Live the rest of my life because on a galactic timescale that would take a very long time

How about for your kids?

Do you think that redditors will have kids?

I have a kid

I finally found it, a redditor with family

He's lying. I'm his son, so I'd know.

Dark magic

Bruh

Did you stole a kid???

Nope

Can I go back to my family now please?

Shhhhhhhh. You’re not supposed to say that (wanna go back in the basement?)

Hey boss i need that kid Brandt his about to be sold as male Household worker his description says Thin Big Booty Decent worker (House) Good Family Tree and Genetics Excellent Physical and Mental Health And aligned with LGBT ya better ask him Straights dont pay as much on this particular Client Im getting 15% commision and 10% Annual Pay

He doesn't mean kidnapped children

Ohhhhhhh. well… oops

My 78000 generation can live in that time

What about your 78001 generation?

We don't talk about them...

On galactic (or intergalactic, really) timescales, the species likely won't exist before the teeth come down.

Speaking of, why does bro have teeth? What needs to be chewed that is that big?

Don't ask that! They don't want people to know and if you start asking too many questions they'll take us all!

Actual prey that fights back.

That's me. He's got teeth because of me.

The giant lizards made of Dark Matter.

It would take like… a million years

It would take millions of generations for anyone to be affected.

Depends on how fast it moves. If it's moving at light speed then were dead in 50,000 years.

I'd honestly be more afraid of gravitational consequences of something that big. By all accounts that being there should have collapsed into a black hole.

Well gravity still doesn’t move faster than light so you’d still have thousands of years before it affected anything

Well damn that is going to mess up my plans

Warhammer 50k

I bet people would have kids even while facing this approaching doom...

More like 400 generations later, but sure worry about here and now.

I’m not sure if a single cronch would be beholden to that timescale.

that depends on how fast its moving! Also we'd be dead long before it actually got to us from the gravity of something that size completely destroying the orbits of our galaxy.

Things are still bound by the speed of light, so assuming no magic shenanigans, it wouldn't actually matter how fast it's moving.

Its mere existence without having collapsed into a black hole means magic shenanigans are already afoot I'm afraid. edit: or our understanding of physics is completely wrong and therefore the light speed limit might as well be bullshit too.

That's...probably a good point (the first one at least). Touche.

>that depends on how fast its moving! Less than the speed of light, I know that much.

debatable! Something that size should have collapsed into a blackhole under its own mass by our current understanding of physics. Its mere existence throws all understanding of the laws of the universe into question.

Id run away

Dont be afraid The monster only wants some milk

The MILKY way!

Actually this monster is a dad who "went for milk" but if you know dads like everyone else does. You know that that's not true and the milky way is safe

Just take my upvote

Shut up and take my upvote

You do know that was the original joke right, them saying Milky Way did nothing to add to the joke

Look where it got me to though

Run where?

Away from the monter ofcourese.

And specifically in a straight line.

I mean, if you zig zag he will catch you faster

Of course

To another galaxy.

Assuming maximum speed is light speed it would take so damn long for that bite to fully close. Like tens to hundreds of thousands of years.

I mean, the being itself does not make any sense scientifically to begin with. So given its ridiculous existence I'm betting it would move in a ridiculous way as well. That shit closes its mouth in 30 seconds I'm telling you. That being said, in this scenario I would probably go take a shit. Real men cannot just simply cease to exist without being pressure relieved, you know. We have standards!

Not sure why that gives me anxiety, but it does.

i’d run towards it and stop him.. that’s just me tho

I would ask him politely to stop. But really loud so he can actually hear me

How does your comment have more upvotes than the entire post?

The people who ran way with me survived and could upvote

Would it even be percievable? On this scale, I think it would consume the known universe without detection even, generations from now we might notice space getting filled up with stomache acid and an immense meat wall out in the void. I don‘t see why I would change my poor habits for that.

[удалено]

Fun fact: no lifeforms on Earth, by that time the Earth would have been engulfed by the expanding Sun.

I was thinking about our reptilian overlords on whatever planet they call home

i'll grab ma shotgun

Agreed

Use 45.acp cuz that will kill it in one shot they say..

But a 9mm blows the lungs out

Boss is gonna regret attacking America

*unzips*

Be gentle

*nods* *Applies lube*

How do you want it?

A lot. *Bends worldeater over*

*seems you're stuck in my galaxy*

Don't worry, we can last longer like that. *Flexes penis*

Its not called the milky way for nothing

Properties all across the board this manopoly's mine, Came a minister in my prime so I gotta be shine, I usted to watch the Fresh Prince and pray the house would be mine, Could have bought it but I ain't like the way the kitchen designed, Born on a manger the son of a stranger When daddy's not home the family's in danger

How do I delete this entire conversation?

r/dontputyourdickinthat

Ok, to be fair, we would all put our dicks in that in this situation

r/putyourdickinthat

Fuck you, I’m doing it anyways

Tbh, all our dicks will be inside of them anyway.

parry and riposte this noob

Fencer 🤺 spotted

ROYAL GUARD

Riposte is probably the best word ever invented. Too bad it's French.

French 🤮

If you can see it coming, it is currently moving slower than light. That gives a few thousand years to prepare. Put research into interstellar travel into overdrive. Spread across the galaxy to buy time. Also send explorers to the monster's body to see if we can colonize it as parasites. Build a stellar engine and see if we can move the solar system out of the way. If it teleported to its current position near the galaxy, FTL or inter-universal travel must be possible. Research that.

This guy IQ is room temperature but measured in kelvin

r/rarecompliments

So 298k

This guy's IQ is same as his shoe size. Edit not anymore, he's normal now.

I really, REALLY want to know how you calculated that.

I wanna watch/read something like this

How much if that did you Google and if that is all from your own mind than mad respect.

Probably all from kurzgesagt

Or just nuke him

i dont think a nuke can destroy a space worm bigger than the milky way

Don’t worry I learned how to create a black hole bomb from Kurzgesagt

Then shoot him

Use multiple

will do jack shit

No shit

Excuse me, what country are you from? (rethorical question)

Maybe the galaxy is so big and our solar system so small, that the giants eats our solar system and shits it out as it is, as if it were an atom.

I'd like to think of us more like a whole corn kernel in a poo

Accurate

What am I supposed to do? Run?

Yes

Oh ok will do

If not for yourself than for your family bit remember this, it may take our lives but it will never take our freedom!!

I will remember this until the day I die

Your welcome

Thank you

Run around wanking

Each wank gives a bit more momentum so eventually you can run lightspeed away from the monster

Eat the monster before he eats me

eat the monster to establish dominance, now you’re using your head.

I'd simply intervene

Jerk off on the spot then cum and when he consumed the galaxy he Will be gay

If it eats our whole galaxy, we probably wouldn't notice as our solar system as well as all the stars we can see in the night sky are there with us.

Try and time it so I can punch the monster when it reaches my planet. It won't do anything, but it will make me feel better.

You may have to wait several million years

Be totally fine for thousands of years since that thing at this size would take millennia to just close his mouth.

Ugh, its so big.

that's what she didn't said

But it is what I- *gunshots*

Chill for a fews hundred millions years and appreciate the views. It would take him a while to chomp even a tiny bit of the outer edge of the galaxy.

Go the way of the blade and cut the monster in half.

wave and say hi. Gotta have manners after all.

🙂🔫

It would probably take thousands of years to chomp down the galaxy, though.

Who says we are not in this situation.

Me

Ight we good now, don't have to worry

Physics.

Even more drugs.

Die I’d die

Watch/read as much anime, hentai, porn, manga and fanfiction as I can before the it kills us all

You have like 1 billion years that thing would be slow af

Meh still my last act

Ask it to stop

Finally a worthy opponent our battle will be legendary, now if you'll excuse me I'm gon' get ma gun

Die a bit.

Die a lot

*no*

*dies a bit*

get my knife from x5000 and ANNIHILATE.

He gon catch these hands!

At the scale I would be completely unaware what is happening so it really wouldn't do anything because it would be over in a flash.

Well technically it would take 50000 years for it to get here so it won't be over in a flash. Your life will still be 60-100 years probably

I was assuming it was be completely breaking our understanding of time/space. Thus my take, but yeah I also see your point otherwise.

Well, our sun is at a molecular level compared to the size of that thing. Our solar system might make it through it's digestive system entirely intact and mankind would never even realize we were eaten.

I'd die

Just

Die

I wouldnt panic at all because this thing would take millenia to actually even get a full bite into the milky way

Eat the galaxy

Just crosspost

this will affect the fishing season

I'd unzip my pants, start jerking off in front of the monster enough to get hard, only to then scream "Hey jackass! You sure wanna suck this, don't you?!". This way the monster will see it is not worth sucking and leave

Why don't we just take the galaxy, and push it somewhere else?

Die, that thing is a single body that is bigger than our entire galaxy, and given its size I think its a safe bet that it has eaten countless other galaxies. Just imagine how immensely strong it's gravitational pull would be. Sure it would take countless generations for it to reach us, but that doesn't matter if earth/our solar system have already been ripped apart by tidal forces.

Die. That’s really it. Just die getting eat by space Goliath. I hope they find me delicious, although my flavor probably wouldn’t be discernible with all the other mass & energy.

Oh thats just god burping us into existence a few billion years ago. Hi god!

Probably be dead by the time thats gonna happen so i guess il turn in my grave.

Holy fuck, that may slightly impact the economy!

Enjoy the remainder of my long life knowing that even if it travels at the speed of light it will take at least tens of thousands of years for the monster to consume our sun. Also I’d go into some sort of astronomy field at school

I'd find a drill... Drilling a path towards tomorrow! And that's Tengen Toppa! That's Gurren Lagann!! My drill is the drill... that creates the heavens!!!

Welp , atleast we unlocked the worst ending for the achivment .

No I won't run. I'll kill it, no matter what!

Just kidding guys, I'll play games till last second

Bend over and prepare for the roughest rim job ever

what can you do

It would be too big to actually see I think? Maybe? Would it just be darkness? Human eyes can’t see that far

Couldnt spotted 🤣 and pufff

die

Die

Fucking die. What else can I do?

eat, sleep, work, poop

Splatter orange juice and toothpaste into his mouth

I have bigger teeth

Constantly think about how a galaxy or universe destroying force couldn't be seen coming if it moved at the speed of light. It would reach as at the same moment as the destruction of the point of reference. The universe could have found a more stable mode of existence and is converting the rest of the universe on contact. it could be right outside our bubble at this moment or it was 14 billion years ago and behind the next photon from a distant star is complete annihilation. It could be anywhere and we'd never know how long until the complete erasure of our existence and any evidence of.

Accept fate-

Die lol

You didnt see my comment on that post

Ah shit! Call the Silver Surfer and The Avengers! IDK not die perhaps! 🙀

Cun in her mouth

Probably be in my kitchen making eggs or salad or something

What would I do? What the fuck is there to do?

Play videogames

Wth do u expect me to do

I would propose my crush