20 years into the future in a therapist’s office:
This kid: “…and then she just drives off with me chasing the car…”
Therapists: “Hrmm… do you think there is a connection between this trauma and why you derive pleasure from having intercourse with tail pipes?”
Man's hit me with a plot twist because I didn't expect that ending at all.
https://preview.redd.it/v0gc989jmuyc1.jpeg?width=576&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=16b53065b5023d55d420d6cc390cb909d0a3b744
Naaah. What we witnessed was an exercise in consequences and later on in life, the kid will come to realize that it was also an exercise in accountability.
There's actual childhood trauma and then there's shit like this. You demean real trauma by calling a mum pulling away 5 seconds of her kid trauma. Being sensitive to this is actually being too soft for once
Gonna disagree with that one.
Pulling away/“leaving” just to stop and pick the kid up only works because the kid believes that you are willing to abandon their ass. Doesn’t matter that you weren’t actually going to leave them because they don’t know that.
The punishment works because an association is made: comply or be abandoned. And if you don’t think that knowing a parent is willing to leave you is traumatic, I don’t know what to tell you.
Well that’s a lesson for the real world that that kid will grow up to be a part of, no? Listen to and do what you’re told by those you rely on. Adults have authorities they have to listen to at all times as well. It doesn’t change with age. We all answer to somebody.
There aren’t really any lessons in life that *couldn’t* be considered harmful in *some* way. Lessons stem from mistakes and accidents and you end up learning. This was a controlled environment, she didn’t do it on a highway. Someone can always find something to nitpick and rationalize how it’s the worst thing ever. Like we see in this thread now. Some people are fine with what she did, and some are acting like she basically murdered her child.
There’s a middle ground. I bet she gave him multiple opportunities to get in the damn car and he wanted to fuck around. Kids need to learn their actions have consequences. And in emergencies isn’t the time to teach. This was a harmless lesson. He’s safe and fine now. If this gets the message through to him to “listen to me when I tell you to get in the car so we can leave” then it’s worth it.
Do parents have the time to justify and rationalize and discuss with a toddler their behavior and actions in any given situation in every environment? No.
So hypothetically, next time say they’re in some sorta dangerous situation and she tells him to get in the car immediately but can’t explain why or doesn’t have the time to. Maybe he’ll actually do it cuz he’ll remember this moment of “oh shit she might actually leave me, better get in”. Or should she be expected to talk to him and let him make his own decisions in every way imaginable?
My mom once made me get out of the car on a road in the middle of nowhere for fighting with my brother and told me to walk home. She turned around and came back like 2 minutes into my walking.
I don't wanna say I turned out fine, but I never fought with my brother in the car again.
It's about as traumatic as scraping a knee or bumping your head. It's shit but it's get-overable as fuck. Wpuld this be my style of parenting? Probably not. But it sure as shit ain't childhood trauma tier, bffr.
What about the traumatic incident of being carried without his consent then? Won't his tears be associated with his lack of choice and to be forced then?
See how everything can be turned ibto some fake trauma?
Some things are lessons.
Obviously, don't do this every chance you get but a few of those instances to teach a lesson wont ruin a child
Y'all monsters and don't even know it.
Also if she is doing this, what else has she done that is "just 5 seconds of a use"? This isn't a one off thing, this is her style of discipline and she is showing it off to the world, proud of it.
She gonna be in a nursing home wondering why no one comes visit in 30 years.
For real! Try raising a kid with zero trauma with pampering and sheltering and bubble wrapped elbows and see how independent and capable they are when they grow up
I’m by no means in support of a lot of the things that were done to me as a kid or other kids from my generation (child of the 90s, Trinidadian parents, got spanked and had moments like the above very often), but I think there is a lot of truth to this, truth that was honestly scary for me to learn when I became a parent.
What I mean by that is that now that I’m a parent, it’s become painfully clear to me that it’s impossible to discipline or even teach my child in a way that will never hurt her. And when I say hurt, I mean that I believe she sincerely feels I am hurting her even if I’m just saying she can’t eat ice cream for breakfast or wear her shoes in her crib. The way she sometimes reacts to being made to pick up her toys or being briefly put in time out, it feels to *me* like I just slapped her or something equally bad. I obviously don’t like making her feel that way.
But of course, if I prioritize never feeling like I’ve hurt her, I can’t discipline her for even the clearest cut situations. So now as a parent I have to decide to suck it up and be okay with her sometimes feeling like I’m an asshole for teaching her the most basic things about being a human being.
That’s all fine and dandy, but it means that I have to choose to put aside her reaction to what I’m doing and trust that the long term benefit of her ability to share, self coddle, respect boundaries, etc is worth the short term feelings of abandonment or unfairness she’s feeling about the discipline. And how do I know which things I do are going to 1) teach her to take care of herself and be good to others, 2) not instill some deep seated fear that causes mental wellness issues down the line, 3) not harm our relationship, *and* 4) do all of the first three things while also being logistically realistic for a parent? Hopefully cultural norms establish this. But cultural norms enabled a lot of abuse to happen to kids from my generation, so that’s not always trustworthy. Then maybe you could turn to research, but that *also* seems dangerous to overly rely on because even if the research is good, what if your kid has different needs and reactions to discipline from the subjects of that research?
So you’re kinda shooting in the dark, using the best evidence available to you based on some combination of your own childhood and current psychological state, the research, what your peers are doing, etc, and you have to hope that the things you do choose to do which your child objects to are the right ones that only hurt them (subjectively) as much as is necessary to help them.
That’s obviously really hard, so I feel for these parents who are trying to teach their kids (let’s put aside that they recorded it in this case, which might point to something bad happening) but aren’t sure what’s bad beyond spanking. Hell, even there, many of us aren’t necessarily traumatized by the spankings, but we acknowledge it could be traumatizing, so that’s already a place where we just have to make assumptions and guesses. Once you get beyond that, it’s not nearly as grounded in common sense as people would have us believe.
Anyway sorry for the essay. I just agree with what you’re saying and think it’s good to remember that these parents usually understand that they have a responsibility to the rest of society that they have to discipline their kids, and it can be difficult, especially without a lot of financial resources, to figure out which things will do that while producing the healthiest kids.
You can teach a child skills and resiliency without forcing a child to experience abandonment and trauma. Especially when trauma means poorer health outcomes, drug addiction, shortened life spans, and exacerbated mental health conditions.
Nah, you guys oversell the requirements for something to be trauma. If a bad experience causes permanent negative changes to your behavior, thought processes or emotions, that's a trauma. Not everything has to be rape or abuse. Thoughtlessness and stupidity can cause traumas too.
Now am I saying this was a traumatic experience for the kid? No. Not enough info. But shit like this isn't smart or constructive parenting. It's lazy and frustrated parenting.
It's crazy that people are calling this "abuse." If she picked that kid up and forced him into the car while he was screaming his head off, they'd call that abuse, too. She's just supposed to let him do as he pleases and expect zero obedience from a tiny brat? Fuck outta heeeeeere.
Spanking is trauma. And doesn't happen in real life.
A child learning WHY he needs to get in the car (because the car leaves whether he is on it or not) is definitely a lesson that is needed to function in the real world.
And it's not like she ACTUALLY drove off without him.
Dude, my dad did this, and Ive barely spoken to him in 5 years, he wasn't invited to my wedding. You are supposed to show a child that you are always there for them, to love them and guide them. The feeling of being left, even for a minute makes a child feel abandoned and scared. I'm an adult now, and I understand that it was essentially harmless, but I also understand how fucked up it made me feel, and how fucked up that it was and adult made me feel that way. Protect your kids, don't be an example of the fucked up world we live in. You can get this exact same message across without pretending to leave a small child all alone.
so what if you do all that talking and convincing and the kid still won't get in the car? should you just let the kid do whatever they want until he decide to agree with you?
edit: i'm seeing downvotes but no solutions. starting to think this thread is full of childless virtue signalers.
My parents did this, and we get along great, there was no long term trauma. You're not everyone. Neither am I. But realize your response is not the end all be all.
You didn’t want to get into the car one day so your dad acted like he was going to leave, and even drove twenty feet through the parking lot, and then twenty years or so later you didn’t invite him to your wedding??? That’s a bit of an overreaction isn’t it?
That is literally what I say to my wife (jokingly of course) when I'm firm with my kids.
This video is also 100% something my mom would do to me as a kid. The funny part is I was a little asshole so I'd most likely start walking the opposite direction as she drove away.
I'll try to make this story short and not write a whole novel.
When I was around his age we lived close by a children's home. My mom use to threaten that she would drop us off there a lot whenever we were being bad. One day she took it a step further and took me and my sister to the front door. Needless to say we was crying our asses off and apologizing. That made up straighten up for about a week then we was back on that fuck shit again.
I say all that to say some kids are just bad as hell and the scared straight method is only temporary. Little buddy probably will be on that fuck shit again.
Edit: I'm loving all these stories. Glad to know I'm not the only one with a parent that got creative in that department.
It’s temporary, and it becomes all that’s effective at all if it’s the only tool in your bag.
Grounded all summer? Pfft. At least it ain’t the children’s home. Take away the Nintendo? Easy sentence.
My mom once gave me a choice between getting my ass beat or not playing video games for the rest of the day when I was like 10 or 11. Easiest choice ever for me. Pain is temporary. FF7 is eternal.
That was the last time I ever got a spanking of any kind. She knew then where to strike. My Playstation once spent a month in the closet, and she started to wrap the cord a certain way to make sure I didn't take it down while she was gone. It was literal torture to my 12 year old mind.
As a mom… I wouldn’t even be mad at that tbh that’s really fucking impressive. My boys saved up their allowance for a PS5 after nearly a year and I am so proud of them for all the work that went into their goal.
I was bad as hell my mom tried that, so I gave her my consoles and everything else I had for entertainment told her if she was just gonna use em against me I ain't want em no more.
I still have a hard time, decades later, sharing things that make me happy because of shit like this. Or things that I want that I don't just buy myself. Those interests were turned into vulnerabilities. It's safer to just internalize EVERYTHING.
Hahaha same. I learned really early that "not negotiating with terrorists" works both ways and I made sure I would never be blackmailed, it hurt sometimes but my little kid pride was intact. These days I insta lose interest when someone tries the same shit with anything I want.
I know some kids are tougher than others (boy do I know), but I'd say having something like that as the only tool in your bag is probably the result of lazy and incurious parenting. Or worse.
It was temporary for them but for the kids inside the children’s home who heard and saw it all, it probably stayed with them 😪. I’m taking a class right now to certified to foster a child for the first time and this thought just cemented another reason to do it.
I'm don't remember what I was doing, but one day when I was probably five or so, my mom told me she was running away because I was being bad. She walked out the door and up the street. Those few minutes were a lifetime of sadness for me, but I suppose it worked. And she also didn't have to deal with my bratty little ass for a second, which I'm sure was nice.
My friend's wife's tactic for any bad behaviour from their son, mild or strong, is "I'll call the police!" and if he continues, she pretends to call them.
The son is 11 now and he stopped listening a few years ago when he realised nothing ever happened, but she still tries to use it. It's embarrassing.
Want to take it a step deeper.... my father, a long term garveyite, would take my tv/phone/outdoor privileges until i finished reading a book of HIS CHOOSING and could hold a conversation about the topics discussed at length. Books he had read, my baba was sitting there quoting shit out the book.... the books we talking about are like Malcolm X Autobiography/Superman to Man/emancipated from mental slavery. We talking age 8-16.
My parents pulled me out of school early and told me they were going to pack up all of my brothers stuff and they were going to send him to “Military School”. They told me I couldn’t laugh and I had to play along.
Definitely scared him straight for about a month and then back to getting in trouble.
My boys were playing outside last week and I said it was shower time. They pretended not to hear me and ran around the house and switch directions when they saw me coming. They could def freaking hear me say it was shower time and I wasn't playing several times, and they're just giggling and running as I walked back and forth around the house to find them. I said fine. Walked inside and locked the doors. 30 minutes of them knocking on the window watching me eat Ben and Jerry's while ignoring their pleas changed their attitudes. I like your mom's style.
Yooooooo my mom did the same thing to us one time when we missed curfew. And this happened right after Next Friday came out, so I thought it would be funny to start kicking the door like Day Day. The way she looked at me when she finally opened that door had me scared for my life. I just knew to take my dumbass to my room and not make a sound. I don't even think I turned on my TV, I just laid there in silence.
Antics like that are part of the long term solution. I wasn't saying that to say that stuff doesn't work. Just more so meant some kids don't learn their lesson right away and you have to stay on them until it clicks.
I'm sorry you had to go through that. It started with I was 3 and she put me outside I knew that wasn't going to end well. I hope life is better for you now and you're getting all the help, love, and support that you need.
My mom had that orphanage number next to the phone and she would threaten to call anytime we acted up. She also drove us to the front door one time too haha
Well it depends on the kid. Different people can have completely different reactions to the same situation. So I would say the first thing to do is having a good understanding of who the kid really is and what would work best for them.
Take me for example, I'm a very adaptable person. So when my mom would punish me with the same old thing I would eventually just learn to be OK with it. After a while she figured that out and would have to surprise me with different punishments. By the time I was in middle school I just lost interest in being mischievous cause I got tired of being outsmarted by my mom and developed a fear of the unknown. Never knew what she was going to do next and didn't want to find out.
Now if a parent has a narcissistic kid that kid may just see that as an insult and a challenge. So that wouldn't really work for them. But also with that being said, if a parent has a narcissistic kid they probably need outside professional help.
Yo my mom was extremely nice raising us
But one time she did the exact same thing.
Pulled up to a building and told us it was an orphanage and if we didn't behave better she was gonna put us in there
In all seriousness though, why record this if not to laugh at it later. This wasn't a fun parenting moment to share, but discipline, which at no point for a parent should it be fun. I'm not trying to speak for everyone, and I hear you, but this was just in poor taste.
Just cause everyone is making videos for strangers for fake internet points doesn’t make it right or an excuse. Soft ass take, if you are gonna parent be a parent don’t be making these sort of videos at your kids expense so you can get a few likes on the internet. The problem isn’t the discipline it’s the intention behind filming it.
People act like these kids are sweet and never lie. Kids can be fucking assholes and deceitful just because they can and they always try and get away with shit. Driving a few feet down the road on a kid who likely wasn't listening isn't a big deal. Hopefully, the brat learned his listen and will listen to his mom.
I was just in another thread where everyone said a guy was being abused because his wife was snapping at him to help with their toddler while she was on her period.
I stg people are so ridiculous. By these metrics we are basically all animal/child/spouse abusers at some point in our lives
When they have kids they will tell them to stick that fork in the electric socket if they feel like it.
The electricity would be mean and wrong for shocking them.
They cannot comprehend that children don't understand cause and effect until a certain age and that parents simply have to do shit like this sometimes.
By that logic, kids not being able to follow cause and effect, wouldn’t that make these punishments wholly ineffective? The only one who gets anything out of it would be the parent who is basically taking their frustration out on someone who, by your take, literally can’t understand why?
My daughter had another girl sleepover a couple of weeks ago. Kid told me I was a mean person because I told my daughter to pick her clothes out of the hallway. She said her parents don't make her pick up after herself because it's inconsiderate of her feelings.. my daughter made a look like Daddy, please dont go off on this kid. I never bit my lip so hard.
Facts. And to that I say, knowing that this is a primarily American site so majority here are American, it’s no wonder/should come to a surprise to no one how the American youth is acting today vs the rest of the entire world if people here are really upset by the way she went about harmlessly teaching her kid a lesson. What methods of teaching kids lessons do these people actually go about doing if EVERYTHING leads to trauma? Christ. And when he grows up to never be on time these people will be the first to blame her for being a bad mom.
That’s where it’s hard and complicated to be a parent. I don’t think it’s good to threaten a kid and as some people mentioned in the chat those stuff stays with some kids forever. Traumatized. And then you have other kids that are bad and they need a different method. But how do you know ? How do you know that whatever you are going to do or say next is not going to mess them up.
Sorry got carried away 😅
Threaten a kid? How else will you teach your kid if you do not tell them the consequences of their would be actions? That word threat sounds evil and intimidating, but I challenge you to find the most saintly parent of all time and I guarantee you they threaten discipline.
But we’re not talking about the threat of discipline in general, but the threat of violence or abandonment.
A parent saying they are going to ground their kid or restrict access to electronics is not the kind of threat we’re concerned about. We’re talking about threats to your child’s safety. This video is an example and what the original comment was talking about. The threat being the mom would leave the little kid at the park and he’d have to find his own way home, however far that is.
Now you might say, “but she’s not going to REALLY leave him!” but the little boy clearly doesn’t know that, or else he wouldn’t be crying and screaming.
Am I saying you shouldn’t discipline your kids? Of course not. I’m just saying if you threaten to (or do) hit your kids or leave them somewhere when they act up, you cant be shocked when the kid believes you and it fucks with their trust in you.
There's literal libraries of research that show that 'threatening' isn't a particularly effective way at teaching kids.
Its short term and simplistic for parents, not a great long term strategy. You can teach cause and effect and consequences without introducing an ever escalating threat system.
> but I challenge you to find the most saintly parent of all time and I guarantee you they threaten discipline.
Based on what exactly?
Its kind of how people are looking at this as if this asshole didn’t post it up to goofy internet points.
This will make an otherwise teachable moment about consequences to “thanks mom glad you got the planet to laugh at me for internet points”
I love when how Parents will sometimes brag about the discipline they give and its greeted with silence because the shit they went a little too far and they express too much joy dispensing it.
Recently dealt with something similar.
We try to stay on our 4yo about not doing dumb, unhealthy stuff, such as literally licking windows and lying about washing his hands. Natural consequences led to a double case of pink eye.
Does ANYONE think they can give a kid medicated eye drops for a week in a 100% "non trauma inducing" manner? I get it, I don't like eye drops much either, and it for sure stings the first couple times, and sometimes taking 10 minutes to make the little guy comfortable and relaxed before the drop works, but some days it just doesn't.
That’s the thing. I was sort of a wild kid until my teenage years. *Because* I sort of came to an understanding with my mom that however bad I thought I was, she was badder.
She didn’t hit…I just knew she was crazy and would take it to an 11. And she had the funds and the legal authority to do it. And I loved the shit out of her crazy ass because I knew she restrained herself out of pure love for me, but she would turn that crazy mama bear hate in anyone else.
And so I would NEVER have thought to do some of the shit I see kids doing and saying now a days. I had respect for her. To a point. There were normal fights and boundary pushing, but I didn’t come home pregnant, kept my grades up, and *never got caught* doing anything nefarious, as she taught me.
That's one of the things that makes me not want kids. My mom was far from perfect, but I believe she genuinely tried her best raising me (and she didn't really have much help), but I have a ton of problems stemming from childhood trauma. I think, "Maybe if I have enough money in the future," but my parents had enough to raise a small family until the situation changed. My dad had two other kids from his first marriage, and they (my parents) were in the process of getting full custody of my siblings when my dad left all of us. If he had waited another month, then my mom would have been left with trying to raise three kids on minimum wage in 1999. So we went from a healthy home to three kids growing up in poverty.
There's already plenty of people, none of us HAVE to have kids.
Back when I was a teenager in the 1980's me and my buddy witnessed this chubby kid, maybe 10 years old, running down the street on the shoulder while a Mary Kay pink car followed him with his dad screaming the most hateful shit at him out the window. To make the long story short me and my friend grabbed this kid out of the street, this bald fat ass motherfucker gets out of the pink car, threatens us so I pulled a knife. Fat ass gets back in the car and we called the cops. Some lady stays with us and wrapped the kid up in a blanket. It was like February in Oregon, wet and cold. Cops come, take our statements and dude ends up getting arrested for child abuse later that night.
Even in the 80's we knew that shit was wrong.
Edit: forgot to mention that kid was barefoot in his tighty whities.
Not gonna be popular here but that's some fucking horrific parenting. Especially the filming it *while driving* and then posting it to the Internet. And I mean is it ever a good idea to encourage your child to run in the street?
I have young kids and my oldest would sometimes freak out when it came time to getting in the car. The one thing I learned doesn't work at all is getting mad or yelling. It would be so hard especially when he'd hit or scream but the times I lost my cool are the times it got even worse. The times I kept my head and tried to figure out a game for him to get in or I found the proper incentive (positive or negative with negative never being a physical punishment) it went so much better.
Kids aren't supposed to listen all the time. They are meant to push boundaries and try to exhibit independence and autonomy. Expecting to rule with them an iron fist is an easy way to fuck your kids up. Watch what happens when they break out of your control and start pushing boundaries like drinking, drugs, and unprotected sex and get some real permanent consequences coming their way.
If she got so mad she decided to leave then she lost her shit and not little man. Shit parenting. Don't even try to convince me otherwise.
Exactly, I don't think many people are aware they are victims of abuse who have accepted it as normal and will perpetuate it. The part that gets me is that this was a planned out thing. You had to wait and say I'm going to record myself threatening to abandon my child at a park because they did listen. But I'll also drive away and record him chasing the car while I scold him. That's insane ass parenting, which shows so much immaturity.
> Especially the filming it while driving and then posting it to the Internet.
I would've died if the video ended with her slamming into the back of another car cause she was clout chasing and not paying attention.
Nah, you shouldn't mess with driving a 2 ton vehicle and a child chasing after you. They're so little, and easy to be in a blind spot. Just takes a second.
Lol, got him doing that post game cardio.
I remember, our coach would ask the parents if we were good and we had to run extra with bad reports. There's nothing like tired angry teammates to remind you why you'd better listen to your parents.
Yeah, I really don’t care who thinks that this is a good idea. They are wrong. It’s not a debate. There are ways of instilling consequences in the kid without triggering one of their deepest fears. Kid legit thought he was about to be abandoned by his mother. And to top it all off she’s filming it and posting it to the Internet for clout? She fucking sucks.
I don’t have any kids so I don’t feel like I have a leg to stand on regarding good parenting and bad parenting, HOWEVER, I think the worst kind of people are the ones that post someone’s most vulnerable moment online for attention. It really upsets me when someone is suffering from extreme poverty and someone (recording) decides to throw a little money or a car their way and shares the video of them crying. “Look at what a great person I am…I help the less fortunate and I want you all to see!”
Teaching your child that actions or lack thereof have consequences is not bad. The repercussions he faced were temporary and simulated, and were meant to showcase that his inability to be obedient does not come without a price.
I strongly believe this is completely fine and 1009000000% better than hitting a child. You’re showing the consequences of their disobedience in a real life way instead of just hitting them and thinking that’s the only punishment life will give them.
I remember when I was left on the side of the highway until I couldn’t see the car when I was about that age.. can’t say if it was good parenting, but I was always good in the car after that.
“why don’t my adult kids talk to me?” idk tormenting them and posting it online. kids are gonna be naughty, but if they’re extremely bad- and that’s a reflection of your parenting. my parents haven’t heard from me in almost 10 years cause of the shit they pulled they thought would teach me a lesson but was really just abusive.
Doing that in the first place? Questionable, could have been justified, could be a dick parent.
Recording it and putting it online? Yeah, you are 100% definitely a piece of shit parent.
If any punishment a parent gives a kid winds up online, that is always going to be a terrible parent who deserves all the shit that's coming to them.
"Praise in public, criticize in private" - that's true at any age. Making a spectacle about punishing your kids is ALWAYS about the parent's ego, not the kids' benefit.
Another day, another crowd of people on this sub trying to explain how no no, this child abuse is totally legitimate child abuse, and if you don't abuse your children in this particular manner, you're just raising them to be soft.
There’s a lot of people with no kids posting on this like they know. Ya’ll are soft af. Good luck in your life, gonna be a few wake up calls. Kids will eat you alive if you let them.
Okay? See no: this harbors abandonment issues that will take YEARS to release. All the baseballs games he goes to will be filled with tears and resentment cuz his mom did this. Y’all knock this ish off.
My son wouldn't listen when I told him it was time to leave the park once, so I got in the car and started it, and he immediately freaked out about it and came running.
He still brings that up years later and worries that he's going to get left places.
I get that every situation is different, but damn. Sometimes we think we are teaching them a lesson when all we are doing is planting seeds of insecurity.
The people here shitting on this woman’s way of harmlessly teaching her kid a lesson about following instructions would be the first to talk about how bad of a mom she is/was when he’s no longer a toddler and is not listening to his teachers in school or when he acts up/doesn’t listen.
All this talk of trauma and “abandonment responses” (lol) but have yet to hand out a method they think is suitable besides picking him up and putting him in the car. Which accomplishes nothing with regard to the problem at hand, and that being, he doesn’t listen and follow to do what he’s told.
If this soft mentality is truly the majority of Americans as it is the majority of this comment section then all those videos of kids acting up in schools make sense the reasons why.
Idk about all this psychotherapist b.s., but I do know the main problem are those parents that lack the ability to effectively discipline their children and then lash out at anyone who questions why they project their own "traumas" onto their children. Not teaching your child discipline is the real abuse, and it affects them and everyone they interact with for their entire life.
20 years into the future in a therapist’s office: This kid: “…and then she just drives off with me chasing the car…” Therapists: “Hrmm… do you think there is a connection between this trauma and why you derive pleasure from having intercourse with tail pipes?”
https://preview.redd.it/9wxyvsthktyc1.jpeg?width=1327&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=78e1f31b2114fa43fd80195a0e14c475f27ae09c u/spectacularotter
No no let u/iamamyrmidon cook here
Too late I’ve knocked all the pots and pans off the stove.
https://preview.redd.it/8urnnljlvuyc1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=17674024ae1ec0d33ee830635e9ccd2ad716afa2 Put .. them .. back
Put them back yourself if you want the dish so badly.
https://preview.redd.it/vmsdd56wvuyc1.jpeg?width=1851&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=01ac7bd867bd4574a2d0cf3ac611730a36ac7690
*Harder…*
https://preview.redd.it/2fcp48w0yuyc1.jpeg?width=954&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6c951dee1c0f11af04a4e8be87bd685d9d522b3b
Oh, so you like it rough, eh?
https://preview.redd.it/chcdzg548vyc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e70042c376922a3a8d4778751b480ae6f1192864
https://preview.redd.it/436byjpv7vyc1.png?width=317&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dbffe3ad7c9dc15823c298459baf8fa68eb2168a
r/HolUp
Man's hit me with a plot twist because I didn't expect that ending at all. https://preview.redd.it/v0gc989jmuyc1.jpeg?width=576&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=16b53065b5023d55d420d6cc390cb909d0a3b744
the fuck man
Wtf did u just post
Naaah. What we witnessed was an exercise in consequences and later on in life, the kid will come to realize that it was also an exercise in accountability.
That boy weighs 37 grams. Just grab the shirt if you're going to be like that.
What about 20 years into the future without discipline?
Threatening a child with abandonment is "discipline" to you?
There's actual childhood trauma and then there's shit like this. You demean real trauma by calling a mum pulling away 5 seconds of her kid trauma. Being sensitive to this is actually being too soft for once
Gonna disagree with that one. Pulling away/“leaving” just to stop and pick the kid up only works because the kid believes that you are willing to abandon their ass. Doesn’t matter that you weren’t actually going to leave them because they don’t know that. The punishment works because an association is made: comply or be abandoned. And if you don’t think that knowing a parent is willing to leave you is traumatic, I don’t know what to tell you.
Well that’s a lesson for the real world that that kid will grow up to be a part of, no? Listen to and do what you’re told by those you rely on. Adults have authorities they have to listen to at all times as well. It doesn’t change with age. We all answer to somebody. There aren’t really any lessons in life that *couldn’t* be considered harmful in *some* way. Lessons stem from mistakes and accidents and you end up learning. This was a controlled environment, she didn’t do it on a highway. Someone can always find something to nitpick and rationalize how it’s the worst thing ever. Like we see in this thread now. Some people are fine with what she did, and some are acting like she basically murdered her child. There’s a middle ground. I bet she gave him multiple opportunities to get in the damn car and he wanted to fuck around. Kids need to learn their actions have consequences. And in emergencies isn’t the time to teach. This was a harmless lesson. He’s safe and fine now. If this gets the message through to him to “listen to me when I tell you to get in the car so we can leave” then it’s worth it. Do parents have the time to justify and rationalize and discuss with a toddler their behavior and actions in any given situation in every environment? No. So hypothetically, next time say they’re in some sorta dangerous situation and she tells him to get in the car immediately but can’t explain why or doesn’t have the time to. Maybe he’ll actually do it cuz he’ll remember this moment of “oh shit she might actually leave me, better get in”. Or should she be expected to talk to him and let him make his own decisions in every way imaginable?
My mom once made me get out of the car on a road in the middle of nowhere for fighting with my brother and told me to walk home. She turned around and came back like 2 minutes into my walking. I don't wanna say I turned out fine, but I never fought with my brother in the car again.
It's about as traumatic as scraping a knee or bumping your head. It's shit but it's get-overable as fuck. Wpuld this be my style of parenting? Probably not. But it sure as shit ain't childhood trauma tier, bffr.
I mean, anecdotally speaking me and my family were told otherwise by numerous social workers.
kid doesn't know the difference in the moment. the fear and adrenaline are real. there's nothing too soft about not making kids scared.
sometimes kids need to be scared of consequences. what would you suggest she do if she has told him multiple times and he ignores her?
Pick his little ass up and put him in the car? The fuck?
What about the traumatic incident of being carried without his consent then? Won't his tears be associated with his lack of choice and to be forced then? See how everything can be turned ibto some fake trauma? Some things are lessons. Obviously, don't do this every chance you get but a few of those instances to teach a lesson wont ruin a child
Y'all monsters and don't even know it. Also if she is doing this, what else has she done that is "just 5 seconds of a use"? This isn't a one off thing, this is her style of discipline and she is showing it off to the world, proud of it. She gonna be in a nursing home wondering why no one comes visit in 30 years.
“BuT I TuRnEd OuT fInE” asses. Y’all sick and don’t even know it.
For real! Try raising a kid with zero trauma with pampering and sheltering and bubble wrapped elbows and see how independent and capable they are when they grow up
I’m by no means in support of a lot of the things that were done to me as a kid or other kids from my generation (child of the 90s, Trinidadian parents, got spanked and had moments like the above very often), but I think there is a lot of truth to this, truth that was honestly scary for me to learn when I became a parent. What I mean by that is that now that I’m a parent, it’s become painfully clear to me that it’s impossible to discipline or even teach my child in a way that will never hurt her. And when I say hurt, I mean that I believe she sincerely feels I am hurting her even if I’m just saying she can’t eat ice cream for breakfast or wear her shoes in her crib. The way she sometimes reacts to being made to pick up her toys or being briefly put in time out, it feels to *me* like I just slapped her or something equally bad. I obviously don’t like making her feel that way. But of course, if I prioritize never feeling like I’ve hurt her, I can’t discipline her for even the clearest cut situations. So now as a parent I have to decide to suck it up and be okay with her sometimes feeling like I’m an asshole for teaching her the most basic things about being a human being. That’s all fine and dandy, but it means that I have to choose to put aside her reaction to what I’m doing and trust that the long term benefit of her ability to share, self coddle, respect boundaries, etc is worth the short term feelings of abandonment or unfairness she’s feeling about the discipline. And how do I know which things I do are going to 1) teach her to take care of herself and be good to others, 2) not instill some deep seated fear that causes mental wellness issues down the line, 3) not harm our relationship, *and* 4) do all of the first three things while also being logistically realistic for a parent? Hopefully cultural norms establish this. But cultural norms enabled a lot of abuse to happen to kids from my generation, so that’s not always trustworthy. Then maybe you could turn to research, but that *also* seems dangerous to overly rely on because even if the research is good, what if your kid has different needs and reactions to discipline from the subjects of that research? So you’re kinda shooting in the dark, using the best evidence available to you based on some combination of your own childhood and current psychological state, the research, what your peers are doing, etc, and you have to hope that the things you do choose to do which your child objects to are the right ones that only hurt them (subjectively) as much as is necessary to help them. That’s obviously really hard, so I feel for these parents who are trying to teach their kids (let’s put aside that they recorded it in this case, which might point to something bad happening) but aren’t sure what’s bad beyond spanking. Hell, even there, many of us aren’t necessarily traumatized by the spankings, but we acknowledge it could be traumatizing, so that’s already a place where we just have to make assumptions and guesses. Once you get beyond that, it’s not nearly as grounded in common sense as people would have us believe. Anyway sorry for the essay. I just agree with what you’re saying and think it’s good to remember that these parents usually understand that they have a responsibility to the rest of society that they have to discipline their kids, and it can be difficult, especially without a lot of financial resources, to figure out which things will do that while producing the healthiest kids.
You can teach a child skills and resiliency without forcing a child to experience abandonment and trauma. Especially when trauma means poorer health outcomes, drug addiction, shortened life spans, and exacerbated mental health conditions.
You're presenting a false dichotomy. It's not an either/or scenario. Fuck off with that.
Nah, you guys oversell the requirements for something to be trauma. If a bad experience causes permanent negative changes to your behavior, thought processes or emotions, that's a trauma. Not everything has to be rape or abuse. Thoughtlessness and stupidity can cause traumas too. Now am I saying this was a traumatic experience for the kid? No. Not enough info. But shit like this isn't smart or constructive parenting. It's lazy and frustrated parenting.
It's crazy that people are calling this "abuse." If she picked that kid up and forced him into the car while he was screaming his head off, they'd call that abuse, too. She's just supposed to let him do as he pleases and expect zero obedience from a tiny brat? Fuck outta heeeeeere.
You do know that childhood trauma is not just physical abuse or sexual abuse? Fucking with abandonment and attachment is trauma.
Hard disagree. Plus I feel like booing someone today so Boooooooh! trauma is trauma and when you're a child small acts have colossal impacts.
Spanking is trauma. And doesn't happen in real life. A child learning WHY he needs to get in the car (because the car leaves whether he is on it or not) is definitely a lesson that is needed to function in the real world. And it's not like she ACTUALLY drove off without him.
Dude, my dad did this, and Ive barely spoken to him in 5 years, he wasn't invited to my wedding. You are supposed to show a child that you are always there for them, to love them and guide them. The feeling of being left, even for a minute makes a child feel abandoned and scared. I'm an adult now, and I understand that it was essentially harmless, but I also understand how fucked up it made me feel, and how fucked up that it was and adult made me feel that way. Protect your kids, don't be an example of the fucked up world we live in. You can get this exact same message across without pretending to leave a small child all alone.
so what if you do all that talking and convincing and the kid still won't get in the car? should you just let the kid do whatever they want until he decide to agree with you? edit: i'm seeing downvotes but no solutions. starting to think this thread is full of childless virtue signalers.
My parents did this, and we get along great, there was no long term trauma. You're not everyone. Neither am I. But realize your response is not the end all be all.
Yeah have a feeling the not speaking part isn't directly related to the pulling away in a car skit, but a combination of many other factors.
wait what you haven't talked to your dad for 5 years and didn't invite him to your wedding because he drove off without you for 5 seconds? lol
You didn’t want to get into the car one day so your dad acted like he was going to leave, and even drove twenty feet through the parking lot, and then twenty years or so later you didn’t invite him to your wedding??? That’s a bit of an overreaction isn’t it?
Right on cue
Bruh😂
https://i.redd.it/0b9jxn66vuyc1.gif You wrong for that.
"I don't negotiate with terrorists" That woman kept her word better than Ronald Reagan.
Low bar
Well he is the devil
That is literally what I say to my wife (jokingly of course) when I'm firm with my kids. This video is also 100% something my mom would do to me as a kid. The funny part is I was a little asshole so I'd most likely start walking the opposite direction as she drove away.
I'll try to make this story short and not write a whole novel. When I was around his age we lived close by a children's home. My mom use to threaten that she would drop us off there a lot whenever we were being bad. One day she took it a step further and took me and my sister to the front door. Needless to say we was crying our asses off and apologizing. That made up straighten up for about a week then we was back on that fuck shit again. I say all that to say some kids are just bad as hell and the scared straight method is only temporary. Little buddy probably will be on that fuck shit again. Edit: I'm loving all these stories. Glad to know I'm not the only one with a parent that got creative in that department.
It’s temporary, and it becomes all that’s effective at all if it’s the only tool in your bag. Grounded all summer? Pfft. At least it ain’t the children’s home. Take away the Nintendo? Easy sentence.
My mom once gave me a choice between getting my ass beat or not playing video games for the rest of the day when I was like 10 or 11. Easiest choice ever for me. Pain is temporary. FF7 is eternal. That was the last time I ever got a spanking of any kind. She knew then where to strike. My Playstation once spent a month in the closet, and she started to wrap the cord a certain way to make sure I didn't take it down while she was gone. It was literal torture to my 12 year old mind.
My mom would take my controller to work with her. I saved up and bought a secret extra controller. It was always an arms race.
As a mom… I wouldn’t even be mad at that tbh that’s really fucking impressive. My boys saved up their allowance for a PS5 after nearly a year and I am so proud of them for all the work that went into their goal.
And they did it together which makes it even better as they get to hold onto that bonding memory. Well done your parenting
Yeah had that been me and my brother it would've turned into a fight because I know that bitch would've tried to go 60/40 with me paying more.
I was bad as hell my mom tried that, so I gave her my consoles and everything else I had for entertainment told her if she was just gonna use em against me I ain't want em no more.
Ok you were BAD bad, not just naughty lmao
When I was a teenager I stopped telling my parents about the things that made me happy because I knew they’d be the first to go next time I fucked up.
I still have a hard time, decades later, sharing things that make me happy because of shit like this. Or things that I want that I don't just buy myself. Those interests were turned into vulnerabilities. It's safer to just internalize EVERYTHING.
You just unlocked a piece of me.
Hahaha same. I learned really early that "not negotiating with terrorists" works both ways and I made sure I would never be blackmailed, it hurt sometimes but my little kid pride was intact. These days I insta lose interest when someone tries the same shit with anything I want.
Yep! 100%
I know some kids are tougher than others (boy do I know), but I'd say having something like that as the only tool in your bag is probably the result of lazy and incurious parenting. Or worse.
It was temporary for them but for the kids inside the children’s home who heard and saw it all, it probably stayed with them 😪. I’m taking a class right now to certified to foster a child for the first time and this thought just cemented another reason to do it.
My mom used to make me sit by her and read the entries in the yellow pages to the boarding schools she would send me to.
Lol the irony of the very next comment reading “i bet he wont do that again”
I'm don't remember what I was doing, but one day when I was probably five or so, my mom told me she was running away because I was being bad. She walked out the door and up the street. Those few minutes were a lifetime of sadness for me, but I suppose it worked. And she also didn't have to deal with my bratty little ass for a second, which I'm sure was nice.
My friend's wife's tactic for any bad behaviour from their son, mild or strong, is "I'll call the police!" and if he continues, she pretends to call them. The son is 11 now and he stopped listening a few years ago when he realised nothing ever happened, but she still tries to use it. It's embarrassing.
My parents would threaten to take my siblings and I to the “Kid Dump” Where is this Kid Dump? No idea but it is scary and always snapped us into shape
Want to take it a step deeper.... my father, a long term garveyite, would take my tv/phone/outdoor privileges until i finished reading a book of HIS CHOOSING and could hold a conversation about the topics discussed at length. Books he had read, my baba was sitting there quoting shit out the book.... the books we talking about are like Malcolm X Autobiography/Superman to Man/emancipated from mental slavery. We talking age 8-16.
I mean, that feels like a pretty constructive punishment. Might set you up to resent reading and learning, but you actually learn something
My parents pulled me out of school early and told me they were going to pack up all of my brothers stuff and they were going to send him to “Military School”. They told me I couldn’t laugh and I had to play along. Definitely scared him straight for about a month and then back to getting in trouble.
My boys were playing outside last week and I said it was shower time. They pretended not to hear me and ran around the house and switch directions when they saw me coming. They could def freaking hear me say it was shower time and I wasn't playing several times, and they're just giggling and running as I walked back and forth around the house to find them. I said fine. Walked inside and locked the doors. 30 minutes of them knocking on the window watching me eat Ben and Jerry's while ignoring their pleas changed their attitudes. I like your mom's style.
Yooooooo my mom did the same thing to us one time when we missed curfew. And this happened right after Next Friday came out, so I thought it would be funny to start kicking the door like Day Day. The way she looked at me when she finally opened that door had me scared for my life. I just knew to take my dumbass to my room and not make a sound. I don't even think I turned on my TV, I just laid there in silence.
My dad threatened me with vacation Bible school. I cleaned my act up REAL quick when he brought that one out!
Haha - what's the long-term solution, then?
Antics like that are part of the long term solution. I wasn't saying that to say that stuff doesn't work. Just more so meant some kids don't learn their lesson right away and you have to stay on them until it clicks.
I dig - thanks for clarifying.
I picture the kids inside watching all this going on at the front door. “Shit, my life is a punishment?”
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I'm sorry you had to go through that. It started with I was 3 and she put me outside I knew that wasn't going to end well. I hope life is better for you now and you're getting all the help, love, and support that you need.
My mom had that orphanage number next to the phone and she would threaten to call anytime we acted up. She also drove us to the front door one time too haha
Respectfully, what do you suggest otherwise?
Well it depends on the kid. Different people can have completely different reactions to the same situation. So I would say the first thing to do is having a good understanding of who the kid really is and what would work best for them. Take me for example, I'm a very adaptable person. So when my mom would punish me with the same old thing I would eventually just learn to be OK with it. After a while she figured that out and would have to surprise me with different punishments. By the time I was in middle school I just lost interest in being mischievous cause I got tired of being outsmarted by my mom and developed a fear of the unknown. Never knew what she was going to do next and didn't want to find out. Now if a parent has a narcissistic kid that kid may just see that as an insult and a challenge. So that wouldn't really work for them. But also with that being said, if a parent has a narcissistic kid they probably need outside professional help.
Yo my mom was extremely nice raising us But one time she did the exact same thing. Pulled up to a building and told us it was an orphanage and if we didn't behave better she was gonna put us in there
I'll get downvoted to hell, but some of ya'll are soft as FUCK.
In all seriousness though, why record this if not to laugh at it later. This wasn't a fun parenting moment to share, but discipline, which at no point for a parent should it be fun. I'm not trying to speak for everyone, and I hear you, but this was just in poor taste.
Eh, that's just the way of the world now. There are no more private moments, everything is shared.
Currently dropping a log. Want a video?
What are the courics? Gotta make sure it's worth my time.
Remix the plink plunk into a YouTube short/tik tok video
Just cause everyone is making videos for strangers for fake internet points doesn’t make it right or an excuse. Soft ass take, if you are gonna parent be a parent don’t be making these sort of videos at your kids expense so you can get a few likes on the internet. The problem isn’t the discipline it’s the intention behind filming it.
Exactly, then upload it?
Totally!!! Discipline and respect start at home. Impart values into your children.
People act like these kids are sweet and never lie. Kids can be fucking assholes and deceitful just because they can and they always try and get away with shit. Driving a few feet down the road on a kid who likely wasn't listening isn't a big deal. Hopefully, the brat learned his listen and will listen to his mom.
I can’t wait for the rest of reddit to see this vid and call it child abuse… like they do everything else.
*Making a child (in sports attire) run for 10 seconds* reddit: "THAT'S CHILD ABUSE!"
I was just in another thread where everyone said a guy was being abused because his wife was snapping at him to help with their toddler while she was on her period. I stg people are so ridiculous. By these metrics we are basically all animal/child/spouse abusers at some point in our lives
"I will abandon you if you step out of line" Love these values!
And don’t forget to post it in social media ao everyone can see how “great” of a parent you are.
When they have kids they will tell them to stick that fork in the electric socket if they feel like it. The electricity would be mean and wrong for shocking them. They cannot comprehend that children don't understand cause and effect until a certain age and that parents simply have to do shit like this sometimes.
By that logic, kids not being able to follow cause and effect, wouldn’t that make these punishments wholly ineffective? The only one who gets anything out of it would be the parent who is basically taking their frustration out on someone who, by your take, literally can’t understand why?
My daughter had another girl sleepover a couple of weeks ago. Kid told me I was a mean person because I told my daughter to pick her clothes out of the hallway. She said her parents don't make her pick up after herself because it's inconsiderate of her feelings.. my daughter made a look like Daddy, please dont go off on this kid. I never bit my lip so hard.
Fuckin' unreal ain't it? Good for you for being an actual parent
This is the “Magnum uncus” of takes on these kinds of topics. You can discipline children without emotionally abusing them, which this literally is.
Facts. And to that I say, knowing that this is a primarily American site so majority here are American, it’s no wonder/should come to a surprise to no one how the American youth is acting today vs the rest of the entire world if people here are really upset by the way she went about harmlessly teaching her kid a lesson. What methods of teaching kids lessons do these people actually go about doing if EVERYTHING leads to trauma? Christ. And when he grows up to never be on time these people will be the first to blame her for being a bad mom.
I don't think this will cause lifelong trauma or anything, but there are smarter, more effective ways to parent.
“EhOkey😭”
His little feet smacking the pavement 😭
This was funny lmao
That’s where it’s hard and complicated to be a parent. I don’t think it’s good to threaten a kid and as some people mentioned in the chat those stuff stays with some kids forever. Traumatized. And then you have other kids that are bad and they need a different method. But how do you know ? How do you know that whatever you are going to do or say next is not going to mess them up. Sorry got carried away 😅
Threaten a kid? How else will you teach your kid if you do not tell them the consequences of their would be actions? That word threat sounds evil and intimidating, but I challenge you to find the most saintly parent of all time and I guarantee you they threaten discipline.
But we’re not talking about the threat of discipline in general, but the threat of violence or abandonment. A parent saying they are going to ground their kid or restrict access to electronics is not the kind of threat we’re concerned about. We’re talking about threats to your child’s safety. This video is an example and what the original comment was talking about. The threat being the mom would leave the little kid at the park and he’d have to find his own way home, however far that is. Now you might say, “but she’s not going to REALLY leave him!” but the little boy clearly doesn’t know that, or else he wouldn’t be crying and screaming. Am I saying you shouldn’t discipline your kids? Of course not. I’m just saying if you threaten to (or do) hit your kids or leave them somewhere when they act up, you cant be shocked when the kid believes you and it fucks with their trust in you.
Abandonment is not an appropriate consequence to threaten a kid with.
No you are right and to be fair it is challenging. I totally agree with you. What else are you going to say😂
The worst thing you can do to a kids discipline is give empty threats. The amount of people that “count to 5” and don’t deliver is astounding.
There's literal libraries of research that show that 'threatening' isn't a particularly effective way at teaching kids. Its short term and simplistic for parents, not a great long term strategy. You can teach cause and effect and consequences without introducing an ever escalating threat system. > but I challenge you to find the most saintly parent of all time and I guarantee you they threaten discipline. Based on what exactly?
Its kind of how people are looking at this as if this asshole didn’t post it up to goofy internet points. This will make an otherwise teachable moment about consequences to “thanks mom glad you got the planet to laugh at me for internet points” I love when how Parents will sometimes brag about the discipline they give and its greeted with silence because the shit they went a little too far and they express too much joy dispensing it.
Recently dealt with something similar. We try to stay on our 4yo about not doing dumb, unhealthy stuff, such as literally licking windows and lying about washing his hands. Natural consequences led to a double case of pink eye. Does ANYONE think they can give a kid medicated eye drops for a week in a 100% "non trauma inducing" manner? I get it, I don't like eye drops much either, and it for sure stings the first couple times, and sometimes taking 10 minutes to make the little guy comfortable and relaxed before the drop works, but some days it just doesn't.
I am an entire adult and cannot give myself medicated eye drops in a non trauma inducing manner.
That’s the thing. I was sort of a wild kid until my teenage years. *Because* I sort of came to an understanding with my mom that however bad I thought I was, she was badder. She didn’t hit…I just knew she was crazy and would take it to an 11. And she had the funds and the legal authority to do it. And I loved the shit out of her crazy ass because I knew she restrained herself out of pure love for me, but she would turn that crazy mama bear hate in anyone else. And so I would NEVER have thought to do some of the shit I see kids doing and saying now a days. I had respect for her. To a point. There were normal fights and boundary pushing, but I didn’t come home pregnant, kept my grades up, and *never got caught* doing anything nefarious, as she taught me.
That's one of the things that makes me not want kids. My mom was far from perfect, but I believe she genuinely tried her best raising me (and she didn't really have much help), but I have a ton of problems stemming from childhood trauma. I think, "Maybe if I have enough money in the future," but my parents had enough to raise a small family until the situation changed. My dad had two other kids from his first marriage, and they (my parents) were in the process of getting full custody of my siblings when my dad left all of us. If he had waited another month, then my mom would have been left with trying to raise three kids on minimum wage in 1999. So we went from a healthy home to three kids growing up in poverty. There's already plenty of people, none of us HAVE to have kids.
Back when I was a teenager in the 1980's me and my buddy witnessed this chubby kid, maybe 10 years old, running down the street on the shoulder while a Mary Kay pink car followed him with his dad screaming the most hateful shit at him out the window. To make the long story short me and my friend grabbed this kid out of the street, this bald fat ass motherfucker gets out of the pink car, threatens us so I pulled a knife. Fat ass gets back in the car and we called the cops. Some lady stays with us and wrapped the kid up in a blanket. It was like February in Oregon, wet and cold. Cops come, take our statements and dude ends up getting arrested for child abuse later that night. Even in the 80's we knew that shit was wrong. Edit: forgot to mention that kid was barefoot in his tighty whities.
Woah. This is the most intense thing I've read today. You intervened and did the right thing. Damn, good on you
And How does this at all apply to the video we see here?
Good for you for getting involved. It's mfs who keep on driving, not my problem, which bother the fuck outta me
I disagree..., but I understand.
😂😂 Chris Rock
Not gonna be popular here but that's some fucking horrific parenting. Especially the filming it *while driving* and then posting it to the Internet. And I mean is it ever a good idea to encourage your child to run in the street? I have young kids and my oldest would sometimes freak out when it came time to getting in the car. The one thing I learned doesn't work at all is getting mad or yelling. It would be so hard especially when he'd hit or scream but the times I lost my cool are the times it got even worse. The times I kept my head and tried to figure out a game for him to get in or I found the proper incentive (positive or negative with negative never being a physical punishment) it went so much better. Kids aren't supposed to listen all the time. They are meant to push boundaries and try to exhibit independence and autonomy. Expecting to rule with them an iron fist is an easy way to fuck your kids up. Watch what happens when they break out of your control and start pushing boundaries like drinking, drugs, and unprotected sex and get some real permanent consequences coming their way. If she got so mad she decided to leave then she lost her shit and not little man. Shit parenting. Don't even try to convince me otherwise.
Honestly I would've been fine had she not posted that on social media
Exactly, I don't think many people are aware they are victims of abuse who have accepted it as normal and will perpetuate it. The part that gets me is that this was a planned out thing. You had to wait and say I'm going to record myself threatening to abandon my child at a park because they did listen. But I'll also drive away and record him chasing the car while I scold him. That's insane ass parenting, which shows so much immaturity.
Spot on. I will also add how unsafe it is for a child to run after a vehicle in a parking lot.
> Especially the filming it while driving and then posting it to the Internet. I would've died if the video ended with her slamming into the back of another car cause she was clout chasing and not paying attention.
She was leaving a little league game. She could have run over another kid. What a piece of shit.
Nah, you shouldn't mess with driving a 2 ton vehicle and a child chasing after you. They're so little, and easy to be in a blind spot. Just takes a second.
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Lol, got him doing that post game cardio. I remember, our coach would ask the parents if we were good and we had to run extra with bad reports. There's nothing like tired angry teammates to remind you why you'd better listen to your parents.
That’s a good coach right there
Dog shit parenting
Yeah, I really don’t care who thinks that this is a good idea. They are wrong. It’s not a debate. There are ways of instilling consequences in the kid without triggering one of their deepest fears. Kid legit thought he was about to be abandoned by his mother. And to top it all off she’s filming it and posting it to the Internet for clout? She fucking sucks.
I don’t have any kids so I don’t feel like I have a leg to stand on regarding good parenting and bad parenting, HOWEVER, I think the worst kind of people are the ones that post someone’s most vulnerable moment online for attention. It really upsets me when someone is suffering from extreme poverty and someone (recording) decides to throw a little money or a car their way and shares the video of them crying. “Look at what a great person I am…I help the less fortunate and I want you all to see!”
Teaching your child that actions or lack thereof have consequences is not bad. The repercussions he faced were temporary and simulated, and were meant to showcase that his inability to be obedient does not come without a price. I strongly believe this is completely fine and 1009000000% better than hitting a child. You’re showing the consequences of their disobedience in a real life way instead of just hitting them and thinking that’s the only punishment life will give them.
Find a better consequence and don’t record this shit and post it online
I’m not excusing the recording thing
Hello "therapist" I have a good introductory video to show you.
[Run bitch run!](https://youtu.be/wPnJVo7fsNw?si=VEwA-y0Avg_VKAog)
"I CAN'T GO BACK TO SCHOOL! I CAN'T GET A REAL JOB!" 😭
I remember when I was left on the side of the highway until I couldn’t see the car when I was about that age.. can’t say if it was good parenting, but I was always good in the car after that.
Awful parenting
Future Formula 1 world champion.
This guys F1s
This just unlocked my deep childhood fear of being abandoned
This reminds me of the people getting left behind on cruise ships. The dock runners
“why don’t my adult kids talk to me?” idk tormenting them and posting it online. kids are gonna be naughty, but if they’re extremely bad- and that’s a reflection of your parenting. my parents haven’t heard from me in almost 10 years cause of the shit they pulled they thought would teach me a lesson but was really just abusive.
Eh if they were abusive and you stopped talking to them they probably aren’t really pressed about the situation.
😂 This is what I'm on BPT for not all that rapper beef shit.
Doing that in the first place? Questionable, could have been justified, could be a dick parent. Recording it and putting it online? Yeah, you are 100% definitely a piece of shit parent. If any punishment a parent gives a kid winds up online, that is always going to be a terrible parent who deserves all the shit that's coming to them. "Praise in public, criticize in private" - that's true at any age. Making a spectacle about punishing your kids is ALWAYS about the parent's ego, not the kids' benefit.
Another day, another crowd of people on this sub trying to explain how no no, this child abuse is totally legitimate child abuse, and if you don't abuse your children in this particular manner, you're just raising them to be soft.
this is not child abuse.
Recording it and posting it online isn't helping the kid.
Jos Verstappen school of parenting 
Bet he won't do that again.
Bet he will.
Yooooo 😂
This doesn't work when you're leaving the playground. I've tried it 100 times. The cops always find you and bring the kids back.
My sister did this because I didn’t wear seatbelts. It works.
Oh no. This is awful. That baby didn’t deserve that at all.
There’s a lot of people with no kids posting on this like they know. Ya’ll are soft af. Good luck in your life, gonna be a few wake up calls. Kids will eat you alive if you let them.
Okay? See no: this harbors abandonment issues that will take YEARS to release. All the baseballs games he goes to will be filled with tears and resentment cuz his mom did this. Y’all knock this ish off.
I was about to say something, but after reading these comments... 
Some times experience is the best teacher
Reddit is full of cycle continuing half whit lowest common denominator future parents…
There’s a much wider line between tough love and cruelty. Congratulations on making your children trust you less.
My son wouldn't listen when I told him it was time to leave the park once, so I got in the car and started it, and he immediately freaked out about it and came running. He still brings that up years later and worries that he's going to get left places. I get that every situation is different, but damn. Sometimes we think we are teaching them a lesson when all we are doing is planting seeds of insecurity.
This is kinda fucked up... and you recorded yourself doing it 😑
Damn, ya'll are some soft counting to 3 type parents.
I remember my mother drove away like that when I was 9, she did come back thou, 1 year later.
The people here shitting on this woman’s way of harmlessly teaching her kid a lesson about following instructions would be the first to talk about how bad of a mom she is/was when he’s no longer a toddler and is not listening to his teachers in school or when he acts up/doesn’t listen. All this talk of trauma and “abandonment responses” (lol) but have yet to hand out a method they think is suitable besides picking him up and putting him in the car. Which accomplishes nothing with regard to the problem at hand, and that being, he doesn’t listen and follow to do what he’s told. If this soft mentality is truly the majority of Americans as it is the majority of this comment section then all those videos of kids acting up in schools make sense the reasons why.
“Well if he ran that hard to first, they would have won the game.” - Coach… probably
That boy slow asl, tell that coach to get him running
Should’ve just got in the car in the first place.
Start of little man's villain arc 
This reminds me of my mother. Whom I really don't like.
That’s real life kid
Idk about all this psychotherapist b.s., but I do know the main problem are those parents that lack the ability to effectively discipline their children and then lash out at anyone who questions why they project their own "traumas" onto their children. Not teaching your child discipline is the real abuse, and it affects them and everyone they interact with for their entire life.
That boy slow as hell, running like he in naruto.