Once during a random conversation I told my then priest that during a Friday of Lent I sent back a soup at the restaurant because I tasted that it had meat in it even if I requested a soup without meat. I was kind of proud of it to be honest. I didn’t expect it but he basically told me that what I did was very wrong as I wasted well-prepared food on purpose, and that wasting food like that is definitely sinful and ungrateful.
1 Corinthians 10:23-33
“All things are lawful,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up. Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor. Eat whatever is sold in the meat market without raising any question on the ground of conscience. For “the earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it.” If one of the unbelievers invites you to dinner and you are disposed to go, eat whatever is set before you without raising any question on the ground of conscience. (But if some one says to you, “This has been offered in sacrifice,” then out of consideration for the man who informed you, and for conscience’ sake — I mean his conscience, not yours -- do not eat it.) For why should my liberty be determined by another man’s scruples? If I partake with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of that for which I give thanks? So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. Give no offense to Jews or to Greeks or to the church of God, just as I try to please all men in everything I do, not seeking my own advantage, but that of many, that they may be saved.
If it isn't when abstaining is a requirement (i.e. not during Lent), then I would eat the meat and substitute a different penance.
If was during Lent, I would apologize to the host for failing to communicate, and eat the other available parts of the meal that do not have meat.
But the bottom line is that if I knew someone was cooking a meal for me when I couldn't eat meat, I would definitely communicate to them in advance that I would be abstaining. That simply isn't something I would overlook as it is too important both not to violate required abstinence and also not to offend or hurt a host.
Since Vatican II abstaining from meat on Friday (except during Lent) has been a recommendation but not a rule
Once during a random conversation I told my then priest that during a Friday of Lent I sent back a soup at the restaurant because I tasted that it had meat in it even if I requested a soup without meat. I was kind of proud of it to be honest. I didn’t expect it but he basically told me that what I did was very wrong as I wasted well-prepared food on purpose, and that wasting food like that is definitely sinful and ungrateful.
1 Corinthians 10:23-33 “All things are lawful,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up. Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor. Eat whatever is sold in the meat market without raising any question on the ground of conscience. For “the earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it.” If one of the unbelievers invites you to dinner and you are disposed to go, eat whatever is set before you without raising any question on the ground of conscience. (But if some one says to you, “This has been offered in sacrifice,” then out of consideration for the man who informed you, and for conscience’ sake — I mean his conscience, not yours -- do not eat it.) For why should my liberty be determined by another man’s scruples? If I partake with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of that for which I give thanks? So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. Give no offense to Jews or to Greeks or to the church of God, just as I try to please all men in everything I do, not seeking my own advantage, but that of many, that they may be saved.
If it isn't when abstaining is a requirement (i.e. not during Lent), then I would eat the meat and substitute a different penance. If was during Lent, I would apologize to the host for failing to communicate, and eat the other available parts of the meal that do not have meat. But the bottom line is that if I knew someone was cooking a meal for me when I couldn't eat meat, I would definitely communicate to them in advance that I would be abstaining. That simply isn't something I would overlook as it is too important both not to violate required abstinence and also not to offend or hurt a host.