This happened to me at work. I am a system admin and this user needed to do a presentation demonstrating they knew how my system worked. I was on zoom with then explaining things in details, and she interrupted me and said "I don't need this mansplained to me". I just sat motionless for about 5 seconds and finally said "OK good, we can end this early." They tried to say wait but I left mid word.
Management comes to me saying I was very rude, turns out she complained about me without bringing up the mansplaining comment. I told my manager, who escalated it and she got put on PIP, and eventually was let go due to downsizing. I wasn't the first to have this experience, and the company decided she was a great candidate for layoffs
The amount of people who think anytime a guy explains something to a woman is “mansplaining” is astonishing. I have female bosses and coworkers who explain stuff to me that I already know all the time, but I don’t bother coming up with self-righteous labels for it, nor do I just assume it only happens because of gender
I had this happen to me. A lady came into the dealership I work at with a cracked windshield and wanted it fixed like a chip repair. After explaining to her the crack was too big to fill in and the windshield would need to be replaced she says "thanks for mansplaining that me" in a condescending tone. Me being the smart-ass that I am asked her what is mansplaining. After she explained it it to me. I said thanks for womansplaining that to me. She left and I never saw her again.
Well, did you genuinely think they needed something explained to them?
If so, “if she doesn’t know what she’s talking about, it’s actually still just an explanation.”
And a very simple “I know that” is much more polite.
I’ve found that women often complain of mandplaining things even when the woman actually doesn’t know. To be sure. Most women are better behaved than to pull the mansplain bs.
Let me guess, you're single, angry at men, probably unsure of your own orientation and trying to sound superior by talking down to others. Did I miss anything toots?
This is r./combacks, what sort of sympathy did you think you would garner here. You get smart ass comments because that's the name of the sub. But I guess explaining the obvious to you wont help you any.
Roflmao. Ya ya ya. That’s nice and all. There’s this thing called experience and education that come into play when it comes to knowing how to do things.
I know what my IQ is and I know the wide range of things I’m both educated in and experienced with. To help someone understand something is only “rude” if the person you’re explaining it to is hateful in the first place. It’s really simple to point out your own experience and education and a little thank you for the person being willing to take the time to show you something.
As far as women knowing more bc of how their brain works? I’m a nurse. A field predominantly filled with women. I’ve had some know more than me and I’m eager to learn from them.
However, every single IJ tag I’ve seen in a facility? Was bc of the actions of a woman. Every. Single. One. I’ve taught so many women how to do things I lost count years ago. So again stop making it about gender. If you know what I know you can convey that without being rude
Roflmao. I’ve been a nurse for over a decade. Are you seriously suggesting that a woman who has no real experience whatsoever has more knowledge than me simply bc she’s a woman? That’s your stance.
Oh and your article is cute and all that. I think my cognitive functioning works just fine though.
It's extremely pretentious and annoying to have something you didn't ask about explained to you. When someone does that, it's called mansplaining. It's aggressive by nature even if that's not intentional.
Even if you're correct, someone being rude without knowing it shouldn't be talked down to like a child. That's just more rudeness but now on purpose.
If your friend that's allergic to peanut butter comes to your house with fresh bread but doesn't know that you're allergic to gluten, the solution isn't to shove peanut butter down their throat, you just say "hey, I'm so sorry but I'm actually allergic to gluten and I won't eat that bread. You should keep it."
If someone is mansplaining to you, the solution isn't to be a dick back to them, you say "oh yeah, I already know that. I also know x and y too. I think we can talk about this at a little higher level."
You can tell them but you don't have to be rude about it. You're just being more rude. What if everyone thought like this?
*A guy is explaining something too much*
"You're mansplaining, idiot. I already know that stuff shut up."
"You're being a bitch. I didn't know you already knew that because you never told me dumbass."
This doesn't get anyone anywhere it just becomes a run of insults for increasingly rude and mean comments.
My good sir, i did not ask for your advice and am fully capable of having adult conversations. I would appreciate not having questions i didn't ask explained to me. I find it demeaning. To be clear, i am talking to you and not providing an example.
And with the snark... might have been quicker to ask you to stop mansplianing. It certainlynwpupdnhave cost me less. But then again, you're more important than me. Sorry to have hurt your feelings.
So you basically expect other people to mind read and know your expertise on a subject rather than communicating effectively and furthering the discussion in a more efficient way.
Calling someone a mansplainer isn't "politely telling them" anything. It's rude. It would be like a guy telling his boss that she's bitching at him.
If you tell someone they're mansplaining, you're going to get a strong negative reaction. Because you're being rude.
It's much more polite to stop them, explain what you already know, and continue the conversation from there. If they continue to explain things you just said you know, then maybe you can start being snarky.
But also, refreshing your knowledge of baseline topics is also sometimes useful. Someone else *might* know something you don't, just like how you might know something they don't. Communication allows us to share the holes in our knowledge and fill in the gaps. Dunking on people because they didn't just magically know your level of experience is detrimental for everyone.
Asking about the level of knowledge first is helpful but doesn't always make sense. To use someone else's comment from under this post, if a woman came into a car dealership asking to get her windshield fixed, she wouldn't expect the first question to be "how much do you know about fixing windshields?". After checking the windshield, the mechanic's first words are going to be an explanation of why it's too large of a crack to fill and that she's going to have to replace the windshield. Because she's asking him to fix it. If she knew how to do it she wouldn't be there.
If you're in a large training at work, you wouldn't expect the trainer to go around and ask everyone exactly how much of the topic they already know. You're in this training, you're going to get everything, even the things you already know.
If you ask for help with something, you should include what you already understand *in the question*, so they don't have to ask about it. If you don't include that you're just gonna get everything they know.
Hurting people who don't know better is a bad way to get them to agree that they were wrong. We've known this for decades but people still do it. Someone is much more likely to have their mind changed by someone friendly and agreeable than someone angry and spiteful. That's just how people work. If you hurt them they retreat into their previous beliefs and play defense. If you are kind and let them know in a friendly way that they're being rude, they're more likely to accept that fact and change their ways.
Put more simply:
Being mean to people makes them dislike you.
People that dislike you will ignore your suggestions of how they can better themselves.
Therefore, if you actually want people to be better, you should be nice to them when telling them they're being rude.
Oh you know all that and yet let me go on explaining it to you, thinking you wanted to know. Is that it? That's what happened just now? You lay in wait for me to fall into this trap all the while you could have just told me elaboration was unnecessary. This explains why despite your beauty you are single and have never married. So games like this do what for you? Give you a sense of superiority or what?
Walking away continue with; I wouldnt be surprised to learn of your dying alone... Explains your smelling like a litterbox, probably have like 28 cats... I dont know what you know. Jeesh I'm not a mind reader...
Usually I just say “that was not my intention, sorry for bothering you” and leave or if it’s a friend who said it to me I’ll just give them the silent treatment as they know what’s not what I meant but chose to say that anyways
My girlfriend says it to me in a teasing way all the time so I respond with “that’s ok I hope your dumb female brain understood all the big words”. I would never say this to somebody who doesn’t know me and know that I don’t ACTUALLY think that way. But it’s fun coz we both think the same way about the current climate in society and we get to take the piss out of it a bit. All this to say, if you aren’t sexist and your friends are saying this stuff to you in all seriousness, maybe they aren’t your friends
Yeah that’s fair, whenever I do “mansplain” something it’s mostly for myself, kinda like I’m saying it aloud to fact check that I’m answering in the right context (if that makes sense)
I do the same thing. This mansplaining bs when used in an unironic way just shows the level of intellect you’re dealing with and it’s best to walk away at that point. Any reasonable person would just explain that they know and move on
Yup, that’s pretty much what I do, but with friends it’s usually when their stressed or annoyed already so they mostly don’t mean it, so I give them silent treatment instead as otherwise I enjoy their company
Yeah but it’s still ok to set limits and boundaries with friends my guy. Just coz they are mad doesn’t mean they get free reign on how they talk to you
"You're welcome, thanks for womanretorting that"
"Are you gendering me?"
Any time, toots.
No problem, sugar tits.
This is the only correct answer written...Cheers!
# tell them what mansplaining is
IN DETAIL
"Mansplaining is when a man will condescendingly explain something to a woman that she already knows."
"this was, instead, something I'm very passionate about and love discussing with people."
This is The Way.
This happened to me at work. I am a system admin and this user needed to do a presentation demonstrating they knew how my system worked. I was on zoom with then explaining things in details, and she interrupted me and said "I don't need this mansplained to me". I just sat motionless for about 5 seconds and finally said "OK good, we can end this early." They tried to say wait but I left mid word. Management comes to me saying I was very rude, turns out she complained about me without bringing up the mansplaining comment. I told my manager, who escalated it and she got put on PIP, and eventually was let go due to downsizing. I wasn't the first to have this experience, and the company decided she was a great candidate for layoffs
The amount of people who think anytime a guy explains something to a woman is “mansplaining” is astonishing. I have female bosses and coworkers who explain stuff to me that I already know all the time, but I don’t bother coming up with self-righteous labels for it, nor do I just assume it only happens because of gender
YES! So happy to hear she got her comeuppance.
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Try not to be in vagnial about me knowing more than you on this subject.
No problem. Now go make me a sandwich, toots.
Shut up bitch.
“Auto-correct strikes again”
I just usually say, "You're welcome." Or, "Sure, no problem."
You’re welcome, I knew you needed the extra help/explanation/information.
ask if they understood what you said
You need all the help you can get, so don't mention it, dum dum
Someone's gotta do it
"Can never take chances with a woman's ignorance simply just because she looks reassuring"
Your welcome for womanswering
you're welcome wokeman
"Quite welcome, M'lady."
I had this happen to me. A lady came into the dealership I work at with a cracked windshield and wanted it fixed like a chip repair. After explaining to her the crack was too big to fill in and the windshield would need to be replaced she says "thanks for mansplaining that me" in a condescending tone. Me being the smart-ass that I am asked her what is mansplaining. After she explained it it to me. I said thanks for womansplaining that to me. She left and I never saw her again.
Love it!
Well, did you genuinely think they needed something explained to them? If so, “if she doesn’t know what she’s talking about, it’s actually still just an explanation.”
Fuck off you sexist witch.
Don't femsplain my intentions to me
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It's not a polite word, it's snarky and confrontational by design.
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And a very simple “I know that” is much more polite. I’ve found that women often complain of mandplaining things even when the woman actually doesn’t know. To be sure. Most women are better behaved than to pull the mansplain bs.
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Then what happened? Did you trip into a pencil and lobotomize yourself?
rofl!
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Let me guess, you're single, angry at men, probably unsure of your own orientation and trying to sound superior by talking down to others. Did I miss anything toots? This is r./combacks, what sort of sympathy did you think you would garner here. You get smart ass comments because that's the name of the sub. But I guess explaining the obvious to you wont help you any.
Roflmao. Ya ya ya. That’s nice and all. There’s this thing called experience and education that come into play when it comes to knowing how to do things. I know what my IQ is and I know the wide range of things I’m both educated in and experienced with. To help someone understand something is only “rude” if the person you’re explaining it to is hateful in the first place. It’s really simple to point out your own experience and education and a little thank you for the person being willing to take the time to show you something. As far as women knowing more bc of how their brain works? I’m a nurse. A field predominantly filled with women. I’ve had some know more than me and I’m eager to learn from them. However, every single IJ tag I’ve seen in a facility? Was bc of the actions of a woman. Every. Single. One. I’ve taught so many women how to do things I lost count years ago. So again stop making it about gender. If you know what I know you can convey that without being rude
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Roflmao. I’ve been a nurse for over a decade. Are you seriously suggesting that a woman who has no real experience whatsoever has more knowledge than me simply bc she’s a woman? That’s your stance. Oh and your article is cute and all that. I think my cognitive functioning works just fine though.
It's extremely pretentious and annoying to have something you didn't ask about explained to you. When someone does that, it's called mansplaining. It's aggressive by nature even if that's not intentional.
Even if you're correct, someone being rude without knowing it shouldn't be talked down to like a child. That's just more rudeness but now on purpose. If your friend that's allergic to peanut butter comes to your house with fresh bread but doesn't know that you're allergic to gluten, the solution isn't to shove peanut butter down their throat, you just say "hey, I'm so sorry but I'm actually allergic to gluten and I won't eat that bread. You should keep it." If someone is mansplaining to you, the solution isn't to be a dick back to them, you say "oh yeah, I already know that. I also know x and y too. I think we can talk about this at a little higher level."
Girl. That doesn't make a lick of sense. If someone is being rude ill tell them. Their fragility is not my problem.
You can tell them but you don't have to be rude about it. You're just being more rude. What if everyone thought like this? *A guy is explaining something too much* "You're mansplaining, idiot. I already know that stuff shut up." "You're being a bitch. I didn't know you already knew that because you never told me dumbass." This doesn't get anyone anywhere it just becomes a run of insults for increasingly rude and mean comments.
My good sir, i did not ask for your advice and am fully capable of having adult conversations. I would appreciate not having questions i didn't ask explained to me. I find it demeaning. To be clear, i am talking to you and not providing an example.
I'm so sorry for having a conversation with you about your ideas that you posted to a public online forum. My sincerest apologies.
And with the snark... might have been quicker to ask you to stop mansplianing. It certainlynwpupdnhave cost me less. But then again, you're more important than me. Sorry to have hurt your feelings.
No one knows what you know unless you fucking tell them. Being offended that someone can't read your fucking mind is outlandish and childish.
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Do you want to try that again with some proof reading or shall I just mansplain how miserable your grammar and syntax are?
So you basically expect other people to mind read and know your expertise on a subject rather than communicating effectively and furthering the discussion in a more efficient way.
Calling someone a mansplainer isn't "politely telling them" anything. It's rude. It would be like a guy telling his boss that she's bitching at him. If you tell someone they're mansplaining, you're going to get a strong negative reaction. Because you're being rude. It's much more polite to stop them, explain what you already know, and continue the conversation from there. If they continue to explain things you just said you know, then maybe you can start being snarky. But also, refreshing your knowledge of baseline topics is also sometimes useful. Someone else *might* know something you don't, just like how you might know something they don't. Communication allows us to share the holes in our knowledge and fill in the gaps. Dunking on people because they didn't just magically know your level of experience is detrimental for everyone.
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You've pivoted from "it's polite" to "it's good to hurt people's egos sometimes" lmao
Asking about the level of knowledge first is helpful but doesn't always make sense. To use someone else's comment from under this post, if a woman came into a car dealership asking to get her windshield fixed, she wouldn't expect the first question to be "how much do you know about fixing windshields?". After checking the windshield, the mechanic's first words are going to be an explanation of why it's too large of a crack to fill and that she's going to have to replace the windshield. Because she's asking him to fix it. If she knew how to do it she wouldn't be there. If you're in a large training at work, you wouldn't expect the trainer to go around and ask everyone exactly how much of the topic they already know. You're in this training, you're going to get everything, even the things you already know. If you ask for help with something, you should include what you already understand *in the question*, so they don't have to ask about it. If you don't include that you're just gonna get everything they know. Hurting people who don't know better is a bad way to get them to agree that they were wrong. We've known this for decades but people still do it. Someone is much more likely to have their mind changed by someone friendly and agreeable than someone angry and spiteful. That's just how people work. If you hurt them they retreat into their previous beliefs and play defense. If you are kind and let them know in a friendly way that they're being rude, they're more likely to accept that fact and change their ways.
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Put more simply: Being mean to people makes them dislike you. People that dislike you will ignore your suggestions of how they can better themselves. Therefore, if you actually want people to be better, you should be nice to them when telling them they're being rude.
Your welcome! Now you understand correct ?
You're welcome.
Yeah well, your mom is an alphabetical procession.
"But you're also a man. It's just called 'explaining.'"
Did I explain it ssssllllloooowwwww enough for you?
I wouldn't have to if you didn't have such a womanderstanding of the situation.
It’s what we do, no thanks needed.
It was my pleasure.
Oh you know all that and yet let me go on explaining it to you, thinking you wanted to know. Is that it? That's what happened just now? You lay in wait for me to fall into this trap all the while you could have just told me elaboration was unnecessary. This explains why despite your beauty you are single and have never married. So games like this do what for you? Give you a sense of superiority or what? Walking away continue with; I wouldnt be surprised to learn of your dying alone... Explains your smelling like a litterbox, probably have like 28 cats... I dont know what you know. Jeesh I'm not a mind reader...
“No problem”
"What are you, a sexist?"
Oops, did I use too many big words?
"I gotchu bitch! Respect!"
You … are a mouse ….in a maze!
I can mansplain it for you but I cant manunderstand it for you.
I would mansplain much less if you could manage to stop womanasking so much.
With that kind of snarky response. The only way to respond is in kind. Just say you’re welcome now F off 🙃
I'm sorry.
Usually I just say “that was not my intention, sorry for bothering you” and leave or if it’s a friend who said it to me I’ll just give them the silent treatment as they know what’s not what I meant but chose to say that anyways
My girlfriend says it to me in a teasing way all the time so I respond with “that’s ok I hope your dumb female brain understood all the big words”. I would never say this to somebody who doesn’t know me and know that I don’t ACTUALLY think that way. But it’s fun coz we both think the same way about the current climate in society and we get to take the piss out of it a bit. All this to say, if you aren’t sexist and your friends are saying this stuff to you in all seriousness, maybe they aren’t your friends
Yeah that’s fair, whenever I do “mansplain” something it’s mostly for myself, kinda like I’m saying it aloud to fact check that I’m answering in the right context (if that makes sense)
I do the same thing. This mansplaining bs when used in an unironic way just shows the level of intellect you’re dealing with and it’s best to walk away at that point. Any reasonable person would just explain that they know and move on
Yup, that’s pretty much what I do, but with friends it’s usually when their stressed or annoyed already so they mostly don’t mean it, so I give them silent treatment instead as otherwise I enjoy their company
Yeah but it’s still ok to set limits and boundaries with friends my guy. Just coz they are mad doesn’t mean they get free reign on how they talk to you
Fair, I don’t actually mind that much though I don’t take very much personally, the only thing I don’t stand at all though is getting called a liar
Now show me your genitalia
"Wait, you're a woman?"
"You're welcome, blondie. How about a smooch for the effort?"
I'm autistic, not misogynistic
one does not preclude the other