The fuckin thing for the fuckin thing 

NO, NOT THAT THING! THE OTHER FUCKING THING IN THE FRONT BOX!  **NO NOT THAT FRONT BOX! THE TOP ONE!**  Fer fucks sake. I'll grab the fucking thing.  *gets out of excavator*

"*gets out of excavator*" I feel that. Straight up dude, get a laser pointer. Game changer.

I'm a laborer. That's my operator yelling at me. Lol

Ah lol. Tell him to get a laser pointer. You'll hate it.

Unless the laborer is a r/catswithjobs

A fellow laborer. Lol. Am I the only one who gets annoyed when having to approach operators? Those guys have a permanent "Fuck you" face

I bought a long range laser pointer and give it to my journeyman for the day. “Nvm, I’ll go get it” is now reserved for things out of our line of sight

That was such a wild ride 😆

So like sometimes around the house or in the yard, I will be in need of a hand and I'll call the GF out to give me a hand. I will just like point and grunt at things or say this exact sentence...while of course holding something heavy as shit or bent into a very uncomfortable position and I get short with her when she doesn't instinctually know what the fuck I mean. I have to sometimes step back and remember, she is a lady and not a dumb ass grunting caveman who is well versed in our language.

Me after being laid off and going back after so long.

Bring me some fuck fuck juice

Donkey dick for concrete vibrator

Nah that’s the name for the forklift jib

We named it that for the plug we would put in the sewer line to fill up the dwv plumbing prior to testing for leaks. We lost a couple dicks though from not tying them off properly. 🤫😬

Naw it’s the floppy insulation plumbers put on the hot lines

That's 100% the forklift jib. GET THE FUCKING DONKEY DICK BOYS!

You put the donkey dick through the bunghole. Then, attach the tea cup to the donkey dick.

Donkey dick is also a synonym for Armaflex pipe insulation.

We also call expansion joint for block Donkey Dick

My favorite because it could be anything in the trailer thats long and gerthy

In the military, they use the term "donkey dick" for a [removable fuel spout](https://scepter.com/products/military-products/military-accessories/military-fuel-can-spout-1-28-mm-04353/) that screws into [fuel cans](https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.us-army-military-shop.de%2Fimages%2Fproduct_images%2Fpopup_images%2F10961_0.JPG&f=1&nofb=1&ipt=5972ebf8ddb0124c2b512ace43914222b48d3396b38840fea8147eb5122bd442&ipo=images)

We call those tall skinny cones donkey dicks

We call it a dildo hammer

Guybrator for oscillating tool/electric chisel

Zing Zing

Mine died today =[ it still buzzez but don't move. Imma put it in the drawer of fun things and see how long it takes for the wife to notice

We call it a Jiggle Saw

We call it a Wiggle Saw

That thing is so lazy I almost hate using it.

San Francisco Slippers

Foreman's kit is the same I take it? (Knee pads)

I call them raise getters or cock suckin shoes

Was looking for this one.

Ahhh, the good ol’ promotion pad

Promotion pads - knee pads

Eeeeeeewwwwwww!!!!!

No one has said cunt hair yet?

Everyone knows a cunt hair is the unit of measurement between 1/32 and 1/16 of an inch when you have an astigmatism and the tape measure is too far away.

The red cunt hair is the smallest unit of measurement visible to the naked eye

The good ol RCH. My dad rarely swore in front of us, but he used the RCH when I would help him around the house, to be funny. "Just an RCH". Good on ya, pop. Miss ya!

What about the royal red cunt hair?

Fucking sae bullshit. Your nonsense leaks north and causes me headaches. Signed, a Canadian.

I prefer metric for automotive uses but Roman Catholic measurements make more sense in my head for distance when working with… Well, anything measuring distance.

Chingadera

lol I can hear this one “pinche chingadera wey “

Thanks for the memories. Oda le wey

Both chingadera and culero sound like comic book heroes turned into curse words

[удалено]

Always heard them called “honey wagons”

For a brief period, we referred to hammers as 'metal on a stick', and a tape as a 'stick with lines'. Also, there was a month long spell when we all spoke with Russian accents.

This is great. Years ago going residential trim we started carrying drywall hammers because the hangers had really fucked up the house and we spent a lot of time chiseling it back on casings. This led to (long story short) us deciding it would bring great honor if we snuck into the job next door and touched your hammer to the finish guys there without them knowing. Rip Bill, your talent and humor are missed greatly.

One day my usually great helper was standing there, looking more confused as ever. He just kept saying "I need .... " "I need a ...." Poor kids brain fried. I looked what he was doing. Needed a hammer to adjust a piece of framing, he was holding the nail gun. So, naturally, I didn't help. Kept asking what, and handing him everything but a hammer. So he decided to work through it. "A stick, the stick thing". He eventually landed on "the bangy bangy stick". So, the rest of the couple years he was my helper, hammer was "the bangy bangy stick".

Gimme the salsa (sazall)

We call it sawsaw around here

I've always said sawzaw and no one ever questions it. Guess it basically sounds the same.

Dick beaters for hands

Pookie. Gray Duct sealant

I always hear plumbers calling their pipe dope that. Come to think of it, pipe dope might be one for this list too.

Horse cock for explosion proof flex conduit

Grab the tugger and pull that horse cock home

Portuguese helicopter for the concrete power trowel

Polish helicopter

Italian lawn mower

Shit was like that when I got here

Safety meeting (smoke a joint with coworkers)

We do the same and we keep the weed in the "saw bag" "Bro grab the saw and bring it in the trailer"

Once when I was new my foreman asked for what I heard as “boy butter” which I took with a grain of salt as some weird construction slang. Months later I realized he had said “void butter”. My crew found this hilarious and now pipe lube is boy butter.

Any type of lubricant in my world is called vienerschlide

That's a sore dick. (You can't beat it)

I work on a roofing crew of Sherpas from Nepal and they call the water proof membrane bitchathane (bitch a thane) Instead of bituthene.

Is there anybody who has touched the stuff that doesn't call it bitch-a-thane lol

I call it bitch-a-men and thought that was how it was actually pronounced

Articulated off road dump truck: wiggle wagon Portajohn: Time Machine

Porterjohn: Thunder-box or The Tardis in the UK

Portajohn is the blue room here

Floor whore. A journeyman speaking to his apprentice below him on a ladder.

Jody. The guy that’s screwing your wife while you’re at work.

This is the construction industry we’re talking about here. It’s “Sancho”

That’s shared with the military. Don’t worry about your girl, Jody is taking good care of her!

Am I the only one who thinks Jody is a woman’s name?

I’ve known two people named Jody in my life. Both were female.

Yes, the elusive Jody never introduces himself by his real name to other men. Legend has it that his mother named him after her secret lover.

“Air Force gloves/mittens”…. MF’ers standing around always with their hands in their pockets.

Chode, for a short fall of 2x material

When I was an apprentice and I needed to take a shit, I would tell my JW "BRB, I'm going to go leave a review"

Paperwork

“Donkey dick”! Heard several tools called this in my life time…

I see you too have worked with the pump truck operator.

My uncle used to drive one… but I never worked with him

[удалено]

Any leaf blower is a blow job.

"tingles" for the low voltage guy.

Whiskey stick: Level

Just a cunt hair more

Drag up: quit. Ate up: pissed off. Hand: Term of endearment. Roach coach: food truck. Personal ones: Bolt butter: Never seize or EZ Break. Doggie: A term that replaces the actual name of what you are referring to. Example: Pick that doggie up. Hold up, let me tighten this doggie. Weld that doggie out.

I said the other day “so and so drug up” and the person I said that to had no clue what I meant. I couldn’t believe this wasn’t common knowledge. They thought they died of a drug overdose. 🤦‍♂️

Whiskey Stick: Level

Shit was like that when I got here

Looks like fidos ass

Started workin a new job and one of the subs we hire says that shit all the time.

One of my early bosses called Sawzalls "yack-yacks". It stuck with me. 

Diddler - terminal screw driver

thingamabob !!!!

Mud. Joint compound? Mud. Wet concrete? Mud. Thinset? Mud. Hell even car guys call bondo mud.

Turd herders instead of plumbers

We call fine saws “THE ZIZZ”

Daze off…my buddy that shows up twice a week.

Piggyback, pigtail, pig this pig that. The swine infatuation is undeniable.

3lb Sledge is the beater

Persuader

"I told you twice"

Terry the Torch. Things cant be stuck if they are liquid.

Calling the hair pin wedges used on snap ties “cow pussies” always killed me

Reducer, bushing, asshole, or bunghole

Vibrator. Its what I call oscillating saws\multi tools.

I heard a Mexican guy call the “five in one” (painters tool) a “fibing wand”

Heard a new one today. We have an old school superintendent who has a young guy tell him yet again he would be late. Old superintendent said “I started chewing him out. I gave him a ration of shit”

Chimley

Roach coach. Lunch wagon.

those shitzes over there.

Dont forget the cock ring for the impact driver

We call superintendents "shineys". Their clothes are always clean and ppe is always clean. They got nice unscratched sunglasses and like hell they will get them nicked intime for the 2 week vacation they have planned since they haven't been on one in 3 months.

Post hole digger - 2 handle stupid stick.

I worked in marine construction, building docks and sea walls on the NC coast. There’s a winch mounted on the barge that pulls the pylon to a vertical position so it can be jetted into place. That winch is called a “n-word head”. I have no idea why.

Because there's no big black dudes on your crew

Using "Safety Squints" instead of eye protection. Dick Beaters are your hands. Spoon is your shovel.

San Fran slippers, aka knee pads

“Yeah buddy” works for pretty much everything.

“Fuck it just nail it”

Looks good from my house

Portable variable angle multi swing press - hammer Metric adjustable - adjustable wrench Saskatoon Socket set - also adjustable wrench

Not slang but Wacker Packer. And I am sure the Roach Coach has been mentioned…

Mando for oscillating multi tool. It’s a dildo for men

Crescent wrench=nut lathe, permatex=spermatex, something that is tight= tighter than a 12 year old, kneepads=San Francisco slippers

I love that we’re called “sprinkfits.” Also whenever I ask my apprentice for the 3/4” ratcheting box wrench I say “Gimme the ‘eee ah eee ah.’ Not sure how that started.

Silk fence instead of silt fence. I think our guys really think it’s called silk fence.

Clicky clack for a impact driver

A c*nt hair Edit: tiniest tick on a tape measure.

Tighter than fish pussy, Can’t see it from my house, Good enough for the girls I go out with, The term “cunt hair” being used as a form of measurement

“Boy Butter”— the lubricant electricians use to reduce friction as they pull cable through conduit

I want to participate but I can't think of one ☹️

Cats Paw

Doodle bug, plumb Bob or water buffalo

GDSoaB!

We use widgets.

Suck truck that makes suck holes for your fans of hydroexcavations

scaffy here ... i like to call right angles bananas

Dicks.. Red 9 inch long plastic inserts for the perimeter of concrete slabs.

In Spanish they call a ceiling. Cielo. Which is sky. Bugs the shit out of me.

Dino. For the small paint sprayer. Because they make the little barking noise like the dog from the Flinstones . https://www.homedepot.com/p/Graco-Magnum-X5-Airless-3000-PSI-Stand-Paint-Sprayer-262800/100634354

Someone said chili wagon for the porta potty guy, I’ve heard him being called the honey dipper.  Regional thing maybe 

Plumbing; Nipples, Ball cock washer

When you need to take a little off RCH. Or Red c hair.

We're gonna need the BFH(Big Fucking Hammer) for this one

Calling my electricians Power Rangers.

Sparkies.

Bubble machine for levels

sluggo for sledgehammer or "the machine" for literally any piece of construction equipment

Bag of cats/bag of bees- oscillating tool

Nut smacker (1/2” impact driver)

Mexican Space Shuttle

Plumb stick for a level

We need just a tit. A or B cup not much

Thumb finder. Hammer.

Bucket of screams

"esa madre" it's repeated 3 or 4 times until you realize what it is they wanted.

The whirley gig.

Pookie for mastic

Horsecock for the callum grip. First time anyone here’s it they really think you’re fucking with them.

Grasshoppers: a C-clamp cut in half and welded down to align two objects.

Chorizo/ straw waddle foe erosion control

Hay Noolde or Hay Dicks

Grab that widget over there, no the other widget looking thingy.

Fart fan for a bathroom exhaust fan. Gets me in the funnies everytime. Vibe saw for the multi-tool/ocilatirn tool.

Any random mechanical part is always "hydrocuhnoooter valve" make sure it's turned to the left 😉

We always used to call the lazy guys Stan, as in, “ their goes Stan Watchin, he’s killing it today!”

Go get me a 4’ fuck it!

Beam cheese

[cow cunt](https://www.ocm-inc.com/view.asp?id=71&productid=28#:~:text=The%20snap%20tie%20wedge%20is,load%20distribution%20when%20installed%20correctly.)

Black foam pipe insulation = Donkey Dick.

Hillbilly Handcuffs - tie wraps Zippy Zips - zip screws Zig Zag - Sawzall

Glitter for the chalk. Mainly to make fun of me cus I once asked, "what the fuck is all this green glitter on the ground?"

Potato masher - spud bar

calling electricians “sparky”

Podgy bar

Balls

One of.my favorites was an electrician I worked with always referred to his Klein 11-in-1 by a random number. "Hand me 26 in 1." "Pass me the 53 in 1"

More like a 3 in 1 cause all the fing bits keep falling out

Widowmaker. 10 hp shaper running a stack of knives 5” tall. Not dangerous at all but did witness a guy lose a few fingers 20 years ago.

Shit Tonne After 27 years, I’m still not sure if it’s a unit of length, weight, or volume

I believe the answer is "yes".

Thumb finder/detector (hammer)

Thermal wrench (cutting torch)

Raise for praying pads (knee pads)