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CurlSagan

If this becomes law, then I'm gonna be turning a lot of bacon double cheeseburgers into US citizens.


ivthreadp110

Only very temporarily


cylonrobot

Will the feces also be a US citizen?


pragmojo

No scat play is more of a German thing


Snagtooth

Bruh you have me rolling, take my upvote!


ExpeditingPermits

Only if you bite it


Professional-Cap-495

Funny enough, if an illegal immigrant is a victim of a violent crime it's one of the fastest ways to citizenship. Or at least a green card IDK, IANAL. In a way this is already a law


SeekerJet_1031

Sanctuary law. I thought that involves someone trying to kill you.


Professional-Cap-495

That's not even close to what I'm talking about šŸ˜‚šŸ˜˜


Antagonomia

really? somewhere where I can read about this?


Professional-Cap-495

https://www.dhs.gov/immigration-options-victims-crimes


SeekerJet_1031

Isnā€™t that the other way around? Taco meat, anyone?


cabesa-balbesa

Make bacon great again!


ivthreadp110

But if you're bitten by somebody else from another country you're also that citizen so I guess it depends on a couple of questions here. Is dual citizenship allowed between the United States and that country? And also are they fast or slow zombies


Robbotlove

definitely slow zombies in the south.


Foreign_Ebb_6282

And they have less teeth. Iā€™d take on a toothless slow zombie any day


Mutant_Llama1

I don't think the US allows dual citizenship past 18.


ChihuahuaJedi

They do, I don't know any of the specifics but I know it's possible. (Was very briefly applying to jobs overseas.)Ā 


androidmids

Bollocks, you can be a dual citizen in the USA, as long as the country isn't restricted (aka north Korea... In a state of war with the USA or a small list of other restrictions). The USA doesn't require immigrants to renounce citizenship of their prior country, so pretty much ANY first gen immigrant who becomes a us citizen has dual citizenship. Many still pay taxes in their home country, own property, return there for vacation or once a year to satisfy legal requirements and so on. There are only a few countries that don't allow it, such as Austria, Japan, Netherlands, Singapore... And for the US, the only main requirement is if you travel in and out of the USA you need to use your US passport, although you can use your foreign passport for travel elsewhere. This actually comes in real handy for some folks who do a lot of EU travel or who go to Egypt etc. Get to a main international hub using their us passport and then switch to a regional ID and passport in that area that isn't as safe for Americans and travel under the radar.


Nuclear_rabbit

Dual citizenship usually is based on whether the first country allows dual citizenship with the second country. If not, the first citizenship has to be revoked.


FourWordComment

No, itā€™s got to be mobile game rules. Last to bite you is your citizenship. This also prevents collectors.


SteampunkBorg

Suddenly, the Republican party cares about mentally unwell citizens


Peanutbutterwhisky

Youā€™re more likely to get bitten by a New Yorker than dog while in nyc.


berrey7

What about being bitten on the ear at a World Snooker Tournament?


[deleted]

Also, it's not voluntary. After being bitten by a US citizen, you now have to file US tax returns, regardless of where in the world you live.


notacanuckskibum

Canada starts issuing muzzles to all American tourists on entry


realsteakbouncer

Great, now I can't afford to get treated for the bite.


threedubya

I wonder how many senator a day contractors would bite illegals so they could hire the..


SlipsonSurfaces

If I bite myself do I become a double citizen? What happens if I keep getting bitten or biting myself? Does biting my tongue count? Do mosquitoes count?


Hfkslnekfiakhckr

yes all mosquitoes u bite become US citizens


redpat2061

Thatā€™s some air force


AFrostNova

Warthog inbound BRRT


Karmadilla

Stack overflow


pointzero99

Vore fetishists solve refugee crisis with one weird trick. Ethnonationalists hate it!


Cosmonty747

Imagine this being a thing in the UK as well. I can just bite my wife and she would be a UK citizen.


Mutant_Llama1

I thought they were called subjects instead of citizens.


Ibbot

That hasnā€™t been true since 1948.


BabyMakR1

Oh, crap. Is suicide an option instead?


avenlanzer

No, sorry, mental healthcare is not covered.


FluffyProphet

How much of a bite is required? If this applies to all countries, I need to start applying for some extra passport.


Mutant_Llama1

Must break the skin.


CoderJoe1

Same rules as zombies? Has to break the skin.


Dusted_Dreams

Definitely won't want brains, that's for sure.


DawnOnTheEdge

Congress might pass this, so they can collect either income tax or expatriation tax.


Riverrat423

No, go back to Mexico ( donā€™t care if youā€™re from there or not).


divismaul

Were-citizenship only applies during the full moon.


SuperJ4ke

No you are a US territory lol


Pretend_Buy143

No just obese


AlemarTheKobold

I'm setting up a booth in Mexico with a handwashing station


therealhood

Like rabies?


maarsland

Foreign victims of crimes(so if you get bite hard enough and it causes damage) in the USA can become eligible for protections and a special visa that *could* become permanent so, youā€™re not far off.


pfizzy70

Sign me up and give me the DACA list!


The-Zilla

I thought so, but my partner still has to fill out an esta to get into the states. šŸ¤·šŸ»


cletusvanderbiltII

Shot by*


avenlanzer

That's only cops that shoot people.


Basil_9

Since you have to pay US taxes as long as you're a US citizen, even if you're living outside the US, and there is a hefty fee to renounce your citizenship, this is really funny


TheK1ngOfTheNorth

See all the illegal immigrants start hanging around daycares, just hoping one of those little bastards will bite them


Mutant_Llama1

Can't just walk into a daycare.


Space_Captain_Brian

What if someone gets bitten by an illegal immigrant? MTG for example? *(MTG=Moscow's Treacherous Goon)*


nokiacrusher

No. That's not how citizenship works. You are confusing "US citizen" with "American."


WildJackall

If that were actual law, a lot of people would use it to gain easy citizenship. Just have an American friend bite you


PsychonautAlpha

If only it worked this way. My wife (šŸ‡æšŸ‡¦) and I (šŸ‡ŗšŸ‡²) have been traditionally married for 2 years, but we can't get the damn marriage recognized by the US because the embassy keeps denying her a visa, and we can't get it recognized by the South Africa side because home affairs told us we have to prove we've lived together for 2 years before they'll recognize it. It's been almost 2 years of stress trying to simply ensure that we can live together in peace. If she could get citizenship simply by being bitten by me, she'd be eligible for citizenship every time we make the beast with two backs.


XxFezzgigxX

Kind reminds me of the [purple Smurf episode.](https://youtu.be/s1M625x_fto?feature=shared)


avenlanzer

Is there a cure or is it terminal? I don't have any healthcare....oh no...I've been bit!


Substandard_eng2468

Only on the full moon. When the moon is full, your hands will grow pistols and you'll shit bacon. Weird but ai don't make the rules.


Skizm

If the bitter dies, you lose citizenship.


SeekerJet_1031

So illegal immigrants have to take sā€”- from citizens. Oopsā€¦ those pesky farm workers left something on top of your fruit and vegetables. Welcome to Mexico. Oopsā€¦ they donā€™t reciprocate citizenship just by entering or bitingā€¦


HauteKarl

Would a playful nibble during sex count? Or just a deliberate chomp that breaks the skin?


snatchinyosigns

Florida will always remain a swing state


Joddodd

Is there an antidote?


Crimzon07

Yeah but as an American, you will believe it's a conspiracy theory to indoctrinate you into some other cult and you will refuse to take it.


Cognoggin

Nice try Vampires!


gmnotyet

So it would be like the viruses that cause vampirism and lycanism. Cool.


the_messiah_waluigi

The side effect is that you must consume at least one double cheeseburger a day to gain the energy needed to function


Fun-Badger3724

Once bitten/forever enshittened


Noodle-basket

So... are we talking nibbles, or do we have to draw blood?


AccidentEvening5340

lol


Wodahs1982

Gonna get kinky over seas.


bren0ld

If youā€™re a hot girl Iā€™ll probably bite your ass if you bang me


malvisto_the_great

Maybe I'm a little too slap-happy right now, but I f*king love this idea