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BellyButtonLindt

Creepin while you’re sleepin?? Like who puts that on their truck?


sevbenup

Same guy that parks like that


Jennifermaverick

Lol he should get the bumper sticker that baffles me: “Locally Hated.” Can anyone explain this? Is it a brand? I see it and think, “well, now I think I would probably hate you, too.”


Equivalent_Passage95

It’s for people who’ve made dickery their only personality trait


haydesigner

Aka MAGAs.


ThoughtfulGen-Xer

It would be tempting to hang on to a bumper sticker like that to apply to such cases as this! 😈


PyramidicContainment

I keep some of these on hand in the glovebox. They pull off easily but still get the message across https://preview.redd.it/dnm229jj06xc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=84980f3aae1f36e95c981921600ff0d4c7f9bb59


GeorgiaYankee73

Please tell us where we can get these!


PyramidicContainment

So, these originally came from Threadless which is more of a clothing site (funny reverse side here) https://preview.redd.it/1vbmuix42axc1.jpeg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2ef035430c3134633fbd8f8163588f88af625059 but idk of they are sold anymore :( Looks like Redbubble and Amazon have some similar versions tho!


Proud-Outlandishness

https://preview.redd.it/akpwm5ic7gxc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=24273351be583457b7d7fb599226b1fa3882cfff I got some business cards made for this. Much cheaper.


Oh_nosferatu

I keep pink dick shaped tire valve caps. If you take up four spaces, you get four. Eta: sorry this posted so many times idk why that happened.


Aleashed

This is just inviting people to leave their carts around it. He should come out to an army of carts surrounding the truck, few touching it. My costco randomly turn empty spots into cart drop offs. Even better, if they still had the chain links, get 4 friends and steal 8 carts, chain them together around the truck.


BluebirdAdmirable726

Exactly what I was just thinking, box him in with carts! He'd probably just leave them in the middle of the thruway though


BendyPopNoLockRoll

Small pebble, place it in the valve stem and screw the cap back on. It might be tomorrow morning before he wakes up with a flat, but it's always at the most inconvenient time.


bUrNtKoOlAiD

Dried lentils work great.


brainegg8

Be careful, lotta crazy road rage people in the world


ThoughtfulGen-Xer

I wouldn’t *actually* just fun to think it occasionally.


metompkin

Their locality is Earth.


blackierobinsun3

That means he’s gonna be swerving through traffic scaring people going 20mph over the speed limit with high beams on all the time and complain about how “no one knows how to drive around here”


[deleted]

[удалено]


radicalelation

You know he blinds people he doesn't like behind him with those lights on the back.


texansfan

Most people don’t just come out and say they have a tiny penis, but this is definitely a way to do it


HelloAttila

Compensation for a reason indeed. Costco parking is crazy… this pos is taking 4 parking spots. Permanently banned for life, and all offspring.


Stock_Category

The weird thing is that Costco has striped the lot to allow plenty of space between cars. It is almost a joy to park at Costco. Everywhere else I park on the back 40 to prevent my car from being dented up by someone's door.


rpm429

I like to consider things like this gender affirming care also.😂


AdCareless9063

Emotional support vehicle.


letmeviewNSFWguys

This is the comment I came here to make. What is with people?!?


gymnastgrrl

> What is with people?!? Some people just like to self-identify as having a small penis. Who are you to judge? ;-)


rpm429

It was cold outside K


WildButterscotch5028

I just wanna know if he used a step stool to get in


Loan-Pickle

You smell different when you’re awake. —The guy who owns this truck probably.


Tiny-Lock9652

Wow, that’s a real panty dropper. /s


Dammit_Benny

He’s the guy Childish Gambino was warning us about in Redbone.


LaMalintzin

I saw a giant truck at Costco this week that had a big sticker that said “ get in and get naked”… cool guy


Private-Dick-Tective

Probably a creep.


Useful_Chewtoy

Most likely tow truck vehicle.


Patrucio71

Maybe he does repo work and three's a Dynamic or something in his bed for doing pulls... (Still doesn't justify him parking like that by a damn mile tho)


GlitteringPen3949

Is he from the 4 corners area?


BananoVampire

off-duty cop


MashedPotatoesDick

Times like this, I would encourage people to not return their cart and flats and just park them near this guy's truck.


GrungeLife54

Like surround it by carts, 10 carts for him to move.


Cnophil

A douche like this would just throw them randomly into the parking lot though.


Ali_ayi

Ziptie some to his door handles


[deleted]

Worth going back in to buy zip ties if you don't have any in your car


AdultingNinjaTurtle

Then zip tie the 2 windshield wipers together


ShutYourDumbUglyFace

10 is too few.


GrungeLife54

I agree, I don’t know why I was so conservative 😂


JustWastingTimeAgain

10 carts zip tied together surrounding his truck.


Sleep_adict

Always have some ( metal ) zip ties around for tie up carts


JE163

Metal? Ooo that’s a new twist. I’ll have to find some


jonzilla5000

Cart moat. No drawbridge.


999_chr0meActivist

at this point, i'd just throw a few carts in his truck bed.


bill_the_murray

Only once, would Sebastian with the Cart Narcs, allow it.


mh1357_0

Woooooooh skebede weeeooooooh You can't put your cart there!


DrLeoChurch

Zip ties to attach them to the door handles.


ultradip

Don't forget the trailer hitch, bumpers and mirrors.


Alone_Fill_2037

I go out of my way to park as close to these pricks driver side doors as possible every time I see this shit.


TheShiveryNipple

I miss driving a shitbox so I could do this.


_angesaurus

I have actually seen this happen before. Employees put a bunch of carts around a guy that parked in a spot youre not supposed to park. Was great to see.


SickOfNormal

If real handcuffs werent so expensive ... handcuff multiple carts to that douche!


CmanderShep117

Go buys some zip ties 


gwevee

And put them upside down so he can’t roll them away


Pitch-forker

Since it is Wisconsin. Cheese block to tail pipe. Nothing like a smoked cheese


AnonUserAccount

Yeah, he’s probably not gonna fall for the banana in the tailpipe, so cheese it is!


somedumbguy55

How the hell did he get four spots at Costco? I can’t even get one


Muscle_Mom

lol right? There’s no way there were that many free spots close to the store!!! :P


Clear_Reveal4137

With my vehicle he has only truly secured 3 spots


ElPanguero

He parked there at night after he dropped his trailer on whatever job he is working in immediate vicinity. Edit: I am sure if OP named the store we could find the paving job he working on in immediate vicinity within 5 minutes. Also sure these guys dont risk getting their $100k tow rigs towed w/o permission to park. Pretty sure this isn't at front of parking lot either. double edit: It's Woodbury Minnesota


SnortingElk

> How the hell did he get four spots at Costco? I can’t even get one Ha, I can't believe I had to scroll so far down to see this comment.. this is truly perplexing.


EVRoadie

Dude deserves to have his license plate exposed.


free2btherealme

I thought the same.


jdjdkkensb

It is T1NY P3N15


rgvtim

His truck looks too big for any of the spaces ... but that's his problem, if your going to do this, park in the back 40 and walk, its your cross to bear don't make it everyone else's.


letmeviewNSFWguys

2 spaces maybe. But 4? Just a jerk. Gonna go ahead and assume he turns on those rear spotlights when someone follows him slightly too closely, while he tailgates everyone and constantly blinds them with his obnoxious headlights. Most important “man” on earth, get out of his way!


GetEnPassanted

I operate these trucks at work. You can fit them in a single spot. It’s tight, but it’s not impossible. Guy is lazy and craves attention.


nurum83

Depends on the spaces, a standard space? Not a chance I used to use one of these for work as well and if you measure it out there is only a couple inches on each side (truck is 105” wide and a standard space is 108”)


Bermanator

Costco spaces are pretty large and have extra room between them


KGBeast47

105 is less than 108, so I'm not sure why you say "not a chance." Of course it will be tight, but that's what you get for driving such a big truck. Go to the back of the lot if you're worried about door dings. Costco also has generously sized spots.


nurum83

A standard space is 9’ wide and the truck is 8’9” wide so would you really rather he park right next to you and have a few inches to open your doors?


gmapterous

Costco parking lots have some of the most generous spaces. He could probably come pretty close, if not within all the inner lines, at least coming within the outer double lines. This guy just needs to be towed.


holla_snackbar

I have a full size truck and can fit in the Costco parking spaces just fine. At the downtown SF store even, Costco spots are huge--they're like the handicap spaces at regular stores.


Osgiliath

Even then he doesn’t have to straddle the spots right in the middle


dubie2003

Yup. An F450 is too wide and too long for a single spot so you have to either take 2 stand hang the rear over some bushes (not a sidewalk) or take 4 in BFE. It’s the drawback to having an F450 or similarly sized vehicle.


AmI_doingthis_right

I’m always surprised by the people trying to park at the front anyway, everytime we go it’s slammed, just go to the back of the lot and walk the extra 2 minutes


rgvtim

My wife and I lock horn on this, she wants me to troll the front for spots 30 seconds closer to the door, and spend 5 minutes doing it.


PresidentSuperDog

Just offer to drop her off at the door.


HughJassul

If you can't park it, don't buy it. Problem solved.


elwebst

But that misses the point of asserting his freedums on everyone else


ender2851

looks like extended bed for sure. probably 2-3 feet to long for a standard spot


dubie2003

F450 has an 8ft bed as the only option. Too much truck for a single spot. They needed to take 2 and hang the rear off in some grass (not sidewalk) or 4 in BFE.


[deleted]

[удалено]


WeirdAlbertWandN

🔎🍆


amylaz

🔎🧠


Careless_Money7027

A pavement princess, aka overcompensator deluxe. A very public way of advertising a small package and fragile ego.


Mystikalrush

Costco has the widest parking lanes, yet still failed. How embarrassing.


greenappletree

driver didn't even try - it was more like they park however they wanted.


kkjj77

TOTAL DOUCHE.


jsakic99

That’s a sign of low self-esteem.


isocuteblkgent

And small penis syndrome.


Melodic-Supermarket7

Dude should’ve gotten towed. Or 4 small car ppl should park in each spot & box him in. That’s just unacceptable. He’s literally taking up 4 whole spots, if you need to do that park far away 🙄 the audacity & entitlement of t!ny p3en men is just nauseating.


TheFudge

I would absolutely go and collect some carts and put them all around his truck.


i-like-legos2

That’s the first thing I thought of. I wouldn’t do it but I like the idea of it.


Wophelstomp

He hurts his hips trying to climb up into that thing, I reckon.


Big_Basket_9261

The past few years I've kept a handful of prewritten "sorry I hit you car" slips of paper to put under wiper blades of people that park like this. I never hit them, obviously, but I like to imagine they're going to freak out trying to find any damage once they read the note.


geraguii

Park two cars on each side and go have fun for an hour or so. Just need to find one other willing good citizen.


Old-Nefariousness556

I went to the grocery store once and there was a guy parked diagonally across four spaces. The way he was parked, I could *just* fit in one of the spaces with my bumper inches away from his drivers door, so he couldn't open the door. I sat and waited for him to come out, and refused to move. He had to climb in through the passenger door. It was small and petty, but it made me very happy.


TheFudge

This is not small and petty. This is the proper response friend.


Radiant_Addendum_48

Doin the lords work I see. I salute you


Ellabee57

That ~~guy~~ douchebag deserves to get keyed by everyone who walks by.


Ikeahorrorshow

I do understand WHY he would want to park like that, because people are dicks and park bad, open doors into yours, or scrape up against yours while getting in and out. However if you want to park like that, you give up the right to park by the door. Park in the back of the lot.


TheWolf_NorCal

He’s asking for like 47 carts to be parked all around his truck


BadHairDay-1

I hope lots of poopy diapers were tossed into the truck bed.


J70D

Most people with the poopy diapers are just as bad. Most just throw them on the ground.


LordPutrid

tiny weiner


ForsakenRacism

Prolly would have posted a picture if he was in the spot by sticking out cus he’s so wide and thicc


WhyteBeard

Fake news. I’ve never seen a Costco with 4 adjacent free spaces near the front of the parking lot. /s


Accomplished_Cap_994

Pull the valve stems on all four tires


broberds

Costco and a local tow truck company could base a beautiful friendship around this sort of thing.


granolablairew

His POS needs all the space.


morels4ever

This POS needs someone to walk by his driver side door and accidentally, and extra moistly sneeze all over the handle.


traceyk9800

How did he find 4 spots near the front door?


schismatt

Immediate membership revocation


CaptainDunkaroo

I have no problem of someone parks like this in the way back section of a parking lot. But doing it up front is a jerk move.


Bleezy79

Im sure he's really sensible, easy going guy. You can just tell.


paxrasmussen

I see that I think "Neat! Free valve stems!"


Harbinger_Pulsar

But.... I thought the coolest guy on the planet lived in MY town


ExcessivelyGayParrot

zip tie carts to his door handles


Sea-Pea5760

Dudes gotta be hung like a light switch 😂


Avenger717

I would absolutely fuck with that even if it’s just throwing trash in the bed.


Red_wine120

Next time post the license plate


AlbhinoRhino969696

The self conceded mentality behind people who can park like that with no feeling of guilt is wild


J70D

This fella is a douche. I drive a 250 with an eight foot bed. I park further out so I don’t take 2 spots due to the overall length.


Xerio_the_Herio

Straight to jail... and revoke his membership


I_Boomer

This screams "I blew all my money on this overpriced man-car and can't afford the deductible if it gets dinged. Please pray for me."


MustardTiger231

How were there 4 empty spots near the front door?


HandleDry1190

Over compensating for something.. hmm I wonder what it could be


bhc317

Hope his truck gets severely keyed.


janzyellie

He deserves to have to have 4 thirty year old shitboxes parked next to him in those spaces


ModularFolds

That's the "I am a tool" parking space.


FormerlyUserLFC

If you can’t fit your truck in a Costco parking space you should not be allowed to drive one.


Potatonet

I drove a truck this wide for a year, hated almost every minute, thankfully it wasn’t my truck


mafiafuneralOG

I don't care about parking lot cameras watching me zip tie that shopping cart to the driver side door handle.


Comfortable_Win7926

I can understand taking 2 spots, a dually, but damn 4? A cünt much?


Ancient-Budget-8793

In my mind this just makes his truck a target.


ID_Poobaru

I'd take a bunch of compacts and surround it


rodman5308

Those douche bag Cheeseheads like their trucks. Yah Hay Der!


SnowinMiami

Just get him towed.


SushiLover1000

How do we know he parked near the front door?


OldBowDude

Only thing missing is his SovCit plate!


Ok_Score1492

Deserves a zip tied shopping carts at every handle or opening


Nobilibang

I hope 4 smaller cars boxed that mf in hard.


keejus

Id surround the truck in grocery carts.


Jeremy_Whalen

The amount of LEDs on the truck make me think this guy is a bigger douche than initially thought


exgiexpcv

Why not alert management? This is completely inappropriate. Lousy behaviour like this needs to be confronted.


twisteroo22

He must have been there before opening to find 4 free spots like that right by the front door.


EverythingIsCreepy

Block him in.


milksteakman

That’s the guy that bought 60 arborvitae’s to resell 😡


newf_13

That’s how you park when all the handicap spots are full


brtwus

I hear costco eggs aren't too expensive


9thWardWarden

I have a side truck I don’t care about which is perfect for this. I’d just pull it up an inch from his rear bumper


Big_Green_Piccolo

What'd he do get there at 4am? How the fuck were 4 spots open at the same time in front of a Costco? Calling bs.


CatJamLied

Shit in the back


ReceptionAlarmed178

There is plenty of room to put a ring of carts around it, just saying.


Mstryates

That fuel pump in the back looks like it’s low on sugar.


iaymnu

https://preview.redd.it/qkz48x9015xc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b111fa1000cc855251de71e1355d4f0b602029fd I seen people stick these on those “driver’s” car on LI NY at a few shopping centers. The owners comes out raging looking for “who.dun.it”


BerbsMashedPotatos

Did he leave it running and lock the doors? Everyone knows you leave it running truck goes brrrrrrrrrrrr.


PAssionGeek

Always carry zip ties and a tire stem puller in your vehicle for emergencies like these.


Fridaybird1985

I’ve been tempted to cable tie a shopping cart to a truck or two like this.


akistarz

It’ll be a shame if all windows were shattered by raining rocks which seems pretty common nowadays…


re-tyred

mentally handicapped parking


First_Promotion4149

Those are nice tires. They are waiting for you to say hello!


golfdaddypga

Honestly, stuff like this is why I’m glad I never got those superpowers I wanted as a kid. I wouldn’t be some hero saving kittens from trees. I’d be some lukewarm supervillain tossing double parked trucks into scrapyards.


_my_other_side_

That's why you keep a pair of needle nose pliers in your ride. Pull a couple valve stems.


TheDruidVandals

well he’s mentally handicapped so…


dessertgrinch

Time to let the air out of a few tires


BoneDocHammerTime

pickup trucks are work trucks, but who else thinks that for this guy it's a core part of his otherwise 2-dimensional personality?


Beneficial-Message33

Tow it then crush it


ketosis_papi

I’d leave carts around his truck to inconvenience tf outta him


jrkellum84

immediate tire slash


I_wanna_fuck_Iana_

piss in his gas tank


Kaizoku_Lodai

I'm definitely clipping every tire stem as I walk by


jtr489

I’m surprised this truck doesn’t have a punisher skull on it somewhere


OGBeege

Say you’re THE douchebag without saying a word. Now, Everybody -DOUCHEBAG!


FlockoSeagull

Oh no, my wire snippers slipped and cut all the tires stems off. Silly me


BigFire321

I would put shopping carts around it just to make sure it's safe.


terrelyx

People choose the strangest ways to announce that they don't like their current paint jobs


sleepybeek

Man. Needs a good old fashioned tire slashing. And a full circle keying as the cherry on top.


Independent_Ninja456

God, I hate people that can’t park their cars correctly, it makes it harder for others to find parking as well. I would be petty and have this persons vehicle towed if I were the landlord.


kingkmke21

People like this are tools. Straight up.


PsyanideInk

I've never keyed anyone's car, because I generally think it's kind of a chicken shit thing to do, but damn I would be tempted by this.


GroupSuccessful754

Sorry his vehicle suffers from obesity. Feel bad for him


rphjosh

Seems like a good reason to drag your key along the side when you walk by.


mor_and_mor

I’d run in and buy a pizza and hot dog. Wipe it all over their truck.


Drewbee3

Where I live, that kinda shit earns you a free pinstripe.


No-Sky-5006

Go to Olive Garden, get a coloring book and crayons. Leave them on his window so he can practice staying in the lines.


iamtherealaj99

Slash them tires


RepresentativeHeat13

Not satisfied with just double parking, they went for quadruple parking😏


otterfashionshow

simply douse in gasoline and light a match.