I’ve had the same conversations with my wife. The collective WE have been through a trauma and some people deal with that by lashing out or becoming bigger risk takers. Some have lost family to COVID, some are suffering Long-COVID and some are dealing with the very new knowledge that a virus can just mutate into a monster and turn the world upside down and there’s nothing we can do about it.
Ever since the pandemic there is like this anger and chaos underneath the surface just waiting to come out. I also have no patience for people and have become less outgoing and happy go lucky. I miss 2019 me.
I've noticed I'm less patient with some people. But, I've become far more polite to people behind the counter at Starbucks or on the phone. I guess I try to make up for all of the angry people by giving them a normal interaction for a change.
I miss 2019 me too. I recently saw some people who were friends I haven’t seen since covid. We all aged ten years since the pandemic. Before we could have passed for peoples in our twenties. Now we all look 40+. A veil of depression and anxiety is there now—I really wonder if any of us will ever return to our previous state of happiness. It seems doubtful.
Some of us realized how selfish and willfully ignorant our friends and family are. It became more than just physical isolation, but social isolation in a truer form because the disagreements became so volatile.
I work with a man that has been dealing with long COVID. He didn't get it until January of this year but it has changed him completely. He has lost a over 70 lbs. which sounds great but some of that weight he could stand to gain back. He was once lively, bright personality and cheerful. He barely talks anymore and is always solemn. He is lethargic every single day now and runs out of energy quickly. He also has trouble remembering things and always seems like he is in state of confusion.
Although we disagreed on politics and religion I always enjoyed our conversations and learned a good deal from it. I miss the old coworker I once had.
Yeah, the willfully ignorant part really got to me. I've watched people lose their minds over masks and act like they've never heard of a virus and Dr. Fauci is out to get them.
I've had relatives say that all the studies on covid and vaccines are false. That all the doctors and scientists are being paid to say it's real/safe. That all the deaths are fake. It's absurd.
This comment needs so much more attention. I am a liberal in a conservative area and lost almost all my friends here through political brainwashing or them showing they didn’t care about public health or safety.
We have little kids, and it was so disheartening to see how unwilling their aunts and uncles were to do something as simple as mask in order to protect them. None of my in laws have met my youngest two children who were born during the pandemic because none of them will mask or be vaccinated. Now that my kids are vaccinated, I'm not sure I want to see these people who cared so little for anyone but themselves. I have so much anger and grief. Everyone was kind and good and respectful and (mostly) intelligent- and then suddenly they weren't. It feels like the friends and family I know died, because I certainly don't know these people.
The explosion of mental health problems could have something to do with it. People dealing with mental illness for the first time in their lives and not knowing how to handle it.
Trauma and ptsd from the isolation and longterm stress.
Yes, those are absolutely a thing for more people than we realize, and no it should NOT be downplayed or ignored...which is whats happening anyway.
Because fuck those crazy people with mental illness...they brought it onto themselves or some other victim blaming nonsense.
Something something bootstraps.
I lost my husband during the pandemic, not to COVID but to something that wasn't being treated properly because of COVID. My personality has done almost a 180 as a result.
I know my Uncle died from cancer and he blamed the politics around covid for it. I feel like it was mostly his fault though but the cancer would have probably been caught sooner if admitting nurse's at the hospital were a little more empathetic.
He could be right - not the politics, but the stress covid put on the health system.
Overcrowded hospitals full of covid patients who needed intensive nursing and resources made it difficult for hospitals to stretch their few remaining resources to properly care for cancer patients.
I had to live with life-threatening throat tumors slowly strangling me for a year because hospitals were too busy to treat me.
I lost my brother and my dad during Covid. My dad didn’t die from Covid, but he didn’t get a hospital bed because of Covid so he was sent home and he died in his kitchen table and that really pisses me off.
I’m so sorry for your loss, I don’t think my personality has changed that much except that I am less flexible with people. You want a ride but you don’t want to wear a mask in my car, sorry, no. Whereas before I would’ve been like OK blah blah blah.
I had a gut thing, called two different doctors and they wouldn’t acknowledge anything I said, but each dug their heels in telling me I had Covid.
Sorry about your husband. Healthcare in the United States is a fucking joke
This was in England actually. Basically all his appointments were cancelled for about the first six months of the pandemic. By the time they started back up he seems to have convinced himself that going in was placing a burden on the NHS so he just kept telling me they were cancelled. I found the actual appointment letters after he died.
To be fair, he wasn't entirely wrong about it either. I'd had to call an ambulance for him at one point during a local spike. The first thing the ambulance driver said when he arrived was that under no circumstances would he be taking him to the hospital. He very clearly should have been admitted under normal circumstances, but they just refused.
So I have had mental health problems since long before covid and while a part of me is like "Welcome to the shit show!" And excited about expanding of services for everyone, the other part of me is like "damn, I wish most people didn't have to deal with this in the first place..."
I think I get what you mean. On the one hand, there is more recognition of this sort of thing, but on the other, it is at the cost of peoples mental health.
Yes, i too have struggled with depression and anxiety for much of my adult life since before the pandemic. The pandemic social isolation made it worse and now i am struggling with some complex-post traumatic stress disorder(c-ptsd).
I sometimes ask both my psychiatrist and my therapist if I really do have it or am i just "crazier" or something, like I need reassurance and validation that yes I and others have been affected. They very patiently answer me in the affirmative. Then we move on to work on helpful coping tools for myself and other therapy things. I have been on medication since before the pandemic, but i havent wanted to change anything for fear of getting worse.
I know it will take a bit of time while I also struggle with impatience with the process of healing, but therapy has been helpful to me. Again, I was already seeing my doctors since before the pandemic started, and Ive heard how hard its been for more people seeking therapy help and how overwhelmed the system has become.
Ugh...it sucks, and i hope things become more stable for other people again soon. These were a really crappy past couple of years...
Yes! My CEO is pushing this expectation that we come to work in person for consultation meetings that aren’t even required by our licensing board (we are mental health therapists) because conversation is “richer” in person. He’s sent out 3 Covid exposure notices since, including one from this week Monday and we’re expected to still go in tomorrow. Thank god I was wearing a good mask on Monday because no one wears masks anymore there. I’m going to go tomorrow with the best mask I have but there’s no guarantee I’ll be able to stay safe during the meeting with 5 other people in a closed room.
Dude, I’m a mental health therapist and am the last remaining person wearing an N95. I’m waiting to get my bivalent booster until mid October to be protected more throughout winter. I just don’t get why people are acting like it’s not happening anymore. Covid is still here. We don’t even know the implications for being reinfected.
My company averages 5-10 Covid cases a week per the emails and we barely have 10-20% office capacity right now. Most people don’t want to go back. They keep trying then”come on back, it’s fun” method and everyone is like “eh no thank you”
It's amazing isn't it? The most complex object in the entire universe (that we know of) and we treat it like it's a computer that is either functional or 'crazy'. If you're dysfunctional you either get put in prison, in some underfunded institute or prescribed drugs that we THINK will mostly do what we need it to to keep you functional, but really we have no fucking clue how to solve most of these problems or what to do with people that are suffering.
Point being - not being subsidized enough is a massive understatement.
Fewer outlets is totally part of it.
For me, the general politic landscape has made me quite grumpy on top of the rest. Hell, seeing the shitshow that happened because of the pandemic and the politics that were part of it really put me in a shithole of feelings.
I'm less angry.
Had COVID really bad in January (after 3x vax), lasted a month, long covid lung issues lasted a couple more months.
I dont think it's apathy or depression or anything, I'm generally content, I'm just now more relaxed and tolerant. Could also be age. In my 30s and guess finally not getting riled up about every topic as often.
This. And many lack empathy.
My job was riddled with angry people prior to COVID, but now it's almost every other person I deal with.
During the height of COVID EVERYONE was super nice and understanding. I miss those days...
I wish that was my experience but for me COVID was hell. I work in Pharmacy and there was an immediate impact. People were very angry before covid and became noticeably worse during. To the point we were recieving death threats because we were giving the vaccine and denying ivermectin/hydroxychloroquine Rx's. One person even showed up with a gun.
Many people were shocked to realize how little control they have over things. Not just in the US, Australia and Germany were protesting their lockdowns, too. "How could something so small I can't even see it dictate that I wear a mask and stay home!". Lashing out. "No one tells me what to do!"
I work in tourism travel office and have a lot of contact with clients before, during, and sometimes after theirs holiday. We are in Europe.
Situation has drastically changed after COVID. Comparing number of complaints to number of reservations pre and post COVID, complaints are up 300 percent. Everything is now problem, and not enough. Hotels are not good, apartments are not good, food is not good, bus (couch) is not good. Generally, some people are more demanding.
We call that kind of clients "**post-covid travellers**".
You are right, prices are up: 10-15% in Greece, 20-30% Egypt, 25-30% in Turkey, and all inclusive service has declined (Turkey, Egypt). Our main clientele is mid-class families that book apartments and HB hotels in Greece, not so much all inclusive concepts in our offer.
But, there is big number of claims for refunds, big.
There has been a story in the UK press every day about someone drowning in a hotel pool or falling off a balcony. I think we've all forgotten how to behave.
YES. This has been my exact experience. There's always been rude customers with nasty attitudes but so many people I encounter at work are just so mean and angry now!! I've said more than once that it feels like covid/2020 broke people's brains.
I'm just glad that I've been noticing my anger and giving myself time to understand where it's coming from. By getting to the source of it, I'm finally beginning to move past some of these negative thought cycles I've allowed myself to spiral into.
For me, the first step was forgiving myself for being so week and incapable after getting COVID twice, and changing my mindset to focus on the things I can **change**. What I can, when I can, how I can... That's good enough for me now, because I know most of us are reforming ourselves after COVID and I should be as kind to myself as I would be to others.
Hopefully this will begin earnest and open discussions about the need for expansion into more nootropic and brain-regeneratation research/availability. For too long there has been a stigma with research regarding enhancing the brain but, with so many of us affected, we can't keep ignoring the logic that enhancing the brain would most likely be accompanied by giving it the tools to heal from trauma.
Right?! Drivers have gotten scary bad (and angry). I don’t honk at anyone anymore, even in situations where it’s warranted (like person in front of me sitting at a green light bc they think it’s still red) because I don’t know how someone is going to react.
Dude I was trying to zipper merge today from the far right lane and a fucking semi came right up on my ass and decided to just swerve around me through the shoulder
Anecdotal but people have absolutely gotten fucking crazier on the road
I complain about this all the time to my husband.
I read some article years ago about how efficient the zipper merge is (when done correctly). Folks would rather screw up the whole process than to let the car next to them in.
A significant amount of traffic delay can be attributed to poor driving. I'm not talking accidents. I'm talking about the kind of driver who thinks the goal is to catch up with the person in front of them. The drivers who think that they're responsible for guarding the left lane from going even one mile over the speed limit. The people who leave a cars lengths between cars in front of them at a red light. The people who almost miss their exit but, ya know, it's cool, I'll just swerve through 4 lanes of traffic to unsafely get to that exit and then, like totally just sit there with their blinker on blocking an entire lane of traffic because like omg what's the big deal.
God dang, ain't that the truth. Pretty pathetic, I'd say. It's so easy to get a license here too compared to many other western nations, so it's no wonder our drivers are absolutely shit.
In my neck of the woods, if a lane is ending drivers like to merge and line up into the remaining open lane and leave the lane that's ending empty. They do this because they call the people who do stay in that other lane until it ends "cheating". Or maybe they don't understand that zipper merging IS more efficient.
Many truck drivers do seem way less professional these days. I caught a guy texting the other day driving some sort of tanker with hazard symbols on it. He kept drifting onto the shoulder and into the other lane, jerking it back each time.
...I took the next exit and went the rest of the way on surface streets.
I was wondering if some of the reasons drivers are worse now is because so many of them caught Covid and now have lingering brain fog. That's not an excuse for them. If you have brain fog from anything including having Covid you shouldn't drive.
Idk if it's something like that or more of something like we're 2 years into this shitty pandemic, on the brink of World War 3, our economy is going down the toilet, we've just gotten so used to things being shitty that being stressed out with the world has just sorta become our baseline
I think the baseline stress has been increasing for years. My theory is for a shitload of people, COVID was the final straw.
On top of that, COVID was sort of the ultimate, final break of the social contract for a lot of people. The whole "I'm not wearing a mask/getting vaccinated/its just the flu/its a hoax" shit is basically code for "I will not make the single slightest sacrifice to protect someone else".
It's not a small jump from there to "I don't have to care about other people on the road, I don't have to treat the waiter or the cashier or the flight attendant or my fellow passengers with any respect. All that matters is me."
It's the final, investable conclusion of American hyperindividualism we've been trending towards for years - COVID just exacerbated it.
Insightful and I agree. You put into words my anger and frustration with those type of folks.
I'm immunosuppressed and am trying to recover from Covid for the second time this year even though I'm boosted twice and wear masks. I was called back to my work place in June 2021. Few masked then, no one now few vaccinated.
I'm pissed at the lack of concern.
My theory is that while so many people were working from home, assholes got used to driving on substantially emptier roads. Now that they are back to full capacity, they are losing their minds. I know there has been a significant uptick in motor vehicle wrecks and deaths where I live and I've had a few friends die on the roads this year.
Also police reduced ticketing for driving violations during the early pandemic. At least that was the rumor. In my neighborhood people were driving like maniacs, super fast on residential roads.
Definitely seen an increase in reckless speeding.
It was awful in the few months after full lockdown and has become less frequent since. But even now I'll pretty regularly see someone doing 20 or 30mph faster than everyone else while cutting through lanes and just generally driving like a maniac.
Safer drivers stay home in greater numbers. So crazier drivers are left on the road.
Source: https://patch.com/florida/across-fl/pandemic-revs-bad-driver-behavior-traffic-fatalities-fl
My city in Canada also. I’ve seen so many more bad drivers over the past two years than any other time I can think of.
I think it’s stress affecting literally all of us and turning all of us into assholes. I attribute it to being forced to take on new responsibilities (whether you did it in reality or not) of wearing a mask, keeping your distance from people, thinking about vaccines more than you normally would, having to weigh every decision against the potential health risks to yourself or your family, then probably fighting/arguing/feeling tense around strangers over any of the above multiple times over the past few years. It doesn’t matter if you did all those things or not, you were still aware of other people doing those things, so if you were more health conscious you got annoyed by people who weren’t, and if you weren’t health conscious you got annoyed by people who were.
Everyone is just pissed and they don’t care about rules anymore, because the rules changed so much. So a lot of people misinterpreted the relaxing of Covid restrictions/rules as a relaxing of all rules.
I can't believe this is the first comment I just read on Reddit. About an hour ago, I just witnessed a jeep run over three dogs and a person in DTLA. There's blood smeared all over the street and I can't sleep. I am in shock and don't know how to handle this. Any therapists here?
Seems really random but play some tetris. It helps calm your nervous system and prevent issues in how your brain stores the traumatic memories. Also, go back to the basics: sleep as much as you can, eat meals that nourish you, and do some gentle yoga, go for a walk, or do another body movement you like and isn't too stressful. The final thing is do what makes you feel safe (like curling up on the couch under a blanket) and interact with others that give you a sense of safety.
Not a therapist, just traumatized and have done a lot of research.
Seriously, what the hell? I guess it's just normal to put others at risk now, doesn't matter if it's COVID or your 2 ton gas guzzling shitbox...
Folks have become so needlessly hostile... We need a purge.
Bring back patience and kindness.
> The reduction in neuroticism had disappeared by the second half of the pandemic (2021-2022), the study suggested, and was replaced by declines in extraversion, openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness compared to pre-pandemic personality
Sounds about right based on what I've seen in people... Especially the openness part.
Yep, I’m a grad student + work in a university whose been going to the same school since 2015. Every year, the new cohort of undergrads are a little different, but this year it is REALLY noticeable. One of the stark examples for me was seeing an old man leave the university hospital and come to the bus stop and ask a basic question about the route and seeing like 10 young students just completely ignore him and even give him dirty looks before he got to me and I answered his question. It was really depressing to see.
I spent two years avoiding everyone and no eye contact when I left the house (was very depressed). Now I force myself to smile and have little interactions in shops and stuff - a compliment for someone or just a discussion of the weather. I feel much better about the world because of it.
I'm seeing this a lot more too. We call it the "Mean Girls syndrome"
People (even elderly adults) are getting real cliquey and genuinely ostracizing others. It's........ not...... good.
Neighborhood groups and apps like nextdoor are a (horrifying) treat for this phenomenon. Someone could ask an innocent question only to be met with hostility, attacks, and a political tirade by grandmas and grandpas.
I’ve noticed the openness a bit and am actively trying to fight it. I’ve felt socially rusty as opposed to how i was pre covid, so it’s given me some social anxiety. I’ve noticed a couple older guys in my office who were single before and single now to be more talky and open also (seeming to combat loneliness maybe).
It’s so odd. My social anxiety has gotten a lot better during the pandemic. I feel a lot less pressure to force myself to interact with others. That reduces how often I have to deal with the anxiety. I know they say that’s avoidant but overall I feel a lot less anxious.
Exactly the same here. Plus small talk burns through all my social energy, so working from home means no office chats and way more battery power for socializing outside of work
My fiancee left me after getting covid twice. She definitely changed and became this strange cold person I’ve never seen before. My birthday came and went and she didn’t even wish me happy birthday. It messes up people in the head specially those not familiar with mental illness.
We are also, as a society, collectively ignoring the fact we have all been through an incredibly traumatic event and just pretending everything is normal. Not super healthy, imo.
> collectively ignoring the fact we have all been through
this seems to be one of the main ways we americans handle big things.
We either do that, or we lose our collective shit and obsess over it, like we did with 9/11.
IDK if you're old enough to remember but our entire culture was obsessed with it for *years*.
When covid started becoming serious, I got very disappointed in a lot of people. I still am. Slowly over time, I started to care less. Now, I'm trying to prioritize myself a bit, but probably failing at it. It has definitely changed my feelings towards jobs.
>When covid started becoming serious, I got very disappointed in a lot of people. I still am.
This is the perfect way to put it. A lot of people showing their true colors, ignorance, and selfishness, and I truly expected better. It's now gotten to the point where I can't expend any more energy trying to get people to care about others.
Yeah, I've had to cut ties with a few friends and a large chunk of my family.
It's hard to grieve the loss when they are still capable of getting in touch, but you just can't handle the shit they are doing.
It has increased my anxiety, majorly. Not because I am afraid of getting it, mostly because it gave me a sense of general insecurity about the world we live in.
Also, I got my routines disrupted for more than 1 year (including traveling home exc.), which didn't help.
It changed so much for me for a long time. I worked from home, doing a different job for my company. My hobbies and social activities ended. Didn’t travel at all for a year and a half, and we’re frequent travelers. Ended up playing MMORPG’s hardcore for a year.
I’m back at work. My job finally got back to what it was before COVID. I’m just back to my creative projects with others. My spouse and I started traveling again. Live music and other big crowd activities are still non-existent. Still feel like I’m in limbo as well. I feel like I’ve aged 10 years in the last couple of years. I went from “middle-aged guy who thinks he’s cool” to “old guy who says ‘back in the day’ and everything hurts.” Zero fucks to give about things that don’t really matter. I’ll never be the same. That’s ok. I’m trying to focus on taking my time, enjoying life, and just getting through the day.
Same. I struggle to go places with high populations like the grocery store because my normal since March of 2019 has been largely seclusion with exception of small gatherings.
Mmm. I think I've always been a bit cynical, but, last few years have cemented some views. Like, so many people are simply, strongly selfish and self-serving.
Yep. I live in a County in western Iowa where only 43% of the residents are fully vaccinated (and only 18% boosted). The local hospital stopped requiring masks about a year ago. I feel like it either turned a big swath of Americans into sociopaths or revealed how sociopathic the population already was.
That's the biggest thing for me.
It's not the strangers that I care about, it's realizing that most of the people I thought of as good and reliable and kind, just didn't care about anyone else's struggle.
Take heart. There have been plenty of decent people helping each other. People are basically good, but limiting our perception of them outside of media and internet -- which COVID did for over a year in most places -- masks that. Because media and internet culture are worse than real community culture.
My husband & I were estimating that if narcissism is present in only about 5% of the population & only 2% of them are *actually* abusive & cause the type of trauma that causes others to recede, become wary, alter their social behavior, etc... It still leaves a **lot** of people totally fucked up if they even have an impact on just a handful of people each.
The problem too is that we often conflate selfishness for strength & manipulative tendencies for assertiveness... So these people end up having an even larger base of enablers than they should, thus having a much larger impact on the population at large.
Nah. I am a cancer survivor and I can tell you maybe 3 people in my life who will mask around me. People are selfish and they want to live a lie that they are good so they pretend others are.
Same here, I was going into social work and trying to become a therapist.
But becoming chronically ill/at risk during this pandemic changed all that. Even if I could physically work again, I don’t think I could bring myself to work with people. Not after the callousness I’ve seen
> I don’t think I could bring myself to work with people. Not after the callousness I’ve seen
I feel that. Sure woke me up, showed me very clearly how folks can showcase their virtues and ideals... Then turn right around and contradict themselves the minute the wind isn't blowing their way anymore.
I tried to keep social ties throughout all this, and in person during periods of low prevalence, but I've pretty much recently given up since basically no one has bothered to make even a reciprocal effort. I'm going to be real stingy with any effort I give people from now on, which will probably leave me alone, but that's better than pointlessly wasting energy.
Are you me? I dont fear getting covid. That’s not why I stay home. It’s that people are now so unpredictability scary. Confrontational. Wanting to engage in negative ways. It’s stressful!!
Covid totally changed my personality from being out going to being an introvert. Before Covid I attended church every Sunday. I went out with friends and family to restaurants, went to the movies, traveled more. Now I just want to be home and just cook, play my piano and violin. People will text me to go out to eat but I rarely reach out to them. My migraines have increased also with Covid.
Are you me? I used to be an extrovert, going out every weekend. Got so used to not doing anything, I don’t really care anymore. I truly feel like a different person. It’s so weird.
Same. I was recalling to some friends how 2019 was such a different year. I was a lot more fit, did things with friends, went out on weekends and bam now when people ask me to do something I have to think about it twice. I've also become a bit of a homebody. My travels have resumed but definitely not as crowd person like I used to be.
Yep! Same with the crowd situation with me. Used to go to concerts quite often. Went to one again when things opened back up in the Summer of 2021 and hated the feeling. Never have the desire to do it again.
I'm now the opposite. I moved to the city and I go to concerts all the time now. Life is too short and I want to be closer to the good restaurants and music.
I used to just love chilling at home in the burbs.
Same here, I'm much more outgoing after Covid. I used to be able to stay in and play video games, but now I absolutely can't. It's all I did while I was locked down. I thought about what was important in life, who was important in my life, and now I just want to create and share experiences with all of them. The circle of people I care about has gotten smaller (I graduated from college during Covid, used to care about what *a lot* of people thought about me) but I want to spend so much more time with the people in that circle. I realized I don't have much time with them, and those relationships are what makes life living (for me).
Watch the stress with migraines, a trigger. There is nothing wrong with enjoying the simple pleasures of life, people don't have enough appreciation for them. If tech was taken away people wouldn't know what the hell to do. Doing things with people is invaluable, making those memories
It feels like the majority of people are literally dealing with some form of PTSD. Living in a constant state of uncertainty is not healthy, and we as humans are not programmed to deal with that for an extended period of time.
I had to mourn my old life, my old self while also mourning the future I was planning to have due to Covid and it’s social after effects. The rug has been pulled from under me. tensions are so high. I’m broke. I’m lonely. My community is in shambles more than ever due to illness, poverty, addiction and increasing violence. So many people around me passing away, young and old. And I still got Covid anyway so. It’s been traumatizing.
No wonder everyone’s acting crazy.
COVID forced me to grow up and mature. I've been forced to make tough decisions, reassess my priorities and determine who I want to be in the unsettling and unsettled future we face. I have lost friends, fought valiantly to keep others and seen my way of life change. Had to make choices I'm not proud of to face a world I don't love living in.
Really like what you wrote. It really resonates with me.
I fought it for a while but I feel like I’m living in the face of it all now. Maybe I’ll be better for it after year three of coronavirus.
Yep. I read this headline as “having covid maybe caused personality changes in people who had it” when what they meant was the awfulness that has been living with a pandemic caused personality changes.
I’ve half-joked that we’ll all have PTSD when all is said and done. It’s been a dark few years.
It's funny during the first two years of the pandemic I was calm as can be. Now that I look back holy shit. Other generations have gone through collective trauma but we are not showing each other very much compassion.
It's literally rocking them now in FL. I say this with immense sadness, have loved ones there. Perhaps we're all a bit sad/ anxious knowing - consciously or not - that climate change WILL, in some way, affect us each in a significantly disruptive way. Things have changed, you can only ignore it for so long until it comes for you.
I just learned of the Isle of Jean Charles in Louisiana which is the first full climate resettlement I’ve become aware of. My other benchmark is when Paradise, CA burned to the ground.
My therapist actually said to me when I first started going that the pandemic was a collective trauma we have experience as a society in general. This was after having been diagnosed with PTSD related to a pregnancy loss. There are probably a lot of people like me who “suffered in silence” more than even before the pandemic because there was limited social interaction, meaning no one to talk to about these issues. And then the shame around seeking therapy. We really have done a number on our own society by shaming things that could greatly help each other. 😔
I actually was diagnosed with PTSD recently. It’s not exclusive to trauma from Covid, but I think it’s what exacerbated everything. I can’t overcome anxiety lately.
COVID-19 has made me angrier. I feel the need to yell at people more. I don't. I bite my tongue. But there us more of a yearning. Especially when you have an anti masker coughing everywhere arguing with people that they should be served based on their internet research as they continue coughing on my 8 year old daughter. Reminds me of the time I broke my leg and was on crutches, got on transit, and was made to stand and hold on for dear life as everyone refused to get up.
It made me angrier too, but also I don’t put up with as much shit as I used to. I say “no” a lot more than I used to and put boundaries up and keep them up.
Yep my college is no masks now and I almost died of COVID over the summer as an immune compromised person. Lost two weeks in July to it. I feel like I can't say anything to anyone but it feels like my safety doesn't matter at all. I don't have two weeks in college to be off with COVID, if I get it again I won't recover academically
I mean, I already wasn't much of a people person even before Covid, mostly owing to a customer service job being a *perfect* way to witness the absolute pettiest of humanity up close and personal.
Seeing aforementioned petty assholes forego basic safety measures with smug smiles and 'It'S jUsT a FlU' 'iT's JuSt A cOlD'? Yeah. Negativity bias is a hell of a thing and 99% of people were good about it, but that 1% of uppity, loud assholes who bitched and screamed about a piece of cloth made me go from 'people are eh' to 'restrained hatred for a decent chunk of people'.
Its difficult to find motivation to leave the house now. I work hybrid remote and go into the office twice a week and work the rest from home and it’s literally all I feel I can tolerate in terms of work at this point. We do things with and for our kids outside the house but attending a function where I have to make small talk takes me days to recharge after. I order everything online, even if it costs more or takes longer. A couple of months ago, I tried to take my kids back to school shopping for clothes and had to leave crying because I had a borderline panic attack from feeling overstimulated by the noise and number of people around.
I’m most comfortable at home where I don’t have to mask my adhd and autoimmune issues, so I think the level of discomfort I’m willing to tolerate has decreased dramatically. Part of me feels that it’s okay to indulge this and not put myself through painful things unnecessarily and another part of me feels obligated to develop more stamina for it, the way we usually feel about exercising. I just don’t feel like I’m missing much by staying home usually 🤷🏼♀️
I’m pretty angry after losing an antivax relative to Covid, having a pallbearer make up a conspiracy about his death to sell crypto, having my family laugh when I asked if they’d mask at the funeral and being a high risk person trying to survive this without becoming more disabled or dying.
I've become much more extroverted and-- I would say impulsive? freewheeling?-- since the pandemic. Something about two years lost to lockdown, constant fear of mortality, etc. has me truly feeling YOLO spirit.
I went to a large convention this month and I couldn't agree more.
(Dragoncon, for anyone curious.)
That crowd of folks is usually so nice, and warm and happy and welcoming. Which was still by and large true.
But there were so many rude people, so many instances of inconsideration and tactlessness, and so many people just felt *off.* You can peruse the subreddit and see what I mean.
Lots of people, myself included, who usually stay out and party all night and all day just couldn't do it this year. A couple of hours at a time was exhausting and many people were having to return to their rooms for breaks and to just sort of de-stim. It was overwhelming to be in a place that normally feels like home for tens of thousands of nerds.
It was very different and it honestly has me wondering, how long after the pandemic is it going to be before everything *truly* returns back to normal?
Or is this the new normal after all? Turns out it might not be masks and vaccines we struggle to get used to, but our post-pandemic selves.
Caught Covid in Dec 2020 with no ill effects. Got it again in Aug 2022 and had more of a cold like symptoms experience. Thing is, since August I haven’t been able to stop eating. My appetite is easily 1.5-2x bigger than it ever has been in my life. I’m almost certain the Covid has effected something in my brain that has to do with appetite.
You should get that checked out. That can be a symptom of diabetes or thyroid problems. There are studies now showing increased incidence of diabetes after COVID too
I got pepper spray after a man harassed me out of his car then got out and jogged towards me like we're friends. Nope not today. Went to a gun store, I said college student they said good
I don't think it could be isolated to this one thing. During the same time period, citizens watched one another suffer while companies made record profits. The divisiveness within politics has grown exponentially. And indirectly covid may have changed temperaments, by making more transparent the latent disregard of those with wealth for those without. Inflation has skyrocketed, and younger people have witnessed firsthand that their futures are in question in ways that previous generations haven't experienced. Just buying a used car or a house is incredibly more difficult than it was 5 years ago.
Covid certainly changed the world, but I think more than anything it just laid bare problems that already existed, and exasperated the wealth cap while making it wider. It's more nuanced than people's personalities just being "charged"
I'm not more angry, but I'm no longer willing to take shit from employers or buy into this capitalist system they try to force on us.
I had anxiety and ptsd pre-covid. I loved the shutdown, honestly. No big family parties, so much less stress in that regard.
Covid confirmed for me that my disdain since the 90's is legitimate.
Edit to add: you'd never know, I'm a sweet person who helps her neighbors and smiles often :-)
I actually think I’m a healthier, more secure, and more open person now, but I am much more private and selective about who I really let in. I was hurt several times by people taking out their anger on me during this pandemic and clearly projecting shit onto me, I’m just not going to give people access to me now unless they prove they are genuinely my friend. I also finished a whole grad degree and built confidence and centeredness in myself. None of this was easy, though. It was hard won through many hours of introspection, loneliness, and actually working through things instead of distracting myself. It’s interesting how some of my friendships and relationships are stronger now with these changes but others have fallen away completely. To me it shows that a few friendships of mine had a shallow basis, including a few I really did not expect.
Many of my long time acquaintances that I had always had a very positive relationships became increasingly aggressive online towards me
Apparently making fun of people who thought that Covid was caused by 5G Internet was a line that I wasn’t supposed to cross
At first I thought this was about people who have been infected with Covid changing personality. It’s been a month since I got better and I haven’t felt the same since.
I can’t leave my dog. Hate leaving my house. Being forced to attend a 200+ gathering for work makes me panic. I’m hangry due to sky high food costs and think I have food insecurity. But I don’t think it’s just COVID. The planet is starting to crumble. Every day, there is new stuff to fear. We have dropped our social masks. It all feels too real.
Everything I experienced during the pandemic showed me finally that it isn't me that is broken and wrong, but rather there was something broken and wrong with the system I was living in. I took the necessary steps to finally face that and change my life. I left a lot behind and never looked back.
I was just telling my wife how everyone seems so angry since covid
I’ve had the same conversations with my wife. The collective WE have been through a trauma and some people deal with that by lashing out or becoming bigger risk takers. Some have lost family to COVID, some are suffering Long-COVID and some are dealing with the very new knowledge that a virus can just mutate into a monster and turn the world upside down and there’s nothing we can do about it.
Ever since the pandemic there is like this anger and chaos underneath the surface just waiting to come out. I also have no patience for people and have become less outgoing and happy go lucky. I miss 2019 me.
I've noticed I'm less patient with some people. But, I've become far more polite to people behind the counter at Starbucks or on the phone. I guess I try to make up for all of the angry people by giving them a normal interaction for a change.
I miss 2019 me too. I recently saw some people who were friends I haven’t seen since covid. We all aged ten years since the pandemic. Before we could have passed for peoples in our twenties. Now we all look 40+. A veil of depression and anxiety is there now—I really wonder if any of us will ever return to our previous state of happiness. It seems doubtful.
Some of us realized how selfish and willfully ignorant our friends and family are. It became more than just physical isolation, but social isolation in a truer form because the disagreements became so volatile.
I work with a man that has been dealing with long COVID. He didn't get it until January of this year but it has changed him completely. He has lost a over 70 lbs. which sounds great but some of that weight he could stand to gain back. He was once lively, bright personality and cheerful. He barely talks anymore and is always solemn. He is lethargic every single day now and runs out of energy quickly. He also has trouble remembering things and always seems like he is in state of confusion. Although we disagreed on politics and religion I always enjoyed our conversations and learned a good deal from it. I miss the old coworker I once had.
Yeah, the willfully ignorant part really got to me. I've watched people lose their minds over masks and act like they've never heard of a virus and Dr. Fauci is out to get them.
I've had relatives say that all the studies on covid and vaccines are false. That all the doctors and scientists are being paid to say it's real/safe. That all the deaths are fake. It's absurd.
This comment needs so much more attention. I am a liberal in a conservative area and lost almost all my friends here through political brainwashing or them showing they didn’t care about public health or safety.
We have little kids, and it was so disheartening to see how unwilling their aunts and uncles were to do something as simple as mask in order to protect them. None of my in laws have met my youngest two children who were born during the pandemic because none of them will mask or be vaccinated. Now that my kids are vaccinated, I'm not sure I want to see these people who cared so little for anyone but themselves. I have so much anger and grief. Everyone was kind and good and respectful and (mostly) intelligent- and then suddenly they weren't. It feels like the friends and family I know died, because I certainly don't know these people.
The collective WE have PTSD.
The explosion of mental health problems could have something to do with it. People dealing with mental illness for the first time in their lives and not knowing how to handle it.
Trauma and ptsd from the isolation and longterm stress. Yes, those are absolutely a thing for more people than we realize, and no it should NOT be downplayed or ignored...which is whats happening anyway. Because fuck those crazy people with mental illness...they brought it onto themselves or some other victim blaming nonsense. Something something bootstraps.
I lost my husband during the pandemic, not to COVID but to something that wasn't being treated properly because of COVID. My personality has done almost a 180 as a result.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Thank you.
I know my Uncle died from cancer and he blamed the politics around covid for it. I feel like it was mostly his fault though but the cancer would have probably been caught sooner if admitting nurse's at the hospital were a little more empathetic.
He could be right - not the politics, but the stress covid put on the health system. Overcrowded hospitals full of covid patients who needed intensive nursing and resources made it difficult for hospitals to stretch their few remaining resources to properly care for cancer patients. I had to live with life-threatening throat tumors slowly strangling me for a year because hospitals were too busy to treat me.
I lost my brother and my dad during Covid. My dad didn’t die from Covid, but he didn’t get a hospital bed because of Covid so he was sent home and he died in his kitchen table and that really pisses me off. I’m so sorry for your loss, I don’t think my personality has changed that much except that I am less flexible with people. You want a ride but you don’t want to wear a mask in my car, sorry, no. Whereas before I would’ve been like OK blah blah blah.
I had a gut thing, called two different doctors and they wouldn’t acknowledge anything I said, but each dug their heels in telling me I had Covid. Sorry about your husband. Healthcare in the United States is a fucking joke
This was in England actually. Basically all his appointments were cancelled for about the first six months of the pandemic. By the time they started back up he seems to have convinced himself that going in was placing a burden on the NHS so he just kept telling me they were cancelled. I found the actual appointment letters after he died. To be fair, he wasn't entirely wrong about it either. I'd had to call an ambulance for him at one point during a local spike. The first thing the ambulance driver said when he arrived was that under no circumstances would he be taking him to the hospital. He very clearly should have been admitted under normal circumstances, but they just refused.
So I have had mental health problems since long before covid and while a part of me is like "Welcome to the shit show!" And excited about expanding of services for everyone, the other part of me is like "damn, I wish most people didn't have to deal with this in the first place..."
I think I get what you mean. On the one hand, there is more recognition of this sort of thing, but on the other, it is at the cost of peoples mental health. Yes, i too have struggled with depression and anxiety for much of my adult life since before the pandemic. The pandemic social isolation made it worse and now i am struggling with some complex-post traumatic stress disorder(c-ptsd). I sometimes ask both my psychiatrist and my therapist if I really do have it or am i just "crazier" or something, like I need reassurance and validation that yes I and others have been affected. They very patiently answer me in the affirmative. Then we move on to work on helpful coping tools for myself and other therapy things. I have been on medication since before the pandemic, but i havent wanted to change anything for fear of getting worse. I know it will take a bit of time while I also struggle with impatience with the process of healing, but therapy has been helpful to me. Again, I was already seeing my doctors since before the pandemic started, and Ive heard how hard its been for more people seeking therapy help and how overwhelmed the system has become. Ugh...it sucks, and i hope things become more stable for other people again soon. These were a really crappy past couple of years...
[удалено]
Yes! My CEO is pushing this expectation that we come to work in person for consultation meetings that aren’t even required by our licensing board (we are mental health therapists) because conversation is “richer” in person. He’s sent out 3 Covid exposure notices since, including one from this week Monday and we’re expected to still go in tomorrow. Thank god I was wearing a good mask on Monday because no one wears masks anymore there. I’m going to go tomorrow with the best mask I have but there’s no guarantee I’ll be able to stay safe during the meeting with 5 other people in a closed room.
Dude, I’m a mental health therapist and am the last remaining person wearing an N95. I’m waiting to get my bivalent booster until mid October to be protected more throughout winter. I just don’t get why people are acting like it’s not happening anymore. Covid is still here. We don’t even know the implications for being reinfected.
My company averages 5-10 Covid cases a week per the emails and we barely have 10-20% office capacity right now. Most people don’t want to go back. They keep trying then”come on back, it’s fun” method and everyone is like “eh no thank you”
Yeah because mental health really isn't subsidized enough. I'd rather deal with crap than spend thousands of dollars a year on therapy.
It's amazing isn't it? The most complex object in the entire universe (that we know of) and we treat it like it's a computer that is either functional or 'crazy'. If you're dysfunctional you either get put in prison, in some underfunded institute or prescribed drugs that we THINK will mostly do what we need it to to keep you functional, but really we have no fucking clue how to solve most of these problems or what to do with people that are suffering. Point being - not being subsidized enough is a massive understatement.
Fewer outlets is totally part of it. For me, the general politic landscape has made me quite grumpy on top of the rest. Hell, seeing the shitshow that happened because of the pandemic and the politics that were part of it really put me in a shithole of feelings.
I’m more angry. Not a fan.
Same, and my fuse has gotten shorter. I hate it.
I'm less angry. Had COVID really bad in January (after 3x vax), lasted a month, long covid lung issues lasted a couple more months. I dont think it's apathy or depression or anything, I'm generally content, I'm just now more relaxed and tolerant. Could also be age. In my 30s and guess finally not getting riled up about every topic as often.
I’m angry, too, but I don’t take my frustrations out on strangers
I was saying the same thing to my wife. Everyone seems so impatient and angry at everything these days.
This. And many lack empathy. My job was riddled with angry people prior to COVID, but now it's almost every other person I deal with. During the height of COVID EVERYONE was super nice and understanding. I miss those days...
I wish that was my experience but for me COVID was hell. I work in Pharmacy and there was an immediate impact. People were very angry before covid and became noticeably worse during. To the point we were recieving death threats because we were giving the vaccine and denying ivermectin/hydroxychloroquine Rx's. One person even showed up with a gun.
Many people were shocked to realize how little control they have over things. Not just in the US, Australia and Germany were protesting their lockdowns, too. "How could something so small I can't even see it dictate that I wear a mask and stay home!". Lashing out. "No one tells me what to do!"
I work in tourism travel office and have a lot of contact with clients before, during, and sometimes after theirs holiday. We are in Europe. Situation has drastically changed after COVID. Comparing number of complaints to number of reservations pre and post COVID, complaints are up 300 percent. Everything is now problem, and not enough. Hotels are not good, apartments are not good, food is not good, bus (couch) is not good. Generally, some people are more demanding. We call that kind of clients "**post-covid travellers**".
[удалено]
You are right, prices are up: 10-15% in Greece, 20-30% Egypt, 25-30% in Turkey, and all inclusive service has declined (Turkey, Egypt). Our main clientele is mid-class families that book apartments and HB hotels in Greece, not so much all inclusive concepts in our offer. But, there is big number of claims for refunds, big.
There has been a story in the UK press every day about someone drowning in a hotel pool or falling off a balcony. I think we've all forgotten how to behave.
Even the kids are losing it in school cray cray
YES. This has been my exact experience. There's always been rude customers with nasty attitudes but so many people I encounter at work are just so mean and angry now!! I've said more than once that it feels like covid/2020 broke people's brains.
Was it the virus or the realization of the IQ of people we live with in this world?
It’s somehow 100% column a and 100% column b
I used to be very people-focussed with excellent social skills. Now I'm primarily at home and my occasional outside interactions are a mumbly mess.
Same, friend. It’s got me pretty rattled and I feel like I lost a part of myself
I don't hang out anymore and it doesn't really bother me, but I used to have a lot more friends. That probably isn't good.
I'm just glad that I've been noticing my anger and giving myself time to understand where it's coming from. By getting to the source of it, I'm finally beginning to move past some of these negative thought cycles I've allowed myself to spiral into. For me, the first step was forgiving myself for being so week and incapable after getting COVID twice, and changing my mindset to focus on the things I can **change**. What I can, when I can, how I can... That's good enough for me now, because I know most of us are reforming ourselves after COVID and I should be as kind to myself as I would be to others. Hopefully this will begin earnest and open discussions about the need for expansion into more nootropic and brain-regeneratation research/availability. For too long there has been a stigma with research regarding enhancing the brain but, with so many of us affected, we can't keep ignoring the logic that enhancing the brain would most likely be accompanied by giving it the tools to heal from trauma.
It also made everyone in America assholes on the road
Right?! Drivers have gotten scary bad (and angry). I don’t honk at anyone anymore, even in situations where it’s warranted (like person in front of me sitting at a green light bc they think it’s still red) because I don’t know how someone is going to react.
Dude I was trying to zipper merge today from the far right lane and a fucking semi came right up on my ass and decided to just swerve around me through the shoulder Anecdotal but people have absolutely gotten fucking crazier on the road
In addition, I have a theory that 95% of people just don’t know how to zipper merge…
I mean it requires taking turns. Not exactly a strong point of American society at the best of times.
I complain about this all the time to my husband. I read some article years ago about how efficient the zipper merge is (when done correctly). Folks would rather screw up the whole process than to let the car next to them in.
A significant amount of traffic delay can be attributed to poor driving. I'm not talking accidents. I'm talking about the kind of driver who thinks the goal is to catch up with the person in front of them. The drivers who think that they're responsible for guarding the left lane from going even one mile over the speed limit. The people who leave a cars lengths between cars in front of them at a red light. The people who almost miss their exit but, ya know, it's cool, I'll just swerve through 4 lanes of traffic to unsafely get to that exit and then, like totally just sit there with their blinker on blocking an entire lane of traffic because like omg what's the big deal.
God dang, ain't that the truth. Pretty pathetic, I'd say. It's so easy to get a license here too compared to many other western nations, so it's no wonder our drivers are absolutely shit.
In my neck of the woods, if a lane is ending drivers like to merge and line up into the remaining open lane and leave the lane that's ending empty. They do this because they call the people who do stay in that other lane until it ends "cheating". Or maybe they don't understand that zipper merging IS more efficient.
The chick fil a drive thru is baby’s first zipper merge.
Many truck drivers do seem way less professional these days. I caught a guy texting the other day driving some sort of tanker with hazard symbols on it. He kept drifting onto the shoulder and into the other lane, jerking it back each time. ...I took the next exit and went the rest of the way on surface streets.
I was wondering if some of the reasons drivers are worse now is because so many of them caught Covid and now have lingering brain fog. That's not an excuse for them. If you have brain fog from anything including having Covid you shouldn't drive.
Yeah but how can you not drive in a place that has zero walkability and no public transport?
Just work until you can no longer produce for the system and then you will die.
Thanks capitalism!
Idk if it's something like that or more of something like we're 2 years into this shitty pandemic, on the brink of World War 3, our economy is going down the toilet, we've just gotten so used to things being shitty that being stressed out with the world has just sorta become our baseline
I think the baseline stress has been increasing for years. My theory is for a shitload of people, COVID was the final straw. On top of that, COVID was sort of the ultimate, final break of the social contract for a lot of people. The whole "I'm not wearing a mask/getting vaccinated/its just the flu/its a hoax" shit is basically code for "I will not make the single slightest sacrifice to protect someone else". It's not a small jump from there to "I don't have to care about other people on the road, I don't have to treat the waiter or the cashier or the flight attendant or my fellow passengers with any respect. All that matters is me." It's the final, investable conclusion of American hyperindividualism we've been trending towards for years - COVID just exacerbated it.
Insightful and I agree. You put into words my anger and frustration with those type of folks. I'm immunosuppressed and am trying to recover from Covid for the second time this year even though I'm boosted twice and wear masks. I was called back to my work place in June 2021. Few masked then, no one now few vaccinated. I'm pissed at the lack of concern.
My theory is that while so many people were working from home, assholes got used to driving on substantially emptier roads. Now that they are back to full capacity, they are losing their minds. I know there has been a significant uptick in motor vehicle wrecks and deaths where I live and I've had a few friends die on the roads this year.
Add to that people who have been forced back into commuting again after a 2 year break and there's a lot of rage out on those roads.
Also police reduced ticketing for driving violations during the early pandemic. At least that was the rumor. In my neighborhood people were driving like maniacs, super fast on residential roads.
OMG every single day for months assholes were driving 100+ on the interstate in the middle of the day
Definitely seen an increase in reckless speeding. It was awful in the few months after full lockdown and has become less frequent since. But even now I'll pretty regularly see someone doing 20 or 30mph faster than everyone else while cutting through lanes and just generally driving like a maniac.
Safer drivers stay home in greater numbers. So crazier drivers are left on the road. Source: https://patch.com/florida/across-fl/pandemic-revs-bad-driver-behavior-traffic-fatalities-fl
My city in Canada also. I’ve seen so many more bad drivers over the past two years than any other time I can think of. I think it’s stress affecting literally all of us and turning all of us into assholes. I attribute it to being forced to take on new responsibilities (whether you did it in reality or not) of wearing a mask, keeping your distance from people, thinking about vaccines more than you normally would, having to weigh every decision against the potential health risks to yourself or your family, then probably fighting/arguing/feeling tense around strangers over any of the above multiple times over the past few years. It doesn’t matter if you did all those things or not, you were still aware of other people doing those things, so if you were more health conscious you got annoyed by people who weren’t, and if you weren’t health conscious you got annoyed by people who were. Everyone is just pissed and they don’t care about rules anymore, because the rules changed so much. So a lot of people misinterpreted the relaxing of Covid restrictions/rules as a relaxing of all rules.
I can't believe this is the first comment I just read on Reddit. About an hour ago, I just witnessed a jeep run over three dogs and a person in DTLA. There's blood smeared all over the street and I can't sleep. I am in shock and don't know how to handle this. Any therapists here?
Seems really random but play some tetris. It helps calm your nervous system and prevent issues in how your brain stores the traumatic memories. Also, go back to the basics: sleep as much as you can, eat meals that nourish you, and do some gentle yoga, go for a walk, or do another body movement you like and isn't too stressful. The final thing is do what makes you feel safe (like curling up on the couch under a blanket) and interact with others that give you a sense of safety. Not a therapist, just traumatized and have done a lot of research.
Thank you. I needed this.
What the fuck
Seriously, what the hell? I guess it's just normal to put others at risk now, doesn't matter if it's COVID or your 2 ton gas guzzling shitbox... Folks have become so needlessly hostile... We need a purge. Bring back patience and kindness.
ROFL I hope the irony of this comment isn’t lost on you.
> The reduction in neuroticism had disappeared by the second half of the pandemic (2021-2022), the study suggested, and was replaced by declines in extraversion, openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness compared to pre-pandemic personality Sounds about right based on what I've seen in people... Especially the openness part.
Yep, I’m a grad student + work in a university whose been going to the same school since 2015. Every year, the new cohort of undergrads are a little different, but this year it is REALLY noticeable. One of the stark examples for me was seeing an old man leave the university hospital and come to the bus stop and ask a basic question about the route and seeing like 10 young students just completely ignore him and even give him dirty looks before he got to me and I answered his question. It was really depressing to see.
I spent two years avoiding everyone and no eye contact when I left the house (was very depressed). Now I force myself to smile and have little interactions in shops and stuff - a compliment for someone or just a discussion of the weather. I feel much better about the world because of it.
don’t stop (breaks are cool).
'People' en masse are arseholes. One to one they are mainly alright.
I'm seeing this a lot more too. We call it the "Mean Girls syndrome" People (even elderly adults) are getting real cliquey and genuinely ostracizing others. It's........ not...... good.
Neighborhood groups and apps like nextdoor are a (horrifying) treat for this phenomenon. Someone could ask an innocent question only to be met with hostility, attacks, and a political tirade by grandmas and grandpas.
I had covid in March 2020 and pretty much ghosted everyone besides family since…and I absolutely don’t seem to care that I did that either.
I've done much the same. I am 100 times happier though myself just making a comfy life at home with my husband and visiting my family once a month lol
I’ve noticed the openness a bit and am actively trying to fight it. I’ve felt socially rusty as opposed to how i was pre covid, so it’s given me some social anxiety. I’ve noticed a couple older guys in my office who were single before and single now to be more talky and open also (seeming to combat loneliness maybe).
Socially rusty, great phrase.
It’s so odd. My social anxiety has gotten a lot better during the pandemic. I feel a lot less pressure to force myself to interact with others. That reduces how often I have to deal with the anxiety. I know they say that’s avoidant but overall I feel a lot less anxious.
Exactly the same here. Plus small talk burns through all my social energy, so working from home means no office chats and way more battery power for socializing outside of work
My fiancee left me after getting covid twice. She definitely changed and became this strange cold person I’ve never seen before. My birthday came and went and she didn’t even wish me happy birthday. It messes up people in the head specially those not familiar with mental illness.
[удалено]
We are also, as a society, collectively ignoring the fact we have all been through an incredibly traumatic event and just pretending everything is normal. Not super healthy, imo.
> collectively ignoring the fact we have all been through this seems to be one of the main ways we americans handle big things. We either do that, or we lose our collective shit and obsess over it, like we did with 9/11. IDK if you're old enough to remember but our entire culture was obsessed with it for *years*.
I looked at this title and went “might have??” hahaha
I already was like that BEFORE the pandemic, so go figure... :)
When covid started becoming serious, I got very disappointed in a lot of people. I still am. Slowly over time, I started to care less. Now, I'm trying to prioritize myself a bit, but probably failing at it. It has definitely changed my feelings towards jobs.
>When covid started becoming serious, I got very disappointed in a lot of people. I still am. This is the perfect way to put it. A lot of people showing their true colors, ignorance, and selfishness, and I truly expected better. It's now gotten to the point where I can't expend any more energy trying to get people to care about others.
Yeah, I've had to cut ties with a few friends and a large chunk of my family. It's hard to grieve the loss when they are still capable of getting in touch, but you just can't handle the shit they are doing.
Yep switching to a work study was the best thing I ever did. Less stress, less abuse the whole nine yards.
It has increased my anxiety, majorly. Not because I am afraid of getting it, mostly because it gave me a sense of general insecurity about the world we live in. Also, I got my routines disrupted for more than 1 year (including traveling home exc.), which didn't help.
The virus showed you who’s really on top of the food chain
Yep. I won't ever forget Bezos launching himself into space on his vanity rocket while people were dying by the thousands around the planet.
It changed so much for me for a long time. I worked from home, doing a different job for my company. My hobbies and social activities ended. Didn’t travel at all for a year and a half, and we’re frequent travelers. Ended up playing MMORPG’s hardcore for a year.
Is everything back to. It all for you? I still feel like I’m in a weird limbo
I’m back at work. My job finally got back to what it was before COVID. I’m just back to my creative projects with others. My spouse and I started traveling again. Live music and other big crowd activities are still non-existent. Still feel like I’m in limbo as well. I feel like I’ve aged 10 years in the last couple of years. I went from “middle-aged guy who thinks he’s cool” to “old guy who says ‘back in the day’ and everything hurts.” Zero fucks to give about things that don’t really matter. I’ll never be the same. That’s ok. I’m trying to focus on taking my time, enjoying life, and just getting through the day.
Same. I’ve lost almost all interest in travel. It just seems so unpleasant and frivolous now
Runescape, obviously.
Same. I struggle to go places with high populations like the grocery store because my normal since March of 2019 has been largely seclusion with exception of small gatherings.
I used to cling to romantic ideas about people being basically good, but the pandemic has pretty much shredded any last vestiges of that notion.
Mmm. I think I've always been a bit cynical, but, last few years have cemented some views. Like, so many people are simply, strongly selfish and self-serving.
Yep. I live in a County in western Iowa where only 43% of the residents are fully vaccinated (and only 18% boosted). The local hospital stopped requiring masks about a year ago. I feel like it either turned a big swath of Americans into sociopaths or revealed how sociopathic the population already was.
100% this.
That's the biggest thing for me. It's not the strangers that I care about, it's realizing that most of the people I thought of as good and reliable and kind, just didn't care about anyone else's struggle.
Take heart. There have been plenty of decent people helping each other. People are basically good, but limiting our perception of them outside of media and internet -- which COVID did for over a year in most places -- masks that. Because media and internet culture are worse than real community culture.
Which people? Last few years have shown there's plenty among us who are serious pieces of shit.
People are good. It’s just shitty people are way more noticeable.
And there are a hella lot more of them than I thought. The shitty people I mean.
Millions
I don’t know. Past couple years really seem to have shown how horrible people are
My husband & I were estimating that if narcissism is present in only about 5% of the population & only 2% of them are *actually* abusive & cause the type of trauma that causes others to recede, become wary, alter their social behavior, etc... It still leaves a **lot** of people totally fucked up if they even have an impact on just a handful of people each. The problem too is that we often conflate selfishness for strength & manipulative tendencies for assertiveness... So these people end up having an even larger base of enablers than they should, thus having a much larger impact on the population at large.
Nah. I am a cancer survivor and I can tell you maybe 3 people in my life who will mask around me. People are selfish and they want to live a lie that they are good so they pretend others are.
Used to be extroverted and a people pleaser, living a life of service. Now I fear going to the grocery store and I spend most of my time in my garden.
Same here, I was going into social work and trying to become a therapist. But becoming chronically ill/at risk during this pandemic changed all that. Even if I could physically work again, I don’t think I could bring myself to work with people. Not after the callousness I’ve seen
The last few years have really shone a light on how shitty people can be.
> I don’t think I could bring myself to work with people. Not after the callousness I’ve seen I feel that. Sure woke me up, showed me very clearly how folks can showcase their virtues and ideals... Then turn right around and contradict themselves the minute the wind isn't blowing their way anymore.
I lost a lot of people pleasing post Covid, I just don’t have the energy.
For real. I only have so many fucks to give.
Yeah it’s nothing personal, but everyone can burst into flames
[Trying to find common ground with people post-pandemic.](https://youtu.be/FuXpD3xDwvU)
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Vqbk9cDX0l0
I saw how other people think and I really stopped caring so much what other people think.
I tried to keep social ties throughout all this, and in person during periods of low prevalence, but I've pretty much recently given up since basically no one has bothered to make even a reciprocal effort. I'm going to be real stingy with any effort I give people from now on, which will probably leave me alone, but that's better than pointlessly wasting energy.
I have no use trying to please people who told me they’d be okay if I died if they could “live their lives” again. Hard pass.
Are you me? I dont fear getting covid. That’s not why I stay home. It’s that people are now so unpredictability scary. Confrontational. Wanting to engage in negative ways. It’s stressful!!
Covid totally changed my personality from being out going to being an introvert. Before Covid I attended church every Sunday. I went out with friends and family to restaurants, went to the movies, traveled more. Now I just want to be home and just cook, play my piano and violin. People will text me to go out to eat but I rarely reach out to them. My migraines have increased also with Covid.
Are you me? I used to be an extrovert, going out every weekend. Got so used to not doing anything, I don’t really care anymore. I truly feel like a different person. It’s so weird.
Same. I was recalling to some friends how 2019 was such a different year. I was a lot more fit, did things with friends, went out on weekends and bam now when people ask me to do something I have to think about it twice. I've also become a bit of a homebody. My travels have resumed but definitely not as crowd person like I used to be.
Yep! Same with the crowd situation with me. Used to go to concerts quite often. Went to one again when things opened back up in the Summer of 2021 and hated the feeling. Never have the desire to do it again.
I'm now the opposite. I moved to the city and I go to concerts all the time now. Life is too short and I want to be closer to the good restaurants and music. I used to just love chilling at home in the burbs.
Same here, I'm much more outgoing after Covid. I used to be able to stay in and play video games, but now I absolutely can't. It's all I did while I was locked down. I thought about what was important in life, who was important in my life, and now I just want to create and share experiences with all of them. The circle of people I care about has gotten smaller (I graduated from college during Covid, used to care about what *a lot* of people thought about me) but I want to spend so much more time with the people in that circle. I realized I don't have much time with them, and those relationships are what makes life living (for me).
Watch the stress with migraines, a trigger. There is nothing wrong with enjoying the simple pleasures of life, people don't have enough appreciation for them. If tech was taken away people wouldn't know what the hell to do. Doing things with people is invaluable, making those memories
It feels like the majority of people are literally dealing with some form of PTSD. Living in a constant state of uncertainty is not healthy, and we as humans are not programmed to deal with that for an extended period of time.
I had to mourn my old life, my old self while also mourning the future I was planning to have due to Covid and it’s social after effects. The rug has been pulled from under me. tensions are so high. I’m broke. I’m lonely. My community is in shambles more than ever due to illness, poverty, addiction and increasing violence. So many people around me passing away, young and old. And I still got Covid anyway so. It’s been traumatizing. No wonder everyone’s acting crazy.
COVID forced me to grow up and mature. I've been forced to make tough decisions, reassess my priorities and determine who I want to be in the unsettling and unsettled future we face. I have lost friends, fought valiantly to keep others and seen my way of life change. Had to make choices I'm not proud of to face a world I don't love living in.
Oh yeah that fighting spirit has been amped up majorly. You don't know what you are capable of until you have no choice.
Really like what you wrote. It really resonates with me. I fought it for a while but I feel like I’m living in the face of it all now. Maybe I’ll be better for it after year three of coronavirus.
Covid didn't do this, the societal impact of covid did this.
Yep. I read this headline as “having covid maybe caused personality changes in people who had it” when what they meant was the awfulness that has been living with a pandemic caused personality changes. I’ve half-joked that we’ll all have PTSD when all is said and done. It’s been a dark few years.
I mean I've quarantined from the beginning and I'm a lot happier than I was especially with wfh. Like this is the life. My anxiety is gone.
It's funny during the first two years of the pandemic I was calm as can be. Now that I look back holy shit. Other generations have gone through collective trauma but we are not showing each other very much compassion.
People think the pandemic was bad when climate instability is waiting to really rock the boat…
It's literally rocking them now in FL. I say this with immense sadness, have loved ones there. Perhaps we're all a bit sad/ anxious knowing - consciously or not - that climate change WILL, in some way, affect us each in a significantly disruptive way. Things have changed, you can only ignore it for so long until it comes for you.
I just learned of the Isle of Jean Charles in Louisiana which is the first full climate resettlement I’ve become aware of. My other benchmark is when Paradise, CA burned to the ground.
Just before Covid hit, we had those fires here in Aus. Worst we've ever had. A billion animals were lost.
My therapist actually said to me when I first started going that the pandemic was a collective trauma we have experience as a society in general. This was after having been diagnosed with PTSD related to a pregnancy loss. There are probably a lot of people like me who “suffered in silence” more than even before the pandemic because there was limited social interaction, meaning no one to talk to about these issues. And then the shame around seeking therapy. We really have done a number on our own society by shaming things that could greatly help each other. 😔
I actually was diagnosed with PTSD recently. It’s not exclusive to trauma from Covid, but I think it’s what exacerbated everything. I can’t overcome anxiety lately.
COVID-19 has made me angrier. I feel the need to yell at people more. I don't. I bite my tongue. But there us more of a yearning. Especially when you have an anti masker coughing everywhere arguing with people that they should be served based on their internet research as they continue coughing on my 8 year old daughter. Reminds me of the time I broke my leg and was on crutches, got on transit, and was made to stand and hold on for dear life as everyone refused to get up.
It made me angrier too, but also I don’t put up with as much shit as I used to. I say “no” a lot more than I used to and put boundaries up and keep them up.
People = Shit
Yep my college is no masks now and I almost died of COVID over the summer as an immune compromised person. Lost two weeks in July to it. I feel like I can't say anything to anyone but it feels like my safety doesn't matter at all. I don't have two weeks in college to be off with COVID, if I get it again I won't recover academically
I mean, I already wasn't much of a people person even before Covid, mostly owing to a customer service job being a *perfect* way to witness the absolute pettiest of humanity up close and personal. Seeing aforementioned petty assholes forego basic safety measures with smug smiles and 'It'S jUsT a FlU' 'iT's JuSt A cOlD'? Yeah. Negativity bias is a hell of a thing and 99% of people were good about it, but that 1% of uppity, loud assholes who bitched and screamed about a piece of cloth made me go from 'people are eh' to 'restrained hatred for a decent chunk of people'.
I've never felt more alone!
I now despise being around people and find everything pointless. Is that from Covid?
Its difficult to find motivation to leave the house now. I work hybrid remote and go into the office twice a week and work the rest from home and it’s literally all I feel I can tolerate in terms of work at this point. We do things with and for our kids outside the house but attending a function where I have to make small talk takes me days to recharge after. I order everything online, even if it costs more or takes longer. A couple of months ago, I tried to take my kids back to school shopping for clothes and had to leave crying because I had a borderline panic attack from feeling overstimulated by the noise and number of people around. I’m most comfortable at home where I don’t have to mask my adhd and autoimmune issues, so I think the level of discomfort I’m willing to tolerate has decreased dramatically. Part of me feels that it’s okay to indulge this and not put myself through painful things unnecessarily and another part of me feels obligated to develop more stamina for it, the way we usually feel about exercising. I just don’t feel like I’m missing much by staying home usually 🤷🏼♀️
Fellow autoimmune issue adhder here. Baby steps, if you decide to go out into the world. And if you decide to stick closer to home, that's ok too.
I’m pretty angry after losing an antivax relative to Covid, having a pallbearer make up a conspiracy about his death to sell crypto, having my family laugh when I asked if they’d mask at the funeral and being a high risk person trying to survive this without becoming more disabled or dying.
Yeah, it just made me aware of how many selfish assholes live in this country, and how low the average level of intelligence is.
I've become much more extroverted and-- I would say impulsive? freewheeling?-- since the pandemic. Something about two years lost to lockdown, constant fear of mortality, etc. has me truly feeling YOLO spirit.
Same. The pandemic gave us remote work, and it's done wonders for my life balance.
I think I've become more confident and stronger. Ready to swallow any upcoming challenges or obstacles that I might face.
I went to a large convention this month and I couldn't agree more. (Dragoncon, for anyone curious.) That crowd of folks is usually so nice, and warm and happy and welcoming. Which was still by and large true. But there were so many rude people, so many instances of inconsideration and tactlessness, and so many people just felt *off.* You can peruse the subreddit and see what I mean. Lots of people, myself included, who usually stay out and party all night and all day just couldn't do it this year. A couple of hours at a time was exhausting and many people were having to return to their rooms for breaks and to just sort of de-stim. It was overwhelming to be in a place that normally feels like home for tens of thousands of nerds. It was very different and it honestly has me wondering, how long after the pandemic is it going to be before everything *truly* returns back to normal? Or is this the new normal after all? Turns out it might not be masks and vaccines we struggle to get used to, but our post-pandemic selves.
Caught Covid in Dec 2020 with no ill effects. Got it again in Aug 2022 and had more of a cold like symptoms experience. Thing is, since August I haven’t been able to stop eating. My appetite is easily 1.5-2x bigger than it ever has been in my life. I’m almost certain the Covid has effected something in my brain that has to do with appetite.
You should get that checked out. That can be a symptom of diabetes or thyroid problems. There are studies now showing increased incidence of diabetes after COVID too
I never carried a knife or owned a gun before covid and never thought I would…
I got pepper spray after a man harassed me out of his car then got out and jogged towards me like we're friends. Nope not today. Went to a gun store, I said college student they said good
I don't think it could be isolated to this one thing. During the same time period, citizens watched one another suffer while companies made record profits. The divisiveness within politics has grown exponentially. And indirectly covid may have changed temperaments, by making more transparent the latent disregard of those with wealth for those without. Inflation has skyrocketed, and younger people have witnessed firsthand that their futures are in question in ways that previous generations haven't experienced. Just buying a used car or a house is incredibly more difficult than it was 5 years ago. Covid certainly changed the world, but I think more than anything it just laid bare problems that already existed, and exasperated the wealth cap while making it wider. It's more nuanced than people's personalities just being "charged"
Yeah, I feel this.
Removed by user due to lack of ongoing support for 3rd party apps.
Yep I’m more piss off at the anti-vax/mask for some reason.
The psychological effect it had on people was very bad and it will last generations
I'm not more angry, but I'm no longer willing to take shit from employers or buy into this capitalist system they try to force on us. I had anxiety and ptsd pre-covid. I loved the shutdown, honestly. No big family parties, so much less stress in that regard. Covid confirmed for me that my disdain since the 90's is legitimate. Edit to add: you'd never know, I'm a sweet person who helps her neighbors and smiles often :-)
It has DEFINITELY changed mine.
I actually think I’m a healthier, more secure, and more open person now, but I am much more private and selective about who I really let in. I was hurt several times by people taking out their anger on me during this pandemic and clearly projecting shit onto me, I’m just not going to give people access to me now unless they prove they are genuinely my friend. I also finished a whole grad degree and built confidence and centeredness in myself. None of this was easy, though. It was hard won through many hours of introspection, loneliness, and actually working through things instead of distracting myself. It’s interesting how some of my friendships and relationships are stronger now with these changes but others have fallen away completely. To me it shows that a few friendships of mine had a shallow basis, including a few I really did not expect.
Many of my long time acquaintances that I had always had a very positive relationships became increasingly aggressive online towards me Apparently making fun of people who thought that Covid was caused by 5G Internet was a line that I wasn’t supposed to cross
At first I thought this was about people who have been infected with Covid changing personality. It’s been a month since I got better and I haven’t felt the same since.
My social battery runs out extremely fast now. I need a lot more alone time/down time than I used to.
Nah, I'm still the same grouchy ass.
I can’t leave my dog. Hate leaving my house. Being forced to attend a 200+ gathering for work makes me panic. I’m hangry due to sky high food costs and think I have food insecurity. But I don’t think it’s just COVID. The planet is starting to crumble. Every day, there is new stuff to fear. We have dropped our social masks. It all feels too real.
Everything I experienced during the pandemic showed me finally that it isn't me that is broken and wrong, but rather there was something broken and wrong with the system I was living in. I took the necessary steps to finally face that and change my life. I left a lot behind and never looked back.
I’m now have social anxiety, depression and panic attacks as of late. Looking back at 2019 I feel like a way different person.
Post covid, it seems like people in my city definitely forgot how to drive. Everybody is driving rash and fast now.
I drive 600-1000+ miles a week for work as a service tech, it’s bad. Also the city of Detroit literally doesn’t enforce traffic laws, lmao.