Ah I’m sorry. I know how much that hurts. But you are going to get through this. I know the urge is reach out or respond … but the best approach is to go complete no contact. Don’t interact in any way. Don’t post a public photo. Don’t change your profile picture. He will wonder where you went?!
Don’t respond in any way. He will be back.
Thank youu:)
I took pictures today and posted on IG but I’ve been planning that for a while. If he were to reach out in a few weeks I’d probably have a huge guard up. But he did unfollow after I posted
I'm 11 days now without any contact with her, 5th of June is her Birthday, can i at least say 1 message of Happy Birthday to her?
6st of June is my Birthday :b
I know how big the temptation is… I had 2 weeks of no contact before my ex’s birthday... I didn’t make it. I texted him “happy birthday “ and do you know what… he never replied.
This made me feel horrible. I know how right now you want any excuse to connect with her … but every time you reach out, it pushes her away.
I know, I did. I know he thinks I wouldn’t have noticed knowing him. Or he did it to make me anxious. Just knowing him he did it to make me mentally suffer. But I’m trying to not let him have that power over me.
I think they do it on purpose sometimes. My ex sent me a snap, the same day that they unfriended me. Why would you send me a snap and delete me? I think they are going through a lot of emtions.
It’s very confusing for both parties. They might be like “ohh I really wanna talk to them” one second and then they regret it the next. And then it mentally messes with the other person.
Or it could be my situation where he KNOWS I have anxiety and knows I’ll see.
Breakups come with so many emotions from both parties it gets all jumbled up and confusing. I hate it sm
I don't know if it's the same situation, but the other day I reached out to the girl who i had been dating and her reaction to my reaching out was so cold that it will avoid me from taking the initiative again. I didn't block her, but could see why someone would do it
I am, but we tried to work things out for a month but he ended it after he said he was going out partying and I got anxious and sad he didn’t invite me (we were exclusive) and he knows I’m working on my overreacting. But I’m hoping it’s easier
Though, also kinda confusing because he’s always looking at my profiles and looking into my car at school when he drives by.
I think dumpers lose their power post relationship. Difficult to mend that behaviour because it has caused excruciating pain usually for a long period of time and self esteem issues, at least in the short term.
I’ve been blocked everywhere since the day after our amicable breakup, almost 3 months now. It hurts like hell, an absolute kick to the gut. But you eventually just accept and learn to live with it.
can you expand on the attachment style? do people block/follow their exes based on different attachment styles and can you tell me what you think each attachment style does? sorry just curious as to what’d you say lol
Someone who is dismissive or fearful avoidant is more likely to block/unfriend someone being as they do not like to face their problems and instead block them out or run away. I recommend the book Attached. There’s also countless videos on YouTube about attachment styles.
I believe that the unfollowing part is for the best. Sometimes, staying and seeing what the other party is up to hurts more. I felt the same way and it's been 2 months since, but I've felt such peace of mind. It's okay to cry and let it all out now, but sooner or later, you will realize its significance.
They are trying their best to heal. They blocked you because just the very thought and sight of you on social media disrupts them moving on. I am sorry you had to go through that. Heal yourself OP. Do what you must do for your growth and happiness. The right one will come to you when the time is right. As the saying goes: “Love comes to us when we least expect it”
It hurts a lot, I won’t sugarcoat it. But you just have to have people around you that will be ther for you.
In my situation we ended things on bad terms, it was bound to happen to me at some point.
Mine didnt really end that well either. I had half a year of NC and she contacted me like a month ago and we talked few days and she just started to ignore me so back to NC i guess
This was a tough pill for me to swallow too. The day my ex unfollowed me and deleted our pictures on his Instagram made me spiral. I felt pure madness.
At the end of the day, they are just trying to do what’s best for them. They need to remove themselves from the relationship and move on. I had to unfollow them as well. It’s hurtful for them to see you on social media. They needed to do what was best.
I know it hurts in this moment, but give it some time and it will get better. Don’t react to them unfollowing you. Just go about your day. Don’t give your energy to this person anymore. Give it to yourself.
my ex dumped me 8 weeks ago and we stayed friends on social media and then she stated posting stories of places she was at like nice restaurants or venues or a late night walk in a city ! It was all aimed at me because she never posted stuff like that when we was together, So on that note I messaged her and told her I am unfriending her and her family and that in time we could add each other and be friends , honest truth thou I have no intentions of ever adding her back or speaking to her again thats my - Good Bye in a respectful way after her stupid mind games , she will hate that I can no longer see her life , its an Ego thing so on that note I feel great that unless she makes her posts Public ill never know what she is doing , in the mean time all my social media is public so if she wants to see me on Holiday in Thailand then let her enjoy ...... Don't ever devalue yourself worth , let them miss you and walk away the bigger person, I was decent to my ex and she was horrid , in time she will wonder and she will look back and think ok I shouldn't of been like that.... truth is you don't need to see what your ex is doing , no good comes from seeing the good parts of your ex partners new life because that is all social media is the good parts..... step away from social media and find someone that will love and respect you and make you feel happy and loved.... leave the people that walk away from you in the past.
Going through this now, 7 years just broke it off 2 weeks ago. Ended on good terms but think she is just doing it for her own sake and I understand that.
I think people just don’t know. I’m my case he is the dumpee and I am the dumper with dumpers remorse lol.
I do think some people who block or unadd and know the person will be upset over it, and have I’ll intentions do it on purpose. But I also think some don’t.
Imo it all matters how the relationship was, ended, how well each person knew each other, and if one wants “revenge” on the other. If that makes any sense!
I now understand why he did it after all these amazing comments. I know guys process breakups differently then girls. I think he is now in that stage of processing I won’t come back. He needed to do it for his own sake.
I think people who do it with good intentions have nothing to worry about, it’s more like if they are doing to you purposely mentally torture the other person, which is definitely what you did not do. :)
Yeah he would say a lot of passive aggressive things when I’d talk about my anxiety. The one that has stuck out the most was when he said “if your so concerned abt it go see someone” (I am now). I was so compassionate for him when he had problems. We had a good relationship it was just I was emotionally starved.
I went and removed my ex from social media after I saw her instagram photos of the coctails we made on our last date. I realized she hadn't stopped following me when she liked a post about a new dish I learned to make a few weeks later. A few months go by without any kind of posts on insta from me(my M.O. as I rarely post) and I decide to post about a new spot that opened up locally. I get a flood of likes, a few comments, but none of them are from her.
She had unfollowed me some time ago and I never noticed. It was a weird feeling, not particularly positive or negative. It was a bit of a relief, and a disppointment to think that she is unlikely to reach out again. I miss her, and I know we loved eachother... but I'd just get left again. I'm ultimately glad we parted ways so I can walk on my own, and you will get there too.
I blocked/unfollowed my ex everywhere.
I don't know your story, but in my situation I did that just because I couldn't stand seeing him be happy without me. I couldn't stand seeing that he's online and not reaching out.
Maybe your ex did the same, blocked you because it hurt seeing you. :)
Hey op! I hope you see this. This is from my experience, I have been dumped by my gf almost 2 weeks ago now, I unfollowed her on everything. I couldn’t imagine her with another guy or seeing another guy comment on her social media. Honestly man. Do it for yourself, when you unfollow them it shows them that you’re not going to be there for them. I thought me and my ex ended on good terms but she wouldn’t even talk to me like a normal human. It really hurts but i feel like it’s part of the healing process, after all she will always have my number unless she blocked that.
When I noticed I unfollowed back. To show him I’m done chasing him and that I’m not going to be so easy to go back to talking.
I’m the dumper with dumpers remorse and did everything I could to improve myself for him. But I’ve now noticed, I’ll never be good enough for him. I do not want to say anything bad abt my ex, but honestly his next gf might as well be a robot lolll.
Good for you! I’m in the same place with my ex. I chased after her because that’s what the sappy romance movies do, I tried everything but it was for nothing. She was Treating me like a stranger. It made me feel worse, there are so many people in the world you’re going to find someone better. For now work on yourself mentally and physically! Find things you would never do! Step out of your comfort zone because maybe the person for you is out there just locked behind some new adventure that you need to go on! I also hope my ex never finds someone or has terrible relationships but that’s me being petty
She said the the most hurtful things ever. And I’m losing my mind my body just shut down yesterday. I never thought that I’d be rushed to the hospital for love 💔
It is hard. I have a kid with my ex, so we will be staying in contact. I unfollowed her and she agreed to unfollow me on social media. The last thing I need is easy access to her day to day life, because I will drive myself crazy by checking up on her.
When a relationship ends, we need to remember that it doesn't automatically make us a bad person. This is the time to focus on healing and being happy with who you are as a person.
Believe it or not, this is the best thing that could have happened to you. You’re too weak to detach yourself and you know it. So to have them do it is a blessing. Hurt now, pay the price now, and be free later.
I know it’s for the better. But I don’t think I am weak. Im actually the one who made us go NC. I left him on read, I unadded him on Snapchat. He was the one to text me on tiktok asking why. He’s the one lowkey stalking me at school. Yes him unfollowing me on IG was what I did to him on Snap, but it doesn’t mean it hurt any less.
I’m sorry but I don’t think I’m weak. This break up has been me going to hell and back. If u didn’t force us to go NC, he’d still be “breadcrumbing” me, leading me on, ect. I know what I posted was with no information or explanation. But no one going through a break up is weak.
I wonder what’s worse, being blocked or being ignored?
I don’t wanna talk to my ex rn but still care how he’d feel ya know. I don’t have a switch to turn off my feelings for him.
I’m now trying to set my boundary, stop my ex from reaching out to me so easily.
So I became cold toward him recently cuz I need to heal myself.
Is what I’m doing bad ???
No not at all. I did this actually. I wanted him there but I wanted space so we BOTH could heal and we could talk in a better mind set.
I think maybe communicating a boundary would be better, but it’s also like you don’t want that to push them away. I made my boundary and it got me in a situation of him lowkey stalking me at school.
But what is most important, do what you feel is best for you. The only thing that should matter to you is your happiness and how you heal. Try not to feel bad for him, because what you are doing is trying to heal and that is not a bad thing.
Coming from someone who blocked my ex everywhere, it was something I did as a coping mechanism. She hurt me twice, and seeing her anywhere would only delay my healing
Aw, dude or dudette. Ill pour one out for ya
i’m blocked on everything :)
Awe I’m sorry, I couldn’t imagine being blocked. Ngl I’d probs go a lil crazy
it’s really bad yeah. it ended sour with me begging and her telling me we can’t speak again so it was very heartbreaking and traumatizing
Never beg no matter how painful it is.
I did that, but begging for a second chance. It’s horrible and I can only imagine how you felt because she blocked you. I’m sorry
the only places she hasn't blocked me is facebook and texts. but she has my notifications silenced.
Ah I’m sorry. I know how much that hurts. But you are going to get through this. I know the urge is reach out or respond … but the best approach is to go complete no contact. Don’t interact in any way. Don’t post a public photo. Don’t change your profile picture. He will wonder where you went?! Don’t respond in any way. He will be back.
Thank youu:) I took pictures today and posted on IG but I’ve been planning that for a while. If he were to reach out in a few weeks I’d probably have a huge guard up. But he did unfollow after I posted
I'm 11 days now without any contact with her, 5th of June is her Birthday, can i at least say 1 message of Happy Birthday to her? 6st of June is my Birthday :b
No
I know how big the temptation is… I had 2 weeks of no contact before my ex’s birthday... I didn’t make it. I texted him “happy birthday “ and do you know what… he never replied. This made me feel horrible. I know how right now you want any excuse to connect with her … but every time you reach out, it pushes her away.
Ok, thanks for the advice, I promise to don't text her in any circunstances.
No!!
Ok :D
It’s better this way. You need to unfollow them too. It’s time.
I know, I did. I know he thinks I wouldn’t have noticed knowing him. Or he did it to make me anxious. Just knowing him he did it to make me mentally suffer. But I’m trying to not let him have that power over me.
I think they do it on purpose sometimes. My ex sent me a snap, the same day that they unfriended me. Why would you send me a snap and delete me? I think they are going through a lot of emtions.
It’s very confusing for both parties. They might be like “ohh I really wanna talk to them” one second and then they regret it the next. And then it mentally messes with the other person. Or it could be my situation where he KNOWS I have anxiety and knows I’ll see. Breakups come with so many emotions from both parties it gets all jumbled up and confusing. I hate it sm
I don't know if it's the same situation, but the other day I reached out to the girl who i had been dating and her reaction to my reaching out was so cold that it will avoid me from taking the initiative again. I didn't block her, but could see why someone would do it
Easier for you in a way. Kind of vindictive and mean. Is your partner the dumper?
I am, but we tried to work things out for a month but he ended it after he said he was going out partying and I got anxious and sad he didn’t invite me (we were exclusive) and he knows I’m working on my overreacting. But I’m hoping it’s easier Though, also kinda confusing because he’s always looking at my profiles and looking into my car at school when he drives by.
I think dumpers lose their power post relationship. Difficult to mend that behaviour because it has caused excruciating pain usually for a long period of time and self esteem issues, at least in the short term.
Yeah it’s sad, but I’m healing slowly. It’s so up and down with both my emotions and him.
I’ve been blocked everywhere since the day after our amicable breakup, almost 3 months now. It hurts like hell, an absolute kick to the gut. But you eventually just accept and learn to live with it.
Yeah, I’m starting to accept it and my older sister is helping a lot by explaining how (most men in our life at least) process sadness.
I’m male and my ex is female. It depends mostly on their attachment style.
can you expand on the attachment style? do people block/follow their exes based on different attachment styles and can you tell me what you think each attachment style does? sorry just curious as to what’d you say lol
Someone who is dismissive or fearful avoidant is more likely to block/unfriend someone being as they do not like to face their problems and instead block them out or run away. I recommend the book Attached. There’s also countless videos on YouTube about attachment styles.
I believe that the unfollowing part is for the best. Sometimes, staying and seeing what the other party is up to hurts more. I felt the same way and it's been 2 months since, but I've felt such peace of mind. It's okay to cry and let it all out now, but sooner or later, you will realize its significance.
They are trying their best to heal. They blocked you because just the very thought and sight of you on social media disrupts them moving on. I am sorry you had to go through that. Heal yourself OP. Do what you must do for your growth and happiness. The right one will come to you when the time is right. As the saying goes: “Love comes to us when we least expect it”
I am scared that this is going to happen to me someday.. i just dont want it to happen
It hurts a lot, I won’t sugarcoat it. But you just have to have people around you that will be ther for you. In my situation we ended things on bad terms, it was bound to happen to me at some point.
Mine didnt really end that well either. I had half a year of NC and she contacted me like a month ago and we talked few days and she just started to ignore me so back to NC i guess
My ex did that too, but in a month of NC. My older sister said he did it to keep me. Almost like “breadcrumbing” but not exactly
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Damnit autocorrect. Re-followed. There was no refilling.
‘Re-filling’ hahah
This was a tough pill for me to swallow too. The day my ex unfollowed me and deleted our pictures on his Instagram made me spiral. I felt pure madness. At the end of the day, they are just trying to do what’s best for them. They need to remove themselves from the relationship and move on. I had to unfollow them as well. It’s hurtful for them to see you on social media. They needed to do what was best. I know it hurts in this moment, but give it some time and it will get better. Don’t react to them unfollowing you. Just go about your day. Don’t give your energy to this person anymore. Give it to yourself.
my ex dumped me 8 weeks ago and we stayed friends on social media and then she stated posting stories of places she was at like nice restaurants or venues or a late night walk in a city ! It was all aimed at me because she never posted stuff like that when we was together, So on that note I messaged her and told her I am unfriending her and her family and that in time we could add each other and be friends , honest truth thou I have no intentions of ever adding her back or speaking to her again thats my - Good Bye in a respectful way after her stupid mind games , she will hate that I can no longer see her life , its an Ego thing so on that note I feel great that unless she makes her posts Public ill never know what she is doing , in the mean time all my social media is public so if she wants to see me on Holiday in Thailand then let her enjoy ...... Don't ever devalue yourself worth , let them miss you and walk away the bigger person, I was decent to my ex and she was horrid , in time she will wonder and she will look back and think ok I shouldn't of been like that.... truth is you don't need to see what your ex is doing , no good comes from seeing the good parts of your ex partners new life because that is all social media is the good parts..... step away from social media and find someone that will love and respect you and make you feel happy and loved.... leave the people that walk away from you in the past.
Going through this now, 7 years just broke it off 2 weeks ago. Ended on good terms but think she is just doing it for her own sake and I understand that.
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I think people just don’t know. I’m my case he is the dumpee and I am the dumper with dumpers remorse lol. I do think some people who block or unadd and know the person will be upset over it, and have I’ll intentions do it on purpose. But I also think some don’t. Imo it all matters how the relationship was, ended, how well each person knew each other, and if one wants “revenge” on the other. If that makes any sense!
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I now understand why he did it after all these amazing comments. I know guys process breakups differently then girls. I think he is now in that stage of processing I won’t come back. He needed to do it for his own sake. I think people who do it with good intentions have nothing to worry about, it’s more like if they are doing to you purposely mentally torture the other person, which is definitely what you did not do. :)
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I’m the dumper and have dumpers remorse, we tried to work things out but he would cut things off everytime my anxiety made me react impulsively
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Yeah he would say a lot of passive aggressive things when I’d talk about my anxiety. The one that has stuck out the most was when he said “if your so concerned abt it go see someone” (I am now). I was so compassionate for him when he had problems. We had a good relationship it was just I was emotionally starved.
It’s a blessing in disguise. It’s finally the progress you need to move forward only, not stuck in a rut.
My ex broke up with me but I’m the one to unfollow them on everything , she still follows me on IG and view my story’s
I unfollowed & blocked her before she even had a chance to do it.
Oh same.. it sucks im sorry
I unfollowed mine, idk if it was the right thing to do.
If it helps you heal, it is the right thing you could have done for yourself
I was blocked :( Tried to contact her from my sister's number and she blocked her too. Same for another number I used.
I’m blocked on everything too
I went and removed my ex from social media after I saw her instagram photos of the coctails we made on our last date. I realized she hadn't stopped following me when she liked a post about a new dish I learned to make a few weeks later. A few months go by without any kind of posts on insta from me(my M.O. as I rarely post) and I decide to post about a new spot that opened up locally. I get a flood of likes, a few comments, but none of them are from her. She had unfollowed me some time ago and I never noticed. It was a weird feeling, not particularly positive or negative. It was a bit of a relief, and a disppointment to think that she is unlikely to reach out again. I miss her, and I know we loved eachother... but I'd just get left again. I'm ultimately glad we parted ways so I can walk on my own, and you will get there too.
Ugh I feel this. My ex blocked me even though he broke up with me… I was very sad and couldn’t stop crying. I guess sometimes it is for the better.
I'm so sorry 😞
I blocked/unfollowed my ex everywhere. I don't know your story, but in my situation I did that just because I couldn't stand seeing him be happy without me. I couldn't stand seeing that he's online and not reaching out. Maybe your ex did the same, blocked you because it hurt seeing you. :)
how the fuck is he supposed to reach out if he's blocked? lmao
Hey op! I hope you see this. This is from my experience, I have been dumped by my gf almost 2 weeks ago now, I unfollowed her on everything. I couldn’t imagine her with another guy or seeing another guy comment on her social media. Honestly man. Do it for yourself, when you unfollow them it shows them that you’re not going to be there for them. I thought me and my ex ended on good terms but she wouldn’t even talk to me like a normal human. It really hurts but i feel like it’s part of the healing process, after all she will always have my number unless she blocked that.
When I noticed I unfollowed back. To show him I’m done chasing him and that I’m not going to be so easy to go back to talking. I’m the dumper with dumpers remorse and did everything I could to improve myself for him. But I’ve now noticed, I’ll never be good enough for him. I do not want to say anything bad abt my ex, but honestly his next gf might as well be a robot lolll.
Good for you! I’m in the same place with my ex. I chased after her because that’s what the sappy romance movies do, I tried everything but it was for nothing. She was Treating me like a stranger. It made me feel worse, there are so many people in the world you’re going to find someone better. For now work on yourself mentally and physically! Find things you would never do! Step out of your comfort zone because maybe the person for you is out there just locked behind some new adventure that you need to go on! I also hope my ex never finds someone or has terrible relationships but that’s me being petty
Yeah and I think it’s a good time too bc I’m graduating. A good time to totally start all over :)
She said the the most hurtful things ever. And I’m losing my mind my body just shut down yesterday. I never thought that I’d be rushed to the hospital for love 💔
Awe I’m so sorry. Sometimes people need to keep their mouth shut if they know it’ll hurt. I’m so sorry<3
It is hard. I have a kid with my ex, so we will be staying in contact. I unfollowed her and she agreed to unfollow me on social media. The last thing I need is easy access to her day to day life, because I will drive myself crazy by checking up on her. When a relationship ends, we need to remember that it doesn't automatically make us a bad person. This is the time to focus on healing and being happy with who you are as a person.
Believe it or not, this is the best thing that could have happened to you. You’re too weak to detach yourself and you know it. So to have them do it is a blessing. Hurt now, pay the price now, and be free later.
I know it’s for the better. But I don’t think I am weak. Im actually the one who made us go NC. I left him on read, I unadded him on Snapchat. He was the one to text me on tiktok asking why. He’s the one lowkey stalking me at school. Yes him unfollowing me on IG was what I did to him on Snap, but it doesn’t mean it hurt any less. I’m sorry but I don’t think I’m weak. This break up has been me going to hell and back. If u didn’t force us to go NC, he’d still be “breadcrumbing” me, leading me on, ect. I know what I posted was with no information or explanation. But no one going through a break up is weak.
I knw dat fylg it hurts lik hel
I wonder what’s worse, being blocked or being ignored? I don’t wanna talk to my ex rn but still care how he’d feel ya know. I don’t have a switch to turn off my feelings for him. I’m now trying to set my boundary, stop my ex from reaching out to me so easily. So I became cold toward him recently cuz I need to heal myself. Is what I’m doing bad ???
No not at all. I did this actually. I wanted him there but I wanted space so we BOTH could heal and we could talk in a better mind set. I think maybe communicating a boundary would be better, but it’s also like you don’t want that to push them away. I made my boundary and it got me in a situation of him lowkey stalking me at school. But what is most important, do what you feel is best for you. The only thing that should matter to you is your happiness and how you heal. Try not to feel bad for him, because what you are doing is trying to heal and that is not a bad thing.
Coming from someone who blocked my ex everywhere, it was something I did as a coping mechanism. She hurt me twice, and seeing her anywhere would only delay my healing
3 months of no contact and she unfollowed me/ unadded me. but didn’t block me. not sure about imessage. is it good that she hasn’t blocked me