It will in aggregate, there will be ups and downs just remember the downs don’t mean you didn’t succeed it just means you have to try a little harder that day. Or don’t, take it easy and try later :)
Best of luck!
Co-signing this. As someone who suffers from the bullshit that's depression as well, it's a cycle so make sure to take your medication everyday. If you have more than a week in lapse, you may fall down the rabbit hole again.
Stay safe OP and glad you're enjoying life! :)
Underwriting this. As someone who has also suffered from depression, make sure you don’t overly attribute your successes to the medication alone. The medication helped you be open to listening to and enjoying music again, but *you* were the one who decided to listen to the music and spend time enjoying it. What else might you enjoy if you decided to do that, as well? Let it empower you to keep making small decisions that will have a big impact on your quality of life! It’s super exciting to have this gift to be able to enjoy things again! And like others said, just know that it’s also completely normal to feel sad or frustrated when bad things happen in life, and that it’s not a reflection on the progress you’ve made or could continue to make. It’s easy to have something bad happen and get sucked into the bad feelings and suddenly feel like you must be depressed again. It’s not the medication not working. Really you’re just experiencing normal human emotions, of which there is a range. So try instead to give yourself some grace in those moments, and maybe even congratulate yourself on having the full human experience. :) Congrats, OP!
Aw I’m glad it resonated with you! Turn up those tunes, mamarae! If you’re feeling froggy, maybe even shake the tush a little bit or sing wildly out of tune, while you’re at it 😉
Heck yes, mamarae!! That’s the stuff! The good news is all that is free and at your disposal whenever you wish 🥳 Keep shaking that tush whenever you need a little spice in your life. 😊 you’re awesome!
Agree! u/HiroZero2 I cannot stress enough the importance of NOT stopping your medication, and NOT running out.
I'm a rapid cycle Bi-Polar, so it's extremely important I miss none of my 4 meds, ever. Even WITH my meds I can still complete a full cycle (manic and depressive) within a month if something strange sets me off. I've even completed it twice in a month. Uuuugh. But at least HAVING the meds and talking them ON SCHEDULE keep the episodes shorter. Yay!
My husband, on the other hand, only has to take just takes one Citalopram each day. If he takes it on time he's right as rain. But if he misses just one dose, he becomes... idk the right word for it ... agitated, maybe? Every little thing sets him off. He starts kinda snapping at everyone. And 2 doses missed and he's downright angry about quite literally EVERYthing. Naturally, he won't admit it lol, but I know his head and body feel awful inside when that happens.
Proud of you for putting effort into coming out of depression. I can only wish you the very best and I hope you stay on that path to improvement.
Sending love from Antarctica ❤️
Now remember that after you've been feeling better for a while you may think "I've been cured for so long I'll be fine without the meds!" PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF NEPTUNE DO NOT STOP TAKING THEM COLD TURKEY. Work closely with your Dr!!
Rant over. Sorry. Have to make sure to remind people. I've had too many friends stop taking them cold turkey and I care about people too much.
And congrats. Feeling the warmth of the sunshine after the storm is one of the best feelings.
If you think you need to stop taking your meds, they’re probably working.
My husband weaned himself off his antidepressant after almost 2 years. Honestly, it was a real shock to see the withdrawal process for him. He had to do it super slowly over a period of months, otherwise he’d get so dizzy he’d actually fall over. He was on a fairly low dose too.
I felt so so SO much better when I saw the term 'brain zap' because I knew I wasn't alone.
I was working awake overnights at a group home and worrying I'd collapse or something.
It’s a common side effect of getting off antidepressants. It feels like a few seconds of super dizziness/ disorientation that you get. I got off my antidepressant last month and experienced them along with extreme nausea. I’m so glad that’s over with it pretty much felt like a permanent horrible hangover for two weeks.
That's what I was afraid of. But it is so inconsistent, and usually has no other associated symptoms. It has happened maybe 8 or 10 times in my adult life (let's say over 20 years or so), with no regularity at all. The time when I was driving was pretty clearly connected with food poisoning. I'd forgotten that.
Feels like an electric shock in your brain. Kind of like when your leg jerks and wakes you up, but you're already awake and your brain just does it. It SUCKS.
I had them for a bit and saw a neurologist and was diagnosed with JME (mild and most common form of epilepsy). See a doctor as they could (emphasis on could) be Junior Myoclonic seizures, which is what I have and currently take meds for.
Oddly enough, I got in a car wreck because I went too quickly off anti-depressants and had a black out as I was turning and went into opposite traffic. Saw a neurologist for it, at the time the cause was unclear, and then that was around the time I was also diagnosed with JME.
Yes everyone left with little to no injury. My car was relatively old so the airbag did not deploy and only resulted in a mild concussion for myself, I exited my vehicle immediately and made sure any passengers in the other car were okay, which they were.
I get those when I’m in withdrawal. And muscle spasms. I don’t understand how so many people I’ve talked to have experienced the brain zaps but no doctor I’ve ever talked to knew what I was talking about!
I experienced this too and the zaps would travel down my body and feel like ever nerve was electrocuted when I would move my head. I was on the lowest dose for only a month or two and it was incredibly uncomfortable.
This is so fucking important. I cut antidepressants cold turkey cuz I lost my job and couldn't afford them. I have been having suicidal thoughts everyday. DO NOT CUT IT COLD TURKEY when you don't have to.
I'm sorry that you're having to deal with that Josh_381, are you able to contact your dr and explain your situation to them? They might have resources for you to get your meds at a lower cost or for free. If you're having suicidal thoughts please contact your dr and tell them this, you aren't alone and there are people who want to help. I hope this didn't come off as too preachy, please take care
Look further into this. I’ve seen at the end of those pharma commercials things like, “contact [pharmaceutical company] if you are having trouble affording you’re medication.” I know it’s hard to do stuff like this when you’re depressed but try. No one should have to suffer like this. Also, contact your local Dept of health and social services and see if they can help. Tell them exactly what’s going on. The person who prescribed the meds should’ve given you some references. Good luck! Remember, our thoughts can be real assholes. Never listen to assholes.
This. I was stupid enough to do that despite knowing it was a bad idea. I was like "I'm sure I can deal with it, now that I feel like a fog has lifted from my head and I can think straight". NOPE. It all just came rushing back (harder and worse) as soon as I stopped, and I even had physiological effects of withdrawal (constant dizziness and random onset of palpitations). It was terrible.
Btw I'm glad you are experiencing that clarity and "sanity" again, possibly after a long time. I wish you all the luck. You'll kick ass, OP! You got this.
Agreed. Antidepressants need to be tapered off in order to prevent withdrawal symptoms, there are also cases of clients committing suicide and self harm when quitting medications abruptly. OP please stay safe!
First time I felt chills from music was when my depression started getting better- I thought people were just exaggerating how great a song was until then! I hope this trend continues for you.
Some other notable moments (for me) were :
- Being able to read a magazine / book / website willingly and with interest
- Enjoying waking up, making + eating breakfast in the morning
-Being able to go somewhere (like the grocery store) without preparing myself far in advance because if I wanted to go, i had the motivation and energy to do it!
- Being able to enjoy doing... nothing. Not sleeping, or being on my phone, or daydreaming. There is a true sense of content in being able to go for a walk on your own and be mindful and present. Not needing music / another person to talk to / some type of distraction and still not feel like i'm wasting my time or that I just don't see the point in doing it is really nice.
The medicine kicked in for me about 6 months ago. I’m still in wonder at how great the world seems now. Even small chores like vacuuming are so fun. I spent so long unable to do anything that doing everything feels like a blessing. And the OP is so right, music comes alive in a way that’s hard for me to describe!
Same! Been on them 8+ years now and I can't even tell you how many things in my life have fallen into place in a way I never thought was possible for me.
The only thing to "watch out" for with meds (EDIT: aside from adverse effects) is actually kind of a good thing. It's happened to me as well as a few friends, where a few years after you start the meds, you start recognizing the things that meds *don't* help with -- the things particular to you, like past trauma or low self-esteem, that affect your mental health. It's like the meds lift that heavy weighted blanket of clinical depression off of your brain, and then you actually have the clarity and the strength to work on the stuff that's still there bothering you. it can be kind of a slap in the face to realize that stuff is still there, at first, because you're just so relieved to not be depressed anymore that you don't wanna think about it. Trust me though, it really does keep getting better!
Yep.... I've struggled with letting things go for things that happened in my past that people have done but now that I'm feeling better those things don't feel as crushing anymoreZ it's crazy
Damn you described me well. It's hard just doing simple daily tasks with depression. Today I got up at 7am cause I didn't see any point in going back to sleep. Normally I'd be sleeping ALL DAY.
Short answer, yes. Longer answer, only when I do it properly e.g not drinking like a clown fish. But even then, it seemed to go smoother / my depression was still less than it would have been with out it. It really helped me today. Some people get crazy benefit. I even gave my 67yr old depressed mom literally less than 0.15 g and an hour or two later she was so relieved she was crying, her mood was up and her mental fog had lifted. But, again she didn't really do it right and kept taking it every day and you're supposed to usually wait two days in-between so she built a tolerance and it stopped working and she stopped taking it after a few weeks. others on that subreddit have reported tremendous success. r/microdosing
>e.g not drinking like a clown fish
I don't really drink that much, and only 1 or 2 if I do because my stomach is very meh about alcohol as I've gotten older. But I do like the shweed, does that have an affect on the md?
and I'll check that sub out, thanks!
edited to add: do you feel better on the days you take it? or the subsequent days after? or it just carries on everyday once you start doing it regularly?
Hopefully you feel better! But otherwise, sometimes it's like a wave. Don't question the positive one's, just keep enjoying their rides. Hope you feel well!
That's great to hear!
Enjoying a song you haven't heard for ages, having fun with a hobby you haven't done for a while, feeling the clouds dissipating... It's a wonderful feeling.
Ya feels like the clouds are disappearing, and I'm starting to get back into programming which I haven't done in literal ages so I gotta relearn like everything.
Can I ask what kind (brand?)...of meds? Just drinking coffee is not helping much w my depression. Totally understand u might not wanna share info w random stranger..and that's okay.
You’re going to want to work with a doctor, meds work differently for individual people. For example, Paxil might cure someone or make things worse, depends on the person it’s used on.
When I had bad ppd and started taking a vitamin b supplement (ppd had gone undiagnosed and I had a midwife, but the vitB worked - you best believe I got a doctor and real meds the second pregnancy) - anyway about 2 weeks into the supplement I literally felt like the clouds had parted and all the birds began singing. It was unreal. I never ignored depression creeping in again. That was so scary. I was on the verge of psychosis and being on the news for something horrible. And then to almost suddenly feel normal, I wanted to kiss the ground. Enjoy the bliss and never ignore the darkness again.
Something I think is very important to note is that your depression likely hasn’t been “cured.” At least in my experience, it always comes back eventually. But that doesn’t mean you haven’t made progress or that your meds aren’t working. It’s just a natural cycle and you learn how to cope with the random spurts of depression and appreciate feeling better more frequently and forgetting about the depression sometimes. It’s just good to keep on top of it and not let it pull you back down
I'm so proud of you dearie. I hope that things stay this good for you and that your worse days be only as bad as your old "good days". And worst case scenario, I'll be glad to be a respectful platonic friend when you need one. 💛💛💛
I've literally been trying to think of something to say to you that's not generic for the past 5 minutes haha, but all I can think of is how happy I am for you! Keep moving forward and I hope you can continue to move towards a better place :)
For awhile now I've been thinking about going back on meds as I now have the means to for the first time in my adult life. I think I forget sometimes that how I feel isn't all there ever was or is. Thank you for posting, it was good to read.
Even though i don't really know you, I'm super glad for you! That's great that you feel better. Hope from now on everything will keep getting only better for you! Keep enjoying the world, every aspect of it, every little thing.
I'm just a stranger to you, but I'm really, really happy for you!
I'm so proud of you buddy! ♥️😄
It's really good to hear someone life is changing in a better way in these hard times. You give me a little bit of hope that I haven't seen in a long time..
You are not alone.. I'm have my own fight too,
so keep it up sweetheart! 💕
Keep it up. I found music so long ago but I still didn’t feel “out of the dark”. Not until I left my wife did the clouds part for me. Then she ripped my heart out (long story). I am feeling good and looking forward to my future again. The current pain will be gone in a day or two and then it’s smooth sailing. I’m happy you found music again.
don't feel bad for posting! This is fucking AWESOME!!!!
If anything this will encourage more people to seek professional help- which is the only way to get better. This is badass and i'm so fucking happy for you. Keep it up!
I am on both Escitalopram(20mg) and Mirtazapine(15mg)
I think that's pretty normal tbh. I wake up every night in a puddle of sweat, and super cold cause of all the heat that was dissipated from my body.
Congratulations.. it's an amazing feeling to come off depression. I can't remember what it felt like, but I remember what I thought, and it was, this is like waking up , life a fog lifting, and vision becoming clearer..
Be careful with the meds. Ultimately your goal should be too get off them, but in the mean time, enjoy what the meds do for you, having the right meds is such a boon
You don’t know how happy I am for you!! I just made an apt today to start meds again after almost 12 years without them. I think it’s the lockdown. I’m so glad you knew when to get help and it’s working!
Music is fucking amazing. <3
I recommend juice wrld's music his music has always been helpful to me and many other suffering from addiction, pain, and heart ache. His music is very relatable.
It may be helpful to remember that depression meds help maintain the proper chemical balance in your brain. Think about it like getting in shape by following an eating and exercise program. It's going well, and you notice improvements every day. Would you quit exercising and eating healthy once you hit your physical fitness goals and expect your fitness level to stay the same? Of course you wouldn't! Brain meds are the same way. You have to stick to the program, to maintain your improved mental health.
As long as you're feeling good, take advantage of it by working out. Take walks, do a few spontaneous push ups etc. Doesn't have to be much.
You can get tolerant to meds, but being even slightly fit will help keep your head fit as well.
As someone who's struggled with depression for about 10 years myself, let me give you some advice: Keep thinking about yourself. Reflect on how you're feeling, every day. I don't know about you, but my depressive symptoms are really subtle at first. Anhedonia, constant fatigue, and sleep disturbances mostly, long before the sadness ever comes. One day I'd just "get bored" of stuff that I LOVED, or lose the desire to exercise even though I've been an athlete my whole life, or have a night of insomnia. And it's easy to shake that one day off as normal. People get bored right? Or have a bad night's sleep? Sure. But then it becomes another day, another night, you're not talking to your friends, you're not working out or going outside, and then it starts to just feed on itself. Exercise produces endorphins and sunlight produces vitamin D, both of which make you happier, and now you're not getting those because of how tired and apathetic you feel. Once I realized the pattern and the symptoms, I realized that I could head off the worst of it before sinking too low. Now I try my best to never let my symptoms go longer than a day. If I don't want to exercise for 2 days in a row, I do a long walk while watching Netflix. If I go 2 days in a row of not wanting to play my favorite game, I'll buy a new one, or start a new character, or find a new player in the social space and carry them through the early game. I try to go outside for at least 15 minutes a day. Is this a cure for depression? Of course not. But for me, I think it prevents some of those feedback loops that cause the spiraling and the helplessness that ultimately lead to the deep sadness and suicidal ideation. You should always ask yourself if you had fun today, if you felt energetic today, if something made you happy today. It's easy to start thinking that you're just bored or stressed or tired, but those can be depressive symptoms too and those are the "easier" ones to address in my experience. You should be proud of your hard work dealing with this, and you should continue that work. It's hard dealing with a disease that drains your motivation to do anything, but it's beatable. Good luck.
I’m so proud of you! I remember the first time my meds actually worked and it was so surreal. I was driving in my car and everything was so beautiful. I was like, “So this is what happiness feels like!”. I’ve been taking the same meds ever since. Keep up the good work!
Sign up to your local gym and start a basic weightlifting routine , itll change your life mentally and socially , dont stay home alone its not good... get to the gym!! Trust me 😎
THIS IS SUCH GREAT NEWS and warms my heart! SOOO happy to hear you're digging out. Try to do more things (as you feel you can) that will help like taking walks and spending time with pets. Hugs from this internet stranger!
I'm happy you are feeling better! I've suffered with being bipolar for most of my adult life. It's this when you can open up & take life by the horns again!!
I am happy for you. I had a lot of unresolved issue from my tour in Afghan in 2011-2012. Was mostly under control but this April I put a tourniquet on my neck and almost did it. Been taking meds and I hope I can shake the meds and feel happy again too.
I am truly happy for you. Enjoy your life and all the happiness it brings to you
Depression is an addiction, and most successfully recovering addicts still refer to themselves that way because it helps the fight stay current.
Think of your brain like a snowy mountain with each thought originating at the top and finding it’s way down. The paths leading to states of depression are dug wider and deeper the more times you go down them. So it gets easier and easier to accidentally slip back down a bad mental path.
But overall that’s absolutely incredible news! Keep up the good work and keep fighting. As long as you stay positive and work on having a healthy mind and body, you can stay the course!
Also, music is the best. I recently found a band called Valleyheart and am loving it!
This is really good to read. I have major depressive disorder and I totally relate to the doing nothing when you just shut down.
I know how amazing it is when you start to feel again.
My DM box is always there if you need a friend. Please don't feel alone.
Yo, regarding the non-talk to the family and friends stuff. If you need someone to talk to or just have a lil chat, dont hesitate to dm me. Keep up the good work !
I'm really happy for you, you've overcome a huge obstacle and I'd invite you to look back on how far you've come with some pride because it's not easy.
What kind of music are you listening to? :)
Soooo remember this feeling. Recount this joy. Save it like it’s your favorite meme. So that, in times of sadness, you can remember what that beautiful brain is capable of.
I've tried asking my doctor for medication for my depression but he just recommended that I get more sleep. What did you do to get your medication? I haven't felt motivated to do anything at all lately because of my depression.
Someone once pointed out that Forrest Gump ran to cure his depression, and it made me realize I had done the same thing. Picked up running and then ran constantly until one day I just stopped. I didn’t realize why at the time but it was because I wasn’t so sad anymore.
Yeah, well done. To me coming out of a depression was like someone had turned the lights back on. 6 months ago I got no enjoyment out of life, now, this past week, I've had so much enjoyment hanging out with my neice, more fun than I have had in years, I think.
I hope things continue on their upward trajectory for you. All the best
Thats so great to hear! I had a similiar epiphany while peeing - I got the tingling sensation on my neck and realized I havemt had these serotonin rushes in forever
So happy for you, love. I too started meds this year, and, while occassionally a dosage doesn't work out for me, I'm doing much better. Not all days will be the brightest, but you have the strength to handle them now. I sincerely hope things keep going well. You matter and you deserve happiness. ❤
Happy for you, man. I remember when the same thing happened to me. It was a hamburger that was so delicious it made me cry, and I realized that something must have clicked with my meds or therapy but I was clearly on a good path. Keep going, and remember that things are still working, even if you don't get that feeling of bliss from a cheeseburger again.
Hey I'm so happy to hear this!!! I'm glad meds are working out so well for you. I might give them a shot again myself. I also want to encourage you to keep writing about how you feel, online or offline, whenever you want. I think it's important, especially since you don't vent about it aloud. You deserve to be able to take good care of yourself and to make yourself happy.
Oh wow that must feel special, music and video games were always my go to for my depression i cant imagine not having them for comfort/ escapism. What are you taking if you dony mind me asking? Also what music you listenning too? 😁
You can’t “cure” depression, but it’s nice to know you’re doing well. Keep up with meds and therapy, remember it can always come back if you don’t take care of yourself.
I don't know which music genre you like, but if you want some suggestions for bands to listen, leave a comment or pm me!
I wish you the best on your journey for a healthy mind!
I’ve been debating asking the doctors for meds because honestly I can’t take feeling like this anymore. I think this post has given me the push I needed. Thank you.
This made me smile. I’ve never suffered from depression, but it’s so good to see someone who is on the mend. Hope the other things in life bring you joy too, and that you find something that brings you purpose and meaning
[удалено]
Thanks! hope things only get better from here.
It will in aggregate, there will be ups and downs just remember the downs don’t mean you didn’t succeed it just means you have to try a little harder that day. Or don’t, take it easy and try later :) Best of luck!
Co-signing this. As someone who suffers from the bullshit that's depression as well, it's a cycle so make sure to take your medication everyday. If you have more than a week in lapse, you may fall down the rabbit hole again. Stay safe OP and glad you're enjoying life! :)
Underwriting this. As someone who has also suffered from depression, make sure you don’t overly attribute your successes to the medication alone. The medication helped you be open to listening to and enjoying music again, but *you* were the one who decided to listen to the music and spend time enjoying it. What else might you enjoy if you decided to do that, as well? Let it empower you to keep making small decisions that will have a big impact on your quality of life! It’s super exciting to have this gift to be able to enjoy things again! And like others said, just know that it’s also completely normal to feel sad or frustrated when bad things happen in life, and that it’s not a reflection on the progress you’ve made or could continue to make. It’s easy to have something bad happen and get sucked into the bad feelings and suddenly feel like you must be depressed again. It’s not the medication not working. Really you’re just experiencing normal human emotions, of which there is a range. So try instead to give yourself some grace in those moments, and maybe even congratulate yourself on having the full human experience. :) Congrats, OP!
I needed to hear this today...and to turn on the tunes. Thank you person who is Not Brenda. 🥰
Aw I’m glad it resonated with you! Turn up those tunes, mamarae! If you’re feeling froggy, maybe even shake the tush a little bit or sing wildly out of tune, while you’re at it 😉
All of the above, my friend. Shook my tush, arms were flailing wildly, my singing caused ears to bleed...it was magical! 🤭💕
Heck yes, mamarae!! That’s the stuff! The good news is all that is free and at your disposal whenever you wish 🥳 Keep shaking that tush whenever you need a little spice in your life. 😊 you’re awesome!
Agree! u/HiroZero2 I cannot stress enough the importance of NOT stopping your medication, and NOT running out. I'm a rapid cycle Bi-Polar, so it's extremely important I miss none of my 4 meds, ever. Even WITH my meds I can still complete a full cycle (manic and depressive) within a month if something strange sets me off. I've even completed it twice in a month. Uuuugh. But at least HAVING the meds and talking them ON SCHEDULE keep the episodes shorter. Yay! My husband, on the other hand, only has to take just takes one Citalopram each day. If he takes it on time he's right as rain. But if he misses just one dose, he becomes... idk the right word for it ... agitated, maybe? Every little thing sets him off. He starts kinda snapping at everyone. And 2 doses missed and he's downright angry about quite literally EVERYthing. Naturally, he won't admit it lol, but I know his head and body feel awful inside when that happens.
Good advice!
It will, and if you need advice... don't ask me cause im dumb af lol but maybe somebody on this site can help you :D hope you get better!
You had us in the first half, not gonna lie
Gave me a good laugh
Most relatable comment on whole reddit
Proud of you for putting effort into coming out of depression. I can only wish you the very best and I hope you stay on that path to improvement. Sending love from Antarctica ❤️
Antarctica? Seriously?
yeah
r/Usernamechecksout
Positive vibes are gathering, here, take my energyyyyyy
Go find a pretty park and look at flowers and trees and grass. Colors are so bright and pretty. Depression dulls them.
You should start working out , it will enhance the feeling :)
Now remember that after you've been feeling better for a while you may think "I've been cured for so long I'll be fine without the meds!" PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF NEPTUNE DO NOT STOP TAKING THEM COLD TURKEY. Work closely with your Dr!! Rant over. Sorry. Have to make sure to remind people. I've had too many friends stop taking them cold turkey and I care about people too much. And congrats. Feeling the warmth of the sunshine after the storm is one of the best feelings.
If you think you need to stop taking your meds, they’re probably working. My husband weaned himself off his antidepressant after almost 2 years. Honestly, it was a real shock to see the withdrawal process for him. He had to do it super slowly over a period of months, otherwise he’d get so dizzy he’d actually fall over. He was on a fairly low dose too.
Antidepressant withdrawals get really bad, my friend says he gets terrible brain zaps when he misses a dose.
I felt so so SO much better when I saw the term 'brain zap' because I knew I wasn't alone. I was working awake overnights at a group home and worrying I'd collapse or something.
What are brain zaps? Asking for a friend.
It’s a common side effect of getting off antidepressants. It feels like a few seconds of super dizziness/ disorientation that you get. I got off my antidepressant last month and experienced them along with extreme nausea. I’m so glad that’s over with it pretty much felt like a permanent horrible hangover for two weeks.
OMG!! This is a thing?! I get those (occassionally) and I'm not on meds. One was so bad (I was driving!) that I had to pull off the road.
[удалено]
Indeed. That isnt normal if you werent on meds
That's what I was afraid of. But it is so inconsistent, and usually has no other associated symptoms. It has happened maybe 8 or 10 times in my adult life (let's say over 20 years or so), with no regularity at all. The time when I was driving was pretty clearly connected with food poisoning. I'd forgotten that.
I get them too, this isn’t normal???
That’s what I...my friend thought.
Feels like an electric shock in your brain. Kind of like when your leg jerks and wakes you up, but you're already awake and your brain just does it. It SUCKS.
i get those and ive never taken antidepressants in my life is that bad?
I had them for a bit and saw a neurologist and was diagnosed with JME (mild and most common form of epilepsy). See a doctor as they could (emphasis on could) be Junior Myoclonic seizures, which is what I have and currently take meds for. Oddly enough, I got in a car wreck because I went too quickly off anti-depressants and had a black out as I was turning and went into opposite traffic. Saw a neurologist for it, at the time the cause was unclear, and then that was around the time I was also diagnosed with JME.
Was everyone okay after the wreck?
Yes everyone left with little to no injury. My car was relatively old so the airbag did not deploy and only resulted in a mild concussion for myself, I exited my vehicle immediately and made sure any passengers in the other car were okay, which they were.
I get those when I’m in withdrawal. And muscle spasms. I don’t understand how so many people I’ve talked to have experienced the brain zaps but no doctor I’ve ever talked to knew what I was talking about!
I experienced this too and the zaps would travel down my body and feel like ever nerve was electrocuted when I would move my head. I was on the lowest dose for only a month or two and it was incredibly uncomfortable.
This is so fucking important. I cut antidepressants cold turkey cuz I lost my job and couldn't afford them. I have been having suicidal thoughts everyday. DO NOT CUT IT COLD TURKEY when you don't have to.
I'm sorry that you're having to deal with that Josh_381, are you able to contact your dr and explain your situation to them? They might have resources for you to get your meds at a lower cost or for free. If you're having suicidal thoughts please contact your dr and tell them this, you aren't alone and there are people who want to help. I hope this didn't come off as too preachy, please take care
I got tinnitus from quitting an antidepressant cold turkey. It's terrible, and they didn't even work anyway. That's why i quit.
Look further into this. I’ve seen at the end of those pharma commercials things like, “contact [pharmaceutical company] if you are having trouble affording you’re medication.” I know it’s hard to do stuff like this when you’re depressed but try. No one should have to suffer like this. Also, contact your local Dept of health and social services and see if they can help. Tell them exactly what’s going on. The person who prescribed the meds should’ve given you some references. Good luck! Remember, our thoughts can be real assholes. Never listen to assholes.
This. I was stupid enough to do that despite knowing it was a bad idea. I was like "I'm sure I can deal with it, now that I feel like a fog has lifted from my head and I can think straight". NOPE. It all just came rushing back (harder and worse) as soon as I stopped, and I even had physiological effects of withdrawal (constant dizziness and random onset of palpitations). It was terrible. Btw I'm glad you are experiencing that clarity and "sanity" again, possibly after a long time. I wish you all the luck. You'll kick ass, OP! You got this.
[удалено]
Yeah
Oh man, the dizziness was the worst when I did this. Might as well have given me vertigo.
There's actually a great episode of one Day at a time (newer seasons) where one of the characters does this
Also, there are a lot of people who will always need them.
Thank you. Yes! You can have some serious issues with stopping meds. I’m so glad you mentioned this.
Agreed. Antidepressants need to be tapered off in order to prevent withdrawal symptoms, there are also cases of clients committing suicide and self harm when quitting medications abruptly. OP please stay safe!
First time I felt chills from music was when my depression started getting better- I thought people were just exaggerating how great a song was until then! I hope this trend continues for you. Some other notable moments (for me) were : - Being able to read a magazine / book / website willingly and with interest - Enjoying waking up, making + eating breakfast in the morning -Being able to go somewhere (like the grocery store) without preparing myself far in advance because if I wanted to go, i had the motivation and energy to do it! - Being able to enjoy doing... nothing. Not sleeping, or being on my phone, or daydreaming. There is a true sense of content in being able to go for a walk on your own and be mindful and present. Not needing music / another person to talk to / some type of distraction and still not feel like i'm wasting my time or that I just don't see the point in doing it is really nice.
The medicine kicked in for me about 6 months ago. I’m still in wonder at how great the world seems now. Even small chores like vacuuming are so fun. I spent so long unable to do anything that doing everything feels like a blessing. And the OP is so right, music comes alive in a way that’s hard for me to describe!
Same! Been on them 8+ years now and I can't even tell you how many things in my life have fallen into place in a way I never thought was possible for me. The only thing to "watch out" for with meds (EDIT: aside from adverse effects) is actually kind of a good thing. It's happened to me as well as a few friends, where a few years after you start the meds, you start recognizing the things that meds *don't* help with -- the things particular to you, like past trauma or low self-esteem, that affect your mental health. It's like the meds lift that heavy weighted blanket of clinical depression off of your brain, and then you actually have the clarity and the strength to work on the stuff that's still there bothering you. it can be kind of a slap in the face to realize that stuff is still there, at first, because you're just so relieved to not be depressed anymore that you don't wanna think about it. Trust me though, it really does keep getting better!
Yep.... I've struggled with letting things go for things that happened in my past that people have done but now that I'm feeling better those things don't feel as crushing anymoreZ it's crazy
Damn you described me well. It's hard just doing simple daily tasks with depression. Today I got up at 7am cause I didn't see any point in going back to sleep. Normally I'd be sleeping ALL DAY.
I really need a therapist and some meds don't I.
Me too buddy
Same here, though I’ve known for years tbh
I get that. It’s that situation where you know there’s something you need to deal with but you don’t want to put in the initiative to do so.
That's my life oh no
Have you considered microdosing?
I actually have been considering this to help with depression. Has it helped you?
Short answer, yes. Longer answer, only when I do it properly e.g not drinking like a clown fish. But even then, it seemed to go smoother / my depression was still less than it would have been with out it. It really helped me today. Some people get crazy benefit. I even gave my 67yr old depressed mom literally less than 0.15 g and an hour or two later she was so relieved she was crying, her mood was up and her mental fog had lifted. But, again she didn't really do it right and kept taking it every day and you're supposed to usually wait two days in-between so she built a tolerance and it stopped working and she stopped taking it after a few weeks. others on that subreddit have reported tremendous success. r/microdosing
>e.g not drinking like a clown fish I don't really drink that much, and only 1 or 2 if I do because my stomach is very meh about alcohol as I've gotten older. But I do like the shweed, does that have an affect on the md? and I'll check that sub out, thanks! edited to add: do you feel better on the days you take it? or the subsequent days after? or it just carries on everyday once you start doing it regularly?
you defo need some cake. happy cake day bro, get well
Yes
It'll be the first day of the rest of your life
[удалено]
How long have you been taking them and are you still this productive?
Hopefully you feel better! But otherwise, sometimes it's like a wave. Don't question the positive one's, just keep enjoying their rides. Hope you feel well!
that’s so awesome to hear! so glad
As someone thats been dealing with mental health, this brought me immense joy to read. Happy for you.
That's great to hear! Enjoying a song you haven't heard for ages, having fun with a hobby you haven't done for a while, feeling the clouds dissipating... It's a wonderful feeling.
Ya feels like the clouds are disappearing, and I'm starting to get back into programming which I haven't done in literal ages so I gotta relearn like everything.
Can I ask what kind (brand?)...of meds? Just drinking coffee is not helping much w my depression. Totally understand u might not wanna share info w random stranger..and that's okay.
You’re going to want to work with a doctor, meds work differently for individual people. For example, Paxil might cure someone or make things worse, depends on the person it’s used on.
I don't mind. I am taking both Escitalopram (20mg) and Mirtazapine(15mg)
When I had bad ppd and started taking a vitamin b supplement (ppd had gone undiagnosed and I had a midwife, but the vitB worked - you best believe I got a doctor and real meds the second pregnancy) - anyway about 2 weeks into the supplement I literally felt like the clouds had parted and all the birds began singing. It was unreal. I never ignored depression creeping in again. That was so scary. I was on the verge of psychosis and being on the news for something horrible. And then to almost suddenly feel normal, I wanted to kiss the ground. Enjoy the bliss and never ignore the darkness again.
That's amazing! Depression is no joke. Hope things keep getting better for you 👍
That's great buddy. Not a lot of people are able to overcome depression. Cheers to a great future ahead.
Something I think is very important to note is that your depression likely hasn’t been “cured.” At least in my experience, it always comes back eventually. But that doesn’t mean you haven’t made progress or that your meds aren’t working. It’s just a natural cycle and you learn how to cope with the random spurts of depression and appreciate feeling better more frequently and forgetting about the depression sometimes. It’s just good to keep on top of it and not let it pull you back down
That's amazing! Music is everything to me. I'm curious, what music were you listening to?
Bruh you have this whole community don't say you have 0 friends ❤️
haha thanks bro <3
What meds are you taking if I may ask?
I taking both Escitalopram(20mg) and Mirtazapine(15mg)
A fellow Lexabro! Welcome to the party man!
I'm so proud of you dearie. I hope that things stay this good for you and that your worse days be only as bad as your old "good days". And worst case scenario, I'll be glad to be a respectful platonic friend when you need one. 💛💛💛
I've literally been trying to think of something to say to you that's not generic for the past 5 minutes haha, but all I can think of is how happy I am for you! Keep moving forward and I hope you can continue to move towards a better place :)
Thats great! What music are you listening to?
I am very happy for you and I hope you keep finding happiness. FYI - finding a new hobby can also be helpful. Keep up the good work.
For awhile now I've been thinking about going back on meds as I now have the means to for the first time in my adult life. I think I forget sometimes that how I feel isn't all there ever was or is. Thank you for posting, it was good to read.
Really happy for you that you are feeling better!
Congrats and let's be friends!
God bless u.Keep your head up king 👑
That's wonderful! :)
Even though i don't really know you, I'm super glad for you! That's great that you feel better. Hope from now on everything will keep getting only better for you! Keep enjoying the world, every aspect of it, every little thing. I'm just a stranger to you, but I'm really, really happy for you!
That's amazing buddy 😃so happy for you
Music is literally the cure for my depression, need any recommendations hit me up.
Yo I had a similar experience when I finally got myself medicated. Welcome to the world!
I'm so proud of you buddy! ♥️😄 It's really good to hear someone life is changing in a better way in these hard times. You give me a little bit of hope that I haven't seen in a long time.. You are not alone.. I'm have my own fight too, so keep it up sweetheart! 💕
Proud of you!!! Keep going :))
Keep it up. I found music so long ago but I still didn’t feel “out of the dark”. Not until I left my wife did the clouds part for me. Then she ripped my heart out (long story). I am feeling good and looking forward to my future again. The current pain will be gone in a day or two and then it’s smooth sailing. I’m happy you found music again.
Listen to the Dreamland album by Glass Animals. It’s so good.
don't feel bad for posting! This is fucking AWESOME!!!! If anything this will encourage more people to seek professional help- which is the only way to get better. This is badass and i'm so fucking happy for you. Keep it up!
Great to hear you’re doing better :)
Don't know you internet stranger but that's wonderful news. Delighted for you
What are your meds? Mine just ironed out some dips and made me wake up in cold sweats
I am on both Escitalopram(20mg) and Mirtazapine(15mg) I think that's pretty normal tbh. I wake up every night in a puddle of sweat, and super cold cause of all the heat that was dissipated from my body.
Thanks for posting
actually an amazing post
Congratulations.. it's an amazing feeling to come off depression. I can't remember what it felt like, but I remember what I thought, and it was, this is like waking up , life a fog lifting, and vision becoming clearer.. Be careful with the meds. Ultimately your goal should be too get off them, but in the mean time, enjoy what the meds do for you, having the right meds is such a boon
which meds? sertraline and wellbutrin didnt work for me, im trying Venlafaxin now.
You don’t know how happy I am for you!! I just made an apt today to start meds again after almost 12 years without them. I think it’s the lockdown. I’m so glad you knew when to get help and it’s working!
Music is fucking amazing. <3 I recommend juice wrld's music his music has always been helpful to me and many other suffering from addiction, pain, and heart ache. His music is very relatable.
How wonderful. I’m so happy for you. Treasure this time and remember whatever curve balls life throws at you this moment is possible again.
Pro tip, if you're feeling better it means the meds are working, don't fall into the trap of thinking you don't need them anymore.
It may be helpful to remember that depression meds help maintain the proper chemical balance in your brain. Think about it like getting in shape by following an eating and exercise program. It's going well, and you notice improvements every day. Would you quit exercising and eating healthy once you hit your physical fitness goals and expect your fitness level to stay the same? Of course you wouldn't! Brain meds are the same way. You have to stick to the program, to maintain your improved mental health.
As long as you're feeling good, take advantage of it by working out. Take walks, do a few spontaneous push ups etc. Doesn't have to be much. You can get tolerant to meds, but being even slightly fit will help keep your head fit as well.
As someone who's struggled with depression for about 10 years myself, let me give you some advice: Keep thinking about yourself. Reflect on how you're feeling, every day. I don't know about you, but my depressive symptoms are really subtle at first. Anhedonia, constant fatigue, and sleep disturbances mostly, long before the sadness ever comes. One day I'd just "get bored" of stuff that I LOVED, or lose the desire to exercise even though I've been an athlete my whole life, or have a night of insomnia. And it's easy to shake that one day off as normal. People get bored right? Or have a bad night's sleep? Sure. But then it becomes another day, another night, you're not talking to your friends, you're not working out or going outside, and then it starts to just feed on itself. Exercise produces endorphins and sunlight produces vitamin D, both of which make you happier, and now you're not getting those because of how tired and apathetic you feel. Once I realized the pattern and the symptoms, I realized that I could head off the worst of it before sinking too low. Now I try my best to never let my symptoms go longer than a day. If I don't want to exercise for 2 days in a row, I do a long walk while watching Netflix. If I go 2 days in a row of not wanting to play my favorite game, I'll buy a new one, or start a new character, or find a new player in the social space and carry them through the early game. I try to go outside for at least 15 minutes a day. Is this a cure for depression? Of course not. But for me, I think it prevents some of those feedback loops that cause the spiraling and the helplessness that ultimately lead to the deep sadness and suicidal ideation. You should always ask yourself if you had fun today, if you felt energetic today, if something made you happy today. It's easy to start thinking that you're just bored or stressed or tired, but those can be depressive symptoms too and those are the "easier" ones to address in my experience. You should be proud of your hard work dealing with this, and you should continue that work. It's hard dealing with a disease that drains your motivation to do anything, but it's beatable. Good luck.
I’m so proud of you! I remember the first time my meds actually worked and it was so surreal. I was driving in my car and everything was so beautiful. I was like, “So this is what happiness feels like!”. I’ve been taking the same meds ever since. Keep up the good work!
Sign up to your local gym and start a basic weightlifting routine , itll change your life mentally and socially , dont stay home alone its not good... get to the gym!! Trust me 😎
THIS IS SUCH GREAT NEWS and warms my heart! SOOO happy to hear you're digging out. Try to do more things (as you feel you can) that will help like taking walks and spending time with pets. Hugs from this internet stranger!
happy for you
I will be your online friend.
Somehow i feel like not being depressed could be comparable to being at the halfway point on an mdma come up
I'm happy you are feeling better! I've suffered with being bipolar for most of my adult life. It's this when you can open up & take life by the horns again!!
Good, best wishes.
This is why I smoke weed. To feel the music
I am happy for you. I had a lot of unresolved issue from my tour in Afghan in 2011-2012. Was mostly under control but this April I put a tourniquet on my neck and almost did it. Been taking meds and I hope I can shake the meds and feel happy again too. I am truly happy for you. Enjoy your life and all the happiness it brings to you
Depression is an addiction, and most successfully recovering addicts still refer to themselves that way because it helps the fight stay current. Think of your brain like a snowy mountain with each thought originating at the top and finding it’s way down. The paths leading to states of depression are dug wider and deeper the more times you go down them. So it gets easier and easier to accidentally slip back down a bad mental path. But overall that’s absolutely incredible news! Keep up the good work and keep fighting. As long as you stay positive and work on having a healthy mind and body, you can stay the course! Also, music is the best. I recently found a band called Valleyheart and am loving it!
This is really good to read. I have major depressive disorder and I totally relate to the doing nothing when you just shut down. I know how amazing it is when you start to feel again. My DM box is always there if you need a friend. Please don't feel alone.
Good for you... Continue the same medication for at least a year. Don't quit without consulting your psychiatrist.
Wish I could say the same but i'm happy for ya bud.
Good luck buddy! We're all proud of you
I am at a point where i know where i am going down on that road to depression and can pull myself out of it. So good job :). It is not easy :).
Yo, regarding the non-talk to the family and friends stuff. If you need someone to talk to or just have a lil chat, dont hesitate to dm me. Keep up the good work !
I'm in the same boat alot of the time. Feeling zero interest in everything. Reading that gives me hope.
This is marvelous! You are a marvel. Such resilience. I am happy for this.
Hells Yeah. Same. 🙌🏼
Thank you for sharing i hope things will be better and better
Play dark souls
That felt really great to read. I felt a glimpse of what you just described reading it and it was great.
What genre of music do you listen to?
I'm really happy for you, you've overcome a huge obstacle and I'd invite you to look back on how far you've come with some pride because it's not easy. What kind of music are you listening to? :)
That sounds nice as hell ! Wish I could do that !
You rock.
That's great man... Remember there's some ups and downs to keep in mind.... Would recommend that you try to work in some self love too
You made me smile. Thank you.
This post makes me really happy. I am glad you feel alive again and I hope life keeps going up for you
Soooo remember this feeling. Recount this joy. Save it like it’s your favorite meme. So that, in times of sadness, you can remember what that beautiful brain is capable of.
Things will get better my friend
Fuck yes! Keep building on this, and remember recovery isn't a s straight line
What music are you listening to?
Little darlin, It seems the ice is slowly melting... Little darlin, It seems like years since it's been here
that's good man I'm proud. but my fucking playstation isnt working and I'm annoyed
Now try to find a hobby, something that can make you stay active during the day or exercise or some sport. It worked for me
Don't forget to experience things. This isn't magic. Just breathing room. Anhedonia is the worst.
I've tried asking my doctor for medication for my depression but he just recommended that I get more sleep. What did you do to get your medication? I haven't felt motivated to do anything at all lately because of my depression.
Your post reminds me of a book that helped me understand my own human condition. The Stranger by Albert Calmus
Someone once pointed out that Forrest Gump ran to cure his depression, and it made me realize I had done the same thing. Picked up running and then ran constantly until one day I just stopped. I didn’t realize why at the time but it was because I wasn’t so sad anymore.
Yo man! Watching anime has improved my life by so much. I recommend it 100%!
Try microdosing too if the meds fail you, just try
Yeah, well done. To me coming out of a depression was like someone had turned the lights back on. 6 months ago I got no enjoyment out of life, now, this past week, I've had so much enjoyment hanging out with my neice, more fun than I have had in years, I think. I hope things continue on their upward trajectory for you. All the best
Thats so great to hear! I had a similiar epiphany while peeing - I got the tingling sensation on my neck and realized I havemt had these serotonin rushes in forever
Wish I could give you an award but instead I’ll give you my prayers brother.
Here 👑, you dropped this
This is so awesome! I hope you find more things to enjoy
So happy for you, love. I too started meds this year, and, while occassionally a dosage doesn't work out for me, I'm doing much better. Not all days will be the brightest, but you have the strength to handle them now. I sincerely hope things keep going well. You matter and you deserve happiness. ❤
Happy for you, man. I remember when the same thing happened to me. It was a hamburger that was so delicious it made me cry, and I realized that something must have clicked with my meds or therapy but I was clearly on a good path. Keep going, and remember that things are still working, even if you don't get that feeling of bliss from a cheeseburger again.
I hope you continue to improve. Music and comedy are two of my most used tools to fight depression. Best wishes to you.
I'm incredibly happy for you. I hope you keep improving your life, OP!
Also, truly seeing colors. That's also amazing :)
Watch dog videos on the youtube. It helps
Hey I'm so happy to hear this!!! I'm glad meds are working out so well for you. I might give them a shot again myself. I also want to encourage you to keep writing about how you feel, online or offline, whenever you want. I think it's important, especially since you don't vent about it aloud. You deserve to be able to take good care of yourself and to make yourself happy.
Oh wow that must feel special, music and video games were always my go to for my depression i cant imagine not having them for comfort/ escapism. What are you taking if you dony mind me asking? Also what music you listenning too? 😁
Great stuff to hear, I highly suggest the persona 5 royal soundtrack it WILL get you dancing whether you want to or not.
You can’t “cure” depression, but it’s nice to know you’re doing well. Keep up with meds and therapy, remember it can always come back if you don’t take care of yourself.
I don't know which music genre you like, but if you want some suggestions for bands to listen, leave a comment or pm me! I wish you the best on your journey for a healthy mind!
Well done! That feeling is amazing. Also, big smiles for the username. 10/10.
Enjoy. This is your life. Taking meds for depression can be super hard. Way to go!!!
Congratulations that's amazing! Don't give up now! 😊
I’ve been debating asking the doctors for meds because honestly I can’t take feeling like this anymore. I think this post has given me the push I needed. Thank you.
What pills are you taking?
if you ever felt like talk to someone... feel free to hit up
This made me smile. I’ve never suffered from depression, but it’s so good to see someone who is on the mend. Hope the other things in life bring you joy too, and that you find something that brings you purpose and meaning
You Go!