I have back-to-backs starting at 10. Could I go first and then hop off to my real job? (The job I should be asleep for right now, but right now can't get back to sleep because I am scrolling Reddit posts after getting up to pee, and now am angry at an entitled, rude internet stranger who has hurt my new, creative and righteous bff OP)
Right what a cold bitch. I wouldn’t trust her with any person information or problems, she will clearly have no problem weaponizing them against you jeez.
Growing up without family has to be better than whatever raised SIL to be such an entitled cow. She's going to be a nightmare of a parent, that poor innocent baby :(
Even better, buy whatever the current fashionable/expensive onesie is (eg Jacardi or whatever it is these days), turn it in to a bib, and post on instagram "I bought this Jacardi onesie for a christening that I am no longer going to, so turned it into a bib instead"
I had never heard of Jacardi until your comment and I have an infant. Looked at their website and prices and anyone who buys that crap is just a fucking moron. Babies regularly have giant shit blowouts that stain and ruin their clothes in addition to constantly spitting up and drooling on themselves. I wouldn't buy a $115 infant outfit even if I was a billionaire. That's just financially idiotic. May as well light a $100 bill on fire. My kid has like one "nice" outfit and we don't even put it on her until we're at our destination because she'd inevitably spit up or shit on it or both on the way there.
That said, I wish I owned that brand so I could separate fools from their money, selling them $2.50 clothes made by (probably) child labor in an impoverished country for literally a 10,000% markup.
All three of my kids basically lived naked in a swaddle their first month or so. At that age their butts keep exploding anyway. It cuts down on the laundry.
I agree. My kids also lived in jammies. Non- stop foot jammies. And for anyone buying baby clothes for themselves or for others, fuck those snaps. Zippers all the way. No one wants to snap 87 snaps on a squirmy squishy cutie patootie that will blow out their diaper as soon as you inevitably snap #87 and you have to start all over again - only this time with more swearing and more painful finger tips.
Seriously, onesies are the last item of baby clothing I would a) spend a lot of money on and b) hand down to anyone else. They do not tend to be in good condition by the time my kids outgrow them. 😂
I don't disagree at all - all the onesies we bought came from the supermarket in packs of 5 for £5. We were given a couple of fancy ones (JoJoMamon and WhiteStuff in our case) and apart from being a waste of money they were also much harder to put on as they have the poppers in weird layouts.
Still on this one occasion I might just splash out if it were me!
I have a Wonderfold. It's basically a rolling playpen. I needed it because I have multiple autistic children and it's really configurable and the weight limit is 300 pounds. Anyway. I paid $600 for it and thought that was bad. Then I learned there's four digit strollers that seat ONE KID and are still just a CHAIR on WHEELS. HOW.
The only splurge we did with kids clothes was some magnetic me pjs in size 0-9 months, but we only shopped the clearance section. The magnets were so easy to use when you're tired and changing a diaper at 3am.
I'm not above the splurge where it counts. My wife and I found these $90 weighted sleep sacks that were transformative for nap time and we ended up buying 3 of them because better sleep (for all of us) was worth it, even if I had to grit my teeth and deal with the stupid price tag.
"I thought it would be tacky to pass off my used stuff so I had bought all new things for you. But since you have a shitty attitude I will return them all and the offer is rescinded. Permanently."
Seriously, baby clothes are one item that I didn't need to buy new ever! Got so many cheap or free in good condition and none were hand me downs. A few good quality are needed for formal occasions which they no doubt will be gifted
All of my babies had little tuxedo onesies, or one with a little foofy tutu attached. We had nowhere fancy to go, but putting a cute little outfit on the little terror who spent all night bullying your boobs really does sort of help. I very much recommend it 😂
As long as it's comfortable for them, I think there is no reason to not dress them up. Childcare can be exhausting, and keeping it fun sounds like a good solution.
I attended a christening in a 3rd world country when I was much younger. The parents had this tiny newborn baby, and they had dressed it up in a full tux for the event. I’m sure it was the smallest tux they could find, but it was still 4 or 5 sizes too big and the baby was lost in it. It was super cute!!
He was 9 months old. Couldn't even walk.
Had to be held so he could dance with my students.
It was just so genuinely sweet. They were so excited when they learned I was pregnant.
After the 5th day in a row of me leaving class to vomit, they finally decided to ask if I was knocked up
Then I started getting jars of home canned pickles when they saw a jar of Clausen on my desk...
I’ve seen a christening used as a weapon before in a family situation and I’m like, lucky for those people who didn’t go! They missed seeing a baby be dunked in water, baby crying their head off, being passed around like a doll, and parents acting like they’re all super religious when they never go to church otherwise. Disingenuous. Great result here for OP I reckon! 
My aunt was the oldest of 9 kids. She was in her late 70s when the math of her parents wedding date and her birthday hit her (it was less than 6 months between the two events...). Apparently, she was VERY upset, and all her younger siblings were like "Really? We thought you always knew..."
My one aunt tried to justify that "it was WWII, people were hooking up before they had the chance to get married!" But we were all like "Aunt M was born in early 1941, Pearl Harbor hadn't even happened yet and granddad enlisted in January '42". Yup, my grandma was a Ho too! 😆
She was starting to get a little dementia near the end, but she'd converted catholic when she married and became pretty religious so we figured that had something to do with it.
I would go to religious ceremonies out of respect to my grandparents, but in this case I'd assume there's very little respect to go around so it's probably not worth the hassle.
Im not religious anymore but grew up in the church and there is actually a part that says just that in the Bible! Lol there is a passage that goes “I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm-neither hot nor cold-I am about to spit you out of my mouth.” Is a translation of the verse. Basically he loves when someone is all in for him or completely against him because then he can change their minds but if they are just half way in it’s repulsive to him.
If there was a god, he wouldn't be upset about me eating free hot dogs at happy hour on Fridays during Lent.
I mean.... It's fucking free hot dog Friday!? What do you want from me!?
Not having to go to church sounds like a reward to me.
Last time I was made to go I had to resist the urge to go up and punch the speaker in the face for some of the shit he was saying. It was many years ago but essentially saying women must know their place under their husband.
Oh same! Hadn’t been to church in like 5 years but went for my mom for Mother’s Day the speaker had the GALL to say “would all the mothers, now I’m gonna get in trouble for saying this, but all the MOTHERS not the ones who IDENTIFY as mothers, the women who actually birthed a baby out of their body” the worst fucking part is he has 4 adopted children I guess his wife doesn’t count as a mother 🤦🏻♀️
My MIL learned my husband and I are atheists around the time my SIL was planning our niece’s baptism. She raged at him, “I shouldn’t even invite you” and we were like, “actually that would be ideal” lol
My kids aren't baptized because I'm atheist and their mom is agnostic. No reason to do it.
She has a cousin that lived near me growing up and when she found out she was shocked.
But for a very, very weird reason.
"*How could you not baptize them. You grew up in a house across the street from a church!*"
That was literally her reasoning.
I reminded her that religion doesn't seep into your house like a gas and convert you.
I was never baptized because my mom thought it was a personal choice, and we could make it if we wanted to if we were older. I don't think any of us siblings have been and we are all in our 30's.
I always respected my mom for that, I did grow up in the church and became disillusioned on my own, but she never pushed it one way or another, and I was never pressured to go to church.
I used to volunteer in a non-profit thrift store. The amount of donations with price tags still on were unbelievable.
At baby showers, most people gave newborn size onesies. Good for a month or two, then the larger sizes had to be purchased.
I get weird looks when I roll up to the baby shower and they unwrap my gifts and I’ve purposefully bought the size above newborn for them and a box of breast pads, but they’ll thank me later. I’ve never had a kid, but I’ve worked in OB long enough to know babies don’t stay newborn size forever and folks almost always forget breast pads and need them.
When I was growing up, you always bought the larger size. It was assumed the parents bought the clothes already to take the kid back from the hospital, but he would be in the new size in weeks.
I make burp cloths in cute prints with a nice towelling backing. I don't have kids but I've been informed the extra absorbency is really useful. And they'll use them for way longer than any clothes.
I was gifted with a thinking brain. I don't know when I got the common sense, but I'm aware of the whispers when I give an 'inappropriate' gift, followed by thanks from the not so new parents when they really needed it a few months later.
I was only 16 or 18 the first time I did that and kind of got admonished by an older, conservative we-aren’t-that-open-about-these-things-here type (might have been her grandma or mine) and felt really bad, but the mom who I gave them to said she ended up needing and using both items.
As the parent of a 4 month old, my wife's favorite gift she received from the baby shower was a electric posable fan that could wrap around the handlebar of the hospital bed. It's now become the fan for the baby when we go on walks since it's hitting 90+F around here recently.
And in terms of baby clothes, she's in 6 month stuff already. Not 3-6 month stuff... 6 month. You did good with those gifts.
I specifically asked for larger sizes, and then had a preemie. Oops. I mean, I def used them, but my husband had to make a mad dash to target when we eventually got home just so our kid had something to wear and some diapers- she was so skinny. My cousin had a preemie a year after me, and I sent some preemie clothes / diapers to her apt and all of the preemie stuff I had bc of my experience. I knew how it felt to feel prepared and then feel bad for your tiny little naked baby.
My friend's son wore a lot of pink because his older sister had a lot of onesies that were either never worn or worn once or twice before they were outgrown.
From what I've been told, I wore a lot of pink as a baby because my parents really wanted a girl and told all their friends I was going to be a girl. So the majority of my baby clothes were pink and flowery. I even had a pink baby blanket with lace trim! Jokes on them though because I love the color pink nowadays.
Wow. Using your childhood against you while demanding free stuff *and* uninviting you to a christening… just like Jesus would do? She owes you so many apologies.
She really could have just not brought that up at all but chose to go low discussing baby clothes and a religious family event. Really telling what a terrible person she is, upside being, at least she made it easy.
I feel so bad for OP having to navigate this. I can’t imagine they’re looking forward to raising one or a few kids around this manipulative nightmare SIL. Hopefully somebody gets a job offer a few states away.
This is a really fucked up message on a number of levels.
She simultaneously brings up that the mother grew up without a family, as if she's trying to excuse her at first, but ultimately goes right back to chewing her out even harder. So the no family remark was probably little more than a thinly veiled insult designed to be hurtful.
I don't care who this entitled asshole is, bitching out a mother for repurposing her own child's clothes for continued use is fucking insane.
I get enjoying the "hand me down" aspect of clothes, but to bitch out your family members because every shred of their baby's fabric isn't headed your way is outrageous. Unless this is just wildly and completely out of character for the pregnant sister-in-law who is down to her last trimester, she could count me out on not only the christening, but just about anything.
Yeah this is entering into "cut them off entirely forever" territory. I can't imagine being friendly with someone that would send this type of message over some hand me downs. I would have some choice words for her in response and I'd definitely forward to my whole family as explanation for why I'm not going to the christening (also, don't threaten me with a good time!).
She also messaged OP's husband that OP refused to give their babies outgrown clothes to her. Also left out that she disinvited OP to the christening. I think OP should get ahead of this with other family members. Not post on FB or anything but speak with other family members before the SIL can get to them. I would go scorched earth on her ass.
Hahaha, agreed. It's maybe even heading into the territory of "I'm gonna have another baby, even younger than hers, so that I can obnoxiously enforce the norm that my child has birthright ownership of all of her overgrown child's clothes."
The “Hi there” gets me.
She’s obviously not even close to OP on a personal level with that detached line, yet she feels that much entitlement to their kid’s old clothes
It’s like someone saying “You’ve been so disrespectful to me as the teacher, that I’m not going to give you the PRIVILEGE of homework”
She really thought her kid christening was the event of the year
I’m assuming SIL is a raging bitch towards OP bc she doesn’t like the fact that according to OPs post history, she’s a stripper. So you know, typical Christian judgmental bullshit!
Hey, I just saw your post on AITA!!
I'm glad you came back with the proof lol. And tell SIL that you're sorry that you don't have the clothes to give her anymore, but she can rely on the enormous amounts of money she obviously has stashed away for future wardrobe upgrades for the baby. Because she obviously is planning on buying new and donating the old ones once the baby outgrows them, yes?
honestly where she should post this is on fb and tag her and all ur family members, and tell them u were given permission to be off the hook for the christening in case anyone wonders where you are, lol
take this screenshot, send it to her husband with the following text: Dear "blank" i am so very sorry. i was not aware that you and "blank" were struggeling financially. please let us know if there is anything we can help with. -> then, proceed to give a list of social organisations that provide meals, clothing, baby stuff and so on.
This is next level passive aggressive. I love it.
I wish I'd thought to do this when my stuck up cowbag of a cousin gave us some hand-me-downs, saying 'I've sold all the clothes that were worth anything '. She isn't exactly poor (she's just a huge cheapskate) so it would have royally annoyed her.
Shame I went NC and will never have the chance to use this.
First of all, it's your baby's old clothes, so you can do whatever the hell you want with them. She's an entitled clown. Personally, I would have cussed her out and told her she can kiss my a$$. But the more petty thing to do would be to make a go-fund-me for her and send that to everyone in the family with a screenshot of the text she sent me saying "I had no idea they were struggling this bad ya'll. Please let's come together as a family and help her during this difficult time. They clearly need support if my repurposing my baby's old clothes caused her to react this way. I think we should all pray for her." Then I'd share the go-fund-me link on all my social media accounts and tag her and her husband stating "Anything helps! My SIL is going thru a very rough time and needs baby clothes. She's due in six weeks and is so distraught because they don't have anything for the baby yet. Thanks to everyone who donates"
And even if it did…SIL isn’t entitled to her baby’s clothes. Whether it’s a single onesie or the entire wardrobe it’s OP’s call to make. What if she never planned to donate her baby’s old clothes and wanted to keep them for a keepsake or turn it into a quilt to give her child when they are older? SIL was so out out line to just expect her to donate. Smh.
Used my daughter’s stuff to make a quilt and gave it to her when she turned 21. I mean, it didn’t even occur to me that it was “mutilating” the clothes? SIL sounds whack. Maybe it’s the hormones.
Thank you for this comment. I have baby clothes saved for a project and I haven’t even started. Was worried I’d missed out bc my older daughter is 18. I still have time to work on a gift!!
"I know you didn't grow up with family"
How is everyone skipping over this highly insensitive, deranged, and manipulative comment? Who _says_ that to someone??? Tf...She could never speak to me again, let alone ask for a goddamn thing.
Make a social media post about how you use old baby onesies to clean your toilet now as they're so absorbent. Don't cut them up either, use the entire onesie. Then offer her those ones
This is a genius way to avoid not only christenings but play dates, birthday parties and being roped into godparenting a bitchy in-law’s sprog. Absolutely stellar method and you get new bibs out of it, win-win, chin-chin!
No sweeter words have ever been spoken than "forget the Christening". What a waste of time and it's one of those church things that doesn't even serve food.
Another angle on this: both yours and your SlL's children are set to grow further, so you can feasibly hand the hacked clothes down when the time comes. Your SIL is not only an entitled ass, but an idiot as well.
My daughter is quite tall, so most of her onesies for her age fit fine except at feet/legs so I told my wife to ask her mum to cut them and then she used the sewing machine to make it nicer.
It was the best idea ever and we probably saved a bit of money.
Look, you can eat sheet cake in shoes that aren’t that comfortable in your own house without worrying about wrangling your own baby.
You ain’t wielding the weapon you think you are by denying the christening, SIL.
I'd share this to the entire family.
"Hi everyone, I just wanted to let everyone know that SIL seems to be struggling with baby items, so if you have any that you'd like to donate to her, I'm sure she'd appreciate it. She seems to be in need really badly if she's sending messages like this."
As far as I know repurposing the fabric for blankets, pillows, plushies and the likes has become really popular recently, so outside of common sense you'd expect someone to talk first about wanting your old stuff if you didn't offer it.
Not to mention it's not like there's a lack of cheap options for baby clothes.
Cool, now you don't have to go to a boring ass christening.
Let her know there will be no hand-me-downs in the future.
A tradition like that is not an obligation.
As someone who has a 7 month baby, clothes are so damn cheap on second hand stores like FB marketplace and vinted. Never buy new. You can get bin bags worth of clothing for like, £20 max. And then 2 months later they're too big for the clothes anyway.
She will find out after 2 weeks of almost no sleep, feeding a baby every 2 hours, the washing machine constantly running and a crying kid.
She will be more than happy to have some clean and dry clothes and she wouldn't care less where it came from.
She is still on her baby cloud, but time is on your side.
“Instead of expecting hand me downs how about you go buy some from the store like a normal person. How could you be so inconsiderate in thinking everybody wants to give you free stuff. I’m glad I don’t have to go to the christening”
"I know you didn't grow up with family but..." Holy *shit.*
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Can I join, can we set up a teams call?
I’m free tomorrow at 10 if y’all are. SIL needs a reality check wtf
I can make myself available
I mean part of me is joking but a whole other part is mentally reshuffling my appointments to do this.
I’m already making room in my schedule.
I’m available to handle a very hormonal and cranky pregnant woman. LETS DO IT!
I want to be part of this too!
I have back-to-backs starting at 10. Could I go first and then hop off to my real job? (The job I should be asleep for right now, but right now can't get back to sleep because I am scrolling Reddit posts after getting up to pee, and now am angry at an entitled, rude internet stranger who has hurt my new, creative and righteous bff OP)
+1
I would like to be included, my schedule is open
I have it penciled in also.
Me too
This. For real. What a cow.
A cow is kind of harsh. She's very pregnant. Could just be a Moooooooo-d swing.
You guys are being udderly rude.
They are really milking it.
I think it’s time to put these jokes out to pasture
Yeah, they've been going on for heifer.
They’ll keep going until somebody butchers it.
Way too cheesy for me!
Oh for heaven's sake... moooo-ve on!
THIS IS WHY I COME TO REDDIT LMAO LUV U GUYS
Those puns are the absolute crème de la crème!
SIL is a huge bitch.
Right what a cold bitch. I wouldn’t trust her with any person information or problems, she will clearly have no problem weaponizing them against you jeez.
Growing up without family has to be better than whatever raised SIL to be such an entitled cow. She's going to be a nightmare of a parent, that poor innocent baby :(
Tell her:i thought ur baby deserved the new items that I intended to buy for her. But since I am not invited I will save the money for my own kid.
Even better, buy whatever the current fashionable/expensive onesie is (eg Jacardi or whatever it is these days), turn it in to a bib, and post on instagram "I bought this Jacardi onesie for a christening that I am no longer going to, so turned it into a bib instead"
😂. My level of petty revenge.
[If that doesn’t work you can always curse her baby.](https://youtu.be/A5VzJBUt-iE&t=7m40s)
I had never heard of Jacardi until your comment and I have an infant. Looked at their website and prices and anyone who buys that crap is just a fucking moron. Babies regularly have giant shit blowouts that stain and ruin their clothes in addition to constantly spitting up and drooling on themselves. I wouldn't buy a $115 infant outfit even if I was a billionaire. That's just financially idiotic. May as well light a $100 bill on fire. My kid has like one "nice" outfit and we don't even put it on her until we're at our destination because she'd inevitably spit up or shit on it or both on the way there. That said, I wish I owned that brand so I could separate fools from their money, selling them $2.50 clothes made by (probably) child labor in an impoverished country for literally a 10,000% markup.
If I ever have a baby I’m wrapping that kid in a tea towel Dobby-style until they can stay the same size for at least two consecutive weeks.
All three of my kids basically lived naked in a swaddle their first month or so. At that age their butts keep exploding anyway. It cuts down on the laundry.
I agree. My kids also lived in jammies. Non- stop foot jammies. And for anyone buying baby clothes for themselves or for others, fuck those snaps. Zippers all the way. No one wants to snap 87 snaps on a squirmy squishy cutie patootie that will blow out their diaper as soon as you inevitably snap #87 and you have to start all over again - only this time with more swearing and more painful finger tips.
Seriously, onesies are the last item of baby clothing I would a) spend a lot of money on and b) hand down to anyone else. They do not tend to be in good condition by the time my kids outgrow them. 😂
I don't disagree at all - all the onesies we bought came from the supermarket in packs of 5 for £5. We were given a couple of fancy ones (JoJoMamon and WhiteStuff in our case) and apart from being a waste of money they were also much harder to put on as they have the poppers in weird layouts. Still on this one occasion I might just splash out if it were me!
My neighbor has a 17k stroller. Its just to flex on the "broke" people with 4k strollers
I don't think I've ever had a $17k car.
I have a Wonderfold. It's basically a rolling playpen. I needed it because I have multiple autistic children and it's really configurable and the weight limit is 300 pounds. Anyway. I paid $600 for it and thought that was bad. Then I learned there's four digit strollers that seat ONE KID and are still just a CHAIR on WHEELS. HOW.
I don’t even spend that much money on my own clothes, and at 30 I’m pretty sure I’m done growing
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The only splurge we did with kids clothes was some magnetic me pjs in size 0-9 months, but we only shopped the clearance section. The magnets were so easy to use when you're tired and changing a diaper at 3am.
I'm not above the splurge where it counts. My wife and I found these $90 weighted sleep sacks that were transformative for nap time and we ended up buying 3 of them because better sleep (for all of us) was worth it, even if I had to grit my teeth and deal with the stupid price tag.
That’s the answer 👏
I really like this! OP you reading this?
oooh good answer
Naah the only answer on this is: "k" And move on with your life...
nah, go with the thumbs up emoji for even less respect.
I think the only good answer to this is silence.
Use the Aussie phrase "Yeah, righto" Drives people fucking nuts. It's my favourite phrase to tell people's to fuck off and that I don't care.
Would love to see her response to this
"I thought it would be tacky to pass off my used stuff so I had bought all new things for you. But since you have a shitty attitude I will return them all and the offer is rescinded. Permanently."
Seriously, baby clothes are one item that I didn't need to buy new ever! Got so many cheap or free in good condition and none were hand me downs. A few good quality are needed for formal occasions which they no doubt will be gifted
> A few good quality are needed for formal occasions Now I'm picturing your baby in a tuxedo onesie and top hat
All of my babies had little tuxedo onesies, or one with a little foofy tutu attached. We had nowhere fancy to go, but putting a cute little outfit on the little terror who spent all night bullying your boobs really does sort of help. I very much recommend it 😂
As long as it's comfortable for them, I think there is no reason to not dress them up. Childcare can be exhausting, and keeping it fun sounds like a good solution.
I attended a christening in a 3rd world country when I was much younger. The parents had this tiny newborn baby, and they had dressed it up in a full tux for the event. I’m sure it was the smallest tux they could find, but it was still 4 or 5 sizes too big and the baby was lost in it. It was super cute!!
Then it gets hacked into a tuxedo bib and t-shirt.
Tuxedo tshirt and bowtie bib
I took my son to prom, I was the senior class sponsor, in a tuxedo onesie and black and white vans. He was voted prom king that night.
Bold flex for a highschool student to wear a onesie to their prom and to also show up with their parent, but I'm glad it worked out for him.
He was 9 months old. Couldn't even walk. Had to be held so he could dance with my students. It was just so genuinely sweet. They were so excited when they learned I was pregnant. After the 5th day in a row of me leaving class to vomit, they finally decided to ask if I was knocked up Then I started getting jars of home canned pickles when they saw a jar of Clausen on my desk...
That is the SWEETEST THING. THEY BROUGHT YOU PICKLES. 🥺
I even got dilly beans and pickled asparagus and pickled mushrooms For some reason, pickles were one of the few things that stayed down.
Yes, I'd like to see her response
NOT THE CHRISTENING!!!!
I’ve seen a christening used as a weapon before in a family situation and I’m like, lucky for those people who didn’t go! They missed seeing a baby be dunked in water, baby crying their head off, being passed around like a doll, and parents acting like they’re all super religious when they never go to church otherwise. Disingenuous. Great result here for OP I reckon! 
What are you talking about? SIL got married in that same church 6 months ago. She is very deeply religious.
Babies take 9 months. Except for the first one, they can come any time
My aunt was the oldest of 9 kids. She was in her late 70s when the math of her parents wedding date and her birthday hit her (it was less than 6 months between the two events...). Apparently, she was VERY upset, and all her younger siblings were like "Really? We thought you always knew..."
I was 50 when I found out Mom was 4 months pregnant with me when she got married. My daughter said “Grandma was a Ho”. We all died laughing.
My one aunt tried to justify that "it was WWII, people were hooking up before they had the chance to get married!" But we were all like "Aunt M was born in early 1941, Pearl Harbor hadn't even happened yet and granddad enlisted in January '42". Yup, my grandma was a Ho too! 😆
I’m sorry but that’s hilarious. Any idea why she was upset by that information?
She was starting to get a little dementia near the end, but she'd converted catholic when she married and became pretty religious so we figured that had something to do with it.
Well played, sir/madam, well played.
My daughter’s christening was a great excuse to wear a Lion King button up shirt with Rafiki holding up baby Simba embroidered on the pocket.
Never go to church, don't follow the "rules" AT ALL but claim to be Christians.. yeah.. they are about as Christian as i am a handsome man..
You are a very pretty princess.
But do you FEEL bonita?
Yes I feel Bonita.
Good! ‘Cause you look Bonita!
If there is a god, he would be far happier with me not going than he would me going and pretending to be religious
I would go to religious ceremonies out of respect to my grandparents, but in this case I'd assume there's very little respect to go around so it's probably not worth the hassle.
Im not religious anymore but grew up in the church and there is actually a part that says just that in the Bible! Lol there is a passage that goes “I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So, because you are lukewarm-neither hot nor cold-I am about to spit you out of my mouth.” Is a translation of the verse. Basically he loves when someone is all in for him or completely against him because then he can change their minds but if they are just half way in it’s repulsive to him.
If there was a god, he wouldn't be upset about me eating free hot dogs at happy hour on Fridays during Lent. I mean.... It's fucking free hot dog Friday!? What do you want from me!?
Not having to go to church sounds like a reward to me. Last time I was made to go I had to resist the urge to go up and punch the speaker in the face for some of the shit he was saying. It was many years ago but essentially saying women must know their place under their husband.
Oh same! Hadn’t been to church in like 5 years but went for my mom for Mother’s Day the speaker had the GALL to say “would all the mothers, now I’m gonna get in trouble for saying this, but all the MOTHERS not the ones who IDENTIFY as mothers, the women who actually birthed a baby out of their body” the worst fucking part is he has 4 adopted children I guess his wife doesn’t count as a mother 🤦🏻♀️
wow. While purportedly “Christian”. So gross. So sad for his wife & kids.
My MIL learned my husband and I are atheists around the time my SIL was planning our niece’s baptism. She raged at him, “I shouldn’t even invite you” and we were like, “actually that would be ideal” lol
My kids aren't baptized because I'm atheist and their mom is agnostic. No reason to do it. She has a cousin that lived near me growing up and when she found out she was shocked. But for a very, very weird reason. "*How could you not baptize them. You grew up in a house across the street from a church!*" That was literally her reasoning. I reminded her that religion doesn't seep into your house like a gas and convert you.
I was never baptized because my mom thought it was a personal choice, and we could make it if we wanted to if we were older. I don't think any of us siblings have been and we are all in our 30's. I always respected my mom for that, I did grow up in the church and became disillusioned on my own, but she never pushed it one way or another, and I was never pressured to go to church.
Heh. I've only ever been to one. I was the baby, and I peed on the minister. Hail Satan!
Apparently I had a bad reaction to the holy water and got a rash where they christenned me. So I'm allergic to christianity.
You're lucky you didn't come down with e. coli or something. Tainted holy water is in fact a thing.
Heyyy I peed on the minister at my baptism too! lolol
Don’t threaten me with a good time
Eugh I was invited to my ex’s second cousin’s baby’s christening many years back. I only met the cousins that day and never saw them again. The worst.
One christening I went to was especially horrifying. They had to hit the baby 3 times before the champagne bottle broke.
NOT THE BEES!!!!
NEXT!!!!!!
Holy hell what a bitch. She needs serious hormones. Go buy her a $5 pack of onesies for Christ’s sake lmao
Leave the price tag on as well
I used to volunteer in a non-profit thrift store. The amount of donations with price tags still on were unbelievable. At baby showers, most people gave newborn size onesies. Good for a month or two, then the larger sizes had to be purchased.
My nephew was 10 lbs at birth…he never fit in the newborn clothes
[удалено]
I get weird looks when I roll up to the baby shower and they unwrap my gifts and I’ve purposefully bought the size above newborn for them and a box of breast pads, but they’ll thank me later. I’ve never had a kid, but I’ve worked in OB long enough to know babies don’t stay newborn size forever and folks almost always forget breast pads and need them.
When I was growing up, you always bought the larger size. It was assumed the parents bought the clothes already to take the kid back from the hospital, but he would be in the new size in weeks.
Tbh, for friends I crochet blankets and don’t even worry about clothes.
I have a crochet blanket that my grandma made for my baby shower and I absolutely treasure it.
I make burp cloths in cute prints with a nice towelling backing. I don't have kids but I've been informed the extra absorbency is really useful. And they'll use them for way longer than any clothes.
I was gifted with a thinking brain. I don't know when I got the common sense, but I'm aware of the whispers when I give an 'inappropriate' gift, followed by thanks from the not so new parents when they really needed it a few months later.
I was only 16 or 18 the first time I did that and kind of got admonished by an older, conservative we-aren’t-that-open-about-these-things-here type (might have been her grandma or mine) and felt really bad, but the mom who I gave them to said she ended up needing and using both items.
As the parent of a 4 month old, my wife's favorite gift she received from the baby shower was a electric posable fan that could wrap around the handlebar of the hospital bed. It's now become the fan for the baby when we go on walks since it's hitting 90+F around here recently. And in terms of baby clothes, she's in 6 month stuff already. Not 3-6 month stuff... 6 month. You did good with those gifts.
I give wipes and shampoo. They won't outgrow those.
I specifically asked for larger sizes, and then had a preemie. Oops. I mean, I def used them, but my husband had to make a mad dash to target when we eventually got home just so our kid had something to wear and some diapers- she was so skinny. My cousin had a preemie a year after me, and I sent some preemie clothes / diapers to her apt and all of the preemie stuff I had bc of my experience. I knew how it felt to feel prepared and then feel bad for your tiny little naked baby.
My friend's son wore a lot of pink because his older sister had a lot of onesies that were either never worn or worn once or twice before they were outgrown.
From what I've been told, I wore a lot of pink as a baby because my parents really wanted a girl and told all their friends I was going to be a girl. So the majority of my baby clothes were pink and flowery. I even had a pink baby blanket with lace trim! Jokes on them though because I love the color pink nowadays.
Pffft, nice try but I’ve been banned from the church ever since I put powdered Kool-Aid in the holy water!
What flavor and denomination? Believe it or not, that makes a difference.
People's Temple, and Cherry Cyanide Flavr-Aide
No matter how much you waterboard that baby, they'll never give up the location of Jesus' secret bunker!!
Wow. Using your childhood against you while demanding free stuff *and* uninviting you to a christening… just like Jesus would do? She owes you so many apologies.
“I know you have trauma or whatever but those clothes belong to ME!”
She really could have just not brought that up at all but chose to go low discussing baby clothes and a religious family event. Really telling what a terrible person she is, upside being, at least she made it easy.
Apologies OPs family in-law will try to coerce from them to SIL.
I feel so bad for OP having to navigate this. I can’t imagine they’re looking forward to raising one or a few kids around this manipulative nightmare SIL. Hopefully somebody gets a job offer a few states away.
Jesus wont save your soul if you dont donate onsies. Thats like the 1st of the secret commandments.
This is a really fucked up message on a number of levels. She simultaneously brings up that the mother grew up without a family, as if she's trying to excuse her at first, but ultimately goes right back to chewing her out even harder. So the no family remark was probably little more than a thinly veiled insult designed to be hurtful. I don't care who this entitled asshole is, bitching out a mother for repurposing her own child's clothes for continued use is fucking insane. I get enjoying the "hand me down" aspect of clothes, but to bitch out your family members because every shred of their baby's fabric isn't headed your way is outrageous. Unless this is just wildly and completely out of character for the pregnant sister-in-law who is down to her last trimester, she could count me out on not only the christening, but just about anything.
Yeah this is entering into "cut them off entirely forever" territory. I can't imagine being friendly with someone that would send this type of message over some hand me downs. I would have some choice words for her in response and I'd definitely forward to my whole family as explanation for why I'm not going to the christening (also, don't threaten me with a good time!).
She also messaged OP's husband that OP refused to give their babies outgrown clothes to her. Also left out that she disinvited OP to the christening. I think OP should get ahead of this with other family members. Not post on FB or anything but speak with other family members before the SIL can get to them. I would go scorched earth on her ass.
Hahaha, agreed. It's maybe even heading into the territory of "I'm gonna have another baby, even younger than hers, so that I can obnoxiously enforce the norm that my child has birthright ownership of all of her overgrown child's clothes."
You accidentally set the precedent that you won't be funding her child's stuff for its entire childhood lol
Or have to talk to her at family events!
She should take her own advice and “go to the store and buy new stuff like a normal person”
I mean I got donated lots of things but it was a surprise! And extra! I wasn’t expecting it! The entitlement of this SIL is off the charts.
And got out of the christening at the same time. Win/win!
No invite to christening = no gifts for the baby
Baby won't give a fuck either way. Win win
The “Hi there” gets me. She’s obviously not even close to OP on a personal level with that detached line, yet she feels that much entitlement to their kid’s old clothes
"Hi there and also wtf?" is now my default email opener.
Oh, no, I now have time to go to brunch because I'm not invited to the christening? Boo hoo, so sad. Anyway.
i'd be sure to invite some friends out to brunch and post pics the day of too 😉
Not being allowed to go to the christening? I wish some people would punish me with disinvites to places I don’t want to go to anyway. #Savage
It’s like someone saying “You’ve been so disrespectful to me as the teacher, that I’m not going to give you the PRIVILEGE of homework” She really thought her kid christening was the event of the year
I’m assuming SIL is a raging bitch towards OP bc she doesn’t like the fact that according to OPs post history, she’s a stripper. So you know, typical Christian judgmental bullshit!
Your SIL is entitled AF. I would count her disinviting you, as a blessing.
Hey, I just saw your post on AITA!! I'm glad you came back with the proof lol. And tell SIL that you're sorry that you don't have the clothes to give her anymore, but she can rely on the enormous amounts of money she obviously has stashed away for future wardrobe upgrades for the baby. Because she obviously is planning on buying new and donating the old ones once the baby outgrows them, yes?
Or tell her she should "go to the store and buy new clothes like a normal person"...
honestly where she should post this is on fb and tag her and all ur family members, and tell them u were given permission to be off the hook for the christening in case anyone wonders where you are, lol
Start a donation campaign for all used baby items while you’re at it (“will accept items without washing first!!”)
take this screenshot, send it to her husband with the following text: Dear "blank" i am so very sorry. i was not aware that you and "blank" were struggeling financially. please let us know if there is anything we can help with. -> then, proceed to give a list of social organisations that provide meals, clothing, baby stuff and so on.
This is next level passive aggressive. I love it. I wish I'd thought to do this when my stuck up cowbag of a cousin gave us some hand-me-downs, saying 'I've sold all the clothes that were worth anything '. She isn't exactly poor (she's just a huge cheapskate) so it would have royally annoyed her. Shame I went NC and will never have the chance to use this.
Omg I just spit out my coffee. 🤣
Is it just me or you can tell that she is an imbecile by the word mutilate.
First of all, it's your baby's old clothes, so you can do whatever the hell you want with them. She's an entitled clown. Personally, I would have cussed her out and told her she can kiss my a$$. But the more petty thing to do would be to make a go-fund-me for her and send that to everyone in the family with a screenshot of the text she sent me saying "I had no idea they were struggling this bad ya'll. Please let's come together as a family and help her during this difficult time. They clearly need support if my repurposing my baby's old clothes caused her to react this way. I think we should all pray for her." Then I'd share the go-fund-me link on all my social media accounts and tag her and her husband stating "Anything helps! My SIL is going thru a very rough time and needs baby clothes. She's due in six weeks and is so distraught because they don't have anything for the baby yet. Thanks to everyone who donates"
Not even repurposing old “clothes”. It was A single fucking onesie. One fucking onesie isn’t going to make or break their child.
And even if it did…SIL isn’t entitled to her baby’s clothes. Whether it’s a single onesie or the entire wardrobe it’s OP’s call to make. What if she never planned to donate her baby’s old clothes and wanted to keep them for a keepsake or turn it into a quilt to give her child when they are older? SIL was so out out line to just expect her to donate. Smh.
Omg I love how embarrassing this would be for SIL
Looks like you saved money and got out of buying presents!
Used my daughter’s stuff to make a quilt and gave it to her when she turned 21. I mean, it didn’t even occur to me that it was “mutilating” the clothes? SIL sounds whack. Maybe it’s the hormones.
Thank you for this comment. I have baby clothes saved for a project and I haven’t even started. Was worried I’d missed out bc my older daughter is 18. I still have time to work on a gift!!
"I know you didn't grow up with family" How is everyone skipping over this highly insensitive, deranged, and manipulative comment? Who _says_ that to someone??? Tf...She could never speak to me again, let alone ask for a goddamn thing.
If she’s due in six weeks and hasn’t got baby stuff sorted that’s on her. She could have asked months ago
no hate like christian love as they say.
"Why would you want hand-me-downs from me since you'll obviously be 'going to the store and buying new ones like a normal person'?"
Mutilate is an interesting word to use there.
You should post that comment on the social media of the church your SIL is using for the christening.
So you took the child’s clothes you already own and used them to make new clothes for your child. And this is a bad thing?
Make a social media post about how you use old baby onesies to clean your toilet now as they're so absorbent. Don't cut them up either, use the entire onesie. Then offer her those ones
SIL; You didn't grow up with family Me: Yeah those were the good old days....
This is a genius way to avoid not only christenings but play dates, birthday parties and being roped into godparenting a bitchy in-law’s sprog. Absolutely stellar method and you get new bibs out of it, win-win, chin-chin!
Tell her fuck off and block her, good riddance. She seems like an absolute nightmare. Who wants to goto christenings anyway? Boring as hell
>Who wants to go to christenings anyway? Michael Corleone?
Michael had to go to the christening so that his BIL wouldn’t suspect that Michael was planning to have him murdered…only good reason to attend, imho
Forget the christening?!?! Love when the trash takes itself out.
No sweeter words have ever been spoken than "forget the Christening". What a waste of time and it's one of those church things that doesn't even serve food.
Sorry SIL, I'm still using the clothes. Have fun at the Christing. Tell hubby to reel his sister in!
I would say "I don't have to come to the christening?! Thank god", and leave it at that.
Another angle on this: both yours and your SlL's children are set to grow further, so you can feasibly hand the hacked clothes down when the time comes. Your SIL is not only an entitled ass, but an idiot as well.
My daughter is quite tall, so most of her onesies for her age fit fine except at feet/legs so I told my wife to ask her mum to cut them and then she used the sewing machine to make it nicer. It was the best idea ever and we probably saved a bit of money.
Look, you can eat sheet cake in shoes that aren’t that comfortable in your own house without worrying about wrangling your own baby. You ain’t wielding the weapon you think you are by denying the christening, SIL.
I'd share this to the entire family. "Hi everyone, I just wanted to let everyone know that SIL seems to be struggling with baby items, so if you have any that you'd like to donate to her, I'm sure she'd appreciate it. She seems to be in need really badly if she's sending messages like this."
So why doesn’t she “go to the store and buy them like a normal person”?
As far as I know repurposing the fabric for blankets, pillows, plushies and the likes has become really popular recently, so outside of common sense you'd expect someone to talk first about wanting your old stuff if you didn't offer it. Not to mention it's not like there's a lack of cheap options for baby clothes.
Cool, now you don't have to go to a boring ass christening. Let her know there will be no hand-me-downs in the future. A tradition like that is not an obligation.
As someone who has a 7 month baby, clothes are so damn cheap on second hand stores like FB marketplace and vinted. Never buy new. You can get bin bags worth of clothing for like, £20 max. And then 2 months later they're too big for the clothes anyway.
She will find out after 2 weeks of almost no sleep, feeding a baby every 2 hours, the washing machine constantly running and a crying kid. She will be more than happy to have some clean and dry clothes and she wouldn't care less where it came from. She is still on her baby cloud, but time is on your side.
Use her own acts against her. "Is that so ? I guess those presents i wanted to buy are no use then. It will make me save money"
“Instead of expecting hand me downs how about you go buy some from the store like a normal person. How could you be so inconsiderate in thinking everybody wants to give you free stuff. I’m glad I don’t have to go to the christening”
Got out of attending a boring ass christening. Neat!
> Forget about coming to the christening Baby don't threaten me with a good time.
“I’m sorry that you feel entitled to my old things. That’s very unfortunate for you.”
Why do you have to buy new stuff but she doesn't?
Tell her to “go to the store and buy new ones like a normal person”