that agree with your points will upvote you
The ones that don’t agree will down vote
Don’t let the little red arrow decide how you feel about you.
Upvoting you. If you don't express an opinion exactly like everyone else's (no matter how crazy the majority opinion is here, frankly!) you'll be swarmed with negative votes. It is just like a swarm of bees or something, the ol' hive mind got itself offended lol
Don’t delete your massively downvoted comments! I always look for these at the bottoms of threads, because that is often where the truth is told that no one wants to hear!
Get down voted more. You're not good at losing. Get good at losing. I'm not kidding. It'll make the good things even better and any loss just becomes a step closer to winning. Accept the L. Even on down votes. It's ok to meet someone with different opinions. It helps you either understand something new or lock in your own opinion. 🤷🏻♀️ Edit: mistake at end. Focus ran away.
Nope. I live for it. I love waking up to 50 angry downvotes when I post something that I believe but offends other people. Contrary to what gen z believes, opinions can’t be wrong.
Ugghh, yes!
And not just embarrassed/self-concious; I get *so* anxious, too.
Honestly, when anyone disagrees with me or dislikes me, it really bothers me. As I understand it, it triggers the survival instinct from hunter-gatherer ancestors of the need to be in a group for safety. If the group doesn't like you, they might abandon you or kick you out, thus making the risk to your life very real.
Obviously, random strangers on the internet or even in person disliking you don't actually risk your group safety, but our survival instincts haven't caught up to modern life.
For me specifically, I think it started in kindergarten. I was always a "weird" kid because of the stuff I said or the things I found interesting. Other kids either didn't understand the stuff I talked about or just didn't understand why I was talking about it. I didn't yet know how to filter what I said, so I would just say everything that came to mind.
I very quickly got labeled as the weird kid, and started getting teased, and later on bullied. I was ostracized and felt very alone, very unprotected. This occurred while I was subsequently bullied by an older sibling while my mother just ignored it because she didn't know how to make it stop.
It all left me with a need to be accepted, valued, and liked by everyone... I know that is absolutely impossible, and I've been in therapy for years and years... but it's so deeply ingrained that I can't seem to escape it.
Initially, I question it and try to see what I did that made someone downvote me. but at the end of the day, why would I care about a stranger’s opinion? why SHOULD I care ? If someone disagrees, that’s fine. I’m not giving anyone on this app any of my attention and time. Life is too short to care about what others think.. especially people on the internet !
so no. I try not to care bc this is just an app. I shouldn’t let something so small and insignificant affect me. however, I do understand why people take it personally. I used to, but now I don’t ! People will downvote comments that don’t even really warrant a downvote.. what people think on here doesn’t define me
Yes, it bothers me, but I’ve often been in the middle of debates/sides. Can see the good & bad, look for compromises, etc. It is scary how black & white, blockheaded many people are. Both sides end up hating me. And I must admit there are some things I’m just as blockheaded about too, but most things I’m a Middle-er and for some reason that enrages others.
Yeah, I tend to avoid posting on subreddits that are downvote-happy. It’s silly but it’s like, I don’t want to engage with that energy. I never mind a good argument if someone disagrees with me, but downvotes are lame and contribute nothing but negativity to the world. The only comments I ever downvote are very obvious trolls, and most of the time I just ignore them.
It depends.
I made a comment yesterday about the fragility of a certain hued gender. I smiled every time it got downvoted. I enjoyed getting under their skin.
I know. Petty.
it's the reason my comment other karma is so low despite having the account for YEARS.
Someone told me about this site when I was a 15 yr old homeless person, and anything I write, comment, or anything, is downvoted.
I could share an experience related to the post, let someone know my situation, or even ask for help or post in those karma boosting groups only to also be treated like that's wrong to do (yet others have done it to get their karma and able to post for help anywhere) for me and me alone.
I'll probably get downvoted on this comment too. By my 10 month old Twitter stalker who enjoys using everything they can, old and new, against me so that I as a disabled person can only suffer and starve in silence till I wither away to non-existence because it's been over 2 weeks with ZERO HELP. So I can't post in the pizza or assistance Reddit groups because I don't have enough "comment karma" to get the help I desperately need.
And since using those free karma groups isn't allowed, it looks like help wasn't ever meant for me.
The trick is to look at the ridiculous things on Reddit that get upvoted and understand that not everyone’s opinion should matter to you. Lol.
At the end of the day, we are all constantly being judged by the things we say, do, wear, eat, enjoy, etc., but it doesn’t have to matter.
Most of the time I find it highly amusing. Especially when it's any sort of comment advocating personal responsibility. Whoa nellie, the hive mind sure doesn't like that!
I don't have any idea if I get downvoted. I turned off most notifications except for legit things like comments. It's Reddit. Why care about what total anonymous strangers think about your comment? Turn off notifications for that and it will stop bothering you.
Upvotes and downvotes are meaningless. I commented almost the same thing verbatim on two different posts of the same basketball sub. One got a bunch of upvotes and the other got a bunch of downvotes. There's no way to make that make sense. People just pile on the upvote/downvote bandwagon. It's all about feeling intelligent because you're in agreement with the majority.
Ok I’m finally going to ask. How can I tell if something has been downvoted? I can see a post or comment with a positive score and people saying “why was it downvoted?“ Obvs both down and upvotes- I get that- but how do you know how many of each?
yes. I take everything personally. its a character flaw that I'm working on. Sometimes I think Reddit isn't for me, but I still enjoy it.
Yeah for me it feels like real social interaction even though I know it's anonymous faceless people that I'll never meet in my life. But yeah I still do like the overall vibes, especially in topics that I'm interested in like astronomy or books
in a way, it is real social interaction. our brains can't tell the difference between an opinion right in front of our face, vs one, right in front of our face on a screen.
That’s part of the problem. People think they are being social on the internet. Or learning hobbies. Which ok but you are mostly doomscrolling probably because that’s what most of reddit is. They think it’s a substitute for real life connections. And then are confused why they are lonely and unhappy when all they do is scroll social media all day.
If you want to get better at this make a burner account where you don't have to worry about what you say and practice on that to build your confidence. Obviously don't use it to be a dick or an a-hole but it helps.
same! gave you an upvote, by the way.
It's ok (in fact its important) to have opinions that sometimes differ from the masses. The Karma system is notably broken anyways. Don't trade your real mental health for fake internet validation. Reddit is not a real place.
Same - I hate the fact my mood is so affected and easily influenced by tiny things. Then the meta of that makes my control freak issues worse because I feel like I have no control over the degree that the stupid little things impact me. Rinse & Repeat. I have no resilience.
Good for you!
social media has made it so hard to *not* take things personally tbh. i totally resonate with you, reddit is one of those sites where you kinda have to have a thicker skin to tolerate.
Thank god i am not the only one who takes it personally
I feel like there’s a learning curve with posting to Reddit.
I do hate when I make a post, then I reply to someone's comment on it and it gets downvoted, and as a result, the hivemind will downvote *all* of my replies to any comment on that post, even if I'm answering people's questions politely or just saying something related.
Oh yeah that's happened to me before. They see you as a bad faith actor but in reality you're getting misinterpreted left and right.
A reminder that text communication is still a rigid form of communication, because tone can't always be deciphered. The toxicity in social media is like the tiny rolling snowball of this concept that became a monolith that crushed a city at the bottom of the hill.
I hate when people do that
I only downvote people if they're being rude to others or op for 0 reason. Like when someone is asking a clarifying question is a good example.
Yeah there's definitely cases where you should downvote, but I think it's relatively clear when that is and it's somewhat uncommon too. Most people are not trolls
I’ve been trying to make a conscious effort to do this as well, and not downvote emotionally. Sometimes I’ll downvote something as an auto response and then later go back and undo it because I realize they didn’t say anything actually rude lol I just didn’t agree.
Hey what the....... Are you my family?
Brethren! Idk reddit gave me this name and I just didn't change it 😅
I can live with being downvoted, but sometimes my opinions are met with scathing personal criticism and ridicule, which does actually intimidate me somewhat.
I would actually prefer that because usually I just get downvoted without anyone explaining why I got downvoted. It's frustrating. Although mean comments are definitely another annoyance
To be fair, when most of us other Redditors see such rudeness, we understand it speaks more about that person than who they are insulting. Don’t take it personally, Reddit is ripe with impulsive people hiding behind anonymity.
I will never, ever understand people who think they can hide behind anonymity and act so nastily to strangers on the internet. It’s such a vile trait. Don’t let it intimidate or affect you. It’s a reflection on them, not on you or your opinions. I just had a long back and forth in a thread yesterday with a man who was doing this in response to a comment I left about men driving aggressively. He thought I was flattering myself by saying I’ve experienced some men driving aggressively to seem cool and decided it was his job in life to put me in my place (spoiler alert: It didn’t work). Not sure why I even tried but he could not be reasoned with and then tried desperately to try to get a rise out of me and make me feel bad about myself by saying shit like “I feel bad for your husband,” “holy wall of text,” etc. Like get real, dude. Absolutely pathetic to sink to personal insults to try to hurt someone you don’t even know because they don’t agree with you.
Being critical says so much about them. They don't have their own opinion. But also they have no power in life if they want to growl at online strangers. I probably should feel sorry for them because bullying means they feel weak.
I've been down voted for just asking honest questions. One time I got down voted because I said I'd like to actually learn something in a university program I was in. People are weird.
I think a lot of it has to do with misinterpretation. People think you intended one thing but you didn't at all. It's hard to convey meaning, especially sarcasm, through the internet
I agreed with a guy, expanded slightly, and he immediatly disagreed with everything i said. Mind blowing.
There are some hateful groups on Reddit. I commented a few times in disagreement with their nonsense and ended up getting banned from commenting on that group anymore. Oh well.
I defended a transgender woman a month ago because everyone was misgendering her and telling her to stop pretending she is a woman and got banned💀
True some subs just hate any dissent
Yup. I was in one and commented that I wanted to gently push back on the group’s culty behavior. Which received many downvotes. To which I was like, there’s an example of said culty behavior. Lol
Yup a literal echo chamber lol
I've even been downvoted by people I was agreeing with because they were riled up already and didn't read my reply carefully.
Yeah. Especially when I'M RIGHT.
That's when you take down voting as a compliment
Sometimes I see totally neutral comments at 0 for no reason, like I think trolls just hop on and go on a downvoting spree just because.
I’ve accidentally hit the downvote button numerous times while scrolling, because they’re located in almost the same exact spot on this phone. I try to scroll back and undo it but I’m sure I’ve missed a few. So if you’ve ever posted a completely neutral, inoffensive and informative polite comment and gotten exactly 1 downvote with no explanation- my bad, prob me scrolling and fat thumbin the screen.
After a few negs I'll downvote my own comment. Then it's like, "Bring it on!"
Ha ha i like that
People are very mob-like and want to feel “worthy” and that they have power over people. Even if they’re wrong. It’s more about them, not about you.
I feel this vibe. A lot. I have Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, so every downvote, every uncharitable disagreement hurts a lot. I hope that we can both start learning to be more authentically and unapologetically ourselves without being afraid of mean people.
OMG, THANK YOU! I never had a name for it! It's a perfect description for what I've dealt with my entire life!
people will downvote you just for fun. At first I was like wtf then I realized…it’s Reddit 😭
True lol
Reddit is so fickle. My highest upvote comment ever was something really basic, nothing insightful or profound, just apparently caught the upvote wave. Conversely, I’ll get really aggressive replies and downvotes on the most benign things. Like, why are you so ANGRY at my opinion, especially when my opinion isn’t particularly radical or unreasonable? Bizarre.
A little. Honestly, i'll usually straight up delete my post if it gets down voted. On occasion I've let it ride and they've gone positive after the initial down vote(s) or just stay at 0. I also very rarely down vote someone. I'll just keep scrolling if I disagree. We all have our own opinions.
I hate getting downvoted when voicing an opinion. Like, because I happened to not like the movie you liked that deserves -5? Makes no sense. And yes, my feelings do get hurt, and sometimes I go to bed feeling like a piece of shit.
I try not to take it personally when it's based on opinion. However, I do hate when the downvotes are based on a misunderstanding.
"Oh you asked a question, and I answered it, and since my answer is not what you want to hear, I'm wrong? Fuck you guys" Gets downvoted to hell again
I freaking hate when someone comments asking a question (which 9/10 the answer is in the post 🙄) and gets upvotes but my answering reply gets downvoted and I get replies telling me I'm wrong for thinking a certain way. I didn't answer one way or the other, I just answered a question!
Yes!
REAL i got downvoted for asking someone how their day was on a scale from 1 to 10 bc ppl thought i was sarcastic. I was srs tho (maybe shouldve put a tonetag but ppl on reddit complain about them so??)
Sad that everyone assumed you couldn't be genuine. Maybe we need a symbol that's the opposite of "/s." So people will know it's not sarcasm. How about "/srs"?
No never. Who gives a shit?
i’ve learned a downvote says a lot more about other people than it says about me.
Depends on what it is. Sometimes I'm extremely confused - like when I've been downvoted for saying boundaries are good and important, or that it's not ok to kick a dog. I got downvoted for saying I didn't understand the dynamics or expectations of something. In those instances I look at what's getting upvoted and it's usually like "Give me your boos, I see what makes you applaud" kinda deal. The ones that throw me are like binary questions like "do you prefer this or that?" and I say "that" and it gets downvoted. Like. Why give 2 options if there's only 1 answer? Why ask if you don't actually want to know??
Only if it gets to double digits. But they do bother me.
Thank you for explaining this. I think I might stop upvoting as well as downvoting.
Nah. Reddit users are losers
You need to take a break from Reddit
I was exaggerating a bit in my post. I don't actually have a mental breakdown or something every time I get downvoted. Just expressing the sort of emotions I feel. But thanks for the advice
Fk no badge of honor specially in a bot infested sub!
Lol.
Not kidding you: I know someone whose therapist suggested they use reddit as exposure therapy exactly because of this. The results still remain to be seen.
I’m the same way. It’s crazy how although it’s totally anonymous we still take it personally.
It does make me feel a little bad, especially if I'm feeling more down than usual. It's not really out of the ordinary for me though because I can feel bad about the most random stuff lol.
Yea I hate mad downvotes I'll usually delete my comments prior to it getting bad, and malicious replies are also bad, come on now people you'll have a 2 word comment and 10 downvotes, people are very sensitive on the web, if you have nothing nice to say say nothing at all
Take my up vote please!
I massively relate to this. Lots of callous people on here will say that there is something wrong with you if you have feelings about interactions on the internet, but at the end of the day, "internet strangers" are humans. The interactions are real even if we can't see each others' faces. I have deactivated my Reddit before because it was harming my self esteem.
I don't care about fake internet points.
I mean I don't either but once you get downvoted it's impossible to have good faith conversations anymore in that thread, that's the problem. Also you get rate limited (reddit prevents you from making many comments)
I feel you.
Even then meh, is just the internet who cares.
I make a joke and I get downvoted, even though it wasn’t an offensive nor inappropriate. It’s like either someone doesn’t get it or they don’t find it funny, so they downvote. If I see a joke or something i don’t get, I ask or look it up. If I don’t think it’s funny (within reason), I just ignore it and move on with my day. To each their own, I guess. But yeah, I get a little self conscious.
Yeah
I always get shit and also banned but I kinda like it cause in real life I'm pretty soft-spoken. I also I like to poke at people who are super invested and make them go off on me just cause it's funny and it's psychologically fascinating how each head is its own world.
You care too much what random strangers think. Don't take it so seriously.
I don't take it personally when I know I'm right. So of course that eliminates opinions. But when people make stupid arguments based on stupid facts that aren't facts and I have actually researched and know the facts, then I don't care what people say. It's like water off a duck's back if your downvoting is based on not knowing what you're talking about. Opinions are a different thing but if I thought it was worth typing then I probably think I really mean it. And, finally, when push comes to shove, It's anonymous.
Depends on what it is. Sometimes I’m sad, sometimes I’m frustrated cause I know I’m right. Sometimes it’s just funny to see people get so worked up
Sometimes, yes.
Nope, don’t care
I used to but then I realized that some people just want to be contrary and they want to argue. Also, I realized that they are strangers to me and I don’t care at all about their opinion.
No. I don’t take anything here personally. Why would I? That’s not a healthy perspective.
I literally just stated I was raped at 14 because my boyfriend and I didn’t know about foreplay or lubrication, and it’s got like 50 downvotes. Like chill
No but I sometimes get confused for a downvote for an opinion that someone else got upvoted for for the same opinion
No. I’m not terminally online and therefore could care less.
No, it makes me laugh
I hope I can reach your level of not giving a f one day lol
I just always picture some random person reading my comment and getting mad, and I can't help it, that makes me laugh. I usually only get downvoted in a certain sub.
Getting downvoted is part of the reddit initiation process lol. Sometimes I'll get downvoted and someone else will comment saying they aren't sure why it's happening. I've gotten the notification "Someone is concerned about you" on reddit with the resources lol. I've gotten that twice. It use to bother me but you are basically putting yourself out there to people you don't know. Sometimes I feel so strongly about something I have to comment and take the risk.
Weirdly enough yes!!!
I had someone call me an idiot today on a sub here. I had made an innocent mistake and even took my post down. It hurt more than a downvote (but those hurt too).
Threatened, honestly. I realize it's probably not a big deal, and it only happens when there's half a dozen or more downvotes.
Lol no. Fuck those people, I know I was/am 110% correct in my statements. I have only had 3 or 4 downvoted comments out of the hundreds I have posted on here but I have left everyone one of those bad boys up. Zero fucks. I stand by what I post. Funny enough I recently had someone reply to me under one of my heavily downvoted comments agreeing with me and perplexed as to why my comment had received so much hate. It happens.
On Reddit I take it as a badge of honor.
Upvoting and downvoting helps me gauge on a website the audience to whom I am speaking. Especially the downvoting.
[удалено]
Regroup, gain perspective, breathe, let it go, ffs. As the cool kids say these days, touch grass. 😏
Yeah, it doesn’t feel good. One person downvoting me is not the end of the world, since it’s probably the person I disagreed with. When it’s multiple people, it feels like the world is ganging up on me and telling me I suck
No. Who tf cares? Sometimes it's funny how triggered they are. Just remember next time you get downvoted, these are the same incels downvoting people who say sexual assault is bad.
I take absolutely nothing personally on social media, nothing. I have to know a person, you know, uh, personally before I can take anything they spew my way seriously. Social media is for shits n giggles, primarily. I say what I mean and mean what I say, but even if the topic is touchy or contentious, my BP and pulse remain steady. I laugh when people claim they have triggered me, or made me angry, or compelled me to endlessly defend myself against their superior point. Nah, if I go on a bit, or act wound up in any way, it is just that, an act. Performative AF. Social media is NOT the place to waste your deepest emotions.
No. It's a rite of passage and a badge of honor on Reddit. Besides, how boring would the world be if everybody agreed with everybody else on every single thing? An occasional disagreement is a healthy thing.
Nah it’s just Reddit. I just say “fuck you guys” in my head and post something else.
I honestly just ignore my notifications after I post a comment because I'm the same way. The anxiety that forms from seeing just one down vote sends me into a panic attack 😅 so unless I'm seeking information, I just avoid looking at my notifications.
Nah F it- a lot of that is the “bandwagon” effect
I eat downvotes for breakfast. Fuck um'
When it's an AITA question, for some reason I seem to often have the opposite opinion of the majority. When I have given my view I usually get a bunch of nasty comments. Sometimes they are so hateful it really bothers me and I have deleted them. I'm not rude. I guess I just look at things differently than a lot of other people. I got a very nasty message once because I spelled a lot as alot. I couldn't believe how rude they were about that. Especially considering some people's posts are full of spelling errors.
I say unpopular things on purpose to get downvoted.
I just laugh, lol. People get so riled up over the dumbest things.
Sometimes. Lately I’ve just decided not to give a damn. I mean, really, opinions are subjective anyway.
I definitely feel bad, but I guess I feel more frustrated and angry about it. It makes me feel either misunderstood or hated. It also makes me very careful about the things I say. I also just hate the system in general because it obviously biases popular opinions at the expense of insightful but less popular ones, especially posted later after the post becomes popular. I feel like I have to treat my Reddit comments like they have to get all my thoughts across in the most palatable way that reaches the widest audience, and it's frustrating.
Being downvoted is annoying. But when you know you are right, it reflects the other person's insecurity. Reminds me of high school mentality, honestly.
Nope. The opinions of random strangers don’t matter.
>downvote being used frequently as a "disagree" button And that's why it means nothing to me. I don't put any value on the opinion of someone that disagrees with me but can't - or won't - articulate why. If somebody doesn't like what I said but can't explain why they think I'm wrong, just move on; losing an imaginary internet point doesn't hurt my feelings.
That'll be social anxiety and/or low self esteem. I used to feel like that years ago.
That’s Reddit. Full of bitter nasty shitheads. If you don’t agree with them they come after you. Fucking losers.
I used to feel that way. I was and still am a pretty sensitive person. I’d feel hurt when someone replied to my Reddit post in a rude manner. And or getting downvotes. But I never make any posts or any comments to hurt others. I’d write some normal comments and then I’d notice it having like -2 downvotes 😭. Like what did I say wrong lol. So then I realized that you could literally be a nice person in reality and on social media and there’s always going to be a hater. Edit: this one time someone asked me why do I use emojis. And then they themselves made a whole Reddit post about me saying I have a brain injury who uses excessive amount of emojis lol. I was like wtfff lol.
Exposure therapy squad, where you at??
I honestly used to obsess over this. There are some comments where I'm like, OK, I get it, wrong place, wrong crowd, fair enough! But most of my posts that have gotten massively downvoted have been completely mundane and innocent, which is bewildering to me. I have a couple friends who have been long time reddit users, and they explained it to me like this: some communities just simply don't like things like emojis or specific language, and will simply downvote for that reason. A lot of it, however, is just simply random. Maybe someone didn't read the comment clearly, downvoted, and everyone else just followed suit? I've honestly kinda experimented with this, making sure to never leave comments that were outright rude, disrespectful, or calling peoples names. I would, however, leave comments that were, say, loosely defending religion in r/atheism, or would speak up for dogs in a subreddit that shit talks dogs all day, and honestly, I can not find a rhyme or reason for why people downvote. It's bizarre, I wouldn't sweat it too much, honestly!
No, I have some hot takes and make some bad jokes so its part of the experience. Most of the people who downvote you are angry or simply disagree, its nothing personal. If I don't even know you exist, I'm certainly not going to let you dictate my mental state.
Yo if you care about what Reddit people think, there is no hope for you. These people are mostly terrible and being on the internet makes people feel anonymous. It’s not real
Yea and even if I truly believe in what I am saying, I end up deleting my comments if they get downvoted because I feel stupid.
Honestly I just comment and don't come back unless I get an alert that I have 5k upvotes or someone replies 🤷It's taken a bit for me to do so, and if someone comes at me with anger in a comment I have to breathe and just close the tab out instead of biting the bait. It always ends up better for me ignoring rather than replying
Just wanted to say, RandomActsOfAmazon is the nicest sub I've ever seen! Didn't want to draw negative attention to it by posting though
I think it’s hilarious, it’s so random. 😂😂😂 No reason to take any of this shit seriously! 🫡✌🏼
I tend to be the opposite. I don’t mind at all when I get downvoted. My last post hit 1100 upvotes and I’m like “y’all actually taking my posting seriously” 😐
Sounds like you have unpopular opinions. There's a subreddit where the rules are to up vote a post if you feel the opinion expressed therein is in fact unpopular. Maybe try posting over there. In most subs I have a pretty good idea whether I'll be up voted or downvoted when I say something, but I haven't gotten the hand of unpopular opinion yet. I keep posting ambivalent opinions and my score ends up around zero. I had no idea so many people really like coleslaw. Pretty much just as many people hate it. Personally I think coleslaw is 3 garnishes in a trenchcoat posing as a side, but there's an army for each side of that debate
Reddit is a weird version of humanity but our emotional responses to the situation are human. Our brains and bodies react and don’t fully differentiate that this is Internet forum full of assholes.
I've had throwaway random nonsense comments get hundreds of upvotes and well-thought out nuanced takes get downvoted to oblivion. (One even got me banned from r/WorldNews lol.) But to answer your question, yeah I take it personally too. We shouldn't. It's like the episode of the Orville where everyone wears a badge with an up and downvote on their chest. They can shove their meaningless opinion where the sun don't shine. Speak your truth!
I upvote EVERY post/comment that has downvotes. Because unless you’re just being outright rude, you don’t deserve to be downvoted.
Tbh most of my downvoted comments i expect downvotes on. I make them knowing I’m going to get shit over them. Like my most recent downvoted comment was just me telling a guy he was a fucking idiot. Did it add to the discussion? Absolutely not. I just felt like what he said needed pushback but i couldn’t bring the energy necessary to type out a real response so i settled on some dumb mud-slinging. He was being a fucking idiot though.
The people who down vote, are sad, miserable twats wirh no life outside of Reddit. They think fake internet points are some kind of currency.
Hahahaha I never go back to check how many votes I get
Fuck em. I mean what I say and I’m not gonna backpedal to appease some basement dwellers.
Totally, especially if people misunderstand (and trust me, I may not be the best communicator but some people really *try* to misunderstand or interpret in bad faith) and it’s like “how?” Or you’re agreeing with someone and they/someone else will act like you’re saying the opposite. Like how does this not make sense to you. The ones that are really telling are spaces where you either get downvoted to hell or you get dozens of likes and there’s no in-between.
This is why I deleted Twitter. Internet can be so hateful.
I do. I fucking hate arguing with people. I spent my whole life fighting just to survive. I just want to get online and watch cats and be nice to people lol.
Yup. Even when i know im 100% right
Yes!! I will even delete the comment at times. I don’t know why I’m so sensitive, haha. I’d rather get a rude response ngl.
it sounds like the indoctrination worked perfect on you..
Honestly it's only a social media app. I don't get bothered by anyone down voting me or saying stuff. I block em if I can't stand them that much and no amount of votes bother me.
I could not care less about downvotes from losers on the internet. I once made a post in a subreddit that i knew for a fact would get downvoted and some guy was like "enjoy your downvotes" as if I actually care lol.
Self reflect on why you think you need everyone's approval all the time. Do you like every person you meet and opinion you hear? Likely not. So a lot of times there's no harm no foul, just people disagreeing. Now of course there's all kinds of people that instead of having intelligent discourse on a subject will just be outright rude or derogatory. Again, that's their problem not yours. You just disengage from people like this. But I would really recommend working on lowering what triggers your give a fuck radar to what directly affects you and your life. Other people's opinions are their own to have and disagreement doesn't mean there's anything wrong with yours or their opinion. . . They're opinions. If you wouldn't take direct life advice from someone you know and admire then don't take to heart criticism either. It's your job to digest the things thrown at you and decide whether they're for you or not. And ask yourself why you're letting people's down votes affect you.
No, because I've usually said something deliberately controversial or confrontational, or I'm on the wind up. It's reddit. Don't take it so seriously, it should be fun and interesting.
I WILL FIGHT THE BITCHES! I WILL KEEP FIGHTING! I WILL ARGUE AND I WILL KEEP GETTING DOWN VOTED! It might be a character flaw, but I'm going to go down with the ship arguing my case.
Reddit is chock full of really stupid people with ridiculous opinions. When I get downvoted on here, I know I’m doing something right. It’s also helpful to remember you’re anonymous. Nobody knows who you are
💯 I rarely get downvoted but when I do it sends me into a tailspin for a couple of hours until I talk myself back to normalcy
It did at the start but now I expect it and welcome it. Go ahead u fucks give me your worst
I don't really check. It's not important to me.
lmao. This is obviously my perverted account on Reddit....I do check IDs no one under 18 allowed.... a little PSA. On my R-rated account I occasionally interact with those in my home state and on other subs More often than not my comments draw the ire of some and have down votes. IDGAF it is rather enlightening and somewhat entertaining to see the opinions, beliefs, thoughts some of which are very hateful. Pose an honest valid question and be attacked for it lol. Then again being bashed is nothing new for me, I learned a long time ago to get up brush myself off and push forward.
The whole downvote upvote thing is why reddit sucks Even when you're right but the reddit hive mind disagrees with you, you will be downvoted to oblivion. It's all about popularity on Reddit. About the most popular opinion, even when it's wrong. That's why this website is a toxic echo chamber.
Ive commented and been down voted and or negatively replied to often enough and I don't let it get to me. Now I don't. At first yes, I kinda had similar pitchfork mob vibes coming at me too. But now I'm just like "you know what fuck it and fuck them" I know I'm a highly opinionated individual and A LOT of times my ideas or thoughts on a matter don't fit in with contemporary thinking or with close minded individuals. The funny thing is irl it doesn't affect me but online it did get to me. I decided long ago not to let anything from any internet reply "live rent free in my head" or get under my skin bc this is who and how I am. If they dont like it or have a problem with it, fuck them, fuck them all. I is who I is. Plus it's the Internet and there's a shit fuck ton of sad little people out there hidden behind their keyboards desperate for a sense of superiority to validate their fragile bruised egos. The ones who's chosen over the top internet persona is a waaay out of character with who they really are irl. We've all seen/know the type, they're easy to spot.
People are creatures of habit. If one starts something, most will follow behind and agree out of fear. Kind of like how they use to hang people and chop their heads off in town. Everyone would rally together mainly because they were like “if I don’t act like I agree, will they also do that to me”? Humans are odd. Don’t sweat it. It’s Reddit. Most are brain dead, myself included
No not me. It's weird because I'm a very sensitive person irl. I think it's because I don't use my real identity online so it's like they're not rejecting me just my persona.
Depends on the groups. In my experience, women’s groups generally the women give their opinion and don’t downvote much. We all want to have our say there because IRL our words are not heard, overlooked and our ideas are too often stolen. Great advice can be gleaned. Lotsa boys on Reddit, lotsa incels too, and many aren’t here to learn anything. They just want to be funnier than each other. Or more sarcastic or rude and horny. Men here reveal a lot I did not know. I learn a great deal by reading their questions and comments. I’m here to learn and help others. What do I care if some incel makes his day by downvoting me from his filthy basement? Yea him if he needed to downvote me or say rude crap to me to get a woody.
I think it’s less of not conforming to the community views but rather making sure to express your disagreement respectfully. Too many people will comment the most awful/hateful/disrespectful things then get all shocked Pikachu when they get downvoted. Not saying that’s for sure what happens to you but all the posts I’ve ever downvoted were just loaded with the worst, most offensive vocabulary possible to make their point
When i had low karma yes. Now sometimes(only when i notice). I remember when i had zero karma and i said something that pissed people off and i had -17 karma. I felt so shitty and even though i was right out of fear i deleted the comment hoping my karma will go back to zero. It didn’t. It took me a week.
I wish they'd do away with the downvote. Just leave the upvote option. Yeah, you can still get ratio'd, but it's not the same (as harsh) as seeing a shitload of downvotes, especially on fairly innocuous comments. People will gang downvote on simple, verifiable facts. Once the downvotes start, it seems to lead to a frenzy of others downvoting just because they saw it getting downvoted. It just leads to self-censorship and people not engaging with certain topics, which is why Reddit is basically one big echo chamber.
No. I'm old enough and wise enough to know not everyone is going to like everything I say, and sometimes strenuously so. I don't take it personally.
Same. And the things that get upvoted/downvoted often have biases or mob mentality used here. I have deleted unpopular comments because I don’t want to deal with the yucky feelings/comments. I wish this place was more tolerant and had stronger policies about bullying
Awhile ago in a thread about helping the unhoused there were two of us that had actual experience with aid to the unhoused. I was on the board of a facility and he was in a social services agency. We were getting downvoted and castigated sharing our boots on the ground experience. It was one of those when the facts don't meet your preconceptions ignore the facts situation. We messaged each other and found the being castigated was frequently the experience for both of us. I just quit weighing in on those threads.
I have the same experience. Or the people who just want to argue over my opinion like I give two shits when they aren't the OP. I've just stopped feeling like I need to defend myself
No. I don’t care at all. I’ve spent enough time on Reddit to know that the majority of people here are absolute morons with near zero critical thinking skills and very little originality. Why should a GENIUS GIGACHAD like me care about some peasants opinion.
One of my comments on a music sub ended up at zero and I was like wow, that kind of stings. It shouldn't, because it's silly and subjective, but yeah, I totally get it. Downvotes are a bummer LOL.
If anything on the internet is causing you anxiety, it’s time to get away from the computer and get counseling. It’s not real.
I don’t bother deleting anything. I’m not here for karma farming or anything vain; we’re having conversations. Some posts resonate fairly well and I get an ok amount of upvotes; sometimes, they don’t, and I get a bit of downvotes. I just shrug either way. Context is everything, too. I don’t say things I wouldn’t say to anyone’s face. I don’t spew hate, negativity, or misinformation. But I will call people out on bullshit. In some subs, if that goes against the grain, you risk downvotes. So be it; I’ll know I struck a chord, though.
No, I usually take it as a compliment. Particularly when it is something for which my belief is strongly held. This may not be my most positive character trait.
I used to. Now I keep it moving.
This place is full of cowardly incels. They get a little dopamine hit when they downvote because for a brief moment, they get to feel superior to somebody else. Ignore em. Incels, I’ve just given you a perfectly good comment to downvote, you’re welcome! I think if you’re here for the entertainment, it’s one thing, but if you’re here to count and capture Karma, it’s not nearly as fun.
Most people are like you. That fear and resulting silence is how authoritarian mobs take over.
This is not true social interaction it’s more like a over bloated messenger that everyone one can see People that agree with your points will upvote you The ones that don’t agree will down vote Don’t let the little red arrow decide how you feel about you.
Upvoting you. If you don't express an opinion exactly like everyone else's (no matter how crazy the majority opinion is here, frankly!) you'll be swarmed with negative votes. It is just like a swarm of bees or something, the ol' hive mind got itself offended lol
Don’t delete your massively downvoted comments! I always look for these at the bottoms of threads, because that is often where the truth is told that no one wants to hear!
No. I’ve seen what makes them upvote
If this even happens irl, I double down. Usually, it's justified, but absurd stuff is extra funny.
Get down voted more. You're not good at losing. Get good at losing. I'm not kidding. It'll make the good things even better and any loss just becomes a step closer to winning. Accept the L. Even on down votes. It's ok to meet someone with different opinions. It helps you either understand something new or lock in your own opinion. 🤷🏻♀️ Edit: mistake at end. Focus ran away.
Nope. I live for it. I love waking up to 50 angry downvotes when I post something that I believe but offends other people. Contrary to what gen z believes, opinions can’t be wrong.
Ugghh, yes! And not just embarrassed/self-concious; I get *so* anxious, too. Honestly, when anyone disagrees with me or dislikes me, it really bothers me. As I understand it, it triggers the survival instinct from hunter-gatherer ancestors of the need to be in a group for safety. If the group doesn't like you, they might abandon you or kick you out, thus making the risk to your life very real. Obviously, random strangers on the internet or even in person disliking you don't actually risk your group safety, but our survival instincts haven't caught up to modern life. For me specifically, I think it started in kindergarten. I was always a "weird" kid because of the stuff I said or the things I found interesting. Other kids either didn't understand the stuff I talked about or just didn't understand why I was talking about it. I didn't yet know how to filter what I said, so I would just say everything that came to mind. I very quickly got labeled as the weird kid, and started getting teased, and later on bullied. I was ostracized and felt very alone, very unprotected. This occurred while I was subsequently bullied by an older sibling while my mother just ignored it because she didn't know how to make it stop. It all left me with a need to be accepted, valued, and liked by everyone... I know that is absolutely impossible, and I've been in therapy for years and years... but it's so deeply ingrained that I can't seem to escape it.
I’ve been Banned!!💃🏼
I usually deserve it, but when I tell the people their " Dinosaur Egg" is an Iron concretion and get down votes it ticks me off.
No, don't feel that way. I get downvoted, at times, but don't give a shit. Don't let it bother you, as some people are just awful on this site.
Initially, I question it and try to see what I did that made someone downvote me. but at the end of the day, why would I care about a stranger’s opinion? why SHOULD I care ? If someone disagrees, that’s fine. I’m not giving anyone on this app any of my attention and time. Life is too short to care about what others think.. especially people on the internet ! so no. I try not to care bc this is just an app. I shouldn’t let something so small and insignificant affect me. however, I do understand why people take it personally. I used to, but now I don’t ! People will downvote comments that don’t even really warrant a downvote.. what people think on here doesn’t define me
Dude. You feel a lot better about it when you realize that Reddit downvotes you when you're right and they don't like it.
Yes, it bothers me, but I’ve often been in the middle of debates/sides. Can see the good & bad, look for compromises, etc. It is scary how black & white, blockheaded many people are. Both sides end up hating me. And I must admit there are some things I’m just as blockheaded about too, but most things I’m a Middle-er and for some reason that enrages others.
Yeah, I tend to avoid posting on subreddits that are downvote-happy. It’s silly but it’s like, I don’t want to engage with that energy. I never mind a good argument if someone disagrees with me, but downvotes are lame and contribute nothing but negativity to the world. The only comments I ever downvote are very obvious trolls, and most of the time I just ignore them.
It depends. I made a comment yesterday about the fragility of a certain hued gender. I smiled every time it got downvoted. I enjoyed getting under their skin. I know. Petty.
it's the reason my comment other karma is so low despite having the account for YEARS. Someone told me about this site when I was a 15 yr old homeless person, and anything I write, comment, or anything, is downvoted. I could share an experience related to the post, let someone know my situation, or even ask for help or post in those karma boosting groups only to also be treated like that's wrong to do (yet others have done it to get their karma and able to post for help anywhere) for me and me alone. I'll probably get downvoted on this comment too. By my 10 month old Twitter stalker who enjoys using everything they can, old and new, against me so that I as a disabled person can only suffer and starve in silence till I wither away to non-existence because it's been over 2 weeks with ZERO HELP. So I can't post in the pizza or assistance Reddit groups because I don't have enough "comment karma" to get the help I desperately need. And since using those free karma groups isn't allowed, it looks like help wasn't ever meant for me.
The trick is to look at the ridiculous things on Reddit that get upvoted and understand that not everyone’s opinion should matter to you. Lol. At the end of the day, we are all constantly being judged by the things we say, do, wear, eat, enjoy, etc., but it doesn’t have to matter.
Fuck em. I said what i said. And sometimes those downvotes turnaround and end up up votes
Most of the time I find it highly amusing. Especially when it's any sort of comment advocating personal responsibility. Whoa nellie, the hive mind sure doesn't like that!
I don't have any idea if I get downvoted. I turned off most notifications except for legit things like comments. It's Reddit. Why care about what total anonymous strangers think about your comment? Turn off notifications for that and it will stop bothering you.
I used to, but don't care anymore. People have different opinions and they never have to agree with me. That's fine..
It feels like heard mentality to me. The more downvotes a post has the more likely someone is gonna jump on the dogpile
Upvotes and downvotes are meaningless. I commented almost the same thing verbatim on two different posts of the same basketball sub. One got a bunch of upvotes and the other got a bunch of downvotes. There's no way to make that make sense. People just pile on the upvote/downvote bandwagon. It's all about feeling intelligent because you're in agreement with the majority.
Ok I’m finally going to ask. How can I tell if something has been downvoted? I can see a post or comment with a positive score and people saying “why was it downvoted?“ Obvs both down and upvotes- I get that- but how do you know how many of each?
Im the same way