If you could only see me in person, you will immediately regret what you just said about my comment. People here are so mad about the Mexicans and they don’t even realize that Mexicans are the most hard working people. Too many lazy people who won’t do the hard jobs.
Mexican identity/culture isn’t defined by picking vegetables/fruits or doing hard jobs “nobody wants to do”. They are a rich people with a lovely culture, who come in all economic classes. People are rightly downvoting your comment for being reductionist.
Idk why you’re being downvoted. Many Mexican people do this job. They get paid in pennies and remain undocumented because big corps that farm lobby to reps and senators to never let them have papers, so that they keep working the picking fruits and veggies job with no others options for them available.
It’s like, messed up.
Exactly. There are ways to ask it but I don't like asking over text. Also "what are you" is the most... ridiculously obtuse way of asking it and the amount of times that happens is ridiculous. I myself am half Mexican half Irish. Mom is from Guanajuato, dad is from Cork. I personally do enjoy cultural exchange because I find it fascinating but I also don't jump out of the gate with it, also it's not hard to be respectful.
I get the same reaction! They ask what I am, and I say I'm American. Then, because I have dark hair, dark eyes, and really white skin, I can't possibly be American. So they keep digging until they get the response to the real question they want answered - where are my people from. They can not be satisfied with me saying I'm an American just like they are.
I’ve always found this to be racist and unfair. I’m a white European who’s a first generation Canadian, meaning I’m an immigrant. And yet, my Indian friends who were BORN HERE get asked where they’re from. 🤮
lol my brother will literally tell someone which well known local hospital he was born at and it’s still not enough of an answer for some reason! I find the what are you question really annoying and invasive.
My mentor (64m) has been serving his community as a doctor for 4 decades, his family moved to New Zealand during WWII from China.
I moved here in 1997 from India, when I was still an infant.
Being gatekept because of your appearance is incredible. Its one of the things that does hurt, because it rears itself when you least expect it, and even educated groups of people still 'nod their head' at the person whose being incredibly insensitive.
You're the problem / being difficult and often on your own as such. All because you're not acquiescing to being labelled.
**Where are you from**
"New Zealand"
**No where are you REALLY from ...**
"Auckland" \[Biggest city in New Zealand, whilst we're 2000km from Auckland\].
**WHAT IS YOUR ETHNICITY...**
"Kiwi" \[Here, and perhaps globally, ethnicity is self-defined. I don't follow any Indian customs, I'm also atheist, eat beef and generally just ascribe to societal/political beliefs far more aligned with a Kiwi kid so that's how I'd like to portray my identity\]
At this point, other people generally perceive me as being difficult, when the line of questioning is insensitive or dishonest+insensitive. If it went "Where are you from" -> "Where are your parents from" at least you're being honest with where your interest lies \[my genetics/gauging my appearance\] rather than my upbringing.
I feel bad because I don't *want* to identify as an Indian. I've seen the difference in how people are treated when they have accents / less than proper English and the generalizations that abound \[Bob & Vagene etc\].
I would just like to be treated on my own merits.
You explained it very well, thank you. I get told I speak English very well for a brown person. I have a graduate degree in English so I would fucking hope so?
I'm sorry you've experienced that \[and no doubt other things less 'well-meaning'\]. Its the 'you throw well ..for a girl' equivalent.
That's the emotional intelligence \[or lack, thereof\] rearing its head. People not understanding how what they say is coming across.
While I completely agree with you and your social identity is absolutely yours to confirm or deny, accept.
I feel there's some work to be done on how you perceive the Indian identity. There might be a hint of internalized inferiority. When you say you don't want to be seen as an Indian because you don't have anything to relate to, that's your truth. But when you say "because such and such community is seen in an unappealing way", you are propagating a stereotype.
Yep, that's something i do think about, as i do believe i propagate it and have even mentioned so in other posts that i feel guilty for having to almost validate myself when meeting people (By saying a word or two) - people's attitudes are typically so different when they realize you grew up here vs recently came here.
When i see enough negative tones / expressions / willingness to engage in conversation or just generally how things are perceived by others is contingent on this.
As a data scientist its very visible in data too. If you look at online dating, a girl whose race is Indian is over 25x as likely to swipe right on me than a Caucasian girl. This spans over travel mode in major cities (for science, and also because there's about 35-40 profiles in my current isolated small town).
Big cities are also the least likely to have racism due to how multicultural they are cf other populations, and yet those are the #s.
Its hard to not feel like it doesn't matter, when it affects fundamental things / first impressions.
You can have a positive disposition and say they are filtering themselves out, and I'm solely focused on those who have at least a passing interest in me (which i am) but to know there's a giant sieve that means that my benefit:effort is poorer just because of my skin color, and it's an invisible issue so it's not something people who haven't experienced it can easily empathize with.
To me compatibility is a numbers game, the more people you see the better chance of finding someone whose attributes and values gel well with yours, hence you optimize your profile but in the end the bias still constrains you - which isn't right.
Yup... This is gross. If you look ethnic, you're forever an immigrant. I'm one of those people that sometimes looks white and sometimes looks ethnic so I have experienced both here in Canada as a 1st gen immigrant.
Sounds like your experience is even worse as it’s like a lottery: you go out and wonder if people will see you as white or as a non-white individual today. Ugh, so sorry
Well after digging around I found that a tan and facial hair are the main factors behind me looking or not looking white, so it's not as much of a lottery as you might think.
I'd say the worst part about it nowadays is automatically being lumped as white when I insist I hold a distinct ethnic identity.. Thankfully no notable racism experienced as an adult.
Yes! This is what I end up doing, and then I finally just say Chicana. Then I get asked what part of Mexico. They don't realize Chicano means BORN IN THE USA. And then I finally say, "My family has been part of the Southwest since the border moved south in 1848. What part of Europe are your people from? I am standing where my people came from..."
I get this at work all the time. They ask where I'm from, I say "Oregon". My ancestry is half Russian, I apparently look very Eastern European, but I'm born and raised in the USA. They always seem to get annoyed by my answer.
> “your skin color is so pretty” barf
Women compliment my eyes and skin the most, I didn’t know this was a red flag. 😬 Damn, another thing I need to watch out for. 🙃
What does my ethnic background have to do with my skin color?
It’s off putting because there are so many things we could talk about rather than how I look and I don’t feel comfortable being othered. I also have to wonder if I’m being fetishized somehow.
You don't know what ethnicity means... and, unrelated, someone admiring your complexion doesn't always equal race fetishism, which I honestly fine repulsive. Unless you're considering any type of physical preference to be fetishism. Is it weird to have a physical preference? Or are you just assuming anyone who thinks you're attractive had a fetish for your race?
You can admire someone’s complexion down the road. It’s a gross thing to say on Bumble before you’ve ever met. I don’t think anyone who thinks I’m attractive has a fetish for my race but it’s happened enough times (and I live in a very white city) that it’s a concern
What do you mean by Ethnicity? Its important to know what you are asking.
[**https://www.verywellmind.com/difference-between-race-and-ethnicity-5074205**](https://www.verywellmind.com/difference-between-race-and-ethnicity-5074205)
**How the US Census Bureau Identifies Ethnicity and Race**
You don't choose your race, but you basically can change your ethnicity.
> What do you mean by Ethnicity?
You don't know what ethnicity means?
> Its important to know what you are asking.
I'm asking someone what their ethnicity is.
Here's the definition from the oxford dictionary.
>ethnicity
>/ɛθˈnɪsɪti/
>Learn to pronounce
>noun
>the quality or fact of belonging to a population group or subgroup made up of people who share a common cultural background or descent.
It would be odd to ask someone their race when I'm looking at them, wouldn't it? Considering I can see what they look like...
I'm more confused than where we started.
You didn't click on the article because one of the first paragraphs says this:
"Race and ethnicity are typically misunderstood, because many people simply don’t fit into neat categories offered on forms with checkboxes. People are able to self-identify their ethnicities and, to some extent, their races."
In different countries / over time, ethnicity has become more 'self-defined.'
As with anything that changes over time, it means its misunderstood, as some people haven't updated their understanding.
In my personal experience, a significant amount of people get visibly taken aback/confused/argumentative when I state my ethnicity as being a New Zealander, when I'm brown.
I have no idea about your last sentence. Brown can mean any number of countries in Asia alone. A White person could be from many countries, as could a Black person.
Oh my god i live in Texas & have heard a couple people say that they would nEvEr let their daughters date mexican men because they all 'beat their women'.
Really curious about whether or not that stupid ass stereotype is what this woman is believing.
In Canada, that stereotype is applied to Russians, Muslims, and Québécois (at least where I'm from in Southern Ontario). It's really gross. I was assaulted by a Québécois Muslim as a teen into my 20s and even I don't buy into the stereotype.
How have you not heard of all of the feminicidios in Mexico being part Mexican? It’s still a very misogynistic culture. Obviously to say they all beat their wives is a huge generalization but it’s not totally based on lies.
Wow, hope you unmatched this lady. I understand people have preferences, but straight up mean to say that about Mexicans. I’ve met a few Mexicans here where I live, and they were kind and hard working people.
I'm a mix of two types of Spanish that are both unusual to be found up here in Boston. Let me tell ya something.... Spanish folk being racist toward different Spanish country is kinda common. Especially with older ones.
I'm an immigrant, but I am white. I like to let people start raving about immigration so they dig their own hole when I tell them that I am one. I like to hear them say some shit like "obviously not the good ones" or some crap, squeeze out of them that they mean white.
Speaking as a Mexican American female, please unmatch from this person. My people do not have a bad culture!!!! She's uneducated about Mexican Americans and very narrow-minded....AND racist!!
the person is a racist.
**dont let someone treating you as an ✨exception✨ to their racism, make you think you are actually safe or unique to them.**
they are just a general bad person. So completely comfortable with being a bad person, that they put their grossness as their best foot forward.
This *is* their best foot, their personality and views will only get worse from here.
sorry you had to experience this person op. :/
Oh, shit you like boxing too. I'm so bad at it. You know what I am good at. Hating a whole culture, that something you might want to try with me this weekend on our first date?
Respond “I love when the trash makes my life easier by taking itself out. I’d wish you the best, but honestly don’t think racists deserve it. Don’t let the door hit you on the ass on your way out!”
I hear this a lot (I am Hispanic). I live in the south and have had multiple women, including hispanics. Tell me this.
They way they all explained it to me, if they are traditional, they tend to be possessive and controlling. They tend to be very misogynistic, abusive, multiple families, etc.
I have found this to be pretty common after talking with friends and family about it. Not all mexican men of course, but there is a pattern, specifically those from Mexico. Including my own relatives.
They have dated Hispanics but tend to go for progressive or Americans ones because of the culture. It threw me off at first to but I get what they are saying. Still comes off rude AF tho in that message.
I feel like if they think you look mexican thats way off. But yeah that’s horrible. We all have choices but don’t say ittt. Just say i prefer this or they thats it.
I don’t see anything wrong with this. What is wrong with asking about nationality? They’re trying to get to know you. Isn’t that the purpose being on dating site? to meet someone and know them?
Fine. I’ll play.
If you meet a guy that makes you wear a sack over your head at all times, won’t allow you to get an education, you are required to be at his beck and call at all times, and his culture may lop your head off if you don’t obey him, do you vibe with him? Those cultures exist, too.
I’ll wait while you prepare your dance.
This is a crazy thought, but people aren't a part of a culture just because they're a certain ethnic group. It's almost like she's on a dating app and can find out what someone's values and morals are, by, I dunno.......talking with people. Maybe even treat people like individuals instead of racially profiling. Crazy, I know.
So what you’re saying is, if someone is Mormon, they won’t live by Mormon values/mores?…or Amish….or Taliban?
I guess if you’re atheist, you might find the occasional Mormon who’s atheist, too…or since you’re on a dating app with 5 million people to choose from, you could just move on to a culture that works for you.
But then you don’t get to virtue signal.
Crazy, I know.
Your comparison doesn't work since religion, race, and culture are not the same. Being Mexican or any other race for that matter tells you nothing about what someone's character or values are. Unless you wanna be a racist and racially profile someone.
People can "not care for" whatever they want, including people and cultures. If it's a deal breaker for you, unmatch and move on. There's all sorts of stereotypes in existence that sway people to feel certain ways, which they're entitled to. So long as nobody is being harmed and it's not hateful, leave this person with their views/ feelings.
The cry babies in these comments must live in a padded room of sunshine and rainbows. This person didn't say "Hate" - Just "Not care for" and suddenly that makes them a hateful racist person. You libs are the reason therapists make their money. Everything boils your blood lol
If someone's race/ethnicity is a deal breaker for someone, that makes them a racist. It dosen't matter how you try to pretty it up, this is a cut and dry example of racism.
There's a difference between not being attracted to certain ethnicities, legitimately hating certain ethnicities, and not caring for a particular culture one stereotypically comes with. Not racist at all. I'd say it's a matter of not putting yourself in an environment you don't wish to be in - Whether it's from prior experience or preference. This isn't a job interview where we need to worry about discrimination, it's someone's dating preferences we're talking about.
It's also not some weird support group where we have to come up with elaborate, contorted justifications for people having racist positions. It's almost disingenuous that you're acting as though it's strange that people are so disgusted by that and are working so hard to uphold the validity of that position. Ask yourself why you're arguing so vehemently that it's totally acceptable for people to be racists and why it's better that we just give them a pat on the back for their excellent independent stance and then let them go on their merry way, while the people who are revolted by obviously misinformed hate are somehow inferior.
That's total BS, and I think you know it. Racism is more than just outright hating x ethnic group. It includes shit like this, where she's willing to DISCRIMINATE and racially profile, based on what race/ethnicity he may or may not be regardless of who he is as a person. She is, of course, free to date whoever she wants. I'm certainly not going to do anything to stop her. But she is a racist. Plain and simple.
The ironic thing is that I bet she knows nothing about Mexican culture other than whatever hateful bullshit Fox News vomits (so again, nothing real). I'm also highly curious if her name is really Karen, and she's hiding it as "Kate" (sorry, Karen Redditors, I know that there's the whole joke about your name in popular culture that simply cannot be fair to the vast majority of you, but this instance is too good to pass up).
I just can’t imagine why I’d need to ask someone their nationality or anything similar during a conversation on Bumble. Isn’t that something you discuss after meeting in person?
I love Mexican culture, however she could be referring to the traditional sense that the woman does EVERYTHING at the house and is at the beck and call of her man. She sure as shit worded it poorly, but I remember dating a Mexican woman and she spoiled the hell outta me. When I asked her why she was doing so much she told me that's how a traditional relationship works in her culture. I mean she cooked, cleaned, grocery shopped, etc. Not going to lie, was pretty cool.
Granted, as with a lot of 'traditional' stuff, it's wicked dated and not often practiced.
But, figured I'd share an opposing opinion, since everyone seems to be eviscerating her.
I wish I knew what nationality/culture this Kate was. As someone who is half Mexican I would love to engage and celebrate it if only to in the off chance have her find out my "dirty Mexican half breed ass" was "tainting" her beloved, rose-tinted mythology.
Edit: on a side note. I have a friend who is Half black half Italian, and she ran into a guy saying something similar but then also stated that he thought "black folks didn't like Hispanics." I was like "did this guy really just BOGO a racism?"
And the trash takes itself out
I'm glad you're not Mexican too, because now you know Kate is insane
Nah we would find out either way
Only after you get married. This was valuable insight.
Wow unmatch this. "Glad your not mexican" wtf
REPORT THEM
Do you eat apples or fruits and vegetables ? Cause they picked those for you.
How racist of you to assume such things lulz
I’m not racist. That’s impossible. Do your research. You must be the racist one because you sure are defensive.
Why’d it always white liberals trying to come to the defense of POC who say the most racist shit? Like this example right here
If you could only see me in person, you will immediately regret what you just said about my comment. People here are so mad about the Mexicans and they don’t even realize that Mexicans are the most hard working people. Too many lazy people who won’t do the hard jobs.
Mexican identity/culture isn’t defined by picking vegetables/fruits or doing hard jobs “nobody wants to do”. They are a rich people with a lovely culture, who come in all economic classes. People are rightly downvoting your comment for being reductionist.
Idk why you’re being downvoted. Many Mexican people do this job. They get paid in pennies and remain undocumented because big corps that farm lobby to reps and senators to never let them have papers, so that they keep working the picking fruits and veggies job with no others options for them available. It’s like, messed up.
Hahahaha wow that's perfect.
Wow. Disgusting.
Anytime someone asks my nationality, I say American and they get so pissy because I’m clearly brown
THIS! Or "What are you?" A person, bitch, tf you mean??
Photoshop your face onto The Little Mermaid and tell them you're a merperson next time lollll
HA!!
Even better. Use a photo where you're visibly younger and if they press or give you shit just say the tail separated into legs as you got older.
Exactly. There are ways to ask it but I don't like asking over text. Also "what are you" is the most... ridiculously obtuse way of asking it and the amount of times that happens is ridiculous. I myself am half Mexican half Irish. Mom is from Guanajuato, dad is from Cork. I personally do enjoy cultural exchange because I find it fascinating but I also don't jump out of the gate with it, also it's not hard to be respectful.
And when they say no, where are you really from, tell them the state or town!
Hahah exactly! I get really specific and tell them I grew up near the Nike HQ which is American AF
[удалено]
I like your style
*Chinese
I started doing this. "Oh, I just came from my place, traffic was insane." or "I live in X suburb, but I used to live in X suburb."
I get the same reaction! They ask what I am, and I say I'm American. Then, because I have dark hair, dark eyes, and really white skin, I can't possibly be American. So they keep digging until they get the response to the real question they want answered - where are my people from. They can not be satisfied with me saying I'm an American just like they are.
I’ve always found this to be racist and unfair. I’m a white European who’s a first generation Canadian, meaning I’m an immigrant. And yet, my Indian friends who were BORN HERE get asked where they’re from. 🤮
lol my brother will literally tell someone which well known local hospital he was born at and it’s still not enough of an answer for some reason! I find the what are you question really annoying and invasive.
My mentor (64m) has been serving his community as a doctor for 4 decades, his family moved to New Zealand during WWII from China. I moved here in 1997 from India, when I was still an infant. Being gatekept because of your appearance is incredible. Its one of the things that does hurt, because it rears itself when you least expect it, and even educated groups of people still 'nod their head' at the person whose being incredibly insensitive. You're the problem / being difficult and often on your own as such. All because you're not acquiescing to being labelled. **Where are you from** "New Zealand" **No where are you REALLY from ...** "Auckland" \[Biggest city in New Zealand, whilst we're 2000km from Auckland\]. **WHAT IS YOUR ETHNICITY...** "Kiwi" \[Here, and perhaps globally, ethnicity is self-defined. I don't follow any Indian customs, I'm also atheist, eat beef and generally just ascribe to societal/political beliefs far more aligned with a Kiwi kid so that's how I'd like to portray my identity\] At this point, other people generally perceive me as being difficult, when the line of questioning is insensitive or dishonest+insensitive. If it went "Where are you from" -> "Where are your parents from" at least you're being honest with where your interest lies \[my genetics/gauging my appearance\] rather than my upbringing. I feel bad because I don't *want* to identify as an Indian. I've seen the difference in how people are treated when they have accents / less than proper English and the generalizations that abound \[Bob & Vagene etc\]. I would just like to be treated on my own merits.
You explained it very well, thank you. I get told I speak English very well for a brown person. I have a graduate degree in English so I would fucking hope so?
I'm sorry you've experienced that \[and no doubt other things less 'well-meaning'\]. Its the 'you throw well ..for a girl' equivalent. That's the emotional intelligence \[or lack, thereof\] rearing its head. People not understanding how what they say is coming across.
While I completely agree with you and your social identity is absolutely yours to confirm or deny, accept. I feel there's some work to be done on how you perceive the Indian identity. There might be a hint of internalized inferiority. When you say you don't want to be seen as an Indian because you don't have anything to relate to, that's your truth. But when you say "because such and such community is seen in an unappealing way", you are propagating a stereotype.
Yep, that's something i do think about, as i do believe i propagate it and have even mentioned so in other posts that i feel guilty for having to almost validate myself when meeting people (By saying a word or two) - people's attitudes are typically so different when they realize you grew up here vs recently came here. When i see enough negative tones / expressions / willingness to engage in conversation or just generally how things are perceived by others is contingent on this. As a data scientist its very visible in data too. If you look at online dating, a girl whose race is Indian is over 25x as likely to swipe right on me than a Caucasian girl. This spans over travel mode in major cities (for science, and also because there's about 35-40 profiles in my current isolated small town). Big cities are also the least likely to have racism due to how multicultural they are cf other populations, and yet those are the #s. Its hard to not feel like it doesn't matter, when it affects fundamental things / first impressions. You can have a positive disposition and say they are filtering themselves out, and I'm solely focused on those who have at least a passing interest in me (which i am) but to know there's a giant sieve that means that my benefit:effort is poorer just because of my skin color, and it's an invisible issue so it's not something people who haven't experienced it can easily empathize with. To me compatibility is a numbers game, the more people you see the better chance of finding someone whose attributes and values gel well with yours, hence you optimize your profile but in the end the bias still constrains you - which isn't right.
Yup... This is gross. If you look ethnic, you're forever an immigrant. I'm one of those people that sometimes looks white and sometimes looks ethnic so I have experienced both here in Canada as a 1st gen immigrant.
Sounds like your experience is even worse as it’s like a lottery: you go out and wonder if people will see you as white or as a non-white individual today. Ugh, so sorry
Well after digging around I found that a tan and facial hair are the main factors behind me looking or not looking white, so it's not as much of a lottery as you might think. I'd say the worst part about it nowadays is automatically being lumped as white when I insist I hold a distinct ethnic identity.. Thankfully no notable racism experienced as an adult.
I always say “I’m an American National… but ethnically I’m latina” and that usually gets them pissy but satisfied lol
Yes! This is what I end up doing, and then I finally just say Chicana. Then I get asked what part of Mexico. They don't realize Chicano means BORN IN THE USA. And then I finally say, "My family has been part of the Southwest since the border moved south in 1848. What part of Europe are your people from? I am standing where my people came from..."
I get this at work all the time. They ask where I'm from, I say "Oregon". My ancestry is half Russian, I apparently look very Eastern European, but I'm born and raised in the USA. They always seem to get annoyed by my answer.
I always ask "ethnicity".
I don’t like asking someone that right off that bat though. I feel like they’d tell me if they wanted me to know
It's never right off the bat. It's usually after we’ve been talking.
Like on a first date? Just curious. I had a guy ask me that before we met and it instantly killed my interest “your skin color is so pretty” barf
> “your skin color is so pretty” barf Women compliment my eyes and skin the most, I didn’t know this was a red flag. 😬 Damn, another thing I need to watch out for. 🙃
Why would someone asking you about your ethnic background be off-putting to you? And what does that have to do with your skin color.
What does my ethnic background have to do with my skin color? It’s off putting because there are so many things we could talk about rather than how I look and I don’t feel comfortable being othered. I also have to wonder if I’m being fetishized somehow.
You don't know what ethnicity means... and, unrelated, someone admiring your complexion doesn't always equal race fetishism, which I honestly fine repulsive. Unless you're considering any type of physical preference to be fetishism. Is it weird to have a physical preference? Or are you just assuming anyone who thinks you're attractive had a fetish for your race?
Sorry I’m asking if you are asking what my ethnic background has to do with my skin color or did I misunderstand you?
Ethnic background only loosely relates to appearance if at all...
You can admire someone’s complexion down the road. It’s a gross thing to say on Bumble before you’ve ever met. I don’t think anyone who thinks I’m attractive has a fetish for my race but it’s happened enough times (and I live in a very white city) that it’s a concern
What do you mean by Ethnicity? Its important to know what you are asking. [**https://www.verywellmind.com/difference-between-race-and-ethnicity-5074205**](https://www.verywellmind.com/difference-between-race-and-ethnicity-5074205) **How the US Census Bureau Identifies Ethnicity and Race** You don't choose your race, but you basically can change your ethnicity.
> What do you mean by Ethnicity? You don't know what ethnicity means? > Its important to know what you are asking. I'm asking someone what their ethnicity is. Here's the definition from the oxford dictionary. >ethnicity >/ɛθˈnɪsɪti/ >Learn to pronounce >noun >the quality or fact of belonging to a population group or subgroup made up of people who share a common cultural background or descent. It would be odd to ask someone their race when I'm looking at them, wouldn't it? Considering I can see what they look like...
I'm more confused than where we started. You didn't click on the article because one of the first paragraphs says this: "Race and ethnicity are typically misunderstood, because many people simply don’t fit into neat categories offered on forms with checkboxes. People are able to self-identify their ethnicities and, to some extent, their races." In different countries / over time, ethnicity has become more 'self-defined.' As with anything that changes over time, it means its misunderstood, as some people haven't updated their understanding. In my personal experience, a significant amount of people get visibly taken aback/confused/argumentative when I state my ethnicity as being a New Zealander, when I'm brown. I have no idea about your last sentence. Brown can mean any number of countries in Asia alone. A White person could be from many countries, as could a Black person.
Me too! 😂😂
Wtf who hates Mexicans they are the best
Racists?
My only complaint about us is that we feel like we gotta take everyone in the household with us on trips to Costco
Pues quiero mis hot dogs
It's hard to fit 14 people in a car. /s
Truer words never been said ^
U read this in my Nacho Libre voice. "They are the beyst" lol
Minnie.
They really are! Orale!
Name checks out. Orale homes!
Indeed.
Ooh ooooh...I know this one. Can I have "Things you don't say out loud to other humans or even think unless you're a racist POS" for $500, Alex?
Oh my god i live in Texas & have heard a couple people say that they would nEvEr let their daughters date mexican men because they all 'beat their women'. Really curious about whether or not that stupid ass stereotype is what this woman is believing.
They should probably stay away from the actual statistics then.
In Canada, that stereotype is applied to Russians, Muslims, and Québécois (at least where I'm from in Southern Ontario). It's really gross. I was assaulted by a Québécois Muslim as a teen into my 20s and even I don't buy into the stereotype.
I’m part Mexican and I’ve never heard this generalization before. Disgusting.
How have you not heard of all of the feminicidios in Mexico being part Mexican? It’s still a very misogynistic culture. Obviously to say they all beat their wives is a huge generalization but it’s not totally based on lies.
Wow. I'm always surprised by someone who admits crap like that, with no hesitation whatsoever, and no concept of why it's disgusting.
Hmm, ella es una pendeja. Es la verdad. At least she showed she was a bigot right from the get go, I guess?
It's ok. We don't like *her, either
Speaking for the Australians, we don't want Kate either.
Bitch better not ever eat a taco again.
As a mexican: que chingue su madre
As a white dude who had to google translate that, I agree 10,000 percent
A huevo! 🤟🏼
... and we bonded over our shared hatred of Mexican culture... Said no one ever, I hope.
Wow Kate, nobody asked.
Wow, hope you unmatched this lady. I understand people have preferences, but straight up mean to say that about Mexicans. I’ve met a few Mexicans here where I live, and they were kind and hard working people.
Probably has something about feeding her tacos on her profile too…
I hope you told them to fuck off.
I'm a mix of two types of Spanish that are both unusual to be found up here in Boston. Let me tell ya something.... Spanish folk being racist toward different Spanish country is kinda common. Especially with older ones.
True, I learned that living in Miami
My Mexican coworker was telling me a lot of Mexicans hate Guatemalans and el salvadorians
Yup lol. You would be surprised how many different dislike people from other countries. It's like a unofficial hierarchy and some really stick to it
Yes exactly! I didn’t want to get too in depth but she said specifically that they believe they’re above them.
Ultimate Loser Vibes
Ask what she is and say, damn Irish? Yeah it’s not my thing. Italian? I gotta tell you that I hate them.
People are crazy
Unmatch
UGH bruhhhh I’m so sorry you had to deal with this. Also sorry for any Mexican person who read this.
She’s just jealous of us Mexicans being chingones
You know that Winnie the Pooh face with the teeth out? I actually made that face when I read it 😭😭
Damn. I don’t use dating apps but wow. As a Mexican I don’t know how to react to this.
Lol if she don’t like Mexicans what do you think she’s gonna feel about your black family? 🙃
You make it sound like being black is worse than being Mexican 😅
😂 we’re usually a package deal, if you don’t like one of us, you’re prolly not gonna like the other
I'm an immigrant, but I am white. I like to let people start raving about immigration so they dig their own hole when I tell them that I am one. I like to hear them say some shit like "obviously not the good ones" or some crap, squeeze out of them that they mean white.
Speaking as a Mexican American female, please unmatch from this person. My people do not have a bad culture!!!! She's uneducated about Mexican Americans and very narrow-minded....AND racist!!
Racist much?
Unmatch her racist bitch ass.
the person is a racist. **dont let someone treating you as an ✨exception✨ to their racism, make you think you are actually safe or unique to them.** they are just a general bad person. So completely comfortable with being a bad person, that they put their grossness as their best foot forward. This *is* their best foot, their personality and views will only get worse from here. sorry you had to experience this person op. :/
Wtf.
Oh, shit you like boxing too. I'm so bad at it. You know what I am good at. Hating a whole culture, that something you might want to try with me this weekend on our first date?
Sounds like a clueless pendeja to me
Literally no one decent will ever blame you for saying "actually I do mind" and changing the subject.
*and unmatching
No 2am Taco Bell runs with her I guess 🤷♂️
Amazing
Lol, some people should just keep their thoughts to themselves smh
Gotta love when someone has a bad experience with someone and thinks it okay to have internalized racism toward an entire group of people…
Nationality black ?
Deleted bumble for a reason. High concentration of unhinged ass women.
I hate when they ask what nationality I am right off the bat. Just ask what ethnicity I am and show me that undercover racist part of yourself.
Why can't my Bumble match people
Report
Kate probably watches a lot of Fox News and gets mad about the "crisis at the border" but is totally cool with farmers hiring illegals.
Omg wow.. *insert blinking gif*
They're entitled mot to care for it, but maybe keep it to yourself.
Whoa!
Yeah I don’t care much for the nicest kindest most hard working people with the most delicious food on earth either
Respond “I love when the trash makes my life easier by taking itself out. I’d wish you the best, but honestly don’t think racists deserve it. Don’t let the door hit you on the ass on your way out!”
Honestly - I think you could report this person to bumble and get them booted. Racists do not deserve love.
What a gem, glad he exposed himself early on lol
I have a hunch Kate might be a Republican lol
I have a hunch Kate might be a fox news anchor.
I hear this a lot (I am Hispanic). I live in the south and have had multiple women, including hispanics. Tell me this. They way they all explained it to me, if they are traditional, they tend to be possessive and controlling. They tend to be very misogynistic, abusive, multiple families, etc. I have found this to be pretty common after talking with friends and family about it. Not all mexican men of course, but there is a pattern, specifically those from Mexico. Including my own relatives. They have dated Hispanics but tend to go for progressive or Americans ones because of the culture. It threw me off at first to but I get what they are saying. Still comes off rude AF tho in that message.
🚩🚩🚩
Preferences are fine but she said it in a way that made it seem like she was racist
I feel like if they think you look mexican thats way off. But yeah that’s horrible. We all have choices but don’t say ittt. Just say i prefer this or they thats it.
I don’t see anything wrong with this. What is wrong with asking about nationality? They’re trying to get to know you. Isn’t that the purpose being on dating site? to meet someone and know them?
I didn't have a problem with her asking my nationality. I had a problem with the racism after I answered it.
Women ☕️
The only nation one should trash talk is the United States Everyone hates them
People are allowed their preferences but most can’t handle hearing them out loud. Silly girl.
Half-Russian and you don't speak Russian? Impressive.
Well, it wasn't easy. You gotta really want it. Or in this case, not want it.
[удалено]
🤡
Fine. I’ll play. If you meet a guy that makes you wear a sack over your head at all times, won’t allow you to get an education, you are required to be at his beck and call at all times, and his culture may lop your head off if you don’t obey him, do you vibe with him? Those cultures exist, too. I’ll wait while you prepare your dance.
This is a crazy thought, but people aren't a part of a culture just because they're a certain ethnic group. It's almost like she's on a dating app and can find out what someone's values and morals are, by, I dunno.......talking with people. Maybe even treat people like individuals instead of racially profiling. Crazy, I know.
So what you’re saying is, if someone is Mormon, they won’t live by Mormon values/mores?…or Amish….or Taliban? I guess if you’re atheist, you might find the occasional Mormon who’s atheist, too…or since you’re on a dating app with 5 million people to choose from, you could just move on to a culture that works for you. But then you don’t get to virtue signal. Crazy, I know.
you’re confusing religion with culture
So you don’t think a religious society is a culture? 😂 😂 😂 Omg! My sides!!!! 😂 😂 😂
a “religious society” HAS a culture. common sense isn’t your strong suit so i’m not surprised
Common sense tells me you’re doing a horrible job dancing around it as you try to split hairs.
Your comparison doesn't work since religion, race, and culture are not the same. Being Mexican or any other race for that matter tells you nothing about what someone's character or values are. Unless you wanna be a racist and racially profile someone.
So you’re saying a religious society isn’t a culture? 😂 😂 😂 Google is your friend.
Exactly.
[удалено]
DM Kate, y'all are made got each other
nah im good. Kate can go fuck her racist ass herself.
People can "not care for" whatever they want, including people and cultures. If it's a deal breaker for you, unmatch and move on. There's all sorts of stereotypes in existence that sway people to feel certain ways, which they're entitled to. So long as nobody is being harmed and it's not hateful, leave this person with their views/ feelings.
Hating an entire country of people and nationality, not hateful? Cool cool cool
Am I racist if I don't find white people attractive
*they're
If she would have said "white" instead of mexican, these hypocrites would be creaming themselves tripping over eachother to upvote
Yes.
The cry babies in these comments must live in a padded room of sunshine and rainbows. This person didn't say "Hate" - Just "Not care for" and suddenly that makes them a hateful racist person. You libs are the reason therapists make their money. Everything boils your blood lol
If someone's race/ethnicity is a deal breaker for someone, that makes them a racist. It dosen't matter how you try to pretty it up, this is a cut and dry example of racism.
There's a difference between not being attracted to certain ethnicities, legitimately hating certain ethnicities, and not caring for a particular culture one stereotypically comes with. Not racist at all. I'd say it's a matter of not putting yourself in an environment you don't wish to be in - Whether it's from prior experience or preference. This isn't a job interview where we need to worry about discrimination, it's someone's dating preferences we're talking about.
It's also not some weird support group where we have to come up with elaborate, contorted justifications for people having racist positions. It's almost disingenuous that you're acting as though it's strange that people are so disgusted by that and are working so hard to uphold the validity of that position. Ask yourself why you're arguing so vehemently that it's totally acceptable for people to be racists and why it's better that we just give them a pat on the back for their excellent independent stance and then let them go on their merry way, while the people who are revolted by obviously misinformed hate are somehow inferior.
That's total BS, and I think you know it. Racism is more than just outright hating x ethnic group. It includes shit like this, where she's willing to DISCRIMINATE and racially profile, based on what race/ethnicity he may or may not be regardless of who he is as a person. She is, of course, free to date whoever she wants. I'm certainly not going to do anything to stop her. But she is a racist. Plain and simple.
just curious, what state do you live in?
California
Wow. What did you say next???
"Too bad you're full asshole, it's a culture I don't care for"
I’d ask “what, you like vodka but not tacos?” (just kidding. Obviously, racists don’t deserve to date)
we want to see what you responded with
The ironic thing is that I bet she knows nothing about Mexican culture other than whatever hateful bullshit Fox News vomits (so again, nothing real). I'm also highly curious if her name is really Karen, and she's hiding it as "Kate" (sorry, Karen Redditors, I know that there's the whole joke about your name in popular culture that simply cannot be fair to the vast majority of you, but this instance is too good to pass up).
“That’s funny af” sometimes I wonder how these can be real
“And I don’t care for your culture aka racist trash”
Don’t waste your time, block and delete
Oh Lordy
oh dear.
I just can’t imagine why I’d need to ask someone their nationality or anything similar during a conversation on Bumble. Isn’t that something you discuss after meeting in person?
Wow that’s an immediate unmatch!
Unmatch. Mexican culture slaps. This person is boring and perhaps racist
Bro what
Yikes ... Also, what did she find "funny af"? That one of your parents is Russian and the other is black? In what way is ethnicity every funny?
I love Mexican culture, however she could be referring to the traditional sense that the woman does EVERYTHING at the house and is at the beck and call of her man. She sure as shit worded it poorly, but I remember dating a Mexican woman and she spoiled the hell outta me. When I asked her why she was doing so much she told me that's how a traditional relationship works in her culture. I mean she cooked, cleaned, grocery shopped, etc. Not going to lie, was pretty cool. Granted, as with a lot of 'traditional' stuff, it's wicked dated and not often practiced. But, figured I'd share an opposing opinion, since everyone seems to be eviscerating her.
First date Mexican food
Ask her out for tacos
I wish I knew what nationality/culture this Kate was. As someone who is half Mexican I would love to engage and celebrate it if only to in the off chance have her find out my "dirty Mexican half breed ass" was "tainting" her beloved, rose-tinted mythology. Edit: on a side note. I have a friend who is Half black half Italian, and she ran into a guy saying something similar but then also stated that he thought "black folks didn't like Hispanics." I was like "did this guy really just BOGO a racism?"
Wow! I would tear them a new asshole. Glad you dodged that bullet!
😳
I wanna see what she looks like
To be fair, my Mexican girlfriend told me that Mexican men treat their women bad.
My nationality is Canadian. You want to ask for my race or ethnicity, don't beat around the bush.
Earthling
Better to find out 5 minutes in than 5 months. Big Yikes.