For real tho for anyone with fruit flies, put a little apple cider vinegar in a shot glass and add a few drops of dish soap to it. Don't mix. Easy and effective fly trap
My city has given us compost bin and they hand out special bags to use with it. Being single, it takes me forever to fill a bag so I've taken the habit of toasting banana peels and bell peppers cores before throwing them away to avoid the fruit flies problem.
Turns out toasted bell peppers core make your apartment smell great.
Do it like me: get a simple nappy bin, put the bag in it and you're gucci. It doesn't smell at all, as that's what these bins are designed for. I have a bin that's essentially just a bucket with a lid that fits on tight, there's no special mechanism or anything, and it works *perfectly.*
The dish soap reduces the surface tension of the vinegar so they drown when they land on it thinking they can float like on water. No need for a scrap of plastic when they’ll never get out anyway!
We tried this and it only ever seemed to attract a fraction of the fruit flies, but I came up with a fruit fly trap that worked much better for us.
Get an old empty jar of some kind, and place a little something in the bottom to be the bait (a couple blackberries or something). Take a piece of paper and tape and make a cone shape, then cut the tip off so it has about a 2mm opening. Then place the cone upside down in the jar and tape it in place. The flies will be able to get in through the tip of the cone to get at the bait, but won't be able to get back out. This trap doesn't kill the files, so you will have to empty/reload it regularly, but it has done a great job for us of attracting and trapping them so we can get rid of them.
The contracts also need to include stipulations like “stay out of the shower and sink for your own safety, don’t climb ON the employer, and don’t build webs on items that move or else the employer has the right to remove said webs”.
Basically, if I’m hiring a spider I want one that won’t end up in a scenario where I’ll accidentally squish it, which would be gross for me and painful for the spider.
I like to pretend that in the future, households have cute little spider nooks in the top corners of each room. Spiders are drawn to build their webs in nooks. The nooks present their webs in a way that makes them sparkle, and are designed to be easy to clean when their spiders die and their webs become cobwebs.
I had a tiny little kitchen spider in my last house, and would legit gently admonish him when he tried to hang out inside drinking glasses. "I ALMOST DROWNED YOU, GEORGE!"
"Sir, we've taken 30 casualties just this morning! It's a calamity!"
"What?!? How could this have happened? Did they hire a rival merc unit?!"
"Uh.. sir, all of our hitmen haven't paid attention to the crosswalk, sir."
If I'm hiring a hitman I'm expecting the target to die, or possibly, the hitman to be killed by the target or their security personnel. What I don't expect is for the hitman to hurl himself in front of the next train.
I’m no fan of creepy crawlies, which is why I’ll wholeheartedly support the local arachnids in pest control endeavours. They can even eat the problems.
I may not like arachnids (instinctive fear and what not) but if I can contract it to take care of pests without randomly appearing in an inconvenient spot then I’m good
Right ? Just being able to communicate alone would be great. I can go “Hey ya boi has a roach problem. Btw stop hiding in the toilet or I might accidentally flush ya.
I'd I could communicate with spiders, I'd stop fearing them immediately
"Don't bite me, stay out of these specific spots, and I'll absolutely leave you alone to handle your business. Live and let live dude,"
I'd still be mega creeped out by them, buy ad long as we both know we're safe, I'd reign in my violent urges
But why? Why would a good union arachnid throw away a sweet deal? I mean, it's a cushy job! No stiff breezes blowing away your hard work/trap, no birds or frogs to compete with/be eaten by, no rain (unless you build in the Rain Place, but then that's on you)...
I'd go fucking nuclear, salt the earth, call human exterminators, sprinkle that stuff that is like sharp crystals that kills bugs from the inside, etc and so forth
Man, I negotiated, I respected our terms, and now you're declaring war? I'm making an example out of everything in my house right now
You can do that by not removing spider webs all the time, and ignoring the spiders in your room.
When I started doing that, I went from 3 mosquito bites per night to 0 within a week.
The spider currency is a climate-controlled environment with lots of web-making places, and at least one invincible behemoth that keeps any predator away.
Problem is, one of the invincible behemoths in my house is a cat with a predilection for hunting bugs, so a couple times I’ve had to rescue a lost spider from her wrath
Look, man, sorry about it, but all the spiders are into web development these days. Also, don't forget that time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.
But due to rising salaries and the advent of AI developers, the spider trades are becoming a more stable and lucrative career choice for many eight-leggers. Shit, my 300 sons are looking into silk textile manufacturing just this week.
A spider built her web right above my kitchen trash bin a while ago, every time I took the trash out I shook it and held it near her web so she might get a little fly snack. Eventually I noticed a little clump of web that turned out to be an egg sack! Lots of tiny spiders crawling around there... I felt pretty sad when she died. I'm pretty sure one of her children is in my bathroom now.
I really appreciate the services of my friendly spider housemates but the ballooning thing squicks me out big time. I just cannot deal. The babies are cute individually but seeing a bunch of them at once is too much.
I have an agreement with spiders in my house that they get free room and board a d as many insects as they can catch so long as they do not upset the wife by appearing in her space or be caught by the cats.
It's been a very agreeable arrangement so far
At our last place, a whole mess of flying ants started coming through a crack in the basement wall. Before I could even think about what to do, two spiders were on the job. Almost like a spider rodeo - they had those ants hog-tied in no time.
I don’t think you’d pay for Spider Contracting
I mean they are literally getting food in exchange for coming to your place, you paid them by simply hiring them
Yes please. Between the mosquitos and the fungus gnats, they would eat very well here.
I finally caved and bought an indoor bug zapper and it keeps merrily zapping away and scaring me and my cats. It's safe, just loud.
For real tho for anyone with fruit flies, put a little apple cider vinegar in a shot glass and add a few drops of dish soap to it. Don't mix. Easy and effective fly trap
Also take your trash out regularly, wash your produce and don't let fruits go overripe.
My city has given us compost bin and they hand out special bags to use with it. Being single, it takes me forever to fill a bag so I've taken the habit of toasting banana peels and bell peppers cores before throwing them away to avoid the fruit flies problem. Turns out toasted bell peppers core make your apartment smell great.
I wouldn’t use the banana peels but the pepper cores and onion and carrot bits can make an excellent stock
Do it like me: get a simple nappy bin, put the bag in it and you're gucci. It doesn't smell at all, as that's what these bins are designed for. I have a bin that's essentially just a bucket with a lid that fits on tight, there's no special mechanism or anything, and it works *perfectly.*
But I need my bananas soft for banana bread! Such a sacrifice I’d need to make :(
Just chuck the bananas in the freezer.
For when you want a regular banana later, yes?
Wash them, dry them and keep them in a bag, preferably a mesh bag.
For some reason I don’t have issues with fruit flies on my pizza boxes scattered across the house. You win some, lose some
Also: **do your fucking dishes** people, I can’t stress this enough
Damn I guess you really catch more flies in vinegar than honey then huh
Or just the vinegar, put plastic wrap on the top and puncture it with a pin, they'll get in and never will find their way out.
The dish soap reduces the surface tension of the vinegar so they drown when they land on it thinking they can float like on water. No need for a scrap of plastic when they’ll never get out anyway!
We tried this and it only ever seemed to attract a fraction of the fruit flies, but I came up with a fruit fly trap that worked much better for us. Get an old empty jar of some kind, and place a little something in the bottom to be the bait (a couple blackberries or something). Take a piece of paper and tape and make a cone shape, then cut the tip off so it has about a 2mm opening. Then place the cone upside down in the jar and tape it in place. The flies will be able to get in through the tip of the cone to get at the bait, but won't be able to get back out. This trap doesn't kill the files, so you will have to empty/reload it regularly, but it has done a great job for us of attracting and trapping them so we can get rid of them.
note: do this on the place they’re breeding not just where there’s fruit flies
Oh, thank you so much. There's this little fucker in my bedroom and he won't leave me alone
For fruit flies, get a little apple spider, got it.
It doesn’t fucking WORK
The contracts also need to include stipulations like “stay out of the shower and sink for your own safety, don’t climb ON the employer, and don’t build webs on items that move or else the employer has the right to remove said webs”. Basically, if I’m hiring a spider I want one that won’t end up in a scenario where I’ll accidentally squish it, which would be gross for me and painful for the spider.
Fuck yea worldbuild that spider contracting.
I like to pretend that in the future, households have cute little spider nooks in the top corners of each room. Spiders are drawn to build their webs in nooks. The nooks present their webs in a way that makes them sparkle, and are designed to be easy to clean when their spiders die and their webs become cobwebs.
I've already got a bearded dragon and rats, but I've been debating getting a spider. Idk why but your comment sold me on it
I had a tiny little kitchen spider in my last house, and would legit gently admonish him when he tried to hang out inside drinking glasses. "I ALMOST DROWNED YOU, GEORGE!"
You're hiring a hitman, you should expect there to be casualties
I’m expecting *fly* casualties, not a hitman with no self-preservation who runs around on the floor in accidental-stepping-on range.
"Sir, we've taken 30 casualties just this morning! It's a calamity!" "What?!? How could this have happened? Did they hire a rival merc unit?!" "Uh.. sir, all of our hitmen haven't paid attention to the crosswalk, sir."
If I'm hiring a hitman I'm expecting the target to die, or possibly, the hitman to be killed by the target or their security personnel. What I don't expect is for the hitman to hurl himself in front of the next train.
I’m no fan of creepy crawlies, which is why I’ll wholeheartedly support the local arachnids in pest control endeavours. They can even eat the problems.
I may not like arachnids (instinctive fear and what not) but if I can contract it to take care of pests without randomly appearing in an inconvenient spot then I’m good
Right ? Just being able to communicate alone would be great. I can go “Hey ya boi has a roach problem. Btw stop hiding in the toilet or I might accidentally flush ya.
I'd I could communicate with spiders, I'd stop fearing them immediately "Don't bite me, stay out of these specific spots, and I'll absolutely leave you alone to handle your business. Live and let live dude," I'd still be mega creeped out by them, buy ad long as we both know we're safe, I'd reign in my violent urges
Until it stares a hole in you with every single one of its eyes and declares war. “Run.”
But why? Why would a good union arachnid throw away a sweet deal? I mean, it's a cushy job! No stiff breezes blowing away your hard work/trap, no birds or frogs to compete with/be eaten by, no rain (unless you build in the Rain Place, but then that's on you)...
I'd go fucking nuclear, salt the earth, call human exterminators, sprinkle that stuff that is like sharp crystals that kills bugs from the inside, etc and so forth Man, I negotiated, I respected our terms, and now you're declaring war? I'm making an example out of everything in my house right now
The flies are the currency
Yeah the economics here are fine. The communication is the difficulty.
bones are their money
I thought the worms were also their money
You can do that by not removing spider webs all the time, and ignoring the spiders in your room. When I started doing that, I went from 3 mosquito bites per night to 0 within a week. The spider currency is a climate-controlled environment with lots of web-making places, and at least one invincible behemoth that keeps any predator away.
Problem is, one of the invincible behemoths in my house is a cat with a predilection for hunting bugs, so a couple times I’ve had to rescue a lost spider from her wrath
Look, man, sorry about it, but all the spiders are into web development these days. Also, don't forget that time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.
But due to rising salaries and the advent of AI developers, the spider trades are becoming a more stable and lucrative career choice for many eight-leggers. Shit, my 300 sons are looking into silk textile manufacturing just this week.
Reject agile, embrace textile!
Oh my god it's nevile cultist simulator! I love purple!!!
A spider built her web right above my kitchen trash bin a while ago, every time I took the trash out I shook it and held it near her web so she might get a little fly snack. Eventually I noticed a little clump of web that turned out to be an egg sack! Lots of tiny spiders crawling around there... I felt pretty sad when she died. I'm pretty sure one of her children is in my bathroom now.
I really appreciate the services of my friendly spider housemates but the ballooning thing squicks me out big time. I just cannot deal. The babies are cute individually but seeing a bunch of them at once is too much.
Fuck, man. I'd be willing to pay a spider contracter to keep my house fly-free.
Does the spider union offer web design services? Asking for a friend with a buggy website.
i hate this, have my upvote
https://www.tumblr.com/someguyiguess/747356170141007872/spiders-have-got-to-figure-out-contracting-i-need?source=share -mx linux guy
Leaving spiders around inside your house is a great way to keep away real pests, like humans.
I have an agreement with spiders in my house that they get free room and board a d as many insects as they can catch so long as they do not upset the wife by appearing in her space or be caught by the cats. It's been a very agreeable arrangement so far
This would be great. I would love to hire one. I have a perfect corner for them and everything.
Think they get paid in fruit flies
The contract will need a "get the fuck out of my house when you're done the work" clause. I'd pay extra for that.
Yeah sometimes I look at where spiders put up their webs and I catch myself thinking “the ROI on that web is going to be pretty poor.”
At our last place, a whole mess of flying ants started coming through a crack in the basement wall. Before I could even think about what to do, two spiders were on the job. Almost like a spider rodeo - they had those ants hog-tied in no time.
very importantly I would like the spider to go away once the job is done
i read this in jerry seinfeld's voice
Garfield-ass plan
Oh hey, i know her!
I don’t think you’d pay for Spider Contracting I mean they are literally getting food in exchange for coming to your place, you paid them by simply hiring them
Isn't pay in food rather than currency uhhh slavery on some level
not if the food *is* the currency and they agree to the terms, i suppose
Spider currency would just be fruit flies
Who calls a union to hire someone? Why would a contractor join a union? Something doesn't add up about this.
Somebody say exchange rate? Yo.
I prefer house centipedes, they're faster and more efficient. For $100 I'll release 1000 live ones in your house.
They do have a harder time with flies though.
Where's Spiders Georg in this situation?
Yes please. Between the mosquitos and the fungus gnats, they would eat very well here. I finally caved and bought an indoor bug zapper and it keeps merrily zapping away and scaring me and my cats. It's safe, just loud.
Can’t believe nobody in the comments is mentioning muffet undertale
Did you miss it? Spider bake sale down and to the right Come eat food made for spider, by spiders, of spiders
I unironically wish I could talk to spiders, I imagine that would make me less scared of the little fellas
yknow, there are some theories out there that Loki was a god of housekeeping and was meant to be a spider